122 - Tampons! 10/5/17

Is it a good idea for Nate to buy tampons for his girlfriend??

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:02):
What would you talk about on your on your podcasts
old lady like of you. I'm sorry, I just keep
firing all day. I hope the intern doesn't. Oh my god,
I'm getting over a stomach virus. So I've had gastro

(00:25):
and testinal issues, Kathleen, Yeah, both ends, Yeah, at both ends.
And I was in Trader Joe's on Sunday, and oh
my god, I feel bad for the person who had
to clean the bathroom after I was well. Gregg couldn't
be here today, but we have a replacement. Hi, Kathleen,
all right, we also have Brodius here. I'm here, and

(00:47):
Bethany Scary is there, and Nate is there. Yeah. You know,
I was talking to Kathleen about her stomach issues and
she said, you what, You threw up twice on Tuesday. Yeah.
I haven't thrown up in twelve years. Yeah. Think we've
talked about this before, but I haven't thrown up. I
hate the physical act of throwing up. It makes me
literally sick, like I can't even think I'll repress and

(01:08):
suppress that urge to vomit. You didn't throw up the
night that you got thrown out of that bar. No, no,
I haven't thrown up from drinking drinking because you were
so hammered since I was twenty one, so that's sixteen years.
Has just joined us. Hi, I love throwing here. It
looks beautiful. It's like when you're so queasy and you're
sick and you throw up and you get immediate relief. Yes,

(01:30):
you know, I threw up on New Year's Day and
I felt the same way. I was so queasy and
before that, and then once it's gone, it's like, I
feel great a marathon. Are we talking about? Liking? Throwing
up just plays relief when you're so nauseated and so sick.
When I have a migraine and I throw up, it
really does reset my system. Really, But I don't like.
I don't like the feeling. No, I hate it. Oh God,

(01:51):
I don't like the clog nose, running eyes afterwards. Like
that's my problem with throwing up. It's when your nose
get and your eyes start turning red and you walk
out of the bathroom and everybody knows you threw up
because you look like you have a cold. That's the
pot of bothers me the most. I get um so
nauseated after I throw up, like the next day, I

(02:14):
feel like I've been hit by a truck. Okay, here's
my question though. When you throw up, let's say, you know,
in a hurry, and you get a little Let's hear
in a public place, like a restaurant, you're thrown up
in the bathroom and you get some on the seat
or on the rim. That's hold on, hold on, it's
your responsibility to clean it, right, yes, yes, okay. I
want to show because sometimes you walk in there and
you see that the person. Well, sometimes you go and

(02:37):
you see the person before you either pete or threw
up or whatever. You should clean. Oh, Kathleen, pooping a
farting out of But that's not a problem. Can I say,
somebody ate like something really nasty in here and it
smells so bad I want to vom. It's like it's
like a egg sandwich or something. Let's talk about something

(02:57):
else that's not going to make our people sick. Sorry,
I'm having a podcast problem. I have to excuse myself. No,
I need you for this. Hold on, and I need
Bethany and Kathleen to chime in as well. Well. When
you hear my topic, you'll know I didn't say how
about me. We all do multiple podcasts, and sometimes before
this podcast starts, we go who has something? But scary

(03:17):
and I are recording the Brooklyn Boys podcast today and
I don't want to bring anything into this one that
I may need for my other one, the other one,
the other one. So that's pretty selfish game, all right,
So would you have brought into this? Well? I have
a couple of rants I have. I have a problem
with what. I had an argument with my daughter yesterday
who now drives, And that's gonna be one of my
rants because we rant. I have a rant segment on

(03:38):
the Brooklyn Boys podcast, And if we didn't have that segment,
I would, Hey, I have this great star salad, but
I'm gonna see it for the Brooklyn Boys podcast. So, so,
Acquired Taste, ladies, do you guys have something that you're like, Oh,
I would have brought it up, but I gotta say
it for the Quiet Taste brought something up? Well, yeah,
yea vomit? Did you talk about that on Acquired Taste?
That is not an acquired tast? You know, we did

(03:59):
an episode on some farts and Beth he said she's
never farted in her whole life. To talk about that subject.
It's so gross, by the way, being so gross. I
was about to click on the most recent podcast episode
of Acquired Taste and saw the title, and I was like, okay,
I'm gonna skip this one. Are you not with sure
enough to handle it? Well? I don't know if it
applies to me, but menstruating? Yeah, is that's how he

(04:19):
gets I knew right away. I didn't even have to
see the title. When it comes to feminine body things,
he freaks out. I feel weird. I feel weird. We're
listening to it. I'm like, this is for women. Should
hear it? If your girlfriend Robin asked you to go
buy her tampons, could you do it? Yeah? Why not?
There you go your girlfriend. He only cares about menstruating.
Is if if the girlfriend misses one? I don't think

(04:42):
I would know what to do. I know there's there's
like several options, right, there's like heavy Flow or something.
She wrote down her brand and said, get me the multipack,
like if she took a picture on it, Like what
like the Keller the variety pack? Yeah, the variety different? Different, No,
it's different. Nate's still on stage one. There's there's four stages.

(05:05):
What's what's stage of Well? Stage one really is when
you you're in the aisle when she buys them, but
you act like you're not with her. And in stage
two is you'll help her carry like a couple of
boxes to the register. Stage three is you keep them
in your house for her, and stage four is you
go to the store and buy them for Yeah, I
would not know. You're still at stage one where you're like,
I don't know, it's all Greek. I figured it out.

(05:26):
I'll go through her stuff tonight. Take a picture of
the box. Honey. Life pro tip at what are you
doing in my bathroom? Here's what you can't do. You
can't say I got these for you because I sensed
by your mood lately you're probably about to have. Would

(05:48):
that be a great you know, because I do a
little surprise gifts here and there. Would that be a
great surprise gift like a basket of tampa? Maybe not
a gift, but like a surprise like, oh, just so
you know, I grabbed these I thought you might want them.
If a guy prised me with tampons and I didn't
need them or ask for them, I would literally be
the Tasmanian devil. I would destroy it's it's thoughtful. I

(06:11):
think you just have them there. I don't think you're like, hey,
I think you need these. I think it would just
be like, hey, I know, I don't want you have
to worry about whenever you're over. I wouldn't. I wouldn't
give it to you in place of a birthday present.
Yeah exactly, I'm not surprising you at the dinner table
if you buy them for your apartment, if you weren't
living together, and you're like, hey, I just want you
to know if you have a need the emergency, I
got it, you got you covered. That's nice. But you're

(06:33):
already living with hart. I forgot your living together. You're
living together. So you could say, I'm going to the store,
do you need anything. I'm gonna I'm gonna cut this
off of the past because I'm going to buy the box.
I did my underwear drawer, and the next time she
asks me for them, I'm like, well, hey, well look
at this, look what I have right here. You know
what's gonna happen, Nate, She's gonna go through your underwear

(06:54):
draw and go, why the hell do you have a
box of tampons ars, and then I was like, what
do you do to go in through my underwear drawer?
And then you break up? Right? Break up? So what's
waking with having tampons? If you're a guy, you hide
them in your underwear drawer. That drawer do you put
tampon jaz shorts? They go into the bathroom sink. The
guys in college used to soak tampons in vodka and

(07:16):
then put it in their butthole. So that is an
urban legends did it? No? I know a guy did.
His name his name is Rob. I know a guy
who didn't. We call Rob right now because I was
talking about that this very weekend. And they said the
alcohol would burn your butt hole. And you come up

(07:36):
in the ste tampons here and we do a vodka here.
So Nate, you want volunteers, volunteer my butt And there
was a story on the news that girls were doing that. Sorry, Danielle,
Danielle just walked right back. Were talking about butth hole.
I'm not going to volunteer my butt hole, daniel What
do you think? What do you think we're talking about?
What we're talking about? What we're talking about? The bet
with the wax no no, no, no, no tampons and

(08:01):
we go back to what so what was the Acquired
Taste Menstruation podcast? About what it's bad about menstruation? We
were we were playing a game called blank is the
blank of Blank? It's my favorite game to play, which
is where you say, like the mouth is the anus
of the face, or um like highlighters are the loudspeaker

(08:22):
of the writing utensils. So I said, Sam finished the
sentence your period, and she said, is the Civil War
of my body? That was pretty much that was the
title of Acquired Taste. And it's scared off a bunch
of guys. I don't know, it's scared of you, well
just thinking I'm just because I didn't think it applied
to mental I like this game, but now continue right now.

(08:43):
The Brooklyn Boys podcast is the Tom Brady of podcasts.
How that works? I don't know. It's good? And Brady
wasn't deflated. Balls were How do you have to just
start with a word? So I give you something and
then you have to say, it's the blank of right,
So let's start with I got one for the one

(09:05):
that you just had first, Sam, what's that the the
your period? Okay, your period is the red wedding of
my body. That's true, a lot of a lot of drama.
That's very good. Okay, Okay, scary, Okay. Garlic, Garlic is
the bane of my existence. Garlic, Garlic is the I

(09:27):
can't think that fast. Garlic is the is the fruit
of my Italians. Bethany, you sound like you're in a
bad man Italian. Oh my God is back the guy
exactly like he's looking first fruits, the fruit of the

(09:51):
Italian people. Isn't that the olive? No garlic, I don't think,
because we cook with garlic. How does that not makes sense?
I would say garlic is the Steve Urkele of the
kitchen as and it keeps people away and no one
likes too much of it. You guys, here's my glitter.

(10:12):
Is the herpes of party, party favors. I've heard of
that one before. Garlic Garlic is the body odor. It's
not but that garlet have the testicles of the culinary world,
I think, Bethany, Kathleen, you got it because he did
some metaphors. The metaphors, so go ahead, give us some more.

(10:35):
I like that. I have to get my makeup done.
Go around the room. First, you're putting things in you
but not what do you? What are you doing when
I walk in here? Girl? Do we have scary? And
I are doing? I heart now this morning? So Dina's
in here doing our makeups, makeups we have, We don't
how much time, so we're multitesking. You still have four
minutes left? Yes, Europe, I'm gonna say. I'm gonna say

(11:01):
our morning show he's the bane of my existion. Okay, Brody,
our morning show, Our morning show is the Chinese food
of my last meal. Explain yourself, well, I think our
morning shows great and Chinese food is the centerpiece of
what my last meal would be had I been dying,

(11:22):
And I think our show is the centerpiece of people's day.
Oh that makes sense. So if you were dying, you
would you would want to listen to this show before
you were dying. I want eat Chinese food. I'm saying
that our morning show is the Bentley of radio. Yeah,
only rich people listen to it. Yes, I would say

(11:47):
it's Hynday like Sunday. Is their old commercial. That's how
I remember it. Hunda like a Sunday. By the way,
I don't getting my makeup done. Do you ladies go
through this every day? Yes, they do it themselves every day.
I just want to hear scary utter the words. At
the end of the day, I can't wait to get
home to take off them. In makeup, you doesn't know

(12:08):
what to do with the space when you do that. Hey,
can you explain why when you put on eyeliner or something,
you guys open your like your mouth and really stret
your face out more. Really, I'm the expert. Really, I
don't know if you feel like, can we look your
eyes don't move? No, No, I've seen it. I've seen you.

(12:30):
They do this now that you're doing it. But I
don't think there's a reason thing we just can we
just have, like Kathleen, can you just do like a
a photo compilation of all the faces you make when
you put on makeup? Absolutely? I would love to watch that.
I like to refer to that as six ten to
six thirty. That is your makeup? Is that up on

(12:51):
elvistrand dot com? Not? Yeah, she's doing her cheekbones. Look
at that jawline some time. Oh my god. Our program
factor Marc mdine is walking by and he's looking at
here like, what the hell is going on scary. Looks
like he's trying to hold a book up with his head,
like balance a book on the top of his head. Okay, well,

(13:12):
also see his face skin, so his face looks like
he's going hello, you very miss his doubtfire right now,
look at his face. Look at his face? And who
might you be the urge to monopoly? What do you

(13:36):
do with your mouth? Oh? Did you guys see the
Monopoly guy? That was a photo bombing the Senate the hearing?
What happened? There was a guy who was what was he?
What was he talking about? Nate? I only saw the Jeff,
I didn't see the So there was a guy testifying
in front of Congress, and I guess they allowed people
to come in and sit in the gallery. And the

(13:56):
guy had the mustache and the top hat from the
Monopoly Man and the glass and the monocle. And then
during the hearing he took out dollar bills and dried
his face with a hundred dollar bills. It was great
that Monopoly Man was trending Tuesday. I think that's so funny.
I love it when people are like, you know what,
Like there was a baseball game where two guys dressed

(14:17):
as umpires and sat right behind. They do that. That's
a thing they do nationally, and that's funny. Yeah, when
they imitate the umpire and they over exaggerate the calls. Fantastic.
I love it. It makes it fun for everyone to watch.
You guys, did have any hooker stories? Did you? That
was yesterday's podcast, Yester series thing. It was yesterday's thing.
Just wanted to check. Has anyone had a hooker since
yesterday's podcast? Scary? Yeah, because you got makeup on like

(14:38):
a hooker and then a foot hooker once she was
in college. Foker, what does the foot hooker do? You
have five seconds? He gets you off with her feet,
you asked me, is it a footie? Fifteen minute morning

(14:59):
show off