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July 19, 2017 15 mins

We having the WORST bathrooms in ALL time!!

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Episode Transcript

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Speaker 1 (00:02):
What would you talk about on your on your podcast
represents seriously, You're like, you look like you've seen things.
I've seen. I've seen the worst looks like worse than that.

(00:25):
Like you know when someone like almost gets into a
car accident and then they just sort of stare into
the middle distance. That's what scar like, the thousand yards stare.
The smell of hell is what I smell by. It's
a fifteen minute morning. So I'm Bethany Dan yells here.
We have brody, we have NATed, and we have scary.
How sad is it though? The fact that you went

(00:47):
into that bathroom which was utterly destroyed in every way
possible that I want to go investigate it for myself?
What that's disgusting? Why we want to go in? It's disgusting?
Can you try right now? I just said it up?
What happened? Okay? I walk into the men's room and
men's room has two urinals and two stalls. I walk in.

(01:08):
We had both stalls going. But first of all, you
walk in and you're just you're just this pungent stink
just hits you in the face like a wall of
smell the second you walk in. Then I guess that
had been done like five minutes before, because I knew
two new guys were in the two stalls, both of

(01:29):
them cranking. Then you're just going It was like a
machine gun, right, A ta ta tat tat tag. Wait
you could hear everything? Yes, both it was like in
stereo were available. I would have walked out and then
know it gets worse, Danielle, because after that I approached
the two urinals and both of them had urine in them,

(01:50):
So it was just like it was like waiting for
the front. We be honest, before you walked out, you
would have said, hey, what are you doing? Would have
backed outfully. Oh it smells so it's oh my god. Okay,
So I walked in and both urinals are still filled.

(02:13):
It's just utterly yellow. Wait can you flush those? How
do urinals work? You flush them? So? Are they clogged?
What's going on? Well? Some urinals some uninals, they don't
have any Oh what do you do with the handle
to flush them? But don't flush them? And there I
think Scotty b Scott. It Scotty's in there, Scott, he's

(02:35):
grinding one. So okay, so I just peaked in on him.
He's trying to grind one out. But the other toilet
is it's okay, somebody flushed it, but it's obvious there

(02:56):
was an accident in there, so there's definitely get marks leading. Yes,
some of urinals just they have no water in them,
but these do, so you have to actually flush them
otherwise there's water in there. You know, we've often said
that the women's room is worse than the men's room,
but this actually sounds pretty terrible. Yeah, what are you doing?
I think you're coming back. I'm coming back. Don't smell

(03:20):
like poop and walk in this room. Yeah, please walk
through a decontamination chamber first. Yeah, I mean, don't we
have the I Heart Radio decontamination don't we didn't? I
don't know the men's room in our in our floor,
there's a booger picker, right, and the guy would wipe
him on the walls, but then they painted the walls
and they and I'm convinced it's a left handed guy. Why,

(03:43):
because the boogers are wiped to the left, and h
the boogers are on the on the right, So I
feel like he's holding his penis with his left hand
and picking the bugger with the right for analyst, I
think he's back because I had to flush with my
foot at that urinal because there's a booger on the wall.

(04:04):
Anybody who works in an office or a work environment
where you're together all day, this is the relationship you
all have. We're like, we're all friends. Are the people
you see every day, But there's this under relationship that
no one talks about, and that's trying to figure out
who does what in the bathroom. Like there are times
that I walk in and I hear the most horrific sounds,

(04:28):
not only oh my god, wait, I'm trying to remember. Okay.
We had a guest actually come in once and her
mother came with her and they were both in the bathroom,
and I came into the bathroom at the same time,
went to the bathroom and one of them exerted some
effort and then side with relief, and I didn't I

(04:51):
didn't know who it was whatever, but I saw the shoes.
When we came back in, the guests came in and
I recognized the shoes, and it was the mother of
our guests. She had like and she did it right
next to her daughter, like they were talking, and then
the mom was just like making noises and then signed
with relief. Well, I hate to say it, but after
a good one, you do sign with relief. Right. If

(05:13):
you're in a public rushroom, it's a little different one.
Why would you do that, Scotty, I don't know. I
assume that was you. I saw the shoes. Normally, when
somebody walks in, I freeze and I just I'm quiet.
I have to wait until that person leaves. But I
heard you talking. Yeah, Well, we were giving report on
the state of the bathroom, and I'm sorry that I
interrupted your It was so bad. When it was so
bad when I walked in, I had my shirt up

(05:34):
over my nose. Awful, and the worst you didn't help
it out. I'm sorry. But the worst thing is is
that's that's the closest running water we have. So I
washed my fruit in there in the bathroom. Your orange
was brown in the bathroom before. Yeah, that's disgusting. You

(05:58):
eat apple. How about the I from the AM station
who brushes his teeth every morning to say, don't come
to work and do it at home because spits in
the sink. I don't want to see that. And then
and there's a guy in the digital department. Who shaves
in the morning. I don't want to see you shaving.
People are late getting to work and they need to
do these things as long as they're not shaving their
privates in the bathroom. I'm okay, and was open the mail.

(06:20):
That's all I open. I opened the mail Genitalia. I
open the is my passing time on the toilet. That
opening mail, that's all I do. I don't do anything
else on the toilet except I have, you know, and
I sit there so long that my legs fall asleep.

(06:42):
And I can't have you clip coupons for toilet paper
while you're on the toilet. Absolutely, it's just read bottles,
like I'll take the shampoo bottle and I'm just like, well,
what's the ingredients? Because you get bored after a while
and I don't, and you have to go and it's
not a copy gone your parents are like a magazine

(07:03):
wreck in there. Yet I'm the only one that likes
to make chicken pocato. Is that weird? But no capers.
I don't like capers. You're supposed to get back up
and try again. It's like it's like going to sleep.
If you can't fall asleep. In ten minutes you get
back up. No, sometimes if you sit there long enough.

(07:24):
Then Study went to the bathroom with a shirt over
his face, which we've all done. But that means he
had to go to the bathroom so badly he couldn't
walk out and come back, and he couldn't walk about
fifty feet to the private bathroom. How bad did you
have to go that? You walked into that and said
I'm going in colling me. First of all, I refused
to use the private bathroom because it's right in the

(07:45):
lobby and everybody sees you when they come out, and
it's hot in there. For some reason, that excives me
out to be there's a shower in there. Who the
hell showers at work? Okay, what did you do to
yourself in your pants? That was so bad you had
to jump on the shower. Also the reason I don't
like that particular bathroom, it's so empty. It's such a
big space. I feel like if somebody starts jiggling that
door handle, there's no way I can get there. You

(08:08):
have you guys noticed it is so big there? And
again here like so Nate, you said, somebody we know
actually brings a second pair of shoes into their Yeah,
I'll call him out Jod' angels that. Why, well, he

(08:30):
does that because when you're in the stall, that's the
only thing you can see of a person, right unless
you're like sneaking a through the crack of the door. Yeah,
so he brings another pair of shoes so that when
somebody sees him in his office and he let out
a big one, they can't identify him by the shoes.
It's the same with the heads up seven up. When
you would stare at somebody's shoes, you would know who
it was. Same deal with the with the bathroom. Those

(08:52):
are a bust of browns that he wears. You're setting
yourself up for that joke. You know, there's also someone
in this bathroom in the morning that before the show starts,
they go in there, Penny pinch a loafers, sorry not
to be outdone, and they line the seat with no joke,
twenty toilet seat liners. And then they jammed the jam
it in the toilet. When they're done, and they clogged
the toilet. There's poop and toilet paper liners. And they

(09:15):
use Huggies wipes, not even the they use baby wipes.
Not the cottonell ones that you can flush. But the
baby wipes and the piles of them in there, you're
not supposed to use those. They clog up everything. There's
like an island of those in the sewer system, just
like wipes. They're so bad. Even the ones that say
they dissolved actually fable. They do not use those. Really, Yeah,
they're bad. He speaking of the brown word. We have

(09:37):
the clip from the show today. You want to play that, yes,
we'll set out what happened. So we were doing topic
train path you do it, doing top of train and
a woman was telling a story about how bad her
day was going, and she used she said ship. We
had to beap it. But then we went to the
next caller right away and she said, God, I'm so
laughing from when that woman said ship, so that we

(09:57):
had to dump out of it. But here's what you missed.
We had a dumb found ship. It's a it's a yeah,
it's an industry word. Here here is this is from
this morning show unedited. This is what we heard and
you didn't. And then I called the police and then
a bird shit on my head. Okay, okay, hold on
one second, thank you, let's go talk to uh Maria, Maria, Hi,

(10:21):
what's going on? Maria? Okay, all right, I've seen end
up topic train. Thank you. There are certay moments when
Elvis this is like I'm done, and that was that
moment He's done. And that's why this podcast is great
because we can play audio like that. By the way,
we have a corporate rule. We have to delete that
audio now immediately after this podcast because we can't leave

(10:44):
any profanity in the system. But why is ship profanity
like like, that's just as crass. The same thing with
the cash song. We can't play the song Women, which
is a brand new song of our of hers, which
is really uh speaks to female empowerment, and well we
can't play it because she says a mother effort it
yeah a lot, a lot, a lot a lot, and

(11:07):
Elvis felt that the translation is lost when you have
to go yeah, I feel like, you know, like in
England you can get away with certain words, like even
my husband will say things and I go, you can't
say that, and he goes, why where I lived? Where
I lived, it didn't no one cares. That's not a
big deal that word. But here like the p you
you know what, Yeah, they're yeah, here England Australia, you

(11:32):
can say pretty much whatever you want, get away with
a lot crazy. It is really interesting if you go
and look at the rules for like what we can
say and what we can't and the reasoning behind it,
Like if it's referring to a person, it's fine. If
it's referring to a body part, it's not like the
word asked. You can call someone a dick, but you
can't say look at my dick, excuse me, but you
can on the podcast. There's also not a list of

(11:53):
words like because it doesn't say you can't say ship.
It says if someone finds it offensive, they can complain
and you can be fined for it. But if nobody
complains and the guy who works at the FCC here's
you say shit, he's he can't do it about it
the community standards. So the standards in the community with
that specific and let's say you work on let's say
it's how it Sterns show like a crazy rock or

(12:15):
you know, if you are not a listener of his,
but turn it on by accident what he was on
regular radio and you're offended, you can't say, well, you're
not our audience. If you were able to hear it,
you can say you're offended. That's like on the radio
show I did before this one, we would have for
some reason a lot of our listeners didn't understand it
wasn't a kid's show. We would have a lot of

(12:36):
listeners call it and say, my three year old is
listening right now, please don't talk about yeah, And we
were like, you don't let your three year old listen.
But there are a lot of people who you know,
don't do that, and so we had to be really
we had to be super careful. Spencer, my twelve year
almost twelve, commented on something yesterday and I said, turn
the radio off, now, I why are you listening? Well, Mom,

(12:58):
it's on in the background, turn it off. Turn it
off now, that's a good the Mets game. And she's
a Yankee fan, want to go there. Sarah Ferguson the Duchess,
Sarah Ferguson, Nut Ferggy, well Fergy, but not Fergy. She
with her with her children. She had like three different

(13:19):
levels of table manners. One was like we're home, we're
having fun. Two was we're out to arrestaurant or whatever.
Three was we're dining with the queen, and so you
have to be super on your thing. I feel like
Danielle in your house. That's like the level of swearing
aloud is three. If it's a Mets game, you're allowed
to like swear however you want. Do your kids curse?
They think it's funny and they'll say like they'll say

(13:41):
moncusa shit and then they'll just say it, and then
they encourage it. But they asked for us. I just
I don't want. I don't want to bring them up
what they can't say bad words like I mean, they're
gonna say it. So I'm trying to raise them a
little bit like smart but street. So they want to
be whatever some say, go that way, you dad for that.

(14:04):
But they know that there's an F word. They know that,
like if they're not like growing up like in a
bubble like I just I want them to be like
my kids know as an effort. Also, they also know
they can't say it. They can't say it. Doesn't I
think that everybody's programmed to say, oh my god, my
kids can't say it. No scary direct question. What if dad,

(14:26):
Mommy's being an asshole? Okay, that's that's complete. That's ridiculous.
They're never gonna say that. Why why not? I don't
want I don't want you to raise kids because they
know that they're not gonna curse about mom and dad.
Like that starts a limit, like they have respect. You're
on the road and you pass the guy cut you
off in a road. I'm just trying to look at
that fucking asshole. I'm just right, like, well, the other
day a guy cut in front of me, and I'm like,

(14:48):
and Ella said, you could say to say what say
fuck that guy? That guy alright? Fifteen minute Morning show

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