August 8, 2025 • 10 mins
On this episode of “Tommy Talk,” Tommy discusses something that is making him spiral: stop commenting on women’s bodies. This is a heated one! If you enjoyed this episode, make sure to subscribe, rate and review!
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
Hey, guys, welcome to Tommy Talk, a new weekly series
that is part of my I've Never Said This Before
podcast where I am talking about things that I've never
really publicly talked about before, things that you and I
and hopefully everybody listening can relate to. And today's topic
is one that I am really really revved up about,
and that topic is stop commenting on women's bodies. Oh boy, Okay,
(00:29):
I can't promise you that some curse words will not
be flying out of my mouth during this talk, because
it's something I'm really passionate about it. It's disgusting to
me that we are in twenty twenty five, a year
where I feel like we have seen so many mistakes
happen in decades and decades before us, and we are
(00:50):
still doing the same old shit that we have done forever.
I am so disappointed in the fact that media and
users on social media like to comment and pile on
women and pick apart their appearances. We see it far
too often, and what's the point. What is the damn point?
(01:11):
Does it make you feel better saying oh my god,
that girl looks fat, or oh my god, she's lost
way too much weight With ozepic and looks like a
skeleton who gives a shit, it's not your life. And
I don't know. I've always been very very strange with
commenting on how people look because I think it is
such a gross and vile thing. And the thing that's
really shocking to me is when I see people who
(01:32):
I feel like should be your biggest champions in the
world tearing you down. For example, as a gay man.
I'm going to relate this to me for a second.
As a gay man. I feel like some of the
worst things that I've ever been said about me, and
some of the meanest things that have been said about
me are from other gay men. And it's like, guys,
you know the struggles that we've been through as a community,
you know the fights I've had to fight, you know
(01:53):
the hardships I've had to face. Why are you tearing
me down when you know there's all this other shit
I have to deal with by just being gay. Like,
if anyone you should, you should get it, you should
want to lift me up, and I want to lift
you up. Why is it not the same right? And
I feel that like when a woman does that to
another woman, it's the same type of thing. Why? Why? Why? Why?
(02:15):
You know what it's like being a woman. I don't
know what it's like, but you do, right, And there's
different changes and phases throughout your life. I was raised
by many women. I have many women as my best friends. Like,
my world is women, and I know that they've gone through,
you know, ups and downs with hormones or stress or
things that can affect weight. So why are we commenting
(02:36):
on it when it's none of our damn business Like that,
that's a very personal thing. And going back to my
point of sometimes the people in your community being the
meanest to you, Like when I see another woman's tearing
another woman down, it breaks my heart. But worse than
that is when I see a dude doing it, Like, brother,
you don't need to be given your opinion as you
(02:57):
sit in a basement with a hand down your pants,
eating your friend or your lazed potato chips, Like, I'm
not interested in what you have to say about a
woman's body. Keep your opinion to yourself. It just blows
my mind that again, in twenty twenty five, we are
dealing with this shit, and I see people in media
writing really awful headlines quite a bit for a clickbait
(03:18):
for you know, for traffic on their website to get
people to open their article, commenting on women's bodies, putting
before's and afters, and saying the most horrendous things. And
it's like why, why, why is that interesting to people? Why? Why?
If people aren't clicking it, they wouldn't be writing it.
So it's kind of like we all have to take
responsibility for what we're putting out there. And guys, I
(03:41):
did a little tweet and post on social media because
I was so sick of seeing this. I've been seeing
it for so long, with so many different people, and
it it just breaks my heart. Like I always think
if I had a daughter, I'd be scared shitless that
she has to grow up in this world with the
people that write things that they do out there. So
I put some on social media, just kind of like
(04:01):
a knee jerk reaction, and you should have seen some
of the comments. I mean a lot of people were like, yeah,
like we're with you, rock on. But then I got
a lot of weird comments like okay, here's one. If
you don't post pictures of yourself or post your height
and weight on social media, Okay, who the hell is
(04:21):
doing that? For one, nobody will comment if somebody posts
their picture, we have free range to discuss their weight
online and comments are gonna flow. Why does that mean
you can talk about someone's weight if someone's gonna put
up a picture, Really that gives you free rein to talk?
I mean, I'm sorry, Am I high? Because I'm not
(04:42):
understanding the justification there. Just because you post a picture
on Instagram or one that you like doesn't mean you're
inviting comments about your weight. It means, oh, I like
this picture, it brings me joy. I'm posting it, not
I'm welcoming your opinion. So if that's a mentality that's
out there, I want to crush that shit right now. Wait,
here's another one that really it's got me going. Celebrities
(05:03):
know there will always be people that are going to
judge them no matter what, and it must be hard
on them. I don't know how they can deal with
it because it must be tough. However, it's part of
their job. Some aspects of their job is to look good. Guys,
am I going crazy? It is not somebody's job to
(05:24):
maintain a weight that is appropriate or comfortable for you. Like,
That's not their job. Their job is to make a
TV show, to make a movie, to sing a song,
to provide art and entertainment that makes you feel better
about your life. So why the hell are we going
turning around and making them feel bad about their life
by being who they are and posting pictures of who
(05:45):
they are in real time? Like that doesn't that doesn't
work for me. I'm sorry, it doesn't work for me.
And then somebody called me Mary Poppins when I posted that,
and I'm like, Mary Poppins, why are you calling me
Mary Poppins? Or they're trying to say, I'm like, oh,
I'm prim and proper and clutching my pearls because I'm upset. Well,
you know what, I will be Mary Poppins, because Mary
Poppins at least knew how to treat people like. It's
(06:06):
just so funny, the uh friction that can be caused
when you talk about this, because there are people out
there who believe, if you were in the public eye,
you deserve to have whatever said about you, and I
just don't think that's fair. And there's going to be
people who don't agree with me on this, but I
(06:28):
just would say to those people, think about your best friends,
think about your family, think about your daughter, think about
your cousin, think about just someone you love, a woman
you love. Would you want them being talked to and
treated like that? I don't think so. And behind a screen,
everybody has big balls and they want to say whatever
they want to say. But if you want to walk
(06:50):
up to somebody and say it, why would you type it,
why would you print it, why would you publish it?
These are people, These are emotions, These are humans that
you know what you say hurts. Oh my god, I'm
just so over it. I'm so over it because in
the grand scheme of things, what somebody's weight is, what
(07:12):
somebody looks like has zero effect on you. And what
does speaking negatively do for your being? And this isn't
a message to my listeners, because I know you all
are good people and you wantn't dare talk about anybody
in this way, So this isn't for you. This is
more of event that I guess. I just want you
to know that I see you and I feel you,
(07:34):
and for all my women listeners, like, I am so
sorry that you have to go through this and deal
with this because it's bullshit and I will do everything
I can in my position in media to encourage conversations
that don't involve this and don't circle around this. In fact,
there was a magazine that posted a headline that was
really gross and misleading, kind of pinning women against each other.
(07:55):
And I commented on it. And it's a show that
covers my show all the time and writes about my
show gives me great press. But you know what, at
the end of the day, wrong is wrong, and I'm
not gonna sit back and watch you tear somebody down
for a headline like I'm sorry, I'm not and I'm
not and I'm not sitting here like woe is me,
I'm the perfect being. That's not like, don't get me wrong,
that's not that's not my jam. But there's one thing
(08:19):
I know for a shore I don't do, and I
do not, like ever comment on a woman's wait. If anything,
I'll say to a woman, oh my god, you look amazing,
or wow, you look so great tonight, like I will
build you up, but I'm not gonna tear you down
like that's just ridiculous. So let's please, for the love
(08:40):
of God, as a society stop commenting on how women
look cause I can promise you they're not interested in
hearing your thoughts. They don't care if you have criticism.
At least the people I've talked to, they don't want
to hear from you about that. And if you're a woman,
like please, lift up your sisters, like please. And if
you're a man, shut your mouth because nobody wants to
(09:01):
hear your opinion. Okay, I am so riled up. I
need to go like I don't know, do yoga or
have a cocktail. Not open social media because I cannot
risk seeing anything right now. But for all my ladies
out there, I love you, I got you, I support you.
I will do whatever I can to be a champion
for you. Sign it off. I've Never Said This Before
(09:25):
is hosted by me Tommy Dedario. This podcast is executive
produced by Andrew Puglisi at iHeartRadio and by Me Tommy,
with editing by Joshua Colaudney. I've Never Said This Before
is part of the Elvis Duran podcast network on iHeart Podcasts.
For more, rate review and subscribe to our show. And
(09:45):
if you like this episode, tell your friends. Until next time,
I'm Tommy Dedario.
Hey, guys, welcome to Tommy Talk, a new weekly series
that is part of my I've Never Said This Before
podcast where I am talking about things that I've never
really publicly talked about before, things that you and I
and hopefully everybody listening can relate to. And today's topic
is one that I am really really revved up about,
and that topic is stop commenting on women's bodies. Oh boy, Okay,
(00:29):
I can't promise you that some curse words will not
be flying out of my mouth during this talk, because
it's something I'm really passionate about it. It's disgusting to
me that we are in twenty twenty five, a year
where I feel like we have seen so many mistakes
happen in decades and decades before us, and we are
(00:50):
still doing the same old shit that we have done forever.
I am so disappointed in the fact that media and
users on social media like to comment and pile on
women and pick apart their appearances. We see it far
too often, and what's the point. What is the damn point?
(01:11):
Does it make you feel better saying oh my god,
that girl looks fat, or oh my god, she's lost
way too much weight With ozepic and looks like a
skeleton who gives a shit, it's not your life. And
I don't know. I've always been very very strange with
commenting on how people look because I think it is
such a gross and vile thing. And the thing that's
really shocking to me is when I see people who
(01:32):
I feel like should be your biggest champions in the
world tearing you down. For example, as a gay man.
I'm going to relate this to me for a second.
As a gay man. I feel like some of the
worst things that I've ever been said about me, and
some of the meanest things that have been said about
me are from other gay men. And it's like, guys,
you know the struggles that we've been through as a community,
you know the fights I've had to fight, you know
(01:53):
the hardships I've had to face. Why are you tearing
me down when you know there's all this other shit
I have to deal with by just being gay. Like,
if anyone you should, you should get it, you should
want to lift me up, and I want to lift
you up. Why is it not the same right? And
I feel that like when a woman does that to
another woman, it's the same type of thing. Why? Why? Why? Why?
(02:15):
You know what it's like being a woman. I don't
know what it's like, but you do, right, And there's
different changes and phases throughout your life. I was raised
by many women. I have many women as my best friends. Like,
my world is women, and I know that they've gone through,
you know, ups and downs with hormones or stress or
things that can affect weight. So why are we commenting
(02:36):
on it when it's none of our damn business Like that,
that's a very personal thing. And going back to my
point of sometimes the people in your community being the
meanest to you, Like when I see another woman's tearing
another woman down, it breaks my heart. But worse than
that is when I see a dude doing it, Like, brother,
you don't need to be given your opinion as you
(02:57):
sit in a basement with a hand down your pants,
eating your friend or your lazed potato chips, Like, I'm
not interested in what you have to say about a
woman's body. Keep your opinion to yourself. It just blows
my mind that again, in twenty twenty five, we are
dealing with this shit, and I see people in media
writing really awful headlines quite a bit for a clickbait
(03:18):
for you know, for traffic on their website to get
people to open their article, commenting on women's bodies, putting
before's and afters, and saying the most horrendous things. And
it's like why, why, why is that interesting to people? Why? Why?
If people aren't clicking it, they wouldn't be writing it.
So it's kind of like we all have to take
responsibility for what we're putting out there. And guys, I
(03:41):
did a little tweet and post on social media because
I was so sick of seeing this. I've been seeing
it for so long, with so many different people, and
it it just breaks my heart. Like I always think
if I had a daughter, I'd be scared shitless that
she has to grow up in this world with the
people that write things that they do out there. So
I put some on social media, just kind of like
(04:01):
a knee jerk reaction, and you should have seen some
of the comments. I mean a lot of people were like, yeah,
like we're with you, rock on. But then I got
a lot of weird comments like okay, here's one. If
you don't post pictures of yourself or post your height
and weight on social media, Okay, who the hell is
(04:21):
doing that? For one, nobody will comment if somebody posts
their picture, we have free range to discuss their weight
online and comments are gonna flow. Why does that mean
you can talk about someone's weight if someone's gonna put
up a picture, Really that gives you free rein to talk?
I mean, I'm sorry, Am I high? Because I'm not
(04:42):
understanding the justification there. Just because you post a picture
on Instagram or one that you like doesn't mean you're
inviting comments about your weight. It means, oh, I like
this picture, it brings me joy. I'm posting it, not
I'm welcoming your opinion. So if that's a mentality that's
out there, I want to crush that shit right now. Wait,
here's another one that really it's got me going. Celebrities
(05:03):
know there will always be people that are going to
judge them no matter what, and it must be hard
on them. I don't know how they can deal with
it because it must be tough. However, it's part of
their job. Some aspects of their job is to look good. Guys,
am I going crazy? It is not somebody's job to
(05:24):
maintain a weight that is appropriate or comfortable for you. Like,
That's not their job. Their job is to make a
TV show, to make a movie, to sing a song,
to provide art and entertainment that makes you feel better
about your life. So why the hell are we going
turning around and making them feel bad about their life
by being who they are and posting pictures of who
(05:45):
they are in real time? Like that doesn't that doesn't
work for me. I'm sorry, it doesn't work for me.
And then somebody called me Mary Poppins when I posted that,
and I'm like, Mary Poppins, why are you calling me
Mary Poppins? Or they're trying to say, I'm like, oh,
I'm prim and proper and clutching my pearls because I'm upset. Well,
you know what, I will be Mary Poppins, because Mary
Poppins at least knew how to treat people like. It's
(06:06):
just so funny, the uh friction that can be caused
when you talk about this, because there are people out
there who believe, if you were in the public eye,
you deserve to have whatever said about you, and I
just don't think that's fair. And there's going to be
people who don't agree with me on this, but I
(06:28):
just would say to those people, think about your best friends,
think about your family, think about your daughter, think about
your cousin, think about just someone you love, a woman
you love. Would you want them being talked to and
treated like that? I don't think so. And behind a screen,
everybody has big balls and they want to say whatever
they want to say. But if you want to walk
(06:50):
up to somebody and say it, why would you type it,
why would you print it, why would you publish it?
These are people, These are emotions, These are humans that
you know what you say hurts. Oh my god, I'm
just so over it. I'm so over it because in
the grand scheme of things, what somebody's weight is, what
(07:12):
somebody looks like has zero effect on you. And what
does speaking negatively do for your being? And this isn't
a message to my listeners, because I know you all
are good people and you wantn't dare talk about anybody
in this way, So this isn't for you. This is
more of event that I guess. I just want you
to know that I see you and I feel you,
(07:34):
and for all my women listeners, like, I am so
sorry that you have to go through this and deal
with this because it's bullshit and I will do everything
I can in my position in media to encourage conversations
that don't involve this and don't circle around this. In fact,
there was a magazine that posted a headline that was
really gross and misleading, kind of pinning women against each other.
(07:55):
And I commented on it. And it's a show that
covers my show all the time and writes about my
show gives me great press. But you know what, at
the end of the day, wrong is wrong, and I'm
not gonna sit back and watch you tear somebody down
for a headline like I'm sorry, I'm not and I'm
not and I'm not sitting here like woe is me,
I'm the perfect being. That's not like, don't get me wrong,
that's not that's not my jam. But there's one thing
(08:19):
I know for a shore I don't do, and I
do not, like ever comment on a woman's wait. If anything,
I'll say to a woman, oh my god, you look amazing,
or wow, you look so great tonight, like I will
build you up, but I'm not gonna tear you down
like that's just ridiculous. So let's please, for the love
(08:40):
of God, as a society stop commenting on how women
look cause I can promise you they're not interested in
hearing your thoughts. They don't care if you have criticism.
At least the people I've talked to, they don't want
to hear from you about that. And if you're a woman,
like please, lift up your sisters, like please. And if
you're a man, shut your mouth because nobody wants to
(09:01):
hear your opinion. Okay, I am so riled up. I
need to go like I don't know, do yoga or
have a cocktail. Not open social media because I cannot
risk seeing anything right now. But for all my ladies
out there, I love you, I got you, I support you.
I will do whatever I can to be a champion
for you. Sign it off. I've Never Said This Before
(09:25):
is hosted by me Tommy Dedario. This podcast is executive
produced by Andrew Puglisi at iHeartRadio and by Me Tommy,
with editing by Joshua Colaudney. I've Never Said This Before
is part of the Elvis Duran podcast network on iHeart Podcasts.
For more, rate review and subscribe to our show. And
(09:45):
if you like this episode, tell your friends. Until next time,
I'm Tommy Dedario.
Elvis Duran and the Morning Show ON DEMAND News
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Special Summer Offer: Exclusively on Apple Podcasts, try our Dateline Premium subscription completely free for one month! With Dateline Premium, you get every episode ad-free plus exclusive bonus content.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!