273 - What instruments can the Morning Show Play? 7/16/18

Piano, Drums, The Recorder are just some of the things we can TRY to play. Plus Kathleen was CRAZY at band camp!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:02):
What would you talk about on your on your podcast
Firms Represents show. All right, something happened over the weekend,
right yeah? World Cup? Right now? Yes? You temperature hit

(00:23):
and I degrees in New York City for Steel Day.
That was Saturday, Saturday. Yeah, by the way, bus steal Day.
We used to have a French restaurant around the corner
from where our studio is. And they're the best chicken
wings I've ever had. They were cropsical sticks and we
were right lollipops. That's a look like lollipops. I don't
know how you do that. How do you get the

(00:44):
chicken to be like on the end like a ball
and had a handle magic, I just eat it, but
that's now. They flipped it up and they put the
skin around it. They actually, uh I saw, I saw
how they did it once. That was one of the
only two reasons I ever cared about bust Steal Day
was always used to take us for lunch. I don't
think chicken wings are a traditional French meal, but it's

(01:05):
it's chicken wings like that. It's like poulette ala wing.
It was that. It was something like and then that
whole street would close down for like a street fair.
So I'm like, oh, it's a busteel day. Elvis takes
us to lunch, and then the first song I ever
learned on guitar was bust Steel Day by Rush. You
play the guitar so much, you don't know about me
and the play. I used to a little bit, a

(01:27):
little bit, not on I wouldn't play in public, no,
but I used to play the cello. And then I
took guitar classes and lessons. For years. I can't play anything.
But my guitar teacher in school and high school was
a fan of the band Rush. They had a song
called Bustel Day, which the court structure was very simple,
so he wanted us to learn that, and so that's
one of the first songs I learned. Wow, I didn't
never know that I had piano, play piano, and everything

(01:52):
has gone out of my brain and I can only
play the beginning of a Whole New World from Aladdin
for the first few cards. How the hell is that
the only thing I could show you the world? And
then that's it. Um. I could play the opening to
Stay Away to Heaven, the first player. Yeah, I took guitar.

(02:16):
They had to restring it for a lefty. It was
just it was so embarrassing, you like the Jimi Hendrix
of the show. You know, I'm left handed and in
high school I had to take band. It was part
of the part of the curriculum, and I'm like, sorry, guys,
I'm not learning on a righty guitar. So they legitimately
took a right handed guitar and I get to flip
it around because it's a mirror image of itself, right,

(02:38):
But then they had to take the strings and restring
it because it was the wrong way. Mirror image is
not what happens when you flip a guitar over. When
you flip it, it's no, it's not mirror now, it's
upside down. That's when they were images or image is
the same. It's not upside down. Its symmetrical. Though. No,
it's not semantics. He's not semetric. What's it's not because

(03:02):
the pick guard is up as on the top. Now,
I told you that they strong, They did not. Why
didn't they just give you a left hand and guitar
because they're cheap bastards and all the pegs are in
the wrong place. You play, like, why you just learn
how to play an instrument. They didn't record like wood blocks.
Why don't you just play right because my strong hand,

(03:22):
my strummer is my left hand strong. But see you
played the opposite way first off, So what about did
you play any instruments? No? No, I wanted to play
the piano, but my mom's excuse to me was we
can't afford piano lessons, So yeah, I didn't. I could
teach you a few notes, teach you the world. It's

(03:44):
so great when you when there's a baby grand piano
at a party or somewhere. I sit down and I
start playing it. Everyone gets so excited and then it
stops and I go, that's all I know. See, I
knew somebody that would do that. He knew the opening
lines like five songs and he just sit and started playing.
And it was like, oh my god, you're big. Can't
can't And he only knew like the first So we

(04:05):
had John Legend in here and we had one of those.
We had the piano right in the studio where we
are right now before we build out our new studio,
and I started playing. John goes, oh man, I go,
I'd love to have I had a friend like that.
It played guitar. He didn't. He couldn't afford lessons, so

(04:25):
he would sit and figure out songs at home, just
figure out the notes, and so he would only know
like the first couple of measures of every hard rock
song he liked, so that he would just play the
beginnings and then go and then he would like maybe
learn the easy part in the middle. Then he would
just what he would play, Okay, then it goes all right,
then it goes Because he couldn't play the solo and
he couldn't play they really fast parts. He would just

(04:46):
do the the easy parts and he would like, play
that for you. Yeah, that's not fun, that's not fun.
It would be like counting one, three, seven, ten, like
instead of doing the whole one to ten, he would
just play little parts of each song and go and
then it goes all and then it goes. That's it.
The musical instruments are so hard. I tried to I
actually tried to learn how to play guitar because I

(05:07):
felt like that was a great way to meet women.
It's so difficult college college, though. All you need to
do is just strum the guitar with the door open,
and it's just like the pie Piper. They come in.
All you have to know is wonder Wall. All you
know is wonder Wall, and you're you're, you're set for life.
Garrett was getting getting laid by the time. It was
a whole new world. Oh yeah, and that's all. That's

(05:27):
why I stopped. I played the recorder in the everybody
Crush Buns, Hot Crush Buns, three blind mice, the same song, right,
and you know no, no Bob Bob, black Sheep, three
blunts women right, Hot crush Buns. Right, it's the same song.
But anyway, Yeah, it was a plastic recorder, and I
just knew, I just yeah, is that even an instrument?

(05:50):
I don't think. I don't think any orchestra has a record.
It's not part of any song. There's no recorder, but
there's no kazoos and and what is But isn't the
introduction to like flute? And Okay, so that's my question,
what is the introduct What is the next step that
plays clarinet? Well, that's what everybody in all the junior
high school, high school, it was clarinet. The recorders, Like

(06:11):
the junior it's like the poor man's clarinet because you play, yeah, Kathleen,
what does she know about blowing across the honest, she's
a flout exactly right, yea, make all your jokes before
she walks in the room. Yeah, microphone, this is crazy.

(06:31):
Just playing the organ over there by Sam over the
right here. Hey, So we're talking about instruments, and Scary
was saying that the recorder is like the training wheels
of flutes. I don't think that's the case. Clarinet comes next. Uh,
it's the training wheel of all instruments. Really, I mean,

(06:53):
I guess, I guess, I guess. Technically, recorder is a woodwind.
It's considered a woodwind, you know, it's flashed, even though
it's classic, and both flutes and clarinets are woodwinds. So
you play across you play, you blow across it? Right? Yes?
You don't blow into it? No you yeah, you blow

(07:14):
across it, not into no tea like a harmonica. No
do you choose the flute? It just doesn't seem like
a very uh you know what, It's like the most
useless instrument ever. Really. And then when I got to
college and I was in the marching band, I had
to learn to play the piccolo, which isn't all that
different because flutes you can't even hear them. Really. Yeah,

(07:37):
I think I played the flute because this neighbor in
my like a girl that I idolized, played the flute
and I was like, oh, I'll play the flute. Now.
Did you find the rats would follow you out of
town when you play? I played the flute as well.
That was the instrument I chose, But I could never
get any sound out of the pickol up. There was
just one time it was hard to blow that damn. Yeah,
I know. When I was in the marching band, I couldn't.

(07:59):
I couldn't play and walk at the same time. So
fake playing while I was walking, and I couldn't read notes,
so I would write in all A B that's terrible.
Wait whose daughter is playing the or whose son is
playing the recording? We were discussing talk and we were
talking about playing musical instruments, and I never really was musical.
Scary said he played the recorder, which an upside down guitar. Yeah, yeah,

(08:23):
because I was a lefty. And yeah, I don't know
if the record, I don't know if the recorder counts
is really playing an instrument. I don't think it's an instrument.
It's an instrument, but it doesn't really like the triangle.
But that is the introduction to instruments in school. My
kid just did it. And that's like, and then your
next step is to pick your instrument. You know what

(08:44):
you want. My son played drums, so he played drums
in school and then but that's you know, wait past tense.
Did he quit while he took he was taking private
drum lessons and so the band at school knew he
was good it and they kept saying, we need you
in the band. And my son's answer was, yeah, that's

(09:05):
way too early for me to get up. I'm not
going to be doing that. But he took private jum lessons,
but he wouldn't get up early enough. You don't have
a drum kid at home, did you? We do not.
That's the next step is getting drums at home. That's
when he stops playing drums. When you and Sheldon, how
about the embarrassing instrument the susaphone. The person in the
band that has stand behind everybody and the freaking susophone

(09:26):
wraps around your entire body, has a horn that faces
the same direction you're walking. Yeah, and you're always like
looked at like everyone's staring at me because I stick out,
you know what I'm saying. Yeah, I don't know if
I ever wanted to be the suphone. That always made
me curious. The kids in the marching band and kids
in band in general. You know, there's an instrument that
nobody wants to play, the tuba. Yeah, the tuba. I mean,

(09:49):
like who wants to play that. There's this whole thing
with band kids, and there's a hierarchy about which what
instruments the cool kids playing in the hot kids. So
I was in the marching band in college, and the
ultimate boy to hook up with is a guy from
the drum line. Like if you have you have a
boyfriend from the drum line. They're the hot guys, Okay,

(10:12):
But then nobody wants to hook up with the big
brass instruments because because they're they're like they're not hot.
And yeah, players got women because you have to be
like a certain height and a certain weight to carry
that thing around. It's happy because it's like really heavy.
The trumpet players. Trumpet players were always really a violin guy. No,

(10:35):
there's no violin VI. I was always but the drum guys,
the drum major the drum line guys. They were because
they were the ones that were like you know, the
rebels at the school and when like the snare drum guys,
or like the ones beating the big but the whole
drum line, they were the hot guys. I would find
the player really hot, not like the best. How can

(11:01):
you say the cello is the big bass? Isn't that
a basis? It's like saying the meat ball is, like
is the sausage scary? There's no woodwinds, there's no wood No, no,
I'm sorry, there's no there's no cello in the marching
band violin hold on. In my defense, uh, my fellow
cellis and I were in the marching band. There you go.
We had to sit in the chairs, so we would
run up ahead, sit down in the chair, play, and

(11:24):
then when the band caught up, we would take the
chairs and run forward with the chairs. By describing this, right,
I don't know. I'm imagining a cello to be a
stand up bass guitar. Isn't that what a That's what
a bass is, you, dick? A cello is so huge,
scary you can't walk a hot I played the cello,
Why don't you ask me the cello was a little

(11:46):
bit of the same notes, and isn't it the same
as would be the bass? Okay, let me tell you, guys.
I had a boyfriend my freshman year in the drumline,
and he was over twenty one, so I basically hit
a jackpie. I had the hockeye and she could buy
me alcohol high school. He was when I was a
freshman in college and he was over twenty one, and

(12:09):
I was in the merchant band, and we go to
band camp and it's filthy, y'all hook up with each other,
getting naked at night, and oh my god, band camp was.
We were so bad. We were so bad. Did you
just google? Is the cello a bass? Gary cello is
a little bit larger than guitar. It's about more and

(12:32):
a half feet hot. I know what it looks like.
I'm talking about, what does it sound like. It has
four strings like a bass guitar. If you're the violin
has four strings, that viola has four strings. If they
all have four strings, the bass doesn't sound like a
cello coming from someone who played the cello here, I'm
not sure where you're going with this. Okay, let's talk
about Flukes fifteen minute morning show