SummerWeen Slamdown with special guest Brandon Starocci and Laurie Calcaterra and a surprise guest Judge | Zombie Book Club Ep 110 - Zombie Book Club

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:20):
Welcome to Zombie Book Club, the only book club
where the book is a bare knucklebrawl between two comic
creators.
I'm Dan, and when I'm notheckling fistfights from the
sidelines, I'm writing a bookabout the zombie apocalypse that
sometimes feels like anemotional beatdown.

Speaker 2 (00:40):
Oh yes, and I'm Leah.
And today's episode is theSummerween Slamdown, where
undead comic creators, laurieCalcaterra and Brandon Starocki
face off Crowns and mustaches,hang in the balance and a
surprise special guest judgecrashes the party and only one
of them will survive the shade.
But first, as an opener, weactually have an author pitch
today, dan.
Oh yeah, an opening act, somemight say, to the main event,
the main battle, the main fight.

Speaker 1 (00:58):
Yeah, my brain's not working.

Speaker 2 (01:01):
Yeah, we're recording this after the um, the brawl,
the beatdown that just occurred,and it was an experience.

Speaker 1 (01:11):
Uh, speaking of uh content warning.
Uh, in this episode there'sjokes about being children of
divorce, and the battle getsintense.
Very intense and may inspiresome trauma if you've been
through divorce.
But hang in there, just likethat poster of a cat hanging off

(01:32):
of a branch.
Hang in there Because there's ahappy ending to the story.
I hope that's not a spoiler.

Speaker 2 (01:39):
You know, if you made it through divorce with your
parents, you can make it throughthis episode.
But seriously, if it issomething that would be too hard
to listen to totally understand, uh, but just remember that
this is not um.
This was a frenemy situation,emphasis on the friend part of
the frenemy between laurie andbrandon.

(02:01):
But you'll have to listen to itto get the rest of the details.
First, as an opening act, wehave an author pitch from our
Zomvesti R Cuthbertson about hernewly released book Waves of
Undead.
I've been really lookingforward to this book for a while
.
It's going to be one of ourwinter reads, Dan.

Speaker 1 (02:17):
Yeah, surfing and zombies.
Yeah, let's hear more about it.

Speaker 2 (02:22):
Let's hear it.
I want to know more what.
And zombies?
Yeah, let's hear more about it.
Let's hear it.
What floor should we go to tolisten to this?

Speaker 1 (02:26):
author pitch oh sea level.

Speaker 2 (02:28):
So right down to the basement.

Speaker 1 (02:30):
Yeah, floor zero.

Speaker 2 (02:31):
Okay, let's hear what you got, arkoth.

Speaker 3 (02:33):
Britson, are you ready to dive into your next
summer?
Read Waves of Undead hassurfing.
It has zombies.
It has surfing zombies.
No, no, it has surfing zombies.
No, no, there's no surfingzombies.
The prologue does, however, kickoff with surfing of a tsunami.
When a tsunami and a zombieoutbreak strike simultaneously,
what lengths must one go to inorder to survive twins, paul and

(02:57):
anna zeus, and fight for theirlives when they encounter people
who are violent andcannibalistic the undead.
At the end of the road alongthe 49th parallel sits the
remote town of Tofino, asurfer's paradise in the Pacific
Northwest.
Anna travels to this idyllicbeach town hoping to rekindle a
romantic relationship.
When horror and disaster strike, paul learns his sister is on

(03:19):
Vancouver Island where civiliansare being warned of an
encroaching tsunami.
Will Paul find a way to get hissister to safety despite the
impending apocalypse?
Waves of Undead is book one inthe Undead Waters series, which
will consist of three novels andtwo novellas written by me, r
Cuthbertson, but you can call meRebecca Fast-paced, multi-point

(03:40):
of view and action-packed.
Early readers have describedWaves of Undead as hard to put
down and well-fleshed out Funnycomment for a zombie novel.
Signed copies and book bundleswhich include a bookmark.
A mysterious vial postcard, asurfing zombie sticker and
signed zombie portrait of yourstruly can be found on my website

(04:00):
at rcuthbertsonwritescom.
Ebooks are available on Kindleand Kindle Unlimited Paperback
copies are also available onAmazon.
I love connecting with fellowmembers of the zombie community,
so feel free to reach out to meon Instagram or TikTok at
rcuthbertsonwrites.
Surfing Zombies Tsunami.

(04:21):
This is phase one of theoutbreak.
Are you ready?

Speaker 2 (04:24):
Happy readings on besties.
Oh, rebecca, now I canofficially call you rebecca,
yeah thanks for that I amterrified of the concept of
tsunami, a tsunami of fuckingzombies.
Well, what if you're really?

Speaker 1 (04:35):
good at surfing, though I'm not I I I always
wanted to learn how to surf,like when I was a kid, because I
did snowboarding and stuff, andI'm like, how come I've never
been surfing?
And then the the easiest answeris because I don't live near an
ocean.

Speaker 2 (04:49):
Yeah, me neither.
We were inlanders growing up.

Speaker 1 (04:53):
It's unfair that I'm not a surfer boy.

Speaker 2 (04:56):
It's never too late, dan, I think it is.
Regardless, this book soundslike quite a thrill ride.
I love the creative take on it.
It makes me think about when Igot to go to hawaii many years
ago um, on oahu, the north shoreand I watched people surf for
the first time on those hugewaves.
And now I'm picturing zombiesas a part of the waves.

Speaker 1 (05:17):
And that's not even like tsunami level wave, that's
yeah the north shore is no jokeyeah a friend of mine decided to
also surf for the first time inthe North Shore and almost died
.

Speaker 2 (05:27):
What?
That's a bad idea.

Speaker 1 (05:29):
Yeah, two of them went out and they both had to
save each other.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (05:33):
Rebecca's not only an excellent author, she also does
some very great zombie cosplay.
Is that the right word?

Speaker 1 (05:39):
I'm thinking of oh yeah, yes, like dressing up as a
zombie.

Speaker 2 (05:42):
Yes, and I love following her because she also
shares these very funny clipsfrom her life, like recently, I
learned that her writing stationis inside of a playpen.

Speaker 1 (05:49):
What yeah?
So the person who wrote a bookabout surfing away from a
tsunami of dead people alsowrites inside of a playpen.

Speaker 2 (06:02):
They do, turns out.
It keeps the babies and thedogs out, so it works out really
nicely so.

Speaker 1 (06:07):
the playpen, the thing designed to keep babies
inside, is what what they use tokeep the babies away.

Speaker 2 (06:14):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (06:14):
Okay, I just wanted to make sure.

Speaker 2 (06:16):
You can find that out and more If you follow Rebecca
at our Cuthbertson dot writes onInstagram.
Super fun to follow and we willdefinitely be having her on the
show sometime this winter,because I think when we're all
feeling the winter blues, I'mgoing to want to imagine a
tsunami of zombies.
Oh yeah.

Speaker 1 (06:31):
Yeah, we're going to want to be on that beach.

Speaker 2 (06:32):
Yeah, suntanning while getting eaten.
I guess I don't know, butthanks for submitting the author
pitch.
Rebecca, we're so be a part ofthe community and super excited
to have you on the show.
And now for the main actsummerween slam down between

(06:53):
laurie calcaterra and brandonstaraki.

Speaker 1 (06:54):
Who are you rooting for?
Let us know on instagram.
Slam down showdown.

Speaker 2 (06:55):
Slam down summerween slam down welcome to the
summerween slam down.
Tonight, two fierce undeadcomic creators face off.
After years of online beef,today we have with us Lori
Calcaterra, our first everzombie-ween game show.
Queen, creator of Path of thePale Rider, hot Sauce Witch and
Fruit Smashing Martial Artist,she is here to defend her zombie

(07:19):
meat crown from her frenemy,brandon Starocki.
Brandon is the scrappy underdogof the evening with razor-sharp
wit.
He's the creator of zombiecomic Avalon and the proud owner
of a legendary mustache.
He's showing it off, brandon.
Show off the mustache, comecloser that he has vowed to
protect.
He's challenged Lori to theSummerween Slamdown for her

(07:39):
crown even after I offered tomake him his own without even
winning Zombieween.
So Even after I offered to makehim his own without even
winning Zombieween.
So that's a real beef.
If he loses, he's going to haveto depart with that mustache
completely and I believe youwant it mailed to you, lori, is
that right?
Sure, okay, I'm your host, leahhere to guide you through all
the action, and Dan is here asour official heckler.

Speaker 1 (07:58):
Wake me up when the show starts.

Speaker 6 (08:02):
Welcome officially Lori and Brandonon how are you
two doing great?

Speaker 4 (08:05):
oh, you know except for laurie we're good, I'm good,
you're ready all is good.

Speaker 1 (08:10):
Are you ready to tear each other's guts out for our
entertainment?

Speaker 4 (08:14):
yes, I think, yes, I was born ready I was gonna say
that comes naturally to brandon,I think, tearing guts or
getting ripped, them ripped out.
He just likes to tear things up, perfect.

Speaker 1 (08:26):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (08:26):
Could you explain, for those who have not been
following your online beef, howthis all started?
Go ahead, brandon.

Speaker 6 (08:33):
You too.
So we went to the Living Deadweekend and really was the call
out day, but you know, there wasa couple zombie ween episodes
that I was unable to attend.
And uh, lori wins this fakecrown championship because the
real champion wasn't there me,um.

(08:54):
So basically it's a phonychampionship crown she has right
now and I'm here now in frontof her to obtain and really
honestly defend the crown,because I'm actually the
champion so I called her out atthe zombie or the living dead
weekend and, um, I told her shedidn't accept.

(09:16):
She was a coward.
So I'm I'm personally shockedthat she did accept it.
So she isn't as much as Ithought she was, but she still
is a a bit of a coward to me andit's not going to, it's not
going to be well for her in thisepisode.

Speaker 2 (09:28):
Laurie, what do you have to say to that?

Speaker 4 (09:29):
First of all, we were supposed to tell the story and
you just went right into insults.
What the hell Like?
You didn't actually tell peoplethat.
You know, we started writingcomic books around the same time
and that's how we met, and it'sbeen a long journey supporting

(09:52):
each other's colleagues.
And then, no, no, my time totalk.
You already spoke my time, um,and then you just came up with
this beef out of nowhere.
It is not my fault that youwere not able to come to the
zombie one or zombie wing two.
Whose fault is that your fault?
Who won?
Fair and square, I did, I did,thank you you won a phony, you
started this you started

Speaker 6 (10:08):
this uh-uh, no, no, I won continuing it on without me
, the, the actual champion.

Speaker 4 (10:15):
You would have showed up the second year, you, you
didn't well, I'm well, we'rehere now.

Speaker 2 (10:21):
We're here now chicken, chicken here we are
better late than never yeah, andI I know that some of us are
very excited for this beefshowdown and other people have
described it as like theirparents getting divorced and
having to pick a parent.

Speaker 4 (10:35):
So you're traumatizing the whole community
look what you're doing, brandonplaying with people's emotions
like that uh, laurie, why didyou respond to brandon's
challenge?

Speaker 2 (10:45):
yes, but I want your mustache Because he called me a
coward.
So that's a.

Speaker 4 (10:50):
No one calls me a coward Mustache.
I mean I had to raise thestakes Because, yeah, I mean if
I win I keep what I already won.
But I mean, like I needsomething dear to Brandon to be,
you know, up the stakes.
So we both know that him andthat mustache am I right?
It's the mustache, right.

Speaker 6 (11:09):
It goes a long way.
I have yet to find a clipperthat could even cut this
beautiful mustache off.
Don't worry, I got one.
It's not going to be impossibleat all.
It's impossible for you to winand it's impossible for any
shears to even cut this thingoff.
I got one.
I got one right here.
It's impossible for you to winand it's impossible for any
shears to even cut this thingoff.

Speaker 1 (11:28):
You know I have a question, laurie, about
Brandon's mustache, especiallysince he brings up the problem
with the shears not being ableto pierce his mustache strands.
I was wondering first, howwould you like this mustache to
be delivered?
Should it be delivered intact?
Do you want it in a small?

Speaker 6 (11:50):
jar.
This is all in theory, thatshe's going to win.
She ain't winning.

Speaker 1 (11:54):
This isn't even a conversation to be had and also
follow up question If you wantthe mustache intact, do you want
it to be waxed off?
Since it cannot be, oh, Ibrought clippers.

Speaker 4 (12:05):
I mean Brandon, that could work it ain't going to
work.

Speaker 6 (12:09):
It can't work.

Speaker 4 (12:10):
The problem is that Dan and I?
I think waxing could work too.
I think Dan is correct.

Speaker 1 (12:16):
I think that waxing should be.
You could frame that mustache,you would always have it.

Speaker 4 (12:20):
I think it needs to be live, I think you need to
record it, the whole A lot.

Speaker 2 (12:25):
Is it self-waxing?
Because I think that's theultimate torture.

Speaker 4 (12:30):
Does your wife?
Does she have waxing stuff, ordo you need to actually go to a
place to have it?

Speaker 6 (12:33):
waxed Again.
I bring the point up.
We're talking as if this isalready lost.
It's not happening, it can'thappen, it won't happen.
I'm here to win and only to win.

Speaker 4 (12:42):
Well, that's not up to me and Dan, you have no idea,
what you have awoken.

Speaker 2 (12:46):
Lori, lori, yes, calm down, your time to fight is
coming.

Speaker 7 (12:51):
But first we have to say hello to Sylvester.

Speaker 2 (12:54):
Barzee, because Dan and I cannot judge this.

Speaker 8 (12:57):
Hi, this has arrived.
I am here to judge, as yourroyal leader and whatnot, to see
this showdown go down andhopefully we see a lot of blood,
a lot of personal attacks.

Speaker 2 (13:11):
Oh she's got a crown too.
It's already started, sylvester.

Speaker 6 (13:16):
It's a fake crown.
It's a fake crown.

Speaker 4 (13:20):
Oh, it's not a fake crown, it's the first crown.

Speaker 2 (13:24):
Look at that evil eye peeking through the universe.

Speaker 4 (13:28):
Let me see if I can turn off my background here.

Speaker 8 (13:32):
So I am excited about this.
I want to see how this allplays out.

Speaker 2 (13:37):
Well, we're really glad you're here, Sylvester,
because Dan and I cannot choose.
We love Brandon and Loriequally.
The mustache is on in bothsolidarity for brandon, but also
the possibility of it beingvery humorous that I get to take
it off if you lose.

Speaker 6 (13:50):
Sorry, brandon and yeah, I agree.
So she was saying team brandonyeah, everybody's got a stash
right now.

Speaker 4 (13:56):
This is perfect.

Speaker 1 (13:57):
Mine's in mockery we also realized that in in a in a
battle for the royal crown ofzombie ween, we couldn't judge
because we are not royal peers.
Only a winner of zombie weencould judge who is deserving to

(14:17):
wear the crown of zombie weenthis is for her crown and not
mine, right?

Speaker 4 (14:22):
correct.
You get to keep your crown.
You get to keep your crown, Iget to keep my crown.
Brandon gets to shave off hismustache and cry in the corner.
That's what's going to happen.

Speaker 8 (14:31):
You have to shave.

Speaker 4 (14:32):
He's yeah, I mean like, come on, we had to up the
stakes, right Wax.

Speaker 6 (14:37):
It's not happening.
You got to understand it's nothappening.
You can just mail that littlewax like dan is a great.
Thank you for holding my crownand keeping it safe for me,
because it's coming to erie soonI'm gonna frame it and put it
on my wall.

Speaker 2 (14:49):
Okay, laurie, okay, brandon, calm down, you're it's
almost, it's almost ready tofight, but you gotta, you gotta,
you gotta get your breathing infirst.
Right, and I need to introduceofficially the 2024 zombie ween
king and horror author,sylvester bar, coming from the
infected depths of deep space,hell, and our official judge for
this event, as you have alreadysaid, because he is the king of

(15:11):
this realm of Zombieween andour final authority.
Sylvester is a Bronx-bornmilitary veteran who is an
award-winning zombie and horrorauthor who shines a spotlight on
BIPOC characters in his books.
Sylvester, how did you feelwhen we said we need you to
judge this?

Speaker 8 (15:27):
I felt so amazing because you know my family left
me today, so not left they justwent to the store.

Speaker 1 (15:36):
They'll be back.

Speaker 8 (15:38):
So, they say yeah.
So I'm excited, I want to seethis.
I've seen the trash talk, I'veseen the back and forth, I've
read the mythos and the lore, soI'm ready.

Speaker 2 (15:48):
You're ready.
Well, what's the criteriayou're going to use to judge,
because you have completecontrol over what is decided
here today.

Speaker 8 (15:54):
I'm working on vibes.

Speaker 2 (15:56):
Not going to give them any clues.

Speaker 8 (15:58):
Oh, I have no clue myself, so we'll find out.

Speaker 1 (16:05):
So it's simple, all you have to do is please,
sylvester.

Speaker 2 (16:06):
Well, I think we need to dive in, because I can tell
Brandon and Laura you arechomping at the bit to just kick
each other's ass.
Somebody's going to win here.
So here's my, my criteria.
You can take it or leave it,sylvester, but what we're going
to do now is Laurie and Brandonare going to face off in a
series of wild, undead themedchallenges designed to test
their zombie skills, zeal,outrageousness, menace, bangers,

(16:29):
intensity and edge.
They'll make their openingarguments, roast each other and
then tackle some pretty typical,but with a twist, zombie ween,
survival questions, and thenthey're going to make their
finale speeches to finally, like, clinch the win for you,
sylvester, so you can kind oflet people know where you're
leaning through each round.
But it's your choice at the veryend, who you want to have.

(16:50):
Win, um, and there are noground rules.
Normally, I have ground rules.
There are none, just whateveryou want, you can.
You can play as dirty as youlike in this game.
Are you ready?

Speaker 6 (17:02):
oh yeah, yes, I'm ready to get this crown to here,
so I in this game.

Speaker 2 (17:06):
Are you ready?
Oh yeah, I'm ready to get thiscrown.
So I asked you both to prepareopening statements for Sylvester
about why you should winBrandon as the underdog here.
I'd like you to start.
Why should you claim the crown?

Speaker 6 (17:17):
So it's as simple as this, number one my car's not
inspected, my taillight's out,my hairline is falling out.
It's about time I win something.
I give mother something to beproud about her son.
So we're here, we're going totake down Lori, this phony
champion.
She's going to next day airthis thing.
I want this thing here tomorrow.
And it's as simple as that.

Speaker 2 (17:39):
That's a strong starting statement.
That's it.
That's all you got your weakhairline.

Speaker 4 (17:43):
It is what it?

Speaker 6 (17:43):
is.
You know we're here to.
I'm here to get dirty.
Start fighting.
Get this crown here, right nextto my desk, right here, so I
can just show it off at alltimes Period.

Speaker 2 (17:56):
Mustache dropped.
Laurie, you sent me a video foryour opening.
I did, would you?

Speaker 4 (18:00):
like me to go and play that I've been preparing
for this.

Speaker 5 (18:06):
This is Lori's opening statement.
Bow down and give reverence toLori Calcatero the House
Calcatero the first of her name,the original zombie-weaned
queen, drinker of tears, smasherof fruit, khaleesi of the
kitchen, countess ofcliffhangers, emp Emotions and
Mother of Assassins.

Speaker 4 (18:25):
Anywho, I will just say my reasoning that I should
win is because one I actuallywon the first round of
Zombieween game show.
I was there.
Brandon was not and in fact hewas invited and he just didn't
show that day because we allthought he was going to be there

(18:46):
and he just did not show up.
He was invited for the secondtime when Sylvester and I got to
, you know butt heads and go forthe crown, and you won.
Brandon could have been thereand he was not.
So why should Brandon get ashot at the crown that I
rightfully won the first year ifhe couldn't even bother to show

(19:09):
up and contest with everybody?
That's loser.
Talk in it to show up.
I know he's sleeping becausehe's old and can't, you know,
think.

Speaker 6 (19:20):
Oh, you're still talking.
Yeah, because I actually havesomething poignant to say.

Speaker 4 (19:24):
I know you don't out when something important happens
, like you don't show up to thezombie ween contest like
everybody else does.

Speaker 6 (19:31):
Hey, it is what it is .
You know, wasn't there, Me inmy absence not being there, that
first official kind of showjust proved that it was a phony
thing from the get-go.
You know, it was just like apity win for you.

Speaker 4 (19:45):
I'm sorry.
Did you just insult Dan andLeah?
Did you just insult Dan andLeah?
That's all in the past rightnow, Because that's what it
sounds like to me.

Speaker 2 (19:51):
Is that you called the show?

Speaker 4 (19:53):
phony, because you weren't there.
So that means that everybodyelse that was involved is also
phony, that's rude.

Speaker 6 (20:00):
Do you even listen to the words that come out of your
mouth?
The real challenger here wasBrandon.
You know we'll just give it toLori.
There's not much we can doabout it.
It is what it is.
I'm here now to get back thecrown that was right through my
Do you even listen to the show?

Speaker 4 (20:12):
Because it sounds like you didn't even listen.
Do you listen to the podcast?
Do you listen to the episodes?
Oh, all the time, because,because, it sounds like you
don't go back and listen to themeither.

Speaker 6 (20:23):
Oh, 100% yeah.

Speaker 2 (20:25):
It is what it is.

Speaker 6 (20:26):
We're here now it's done.

Speaker 2 (20:28):
Sylvester, where are you leaning from this intro?

Speaker 8 (20:30):
These opening statements are pretty strong
right now.
At first I was leaning towardsBrandon, because you know I feel
sorry about your hairline andthat hurts, so I was leaning
towards you.
But I did get to see the videoand I I do love the video, so I
could have thought, oh, oh, okaynow.

(20:50):
Now I'm on the fence, all right, I'm just waiting.

Speaker 1 (20:53):
Yeah we'll see okay we didn't know how bad it's from
winner to winner, I meansylvester, you understand that
there was work involved inbecoming the champion, right?

Speaker 4 (21:05):
very true there was a contest and you worked your
butt off and that was me on bothyears.
In the first year I did win,and so for brandon to show up
and just challenge me directly,that's cheating well, it's not.

Speaker 6 (21:19):
It sounds like it.
You know, it's a victimmentality, you, okay, okay, okay
, I'm timing out Time, out Time.
Brandon Storocki, that was theonly thing you got.

Speaker 2 (21:30):
It is time for us to begin our zombie wing questions.
Yeah, now it begins.
Yes, where pain is the spice oflife.
I asked you both to get yourhot sauce.
You're ready.
I need each of you to take aspoonful of hot sauce and while
you're taking it, I want you tocontemplate your answer to this
question.
First person to have an answercan just start.
If you could invent gottalisten.

Speaker 6 (21:53):
If you could invent and Laurie, you're gonna do a
big.
You're gonna do a real shot ofhot sauce.
You're not gonna do some fakestuff.
Did you switch that out withjust mango sauce?
Is it real hot sauce?

Speaker 4 (22:03):
shut up, brandon Leo was talking real.

Speaker 2 (22:05):
You interrupted leo stop interrupting, leo, true if
you could invent a brand newzombie mutation, what would it
look like and how would it killyour opponent?

Speaker 6 (22:17):
we take the shot.

Speaker 2 (22:17):
First the shot and then you can think about an
answer.
What would this new zombiemutation look like and how would
it kill your opponent?

Speaker 8 (22:23):
my acid reflux.

Speaker 6 (22:24):
look, look, we're talking, we're talking, uh,
getting stuff out there whereit's like you're, you're making
things fear.
You know you're making the darkfearful again.
You know everybody has thatfear of the dark.
So these things are going to belurking in the dark and
hibernating in the dark.
So at any moment you're doingthis, it's a it almost seems
like a horror film.
It's spooky, it's scary.

(22:44):
Every time you look into a room, these things are going to be
menacing and phantom-like.
Where it's not even zombie-like, it is a zombie, but it happens
so quick.
You walk up, you go to getpackages or scavenge a house and
all that stuff.
It's pitch black.
You go up there and then, boom,it's almost like a Batman kind
of horrorist kind of thing.
Make them spooky, make them,make zombies scary again,

(23:05):
especially adding the element offear with the dark.

Speaker 1 (23:08):
Make zombies scary, so they're phantoms.

Speaker 6 (23:12):
What are they?
They're zombies.

Speaker 4 (23:14):
So you didn't answer the question, okay.

Speaker 6 (23:16):
They move within the phantom.
You know they're phantom-like.

Speaker 4 (23:19):
That's not what the question was.
Yeah, what was the question.
My turn.
The question was yeah, what'sthe question?
My turn.
The question was what newzombie mutation would you invent
and how would they kill people?
So my new zombie mutation wouldbe this virus that makes
people's skin and bodies gotogether so they become this
massive, almost like a rat king.

(23:39):
They suck you in, so if theytouch, you get absorbed, like
your skin connects and you, likeyou, become one massive ball.
That would be great because youcan have like a zombie ball
just run over people and nowyou're a part of the mass.

Speaker 6 (23:54):
I mean it's cute, it's been done many times before
, it's not anything.
Original Name one Name one.
The Last of Us.
You're talking Resident Evil,you're talking about all these
things.
Yeah, of course I'm talkingabout.
She's talking about mutation,where you're coming into a rat
king kind of bot.

Speaker 8 (24:09):
We've already seen that it's not like you didn't
even suggest a mutation Brandon.
It is something like that in ZNation.

Speaker 4 (24:16):
Right, exactly, I have not seen Z Nation.

Speaker 8 (24:19):
Yeah, been there done that, they have this ball of
zombies.

Speaker 5 (24:27):
That's cool I haven't seen it.

Speaker 4 (24:28):
That's a giant wheel.
I was just thinking like, do webelieve, lori?
You haven't seen it.
But I mean, what's it?
We've seen it before.
I'm sorry, I have a life and Istay busy.
No, now you're a zombie personbut you don't.

Speaker 6 (24:42):
But you don't watch a zombie show, okay I just
haven't seen some of the newones because I'm too busy
writing.

Speaker 4 (24:48):
Shut up for a second.
This is going to be a long show.

Speaker 8 (24:51):
No one's gonna be able to hear anything we say I
mean I want to watch one episodeof uh dead city, so I'm not.
I don't feel like you have towatch everything.

Speaker 4 (24:59):
You can't really force I don't have enough time.
I'm too busy trying to producemy book.

Speaker 2 (25:04):
Dead City is terrible anyway, so you don't have to
listen to that.

Speaker 8 (25:07):
I was hoping that it still was Part of me.
Inside was like what if it isgood?
And I'm missing out.

Speaker 1 (25:13):
But thank you they also have a Rat King zombie.

Speaker 2 (25:15):
They do we're going to move on to our next question.

Speaker 5 (25:20):
Very original, Rory.

Speaker 1 (25:21):
We're going to move on to our next question.

Speaker 6 (25:29):
You didn't even answer the question.
Brandon shut up.
Yeah, I said, I said phantom,like you know you're making,
you're adding a fear element toit.

Speaker 2 (25:32):
Anyone who's actually had parental trauma of a lot of
yelling may be deeply triggeredby this episode.

Speaker 8 (25:35):
As I am currently this is really intense I'm like
on the verge of tears breathe.
You're gonna be hurt, hurt.
I feel uncomfortable, but it'sgood.

Speaker 1 (25:47):
Take a breath, eat some more hot sauce and let's
move on.

Speaker 2 (25:52):
Welcome.
We're in a new era.
We are well into the apocalypsenow and, sylvester, you have a
Planet Dead pawn shop in thisworld.
You are both going to go intogether.
I'm going to give you secretly,via the chat, uh, three secret
items, and sylvester you.
I will also tell you how manybottle caps you have to spend.

(26:13):
Uh, you can pitch roast charminto.
Well, you know, I'm not goingto say interrupt.
Let's try not to interrupt eachother.
Maybe that's my one rule, uh,to convince Sylvester to buy
your stuff.
Whoever gets the most ofSylvester's bottle caps wins.
So just one moment, I'm goingto DM you all your secret items

(26:33):
that you need to convinceSylvester to purchase.

Speaker 8 (26:35):
Welcome to the Ringmaster Pawn Shop.
We buy and steal everything, sogo ahead.
What do you got?

Speaker 4 (26:43):
I will go first as a lady.
Ladies first, oh, I love thisshop.
Look at how many interestingthings you have, and how do you
keep it smelling so nice?
Is that apple pie, cinnamon?
Yeah, I'm really impressed that, even in the apocalypse, that
your store is so uh well keptand smells nice.

(27:06):
Now I, I too, am a traveler inthis apocalypse and, sir, um, I
have some wares that you mightbe interested in.
Definitely can help the, uh,the person looking to trade and
uh, protect themselves here inthe apocalypse.
We have zombie problems, youknow, um, let me interest you in
what I have.
So first let me put it all outon the table for you, and I'm

(27:29):
going to put down sevenhamburger shaped squeaky dog
toys.
A burnt out lava lamp okay and arelatively fresh dead mouse
just freshly caught.
Okay, so let's talk about thesebecause you see, with these
squeakies I can help you withyour zombie detection.
These are a great indicatorthat someone is walking around

(27:50):
in an area they're not supposedto be.
Slip it under a rug at the door, put it in between the door jam
at the top.
Maybe put it in therefrigerator to stop those kids
from sneaking some food whenthey're not supposed to.
And it's so great that we haveseven, because the opportunity
is endless, because we all needto keep prepared in the
apocalypse.

(28:11):
But let's move on to the nextone, this lava lamp.
Now we don't really need lamps,no more.
But did you know what's insideof a lava lamp?
Lava Wax.
The lava is wax, so you canmake candles, you can seal
cheese and food Wax is a lot ofuses.
And then you could use the emptycontainer to store water or

(28:33):
food or whatever you like.
So there's lots of components.
And if you're a scavenger andyou like to tinker, there's all
the electrical components insidethat you know can be whatever
fancy you're looking for.
And finally, finally, of course, I myself have just trapped
this fresh mouse.
Whether you choose to consumefresh mouse or use it as bait,

(28:54):
completely up to you, could beused for either, and the pelt
can make like a nice littlelovey for a child.
You know how we have a rabbit'sfoot you could have.
You know a child, you know howwe have a rabbit's foot you
could have.
You know, just something tosoothe.
So that is what I bring to you,my friend um, lots, lots of
things that could definitelyhelp you in the apocalypse.
You let me know what you'reinterested in absolutely, that

(29:16):
was definitely a good pitch.

Speaker 8 (29:18):
I was a bit skeptical at first, but you, you've
convinced me, brandon.
What do you have?

Speaker 6 (29:24):
Hey, I noticed that I'm not here to waste your time
like she was.
So I noticed that you have.
I saw kids, younger kids andall that as well, in a pool down
the street and also I noticedthat you have VHS tapes sitting
over there.
Over to the right, I have herean inflatable unicorn pool float
for the kids.

(29:44):
Really kind of get away fromthe chaos that's going on in the
world.
Right, you know, let's start tojust settle down, use kind of
like a picnic thing.
You know, I'm assuming you guysdo picnics, picnics in this
small town and all that goodstuff as well.
I got an inflatable unicornfloat.
Those are always cute, they're,they're nice, you know.
Get the kids, you know, havingfun in the pools.
Then I have seven vhs tapes ofspeed two, not a popular one,

(30:09):
but it's movie.
It keeps, it brings people backto what it used to be.

Speaker 8 (30:13):
We don't have to deal stuff with stuff.
All seven or speed two.

Speaker 6 (30:17):
Oh yeah, all seven yep, and I'm willing to do a
wholesale as well.
Look, I get it, it's it, it.
It's not a very good movie perse, but the best part about this
is it's cinema.
You have a VHS tape.
It looks like you have a couplestanding over there.
It allows people to get backinto what was the calm reality.
Grab popcorn, if you have it,just sit back, hang out with the

(30:38):
family.
After that, you go under thepool with the unicorn floatie On
top of this.
I'm doing a real big wholesalehere today.
I got a left zombie shoe withthe zombies foot still in it.
We know people have weird thingsgoing on in their lives.
Kinks, weird kinks.
Do with it as you wish.
I'm just throwing that in thereas a bonus, you know.
But got movies, got floaties,picnic vibes.

(31:00):
You know, I saw, like I said,saw that you guys have kids here
, you guys guys have familieshere, pools and all that stuff.
But I'm not gonna waste yourtime anymore.
Whatever you want to buy, it'sall here, oh uh.
Wholesale prices are alsoavailable.

Speaker 8 (31:13):
Okay, okay.
So how does this go?
Am I buying each item?

Speaker 2 (31:17):
You can choose whatever you want with the money
you've got.

Speaker 8 (31:20):
Oh, do I give them the whole 20, or we're going to
break it down and see who wins.
I want the squeaky toys, soI'll give you seven bottle caps
for that, since there's seven ofthose.
Thank you, I like theinflatable toy.
So because it's a commodity?
Yep, yeah, it is, I come out,so let's see, so I got 13.

(31:41):
I'll give you.
You want to take six.
Six is a high come out, solet's see.
So I got 13 left.
I'll give you.
You want to take six?
Six of those that work.

Speaker 6 (31:50):
Yeah, I could take six.
Do you plan on buying the sevenVHS tapes at a wholesale price?
I can do four bottle caps forall of them or bottle cap.

Speaker 4 (31:59):
I think a much more practical item is the lava lamp,
because there's lots of useswhen you take it apart.

Speaker 6 (32:06):
You said it was burnt out.
You said it was burnt out.
Who said anything about usingit?

Speaker 4 (32:12):
as a lamp.
We explained the purposes thatyou can use the components for
it's much more practical.

Speaker 6 (32:19):
We'll let the gentleman figure it out.
You did say it was a burnt outlamp.

Speaker 8 (32:22):
it doesn't work, it's okay it is uh, right now, I
don't want the rat and I don'twant the zombie foot.
I don't really like feet.

Speaker 6 (32:32):
So so it's really going to come down between speed
and the lava lamp and and and,sir, I want I want to bring up
the point that you have VHSplayers, I see right over there.
You know you have families herethat bring back to reality.
You know I'm giving you awholesale seven of them for five

(32:54):
bottle caps with everythingwith the unicorn.
You get that as well on top ofthat, and then you know what I
mean.
You're talking 12 bottle capsfor the unicorn.
You get that as well on top ofthat, and then you know what I
mean.
You're talking 12 bottle capsfor the unicorn and the seven
VHS tapes.
And it's a done deal right here.
You don't need the boot.
I'll leave the boot out.

Speaker 4 (33:11):
The lava lamp has much more use, Can use multiple
times.
I mean you watch.

Speaker 6 (33:17):
We can get a deal done 11 bottle caps and we're
done.

Speaker 4 (33:20):
You watch it once and it's just like that.
It wasn't even good the firsttime.

Speaker 6 (33:24):
Although, oh no, it's horrible, it brings reality,
yeah, so I mean using the waxand the electrical components
and then the glass container.

Speaker 4 (33:34):
those are Really you have several items that you
could have just in this one lavalamp.

Speaker 6 (33:41):
So it's a steal at five.
Five bottle caps.
Well, I do notice you don'thave many VHS tapes as well, but
you know you have the VHSplayer.
Get the tapes.
11 bottle caps for the unicorn.

Speaker 4 (33:50):
Also, I have been very respectful this entire time
.
I did not talk down about myopponent.

Speaker 6 (33:56):
You're respectful or you're trying to sell them bad
product, but go on.

Speaker 8 (33:59):
Although I like the theme of the water and I have my
floaty, and speed two does takeplace on a boat, it doesn't
have Keanu Reeves, so we're notgoing to go with speed two.
We will get that lot for themany uses, so I'm going to award
the rest of the points to that,since I don't have.

(34:21):
Thank you For the rat, thezombie foot.

Speaker 4 (34:25):
That's okay, I can keep the rat.
It's okay, someone else canprobably eat it.
How many bottles you?

Speaker 6 (34:30):
could utilize the left.
You could utilize the left boot.
I can keep the zombie foot out.
I mean, people are always ontheir feet.
People are always doing it.

Speaker 4 (34:42):
You know, 11 total for the left boot.
You got the floating for yourkids.
He already awarded the rest ofthe bottle caps to me.

Speaker 6 (34:46):
Sorry it's over.
No, not yet.

Speaker 4 (34:47):
And then you got the seven VHS tapes.
No, it's done, Thank you, movealong.

Speaker 8 (34:53):
We'll move on to the next round, are we?
If we're keeping track of thebottle caps, let's see it was
seven.
And then what six?

Speaker 5 (35:06):
Yeah, you offered six for that Lori got 14.

Speaker 2 (35:09):
Nice.
I'm sorry, Brandon.

Speaker 1 (35:12):
You tried hard.
Something comes to mind when Ithink about it.

Speaker 8 (35:15):
That was a hard sell, brandon, it really was.

Speaker 1 (35:17):
When I think about the lava lamp is that usually
the top of the lava lamp wassealed with a bottle cap.

Speaker 8 (35:28):
Yeah, oh, oh, that's clever.

Speaker 4 (35:31):
I haven't opened one.
You had your bottle cap.

Speaker 2 (35:34):
A whole other bottle cap.

Speaker 1 (35:36):
Yeah, that's just one bottle cap laying around.

Speaker 2 (35:40):
Yeah, I would have sold the VHS tapes as building
material, Like bricks that's, Ithink a viable use.

Speaker 4 (35:48):
You could take the tape out and use it to tie
things.

Speaker 8 (35:51):
Tie up things, that's good.

Speaker 2 (35:52):
But I appreciate the family vibe.
I've never seen Speed 2, so Idon't know how bad this is.

Speaker 6 (35:57):
I would have been evil to sell it.

Speaker 2 (35:59):
That's horrible.

Speaker 6 (36:00):
I mean, you can't even make Speed 3.
They can't even sell that movie.

Speaker 2 (36:03):
Are you ready for the next question, friends?
Yes, don't forget the friendNemi, part of your frenemy.

Speaker 4 (36:11):
Brandon, don't forget .

Speaker 2 (36:13):
It's a zombie apocalypse and you and Brandon
are getting a divorce In thisworld.
You've been married.

Speaker 6 (36:26):
You have kids.
Sylvester is one of them, so isthe already don't like this
question so you don't want toget divorced.
I was married to sylvesterbecause he was the judge.
I was like for the sake of thisquestion.

Speaker 2 (36:31):
You two are married.
It's the apocalypse.
You don't actually have to gothrough the the paperwork of a
divorce, right?
You're just like I'm, I'm.
I'm done with you.
However, you have Sylvester andthe rest of the audience.
They're your children,sylvester, embody your best
12-year-old self here, and youhave to convince Sylvester and
the audience to choose you asthe parent to go with into the

(36:52):
wasteland Might as well, wouldyou like to?

Speaker 4 (36:54):
Oh, you would like me to go first again.

Speaker 6 (36:57):
Yeah, yeah, go ahead honey.

Speaker 4 (36:58):
Okay, sylvester darling, this is really a
no-brainer.
You know your mommy, I can cook, I cook very well and we are
very creative with how we cook.
Right, your father has nevercooked you a meal.
In fact, I think he has burntmacaroni and cheese.
I don't know how he did that,but he burnt macaroni and cheese

(37:22):
once.
So if you want to eat food, youdefinitely want to come with me
.
Secondly, I know how to makeclothes.
I knit, I sew, I crochet.
I know how to make yarn, so youwill always have something on
your back.
We can fix shoes.
I have the knowledge of how todo these things.
So as long as you and I worktogether and we scavenge the
things needed, you will alwayshave clothes on your back, which

(37:45):
is super important.
Right.
Shoes on your feet, clothes onyour back.
Thirdly, you know your mom is amartial artist and I've been
practicing for over 30 years, soI'm very skilled in not only
hand-to-hand combat, but bladedweapons and gun disarms, and so
you will feel safe with me.
Not only can I stab a zombiethrough the eye, because I'm

(38:07):
that precise, I know how todisarm that gun from the person
that puts the gun to the back ofour head.
We will get out of thatsituation because I am
proficient.
Not only that, we are alsoversed in climbing trees, so we
can get out of the way ofzombies finding a place to stay.

(38:29):
Protection you will be safe,fed and taken care of with your
mom.
I don't know if your dad reallydid any of those things.
That was always something thatwas kind of my specialty and I
mean again, the martial artsthing is just really unique to
me.
So, and I've been training you.
You know your knife skills comefrom me Absolutely and I love

(38:50):
you.
Boo boo, let's go.
Let's go on our adventuretogether.

Speaker 8 (38:54):
Okay, well, before I speak with dad pre-apocalypse,
what is your stance onmcdonald's?
Do we, uh, can we go, or do wehave mcdonald's at home?
We?

Speaker 4 (39:07):
can have.
No, no, we can go to mcdonald's.
Absolutely we can.
Why would we not?
Um, maybe we wouldn't go everyday, because then we would get
sick of mcdonald's.
But um, yeah, we've been tomcdonald's quite a bit and I
know that you have had yournugget meal.
You've had your chance to goplay in the ball pit.
I have suspicion that thatcould be where the zombie virus

(39:29):
started, in that ball pit, soI'm very happy that you did not
contract it and we were able tosave you from that.
So going forward, we should gofind a McDonald's and see if
there's nuggets left.
Okay, let's go on thatadventure.

Speaker 8 (39:43):
Thank you, dad, you're up.

Speaker 6 (39:47):
Yeah.
So, son, you know that yourmother's a liar.
So basically, I want to mentionthat.
You know that I'm trained aswell.
In a sense of I'm a policeofficer.
I have all those tactical kindof skills in the sense of
shooting, taking down people,convincing other people to kind

(40:10):
of stay away.
We're not going to be next topeople to really be, or them to
be, a threat.
We're going to be kind of inthe woods doing our thing,
hanging out like we usually do.
Buddy, you remember all the dayswhen we used to throw football,
pigskin and all that stuff toeach other, love football, and
we used to watch the footballgames together, so just things
of that nature.
You know I'm going to be ableto take care of you, buddy, and

(40:31):
we're going to do this thingtogether, you and me, buddy.
And as for the McDonald'squestion, I'm a huge.
You know I love McDonald's.
You know I always get the twocheeseburger meal.
You get your kids meal, all thegood stuff as well.
You get your toys.
But again, we're just gonnahave fun, we're gonna stay alive
, we're gonna keep moving, buddy.
All right, okay.

Speaker 8 (40:52):
Okay.

Speaker 4 (40:53):
You might be naked, though, and hungry.

Speaker 6 (40:57):
I mean you have to have the fabric to even do the
clothes.
You don't have fabric.

Speaker 4 (41:03):
There's fabric everywhere.

Speaker 6 (41:05):
You've watched all zombie movies.
You've never seen a movie thatwas just naked, except for like
one.
Clothes are going to be okay.
Instead of taking the time ofknitting, you just go into the
house and go oh, there's clothesright here.

Speaker 4 (41:18):
We can fix clothes, we can fix shoes, and he's a
growing boy.
You don't even know.
You don't even know what histeacher's name is this year at
school.
Do you do?

Speaker 6 (41:26):
my parent teacher conference no, I've been working
my ass off to keep this familyafloat.
When?
When is his doctor appointment?
I've been working overtime, uhgood for you.

Speaker 4 (41:35):
You don't need to work anymore.
There is no paycheck to be had.
The rest of of thatresponsibility falls on you.

Speaker 6 (41:40):
That's why I didn't know who his teacher was,
because I was working 24-7.
That's a bad dad, honey, Plus Ialways know, I always made time
to play with my son.
You know, throw the footballwith each other, throw the
baseball and all the good stuffas well.

Speaker 4 (41:55):
We have to survive.

Speaker 1 (41:57):
I have to ask Sylvester, do you enjoy throwing
the football?

Speaker 8 (42:02):
no, my dad doesn't know me fully, but that's okay.
That's okay, we'll get to knoweach other in the apocalypse
it's about spending timetogether and also I want to ask
how.

Speaker 1 (42:14):
I think the point where we're, where we're closest
, the converging point in theparenting styles is McDonald's,
and how much time are each ofyou going to spend fulfilling
the McDonald's needs.

Speaker 8 (42:30):
Yes, if I needed to go to McDonald's every day, if
that's what we're looking forgoing to different McDonald's,
because I eat french fries andnuggets.

Speaker 4 (42:43):
Is that really what you want?
Boo Boo.

Speaker 8 (42:45):
That feasible?

Speaker 4 (42:47):
We will go take over a McDonald's and that will be
our new home.

Speaker 6 (42:50):
We will stay there until supplies run out.

Speaker 4 (42:53):
After supplies run out, we'll go take over another
McDonald's.
We know there's one almost onevery corner we can be.
We will call ourselves theMcDonald's and we will just move
from restaurant to restaurantuntil we go through supply, do
you?

Speaker 6 (43:09):
remember when you told our son no, we're not going
to McDonald's, it's bad for youall the time.
So that was part of our divorceand I'm going to take our son
to McDonald's you cannot putwords in my mouth.

Speaker 4 (43:22):
This is another reason why we're divorced
Because you don't remember thethings I say.
Let him speak.

Speaker 8 (43:29):
I'm going to make this decision later on as a
child of divorce.
I would like to move on to thenext question, please.

Speaker 4 (43:39):
Sorry, Sylvester.
I should have had a dramawarning for that Sylvester is
getting triggered, are you sure?

Speaker 2 (43:45):
alright, let's move on.

Speaker 8 (43:47):
Yeah, oh, go ahead, sylvester oh no, I know the
winner.

Speaker 2 (43:50):
I'll just let you guys know later, that's fair if
you need a therapy session afterthis, we'll fit the bill.

Speaker 6 (43:57):
I don't know what the hell this is.
What did you guys turn thisinto?

Speaker 2 (44:01):
well it it keeps going.
If your competitor wrote azombie survival guide, what
title would it have and what'sthe worst piece of advice in it
that they would give?

Speaker 4 (44:12):
So if Brandon wrote a survival guide, what's the
title?

Speaker 6 (44:17):
And what's the name?
We're naming it for the otherperson you're saying, right,
yeah, okay, do I get 30?
We're naming it for the otherperson.

Speaker 4 (44:21):
You're saying, right, okay do I get 30 seconds you?

Speaker 6 (44:24):
might.
So what's the name of the book?
And then what's the worst pieceof advice they put in it?
You're saying exactly.

Speaker 8 (44:34):
I just wanted to make sure I understood what they
wrote and the worst advice theyhave in it.

Speaker 2 (44:37):
I'm secretly wondering what Sylvester's
commentary would be for each ofthem at this point I'm just
enjoying my popcorn?
Yeah, I'm eating some popcornalso hilarious, you guys.

Speaker 4 (44:47):
When you both busted out the popcorn, I was chuckling
stale does that mean you'reready, brandon hands up?

Speaker 8 (44:53):
yeah hands up.
Who's going?

Speaker 6 (44:54):
I think, you should go first I think you should,
okay, perfect, you know this.
This poorly written survivalguide, written by la, by Lori
Calcaterra, is going to becalled Sunshines and Rainbows,
and the reason being is becauseshe has a false fallacy of what
the apocalypse is, and it's nota good one.
She has a you know, she doesn'tunderstand how it works and all

(45:15):
that stuff as well, and herworst piece of advice is going
to be finding the treasure atthe end of the rainbow.
Because she's still in this kidmentality that there's.
You know this thing and it'sjust like whatever.
It's just.
You're not processing reality.
It is what it is and that'swhat she's got.
That's her biggest piece ofadvice is go find the rainbow
and look at the treasure at theend of the rainbow.
Horrible, stupid advice.

Speaker 4 (45:38):
It is what it is.
You know you can't give advice.
This is why we're divorced.
You don't even know me.
It's literally what you wrote.
Brandon's survival guide iscalled.
I must ask you a question, andthe worst advice he has in here
and this is directed at him,nobody else.
If you lose your mom in theapocalypse, quit.

Speaker 6 (45:58):
Peace out.
It's not worth it.
I think you know it's actuallykind of good, you know, in the
sense of like you gave.
You know that's your mother.
I think I did better.
I mean, it's your mother.
You love your mother, yeah,instead of going down at the end
of the rainbow and falling fora trick that you were told when
you were a kid that a leprechaunis going to be down there.
That's cute.

(46:19):
You're arguing my point thatSylvester should choose me.

Speaker 4 (46:23):
That's what you're arguing.

Speaker 6 (46:24):
I'm arguing the point that it's a setup.

Speaker 4 (46:28):
Thank you, Brandon.
Choose your mom every time.

Speaker 8 (46:31):
That was good.

Speaker 6 (46:35):
I think the rule is who has a dumber thing and yours
is dumber.
Thank you, Brandon.

Speaker 4 (46:40):
You're one that you wrote Sunshine andon.

Speaker 6 (46:40):
Thank you for the one that you wrote sunshine and
rain.
No, the one that you wrote iswhat I said your sunshine and
rainbow sucks who's ever,whoever has the, whoever created
the worst advice situation, isthe winner yeah, yeah, and which
, in my theory, would be me,yeah that's brandon checking out
, because your mom checked out.

Speaker 8 (47:01):
That's a mama's boy thing.
That's fine with me, Iunderstand, I'm not gonna judge
anybody, so, uh, but chasing therainbow anyway, chasing the
rainbow is, uh, probably not thebest thing to go with.
So yeah, that's a wild, wildidea.
I'm going to award that to you,brandon.

(47:23):
That was good, that was funny.

Speaker 4 (47:25):
I think mine will pay off in the long run.
I think Val.

Speaker 8 (47:26):
Laurie just backdoored in that last round.
You know, yeah, that was good.

Speaker 4 (47:36):
He admitted it.

Speaker 2 (47:37):
It's true, I'm contemplating whether we should
just jump into the roastinground, because that's what this
whole thing has been.

Speaker 8 (47:47):
Oh, it's been nothing but a roast, yeah.

Speaker 1 (47:49):
Yeah, in hindsight, why do we even have this yeah?

Speaker 6 (47:54):
Rude.

Speaker 4 (47:56):
I'm just going to throw it up there in advance to
whatever he says, because I knowit's not going to be nice.

Speaker 2 (48:07):
Well, to be fair, all of these questions are
horrifying that I came up with.
I apologize, but not really.
I thought this introduction Iwas about to make for the
roasting round would be a newpart of the evolution of this
episode, but it's alreadyhappening.
Uh, but this is just the nextlevel.
I asked laurie and brandon toprepare their roasts to read
each other for filth, so I needeverybody to grab their shades,
put them on.

Speaker 1 (48:27):
Oh, I need my shade.

Speaker 2 (48:28):
It's going to get real shady shadier than it's
ever been Right now.

Speaker 1 (48:32):
We need our sunglasses to shade us from the
shade.

Speaker 2 (48:36):
Yes, all right Press, play and experience this.

Speaker 5 (48:42):
I got out of bed at all the morning.
Rain clouds up my window and Ican't see at all.

(49:04):
And even if I could, it wouldall be grey.
Take a picture on my wall.
It reminds me that it's not sobad.
It's not so bad.

Speaker 7 (49:17):
It's even cold and I'm wondering why I got out of
bed at all the morning.
And even if I could, it'd allbe grey, but your picture on my
wall.
It reminds me that it's not sobad, it's not so bad.

Speaker 4 (49:40):
Dear Lori, I'm your biggest fan.
I've backed the path of thepill writer since issue one and
I've been there for every launch.
The streams are so much fun.
I unlocked all the tiers,bought the alternate covers and
the Funko Pop.
I even got that hot sauce man,it really tore me up.
I backed every campaign andcan't wait for the next issue to
come out.
I even liked that Wizard of Ozanthology you did, and catfish
was tight.

(50:01):
No doubt I know you're busy andI don't mean to bother, but it
would be dope if I had a cameo,just something to ponder.
I'm sorry to ask.
I know it's a pretty big deal,but I love this comic so much I
want to be inside it.
I want it to be real.
Please think about it.
It would mean the world to me.
It doesn't need to be anythingbig, just a couple of panels,
something easy.
I can send you a referencephoto too.

(50:22):
Hit me up, I'll make a plan.
Draw me in Brand.
Your comics biggest fan.

Speaker 7 (50:30):
It's gone cold and I'm wondering why I got out of
bed at all the morning.
And even if I could, it'd allbe gray, but your picture on my
wall.
It's not so bad.

Speaker 4 (50:52):
Dear Lori, I sent you an email but I guess you
haven't gotten it.
I know you're busy, so I'll trymy best to be patient.
Maybe it went to spam.
Sometimes it does that with toomany caps in the subject.
I'll send a message to your fanpage asking if you checked in.
Anyway, what's up?
How's the comic?
I read some spoilers online,lori, and the possibilities are
astronomic.
And what's the deal with thatcrazy old guy, dwayne Fieng?
Every time he talks I have tostop a minute and think Does he

(51:12):
have the answers or is he justsome crazy dude?
Are his intentions pure?
And what's his obsession withJude?
I'm bouncing off the walltrying to solve this riddle, and
the blister beetles blew mymind.
It fucked me up a little.
Then I learned that it actuallyexists and I wonder how it'd
feel to have a thousand insectsbiting you and blistering your
skin for real.
I know it's messed up, butthat's the kind of stuff I think
about at night, wide awakesitting in the dark wondering if

(51:33):
my cameo will look all right.
I know I shouldn't get ahead ofmyself and I don't want to put
too much pressure, but it wouldreally mean so much to me if our
worlds would come together.
Think about it, lori.
I could give Jude a hand.
I could help him on his quest.
I could be his best friend.
We could find Prince togetherand ride off into the sunset.
We could fix death as a team.
I would be his biggest asset.
This is why we should talk.
I have so many ideas to share.

(51:54):
Jude and I could pose for acover naked with the bear.
You should write me back.
I could be the biggest fan youever lose.
Sincerely yours.
Brand PS.
I got a body pillow of Jude.

Speaker 7 (52:05):
It's cold and I'm wondering why I got out of bed
at all the morning.
wall.

Speaker 5 (52:25):
It reminds me that it's not so bad, not so bad.

Speaker 4 (52:27):
Well, if it isn't, miss, it's too good to make you
a reoccurring character in hercomic book.
This is the last time I evervoice message your ass.
It's been four hours and stillno response.
Was it something I said?
I know you saw that lastmessage I sent.
The delivery receipt was markedon red.
So this voice message I'msending you.
I hope you hear it.
I'm in the bathroom off thefreeway, hey, lori, I just drank
half of the pale sauce.

(52:48):
Dare me to drive.
You know that song by theBeatles Paul wrote for Lennon's
son when John was going throughthe divorce with Cynthia and he
tells him not to carry the worldon his shoulders and not to
play it cool to make the worldcolder.
That's what you could have done, lori.
I could have been in your comic, but it's too late now.
I just guzzled all this hotsauce and I'm gonna vomit.
It's too late now.
My mouth's on fire and it'sturning inside me and all I

(53:08):
wanted was a cameo or an issuewith me on the cover.
I hope you know I ripped up allthe fanfic of Jude with me as
his lover.
I, we could have been togetherand you ruined it.
I'm in the bathroom, lori, thestalls are occupied and I have
so much regret and my stomachturns with liquid fire, my
butthole burns with a thousandsuns and I can't sit still and I
scream about it.
You see, lori, stop barking.
Goddammit, I'm trying to talk.

(53:30):
You hear that, lori?
That sad pancake in the stall.
But I didn't shoot him, lori,I'm not a monster.
Death isn't broken in thisworld.
If he died, his suffering wouldbe over.
I gotta go, boy.
I'm gonna shit my pants now.
Fuck, I got no signal.
How am I gonna send this shitout?

Speaker 7 (53:53):
I'm wondering why I got out of bed at all the
morning.
wall.
It's not so bad.

Speaker 4 (54:15):
Dear Brynn, sorry I took so long to write you back.
Things got busy WithKickstarter and all I've been
running circles.
I'm still in a tizzy.
Thanks so much for watching thestreams.
It means a lot to me.
And as for Dwayne Fink, you'llhave to read the next issue and
see.
I'm really flattered at howmuch you love the comic and all
your support helps us reach ourgoals.
It's astronomic.
If you want a cameo in the nextissue, man, just say the word.

(54:37):
You got it.
But what's with all the stuffabout you wanting to get naked
with Jude and the bear?
Maybe not on the cover, dude,but I'll think about it.
I swear.
I think you should talk tosomeone, though you have a heavy
hand.
Try to understand, friend.
Jude is just an imaginary man.
It's a story I made up yearsago.
None of this is real life.
Try to take a step back andspend some time with your wife.
I don't want you to end up likethis guy on the news.

(54:59):
He shit himself to death afterdrinking hot sauce.
Come to think of it, his namewas he was you, damn.
But what happened to sadpancake?

Speaker 8 (55:12):
I'm crying, oh my god .

Speaker 1 (55:16):
Let me adjust my crown.
I fogged up my sunglasses.
I have to take them off.

Speaker 2 (55:22):
I was crying, are you okay, brandon?

Speaker 6 (55:26):
It is what it is.

Speaker 4 (55:27):
That's epic is what it is.

Speaker 8 (55:29):
Do you have a video, Brandon?
No video.

Speaker 6 (55:32):
Oh, okay, here's the thing.
Look after seeing it and again,just like how the beginning of
the video said, unbeknownst tome you're the champ.
Wow, you're the champ thatyou've submitted me.
I mean, what do I?

Speaker 2 (55:50):
you don't even want to deliver your roast, brandon
no, that's it I mean?

Speaker 6 (55:54):
what do I say?

Speaker 8 (55:55):
turn them in the stand.
Oh my god here.

Speaker 2 (55:57):
oh god, are you gonna mustache?
Are you gonna remove your?
Oh God, are you going tomustache?

Speaker 5 (56:02):
Are you going?

Speaker 2 (56:03):
to remove your mustache right now?
No, bran, what's happening?

Speaker 4 (56:07):
Get out of here with that ring.
What is with you, Laurie?
You gotta give us your roast.
That's the second time All ofour enemies show up with rings.

Speaker 6 (56:15):
There's no roast.

Speaker 8 (56:17):
The roast was done.
This is insane.

Speaker 6 (56:21):
All the built-up animosity was back to that six
minute ender right there okay,so um, so brandon forfeited is
that what's going on?

Speaker 1 (56:31):
I didn't foresee this as a possibility.

Speaker 2 (56:34):
I mean I guess it's good because you guys were tied,
so that that's good there wasone more question I had for you
all, though, and I would love itif you would humor me, just
because, even if you forfeited,brandon, that's very laurie.
I know you might not want toadmit it, but very, I think very
, uh, what's the word I'mlooking for?
Um, humble of you, brandon, toacknowledge that was very nice,

(56:56):
the brilliance, uh.
But but I did have a finalearound called the power of
friendship, and I think it'sreally important that we round
up with it oh I would like eachof you to tell us why the other
person would be your ultimatefriend to have in the zombie
apocalypse.
Looking for sincerity, quirks,skills, their loyalty.

(57:19):
Take a minute and think aboutit.
But this is about the power ofyour friendship underneath all
of the enemy.
Let's get back to the friendpart.

Speaker 1 (57:26):
Back to the friend.

Speaker 8 (57:28):
The enemy's gone.
Let it out.

Speaker 4 (57:32):
I was like let it out , you better not.
You better give that ring toyour wife.

Speaker 6 (57:37):
No, it's not Off the record, it's not a real ring,
it's my.

Speaker 1 (57:41):
It's not even real.

Speaker 8 (57:45):
It's a fake proposal.

Speaker 4 (57:46):
This is why we're divorced.
It's a prop ring, just kidding.
Alright, so in the apocalypse,both Brandon and I can fight,
just so you know.
He's great at long range, I'mgreat at short range, and either
one of us can be a decoy.
I think we would be unstoppable.
Taking out other humans.

(58:08):
Yeah, we can have.
Everybody can take outslow-moving zombies.
Good luck taking outfast-moving zombies.
But I think between Brandon andI we could work out.
We could be singing LittleMermaid songs back and forth and
definitely take out theopposition, like Negan would
never catch us, nah.

Speaker 2 (58:28):
What do?

Speaker 4 (58:28):
you love most about Brandon Laurie.

Speaker 2 (58:30):
What do I love?

Speaker 4 (58:31):
about Brandon.
What made you marry him?

Speaker 1 (58:34):
in the first place.

Speaker 4 (58:35):
Brandon and I are not married Yet.
He didn't produce that ringStop it.

Speaker 1 (58:41):
Even if it is fake.

Speaker 4 (58:41):
I'm sorry, say the question again, sylvester, I'll
let you ask it all right, larry,what do you love about brandon?
In a zombie apocalypse or is areal person?

Speaker 8 (58:48):
yes, like in in the in, I'm gonna go with the zombie
apocalypse.

Speaker 1 (58:52):
I don't know um brandon in the apocalypse is
very dependable and loyal that'sgood just on top of being what
doesn't have to what just in theapocalypse, though not in real
life no, no in general yeah, um,he's very loyal and I think
that you know, uh, it, we'lltalk for real life, like just

(59:14):
speaking about how we bothstarted, you know, creating
comic books around the same time.

Speaker 4 (59:19):
We're still friends, we still support each other, not
only our campaigns, but like weshare resources, we share
contacts.
Stop yawning when I'm trying tocompliment you Well the camera
was on you.

Speaker 6 (59:32):
I was in the background, like you would have
had the spotlight.

Speaker 2 (59:34):
Now people know Not on the recording Brandon,
Everybody's eating in therecording.

Speaker 4 (59:38):
Be nice, I'm trying to give you a compliment.
Anyway, as a friend, I alwayswant Brandon on my team.
Whenever I'm freaking out aboutKickstarter or publishers or
whatever, brandon always has anear that I can borrow and vent.
And again it's just it's.
He's great in the apocalypsebecause we would, we would shoot

(01:00:01):
all the people.
Yeah, how's that?

Speaker 8 (01:00:03):
Thumbs back to your serial killer duo in the
apocalypse.

Speaker 4 (01:00:05):
We would totally be a serial killer duo, all right.

Speaker 1 (01:00:08):
I get why you hate him.

Speaker 4 (01:00:11):
Stop saying that.

Speaker 2 (01:00:12):
out loud this goes on the internet.
All of you are frozen for me,Am I not?
Oh no.

Speaker 8 (01:00:17):
That's just you, I think, I think it's.
Yeah, it's just you.
I can see you move no, oh mygod.

Speaker 2 (01:00:23):
It just quit all of zoom.
Fuck zoom recording.
Stopped fuck zoom, oh my god nono, no, no no it's done.
Well, folks, I'm just gonnacome in here briefly and say
that we lost the internet andhopefully we have all of the
video and audio.

(01:00:44):
But we're back.
We're back, baby, we're back.
And just in time, brandon, foryou to tell us why laurie would
be your best friend in thezombie apocalypse uh, yeah a lot
of it.

Speaker 6 (01:00:55):
You know not to be cliche, but a lot of the things
that she mentioned.
Not to be cliche, but a lot ofthe things that she mentioned.
You know about me she has a lotof those similar qualities.
You know she is loyal, she is agood person in general to just
kind of be, you know around, bea friend with and really a good
resource in this.
You know kind of indiecommunity as well and you know
to second it as well, like justwhen you're having like the

(01:01:15):
stress of the Kickstarter orwhatever going on, just bullshit
in general, uh, it's good tojust vent and she she listens
and all that.
But I, you know, in the zombiesetting it's similar to.
I think we have we both have itin our own way Uh, the will to
not die and I always say it justin my everyday thing Anyways,
thing anyways, like to my family, I was like, no matter what, I

(01:01:36):
will not die, I won't give intoit, uh, and I think she has that
as well and I think in thatwith that duo together in the
zombie apocalypse it would justbe tragic for anybody else
around.
I mean, physically I'm in noshape to do anything, but I
could get there it's.
It's about like the, it's aboutmore so for me, the, uh, you
know, the mental stuff and thephysical stuff comes later and

(01:01:58):
uh, laurie, mentally, you know,has all those attributes you'd
want in a companion if it's inthe zombie apocalypse or just,
uh, doing what we're doing now.
You know, podcasts creating andall that as well.
Um, but she, she is truly, youknow, a really good person,
really good friend to have, youknow, a part of this whole
journey in comic making, contentcreating and zombie apocalypse,

(01:02:20):
killing and fun stuff oh, we'refriends for real I feel like
this is a necessary end.

Speaker 2 (01:02:31):
Uh, sylvester brandon forfeited the crown.
How was this experience for youto witness and to judge it?

Speaker 8 (01:02:38):
It was funny and it was awkward.
I did have moments where Iflashback to my own divorce
things, but I had a great timeand I was definitely.
Well, I wasn't surprisedbecause after seeing that video
I really wasn't surprised thatyou gave up.
There's no comeback.
There's no comeback to that andthat goes part of her character

(01:02:58):
.

Speaker 6 (01:02:59):
You know she brings it and um, and you know a side
note ahead of time.
That was always on my mindanyway, I knew that was coming.
You know Lori and everythingshe does.
She brings it and you'regetting a hundred percent of
Lori in every category of things, and that meant that six minute
video just buried me.

Speaker 8 (01:03:16):
That was.
That was amazing so you know Ihad a great time.
I had a great time.
I don't know, I don't know.
I'd love to do this again, butI don't see how we would.

Speaker 1 (01:03:26):
I don't think anyone would be foolish enough to
challenge the crown again.

Speaker 4 (01:03:31):
Oh no, we're not doing that again.

Speaker 2 (01:03:32):
What would you do for Halloween?
Yeah, zombie show.
You'll be back up against eachother.
Sylvester and laurie andbrandon, I just expect you not
to show up again.

Speaker 8 (01:03:40):
So as long as she doesn't record a diss track, I
think I'm gonna.
I think okay, I mean, you can'tcount on that but the minute
she shows up with videos, I'mjust, I'm out, I'm out.

Speaker 1 (01:03:52):
I think in the future I think it's probably just a
good idea to just show up with adiss track ready to go.

Speaker 8 (01:03:57):
Yeah it's a diss track.
I have about five videoswaiting.

Speaker 4 (01:04:02):
I had a record one for Brandon too that we didn't
even play.

Speaker 6 (01:04:05):
Yeah, that was going to be something for the build up
for it.
I was going to you know,because it's coming out what the
well?
This is off the air, I wouldimagine, but the 24th, yeah.
So I was going to makesomething for, like, the up and
coming getting prepared for it.

Speaker 8 (01:04:18):
This is hilarious.
You guys, you guys are awesome.
I definitely love the fact thatyou guys are so connected and
you're helping each other getthrough this, because indie
publishing is hard and now youguys are doing comic books, so I
know that's even harder.
So, like it's good that youguys have each other.
That's great Is that the reallesson here, sylvester

(01:04:44):
Friendship, yeah, yeah, it'salways good to have friends to
pull you through everything, andclearly Lori is an amazing
friend because you don't needher as an enemy since she's
distressed.

Speaker 6 (01:04:53):
Yeah there ain't no beating it, so you got to keep
your enemies close.
Keep your frenemies close, yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:05:02):
Oh, my goodness, that was great.
Was there a favorite part ofthe battle for everybody, like
the thing that you're going tobe remembering at two o'clock in
the morning?

Speaker 8 (01:05:09):
I'm going to show my wife the video.

Speaker 4 (01:05:11):
I was going to say I think the body pillow of June
takes the cake.

Speaker 1 (01:05:15):
Is that going to be a stretch?

Speaker 4 (01:05:17):
tear it might be now.

Speaker 6 (01:05:20):
Can I be on the body pillow?
No?

Speaker 2 (01:05:25):
What if you did two body pillows of them cuddling
together?

Speaker 4 (01:05:26):
You can make your own body pillow Brandon.

Speaker 6 (01:05:29):
You didn't trademark that or anything.

Speaker 4 (01:05:31):
No, I think you can get them made on Etsy, but you
can make the one of you.
I'll make the one of Jude andsee how many people one of Jude.

Speaker 1 (01:05:38):
Jude body pillow for your Kickstarter, and then, when
we go over to the AvalonKickstarter, we get the Brandon
body pillow.

Speaker 4 (01:05:47):
Brandon, not Andy.
We don't get the Andy one.

Speaker 6 (01:05:50):
No, you're going to get the shirtless Brandon one.

Speaker 4 (01:05:55):
I don't want the shirtless Brandon one Reversible
.

Speaker 2 (01:05:59):
Lori, how does it feel to know you successfully
defended your crown.
You don't have to get rid of itoh, it feels good.

Speaker 4 (01:06:04):
It feels good because one I was really worried that I
was gonna have to ship thisyeah, shipping sucks leah knows
um.
When she shipped it to me I waslike, wow, all the things you
have to do to protect this.
So when I came in, I was like Iwas pretty confident, but as it
was going on, I was like Idon't know um.
But I'm so glad, I'm so glad Igot to keep the crown.
This is my baby.

(01:06:25):
It's the first one, of course,and I show this off.
It's part of my title on uh,all the things in my bio.

Speaker 8 (01:06:31):
So I'm so glad I get to keep the zombie ween crown I
was just saying I was glad wedidn't have to do a tiebreaker.
I don't think I like judgingit's hard, no, wonder we asked
you.

Speaker 2 (01:06:44):
So when are we going to see you wax off your mustache
, Brandon?

Speaker 8 (01:06:47):
Wax it off.

Speaker 6 (01:06:51):
Do you need wax?

Speaker 1 (01:06:51):
Because, we can send you wax.

Speaker 8 (01:06:53):
It's in the lava lamp .

Speaker 6 (01:06:55):
Yeah, yeah, you got to make it from the lava lamp.
Spencer's got to make it in thelava lamp.
Yeah, yeah, you got to make itfrom the lava lamp.

Speaker 4 (01:06:59):
Sylvester's got to make it from the lava lamp.
Oh, I should have given thatanswer.
That would have been genius.

Speaker 2 (01:07:03):
Show it to us being mailed.
We need to see it going intothe mail with Lori's name on it,
not her full address, thoughit's not Doc's Lori today.
Is it considered a biohazard?

Speaker 4 (01:07:13):
I'm just kidding.

Speaker 8 (01:07:18):
Sy semester.
Do you want a hair as like amemento?
No, thank you, I'm good.

Speaker 2 (01:07:21):
I thought you said a bit.
You said you're good okay.

Speaker 6 (01:07:24):
I'm good.
Is it even possible to wax offa mustache?
Hell yeah, it's gonna hurt.
It's not getting waxed, it'llget fine printed do me a favor.

Speaker 4 (01:07:37):
Here's what you're going to do.
You're going to shave it,collect the hairs and get like a
piece of like that clearpacking tape.
Okay, put all the hair on thepacking tape and then put
another piece of tape over it,so it's sealed.

Speaker 1 (01:07:52):
I don't want to open it like a glitter bob.

Speaker 6 (01:07:55):
Yeah, no.

Speaker 4 (01:07:57):
I also want to frame it and put it on my wall, so I
need it to be like.

Speaker 6 (01:08:01):
I got to make it look pretty.
Now I got to make it look likea mustache.

Speaker 4 (01:08:05):
Yeah, that'd be awesome.

Speaker 6 (01:08:06):
I don't know how that's going to be possible, but
I'll figure it out.

Speaker 1 (01:08:09):
You have to put the packing tape on first and then
shave it.

Speaker 4 (01:08:21):
Or cut out a piece of masking tape in the shape of a
mustache.

Speaker 1 (01:08:23):
Okay, pick up the hairs with that first and then
put it in between two clearpieces, that way laurie can wear
it.

Speaker 4 (01:08:26):
Yes, just weird guys this is getting creepy.

Speaker 2 (01:08:30):
I am sure that everybody listening has fallen
in love with each of you alittle bit more, so I would love
to know before we finish up.
First of all, thank you forgoing so hard at each other.
That was traumatizing and also,like my red, my nervous system
does feel re-regulated after thepower of friendship chat, uh.
But I would love to know whatis one thing you want to promote
today and where can folks findyou?
Sylvester, go first oh, um wait.

Speaker 8 (01:08:54):
What was that again?

Speaker 2 (01:08:55):
What do you want to promote today and where can
folks find?

Speaker 8 (01:08:57):
you Okay.
So in the theme of zombies, Ido have my Planet Dead series
and that's three books in.
I'm working on book four rightnow and I have Dead Soil, which
is about the zombie apocalypsethat was started by the
transatlantic slave trade, andit's just zombies and pirates

(01:09:20):
and a whole bunch of good times.
So that's what I'd like to plugin.
You can reach me at, uh,sylvester Barzycom and at
Sylvester Barzy on all socialmedia channels, but I'm only on
Instagram most of the time, soget me there.

Speaker 2 (01:09:35):
That's where we hang Brandon Um grandma sometimes.

Speaker 6 (01:09:39):
So get me there.
That's where we hang brandon.
Um, I have avalon uh comic onall social media platforms.
Right now we're going to be orpretty soon we're going to be
releasing issue six for thepublic, uh, which will be the
final installment of season oneof avalon um.
That'll be available foreverybody for purchase to kind
of get the finale of season oneand get that moving.
Um other than that, we're kindof just working on a remastered
issue one for issue one and thenwe're going to be working

(01:10:01):
towards the trade paperback andthen that's basically that.
Just make sure you're followingus on all social medias.
Go to our website, sign up forour newsletter and you'll get
notified of future things comingout.
And make sure you get yourAvalon on.
I make sure you get your Avalonon.
I just came up with that.
Now, get your Avalon on.

Speaker 4 (01:10:19):
Lori, I'm Lori Calcaterra, reigning first
zombie wing queen.
You can find my issue numberseven.
Late pledges are still turnedon in the Kickstarter, so if you
would like to get a copy of thebook and then it will be out
this fall as soon as things arecomplete so you will get to see

(01:10:40):
what happens to Jude St Clair onhis journey to figure out what
broke death as he breaks intothe undead retirement community.
If you don't know what any ofthat means, oh my gosh, I'm so
ready for you to join our path.
Also, you can find my newsingle, bran.
We'll be releasing that, so ifyou would like to download that

(01:11:00):
on Spotify just kidding, it'snot going to be there, but you
can find me on social media.
I'm on all of the socials,either as Lori Calcaterra or
path of the pale writer.
You should join our Facebookgroup.
We are currently naming anundead pig.
Kevin Bacon is in the lead.
So if you want to put in yourtwo cents, join the group, and
thank you very much for havingus on the show.

(01:11:22):
This was a blast, 100%.

Speaker 2 (01:11:26):
Y'all are some of our favorite creators.
This was truly so much fun.
Thank you, brandon, for comingup to me and saying you wanted
to steal Lori's crown.
A wonderful moment at Living.

Speaker 6 (01:11:36):
Dead.
I did want to mention.
I want some sort of royaltiesfrom that, since my name is
mentioned in that song.

Speaker 4 (01:11:42):
I was going to say, brandon, you showed my faith.

Speaker 6 (01:11:46):
The moneymaker right here.
I want 50% royalties.

Speaker 1 (01:11:49):
I mean to be fair.
He did do the hook.

Speaker 4 (01:11:52):
Yeah, yeah, and the hook.
I mean I did the rest of it,Dan wrote it.

Speaker 1 (01:11:57):
Dan wrote it.
Dan wrote it, slander.

Speaker 2 (01:12:00):
You're letting everybody know this was rigged,
lori, what it was rigged.

Speaker 6 (01:12:04):
I knew it.
I knew it was rigged.
Oh my God, I take back myforfeit.

Speaker 4 (01:12:09):
I had to do it, though.
I had to do it Just because itexisted, doesn't mean that
anything was going to happen.
I had to do all the work.

Speaker 1 (01:12:16):
When did I send that?
That's funny.

Speaker 2 (01:12:22):
Dan's been working on it for months, ever since
Living Dead Weekend, and thenWednesday you sent it to Lori
and said do what you will.

Speaker 8 (01:12:29):
She's been dissing you for months, wow.

Speaker 4 (01:12:32):
We sent it on Wednesday and I thought about it
and then I started working iton Wednesday night, thursday.
So I mean like this was likeovernight cram session, like get
it all in Overnight success,yeah, and I mean like I was
literally finishing it at 12.
When I was logging on, it wasstill rendering, so I was like
gee, I hope it works.

Speaker 2 (01:12:53):
And then everything went wrong with technology, but
it made it happen, correct.

Speaker 8 (01:12:57):
Dan, you have a future in parody music.

Speaker 5 (01:12:59):
This is a no contest.

Speaker 1 (01:13:02):
Yeah, they call me weird Dan.

Speaker 6 (01:13:04):
I'm waving this at no contest, no contest.

Speaker 4 (01:13:09):
Too late.
You already forfeited.

Speaker 2 (01:13:11):
I love how the moment of friendship just went away.
I started this as part two.

Speaker 4 (01:13:20):
We're getting the promo ready for it.

Speaker 8 (01:13:23):
No're not.

Speaker 2 (01:13:23):
You were tied and robbed uh it's okay this was, um
, I'm a little sad it's overbecause I've been really looking
forward to this.
Couldn't sleep last night, theanticipation and sylvester, I'm
serious, I didn't realize thethe re-traumatization that would
happen and I will pay for youone therapy session to talk it
through um I was sitting there,I was just like well I don't

(01:13:46):
know.

Speaker 5 (01:13:46):
I was like we probably should have asked yeah
yeah, it was a last minute idea.

Speaker 1 (01:13:54):
Do we need a content?

Speaker 4 (01:13:55):
between mom and dad.
I I'm 12.

Speaker 2 (01:13:58):
Were you literally 12 Sylvester.

Speaker 8 (01:14:01):
Huh, when I was 12, when they were getting divorced.

Speaker 2 (01:14:04):
Were you 12?

Speaker 8 (01:14:05):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:14:09):
I was like 12 or 11.
Oh no, hey, chosen family,right?
That's kind of what we are here.

Speaker 1 (01:14:14):
For me it was my second divorce, so it wasn't
that big of a deal, I understandI got my first, most
traumatizing one out of the outof the way before I could even
process and record memories.

Speaker 2 (01:14:26):
So yeah, got all the interesting damage in right away
well, thanks everybody forlistening uh, this has been and
watching.
Hopefully, if this works, thishas been an experience when I
never knew that I was going tosign up for, and I hope that
this makes you all even moreexcited for 2025 zombie ween
game show.

(01:14:46):
Sylvester and Lori will bethere and a couple of new folks
maybe Brandon will show up.

Speaker 1 (01:14:51):
We'll see yeah, we'll see he's shaking his head.

Speaker 8 (01:14:54):
He'll be there, after all this rigged stuff, I call
dibs on dance.
Find someone else to write yourmusic.

Speaker 1 (01:15:03):
Everybody's got to show up with a diss track.

Speaker 4 (01:15:05):
You have to do the work, though that was like two
days of work.

Speaker 1 (01:15:10):
And everybody shows up with a diss track, but it's
all written by me.

Speaker 4 (01:15:13):
That'd be amazing.

Speaker 1 (01:15:15):
Yes, then it will be down to video editing skills
yeah, yeah let's say goodbyeeverybody, goodbye everybody
thanks for joining the zombiebook club.
What an episode that was, boy I.
I really want to know howpeople feel after that episode.

(01:15:38):
You could do that by.
You could send us a voicemailwith your reaction to what you
just witnessed, up to threeminutes 614-699-0006.
Also if you want to give ussome support, give us a rating
or a review.
We love it.
Five stars, please, I mean.

Speaker 2 (01:15:59):
I think this was a five-star episode.
It was a five-star fight.

Speaker 1 (01:16:01):
Yeah, unless you're a child of divorced parents.

Speaker 2 (01:16:04):
And they yelled a lot when you were a kid, then this
might feel reminiscent.

Speaker 1 (01:16:09):
Yes, you can also sign up for our newsletter and
follow us on Instagram atZombieBookClubPodcast.
That's another good place totell us what you thought about
this episode when we put outsome stuff about it over there.
Um, also, you could join thebrain munchers collective on
discord.
All the links there down therein those show notes, along with

(01:16:32):
the links to the uh creators inthis episode and uh, don't
forget the the uh, the elevatorpitch at the beginning.
That's all of that informationthat's down there.
You could just click on it.

Speaker 2 (01:16:47):
it's one click away and you could go to those places
support the comic creators andauthors that were a part of this
episode.
They're all incrediblestorytellers and you will not
regret reading their stuff um.
The final lesson and commentfor today is that the power of
friendship can save you in theapocalypse, even when the end is
nigh.
So please, Zombesties, don'tdie.

Speaker 1 (01:17:07):
Bye, bye, bye, bye.

Speaker 2 (01:17:09):
Love you.
It's going to be okay everybody, it's going to be okay.

Speaker 1 (01:17:13):
It's going to be okay .
Mom and dad are getting backtogether.

Speaker 2 (01:17:15):
Or not.
I don't want mine to.

All Episodes

SummerWeen Slamdown with special guest Brandon Starocci and Laurie Calcaterra and a surprise guest Judge | Zombie Book Club Ep 110

Episode Transcript

Popular Podcasts

Stuff You Should Know

Dateline NBC

New Heights with Jason & Travis Kelce

.css-15opob5{left:0;position:absolute;top:0.8rem;} All Episodes

.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}SummerWeen Slamdown with special guest Brandon Starocci and Laurie Calcaterra and a surprise guest Judge | Zombie Book Club Ep 110