March 31, 2017 • 16 mins
Greg T has been calling a guy by the wrong name for over a month!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Oh, it's time for the fifteen minute morning show podcast
thanks to our friends at Harry's. Look, when it comes
to the beauty of shaving, you don't want to use
some razor that's gonna make you look like someone took
a lawnmower after you. Harry's they actually make their own
high quality blades in their own factory in Germany. It's
(00:21):
way too expensive to buy blades in the drug store
for your razor. Harry's makes shaving a very very personal
experience for you for two dollars of blade compared to
four dollars or more in the drug store. That's just
one of the billions of reasons you need to check
out Harry's. Go to Harry's dot com. They want you
to try their most popular trial set for free. It
comes with a razor handle of your choice, five blade cartridge,
(00:44):
and a shaving gel. It's totally free when you sign up,
just pay a small fee for shipping. Here's how you
do it. Go to Harry's dot com slash elvis. Do
it now before this fifteen minute morning show podcast is over.
Harry's dot com slash Elvis. What would you talk about
on your on your podcasts shows? Just a bunch of
(01:14):
yugs hanging out. I'll wait a second, that's the wrong podcast. Hey,
it's the fifteen minute Warning Show. The guys are here.
I'm scary. Is great team who vomitated into a Vonsai plant?
Just now? And Garrett, what did you do there? You're
right there? Yeah, I'm doing great. Man. You have something
on your chest? Well, yeah, I would like to tell
(01:36):
a story. You want to get it off. I'd been
begging to tell a story for about four days. Now,
why did you do it on the big show? I
have nowhere to tell this damn story. So finally I'm
at the bottom of the totem pole here to finally
be able to tell my story, because I mean, nobody
want story. I want to hear your story. But first,
what's a yug? Yu? I just it's guy backwards yu y.
(01:57):
I called you guys yugs. That's okay? Is that a
fair show thing? It's not this podcast, it's the I
don't know. I don't even know what day it is.
I don't even know a podcast we're hosting. But all
I know is the girl's freaking went home early and
they just left us in here alone. So that's Okay,
it does happen. But Gregg, he's got his coat on,
and he really thought he was gonna walk away and
escape the the week by with not telling his story
(02:19):
and getting this out on the here. So it almost
like is you're about to vomit on the podcast, so
tell your story. So vomit all over the podcast. Tell
your story, Greg T. And there's no time or on you.
So there's a really cool deli down the street from
our from where we work, and I've been going in
there quite often to the point that they know who
I am. They'll say, hey, Greg T, you know, good afternoon.
And I walk in there and I make some little
(02:40):
you know, some chit chat and whatever, and a little
by litterally get to know all the guys. So there's
Jordan's and there's Moan, and there's Freddie and those guys
are the standard employees of the deli, and they speak
the language of Arabic. So sometimes they're speaking in Arabic,
but I don't understand, and I am always crossing my
fingers that they're never talking about me, but I'm sure
that they because they're always laughing when I walk in there.
(03:02):
So anyway, now does do you walk in, they start
talking in another language and then they start laughing or
they already left, right exactly. I walk in, they start
talking in Arabic and then they start laughing. I do
think you're talking about me? Okay, so chalk that up
for lesson learned. Uh that. So and so I'm talking
to Jordan one day and Jordan's says, greg T, I
want to introduce you to my cousin who's gonna be
(03:24):
staying here for the next year with us, right, And
he says, here's my cousin. And my cousin's name is Zobby.
And I say, okay, great, I go hello, Zubby and
everybody starts laughing. So every single day goes by and
go get a sandwich, and then I see the people
and I'll say hello to Freddie, and then there's a
be yo, Zubby, what's up? Right? And I keep on
yelling Zubby. So about a month goes by and happy
(03:45):
to be Yesterday morning, Danielle needed something to eat real fast,
so she said tea, since you're going outside, could you
grab this for me. I'll pay you when you come
back up, it said journal problem. So I went down
to the Delhi and I said, hey, I need you
know this for a sandwich that a friend of mine needs,
no problem, Greg t, And they made it. So I
went to the cash register to pay, even to leave
and come back up here. When he got to the
(04:06):
cash register, who was in front of the cash register?
But it was Zabby, so Zabi says. He goes, Greg T,
why do you call me Zab? And I said, because
your name is Zab? And he says, no, my name
is yah Zine, And I said, what do you mean?
So for the past month, I've been calling this guy Zab,
(04:28):
which is I thought his name in Arabic? Right. Turns
out Jordan, his cousin, told me that his name was Zaby,
and and he's just been going going along with it,
never correcting me, when really his name is yah Zine.
Do you know what zaby means in Arabic? It means dick.
(04:50):
So I have been calling him dick for a month, right,
And then they sent you up. They framed you. Every
time I walk in there, I see the guys, Hey, Jordan,
what's up, Freddie, what's going on? Like yo? Zabby? And
he and he turns. They all laugh and he just
smirks and waves his hand. Now did they now did?
I wonder if they told him that They did? They
(05:12):
told you and they set him up like that. Well,
I don't know what happened, but eventually so he finally
it was just the two of us at the cash register.
It was like the perfect storm. I was there. He
was excuse, he's behind the counter cutting meats and stuff.
So that's why they that's why they even laughing all
this time because that time and he they all knew
that the word is zab in Arabic means dick. You're
(05:33):
lucky didn't punch you right, Well, I know, but I
had no idea. What do I know? So? And do
you know what the funny thing is? Though? After I
left and I was so embarrassed, I'm sitting there gonna
know what, There's always that time where I would yell
Zabbi and the other three guys would laugh their asses off,
and he would just smirk and go and go like
this and like he kind of wave, never really laugh
(05:55):
until finally, Now I know, because he was tired of
me calling him dick for he was tampering with your
sandwiches after you called him every time. I want to know,
was he adding all kinds of things are making your
doing something within or putting meat on the sign that
putting on my my sandwich when I came and I
come in, so I'm I'm I'm a creature of habit.
I'm I go in there very like almost every day.
(06:16):
At the same time, I've been calling him a dick
for like a month over an let's turn the tables.
Let's say, um, you work there and some customer came
in every day and called you dick? Right, what would
you do? How would you get back at him? Would
you spit in his coffee? Would you punch him? Would
you funk with his food? You know, I don't know.
I don't think. I'm too scared to mess with people's foods.
I don't know how that because you listen, I have allergies,
(06:37):
so I can't, in my mom thinker to spit. You
don't know what people are allergic to. You. I never
want to give something something to somebody that they digest.
I would never do that and run that risk, even
if they called you a dick. Every day. I think
on my grab like here, don't me even tell you something?
But no, I wouldn't do it. I wouldn't I gotta
say that that was a great story. Why didn't you
tell that on the Big Show? Well, I've been trying
to tell the story in the Big but the Elvis day,
(07:00):
didn't you know, he wasn't perceptive to the story, and
then receptive to the story. And then today when Brody
pitched the idea to him, he kind of said, you know, well,
Greg goes into this Delhi where this. Don't blame the
pitching you did. He used the word, and as soon
as Elvis heard the pitch, he didn't want to go
(07:20):
to it. Don't blame the pitch. That's what blamed the catcher.
It would have been funny. It would have been a funny, funny,
funny story here. Yeah, but it's on there, told him.
But the bottom of the I think of enough people
hearing this podcast on Monday morning, text in and say, Elvis,
please ask Greg T to tell the Deli story. I
think it'll get on the So do Greg to your
(07:40):
favor on Monday morning, not at six o'clock, seven coast time,
seven coast time, text, I really want to hear Greg
T's Deli story. He told it on. Don't mention that,
just say you want to get a deli story. There
were rules. Scared start off, Yeah, I wanted to go
on here the deli store. By the way, I do
(08:04):
this to Scary every semester, Yes, he does every semester.
Scary is terrible with intern names. We have fourteen interns.
Every semester. You are doing this to me, Yeah, what
what's that girl's name with the glasses on the phones? Whatever?
And I'll say, Angela, come on, man, what's her name?
Dude's Angela? Alright, I'm I did that last semester. I'm
gonna lie to you this semester. He'll go and go, hey,
Angela's going and of course you go, my name Stephanie
(08:26):
and he looks. You know, he faltered every semester because
it's terrible because I'm really trying to honestly learn the
interns names. There's like seventeen of them, right, But now
I do it. Even after you've learned their names, you'll
still ask me, like three weeks later, hey man, what's
that girl's name on the phones? So I feel like
if you don't remember their name after three weeks, then
I lie to you and you go, oh, that's right,
or I'll tell you intern Be's name as intern A.
So the name sounds familiar, but not to the right person.
(08:50):
I know there's an intern Melissa, so I'm gonna that
must be you. Yeah, you did that. You set me
up on purpose. But what about when you talk about
people behind their backs like that in another lane or
in front of them in another language. When you get
your nails done, you have got My wife goes from manicure,
she knows that they're talking about her. Yeah, well, it
happens in my elevator. Um, you know, if I walk
into the elevator, two women of Asian descent are in there,
(09:12):
and I'm in the elevator with them, and They're looking
at each other, back and forth, and they just go
into into a different language. I'm sure it happens, and
I get a complex over it. I'm like, are they
talking about? Are they talking behind my back? The dice
chances are that you don't understand what they're talking about,
and they probably are. What if I spoke fluent Mandarin,
then the joke would be on them, correct and then
you would say something. They would be like, oh my god,
(09:33):
the odds they look at you. There's no way you
come close to speaking man now, they're judging by the
way I look. You're right, we're but still don't look
the way you look. You don't look Asian. And most
schools don't teach Mandarin. And when seventh grade, odds all
you learned Spanish, French, retalent. If I took five different
languages in college, if you look at right, now, look
(09:55):
at the odds here in the room. There's four of us. Right,
let's say one of us did that's a that's chance
that that's somebody here. What languages do you guys speak
outside of English? None? I understand a little Spanish, little Spanish,
little Spanish, Polish, he says, yamash he didn't speak. I
can speak a bunch of together. I understand everything that
they say. I just can't put all together in sentences.
(10:15):
I was a kid that was raised American here instead
of being raised Polish. It happens. My my uncle is
very upset my that my parents never really uh you know,
raised me. But they get very Polish on holidays, right, Yes,
we do. See, that's the thing. We still celebrate our
traditions from the past. Like I get very Italian all
of a sudden on Easter that's coming up. Soon. I'm
also Jewish and we celebrate past want not What do
you mean okay technically your okay? Your mother married a
(10:39):
second marriage a Jewish guy. It doesn't change your genetics.
It doesn't change Wait, I've known you for twenty two years. Yes,
you Jewish on the holidays when he wants to started
dating him when we when I was fifteen, and then
they got married when I was eighteen, and you and
your daughter is gonna be bought Mitford. Well no, but
(11:00):
but we so I have Jewish names. But we wait
a second team, so no, stupid? It was raised wasn't?
I was raised Catholic? But since I've been fifteen, we
have been celebrating all of the Jewish holidays. So that
makes me half Jewish? No? No, wait a second mom,
sovers bigger than I celebrate bus Steele Day. Doesn't make
(11:23):
me French. I have a yamaka that's been blessed in Israel.
Body great, No, that doesn't count football. I don't play
in the NFL. Is your mother? What is she? My
mom is Catholic? Is she German? What she buy? She's
a German Catholic? German Catholic that screams jew and what
about your dad? He was he was a pollock, he
(11:46):
was Polish Catholic. You have not you have not a
trade of Jewan. Yes, but I don't speak to my
biological and my end stand really is my dad. But yeah,
but you still haven't gone through. What's the first letter
in the Hebrew alphabet high? Wrong? That's the eighteen I
was closed. Did you know? That's why eighteen is considered
(12:08):
good luck and why you write checks to Jewish occasions.
I was just going to say that divisions of eighteen
divisions of eighteen. No talk to me about this. So
the letter high it also means um life life. That
doesn't say right there like life to life hum exactly?
So um high is uh considered good luck? It's the
eighteen letter letter. Right. But he doesn't know that he's
(12:31):
not Jewish. I'm trying to say. He keeps cutting me off.
I want to say what, and he keeps saying the
same thing. I'm Greg eats locks every morning after the
last four days. That does not lock. That does not
make him Jewish. Oh my god, I'll go to any
Jewish Delhi. I love him. I ko shirts great like
I'm I can't BELI I'm learning something knew about Okay,
all these years, I really thought you were Jewish Jewish.
(12:52):
I'm half jewsh not half Jewish. Your step Jewish, but
you're not. At this point in life, I don't even
have a say hold on, hold on, I'm gonna say
this as a jew, right, yes, Okay. How many times
have you gone to one store because it was closer,
even though they charged more money because you didn't want
to drive five miles to save twenty bucks on a TV,
(13:14):
never just going to the first store. I can that
proved not. I'm sorry. I had a fight with him
last year. He's buying a television set and I said,
you gotta go to this particular store, right, I used
to go to PC Richard and Sons always better. He's like,
it's too fun to dry, I'm going to blah blah blah.
(13:34):
I I also said, Brody, I'm gonna put you in
in in uh in contact with a good friend of mine.
He's gonna give you a low price. Do not ask
him for another discount. And you know what Brody did.
What he did he asked it for another discount, proving
my point. Right, that's terribly that he does that. Enough,
No emails. No. No. The bottom line is, if you
believe that you're half Jewish, then you could be half Jewish.
(13:56):
So I believe that I'm Jewish, so I am him.
I was Catholic, and I'm not trying to claim otherwise.
I'm also half Italian as well. You're out of halves? No, no, no,
how many halves do you have? How you? First of
all hold on because my actions are much more like
an Italian person. I don't think I'm Italian. Time having
a problem here. What Italian is a nationality, that's Jewish
is a religion, doesn't not half Italian. It doesn't mean
(14:19):
anything anymore. If you are who you are, then you
are what you are, right, I am I'm You're not
comparing apples to apples. When I say I'm Jewish, people go,
I'm Italian Italian, But you're half Catholic, half Jewish. But
I have Judaism in my life, and I could be
half Jewish if I had no no, no, no no.
My wife is Italian. Time. If you watch a murder mystery,
(14:41):
you're not a murderer. But I talk Italian like that? No,
I have not, but I've been to many You could
be an Italian Jew. I am I'm Italian Jew. Christmas.
That's it. That's internationality went to religion. There are Jews
in every country. I don't believe that you have to
be that nationality in order to be that nationality. If
(15:02):
you believe not a nationality, but if you believe that
your Italian. That's what nationality means. You can't say I'm
Italian because you act Italian. I do act Italian. Polish
now I'm now Polish. If he wants to start acting
to be Polish, I believe I'm Polish. Right, Garrett, your congratulation,
then thank you very much. You know who you are
on the inside of your body. You know nationality your passport.
(15:25):
You can't writing your passport. I feel like I'm Italian, unfortunately,
is right. Unfortunately I have to actually and t s
A stops you. Okay, your passport says you feel like
you How are you Italian? And Garrett is correct? Comes
time to dinner choices, you could be. I feel i'd
feel in Italian tonight to an Italian restaurant. Listen, Garrett
were talking about it earlier. It's two thousand seventeen. I
(15:45):
could be anything I want to be, except smart, I
am brilliant, You'll be brilliant as brilliant, coming to a
fifteen minute morning show,
Oh, it's time for the fifteen minute morning show podcast
thanks to our friends at Harry's. Look, when it comes
to the beauty of shaving, you don't want to use
some razor that's gonna make you look like someone took
a lawnmower after you. Harry's they actually make their own
high quality blades in their own factory in Germany. It's
(00:21):
way too expensive to buy blades in the drug store
for your razor. Harry's makes shaving a very very personal
experience for you for two dollars of blade compared to
four dollars or more in the drug store. That's just
one of the billions of reasons you need to check
out Harry's. Go to Harry's dot com. They want you
to try their most popular trial set for free. It
comes with a razor handle of your choice, five blade cartridge,
(00:44):
and a shaving gel. It's totally free when you sign up,
just pay a small fee for shipping. Here's how you
do it. Go to Harry's dot com slash elvis. Do
it now before this fifteen minute morning show podcast is over.
Harry's dot com slash Elvis. What would you talk about
on your on your podcasts shows? Just a bunch of
(01:14):
yugs hanging out. I'll wait a second, that's the wrong podcast. Hey,
it's the fifteen minute Warning Show. The guys are here.
I'm scary. Is great team who vomitated into a Vonsai plant?
Just now? And Garrett, what did you do there? You're
right there? Yeah, I'm doing great. Man. You have something
on your chest? Well, yeah, I would like to tell
(01:36):
a story. You want to get it off. I'd been
begging to tell a story for about four days. Now,
why did you do it on the big show? I
have nowhere to tell this damn story. So finally I'm
at the bottom of the totem pole here to finally
be able to tell my story, because I mean, nobody
want story. I want to hear your story. But first,
what's a yug? Yu? I just it's guy backwards yu y.
(01:57):
I called you guys yugs. That's okay? Is that a
fair show thing? It's not this podcast, it's the I
don't know. I don't even know what day it is.
I don't even know a podcast we're hosting. But all
I know is the girl's freaking went home early and
they just left us in here alone. So that's Okay,
it does happen. But Gregg, he's got his coat on,
and he really thought he was gonna walk away and
escape the the week by with not telling his story
(02:19):
and getting this out on the here. So it almost
like is you're about to vomit on the podcast, so
tell your story. So vomit all over the podcast. Tell
your story, Greg T. And there's no time or on you.
So there's a really cool deli down the street from
our from where we work, and I've been going in
there quite often to the point that they know who
I am. They'll say, hey, Greg T, you know, good afternoon.
And I walk in there and I make some little
(02:40):
you know, some chit chat and whatever, and a little
by litterally get to know all the guys. So there's
Jordan's and there's Moan, and there's Freddie and those guys
are the standard employees of the deli, and they speak
the language of Arabic. So sometimes they're speaking in Arabic,
but I don't understand, and I am always crossing my
fingers that they're never talking about me, but I'm sure
that they because they're always laughing when I walk in there.
(03:02):
So anyway, now does do you walk in, they start
talking in another language and then they start laughing or
they already left, right exactly. I walk in, they start
talking in Arabic and then they start laughing. I do
think you're talking about me? Okay, so chalk that up
for lesson learned. Uh that. So and so I'm talking
to Jordan one day and Jordan's says, greg T, I
want to introduce you to my cousin who's gonna be
(03:24):
staying here for the next year with us, right, And
he says, here's my cousin. And my cousin's name is Zobby.
And I say, okay, great, I go hello, Zubby and
everybody starts laughing. So every single day goes by and
go get a sandwich, and then I see the people
and I'll say hello to Freddie, and then there's a
be yo, Zubby, what's up? Right? And I keep on
yelling Zubby. So about a month goes by and happy
(03:45):
to be Yesterday morning, Danielle needed something to eat real fast,
so she said tea, since you're going outside, could you
grab this for me. I'll pay you when you come
back up, it said journal problem. So I went down
to the Delhi and I said, hey, I need you
know this for a sandwich that a friend of mine needs,
no problem, Greg t, And they made it. So I
went to the cash register to pay, even to leave
and come back up here. When he got to the
(04:06):
cash register, who was in front of the cash register?
But it was Zabby, so Zabi says. He goes, Greg T,
why do you call me Zab? And I said, because
your name is Zab? And he says, no, my name
is yah Zine, And I said, what do you mean?
So for the past month, I've been calling this guy Zab,
(04:28):
which is I thought his name in Arabic? Right. Turns
out Jordan, his cousin, told me that his name was Zaby,
and and he's just been going going along with it,
never correcting me, when really his name is yah Zine.
Do you know what zaby means in Arabic? It means dick.
(04:50):
So I have been calling him dick for a month, right,
And then they sent you up. They framed you. Every
time I walk in there, I see the guys, Hey, Jordan,
what's up, Freddie, what's going on? Like yo? Zabby? And
he and he turns. They all laugh and he just
smirks and waves his hand. Now did they now did?
I wonder if they told him that They did? They
(05:12):
told you and they set him up like that. Well,
I don't know what happened, but eventually so he finally
it was just the two of us at the cash register.
It was like the perfect storm. I was there. He
was excuse, he's behind the counter cutting meats and stuff.
So that's why they that's why they even laughing all
this time because that time and he they all knew
that the word is zab in Arabic means dick. You're
(05:33):
lucky didn't punch you right, Well, I know, but I
had no idea. What do I know? So? And do
you know what the funny thing is? Though? After I
left and I was so embarrassed, I'm sitting there gonna
know what, There's always that time where I would yell
Zabbi and the other three guys would laugh their asses off,
and he would just smirk and go and go like
this and like he kind of wave, never really laugh
(05:55):
until finally, Now I know, because he was tired of
me calling him dick for he was tampering with your
sandwiches after you called him every time. I want to know,
was he adding all kinds of things are making your
doing something within or putting meat on the sign that
putting on my my sandwich when I came and I
come in, so I'm I'm I'm a creature of habit.
I'm I go in there very like almost every day.
(06:16):
At the same time, I've been calling him a dick
for like a month over an let's turn the tables.
Let's say, um, you work there and some customer came
in every day and called you dick? Right, what would
you do? How would you get back at him? Would
you spit in his coffee? Would you punch him? Would
you funk with his food? You know, I don't know.
I don't think. I'm too scared to mess with people's foods.
I don't know how that because you listen, I have allergies,
(06:37):
so I can't, in my mom thinker to spit. You
don't know what people are allergic to. You. I never
want to give something something to somebody that they digest.
I would never do that and run that risk, even
if they called you a dick. Every day. I think
on my grab like here, don't me even tell you something?
But no, I wouldn't do it. I wouldn't I gotta
say that that was a great story. Why didn't you
tell that on the Big Show? Well, I've been trying
to tell the story in the Big but the Elvis day,
(07:00):
didn't you know, he wasn't perceptive to the story, and
then receptive to the story. And then today when Brody
pitched the idea to him, he kind of said, you know, well,
Greg goes into this Delhi where this. Don't blame the
pitching you did. He used the word, and as soon
as Elvis heard the pitch, he didn't want to go
(07:20):
to it. Don't blame the pitch. That's what blamed the catcher.
It would have been funny. It would have been a funny, funny,
funny story here. Yeah, but it's on there, told him.
But the bottom of the I think of enough people
hearing this podcast on Monday morning, text in and say, Elvis,
please ask Greg T to tell the Deli story. I
think it'll get on the So do Greg to your
(07:40):
favor on Monday morning, not at six o'clock, seven coast time,
seven coast time, text, I really want to hear Greg
T's Deli story. He told it on. Don't mention that,
just say you want to get a deli story. There
were rules. Scared start off, Yeah, I wanted to go
on here the deli store. By the way, I do
(08:04):
this to Scary every semester, Yes, he does every semester.
Scary is terrible with intern names. We have fourteen interns.
Every semester. You are doing this to me, Yeah, what
what's that girl's name with the glasses on the phones? Whatever?
And I'll say, Angela, come on, man, what's her name?
Dude's Angela? Alright, I'm I did that last semester. I'm
gonna lie to you this semester. He'll go and go, hey,
Angela's going and of course you go, my name Stephanie
(08:26):
and he looks. You know, he faltered every semester because
it's terrible because I'm really trying to honestly learn the
interns names. There's like seventeen of them, right, But now
I do it. Even after you've learned their names, you'll
still ask me, like three weeks later, hey man, what's
that girl's name on the phones? So I feel like
if you don't remember their name after three weeks, then
I lie to you and you go, oh, that's right,
or I'll tell you intern Be's name as intern A.
So the name sounds familiar, but not to the right person.
(08:50):
I know there's an intern Melissa, so I'm gonna that
must be you. Yeah, you did that. You set me
up on purpose. But what about when you talk about
people behind their backs like that in another lane or
in front of them in another language. When you get
your nails done, you have got My wife goes from manicure,
she knows that they're talking about her. Yeah, well, it
happens in my elevator. Um, you know, if I walk
into the elevator, two women of Asian descent are in there,
(09:12):
and I'm in the elevator with them, and They're looking
at each other, back and forth, and they just go
into into a different language. I'm sure it happens, and
I get a complex over it. I'm like, are they
talking about? Are they talking behind my back? The dice
chances are that you don't understand what they're talking about,
and they probably are. What if I spoke fluent Mandarin,
then the joke would be on them, correct and then
you would say something. They would be like, oh my god,
(09:33):
the odds they look at you. There's no way you
come close to speaking man now, they're judging by the
way I look. You're right, we're but still don't look
the way you look. You don't look Asian. And most
schools don't teach Mandarin. And when seventh grade, odds all
you learned Spanish, French, retalent. If I took five different
languages in college, if you look at right, now, look
(09:55):
at the odds here in the room. There's four of us. Right,
let's say one of us did that's a that's chance
that that's somebody here. What languages do you guys speak
outside of English? None? I understand a little Spanish, little Spanish,
little Spanish, Polish, he says, yamash he didn't speak. I
can speak a bunch of together. I understand everything that
they say. I just can't put all together in sentences.
(10:15):
I was a kid that was raised American here instead
of being raised Polish. It happens. My my uncle is
very upset my that my parents never really uh you know,
raised me. But they get very Polish on holidays, right, Yes,
we do. See, that's the thing. We still celebrate our
traditions from the past. Like I get very Italian all
of a sudden on Easter that's coming up. Soon. I'm
also Jewish and we celebrate past want not What do
you mean okay technically your okay? Your mother married a
(10:39):
second marriage a Jewish guy. It doesn't change your genetics.
It doesn't change Wait, I've known you for twenty two years. Yes,
you Jewish on the holidays when he wants to started
dating him when we when I was fifteen, and then
they got married when I was eighteen, and you and
your daughter is gonna be bought Mitford. Well no, but
(11:00):
but we so I have Jewish names. But we wait
a second team, so no, stupid? It was raised wasn't?
I was raised Catholic? But since I've been fifteen, we
have been celebrating all of the Jewish holidays. So that
makes me half Jewish? No? No, wait a second mom,
sovers bigger than I celebrate bus Steele Day. Doesn't make
(11:23):
me French. I have a yamaka that's been blessed in Israel.
Body great, No, that doesn't count football. I don't play
in the NFL. Is your mother? What is she? My
mom is Catholic? Is she German? What she buy? She's
a German Catholic? German Catholic that screams jew and what
about your dad? He was he was a pollock, he
(11:46):
was Polish Catholic. You have not you have not a
trade of Jewan. Yes, but I don't speak to my
biological and my end stand really is my dad. But yeah,
but you still haven't gone through. What's the first letter
in the Hebrew alphabet high? Wrong? That's the eighteen I
was closed. Did you know? That's why eighteen is considered
(12:08):
good luck and why you write checks to Jewish occasions.
I was just going to say that divisions of eighteen
divisions of eighteen. No talk to me about this. So
the letter high it also means um life life. That
doesn't say right there like life to life hum exactly?
So um high is uh considered good luck? It's the
eighteen letter letter. Right. But he doesn't know that he's
(12:31):
not Jewish. I'm trying to say. He keeps cutting me off.
I want to say what, and he keeps saying the
same thing. I'm Greg eats locks every morning after the
last four days. That does not lock. That does not
make him Jewish. Oh my god, I'll go to any
Jewish Delhi. I love him. I ko shirts great like
I'm I can't BELI I'm learning something knew about Okay,
all these years, I really thought you were Jewish Jewish.
(12:52):
I'm half jewsh not half Jewish. Your step Jewish, but
you're not. At this point in life, I don't even
have a say hold on, hold on, I'm gonna say
this as a jew, right, yes, Okay. How many times
have you gone to one store because it was closer,
even though they charged more money because you didn't want
to drive five miles to save twenty bucks on a TV,
(13:14):
never just going to the first store. I can that
proved not. I'm sorry. I had a fight with him
last year. He's buying a television set and I said,
you gotta go to this particular store, right, I used
to go to PC Richard and Sons always better. He's like,
it's too fun to dry, I'm going to blah blah blah.
(13:34):
I I also said, Brody, I'm gonna put you in
in in uh in contact with a good friend of mine.
He's gonna give you a low price. Do not ask
him for another discount. And you know what Brody did.
What he did he asked it for another discount, proving
my point. Right, that's terribly that he does that. Enough,
No emails. No. No. The bottom line is, if you
believe that you're half Jewish, then you could be half Jewish.
(13:56):
So I believe that I'm Jewish, so I am him.
I was Catholic, and I'm not trying to claim otherwise.
I'm also half Italian as well. You're out of halves? No, no, no,
how many halves do you have? How you? First of
all hold on because my actions are much more like
an Italian person. I don't think I'm Italian. Time having
a problem here. What Italian is a nationality, that's Jewish
is a religion, doesn't not half Italian. It doesn't mean
(14:19):
anything anymore. If you are who you are, then you
are what you are, right, I am I'm You're not
comparing apples to apples. When I say I'm Jewish, people go,
I'm Italian Italian, But you're half Catholic, half Jewish. But
I have Judaism in my life, and I could be
half Jewish if I had no no, no, no no.
My wife is Italian. Time. If you watch a murder mystery,
(14:41):
you're not a murderer. But I talk Italian like that? No,
I have not, but I've been to many You could
be an Italian Jew. I am I'm Italian Jew. Christmas.
That's it. That's internationality went to religion. There are Jews
in every country. I don't believe that you have to
be that nationality in order to be that nationality. If
(15:02):
you believe not a nationality, but if you believe that
your Italian. That's what nationality means. You can't say I'm
Italian because you act Italian. I do act Italian. Polish
now I'm now Polish. If he wants to start acting
to be Polish, I believe I'm Polish. Right, Garrett, your congratulation,
then thank you very much. You know who you are
on the inside of your body. You know nationality your passport.
(15:25):
You can't writing your passport. I feel like I'm Italian, unfortunately,
is right. Unfortunately I have to actually and t s
A stops you. Okay, your passport says you feel like
you How are you Italian? And Garrett is correct? Comes
time to dinner choices, you could be. I feel i'd
feel in Italian tonight to an Italian restaurant. Listen, Garrett
were talking about it earlier. It's two thousand seventeen. I
(15:45):
could be anything I want to be, except smart, I
am brilliant, You'll be brilliant as brilliant, coming to a
fifteen minute morning show,
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