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December 6, 2017 16 mins

Web Girl Kathleen gave the guys on the show some tips on gift giving this year!

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Speaker 1 (00:00):
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talk about on your on your podcast? Firm Elvis Presents

(01:13):
Morning Show. All right, here we go. Interesting panel today.
I like it very much. I'll tell you why I'm here.
Scary's here, it's not Brodies here. Hello, Garrett is here,
and Nate is here. So what do we all have
in common? We're all dudes, exactly. It's a sausage fest.
So we need one brilliant woman to come in and

(01:33):
save us in this conversation. So the one and only
web girl Kathleen is here. She always brings class to
every room she walks into. Oh you're very kind. Yes,
if class, if class could be spread like glitter. You
know what they say about glitter. What they say the
harpies of the art world. It really is. By the way,

(01:56):
two days ago all of us had glitter on our
faces and we couldn't figure out why. It's those elf boots.
They're right under the vent and the path is blowing
the glitter off the shoes onto everybody. Because I'm going
home with glitter every freak day. Alright, Well, so I'm
glad you're here, Kathleen. What are you eating? It smells delicious,
So I'm eating some homemade soup with candellini beans. Awesome
beans are so good, so Mediterranean diet of you? Is

(02:18):
that class that you're bringing in? That's the gas. All right,
let's talk about it. It's tis the season to be
out shopping. We need to start thinking seriously about what
we're getting them for Christmas, for for hanak At, whatever
the thing is is. Some of us don't have the
brain power or real estate in our heads to be thoughtful,

(02:39):
to think it through. Because I know, for instance, my
boyfriend Alex, when I opened that gift on Christmas morning,
it's always the most thoughtful. Oh my god, how did
you think of that? Oh my goodness, I never knew
that about Alex. He's I mean, beyond tremendous. I get
a tear in my eye because it's everything he always
gives me is so well thought out and so just
to the point, I'm the world's worst at that. So

(03:02):
Scary and I share the same thing. Well, give him
a gift card, you know right, gift cards, bottles of
liquor or cash for every big occasion. For the last
five years, I have picked out every gift that Scary
has purchased for his girlfriend. And you're not supposed yes
I have, well no, but you know what your girlfriend
should be impressed that you're actually getting consultation and and
web girl Kathleen is a great person to web girl

(03:23):
Kathleen emailed me in November, no joke, say this is
what you're getting Robin for this Christmas. Not I didn't
even open the link. I don't even know what it was.
I will, but ahead it's a surprise. Here's the thing
about gift giving, you have to think outside the box.
Like the one thing that I'm loving that people are
giving this year and it keep seeing commercials on TV.
Actually gave it to my husband for his birthday. Is

(03:45):
um that DNA test where you figure out where your
ancestors are. Yeah, dot Com. I like things and experiences
that don't take up space in your house, your closet
because people already have too much. Yeah, we have way
too much crap. And it's all good trap but it's
just we just we have enough of that and that's
the problem year round. If we need something, we go
buy it. Exactly It's twenty three and me the new

(04:06):
buy you a Star? No will they say that they're
these things are accurate. Buying you a Star? You have
no fucking clue or that start. I have to spit
for my own gift. I feel like it's not really
a gift if you're buying, if you're buying for a
lady in your life. I started have one rule that

(04:27):
I like people to stick by. What's that it shouldn't
be shouldn't plug in unless it's a vitamix, Right, and
mixes are fantastic, and they're very expensive and they're very luxurious.
But what about a kitchen aid blender. No, well, kitchen
aid blenders are great, but the vitamics you could actually
put a car in there and it would grind it up.
It's the best anything sexy blender. But other than that,

(04:48):
don't get your lady anything that needs the plug in. Okay, alright,
good unless they request it. Like Scotty got his wife
a dishwasher one year or vacuum another year, and she's like,
these are things like clean the house. This is then okay.
So the question is this. It seems like we shouldn't
have to ask this, but I'm going to ask in anyway,
from the shallow point of view, what should we be

(05:09):
paying attention to throughout the year and especially now it's
crunch time? What do we what should should we be
looking forward to direct us to the perfect personalized gift. Well,
if the person that you're buying for has a Pinterest page,
that's number one. Number two is you need to go
on their Facebook page and see the things that they like,
the brands that they you know, they get regular news

(05:30):
from talking. Yes, you can stock their social media accounts
and see what they're interacting with and on Instagram to
what they're liking exactly, see what accounts they follow on
Instagram because that could point you in the right direction
of something that they actually truly love. Okay, all right,
very good. Now as far as experiences go, because I
think we all agree if you have a lot of clutter,
you have a lot of stuff in your life. You

(05:51):
know what stuff is great, It goes away and it's
gonna be in in a dump somewhere just you know,
decomposing eventually. But experiences will be in your mind and
in your heart until you know, until you forget, until
you can't remember things. So what are great experiences? Because
what can you do not only for someone as an experience,

(06:12):
a place to take them or a thing to enjoy,
but what can you give in their name that they
would be so proud to be a part of. You know,
if you have a friend who's taking a vacation, has
a big trip coming up, and maybe you don't have
a lot of money to spend on this friend, Like
you don't have money to buy them a plane ticket
or buy them dinner at the on their trip plan
plan do all the planning for them, Make a word document,

(06:34):
find out all the cities that they're heading up, make
a list of the best bars, all of the sites
to see, all of the best places to eat, and
the cuisine that that city is known for. Like, do
the planning for them. That would be a great free
grant gift that wouldn't cost you anything. So thinking about
what they need to think about, but you're actually helping
them out. I'm also I also go off the fact
of how does it change their life? Like if you

(06:55):
buy like an object, uh, that isn't really going to
change their life? Is it really a good gift? You
know what I mean? If it's like something simple like
a like a brush or a video game, They're going
to use it and enjoy it, but they won't use
it for the rest of their life. So what is
something in their life that that I could get for
someone that will help them improve their lifetime gift. Yeah,

(07:18):
Like if I were going to get a gift for
Garrett and his wife Ali, I would give them five
coupons for free babysitting. That's invaluable when you have kids.
That's not lifet. I need a kidney. Like, if someone
could give me an extra kidney, that would be like
a lifetime. Okay, give them your kidney. Do you need
a kidney? Are you telling us something we need to know?
I probably could use one of something like that. I
don't know. I don't know, Kathleen. I think I would

(07:39):
challenge you in the gift giving department. I think I
can we love a challenge. Okay, you go shopping with
your significant other, maybe you're just out for the day.
You just gotta plant very impromptu. You go to several
stores and you just take notes, that's all you do, Like,
Oh that looks really great. Oh I really like these shoes. Well,
but it always asually turns out to be something you

(08:01):
saw in December. Because look at Alex. Back to my boyfriend,
he pays attention year round. I mean he he will
recall something that I got all freaked out about in
February and all of a sudden it ends up under
the tree. How good I am? Well, I know, but
we should all be thinking this way. I feel like
a total asshole because I'm not as plugged into others

(08:22):
as I should. I'm the worst. And I can't drop
hints on me either, because it's like you have to
hit me in the head with a ton of bricks,
because I don't realize you're trying to say, I really
like that. Yeah. Plus, sometimes they want something in March
and they don't want it again in November, like they're
done with it. Your sweet spot is late September through November.
So I went shopping. We went shopping in October. I
think we were just walking around. We went to in

(08:43):
a shoe store. She tried on a couple of pairs.
She goes, I really like these, there's so much. I
gave them to her today. She was so excited. You cave.
It's it's a it's a holiday. It's a little celebration
that I grew up with called St. Nixt Day. To
anybody when you give shoes, yeah, well you put out
your you right, and then St Nick comes by on
December six, then put something in your shoes. Most of

(09:05):
where stockings came from, like kind of tradition that you
put out a stocking or something. But I'm glad I
don't do that to another gift I have to buy.
I know, eight, are kidding me? Seven? Or small? Well,
here's the thing. At the end of the year is
where we are now. Things always get busier at work,
things get more hectic, Traffic becomes a little slower, the

(09:27):
stores are more crowded. So you already have that that
angst that starts to rise, you know what I'm saying.
So it gets to the point where you feel like
you're you're giving gifts because you have to. You need
to be giving a gift because you want to. It's
something you want to share with someone. You want to
make them feel a certain way. But unfortunately it's like, oh,

(09:47):
I gotta go, just go get it done so you
can scratch it off your list, and you end up
giving them something that's okay, like a Starbucks gift card,
which is nice. Yeah, that's very it's nice, but you
know that they forgot and they went downstairs and got
you something. What about you, plane, What are you telling
your husband Neil that you want for the holidays, what
do you want? You know? Um, I think we're going
to plan a big trip this year, so we're not
going to get each other anything. We're yeah, we're going

(10:08):
to save our money. So how do you do this?
You say, okay, we have to both agree not to
give the other person something. Yeah, and then Christmas morning
you get a box like, damn it, you told me no,
and now you gave me something. Now I don't have
crap for you. You're running the CVS. We stick to
it or um. Something that we like to do also
is you say nothing more than fifty dollars or nothing

(10:28):
more than twenty dollars, and then you stick to that
price point. Here's my feeling on the price in a relationship.
Everybody goes, you shouldn't spend more than fifty dollars. Well,
we'll spend fifty dollars and that's it. If you see
something for a hundred and fifty dollars and you like it,
and you know they're going to be excited for go
out and buy it. Don't be held back by a
number going But that may make them feel guilty, right,
But if it's like, okay, fifty dollars, I can't spend more.

(10:50):
But you see something you know they're going to enjoy,
go out and buy it, like and you know you're
going to enjoy the gift because they got it for you.
And it meant something. I say, if you see something,
no matter what the prices, get it for them. I
once had three gifts in the trunk of my car,
and it depended on what I got, and I picked
out the one that was appropriate because we agreed on
a point, like we're gonna spend fifty dollars, so I
got a fifty dollar gift, I got a hundred and

(11:12):
twenty five dollar gift, and then I got like a
three d and fifty dollar thing. And this is why
I could feel out which the appropriate. What did you
do the other gifts? I return them. That's a lot
of work, is the thing. My wife's birthday is in February,
so I was able to use one of them for
her birthday. But I but I didn't give because because

(11:32):
if you give too much, then they feel like, oh,
all I got you was screed on. You know, but
let's see this is wrong, man, stop you for a second.
This goes back to what Garrett is saying, we really
shouldn't be putting price tags on what you give versus
what you receive. I think that is kind of crappy.
That is, if you're starting out in a relationship. Yeah,
you know. See you're you're from a different school of
You're from a different world. You know. I'm from a

(11:54):
world where you give a gift because you really want
them to have it, and you can. So here it is.
I want to always spend triple what you spend on me.
I don't know why, but that's what I want to do.
That's just because part of it is coming and going. Robin,
I watch it was nine. He tells everyone what you
do every time you buy any gift for anyone, you
always tell us what's on the price tag. And I

(12:15):
don't know why you do it. Bertie tells you how
much he saved, right the opposite. Well, so I don't
know which is one is better than the other. Okay, scary,
But concert tickets for Robin a few days ago. Everyone
in this room knows what he paid for them. Not important,
it's not room right Why Okay? Again this goes back
to this. Why are we putting a price tag a

(12:35):
number on a gift? A gift is from the heart. Look,
you know, some people can afford to buy more than
others can afford to buy. So if you're in and
if you're a couple, let's say one of you has
a job you make a lot of money and your
partner doesn't make it as much money. Do you really
think there's gonna be a problem. There's there's problem if
he's overspend or underspend. Totally on board. I like to
look at it like a challenge, like this year, since

(12:56):
we're planning a trip, or just probably get each other
something small, and the challenge just under twenty dollars, who
can get the most creative, funny gift that the other
person really likes. Okay, the link you sent me is
not for a creative funny gift. I sent a link
with diamonds and it's scary to get for Robin. Yeah, back,
Kathleen has champion at cast. You're wondering what the diamonds cost.

(13:17):
We'll find out, so he'll let us know. Blet. If
you're feeling generous scary, I'll take one to not for nothing.
But you love everything that I ever bought. You're like,
oh my god, those boots, Oh my god, that was
because I picked it all out. Robin loves it. And
then let's say you have to buy a gift for

(13:37):
that person who admittedly, and you know for a fact,
is they're being honest, they don't want anything. They just
don't want it. And so so that's where the gift
of an experience is where it's at. It could be
a basketball game or a date night date and just
dinner in a movie and you plant it in advance,
or you know, maybe there's a town that's an hour
and a half away, so on the weekend, you guys

(13:59):
can go a wife for a weekend. You you pay
for maybe a night in a little hotel and you
take him out to dinner in this in this in
this town. It's an experience, you know it, get out
of town, you know, so get creative, you know, I
don't know. It's gift giving, Like I said before, should
not be something that makes you sad. There shouldn't be
it's supposed to be festive. We shouldn't be having all

(14:20):
these rules that we set upon ourselves. It must be
caught costing this and it can't be that. And you
can always d I y your own gift. You can
make it go to the craft store. I did that
when I was in second grade. Yeah, I'm gonna give
you a macaroni art piece. You're so you're so quiet
away giftsman, I was just thinking about the the gifts
that don't cost any money. My mom, I gave her

(14:42):
a gift, I don't I think it was in fourth
or fifth grade. I made her an ashtray. And she
doesn't even smoke, and she still has that and it's
always sitting on her nights so she can eat cereal
out of it. Oh no, you can't. This piece of
piece of ship. Yeah, jewelry. She has it sitting there
and there might be little her rings in there. So
the little puppy toes made it for true, so you know,

(15:02):
her little boy made it for her, and so it
has memories attached to it, so it's more than just
a stupid ash tray, which I'm sure it's probably it's
probably the worst ash tray. It's awful. You get called
puppy toast still, Yeah, and when I call him that,
he gets mad at me. That's this one from my mom,
not you. Yeah, you guys are exchanging gifts, like, here's
a gift for you, here's a gift for me. Do
you like to give you a gift first, see the reaction,

(15:24):
then open up yours or do you like to open
up yours and then at the same time. I like
to go first, because well I like to go second.
I like to give the gift, so then I know
how to react off of the one I get again gift,
the gift thing is turning into something. It's the whole science.
I need to know that she liked what she got,
and then I know whether I should overreact you. If
they do have multiple gifts from you, you do want

(15:46):
to say the best for last? Do we all agree
on that one? Kathleen. We want to thank you for
helping us out. Actually did help a lot of people today. Kathleen, Everyone,
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