Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:03):
What would you talk about on your on your podcast.
Firm Presents Minute Morning Show. We gather again from the
fifteen minute morning show podcast. Here we go, Elvis, you're
(00:27):
the boss. You can make it like the five minute podcast.
Oh no, no, no, no, I can't change this. This
is uh, this is tattooed on us wherever. Fifteen minutes.
You know where this came from. In the old days
of podcasting, they said, you know what the ideal length
of a podcast is, fifteen minutes? Remember those days? Yeah?
(00:48):
Who is day? By the way? Who just I don't
know the podcast people have. Yeah, the researchers at the
time said, fifteen people, fifteen minutes is all that. Then
you'll lose them. And now podcast last much long. This
is an old rule for our podcast. We could go
on for hours. When I first started here and I
heard about the fifteen minute Morning so I thought it
(01:09):
was so cool and I still think it's so cool
because it's just like something completely different than what we
do for the whole morning. We're gonna go off here
if we want to, which sometimes awesome. We could say
funk if we want ye people want this once we
get back and if we get back to into the
studio together. There you go, we're gonna miss this, so yeah,
we can I guess do this when we get back
(01:30):
into the studio. Hey, um, speaking of saying fun on
the podcast, what was it you said yesterday, Danielle? It
was really funny. It was Oh, I don't know what
was it? Just let it out. I don't I know
what it was was? It was it when Scotty was
doing his thing and I was like, just stick your
hand on your fucking butt crack or something like that. Nate,
(01:55):
don't hold your face like you never heard me talk
like that before. He told him, what's wrong? Do you
think we should start editing our foul language on the podcast?
You know? I think I don't know that the recreation
from Danielle is is is more shocking to me than
what she actually just does it naturally. I think it
(02:16):
appears to be uncomfortable when we start saying funk a
lot on the podcast, like he gets because you know,
I'm not in my normal position, and it's not a
normal time that we do this podcast. We're recording it
when the show is technically still on. So for a
second there, I get nervous thinking that we're saying it,
and it's somehow going out over Wait a minute, can
(02:38):
we say that right now? Now? You're okay, you're safe.
I always thought the idea for the podcast is something
that you can get there that you can't get from
the big show. And I think cursing is the most obvious,
which is also why. But if we force it just
because we can do it, I think it's a bit much.
Spider Man theory comes natural. None none of us, Yeah,
(03:02):
none of us, Carson, real life. I have to go
do something upstairs for I'll be back in one minute.
Would you please carry on? He's not coming back all
the time. I'm coming back. I've got to go do
something off the podcast and do it. I don't have
to go pooh, I don't know if to go. Thanks
(03:22):
for asking me, But you guys, can we call him
other things that trigger Nate because I think he's triggered
by the word but hole to whenever we say butth hole.
I see him pull his hair, Like if you look
at his hair right now, he's been pulling it all morning.
He's got justin Timberlake hair right now. What is it
about but holes that bothers you? Because I think you
guys know this. I think probably like three or four
(03:44):
years ago, we would have never said but hole. You
know what I mean, really really come on bart ships
and has been saying it on cartoon Yeah yeah, like
up greater. He's saying that word back and forth on
the playground, like you butt hole. I felt like it
one was the scientific to and too. It's like a
little kid term, isn't there isn't there a song? But
(04:05):
holy oh? I feel like we're getting away with a
lot more these days, Like did Elvis say dick hole
on the air one day that I think he did
it again to medical terms. Have you listened to other
podcasts and how they talk? Okay, yeah, but he said
(04:28):
on the airs what Nate saying on there. But I
think I'm back scientific orifice. You're fine. Dick hole is
a thing I don't think any Yeah, we're talking about
we were talking about that trigger because he's been getting
weird about butthole lately. I see him pull his hair
(04:49):
whenever we talk about but I'll tell you and Scary
has been around on our station long enough to know.
In the old days, we used to play a song
by the Butthole Surfers, but we were not allowed to say,
butth hole that at some point, at some point in
the past. I think once Gandhi arrived, our language got
(05:09):
a little more suggestive. Yeah, so that's how we were
talking about dick hole, because Gandy was saying that the
word dick hole is not acceptable. And then that's when
you walked back and I could I could have sworn
Elvis one day on the air, you said somebody was
a dick hole, but I'm not. I love saying I
(05:30):
think dick hole is worse than being an asshole because
the dick hole is much smaller, so you're just much
smaller of a person. You know, this may sound weird,
but we've used asshole so much it's just doesn't have
that same Zane hold on, Brody, you haven't said anything
about dick holes or assholes or anything. When did you?
(05:50):
When did you sign? On? A couple of minutes late, Um,
they're tearing up my street for the water company, and
so they rang my bell. I parked my car on
the street. I had to go move it. Sorry, okay,
I love that song tearing up my street street. I
had to go turn off the house alarm because someone's
(06:11):
coming over to do some work upstairs. That's where I went.
All right, all right, So back to the usage of
the word dick hole. What other words I mean, obviously
in the obvious, but what other words creative words would
you like to use on the air that you can't
use Elvis, because you you do have a lot of
creative words that you put together like a ru Yeah
(06:35):
this is And I wish we could use the word
fuckory as like an actual noun, like somebody is practicing.
That would be great. Yeah, I like and things around
the radio station when like something goes bad, like a
piece of equipment fails, we say, oh that thing ship
the bed. That's what you said yesterday it was a
(07:00):
pig fun Well, so this morning someone sents a text him.
We were talking about spraying in the bathroom after you
go take a pooh, and they said, if you use
a citrus scented spray it was they called it shittress, right,
So I'm like, can can I say shittress on the air?
(07:20):
If it's the name of a product, you should be
You could say ship's creek. You should be able to
say Brodie. There was a long time that we were
afraid to say ship's creek. You eventually realized we gotta
say ship's creek, right, It's funny on TV show sign
If the name was Fox Creek, could we say it, yeah,
(07:42):
it was Yeah. What if it was f you c
h s creek, fox Creek? Could we be able to
say it books fo fuchs creak like a phdu c
k looks creek? What if it was motherfucker Pond? I'd
(08:02):
watch that show, you know, Elvis I used to work
and I worked at a radio station in Tampa. We
had this older engineer and he would say, you would
go in and you know, you take something to the
engineers and you go, what's wrong with it? I go,
I don't know what's sucked up? What the fund does
that mean? Like, won't you tell me what it's not doing?
(08:23):
Why did you come in here and say it's fucked up?
I'm like, I don't If I knew what it was
doing wrong, I fix it. I don't know, Like it's
just a better term to just go, what's wrong with it?
I don't know. It's fun up. I don't general I mean,
it doesn't really describe the problem. It means it doesn't work.
That's what it means. Hey, Garrett, do you have kids
in your house? Is this why you can't take a
(08:44):
part in this conversation because I can't know. Trust me,
they've heard a lot during quarantine, so uh kind of
like have they started repeating words back to you? We're
if we're not days away, probably today might be the day.
So yeah, I'm like, dick hole, Oh yeah, come September, Garrett.
(09:10):
A dick hole is like an asshole. It's not the
real hole. It's it's a figure of speech. Um so,
So Trevor is what the producer of the Jim Kerr
Classic rock morning show next door and every morning he
(09:31):
comes in at this time yesterday, he comes in and
sees Scotty's ass crack hold on, and he's just giving
me this hellish look. He just popped through the door
as we're all talking about dick holes, and he's like,
what do on this side of the building. Trevor's wife
is pregnant. He's got to learn all this stuff fast.
(09:54):
Could we possibly do tomorrow's fifteen minute morning show podcast
with absolutely no profoun none? Because I think I think
we're relying on it too much. Think if we don't
do it, we don't make the people happy, give what
they want. I think we can make people happy by
(10:14):
not using foul languor he's got a great idea. What
about on Friday? What if we don't do it on Friday?
No cursing on Friday's podcast? Yeah, Friday, exactly, last podcast
on Froggy last last Friday, we didn't do a podcast.
Daniel still curse twice. So the question is, uh, if
(10:36):
we're not doing a podcast and Daniel curses, does anyone hear?
It's a stupid fucking question, is set? And speaking of swearing,
I remember listening to one of the first Howard Stern shows.
You know, he's on serious radio now and there's no
restrictions on what he can say. And I remember that
(10:56):
first day he goes, Okay, we're making a conscious effort
not swear, and that I was listening to the same
show because he said, let's not just swear because we can,
let's do it when we need, let's not take advantage
of it. Where get him lawn? And and then Brodie
just poured Did you not hear Brodie poor a soda
(11:19):
while we're doing anyway? Microphones? Microphones? Microphone is a little
too good. We can hear your heart beat. But he
has a landscaping outside the window. It must be brody think.
I think that's either me or my neighbor out back.
It's somebody. It's definitely my microphone. It adds reality to
(11:40):
the show. It's totally Yeah. We were long enough for
Nate to tell us the other triggers because we were
just trying to figure out what's making him pull his
hair out today. We figured out butt hole was all
of our cursing was what else is going on with Nate?
So some non verbal triggers, things you do that may
(12:00):
him You you you made me pull my hair out
today with going late, right, Yeah, So the best part
was that he goes We got about a minute and
a half and Elvis was very honest. I gotta be
honest with you. We're not going to be done in
a minute and a half. I'm just telling you we're
gonna be late. My favorite is when I know how
long something is gonna take. You know, we've we've been
(12:20):
doing this long enough. I know how long something's gonna take,
and then you just defy me and say no, we
could get it all in. You gotta trust you, And
I'm like okay, and then the break ends with his
being what I thought we would do and the Okay,
we'll just do it next, like, oh, okay, he does
have to to like schools. First he has the oh no, no,
(12:41):
I'm we're we're gonna make it all happen, and there's
no fucking chance in hell it's gonna happen. And then
the second school is we're just not breaking that that time,
So I don't really care. We're gonna go as long
as I want to go. You know, you know, we
have to have these rules. I'm sorry, Brodie, go ahead,
No no, So I was just gonna say. The other
thing that triggers Nate is when will interview a celebrity
before they come in the studio and he'll say, she's good,
(13:03):
just don't ask her about her ex boyfriend, and Elvis goes, oh,
I'm gonna ask her. I'm gonna ask. And then and
then as soon as Elvis asked, you've seen Nate just
melting in the corner like impressions. By the way, Yeah, thanks, Yeah,
You're not that easily triggered, are you? No? Not anymore?
Two strokes, It rolls right off your good What other
(13:33):
good things came from? Strokes go. I can get a
lot of ships. So you know, I don't have a
lot of stress because I forget a lot of things.
Had the rest of you become very forgetful during these
pandemic times I have. I do feel a little more scattered,
like when I had some more organization to my day.
I think my brain just processed things better. Now I'm
(13:55):
kind of all over the place. Yeah, I have no
focus whatsoever. I don't even know who you people are,
what we're doing here? Where are were you? All right?
So tomorrow we're going let's try to do just just
for the hell of it, Let's try to do a
non dirty worded fifty minute morning show podcast. Can we try?
I'm not showing up. We've been down the road before,
(14:17):
We've been down this road. I just won't turn on
my microphone quiet. I love how on the show we
run late, but here we run early. You notice that
because we're just trying to get out of here exactly
we're going nowhere? All right? I think we're done? Are
we done? How many minutes? Hold? Honestly, what's behind Brody today?
(14:42):
I can't see nothing? Plug the long guy? No nothing today?
I had everything set up and uh, I decided against it,
So tomorrow maybe there'll be something. Second, what did you do?
What was it? It was a bad idea? Well, I
had a whole bunch of Harry Potter lego castles that
(15:03):
I was going to put out, but then I realized
that my daughter would yell at me if I touch
your Harry Potter castles. So yeah, yeah, all right, I
got it. Makes sense if you break that. Yeah, you
don't want to mess with that? All right? Well, perfect
tomorrow A non offensive fifteen minute morning show podcast, Can't wait?
See you there? The fifteen Minute Morning Show