Because of Lice, We're Burning Your Stuff

Rachel is a germaphobe who now thinks she has lice, thanks to her officemate! 

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Don't answer the phone.

Speaker 2 (00:01):
Elvis Duran, the Elvis.

Speaker 1 (00:03):
Duran phone tap. Let's roll into a brand new phone tap.
This one's from Garrett.

Speaker 3 (00:06):
All right, So Sally wants to play a phone tap
on her coworker Rachel. Now, Rachel is a germophobe slash
hypochondriac and got worked up the other day thinking she
was sick, so she took the day off. So Sally
and her co worker said, you know what, let's play
a phone tap on her. So I'm going to call
from HR saying I know why you're sick, and then
her friends are going to join it.

Speaker 4 (00:27):
Don't we all have a friend like that. Yes, yeah,
if there's a new disease, they have it. All right,
let's listen to Garretts phone tap. Hi Rachel, this is
Chris over with Z. I work in the HR department.

Speaker 2 (00:40):
Oh Hi, how are you.

Speaker 1 (00:41):
I'm fantastic, Thank you. How are you feeling today?

Speaker 2 (00:45):
I'm home sick, I call my boss. Everything's cool.

Speaker 3 (00:47):
I just needed to kick the day. I'm calling just
to make you aware of a situation that happened at
the office. What happened there seems to be a lie
out break over the past.

Speaker 1 (00:59):
We can have Oh my god.

Speaker 3 (01:02):
You might not have it, but if you come in
contact with a salium, you you will.

Speaker 1 (01:07):
Are you familiar with with grit?

Speaker 2 (01:09):
Yes? I drive to work with her every morning, and
her cubicles right next to mine.

Speaker 1 (01:12):
Oh my, I'm so so disgusting.

Speaker 2 (01:15):
Oh how could she have come to work.

Speaker 1 (01:17):
She wasn't aware of a situation for a good two
to three.

Speaker 2 (01:20):
Weeks, like, oh my, oh my god, I just I
just feel like it's she all over right now. I
feel disgusting.

Speaker 3 (01:24):
So, Rachel, we're just going to go ahead and take
care of some things here at the office. We have
Jose at your desk right now.

Speaker 2 (01:30):
Okay, well, what's he doing in my No, what's he
doing in my desk?

Speaker 1 (01:33):
Nothing serious.

Speaker 3 (01:33):
We're just going to take a few things out back
that we feel that are high risk and burn them.

Speaker 2 (01:39):
No, no, I'm sorry. That is my personal stuff. You
cannot go in there. That's like a violation of my privacy,
property whatever.

Speaker 3 (01:45):
Okay, well, there's a good chance that it too is
infected with life, like your seat, like your computer, like
your pictures.

Speaker 1 (01:51):
We are sorry, but we will have to get rid
of some of that stuff.

Speaker 2 (01:54):
And yes, this is that's my stuff. This is not
my fault. Somebody else is going around infecting all of
us and you're I'm sorry, that is not okay.

Speaker 1 (02:02):
We will be in contact with you. Let you know
when it's safe to come back to the office.

Speaker 2 (02:06):
You can't throw out my stuff. Don't throw out my stuff.

Speaker 3 (02:08):
Okay, just seek doctor attention and we'll be in contact
over the next few days. All right, have a nice day.
She really is a germanis folks.

Speaker 4 (02:15):
I'm gonna be freaking out all.

Speaker 1 (02:17):
Day, so I want you to do this.

Speaker 3 (02:19):
We're gonna call her back and act like you are
out to lunch and you're just checking in on your
sick friend and see how her day's going.

Speaker 2 (02:25):
All right, okay, all right, Hello, Hey, how you doing?
Oh my god, how am I doing? How are you doing?

Speaker 1 (02:36):
Great?

Speaker 4 (02:36):
I'm at lunch, it's I'm eating outside.

Speaker 1 (02:38):
It's beautiful.

Speaker 2 (02:39):
What's the Sally I need to call from h RCS
that you gave me life?

Speaker 1 (02:44):
No way, you're joking.

Speaker 2 (02:46):
I'm not joking. I have to wake up she like
not feeling well today, like something is wrong. And then
I just find out the office is in fact that
they're throwing all that out and it's because of you.
She said, you're the one that had it first of all.

Speaker 1 (02:57):
They're not throwing everything away, just something.

Speaker 2 (03:00):
And are you kidding me? You get in my car
and let all your bugs spread onto me and you
don't mention it. How can you do that? You're messing
with people?

Speaker 1 (03:07):
Tell you like.

Speaker 2 (03:10):
Me, man, I'm not messing with your health.

Speaker 4 (03:12):
It's not even your health.

Speaker 3 (03:13):
It's just your hair.

Speaker 2 (03:14):
It's not like it's bugs on my body infecting me.
And they did say that, like, if you have had
it for a couple of days, then you can't get
rid of it.

Speaker 1 (03:22):
The best thing to do is to shave your head.

Speaker 2 (03:24):
What are you kidding? No, no, no, no, no, no
no no.

Speaker 4 (03:28):
How's that a good deal?

Speaker 3 (03:29):
I mean, hey, Rachel, Hello, my name's Garret and Elvis
Durant and the Morning Show. You got phone tapped by
your best friend and Sally, Oh.

Speaker 1 (03:38):
My god, what you don't have lice?

Speaker 2 (03:41):
I hate you Elvis Durant's phone