January 5, 2023 • 13 mins
Why does Skeery want a murkin? We talk about our office bath etiquette in our new building!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:03):
What would you talk about on your on your podcast?
Firm Hi Elvis represents fifteen minute Morning Show Check check check, check,
sibilant sibilants. I was quite the fess man. Hello, check
(00:24):
check check sibilants, sibilants. Sibilants, sibilants. Check check check you okay?
Are we recording? Yeah? So's recording anything that's green? Right,
got checking and reading that correct? Can we go? Sibilants, sibilants.
You put the sibil in sibilants. What's writing? Hi? Here
(00:44):
we go? Oh, we have some people missing from the
fifteen minute morning show podcast. Let's scan the room, Dianna,
who's missing here? Will? They will be right here shirking
their duties. So yeah, once again, we're ready to go,
But Danielle and Gandhi they're not ready. And we're running
late today, very late. But I tell you who is here.
(01:05):
Thank you Scotty Be for making in here to worry. Hello, Hi, Hi,
they're scary. Hi. Froggy is off doing some other things,
but he has permission. He asked, he asked. And there's
Garrett at the tip. That's the tip, the tip. And
here's my buddy straight ns right and my pal Elvis
d here we go. So Garrett, where are Gandhi and Danielle?
(01:28):
They are talking to our ops manager, speak of the
devil who decided they were hanging up with Andrew. You're
not working where they were working? They were finalizing some photos. Yeah,
we were picking our new headshot. Big decisions he wanted
us to go through because the ones that were chosen
for us were terrible. The one I really want to
(01:48):
use they said no, why well, Yankee hat giving the
middle fingers, so they didn't think that'd be appropriate to
send out. I say them, Yeah, I love this, Victor,
can we say that? Yes, I'm going to post that picture.
You know everyone can see it. We should keep that
in the files. Don't let them tell you what to do,
because Danielle, you're a senior member of the Morning. Don't
(02:09):
say the word senior. But you know what's going to happen.
The children's hospital is gonna be like, hey, we'd love
to use Danielle, can you send over a picture doing
my Yankee hates actually turned out the best. The ones
that turned out the best for us were the ones
that none of you guys saw because we were just
kind of like messing around. So I'm mind sitting on
the ground with ripped jeans giving the finger and hers
(02:30):
is and a Yankee hat giving the finger. Like my
favorite one, honestly that I probably will use is honestly,
when I put on a blue T shirt that I
wore to the show that day, and I was just like,
he goes, you look so comfortable. I go, because this
isn't this is me. But those are the pictures we
should all be taking out. What we're just saying, we
(02:50):
got a list. You know, you guys are lucky that
you got to actually select your photos. I was told
that someone was picking for me. I haven't even seen
the picture that I'm going to be. No, we were
told that too, but I wrote back, now keep him on.
We're in charge of us. So that it's hard looking
good because every picture I could use, look, so how
(03:13):
do you pick? Somebody can't help it? My hand some
prints He was dressed though, because he had so many
photos to choose from. It to stress, you know what,
just throw a dart, just whatever one ends. One can reveal.
I haven't even done my photos yet. No, littlek fantastic diamond.
She's very looks great too. Thanks well, I don't know
(03:37):
what camera to look at. Diana. Do I look at
you or do I look at this thing? Look at
either one. We have a lot of cameras now, so Dianna, actually,
can you show you on another camera? You should see
the Diana has like a real producer's board with all
(03:58):
the faders and things, AMers and stuff. You're remarkable. We
love our Deana. Hey is the cameral behind me picking
up my bald spot. If you wanted to, don't with
Deanna for your cross. So unless you're a dickhead, it
doesn't want yet get him American, I asked American question. No,
(04:24):
I'm proud of me. American who invented that? Like? Who
had to me? Were like, I just don't have any pubes.
I really need to win. Back in the day they
were important. Really sure to look at the seventies pub
like very hair. And I must speak from personal experience,
people who have cancer treatments that lose all their hair.
I can't unders listen if you if I don't have
(04:45):
any down there because of cancer, people will have to
understand that. I'm not ashamed. But by the way, I
don't I don't mind not going to put a hat
on down there. Maybe you know, like nobody, nobody in
this universe prefers a wig. And what if you're doing
something down there and it falls off all of a sudden,
(05:08):
someone has a goatee? Do you have to brush it out?
When do you use these things? And you launch it
and threw out in the laundry? Wait, what are you
looking at? They were invented so that sex workers could
hide their signs of disease. Like, you know, what can you?
Can you please cover up my fissors? This makes scary
(05:32):
bald spot even funnier now, like if you puts it
on my twig. This conversation has gone to hell, Dianna,
I apologize, it's just n skinness. I don't care anymore,
and you look just fine by the way to bring
(05:54):
up something. So in the men's room, and if you
want to show a graphic of this later you can.
When you walk into use the bath room, you look
to the right and there are three urinals. So when
I walk in, I go to the middle urinal. And
so if you come into p after me, you either
have to stand next to me or you have to
go to a private stall. So I'm testing everyone to
(06:16):
see who has the strength to stand next to me next.
There are dividers. It's like dividers, I know, but there
are still guys who are like, they'll be like, nah,
if I have a chance to stand in a stall,
I actually did that over the versus next to a guy.
Somebody was in the middle of three, and I'm like, no,
I think code as a man, you're supposed to go
(06:38):
to the stall one, it's one in three, but the
guys into you go to the s which Elvis is
violating is if there's three, you go to the end.
You don't go to the middle. Why let me ask
a question. If there's the urinals and then there's the
stall with the door, why wouldn't most people in general
(06:59):
want the stall with the door? Why would in front
of the splashback when you use a toilet, splash splash back.
And and also there's dividers between jurnals. You can't you
can't well, you can't really meet gays. You can't meet
(07:19):
gay had the ultimate If you walk in and a
guy is in three, are you saying that you should
challenge yourself and go to number two or you should
go to one? Oh no, no, See if I went
in and a guy was at number three, I would
go to number one. I would I would leave the
one in between just I don't care, but I don't
want to upset anyone. And you know, but if I
(07:43):
walk in and I'm by myself, I go. If I
want to test the waters, I'll go to the middle
and see what happens the next move. No, you know what,
because you basically take up three yurinals, then no, no,
guys volunteer in your world and take them three year
ols because you are your lady, not my code. The
real quest is, the real test is you should go
(08:05):
in and you should stand in number one, and then
if a guy comes in and stands the number two,
that's the test. That's what you say. It's a different
test moving you're taking up all three because you took
up number two. You know that's a dick move for
people like you. Okay, question to the women. Let's say
you go into the women's room and there are three stalls. Okay,
(08:26):
now there's someone install number one. Would you go to
stall number two or stall number three? I would go
to stall number three unless stall number two, unless it's dirty,
but that I would like to keep that equally as clean.
Now I would I would you want go to the
stall next to someone else? Now unless I'm talking like
if Diamond and I walked we did this, Diamond and
I walked into the bathroom together and we were having
(08:47):
a conversation. I might go to stall number one, she'd
go to number two. So we can continue the copert.
You could talk while you while you're sittings of all them,
you know, because p yes, I cannot talk during a pool.
Scott do you to stress certain syllables I can't go to.
(09:15):
So Scotty does something if in the public bathroom, if
he's going number two, he puts his feet up if
he knows someone else is in the bathroom. So I've
been in the bathroom knowing Scotty's in there, and I
don't see his feet, So you put your feet up.
I just stay very quiet, is what I When I
went peeing yesterday, you were in that stall, I was okay.
There's nothing that makes me creep out more than you
(09:35):
go to the man's room and there's soon install and
they you know, they freeze, they're they're not gonna do
another thing in that stall until you leave the room.
I will clench, so hard until you walk out, So
then that means it means I've got a pee faster
and wash my hands to get out faster. Otherwise you're
over there going him. How long can he hold it?
I'm gonna test you next time. I normally shut the
(09:56):
lights off on him because then I hear him go,
he's son him a bitch. I was getting the false
door slam where I leave and I closed the door,
but I'm still standing there, and then I hear them
that's creepy. That means you're into fecal Yes, you got
joy out of that. If I walk in and someone's
in a stall and I go to the urinal, I
(10:17):
make sure to wash my hands extra long so they
can hear the sink and the soap and everything, because
I want that person to know that I'm clean. They
don't care. There are also some people that if you're
sitting in the stall, they walk in and like nope,
and they walk right out. I'll do that, you know.
If I if there's someone in there going at it,
I gotta get out of there. But then where do
(10:39):
we go? Is there only one bathroom on this floor
for each you gotta go to another floor. That was
a big debate yesterday morning, a bunch of other DJs.
We're talking diskoying. They're like, where do we go? Like
and he's like, oh, I have a secret one. Yeah
we heard there's another one like upon the twelfth floor.
They're supposed to be magical. How are you going to
get all the floor? The tenth floor? And how do
(11:03):
people not know about? It? Is in a special place
down a dark hallway. I don't know. It's a dream
world up there. Oh oh they have catering. They have
iced coffee up there the tenth or twelve shut up?
Yes yeah, yesterday they well yesterday made up catering fifth
floor head catering. Yesterday. I saw the picture. It looks
(11:24):
like an executive bathroom. It has a nice little table
in there with a gold tissue box, Like, I need
to see this bath in there. You're high and mighty
in this company. They want to keep you around. Why
don't you request a private bathroom for us? But because
I asked for other things that for me, We're fine.
(11:45):
We're fine, We're fine, guys, we're fine. We've got beautiful facilities.
If you need to go find another Florida pooh and
go find when we have a great setup. It's hard
to air, it's hard to add a drain hole to
a floor that already exists and plumbing. What are you talking? Well?
Putting it another one? Another bathroom? We do. We have
showers here in this facility. We had one in the
(12:06):
old building. We have to have according to contract, what
after our our union has to have a place to
sleep and shower for those that live here, like some
of us do. Really, I've never heard of that at all.
Where the shower, I don't know. I don't know if
there's one here. I think it's then let's pick it.
(12:30):
Let's blow up, get the rat. Do you think would
be the first person to cross the line so that
we could get some wary here in New York if
you work in a union building like we do. We
did and we do, and if the building is going
against union policy, they will take a big, huge, two
story rat and blow it up and put it in
front of the building so the whole world will see
(12:50):
that you're building is in the wrong. I love a
big rat out fronted to see the rat. I'm like, oh,
I used to beg them to inflate the rat. People
like shut up, But how Are we doing on time?
We're about done? Are we done? Are we guys? Are
we done? You talked about a lot of various just
the last podcast of the week. It is, Yeah, we
(13:12):
don't do them on Friday. All right, Wait, won't say goodbye?
I love you? What's up? All right? I gotta run
back up to you. There's some fifteen minute morning show
What would you talk about on your on your podcast?
Firm Hi Elvis represents fifteen minute Morning Show Check check check, check,
sibilant sibilants. I was quite the fess man. Hello, check
(00:24):
check check sibilants, sibilants. Sibilants, sibilants. Check check check you okay?
Are we recording? Yeah? So's recording anything that's green? Right,
got checking and reading that correct? Can we go? Sibilants, sibilants.
You put the sibil in sibilants. What's writing? Hi? Here
(00:44):
we go? Oh, we have some people missing from the
fifteen minute morning show podcast. Let's scan the room, Dianna,
who's missing here? Will? They will be right here shirking
their duties. So yeah, once again, we're ready to go,
But Danielle and Gandhi they're not ready. And we're running
late today, very late. But I tell you who is here.
(01:05):
Thank you Scotty Be for making in here to worry. Hello, Hi, Hi,
they're scary. Hi. Froggy is off doing some other things,
but he has permission. He asked, he asked. And there's
Garrett at the tip. That's the tip, the tip. And
here's my buddy straight ns right and my pal Elvis
d here we go. So Garrett, where are Gandhi and Danielle?
(01:28):
They are talking to our ops manager, speak of the
devil who decided they were hanging up with Andrew. You're
not working where they were working? They were finalizing some photos. Yeah,
we were picking our new headshot. Big decisions he wanted
us to go through because the ones that were chosen
for us were terrible. The one I really want to
(01:48):
use they said no, why well, Yankee hat giving the
middle fingers, so they didn't think that'd be appropriate to
send out. I say them, Yeah, I love this, Victor,
can we say that? Yes, I'm going to post that picture.
You know everyone can see it. We should keep that
in the files. Don't let them tell you what to do,
because Danielle, you're a senior member of the Morning. Don't
(02:09):
say the word senior. But you know what's going to happen.
The children's hospital is gonna be like, hey, we'd love
to use Danielle, can you send over a picture doing
my Yankee hates actually turned out the best. The ones
that turned out the best for us were the ones
that none of you guys saw because we were just
kind of like messing around. So I'm mind sitting on
the ground with ripped jeans giving the finger and hers
(02:30):
is and a Yankee hat giving the finger. Like my
favorite one, honestly that I probably will use is honestly,
when I put on a blue T shirt that I
wore to the show that day, and I was just like,
he goes, you look so comfortable. I go, because this
isn't this is me. But those are the pictures we
should all be taking out. What we're just saying, we
(02:50):
got a list. You know, you guys are lucky that
you got to actually select your photos. I was told
that someone was picking for me. I haven't even seen
the picture that I'm going to be. No, we were
told that too, but I wrote back, now keep him on.
We're in charge of us. So that it's hard looking
good because every picture I could use, look, so how
(03:13):
do you pick? Somebody can't help it? My hand some
prints He was dressed though, because he had so many
photos to choose from. It to stress, you know what,
just throw a dart, just whatever one ends. One can reveal.
I haven't even done my photos yet. No, littlek fantastic diamond.
She's very looks great too. Thanks well, I don't know
(03:37):
what camera to look at. Diana. Do I look at
you or do I look at this thing? Look at
either one. We have a lot of cameras now, so Dianna, actually,
can you show you on another camera? You should see
the Diana has like a real producer's board with all
(03:58):
the faders and things, AMers and stuff. You're remarkable. We
love our Deana. Hey is the cameral behind me picking
up my bald spot. If you wanted to, don't with
Deanna for your cross. So unless you're a dickhead, it
doesn't want yet get him American, I asked American question. No,
(04:24):
I'm proud of me. American who invented that? Like? Who
had to me? Were like, I just don't have any pubes.
I really need to win. Back in the day they
were important. Really sure to look at the seventies pub
like very hair. And I must speak from personal experience,
people who have cancer treatments that lose all their hair.
I can't unders listen if you if I don't have
(04:45):
any down there because of cancer, people will have to
understand that. I'm not ashamed. But by the way, I
don't I don't mind not going to put a hat
on down there. Maybe you know, like nobody, nobody in
this universe prefers a wig. And what if you're doing
something down there and it falls off all of a sudden,
(05:08):
someone has a goatee? Do you have to brush it out?
When do you use these things? And you launch it
and threw out in the laundry? Wait, what are you
looking at? They were invented so that sex workers could
hide their signs of disease. Like, you know, what can you?
Can you please cover up my fissors? This makes scary
(05:32):
bald spot even funnier now, like if you puts it
on my twig. This conversation has gone to hell, Dianna,
I apologize, it's just n skinness. I don't care anymore,
and you look just fine by the way to bring
(05:54):
up something. So in the men's room, and if you
want to show a graphic of this later you can.
When you walk into use the bath room, you look
to the right and there are three urinals. So when
I walk in, I go to the middle urinal. And
so if you come into p after me, you either
have to stand next to me or you have to
go to a private stall. So I'm testing everyone to
(06:16):
see who has the strength to stand next to me next.
There are dividers. It's like dividers, I know, but there
are still guys who are like, they'll be like, nah,
if I have a chance to stand in a stall,
I actually did that over the versus next to a guy.
Somebody was in the middle of three, and I'm like, no,
I think code as a man, you're supposed to go
(06:38):
to the stall one, it's one in three, but the
guys into you go to the s which Elvis is
violating is if there's three, you go to the end.
You don't go to the middle. Why let me ask
a question. If there's the urinals and then there's the
stall with the door, why wouldn't most people in general
(06:59):
want the stall with the door? Why would in front
of the splashback when you use a toilet, splash splash back.
And and also there's dividers between jurnals. You can't you
can't well, you can't really meet gays. You can't meet
(07:19):
gay had the ultimate If you walk in and a
guy is in three, are you saying that you should
challenge yourself and go to number two or you should
go to one? Oh no, no, See if I went
in and a guy was at number three, I would
go to number one. I would I would leave the
one in between just I don't care, but I don't
want to upset anyone. And you know, but if I
(07:43):
walk in and I'm by myself, I go. If I
want to test the waters, I'll go to the middle
and see what happens the next move. No, you know what,
because you basically take up three yurinals, then no, no,
guys volunteer in your world and take them three year
ols because you are your lady, not my code. The
real quest is, the real test is you should go
(08:05):
in and you should stand in number one, and then
if a guy comes in and stands the number two,
that's the test. That's what you say. It's a different
test moving you're taking up all three because you took
up number two. You know that's a dick move for
people like you. Okay, question to the women. Let's say
you go into the women's room and there are three stalls. Okay,
(08:26):
now there's someone install number one. Would you go to
stall number two or stall number three? I would go
to stall number three unless stall number two, unless it's dirty,
but that I would like to keep that equally as clean.
Now I would I would you want go to the
stall next to someone else? Now unless I'm talking like
if Diamond and I walked we did this, Diamond and
I walked into the bathroom together and we were having
(08:47):
a conversation. I might go to stall number one, she'd
go to number two. So we can continue the copert.
You could talk while you while you're sittings of all them,
you know, because p yes, I cannot talk during a pool.
Scott do you to stress certain syllables I can't go to.
(09:15):
So Scotty does something if in the public bathroom, if
he's going number two, he puts his feet up if
he knows someone else is in the bathroom. So I've
been in the bathroom knowing Scotty's in there, and I
don't see his feet, So you put your feet up.
I just stay very quiet, is what I When I
went peeing yesterday, you were in that stall, I was okay.
There's nothing that makes me creep out more than you
(09:35):
go to the man's room and there's soon install and
they you know, they freeze, they're they're not gonna do
another thing in that stall until you leave the room.
I will clench, so hard until you walk out, So
then that means it means I've got a pee faster
and wash my hands to get out faster. Otherwise you're
over there going him. How long can he hold it?
I'm gonna test you next time. I normally shut the
(09:56):
lights off on him because then I hear him go,
he's son him a bitch. I was getting the false
door slam where I leave and I closed the door,
but I'm still standing there, and then I hear them
that's creepy. That means you're into fecal Yes, you got
joy out of that. If I walk in and someone's
in a stall and I go to the urinal, I
(10:17):
make sure to wash my hands extra long so they
can hear the sink and the soap and everything, because
I want that person to know that I'm clean. They
don't care. There are also some people that if you're
sitting in the stall, they walk in and like nope,
and they walk right out. I'll do that, you know.
If I if there's someone in there going at it,
I gotta get out of there. But then where do
(10:39):
we go? Is there only one bathroom on this floor
for each you gotta go to another floor. That was
a big debate yesterday morning, a bunch of other DJs.
We're talking diskoying. They're like, where do we go? Like
and he's like, oh, I have a secret one. Yeah
we heard there's another one like upon the twelfth floor.
They're supposed to be magical. How are you going to
get all the floor? The tenth floor? And how do
(11:03):
people not know about? It? Is in a special place
down a dark hallway. I don't know. It's a dream
world up there. Oh oh they have catering. They have
iced coffee up there the tenth or twelve shut up?
Yes yeah, yesterday they well yesterday made up catering fifth
floor head catering. Yesterday. I saw the picture. It looks
(11:24):
like an executive bathroom. It has a nice little table
in there with a gold tissue box, Like, I need
to see this bath in there. You're high and mighty
in this company. They want to keep you around. Why
don't you request a private bathroom for us? But because
I asked for other things that for me, We're fine.
(11:45):
We're fine, We're fine, guys, we're fine. We've got beautiful facilities.
If you need to go find another Florida pooh and
go find when we have a great setup. It's hard
to air, it's hard to add a drain hole to
a floor that already exists and plumbing. What are you talking? Well?
Putting it another one? Another bathroom? We do. We have
showers here in this facility. We had one in the
(12:06):
old building. We have to have according to contract, what
after our our union has to have a place to
sleep and shower for those that live here, like some
of us do. Really, I've never heard of that at all.
Where the shower, I don't know. I don't know if
there's one here. I think it's then let's pick it.
(12:30):
Let's blow up, get the rat. Do you think would
be the first person to cross the line so that
we could get some wary here in New York if
you work in a union building like we do. We
did and we do, and if the building is going
against union policy, they will take a big, huge, two
story rat and blow it up and put it in
front of the building so the whole world will see
(12:50):
that you're building is in the wrong. I love a
big rat out fronted to see the rat. I'm like, oh,
I used to beg them to inflate the rat. People
like shut up, But how Are we doing on time?
We're about done? Are we done? Are we guys? Are
we done? You talked about a lot of various just
the last podcast of the week. It is, Yeah, we
(13:12):
don't do them on Friday. All right, Wait, won't say goodbye?
I love you? What's up? All right? I gotta run
back up to you. There's some fifteen minute morning show
Elvis Duran and the Morning Show ON DEMAND News
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