The 15 Minute Morning Show - Pot - 4/24/17

We share some experiences of smoking or being around pot.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:02):
What would you talk about on your on your podcast phone,
Elvis represents, So what could possibly happen in the next
fifteen minutes? We have no clue. We don't even know
why we're here. Why are we here? Hi? Danielle, Danielle's here,
And there's Garrett, there's a Dave Rodie. Hello, there's a

(00:26):
scary how's it going? And there's a straight name in me,
your host, Elvis dur Red. I'm here to said Bethany,
Bethany whatever. You're just mad because I write down quotes
you say. So, you know, ever since Bethany started working here,
what three years ago? Was it three or four years ago?
How long? Four and a half four August two thousand twelve. Okay,

(00:49):
every time something is said in the room and she
feels like it could come back and help her out
in a court of law one day or whatever, she
writes it down. And so what did you write today?
She she always what do you call this file on
your phone? It's called conversations that I can't tweet. I
can't even say this because you're not gonna like it. Well,

(01:11):
maybe you shouldn't do it on the show. Can I
read me? I read it? The last one. Oh boy,
just like a diary or something like an ongoing journal,
I can say what this is? What did I say? Okay,
here's what I said? While high on cold medicine. He said, hello, lady,

(01:31):
have you ever ordered from maple? Why are you all
being so obnoxious? Why can't you all be quiet? Hello?
Then he kicked. Then he said we had to sit
a golden nugget yesterday, would wait for our helicopter to arrive,
and then he left. These are things he does. Are
you reading from the Elvis file? Things I say? But
you can't tweet. These are never on the air. Right,

(01:52):
It's okay, you said, I said, I wonder if the
restaurant Charlie Bird delivers to my house, and said, hello,
they don't deliver to bitches. You have the first one ever, um,
the very first one, and give a date. I don't
have a date. It doesn't date it. You call you
call me a horrible thing in here. I don't think

(02:13):
you want me to say it. Most of these cannot
be tweeted. Yeah, this one. So every day our producer
Ronnie comes in and brings you a stack of commercials.
You have to write such a foul mood and you
hate it. So this is when you looked at the
stack of commercials you had to read and you said, oh,
fuck me. And then Ronnie said, that's everything you didn't
do yesterday when you wanted me to fuck you. Then

(02:39):
that's the stuff I can read. I got a question,
is this some kind of catharsis? By writing it down,
you feel like it's a way of getting it out.
What's the point? I always write down conversations I think
are really funny. I always have. When I worked at
a bank, I kept an entire like notebook of conversations
that were funny. I always do it stuff behind the scenes. Yeah,

(03:00):
I always doing. Then you miss placed two million dollars.
I don't remember. I should text my friend Dave and
see if he remembers. So both Nate and I are
on code cold medicine today we're allergy medicine. Yeah. And
it's just it has us just it doesn't on another planet.
It doesn't feel like this is real. I know this
is I don't if I woke up, it would not

(03:21):
surprise me that this was all a dream. Like, it
doesn't feel like I did anything. Kind of hazy. Everything's
kind of hazy and it's presenting differently in both of you.
Like Elvis, You're you're punchy, You're like everything's funny, and
you're walking around a lot and you're talking really quickly
and you're kicking your legs. And then Nate, everything is
funny to you, like you got the giggles for a
good period of time. Remember one time Nate was out

(03:44):
of my house along with Dennis, our friend Dennis Lydia,
and the three of us we had stoned in the
swimming pool and it looked over Sorry you okay, Nate says,
I've never done this before. I've never done wet and
I'm like, oh my god, when you shouldn't be doing
it for the first time in my house, you could
have an murgic reaction and pool I thought, I've never

(04:04):
done this before, referred to the fact he was in
a pool naked with two other men. But he wasn't naked,
I wasn't my What was I wearing, I don't know,
but we have I was wearing my dazzle shorts. But yeah,
I remember that because I had never done it before,
I had this weird feeling and I remember staring into
a mirror for what seemed like five seconds, but I'm
pretty sure it was like thirty minutes. Here. I looked

(04:26):
at Dennis, said, where's Nate. He said, I don't know.
I thought you had him as I don't know. We
went up to we went upstairs to his bedroom and
he was in his bathroom staring in the mirror. Are
you okay? It was such a weird feeling. And then
you took me, like, let's get you something to eat.
So you got pie. I remember because we had stopped
at a roadside, this weird story roadside pie stand, and

(04:49):
we got pies, and you gave each an entire pie.
So we go out to the front porch and bear
in mind it's midnight, so it's pitch dark. And then
you said, let's walk around on the grass. Take your
shoes off. I have this really soft grass, and I did,
and it was weird. It was. It was very interesting

(05:11):
walking around with those shoes on in this grass, eating
pie out of the tin with my hands. Because I
think at that point I had lost We were stone,
We're out of our mind. Yeah, you guys should all
come over and we have so much fun at my house.
The grass is food food. It was the grass is soft.
It's very soft grass. It was very soft grass. What
were you seeing when you looked in the mirror? Do

(05:33):
you think for so long? That was not a bad experience.
I have had bad experience. Talk about that girl? Can
you talk about that girl you were with? Listen to
the story. It's very creepy. All right, I have to
say it now, Okay, okay. So I went out with
this girl. It was a bumbled eight. It went fine,
and then she said, hey, do you want to smoke

(05:55):
the stuff whatever you call it? Pot pot? I don't know.
I'm not a pot hit. I don't know. So we
go would you like to smoke out of my marijuana pipe?
I don't know what. So we go back to my
place and I'm like, yeah, you go for it. I'll
be fine. I'm fine. I don't need to do this. Coma. Yeah,
very funny. So we go to my bedroom and we're

(06:17):
smoking because I had the most airflow, and I'm like, fine,
I'll do one hit. And I do one hit and
the next thing I know, I'm laying on my back
because the room is spinning and I feel like I'm
sinking into the bed and like the walls are coming
in it was a bad reaction. And then I look
at this girl and she's speaking and her face starts

(06:41):
to turn into my grandmother's and she passed away three
and a half years ago. So I'm freaking out, thinking
my grandmother is standing there and thinking I've been on
a date all night with my dead grandmother. And then
I guess this is what paranoia is. She starts telling
me stuff and I don't believe her, and I think

(07:02):
she's going to steal all of my thing. So I'm
trying to figure out how to secure my belongings. But
I can't leave the bed because you're paralyzed. Because I'm paralyzed,
and I'm I'm physically I don't know if I did.
I know I didn't, but I felt like I was
sinking through the mattress and I couldn't move, and one

(07:22):
she's talking and smoking. Still I can't move, and so
it's like like you're smoking angel dust. Know I think
something was it. I don't know there was something in it,
so that regular pot shouldn't do that. So nothing ended
up happening with this girl, but you know that I
know of. But at one point I remember saying, you

(07:43):
need to go to bed with me now because I
couldn't move and I didn't. I didn't, I didn't sleep.
Doesn't sleep like you need to come sleep now? Because
I couldn't do anything else that sounds like salvia. That
does not sound like it was. I was allf you
should always I haven't done it. That's the two times
in the last thirty seven years I've done this. So

(08:03):
my smoking experience is more fun. I'd smoke with you
any day. That's a hell of a story to come
up with just because you couldn't get it up. No, no,
I tell that story. And by the way, I didn't
know that. I was just kidding. I told you stuff
you have? Yes, why you should? Okay, I'm being real. Sorry,

(08:24):
Oh my god, I've had Okay. No, no, no, no,
I'm not gonna say get it. Can we edit this?
But we're not gonna edit this. There's no editing on
the fifteen minute more. Can somebody else tell their weed story?
I'm uncomfortable right And he couldn't get it. No, I

(08:44):
didn't know. Did you notice the girl that he was
in bed with or trying to get in bed with Grandma?
When he started hallucinating, it looked like his grandmother. Probably
not a stretch from what you actually looked like it was. Alright,
we're telling we're drug stories. You've had a battery, somebody
else say something that a rectile dysfunction is common. There's

(09:07):
plenty of pills you can do. Yeah, it's nothing to
be ashamed. I've I don't I've smoked pot. I don't
like it. I don't like how No, I don't like
how I am on it. I'm I talk a lot
when I'm on it, like I get chatty, but nothing
I say is of any value whatsoever. And I I
just can't stop talking. It's terrible. Then we know not

(09:31):
to give it to not want me. It's just I
don't like how I feel. I just feel Garrett Garrett,
people think he's done all the time. Time. I've only
how you are. I've only had a pot via second hand.
So the first Yeah, So I was at a Coldplay
show at P and C Bank Art Center in Jersey
and we're out on the lawn because that's all the
tickets we could afford with, sit out on the lawn,
very cheap seats. So starry night. First time I'm really

(09:54):
smelling pot, Like in high school, the stars seem like
they were about to fall on me because as they
were so large, even though they were so far away.
But this the amount of pot that was going around,
I was like, whoa, and the total contact time contact
tied beyond belief. But that's the closest I've ever come.
Ever since then, I've always been accused. I've always been asked,

(10:16):
people think you're a pothead. I don't know. Maybe it's
it's it's because I'm very mellow. I don't show a
lot of emotion in the sense of like you know
that's bad for you, or you know I got some
for you, and I don't. I guess I dress apart.
I'm typecast and like a stoner. What do you think
he's If you didn't know Garrett Daniel, would you think
he's a stoner? Yeah? Here's the other thing. So my
shoes these are palm trees. But everyone that comes up

(10:38):
to me and goes, hey, why do you have weed
on your shoes? These are palm trees? But cool? I
love weed shoes, right, But so I guess I'm typecasted
as a pot it. Like Brody even never smoked pot,
I can tell have you smoked? Scary and el was
his apartment. Actually, tell that story. Tells story. You know,

(10:59):
I'm not saying it's gonna be legal in ten years.
Tell your story. He was when I first met him.
I was one of the first times I even tried pot.
Was in his apartment and it was just going around.
I'm like, I'll take some of that, and I was
high as fuck. Yeah, well I don't. I don't prefer it.
Though he has an exhaled still able to get in direction,

(11:19):
Like seriously, I like, you know, I will say this stuff.
I prefer the gummies because when I went to a
dispensary in Denver because they're totally legal, I loved. I
loved the feel of It's a different kind of high
you got. I don't like smoking it necessarily, but I
do like the gummies. What's the difference? Oh my god,
what you ingested? I don't know why you look at it.

(11:42):
I think that the expert do you you get it?
I think you do get a different high on with
edibles and you smoking. Anyway, What else you wanna talk about?
We have like three minutes left to talk about anything
except for drugs or erectile dysfunction. I need making get
it up now like, this is bullshit. Don't don't answer

(12:06):
his question. You're punishing the guy's name or not that well,
he turn his own name. We're good. You don't have
to worry about an direction lasting more than four hours.
If it does, If it does the grandma, he's with it,
not gonna be over to handle it. Take a take
a lip match, blow it out, press it, press it
against your penis? Are you stone year old virgin? When

(12:29):
he gets an direction and he can't get it in
the hotine? Okay? I thought you were just like, this
is the worst. Fifteen minute? Time is left? Too much?
Can we tap out early? No? It's fifteen minutes? Well
how much times left? Like two minutes? Don't you hate
when you can't finish something like a podcast? Or say,

(12:52):
I become the scary of this show. You're allowing to
rag on him all the time, and I'm a murderer.
I like old lay ease, we haven't murder. Wait a minute,
you would make you like old ladies. It's fine, there's
nothing wrong with that. But you make fun of me
all the time. I was making fun of you all
the time. A constipation I told me? Forgot about the

(13:15):
constillation thing? See. I used to do that to scary.
I become the scary of this. I was told they
always tease the ones they love, so they love you
the most. I was going to tell you to loosen up, Nate,
but you're finally getting stiff, so I don't want to
ruin it. Oh my god, the funny Brodie has a
file of a rectile dysfunction jokes in his phone, and
we just not talk about this anymore. I've been trying

(13:36):
to change something, but you keep bringing it back. Keep
bringing it back, seriously, keep bringing it up. You got
Sometimes you just gotta go with the blood flow. I
got three more. How much time do you have? You
have enough? Go? You see, you didn't have to make
a big deal out of it, and no one would know.
But now we know you have a problem. But he does.
I don't think he does. That's that's I think there's

(13:58):
something there because I hard on you. Wow, the E
D does not stand for Elvis Durant. There there is.
I don't think there's a problem, But all I'm saying
is that you're making it a problem. I may have
had an issue once everybody does. Now there's going to
be speculation I might as well clear the air about
you're the one who said it and an issue one

(14:19):
time with somebody I liked, and I told Elvis and
I thought he was talking about it when I wasn't
talking about that. That's my point. It was just a joke,
and now you turned it into something real. You you
did it. I didn't do it. I was clarifying because
now he's just gonna limp on out of here. There
it is. Are you done? Are you done? You have?

(14:41):
The music is about to start playing. Hold on, there is,
thank god, any party anyway going upstate this week into
like plasid, like plaid. I'm sorry. Fifteen minute Morning show
m