June 27, 2025 • 34 mins
Anxiety isn't just "all in your head" — it's a complex neurological process that can be understood, managed, and even rewired. Brain coach Dominika joins Michael Cole to explain exactly how anxiety works in your brain and provide practical tools that actually work to interrupt anxious patterns.
Dominika breaks down the science simply: anxiety occurs when your amygdala overreacts "like a Christmas tree," triggering your limbic system and taking your prefrontal cortex (the logical part of your brain) offline. The result? You're ruled by emotions, feeling paralyzed, struggling to breathe, and unable to think clearly. But understanding this process gives you power to change it.
Rather than generic advice to "just meditate" when you're anxious (which Dominika explains is nearly impossible in that state), she offers specific, science-backed techniques like mental rehearsal, pattern interrupts, and the counterintuitive but crucial practice of staying in anxiety-provoking situations rather than fleeing. This last point is particularly powerful — when you leave, you reinforce your brain's belief that there was real danger.
What makes this conversation uniquely valuable is how Dominika connects psychology with biology. She explains why checking specific nutrient levels (ferritin, iron, magnesium, and D3) is essential for managing anxiety, why hormone fluctuations during perimenopause can trigger anxiety symptoms, and why taking random supplements without testing first can actually harm rather than help.
Most importantly, Dominika reminds us of neuroplasticity — your brain's lifelong ability to change and adapt. No matter your age or how long you've struggled with anxiety, you can create new neural pathways and responses. With her three powerful tips for veterans and their families, she leaves listeners with both practical tools and renewed hope: who you've been until now has nothing to do with who you can become.
Curious about Dominance & submission? Real stories, real fun, really kinky.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
Welcome to your Thoughts, your Reality with
Michael Cole, the podcast thatshines a compassionate light on
the journey of veterans battlingthrough life's challenges.
Michael is a dual elitecertified neuro encoding
specialist in coaching andkeynote training presentations
dedicated to guiding militaryveterans as they navigate the
intricate pathways ofpost-deployment life.
Speaker 2 (00:40):
Join him as we delve into the profound realm of neuro
encoding science, empoweringthese, hello, hello, hello
everybody.
Anxiety forging a new pathforward.
Hello, hello, hello everybody.
Your cat's back there.
That was awesome, yeah it madeits appearance.
Speaker 3 (00:55):
It did.
Speaker 2 (00:56):
Yeah, of course.
Of course, I haven't seen himin a while.
It's cool, hey everybody.
So today we have a Dominica on.
She is an international coachand author, specializing in
anxiety, adhd, depression andoverwhelm.
She's an expert with helpingpeople manage transition-related
mental health challenges, knownfor breaking down complex
(01:16):
psychology into simple,effective tools, which is super
important, has helped hundredsregain clarity, confidence and
control over their lives, and isa dear friend.
So, with that said, why don'tyou tell us a little bit more
about yourself?
Speaker 3 (01:32):
I don't know if I can say anything better.
I mean, the last thing I'velearned about myself is that
penguins do not want to hire me,so I've only worked on six
continents so far.
That's it.
That's basically it.
I mean, everything you've saidencompasses I don't know who
wrote this, but it wasn't me, soI'll take that for future
(01:53):
podcast introductions.
It was absolutely phenomenal.
Yes, I am a geek when it comesto neuroscience, understanding
how your brain works and makingthis practical.
So you don't have to takemedication, so you don't have to
struggle with cripplingfeelings of anxiety, fear of
failure, fear of success.
All of that is in our head, andI know it sounds very trivial,
(02:18):
but I don't mean in your headthat you've imagined it.
I mean in your head, becauseyour brain created it and you
have nothing to do with it.
It happened beside you and andwe will have a guest today on
the show.
So a lot of pattern interrupts.
So if you guys, you know, getdistracted easily, today's the
(02:38):
day to practice lack ofdistraction.
Speaker 2 (02:41):
I love it.
I love it.
I've not seen him in a while.
He had to come say hello.
Thank you for saying that.
So let's, before we get started, I just want to remind
everybody.
On the top right-hand corner ofyour screen there is a blue QR
code Scan.
That takes you toempowerperformancestrategiescom.
Again, for people listening onthe podcast forums later, it's
(03:04):
empowerperformancestrategiescom.
We have free eBooks, we haveresources, we have trainings, we
have two Facebook groups, bothfor civilians I'm sorry for
family members, and I said thistoo fast, I just got too too
normal with it Right?
And, of course, militaryveterans as well.
So please join the mission andbe part of the community.
(03:25):
So, with that said, so let'sreally dive in anxiety.
So it probably has differentdefinitions for different people
.
So what have you found?
Let's just start with what doesit mean?
What is it even more so?
What does it feel like?
Speaker 3 (03:47):
it feel like.
So everybody who you speak tobasically feels the outcome,
which is crippling, inability todo anything, feeling paralyzed.
It always shows up withdifficulty of breathing, either
pain in the chest or quickbreathing or lack of breathing
but goes both ways, but goesboth ways.
(04:07):
Anxiety is attached todifferent situations and to
different places in life anddifferent outcomes.
So some people have anxietybecause of work and they're, for
example, afraid and it doescome from fear that they're not
going to meet the deadlines, orthat they're not going to get a,
a promotion, or that they'renot good enough.
It is tied to imposter syndrome,or that you know they're not
(04:28):
going to look good enough forthe guy that they like, or for
the girl that they like, or forwhoever else that they like, or
that what people will think ofme, or I'm not good enough, mom,
or there's just so many things.
And that is something in yourbrain called amygdala
(04:49):
overreacting, and it fires uplike a Christmas freaking tree
where it's not supposed to be,and then it triggers your limbic
system in your brain, which isthe system responsible for all
your emotions, and what happensis it shuts down something
called prefrontal cortex, whichis the front part of your brain,
(05:10):
that's the executive function,when it takes it offline.
Your life is ruled by yourbrain, by your emotion.
It's very difficult to comeback from it, and prefrontal
cortex is the answer.
So, now that I sounded verysmart, we're going to make back
from it, and prefrontal cortexis the answer.
So, now that I sounded verysmart, I'm going to make this
very practical.
You don't just sound it.
Speaker 2 (05:31):
you are, but let's move on.
Speaker 3 (05:35):
I want to make sure that I like the fact that we can
now understand emotions on theprocess level, because if you
understand the process, you canchange the process on the
process level, because if youunderstand the process, you can
change the process.
So what is your now?
We don't have readily availablecold baths everywhere we go
(05:56):
when we hit anxiety.
That would be a great way tostop it, but I don't think all
of us run around with cold bathsand just jump in, you know, in
the middle of the meeting, say,excuse me, I need to, I need a
minute.
That will work.
So one of the things that workswonderfully is, besides working
with a coach or a therapist, isactually creating mental
(06:20):
rehearsals that will allow youto understand, and we all teach
this little thing, and you knowthis, as I think, so I feel, as
I feel, so I do, as I do, so Ihave, but before, this is what I
believe.
And mental rehearsal iscreating a situation where your
(06:40):
anxiety is growing and you'reable to stop it.
Your anxiety is growing andyou're able to stop it and you
imagine that vividly, and thenyou do something that's going to
be specific to you you clapyour hands, you shake that.
You shake that ass, whateverelse you want to do, or
something subtle if you're in apublic meeting.
(07:00):
Another thing that we do is thatwe try to take back our
prefrontal cortex online.
We want to turn it back on,because the antidote to
heightened emotions is logic andthe only way we can access
logic is if we turn this back on.
So, for example, quick, rapidmovement is an answer, something
(07:22):
that you can go outside, go fora walk and concentrate on
anything but your thoughts.
Don't ignore your thoughts, say, oh yeah, it's happening again,
and then go and concentrate ona flower, on a bird, on a zit on
the nose of your friend.
That works too.
Anything that will distract you.
(07:42):
I know, I know, I love itbecause it's real, it's real
right.
Or, you know, if you're a guy,concentrate on the cleavage.
I don't know anything, whateverthat means so really quick.
Speaker 2 (07:55):
Though I love that you're going into giving the
skills, I want to go back onestep.
Okay, you're feeling your heartbeating.
You're feeling anxiety,overwhelm, anxiousness, whatever
you want to call it.
For you, how do you get moreand more?
(08:17):
Because it's about realizing itfirst.
Right, because the faster youcan realize it, the faster you
can kill the monster before itgets to an extreme place.
So give us some thoughts, ifyou will just really quick, and
we'll jump back, obviously, togive more tools.
But what do you look for?
I know the heart rate, thosethings you just talked about
(08:39):
fantastic.
But how do you snap yourselfand say, oh shit, I'm here.
Speaker 3 (08:43):
Well, first of all, you need to recognize what's the
process.
So first is self-discovery, andthat's you know.
When you're in a calm state,remember situations that
triggered anxiety, becausethere's always one thing that
leads to another.
There is always a process.
Your brain is very, veryprocess oriented.
So if there is red color Idon't know, big smile, whatever
(09:08):
that might mean, a thought thatcomes up, somebody's tone of
voice, something that remindsyou of something, you need to
know what that is that triggersthat feeling.
Because overall, anxiety is notbad.
This is a good thing.
It becomes bad when itovertakes your life and that's
(09:30):
the challenge when it preventsyou from leaving living.
So I want you to find thatthing that creates that anxiety
thought, belief, situation,color, sound of voice, certain
way people react, maybe theywalk, or something that makes
you feel very uncomfortable.
(09:50):
Because in your brain, anxietyis the same thing as excitement.
The same circuit works on both.
So you basically the brainworks the same way is excited.
Now, what changes at the end isthe outcome?
(10:11):
You will believe you will fail,you will believe that's going
to be amazing, and the outcomecreates a different feeling, and
you associate that with adifferent feeling.
Now, that being theneuroscience.
Knowing yourself is the key togetting rid of all the feelings
and to diminishing them.
(10:33):
So we can use, for example,another thing, which is Dr
Barron.
She had those four questionswhich are phenomenal, like if
you go into, oh my God, they'regoing to hate me, I'm not going
to do good.
Withdraw yourself from thesituation, but don't leave the
room.
That's very important If youdon't want to reinforce your
anxiety.
Do not ever leave when thefeeling shows up.
(10:56):
With panic attacks and anxiety,it's the same thing.
Stay, because when you leaveyou teach your brain that there
was something dangerous and youreinforce that feeling.
So stay, no matter what.
Stay.
Call your friend.
You reinforce that feeling.
So stay, no matter what.
Stay.
Call your friend, look at amirror, grab a friend's hand,
look at the table, look at thefloor, look at the ceiling.
I don't care.
Stay, that feeling will go away, I promise.
(11:18):
Just, it'll take a while at thebeginning.
Speaker 2 (11:20):
Phenomenal tip, by the way, absolutely phenomenal
yeah.
Speaker 3 (11:30):
And when you stay, concentrate on something you can
control, like your breath.
Now, stopping the thoughts withthoughts is not going to work.
Your brain is kind of literal,so when it goes into a mode
people telling you go meditateit's not going to work, because
your brain is unable to meditatewhen it's in a state of fear.
It just won't work.
So one of the things we can dois to use the same tool that we
(11:53):
use for panic attacks Take somelemon and bite on a lemon.
I would not suggest hurtingyourself to inflicting pain, but
lemon works great.
So what happens is your braingoes oh my God, there's
something happening somewhereelse, and it takes away the
(12:13):
focus from your thoughts to thesourness in your mouth.
That's the time where you canstart either doing the breathing
exercise, you can do otherthings that might stop you.
Now, when we get there, thetruth is, those are those four
magical questions you could askIs it true?
(12:35):
Is it really true?
Who would I be without thatthought?
And what is the proof that thisis not true?
And what is the proof that thisis not true?
And this is a little bitchanged from what she teaches.
So, for example, oh my God,they're going to hate me.
(13:01):
Is it true?
Well, I don't know.
Is it 100% true?
Well, no, I cannot know.
If 100% true, so what you justdid?
You dismantled the very strongconviction.
Then you go.
Okay, who would I be without thethought that they're not going
to like me?
Well, I would be calm, I wouldbe relaxed, I would be happy.
I would be curious what is theproof that in the past, this was
not true?
(13:21):
Well, I've met a lot of peopleand they liked me.
Well, I very often meet peopleand I'm curious about them and
most people react positively tome.
So, just walking, so turning onyour prefrontal cortex these are
the questions that turn it onand looking for proof allows
(13:41):
your brain to decompress thestress, decompress the anxiety,
and I usually like to add OK,what would be great about today?
And that allows me to forcemyself, because at that point
you're forcing.
This is not natural.
So if you guys think this willbe natural, it's not.
It is a tool that you need totrain and it's going to be
(14:02):
uncomfortable, weird, and thewhole nine yards, right, and you
go Hmm, okay, so what's goingto be great about today?
And make yourself find threereasons.
It doesn't have to be a wholelong list.
I guarantee you that this willlower the anxiety level.
It will allow you another thingI love to do with my clients
(14:25):
for anxiety.
Okay, before we go into thatreally quick.
Speaker 2 (14:29):
Keep that thought, I know.
Just keep the thought, don'tget sidetracked.
So, and guys, celebrate it.
Celebrate when you go throughthe process.
Just take a minute, patyourself on the back, do
whatever you need to do, smileand celebrate that you went
through the process and work theprocess, Like she's saying,
cause it is a muscle.
It's not just magically all ofa sudden, Boom, I'm perfect.
(14:52):
I can do this anytime I want to.
No, because you're going to getin the shit and then you're
going to go.
What do I do?
But the more you work it, themore you're going to get in that
place to just automaticallydefault and be able to go and do
it.
That's all I want to say.
Please go ahead.
Speaker 3 (15:07):
I absolutely love it, agreed, 100%, support it.
And do we like to play aroundand fool around and be kids?
Because I hope you guys do.
One of the weirdest things thatworks for anxiety to calm down
your nervous system is to go andswing.
Love it On a real swing forkids.
(15:28):
And you go, we, we, we lookmaybe kind of odd, being an
adult, but who cares?
It works and it's free.
Now what it does.
It calms down your nervoussystem and at that time I highly
suggest the mental rehearsalimagining you going into that
room.
Imagine you're seeing peopleyou've never seen.
Imagine they're smiling at you.
(15:49):
Imagine they like you.
Imagine how you feel whenthat's happening.
That's very important.
Not only imagine the situation,but how it makes you feel.
And, to tell you the truth,this method saved me.
Yesterday I was speaking at apretty big conference called
Aging in Texas and I was talkingabout brain health and
preventing anxiety, depression,dementia, alzheimer's and all
(16:10):
those fun things.
And you know I sent mypresentation.
Everything was ready Nightbefore.
I imagined how amazing it'sgoing to be, how much they're
going to love me, how fantasticit's going to be.
And I get there, we're startingand we're pressing.
10 minutes before getting readythe presentation and nothing is
(16:39):
working.
I look great, the audience isthere, over 50 people ready to
listen to me as a brain healthexpert.
Nothing's working.
So we try to close the computer, open the computer, you know,
reset, ready to go, fire up, andnothing is working.
It's five minutes till.
We keep doing it, we'reswitching, they're talking.
You know, there was music,there was a great beginning,
there was a lot of great thingsand I'm like, holy crap, that's
(17:02):
a lot of medical informationthat we're giving here.
I do need my cheat sheet, whichis the presentation, and I'm
like.
I'm like, okay, well, this isgoing to be great, it's going to
be fantastic, they're going tolove me.
So the it comes in and I'm like,just do whatever you need to do
.
And I start talking.
But he doesn't know that I'mokay with him working on a
computer while I'm talking.
(17:22):
So he just stands there and I'mlike you can please, please,
keep going.
And then I see a camera, whichis my camera, but I forgot to
turn it on.
I'm like you can please, please, keep going.
And then I see a camera, whichis my camera, but I forgot to
turn it on.
I'm like great, I'm not goingto have a recording of this
Fantastic, let's just keep going.
So I'm talking and then aboutsix minutes in.
I don't know what he did.
(17:42):
He switched computers, hetransferred the presentations.
He does it and it goes online.
I swear all of us startedlaughing and clapping.
I was like, oh my goodness,thank you that I have a gift of
talking, because that sixminutes would have been very
challenging and someone elsewould have been sitting there
(18:02):
sweating ran off the stage.
I mean, it was me imagining it'sgoing to go great and I just
kept reminding myself it's goingto go great, it's going to be
great, and I forgot that therewas a music piece at the very
beginning.
So I click and the music comeson very loud and people are like
what is happening?
I'm like fantastic.
So now we all can sing.
(18:23):
I'm like what the heck ishappening.
But I got them singing with meand then we, of course, switched
to another slide and went tothe professional.
See, life gives you a lot ofthings, but if you are assuming
it's going to be great, you justmake it work.
And it's not Say that again,life will give you a lot of
(18:46):
challenges, but if you'reassuming it's going to be great,
you are going to make it work.
Speaker 2 (18:53):
Just let that sink in for a minute.
Everybody Just let that sink in.
So I have to share really quickas we are getting ready to
start here.
I press go live because I doall my own tech.
Everybody.
I press go live.
I started getting all thesealerts and I did the same thing.
(19:15):
It's going to be great.
I've worked through stuffbefore I'm going to figure this
out and it's going to befantastic.
It's going to be fun.
Just know it's going to workout the way it's supposed to and
people are going to love you.
Just be yourself and just go.
Speaker 3 (19:31):
Yes, and you know what that imperfection at the
beginning and how I handled itit got the audience so close to
me.
They got me.
They were like, oh, thishappened to me.
I wish I don't want to be her.
I could see in their face andthey were routing for me because
they want you to do well, mostpeople want you to do well, and
(19:51):
when something is happening toyou, they're kind of feeling it
with you.
So, yes, we were more connectedand we kind of felt the pain of
technology that can play trickis because everybody went
through it.
If you think you're alone inthose things, no, you're not.
(20:12):
Yeah, so anxiety is the assumedoutcome.
Very often it is your brainoverreacting and there are ways
to train your amygdala not totake over.
It does depend on your braintype.
It does depend on whatenvironment you're in.
(20:33):
And I want to tell you onething If there's an environment
that keeps triggering you intoanxiety, there's something I
took to heart from an AAtraining that I went to when I
was working with some people whoare addicted.
I wanted to know how does AA doit?
So I went through theirtrainings and there's one very
important sentence rest, howeveryou think about it.
(20:55):
But it's so important.
When you get sick in oneenvironment, you will not get
better in the same environment.
You need to be leaving the areathat keeps triggering you.
You cannot be around until youget stronger and you're ready.
People who have addictionsthey're taking out to different
areas of the world, state cityto heal and they're allowed, and
(21:21):
it's not just to go back untila year later after you finish
treatment.
You need to get stronger.
Those triggers, as we call them,those situations, that kind of
your brain associated and createcertain feelings and behaviors.
That is something you need toavoid until you get better.
And very often when you getbetter, you're like I really
(21:43):
don't want this in my life, sowhy would I go back?
Exactly, anxiety is somethingthat our brain creates with.
That is connected to lowself-esteem as well.
It is connected to fear.
But all of those are brainhealth issues.
They're not psychologicalissues.
They manifest themselves aspsychological issues that create
(22:07):
behavioral outcomes oremotional feelings or lack of
breath, you know, sweating, allof those things.
And if we can work with thebrain specifically using
specific tools, we can literallyrewire the brain so that
doesn't have power over youanymore.
Wouldn't that be great.
Speaker 2 (22:28):
And go into that.
Please Go into that deeper.
So I know it's a plethora ofinformation, but just just talk
about some of the let's go withanxiety specifically, Some of
the things that are happening inyour brain that you have to
work with.
Speaker 3 (22:44):
Okay.
So first of all, we're going tostart with the brain, as it's
an organ, it's a biologicalorgan in your body, like your
heart, like your liver, likeyour stomach.
So if you're prone to anxiety,stress and depression, you're
going to go and get your bloodwork done.
We're going to start with thebasics and you're going to check
(23:05):
ferritin, iron, magnesium andD3 levels.
I'm going to repeat thatFerritin, iron, magnesium and D3
levels.
And if you're less than 70thpercentile and now an asterisk
comes, if you have any type ofsevere illnesses, please check
(23:26):
with your doctor.
But if in general, you'rehealthy, you want to be in the
norm, in the upper norm.
So let's say, your D3 is at alevel of 40, which is in the
norm.
That's not helping your brainand your anxiety.
You need to be between 50 and70.
(23:47):
Now a doctor might not suggesttaking D3 because you're in the
norm.
Same with ferritin, iron andmagnesium.
All of these produceneurotransmitters that calm down
your nervous system.
You need that.
So that's the first step.
When we got that down, nextthing we're going to go.
Okay.
Why is my amygdala overacting?
Speaker 2 (24:10):
Can you go back one second?
Can you go to your normaldoctor and request these tests?
Speaker 3 (24:14):
Yes, you can, these are regular tests.
And they might say I don't seea reason why Be persistent.
Yes, be persistent, yes,persistent, because, um, I can
tell you a lot of stories whenDr Go, I don't see a reason why
I was like, well, I do so, we'regoing to do that, but I don't
know.
We'll find a reason.
And if they didn't find areason, I switched the doctor
because I knew something was offand mine.
(24:36):
Your doctor is a great human andhe has studied and she has
studied a lot.
But there is a reason why wespecialize in different things.
There is a reason why there'sno way anybody can know
everything about the brain ifthey don't specialize in the
brain.
There's no way a cardiologistis going to be expert on the gut
(24:58):
.
It's just that doesn't worklike this.
So your general doctor has ajob to understand the general
function of your body.
But when there's somethingspecific and you have knowledge,
you have every right toadvocate for yourself and be
persistent.
And if they don't like it,that's okay, I'll switch a
doctor.
And there was once I switcheddoctors seven times and the
(25:19):
eighth one agreed to do what Iwanted to try.
Speaker 2 (25:22):
Yeah, and I'm going to just add to it you know, it
is your health, you know if yourdoctor is not team you.
I agree, like you're sayingfind, find one, that is.
Speaker 3 (25:34):
And you know there are different trainings,
different perspectives andthey're also human right.
It's like for years and yearsfor women that are veterans
especially.
You know we were told thathormonal replacement therapy
creates breast cancer.
We have abolished that 50,000times already with science and
yet there are still doctors whogo.
(25:55):
Well, I wouldn't recommend HRTbecause it changes your
psychology and you can getcancer.
That's absolute BS.
Your brain, your anxiety, isconnected to your hormones,
right?
So that's another thing we needto check If you're in
perimenopause.
Guess what it comes with theperimenopause time anxiety,
depression and stress.
And it's not you, it is yourhormones going haywire.
(26:19):
There are ways to fix this.
Go to the right doctor.
But it's so important not toseparate psychology from biology
.
That's why I say I hackpsychology with biology, because
when your biology works right,it's easier for your brain to
take care of those connectionsthat it created unknowingly and
create new behaviors.
(26:41):
I mean, imagine how difficultit is to be a great husband If
you're constantly in pain andyou have phantom pains and
you're living with constant pain.
Everybody's expecting you to beloving and caring and not
snappy.
Well, try living with constantpain, right.
Speaker 1 (26:58):
Right.
Speaker 3 (26:59):
So that biology is an important step in coaching and
getting better.
So get that right.
And then let's look at yourbrain.
Maybe we need to scan yourbrain, Dr Amen.
Maybe you just need anassessment that brain coaches
have and we see which brain typeyou have, because you might be
prone to anxiety.
But the beautiful thing aboutthe brain is the science of
(27:21):
neuroplasticity.
Your brain is not.
It's the way it is, but you canchange it.
That's the beauty ofneuroplasticity.
And there's no end age.
That's BS that you cannot teachto all dog new tricks.
Speaker 2 (27:34):
Absolutely, you definitely can, and we've got a
couple of minutes left.
If we can, can we just touchbase a little bit more on what
you're talking about with thedifferent chemicals or, I'm
sorry, nutrients?
We talked about you knowmagnesium and those kinds of
things.
Is there anything else you wantto leave with on that stuff?
That's important for us to getthe test done, all that stuff.
But what to where to go fromthere?
Speaker 3 (27:59):
You got the test done , let's just go there well, you
got the test done and you knowwhat levels you need to achieve.
So, with your doctor or on yourown um, make sure you upgrade
that a little pro tip that itjust showed up a few years ago
and pub med.
If you take iron every otherday, it will absorb better, so
(28:20):
don't take it every day, um, andmake sure those levels are up.
Obviously, if you're sick, youhave some issues.
Make sure you do it with yourprimary doctor, um that you
don't overdo it, because one ofthe things I want to tell you is
that overdoing on supplementsand vitamins can be hurtful as
well.
So please just don't, becausesomebody told you that d3 is
good for you, don't start starttaking D3.
(28:41):
First get your base level,check what you want.
Speaker 2 (28:45):
I'm so glad you said that because we are our society,
or the stigma is, we don't haveenough.
We're getting just bombarded onevery platform social media et
cetera that, oh, you need totake this.
No, you take this.
No, you take this.
And no, that's not right.
Speaker 3 (29:01):
You take this, you know, so you know find out what
you really need, always startwith blood work.
You need to know what your bodyhas and then, according to this
, don't run out.
I had a lady who came to me andshe had some anxiety and she
had a lot of stress levels andshe would be forgetful.
So one of the things we do welook at not as medical
(29:24):
professionals but, just to youknow, have an oversight of what
that person is taking.
She was taking eightsupplements with vitamin B and
her B was through the roof andshe goes maybe I need vitamin B
shots.
So I'm looking at her, I'm like, look, I'm not a doctor, but
you're 400 over the norm.
I don't think you need vitaminB shots.
(29:45):
I think you need to go to adoctor because I don't know how
to deal with, you know, overextension of vitamin B, right?
Speaker 2 (29:52):
Right.
Speaker 3 (29:54):
Check before you decide on your health.
Don't buy like a crazy person.
Speaker 2 (30:01):
And I've done it.
I'm owning it.
I've done it and I take.
I do not take nearly what Iused to.
It is just so dramaticallydifferent.
I mean, literally, you'reputting all this stuff in your
body and it doesn't need it inthe first place.
Speaker 3 (30:14):
And too much is not good either.
It's like I'm going to just saycause we're adults, right, we,
most people love sex, but, um,having sex 12 times a day
probably is not a good idea.
You will not love it as muchand it's not good for your body.
I've known cases like this.
They ended up in hospitals andwe're not going to talk about
(30:34):
that right now, right, but it'sa way.
People anxiety Isn't thatinteresting, so absolutely.
Speaker 2 (30:43):
Hey, so we're over time.
So, with that said, how dopeople reach you?
Speaker 3 (30:47):
Well, you can find me on your brain coach D, on
Instagram, linkedin, facebookand everywhere else.
You can also reach out to me tocontact at your brain coach D
dot com.
You can find me under my firstand last name on Facebook and
LinkedIn.
I am happy to support you asyour trainer, coach or a speaker
(31:07):
.
I love seeing the aha momentsand making the world a better
place with the knowledge we havewith neuroscience.
So you can use it and just makeyour life the way you want to,
absolutely.
Speaker 2 (31:20):
Fantastic.
So, with that said, the lastpart, three tips to get veterans
and their families further past.
Speaker 3 (31:29):
Be aware of your baseline.
Number two understand whereyour feelings come from and if
you don't know how, get a coach,trainer, therapist or whoever
else.
Understand the process.
Number three who you are untilnow has nothing to do with what
you want to be, because yourbrain created that without you
(31:53):
Now knowing what you know, nowyou have a choice of taking life
into your hands and becoming abetter leader, better mother,
better husband, better friend,happier human.
Or you can just say I don'tknow what to do and play the
victim role.
Speaker 2 (32:13):
And our society is so wrapped with that.
Hey, let's do the other andmove forward, shall we?
Let's be the difference.
I love it, absolutely love it.
Thank you so much, my dearfriend.
Time is the most preciousresource we have as human beings
.
We don't get it back.
Thank you for being on againand just giving us real
(32:34):
information, not only withscience, but also with some fun.
So, thank you, reallyappreciate it.
Speaker 3 (32:39):
Thank you so much.
It was my pleasure, and thankyou for giving me your time.
Speaker 2 (32:41):
Oh, absolutely All right, we're out of here
everybody.
Speaker 1 (32:47):
Thank you for joining us on another insightful
journey of your Thoughts yourReality podcast with your host,
michael Cole.
We hope the conversationsparked some thoughts that
resonate with you.
To dive deeper into empoweringyour thoughts and enhancing your
reality, visitempowerperformancestrategiescom.
Remember your thoughts shapeyour reality, so make them count
(33:09):
.
Until next time, stay inspiredand keep creating the reality
you desire.
Catch you on the next episode.
Welcome to your Thoughts, your Reality with
Michael Cole, the podcast thatshines a compassionate light on
the journey of veterans battlingthrough life's challenges.
Michael is a dual elitecertified neuro encoding
specialist in coaching andkeynote training presentations
dedicated to guiding militaryveterans as they navigate the
intricate pathways ofpost-deployment life.
Speaker 2 (00:40):
Join him as we delve into the profound realm of neuro
encoding science, empoweringthese, hello, hello, hello
everybody.
Anxiety forging a new pathforward.
Hello, hello, hello everybody.
Your cat's back there.
That was awesome, yeah it madeits appearance.
Speaker 3 (00:55):
It did.
Speaker 2 (00:56):
Yeah, of course.
Of course, I haven't seen himin a while.
It's cool, hey everybody.
So today we have a Dominica on.
She is an international coachand author, specializing in
anxiety, adhd, depression andoverwhelm.
She's an expert with helpingpeople manage transition-related
mental health challenges, knownfor breaking down complex
(01:16):
psychology into simple,effective tools, which is super
important, has helped hundredsregain clarity, confidence and
control over their lives, and isa dear friend.
So, with that said, why don'tyou tell us a little bit more
about yourself?
Speaker 3 (01:32):
I don't know if I can say anything better.
I mean, the last thing I'velearned about myself is that
penguins do not want to hire me,so I've only worked on six
continents so far.
That's it.
That's basically it.
I mean, everything you've saidencompasses I don't know who
wrote this, but it wasn't me, soI'll take that for future
(01:53):
podcast introductions.
It was absolutely phenomenal.
Yes, I am a geek when it comesto neuroscience, understanding
how your brain works and makingthis practical.
So you don't have to takemedication, so you don't have to
struggle with cripplingfeelings of anxiety, fear of
failure, fear of success.
All of that is in our head, andI know it sounds very trivial,
(02:18):
but I don't mean in your headthat you've imagined it.
I mean in your head, becauseyour brain created it and you
have nothing to do with it.
It happened beside you and andwe will have a guest today on
the show.
So a lot of pattern interrupts.
So if you guys, you know, getdistracted easily, today's the
(02:38):
day to practice lack ofdistraction.
Speaker 2 (02:41):
I love it.
I love it.
I've not seen him in a while.
He had to come say hello.
Thank you for saying that.
So let's, before we get started, I just want to remind
everybody.
On the top right-hand corner ofyour screen there is a blue QR
code Scan.
That takes you toempowerperformancestrategiescom.
Again, for people listening onthe podcast forums later, it's
(03:04):
empowerperformancestrategiescom.
We have free eBooks, we haveresources, we have trainings, we
have two Facebook groups, bothfor civilians I'm sorry for
family members, and I said thistoo fast, I just got too too
normal with it Right?
And, of course, militaryveterans as well.
So please join the mission andbe part of the community.
(03:25):
So, with that said, so let'sreally dive in anxiety.
So it probably has differentdefinitions for different people
.
So what have you found?
Let's just start with what doesit mean?
What is it even more so?
What does it feel like?
Speaker 3 (03:47):
it feel like.
So everybody who you speak tobasically feels the outcome,
which is crippling, inability todo anything, feeling paralyzed.
It always shows up withdifficulty of breathing, either
pain in the chest or quickbreathing or lack of breathing
but goes both ways, but goesboth ways.
(04:07):
Anxiety is attached todifferent situations and to
different places in life anddifferent outcomes.
So some people have anxietybecause of work and they're, for
example, afraid and it doescome from fear that they're not
going to meet the deadlines, orthat they're not going to get a,
a promotion, or that they'renot good enough.
It is tied to imposter syndrome,or that you know they're not
(04:28):
going to look good enough forthe guy that they like, or for
the girl that they like, or forwhoever else that they like, or
that what people will think ofme, or I'm not good enough, mom,
or there's just so many things.
And that is something in yourbrain called amygdala
(04:49):
overreacting, and it fires uplike a Christmas freaking tree
where it's not supposed to be,and then it triggers your limbic
system in your brain, which isthe system responsible for all
your emotions, and what happensis it shuts down something
called prefrontal cortex, whichis the front part of your brain,
(05:10):
that's the executive function,when it takes it offline.
Your life is ruled by yourbrain, by your emotion.
It's very difficult to comeback from it, and prefrontal
cortex is the answer.
So, now that I sounded verysmart, we're going to make back
from it, and prefrontal cortexis the answer.
So, now that I sounded verysmart, I'm going to make this
very practical.
You don't just sound it.
Speaker 2 (05:31):
you are, but let's move on.
Speaker 3 (05:35):
I want to make sure that I like the fact that we can
now understand emotions on theprocess level, because if you
understand the process, you canchange the process on the
process level, because if youunderstand the process, you can
change the process.
So what is your now?
We don't have readily availablecold baths everywhere we go
(05:56):
when we hit anxiety.
That would be a great way tostop it, but I don't think all
of us run around with cold bathsand just jump in, you know, in
the middle of the meeting, say,excuse me, I need to, I need a
minute.
That will work.
So one of the things that workswonderfully is, besides working
with a coach or a therapist, isactually creating mental
(06:20):
rehearsals that will allow youto understand, and we all teach
this little thing, and you knowthis, as I think, so I feel, as
I feel, so I do, as I do, so Ihave, but before, this is what I
believe.
And mental rehearsal iscreating a situation where your
(06:40):
anxiety is growing and you'reable to stop it.
Your anxiety is growing andyou're able to stop it and you
imagine that vividly, and thenyou do something that's going to
be specific to you you clapyour hands, you shake that.
You shake that ass, whateverelse you want to do, or
something subtle if you're in apublic meeting.
(07:00):
Another thing that we do is thatwe try to take back our
prefrontal cortex online.
We want to turn it back on,because the antidote to
heightened emotions is logic andthe only way we can access
logic is if we turn this back on.
So, for example, quick, rapidmovement is an answer, something
(07:22):
that you can go outside, go fora walk and concentrate on
anything but your thoughts.
Don't ignore your thoughts, say, oh yeah, it's happening again,
and then go and concentrate ona flower, on a bird, on a zit on
the nose of your friend.
That works too.
Anything that will distract you.
(07:42):
I know, I know, I love itbecause it's real, it's real
right.
Or, you know, if you're a guy,concentrate on the cleavage.
I don't know anything, whateverthat means so really quick.
Speaker 2 (07:55):
Though I love that you're going into giving the
skills, I want to go back onestep.
Okay, you're feeling your heartbeating.
You're feeling anxiety,overwhelm, anxiousness, whatever
you want to call it.
For you, how do you get moreand more?
(08:17):
Because it's about realizing itfirst.
Right, because the faster youcan realize it, the faster you
can kill the monster before itgets to an extreme place.
So give us some thoughts, ifyou will just really quick, and
we'll jump back, obviously, togive more tools.
But what do you look for?
I know the heart rate, thosethings you just talked about
(08:39):
fantastic.
But how do you snap yourselfand say, oh shit, I'm here.
Speaker 3 (08:43):
Well, first of all, you need to recognize what's the
process.
So first is self-discovery, andthat's you know.
When you're in a calm state,remember situations that
triggered anxiety, becausethere's always one thing that
leads to another.
There is always a process.
Your brain is very, veryprocess oriented.
So if there is red color Idon't know, big smile, whatever
(09:08):
that might mean, a thought thatcomes up, somebody's tone of
voice, something that remindsyou of something, you need to
know what that is that triggersthat feeling.
Because overall, anxiety is notbad.
This is a good thing.
It becomes bad when itovertakes your life and that's
(09:30):
the challenge when it preventsyou from leaving living.
So I want you to find thatthing that creates that anxiety
thought, belief, situation,color, sound of voice, certain
way people react, maybe theywalk, or something that makes
you feel very uncomfortable.
(09:50):
Because in your brain, anxietyis the same thing as excitement.
The same circuit works on both.
So you basically the brainworks the same way is excited.
Now, what changes at the end isthe outcome?
(10:11):
You will believe you will fail,you will believe that's going
to be amazing, and the outcomecreates a different feeling, and
you associate that with adifferent feeling.
Now, that being theneuroscience.
Knowing yourself is the key togetting rid of all the feelings
and to diminishing them.
(10:33):
So we can use, for example,another thing, which is Dr
Barron.
She had those four questionswhich are phenomenal, like if
you go into, oh my God, they'regoing to hate me, I'm not going
to do good.
Withdraw yourself from thesituation, but don't leave the
room.
That's very important If youdon't want to reinforce your
anxiety.
Do not ever leave when thefeeling shows up.
(10:56):
With panic attacks and anxiety,it's the same thing.
Stay, because when you leaveyou teach your brain that there
was something dangerous and youreinforce that feeling.
So stay, no matter what.
Stay.
Call your friend.
You reinforce that feeling.
So stay, no matter what.
Stay.
Call your friend, look at amirror, grab a friend's hand,
look at the table, look at thefloor, look at the ceiling.
I don't care.
Stay, that feeling will go away, I promise.
(11:18):
Just, it'll take a while at thebeginning.
Speaker 2 (11:20):
Phenomenal tip, by the way, absolutely phenomenal
yeah.
Speaker 3 (11:30):
And when you stay, concentrate on something you can
control, like your breath.
Now, stopping the thoughts withthoughts is not going to work.
Your brain is kind of literal,so when it goes into a mode
people telling you go meditateit's not going to work, because
your brain is unable to meditatewhen it's in a state of fear.
It just won't work.
So one of the things we can dois to use the same tool that we
(11:53):
use for panic attacks Take somelemon and bite on a lemon.
I would not suggest hurtingyourself to inflicting pain, but
lemon works great.
So what happens is your braingoes oh my God, there's
something happening somewhereelse, and it takes away the
(12:13):
focus from your thoughts to thesourness in your mouth.
That's the time where you canstart either doing the breathing
exercise, you can do otherthings that might stop you.
Now, when we get there, thetruth is, those are those four
magical questions you could askIs it true?
(12:35):
Is it really true?
Who would I be without thatthought?
And what is the proof that thisis not true?
And what is the proof that thisis not true?
And this is a little bitchanged from what she teaches.
So, for example, oh my God,they're going to hate me.
(13:01):
Is it true?
Well, I don't know.
Is it 100% true?
Well, no, I cannot know.
If 100% true, so what you justdid?
You dismantled the very strongconviction.
Then you go.
Okay, who would I be without thethought that they're not going
to like me?
Well, I would be calm, I wouldbe relaxed, I would be happy.
I would be curious what is theproof that in the past, this was
not true?
(13:21):
Well, I've met a lot of peopleand they liked me.
Well, I very often meet peopleand I'm curious about them and
most people react positively tome.
So, just walking, so turning onyour prefrontal cortex these are
the questions that turn it onand looking for proof allows
(13:41):
your brain to decompress thestress, decompress the anxiety,
and I usually like to add OK,what would be great about today?
And that allows me to forcemyself, because at that point
you're forcing.
This is not natural.
So if you guys think this willbe natural, it's not.
It is a tool that you need totrain and it's going to be
(14:02):
uncomfortable, weird, and thewhole nine yards, right, and you
go Hmm, okay, so what's goingto be great about today?
And make yourself find threereasons.
It doesn't have to be a wholelong list.
I guarantee you that this willlower the anxiety level.
It will allow you another thingI love to do with my clients
(14:25):
for anxiety.
Okay, before we go into thatreally quick.
Speaker 2 (14:29):
Keep that thought, I know.
Just keep the thought, don'tget sidetracked.
So, and guys, celebrate it.
Celebrate when you go throughthe process.
Just take a minute, patyourself on the back, do
whatever you need to do, smileand celebrate that you went
through the process and work theprocess, Like she's saying,
cause it is a muscle.
It's not just magically all ofa sudden, Boom, I'm perfect.
(14:52):
I can do this anytime I want to.
No, because you're going to getin the shit and then you're
going to go.
What do I do?
But the more you work it, themore you're going to get in that
place to just automaticallydefault and be able to go and do
it.
That's all I want to say.
Please go ahead.
Speaker 3 (15:07):
I absolutely love it, agreed, 100%, support it.
And do we like to play aroundand fool around and be kids?
Because I hope you guys do.
One of the weirdest things thatworks for anxiety to calm down
your nervous system is to go andswing.
Love it On a real swing forkids.
(15:28):
And you go, we, we, we lookmaybe kind of odd, being an
adult, but who cares?
It works and it's free.
Now what it does.
It calms down your nervoussystem and at that time I highly
suggest the mental rehearsalimagining you going into that
room.
Imagine you're seeing peopleyou've never seen.
Imagine they're smiling at you.
(15:49):
Imagine they like you.
Imagine how you feel whenthat's happening.
That's very important.
Not only imagine the situation,but how it makes you feel.
And, to tell you the truth,this method saved me.
Yesterday I was speaking at apretty big conference called
Aging in Texas and I was talkingabout brain health and
preventing anxiety, depression,dementia, alzheimer's and all
(16:10):
those fun things.
And you know I sent mypresentation.
Everything was ready Nightbefore.
I imagined how amazing it'sgoing to be, how much they're
going to love me, how fantasticit's going to be.
And I get there, we're startingand we're pressing.
10 minutes before getting readythe presentation and nothing is
(16:39):
working.
I look great, the audience isthere, over 50 people ready to
listen to me as a brain healthexpert.
Nothing's working.
So we try to close the computer, open the computer, you know,
reset, ready to go, fire up, andnothing is working.
It's five minutes till.
We keep doing it, we'reswitching, they're talking.
You know, there was music,there was a great beginning,
there was a lot of great thingsand I'm like, holy crap, that's
(17:02):
a lot of medical informationthat we're giving here.
I do need my cheat sheet, whichis the presentation, and I'm
like.
I'm like, okay, well, this isgoing to be great, it's going to
be fantastic, they're going tolove me.
So the it comes in and I'm like,just do whatever you need to do
.
And I start talking.
But he doesn't know that I'mokay with him working on a
computer while I'm talking.
(17:22):
So he just stands there and I'mlike you can please, please,
keep going.
And then I see a camera, whichis my camera, but I forgot to
turn it on.
I'm like you can please, please, keep going.
And then I see a camera, whichis my camera, but I forgot to
turn it on.
I'm like great, I'm not goingto have a recording of this
Fantastic, let's just keep going.
So I'm talking and then aboutsix minutes in.
I don't know what he did.
(17:42):
He switched computers, hetransferred the presentations.
He does it and it goes online.
I swear all of us startedlaughing and clapping.
I was like, oh my goodness,thank you that I have a gift of
talking, because that sixminutes would have been very
challenging and someone elsewould have been sitting there
(18:02):
sweating ran off the stage.
I mean, it was me imagining it'sgoing to go great and I just
kept reminding myself it's goingto go great, it's going to be
great, and I forgot that therewas a music piece at the very
beginning.
So I click and the music comeson very loud and people are like
what is happening?
I'm like fantastic.
So now we all can sing.
(18:23):
I'm like what the heck ishappening.
But I got them singing with meand then we, of course, switched
to another slide and went tothe professional.
See, life gives you a lot ofthings, but if you are assuming
it's going to be great, you justmake it work.
And it's not Say that again,life will give you a lot of
(18:46):
challenges, but if you'reassuming it's going to be great,
you are going to make it work.
Speaker 2 (18:53):
Just let that sink in for a minute.
Everybody Just let that sink in.
So I have to share really quickas we are getting ready to
start here.
I press go live because I doall my own tech.
Everybody.
I press go live.
I started getting all thesealerts and I did the same thing.
(19:15):
It's going to be great.
I've worked through stuffbefore I'm going to figure this
out and it's going to befantastic.
It's going to be fun.
Just know it's going to workout the way it's supposed to and
people are going to love you.
Just be yourself and just go.
Speaker 3 (19:31):
Yes, and you know what that imperfection at the
beginning and how I handled itit got the audience so close to
me.
They got me.
They were like, oh, thishappened to me.
I wish I don't want to be her.
I could see in their face andthey were routing for me because
they want you to do well, mostpeople want you to do well, and
(19:51):
when something is happening toyou, they're kind of feeling it
with you.
So, yes, we were more connectedand we kind of felt the pain of
technology that can play trickis because everybody went
through it.
If you think you're alone inthose things, no, you're not.
(20:12):
Yeah, so anxiety is the assumedoutcome.
Very often it is your brainoverreacting and there are ways
to train your amygdala not totake over.
It does depend on your braintype.
It does depend on whatenvironment you're in.
(20:33):
And I want to tell you onething If there's an environment
that keeps triggering you intoanxiety, there's something I
took to heart from an AAtraining that I went to when I
was working with some people whoare addicted.
I wanted to know how does AA doit?
So I went through theirtrainings and there's one very
important sentence rest, howeveryou think about it.
(20:55):
But it's so important.
When you get sick in oneenvironment, you will not get
better in the same environment.
You need to be leaving the areathat keeps triggering you.
You cannot be around until youget stronger and you're ready.
People who have addictionsthey're taking out to different
areas of the world, state cityto heal and they're allowed, and
(21:21):
it's not just to go back untila year later after you finish
treatment.
You need to get stronger.
Those triggers, as we call them,those situations, that kind of
your brain associated and createcertain feelings and behaviors.
That is something you need toavoid until you get better.
And very often when you getbetter, you're like I really
(21:43):
don't want this in my life, sowhy would I go back?
Exactly, anxiety is somethingthat our brain creates with.
That is connected to lowself-esteem as well.
It is connected to fear.
But all of those are brainhealth issues.
They're not psychologicalissues.
They manifest themselves aspsychological issues that create
(22:07):
behavioral outcomes oremotional feelings or lack of
breath, you know, sweating, allof those things.
And if we can work with thebrain specifically using
specific tools, we can literallyrewire the brain so that
doesn't have power over youanymore.
Wouldn't that be great.
Speaker 2 (22:28):
And go into that.
Please Go into that deeper.
So I know it's a plethora ofinformation, but just just talk
about some of the let's go withanxiety specifically, Some of
the things that are happening inyour brain that you have to
work with.
Speaker 3 (22:44):
Okay.
So first of all, we're going tostart with the brain, as it's
an organ, it's a biologicalorgan in your body, like your
heart, like your liver, likeyour stomach.
So if you're prone to anxiety,stress and depression, you're
going to go and get your bloodwork done.
We're going to start with thebasics and you're going to check
(23:05):
ferritin, iron, magnesium andD3 levels.
I'm going to repeat thatFerritin, iron, magnesium and D3
levels.
And if you're less than 70thpercentile and now an asterisk
comes, if you have any type ofsevere illnesses, please check
(23:26):
with your doctor.
But if in general, you'rehealthy, you want to be in the
norm, in the upper norm.
So let's say, your D3 is at alevel of 40, which is in the
norm.
That's not helping your brainand your anxiety.
You need to be between 50 and70.
(23:47):
Now a doctor might not suggesttaking D3 because you're in the
norm.
Same with ferritin, iron andmagnesium.
All of these produceneurotransmitters that calm down
your nervous system.
You need that.
So that's the first step.
When we got that down, nextthing we're going to go.
Okay.
Why is my amygdala overacting?
Speaker 2 (24:10):
Can you go back one second?
Can you go to your normaldoctor and request these tests?
Speaker 3 (24:14):
Yes, you can, these are regular tests.
And they might say I don't seea reason why Be persistent.
Yes, be persistent, yes,persistent, because, um, I can
tell you a lot of stories whenDr Go, I don't see a reason why
I was like, well, I do so, we'regoing to do that, but I don't
know.
We'll find a reason.
And if they didn't find areason, I switched the doctor
because I knew something was offand mine.
(24:36):
Your doctor is a great human andhe has studied and she has
studied a lot.
But there is a reason why wespecialize in different things.
There is a reason why there'sno way anybody can know
everything about the brain ifthey don't specialize in the
brain.
There's no way a cardiologistis going to be expert on the gut
(24:58):
.
It's just that doesn't worklike this.
So your general doctor has ajob to understand the general
function of your body.
But when there's somethingspecific and you have knowledge,
you have every right toadvocate for yourself and be
persistent.
And if they don't like it,that's okay, I'll switch a
doctor.
And there was once I switcheddoctors seven times and the
(25:19):
eighth one agreed to do what Iwanted to try.
Speaker 2 (25:22):
Yeah, and I'm going to just add to it you know, it
is your health, you know if yourdoctor is not team you.
I agree, like you're sayingfind, find one, that is.
Speaker 3 (25:34):
And you know there are different trainings,
different perspectives andthey're also human right.
It's like for years and yearsfor women that are veterans
especially.
You know we were told thathormonal replacement therapy
creates breast cancer.
We have abolished that 50,000times already with science and
yet there are still doctors whogo.
(25:55):
Well, I wouldn't recommend HRTbecause it changes your
psychology and you can getcancer.
That's absolute BS.
Your brain, your anxiety, isconnected to your hormones,
right?
So that's another thing we needto check If you're in
perimenopause.
Guess what it comes with theperimenopause time anxiety,
depression and stress.
And it's not you, it is yourhormones going haywire.
(26:19):
There are ways to fix this.
Go to the right doctor.
But it's so important not toseparate psychology from biology
.
That's why I say I hackpsychology with biology, because
when your biology works right,it's easier for your brain to
take care of those connectionsthat it created unknowingly and
create new behaviors.
(26:41):
I mean, imagine how difficultit is to be a great husband If
you're constantly in pain andyou have phantom pains and
you're living with constant pain.
Everybody's expecting you to beloving and caring and not
snappy.
Well, try living with constantpain, right.
Speaker 1 (26:58):
Right.
Speaker 3 (26:59):
So that biology is an important step in coaching and
getting better.
So get that right.
And then let's look at yourbrain.
Maybe we need to scan yourbrain, Dr Amen.
Maybe you just need anassessment that brain coaches
have and we see which brain typeyou have, because you might be
prone to anxiety.
But the beautiful thing aboutthe brain is the science of
(27:21):
neuroplasticity.
Your brain is not.
It's the way it is, but you canchange it.
That's the beauty ofneuroplasticity.
And there's no end age.
That's BS that you cannot teachto all dog new tricks.
Speaker 2 (27:34):
Absolutely, you definitely can, and we've got a
couple of minutes left.
If we can, can we just touchbase a little bit more on what
you're talking about with thedifferent chemicals or, I'm
sorry, nutrients?
We talked about you knowmagnesium and those kinds of
things.
Is there anything else you wantto leave with on that stuff?
That's important for us to getthe test done, all that stuff.
But what to where to go fromthere?
Speaker 3 (27:59):
You got the test done , let's just go there well, you
got the test done and you knowwhat levels you need to achieve.
So, with your doctor or on yourown um, make sure you upgrade
that a little pro tip that itjust showed up a few years ago
and pub med.
If you take iron every otherday, it will absorb better, so
(28:20):
don't take it every day, um, andmake sure those levels are up.
Obviously, if you're sick, youhave some issues.
Make sure you do it with yourprimary doctor, um that you
don't overdo it, because one ofthe things I want to tell you is
that overdoing on supplementsand vitamins can be hurtful as
well.
So please just don't, becausesomebody told you that d3 is
good for you, don't start starttaking D3.
(28:41):
First get your base level,check what you want.
Speaker 2 (28:45):
I'm so glad you said that because we are our society,
or the stigma is, we don't haveenough.
We're getting just bombarded onevery platform social media et
cetera that, oh, you need totake this.
No, you take this.
No, you take this.
And no, that's not right.
Speaker 3 (29:01):
You take this, you know, so you know find out what
you really need, always startwith blood work.
You need to know what your bodyhas and then, according to this
, don't run out.
I had a lady who came to me andshe had some anxiety and she
had a lot of stress levels andshe would be forgetful.
So one of the things we do welook at not as medical
(29:24):
professionals but, just to youknow, have an oversight of what
that person is taking.
She was taking eightsupplements with vitamin B and
her B was through the roof andshe goes maybe I need vitamin B
shots.
So I'm looking at her, I'm like, look, I'm not a doctor, but
you're 400 over the norm.
I don't think you need vitaminB shots.
(29:45):
I think you need to go to adoctor because I don't know how
to deal with, you know, overextension of vitamin B, right?
Speaker 2 (29:52):
Right.
Speaker 3 (29:54):
Check before you decide on your health.
Don't buy like a crazy person.
Speaker 2 (30:01):
And I've done it.
I'm owning it.
I've done it and I take.
I do not take nearly what Iused to.
It is just so dramaticallydifferent.
I mean, literally, you'reputting all this stuff in your
body and it doesn't need it inthe first place.
Speaker 3 (30:14):
And too much is not good either.
It's like I'm going to just saycause we're adults, right, we,
most people love sex, but, um,having sex 12 times a day
probably is not a good idea.
You will not love it as muchand it's not good for your body.
I've known cases like this.
They ended up in hospitals andwe're not going to talk about
(30:34):
that right now, right, but it'sa way.
People anxiety Isn't thatinteresting, so absolutely.
Speaker 2 (30:43):
Hey, so we're over time.
So, with that said, how dopeople reach you?
Speaker 3 (30:47):
Well, you can find me on your brain coach D, on
Instagram, linkedin, facebookand everywhere else.
You can also reach out to me tocontact at your brain coach D
dot com.
You can find me under my firstand last name on Facebook and
LinkedIn.
I am happy to support you asyour trainer, coach or a speaker
(31:07):
.
I love seeing the aha momentsand making the world a better
place with the knowledge we havewith neuroscience.
So you can use it and just makeyour life the way you want to,
absolutely.
Speaker 2 (31:20):
Fantastic.
So, with that said, the lastpart, three tips to get veterans
and their families further past.
Speaker 3 (31:29):
Be aware of your baseline.
Number two understand whereyour feelings come from and if
you don't know how, get a coach,trainer, therapist or whoever
else.
Understand the process.
Number three who you are untilnow has nothing to do with what
you want to be, because yourbrain created that without you
(31:53):
Now knowing what you know, nowyou have a choice of taking life
into your hands and becoming abetter leader, better mother,
better husband, better friend,happier human.
Or you can just say I don'tknow what to do and play the
victim role.
Speaker 2 (32:13):
And our society is so wrapped with that.
Hey, let's do the other andmove forward, shall we?
Let's be the difference.
I love it, absolutely love it.
Thank you so much, my dearfriend.
Time is the most preciousresource we have as human beings
.
We don't get it back.
Thank you for being on againand just giving us real
(32:34):
information, not only withscience, but also with some fun.
So, thank you, reallyappreciate it.
Speaker 3 (32:39):
Thank you so much.
It was my pleasure, and thankyou for giving me your time.
Speaker 2 (32:41):
Oh, absolutely All right, we're out of here
everybody.
Speaker 1 (32:47):
Thank you for joining us on another insightful
journey of your Thoughts yourReality podcast with your host,
michael Cole.
We hope the conversationsparked some thoughts that
resonate with you.
To dive deeper into empoweringyour thoughts and enhancing your
reality, visitempowerperformancestrategiescom.
Remember your thoughts shapeyour reality, so make them count
(33:09):
.
Until next time, stay inspiredand keep creating the reality
you desire.
Catch you on the next episode.
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