August 8, 2025 • 5 mins
Mr. Michael Oppenheimer has a hot new product to sell, the Swivel Sweeper!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
The Elvis Durand's Phone.
Speaker 2 (00:01):
Tap, The Return of Michael Oppenheimer. Oh, my mother hates
telemarketing phone calls. My mom's your typical Italian lady who
goes nuts when she's annoyed by anything. Therefore, wouldn't it
be hilarious if she got a call from mister Michael
Oppenheimer played by her own Scary Jones.
Speaker 1 (00:20):
Well, Kristin, thank you, Kristin.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
We are now going to phone tap your mom Scary
Jones as mister Michael Oppenheimer, it's going to call your
mom at home, as Kristin listens in in the background.
Let's listen into today's phone tap.
Speaker 3 (00:32):
Hello.
Speaker 1 (00:33):
Oh, yes, this is mister Michael Lomenheimer. But swivel sweeper
the best, most convenient cordless sweper. Ever, how are you
doing today.
Speaker 3 (00:39):
Mint, I'm doing fine.
Speaker 1 (00:41):
Oh we'd like to send you one of our cordless
swivel sweepers.
Speaker 3 (00:44):
I'm really not interested, but I thank you very much.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
The swivel sweeper is for use in the kitchen, the
family room, the dining room, the bathroom.
Speaker 3 (00:52):
I'm really not interested, thank you.
Speaker 1 (00:54):
It swivels three hundred and sixty degrees for easy movement.
Around furniture interested. Hello, Hello, Oh, yes, this is.
Speaker 3 (01:05):
Well. Please don't call back again. I do not want
a swivel sweeper. Thank you.
Speaker 1 (01:09):
Even the cleanest of houses can use a visit from
the cordless swivel sweeper.
Speaker 3 (01:14):
I don't want the sleeper. Please do not call here again.
Speaker 4 (01:17):
I'm not going to answer the phone.
Speaker 1 (01:23):
Hello, Yes, good afternoon. This is mister Michael.
Speaker 4 (01:26):
I told you I don't want it.
Speaker 3 (01:28):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (01:28):
What if I took ten dollars off the set?
Speaker 4 (01:30):
If it took nothing, okay, I don't want the sweeper.
Do not call again. What if I do not call again?
Speaker 3 (01:36):
Thank you?
Speaker 1 (01:37):
Complimentary shipping and handling. Hello, Hello, Hi the quote.
Speaker 4 (01:43):
Ye, look, my husband's a crap.
Speaker 1 (01:46):
Okay, I understand.
Speaker 3 (01:47):
I don't want to be bothered. I said, I don't
want the swivel sweeper.
Speaker 4 (01:51):
Leave me alone.
Speaker 1 (01:52):
You do understand that the cordless swivel sweeper as you.
Speaker 4 (01:54):
Yes, Look, I'm going to say this is the last time.
Speaker 3 (01:57):
I don't want you swivel sweeper, and I don't want
to be annoyed.
Speaker 1 (02:01):
Is there a chance you might change your mind in
the store.
Speaker 4 (02:03):
Absolutely no chance, okay, because you're pissing me off. You
don't call me every five minutes after I tell you no?
What's your problem?
Speaker 1 (02:10):
Can I send you some literature?
Speaker 3 (02:11):
Ma'am? I don't send me anything. Okay. Look, I wouldn't
buy it now if you gave it to me for nothing.
Speaker 4 (02:16):
Do you understand me? You piss me off because you
keep calling back.
Speaker 3 (02:20):
Now stop it. But ma'am, I don't care. There is
no button.
Speaker 1 (02:23):
You're being irate with me for no reason.
Speaker 4 (02:25):
Man, for no reason. I told you no, I don't
want it.
Speaker 3 (02:28):
You call back six fines. I think that's the reason.
Speaker 1 (02:30):
I want you to enjoy.
Speaker 3 (02:31):
No, and no means no, do not this house again.
Speaker 1 (02:34):
But we want you.
Speaker 3 (02:35):
I don't want anything.
Speaker 1 (02:37):
We want you to enjoy. This technology matter.
Speaker 3 (02:39):
I don't care.
Speaker 1 (02:39):
It's revolutionary.
Speaker 3 (02:41):
I don't give a damn what it is. I wouldn't
buy it now if you if it gave it to
me for nothing, Okay, ma'am.
Speaker 1 (02:46):
If you act now, we'll send you these removable dust
trays absolutely free.
Speaker 3 (02:49):
I don't care. Leave me alone, Do not call me back.
Speaker 1 (02:53):
Not call me back, tile floors.
Speaker 3 (02:55):
It's lightweight, man, I don't give it what it is, okay,
I don't care it runs, don't care.
Speaker 4 (03:04):
Call me back me back.
Speaker 3 (03:06):
Do not call me.
Speaker 1 (03:07):
Back forty five minutes.
Speaker 4 (03:09):
I don't care. I wouldn't bite it now because it
pissed me off.
Speaker 1 (03:15):
It has four waight action brushes. It reaches those hard
to reach places, ma'am. It picks up dirt and pet hair,
and I.
Speaker 4 (03:23):
Don't care what it picks up.
Speaker 1 (03:24):
Okay, Well, do you have top floors? Ma'am? Do you
have cards?
Speaker 3 (03:28):
I'm not going to answer you anymore. Do not call
my house.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
Do you have wood?
Speaker 4 (03:33):
Did you just hear me? Did you just hear me?
Speaker 3 (03:35):
Look?
Speaker 4 (03:36):
Hanging up?
Speaker 3 (03:37):
Do not call my house again. But the next time
I'm going to get a trace on you, I will
throw I'll throw.
Speaker 1 (03:41):
These removable dust. Hello. Hello, this is mister Michael Oppenheimer.
Speaker 3 (03:50):
Again, you don't understand English.
Speaker 4 (03:52):
Look, I'm tracing this black hole.
Speaker 3 (03:54):
Okay, I'm telling you now, and I'm going to either
sue you or report it to your supervisors. Now, don't
call me again.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
It comes with a built in seven point.
Speaker 3 (04:01):
Two What part of no? I don't you want to
don't you want to stay?
Speaker 1 (04:05):
A seven point two volte.
Speaker 3 (04:06):
Rechargeable back goes on? But is that amazing?
Speaker 1 (04:09):
It's my job to sell these today.
Speaker 4 (04:10):
I don't give a damn.
Speaker 3 (04:11):
I said no, take no for an answer. If you
have getting your number, I'm trapping the call right now.
I'm going to report it to your supervisor. If you
have carpet this goes on. This is the call here again.
Speaker 1 (04:24):
It's a product for you, ma'am.
Speaker 3 (04:27):
What's your supervisor's name and the phone number?
Speaker 1 (04:30):
My supervisor is mister Duran.
Speaker 4 (04:32):
Mister Duran. And does he have a number, mister Duran.
Speaker 1 (04:35):
Yeah, it's a one eight hundred two four to two
zero one hundred.
Speaker 4 (04:40):
Okay, mister Duran. How much you want to bet if
I call this number, I won't get mister Duran.
Speaker 1 (04:45):
I believe it's a very good chance you'll get mister
Duran if you call that phone number. Yeah. And you
know what else? You've been phone tapped?
Speaker 4 (04:52):
No, you've been phone tapped.
Speaker 1 (04:54):
This is scary Jones from Elvis Durant in the morning.
Shell and your daughter's playing a joke on you.
Speaker 3 (04:59):
That's great, thank you.
Speaker 4 (05:00):
I'm gonna get my ass kicked.
Speaker 3 (05:05):
I think she's gonna get her ask kick the.
Speaker 1 (05:07):
Elvis Duran phone tap. This phone tab was pre recorded
with permission granted by all the participants.
Speaker 3 (05:14):
The Elvis Duran phone tap only on Elvis Duran in
the morning show
The Elvis Durand's Phone.
Speaker 2 (00:01):
Tap, The Return of Michael Oppenheimer. Oh, my mother hates
telemarketing phone calls. My mom's your typical Italian lady who
goes nuts when she's annoyed by anything. Therefore, wouldn't it
be hilarious if she got a call from mister Michael
Oppenheimer played by her own Scary Jones.
Speaker 1 (00:20):
Well, Kristin, thank you, Kristin.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
We are now going to phone tap your mom Scary
Jones as mister Michael Oppenheimer, it's going to call your
mom at home, as Kristin listens in in the background.
Let's listen into today's phone tap.
Speaker 3 (00:32):
Hello.
Speaker 1 (00:33):
Oh, yes, this is mister Michael Lomenheimer. But swivel sweeper
the best, most convenient cordless sweper. Ever, how are you
doing today.
Speaker 3 (00:39):
Mint, I'm doing fine.
Speaker 1 (00:41):
Oh we'd like to send you one of our cordless
swivel sweepers.
Speaker 3 (00:44):
I'm really not interested, but I thank you very much.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
The swivel sweeper is for use in the kitchen, the
family room, the dining room, the bathroom.
Speaker 3 (00:52):
I'm really not interested, thank you.
Speaker 1 (00:54):
It swivels three hundred and sixty degrees for easy movement.
Around furniture interested. Hello, Hello, Oh, yes, this is.
Speaker 3 (01:05):
Well. Please don't call back again. I do not want
a swivel sweeper. Thank you.
Speaker 1 (01:09):
Even the cleanest of houses can use a visit from
the cordless swivel sweeper.
Speaker 3 (01:14):
I don't want the sleeper. Please do not call here again.
Speaker 4 (01:17):
I'm not going to answer the phone.
Speaker 1 (01:23):
Hello, Yes, good afternoon. This is mister Michael.
Speaker 4 (01:26):
I told you I don't want it.
Speaker 3 (01:28):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (01:28):
What if I took ten dollars off the set?
Speaker 4 (01:30):
If it took nothing, okay, I don't want the sweeper.
Do not call again. What if I do not call again?
Speaker 3 (01:36):
Thank you?
Speaker 1 (01:37):
Complimentary shipping and handling. Hello, Hello, Hi the quote.
Speaker 4 (01:43):
Ye, look, my husband's a crap.
Speaker 1 (01:46):
Okay, I understand.
Speaker 3 (01:47):
I don't want to be bothered. I said, I don't
want the swivel sweeper.
Speaker 4 (01:51):
Leave me alone.
Speaker 1 (01:52):
You do understand that the cordless swivel sweeper as you.
Speaker 4 (01:54):
Yes, Look, I'm going to say this is the last time.
Speaker 3 (01:57):
I don't want you swivel sweeper, and I don't want
to be annoyed.
Speaker 1 (02:01):
Is there a chance you might change your mind in
the store.
Speaker 4 (02:03):
Absolutely no chance, okay, because you're pissing me off. You
don't call me every five minutes after I tell you no?
What's your problem?
Speaker 1 (02:10):
Can I send you some literature?
Speaker 3 (02:11):
Ma'am? I don't send me anything. Okay. Look, I wouldn't
buy it now if you gave it to me for nothing.
Speaker 4 (02:16):
Do you understand me? You piss me off because you
keep calling back.
Speaker 3 (02:20):
Now stop it. But ma'am, I don't care. There is
no button.
Speaker 1 (02:23):
You're being irate with me for no reason.
Speaker 4 (02:25):
Man, for no reason. I told you no, I don't
want it.
Speaker 3 (02:28):
You call back six fines. I think that's the reason.
Speaker 1 (02:30):
I want you to enjoy.
Speaker 3 (02:31):
No, and no means no, do not this house again.
Speaker 1 (02:34):
But we want you.
Speaker 3 (02:35):
I don't want anything.
Speaker 1 (02:37):
We want you to enjoy. This technology matter.
Speaker 3 (02:39):
I don't care.
Speaker 1 (02:39):
It's revolutionary.
Speaker 3 (02:41):
I don't give a damn what it is. I wouldn't
buy it now if you if it gave it to
me for nothing, Okay, ma'am.
Speaker 1 (02:46):
If you act now, we'll send you these removable dust
trays absolutely free.
Speaker 3 (02:49):
I don't care. Leave me alone, Do not call me back.
Speaker 1 (02:53):
Not call me back, tile floors.
Speaker 3 (02:55):
It's lightweight, man, I don't give it what it is, okay,
I don't care it runs, don't care.
Speaker 4 (03:04):
Call me back me back.
Speaker 3 (03:06):
Do not call me.
Speaker 1 (03:07):
Back forty five minutes.
Speaker 4 (03:09):
I don't care. I wouldn't bite it now because it
pissed me off.
Speaker 1 (03:15):
It has four waight action brushes. It reaches those hard
to reach places, ma'am. It picks up dirt and pet hair,
and I.
Speaker 4 (03:23):
Don't care what it picks up.
Speaker 1 (03:24):
Okay, Well, do you have top floors? Ma'am? Do you
have cards?
Speaker 3 (03:28):
I'm not going to answer you anymore. Do not call
my house.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
Do you have wood?
Speaker 4 (03:33):
Did you just hear me? Did you just hear me?
Speaker 3 (03:35):
Look?
Speaker 4 (03:36):
Hanging up?
Speaker 3 (03:37):
Do not call my house again. But the next time
I'm going to get a trace on you, I will
throw I'll throw.
Speaker 1 (03:41):
These removable dust. Hello. Hello, this is mister Michael Oppenheimer.
Speaker 3 (03:50):
Again, you don't understand English.
Speaker 4 (03:52):
Look, I'm tracing this black hole.
Speaker 3 (03:54):
Okay, I'm telling you now, and I'm going to either
sue you or report it to your supervisors. Now, don't
call me again.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
It comes with a built in seven point.
Speaker 3 (04:01):
Two What part of no? I don't you want to
don't you want to stay?
Speaker 1 (04:05):
A seven point two volte.
Speaker 3 (04:06):
Rechargeable back goes on? But is that amazing?
Speaker 1 (04:09):
It's my job to sell these today.
Speaker 4 (04:10):
I don't give a damn.
Speaker 3 (04:11):
I said no, take no for an answer. If you
have getting your number, I'm trapping the call right now.
I'm going to report it to your supervisor. If you
have carpet this goes on. This is the call here again.
Speaker 1 (04:24):
It's a product for you, ma'am.
Speaker 3 (04:27):
What's your supervisor's name and the phone number?
Speaker 1 (04:30):
My supervisor is mister Duran.
Speaker 4 (04:32):
Mister Duran. And does he have a number, mister Duran.
Speaker 1 (04:35):
Yeah, it's a one eight hundred two four to two
zero one hundred.
Speaker 4 (04:40):
Okay, mister Duran. How much you want to bet if
I call this number, I won't get mister Duran.
Speaker 1 (04:45):
I believe it's a very good chance you'll get mister
Duran if you call that phone number. Yeah. And you
know what else? You've been phone tapped?
Speaker 4 (04:52):
No, you've been phone tapped.
Speaker 1 (04:54):
This is scary Jones from Elvis Durant in the morning.
Shell and your daughter's playing a joke on you.
Speaker 3 (04:59):
That's great, thank you.
Speaker 4 (05:00):
I'm gonna get my ass kicked.
Speaker 3 (05:05):
I think she's gonna get her ask kick the.
Speaker 1 (05:07):
Elvis Duran phone tap. This phone tab was pre recorded
with permission granted by all the participants.
Speaker 3 (05:14):
The Elvis Duran phone tap only on Elvis Duran in
the morning show
Elvis Duran and the Morning Show ON DEMAND News
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