September 12, 2025 • 12 mins
On this episode of “Tommy Talk,” Tommy discusses how dealing with anxiety led him to find a personal gratitude practice that changed his outlook on life. This gratitude practice can greatly improve your mental, emotional and even physical well-being, and I am opening up to share it with you today. For anyone looking for super simple ways to shift your perspective, this episode is for you.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:02):
Hey, guys, welcome to Tommy Talk. This is a new
weekly series that's part of my I've Never Said This
Before podcasts where I am talking about things that well,
I've never really publicly talked about before. It is totally unfiltered, unscripted.
I turn on my mic in my camera and Irock
and Roll and today's topic is why a simple gratitude
(00:24):
practice can change your life. So I'm going to get
really raw and kind of open and vulnerable here for
a minute and tell you guys that, admittedly, a couple
of years ago, I started getting really bad anxiety, and
the anxiety was very work related. I just wasn't being
(00:45):
made to feel super valued and appreciated in some of
the lines of work that I do with some of
the different companies over the years, and it left me
feeling really defeated and honestly like shit, Like I felt
really really bad about myself. And I think a lot
of people can sympathize and empathize with that in their
(01:08):
respective careers. But there's something especially lonely sometimes about being
your own boss, about being a freelancer. And I work
for amazing companies and dream companies. I mean, I'm so
grateful for it. But with that comes kind of you
working alone on your own little island a lot of
the time, and nobody really sees the immense, immense amount
(01:31):
of behind the scenes work that goes into bringing all
of the things to life right, so you just feel
alone sometimes. And I was really suffering from bad anxiety.
So I scheduled my first ever therapy session a couple
of years ago with this incredible woman, and we had
a session and it literally it just changed my entire
outlook in my perspectives. One of the things she said
(01:53):
to me, in fact, in that therapy session was, sometimes
it feels like I'm on a volleyball court and I
am bound the ball kind of up and down, up
and down, up and down volume to myself, and I
just want to be able to hit it over the
net and have someone catch it. But I don't have that,
and I often feel like I don't have that, and
it really put things in perspective to just kind of,
(02:16):
you know, justify that I can feel the way I
feel sometimes. But then I'm somebody who likes action and
I like to make changes to better my life. That's
always been my jam. I'm not small. Alesta wallow. I
don't like to say, you know, there's nothing we can do.
I'm like an action oriented goal setting Let's make things better.
We have one life to live, let's fucking go. So
(02:40):
over the last few years, I really started tapping into
my own gratitude practice. And I kid you not, and
I'm sorry if this sounds a little woo woo and whatever,
but you're here for a reason. It has changed my
entire life and my entire outlook. Of course, there's always
going to be a day that's not great, you know,
that's life. You're never going to have a perfect three
(03:00):
hundred and sixty five day year. But these tools have
helped me really tap into the things that make me
feel good and make me feel appreciative and give me
gratitude and grace in my life so that when things
are tough, I can focus also on the things that
make life great. So here's what I do. And this
makes me feel super calm and just connected and grounded
(03:23):
and like I actually do have both feet on the
ground during a really kind of uneasy time that we're
all living in in this world. So the first thing
I do for my gratitude practice, and I've never really
talked about this. This is me being vulnerable and very
like I said, a little woo wooie, but I hope
it helps you. The first thing I do for my
gratitude practice is every morning when I walk to the gym,
(03:47):
I literally thank the universe and God whatever that means
to you for the things in my life, things that
can include you know, I'm thankful for the roof above
my head. I'm thankful for the friends and family I have,
or my husband, for my health. Whatever that list is,
I go through it and I kind of say it
(04:08):
to myself very quietly as I walk to the gym.
Literally say it out loud, not in your mind, just
gently say it out loud to yourself. So whether you
do that in your kitchen when you're doing dishes or
having a cup of coffee, it's just an important time
to do it. And it takes no more than I
don't know, a minute, right, takes a minute. Then I
say hello to the people in my life who have
(04:29):
passed away. I've lost some incredible people in my life,
and then I've had people who have died before I
was even bored, like my grandma who I've never met.
And I've started this dialogue with her over the last
few years, pretty consistently daily, to the point where I
feel like she knows me and I know her, and
it's just reassuring. It's just nice to feel like you
(04:51):
have people out there looking after you and hearing you
and listening to you, and that you can vent to
and talk to. So I have about five people who
have passed on my list, and I always say good
morning and good night too, and I talk to them sometimes.
I talk to them, sometimes I tell them what I
miss about them. Sometimes I ask them for guidance and
help for whatever's going on in my life. But having
that realization that there's so much more beyond just this,
(05:16):
beyond us, is something that makes me feel less anxious
as well. It just does. I can't explain why, but
it does. And I also express my gratitude for having
those relationships. While they're not physical, they mean everything to
me and I don't know what I would do without them.
Have I lost you, guys yet? I told you this
is a little woo WOOI I also am a really
big believer in putting out the things you want to attract,
(05:41):
and I'm not like this, you know, super super over
the top manifestor, but I keep it simple, and here's
what I say every morning, five times in a row.
I say, I am ready for all of the wonderful
and magical things that are coming my way today, professionally
and personally. I am ready for for all of the
magical and wonderful things that are coming my way today,
(06:03):
professionally and personally. I say it five times back to back,
and that just kind of clears the air, sets the
tone for you know, you being open to receive all
of the amazing things that may be coming personally and
professionally your way. I say it every single day, and
it just clears the energy. It keeps that anxious energy
away so that you are open to some amazing things
that may come your way that you don't even know
(06:23):
would come, but that will come. I also like to
focus any anxiety I have on other people, and in
those morning you know, messages or prayers or whatever you
want to call it. I also always wish for happiness
for all of the friends and family that I love,
and that their wildest dreams come true. And I think
that's just kind of a nice statement to put out
(06:43):
there to show you care and genuinely want the best
for other people, and I do. I want the people
in my life to have amazing, wonderful, happy, thriving lives.
So it's important for me to put that little little
notion out there for them. And that all takes I
don't know, four minutes total, three minutes total between the
(07:05):
talking and of the family members and friends who have
passed and saying what I'm grateful for and my wishes
for the people i love and my kind of daily
you know, manifestation of being open for all the good
things to come for the day. It really makes you
feel good, and that little practice reframes everything no matter
what kind of comes your way for the day. I
feel like setting up your day with that just makes
(07:28):
you feel good. And then of course life happens and
you work, and you have stress, and you have all
the things kind of going on in your daily life,
which is why I like to also end the day
by saying good night to the people that have passed
and by also saying, you know, these are the things
today that I'm grateful for that happened. And I never
realized I had this kind of deep gratitude practice until
(07:51):
my husband kind of pointed it out to me one
day and he's like, you really do have a pretty
intense and beautiful practice, And he actually came out with
the idea for me to share this today because it
is very personal to me, and I don't talk about
it a lot, and I think that whatever things you
guys do in your prayer time or your practice time,
that's personal. So I don't think to necessarily share that,
(08:13):
but I do think it's important because this has really
changed the game for me in terms of I feel
less anxious, I feel less stressed. I feel like, no
matter what life throws my way, I will always remember
and talk about and think about and be thankful for
the things that truly give me gratitude and that I feel,
you know, lucky to have in this life, even something
(08:36):
as simple as, you know, a roof above my head.
And I mentioned that earlier. I say it every day.
I genuinely am grateful for that. I mean, why wouldn't it.
We be life's hard, man, Life's hard, and you have
to count your blessings. So being able to focus on
not just work, not just the bad things, not just
the stresses that come up, and constantly daily remind yourself
(08:57):
of what is good in your life. Then there's good.
You gotta look for it sometimes, but there's good. I
think is such a beautiful and necessary way to stay present,
to stay grateful, to stay happy, to stay away from
the misery and the pitfalls and falling into a negativity
(09:18):
cycle of spinning and spewing out things that are not
serving you for the higher good. Right, So, gratitude is
so so important. Some people like to journal, some people
like to write the things are grateful for down rock on.
If that's your vibe, I just say it to myself.
I say it to myself, and I really carve out
those few minutes in the morning to do it in
(09:38):
a few minutes right before bed as I'm falling asleep
to do it. Sometimes I fall asleep mid mid thought
in my mind, and that's okay, that's a beautiful way
to fall asleep. But I think that we have to
remember in the busyness of life to carve out time
to do that. So that's just the little things I do.
I'm sure there are more things I do that I
can't think of right now, but that's kind of my
(09:59):
tried and true and I think it gives great perspective
for your day. For your life, for your year, and
we should never stop being grateful for the things that
we do have. Life's hard, man, life is hard, and
there's not always going to be good days. But if
we can find a little bit of good in our day,
then it sets it's up for more success. And like
(10:19):
I said, it's helped me tremendously with my anxiety and
it's made me feel really really just frickin blessed and
grateful to be here. I know if wu wu is
not your thing, thank you for bearing with me on
this episode. But I'm just sharing my truth. I am
sharing my truth with you in hopes that you two
(10:40):
can feel better about whatever it is you're going through,
or just day to day feels just a little bit happier,
because that's what we all deserve. We all deserve that
we need to take care of our mind, body, and spirits.
Wellness is a huge thing for me. I think you
know that if you follow me by now. And I'm
not just big on exercising in the physicality of it all,
I'm getting better and better with my own mental health
(11:02):
and I think that's super super important. So here's to
being grateful and for celebrating the things in our lives
that make us feel good because you, my friends, you
deserve it. Now go get yourselves out of bed or
down the street or with a fun beverage and say
what you're grateful for. All right, Love you guys, You're
(11:22):
the best. I've Never Said This Before is hosted by Me,
Tommy Dedario. This podcast is executive produced by Andrew Publisi
at iHeartRadio and by Me Tommy, with editing by Joshua Colaudney.
I've Never Said This Before is part of the Elvis
Duran podcast Network on iHeart Podcasts. For more, rate review
(11:45):
and subscribe to our show and if you like this episode,
tell your friends. Until next time, I'm Tommy Dedario.
Hey, guys, welcome to Tommy Talk. This is a new
weekly series that's part of my I've Never Said This
Before podcasts where I am talking about things that well,
I've never really publicly talked about before. It is totally unfiltered, unscripted.
I turn on my mic in my camera and Irock
and Roll and today's topic is why a simple gratitude
(00:24):
practice can change your life. So I'm going to get
really raw and kind of open and vulnerable here for
a minute and tell you guys that, admittedly, a couple
of years ago, I started getting really bad anxiety, and
the anxiety was very work related. I just wasn't being
(00:45):
made to feel super valued and appreciated in some of
the lines of work that I do with some of
the different companies over the years, and it left me
feeling really defeated and honestly like shit, Like I felt
really really bad about myself. And I think a lot
of people can sympathize and empathize with that in their
(01:08):
respective careers. But there's something especially lonely sometimes about being
your own boss, about being a freelancer. And I work
for amazing companies and dream companies. I mean, I'm so
grateful for it. But with that comes kind of you
working alone on your own little island a lot of
the time, and nobody really sees the immense, immense amount
(01:31):
of behind the scenes work that goes into bringing all
of the things to life right, so you just feel
alone sometimes. And I was really suffering from bad anxiety.
So I scheduled my first ever therapy session a couple
of years ago with this incredible woman, and we had
a session and it literally it just changed my entire
outlook in my perspectives. One of the things she said
(01:53):
to me, in fact, in that therapy session was, sometimes
it feels like I'm on a volleyball court and I
am bound the ball kind of up and down, up
and down, up and down volume to myself, and I
just want to be able to hit it over the
net and have someone catch it. But I don't have that,
and I often feel like I don't have that, and
it really put things in perspective to just kind of,
(02:16):
you know, justify that I can feel the way I
feel sometimes. But then I'm somebody who likes action and
I like to make changes to better my life. That's
always been my jam. I'm not small. Alesta wallow. I
don't like to say, you know, there's nothing we can do.
I'm like an action oriented goal setting Let's make things better.
We have one life to live, let's fucking go. So
(02:40):
over the last few years, I really started tapping into
my own gratitude practice. And I kid you not, and
I'm sorry if this sounds a little woo woo and whatever,
but you're here for a reason. It has changed my
entire life and my entire outlook. Of course, there's always
going to be a day that's not great, you know,
that's life. You're never going to have a perfect three
(03:00):
hundred and sixty five day year. But these tools have
helped me really tap into the things that make me
feel good and make me feel appreciative and give me
gratitude and grace in my life so that when things
are tough, I can focus also on the things that
make life great. So here's what I do. And this
makes me feel super calm and just connected and grounded
(03:23):
and like I actually do have both feet on the
ground during a really kind of uneasy time that we're
all living in in this world. So the first thing
I do for my gratitude practice, and I've never really
talked about this. This is me being vulnerable and very
like I said, a little woo wooie, but I hope
it helps you. The first thing I do for my
gratitude practice is every morning when I walk to the gym,
(03:47):
I literally thank the universe and God whatever that means
to you for the things in my life, things that
can include you know, I'm thankful for the roof above
my head. I'm thankful for the friends and family I have,
or my husband, for my health. Whatever that list is,
I go through it and I kind of say it
(04:08):
to myself very quietly as I walk to the gym.
Literally say it out loud, not in your mind, just
gently say it out loud to yourself. So whether you
do that in your kitchen when you're doing dishes or
having a cup of coffee, it's just an important time
to do it. And it takes no more than I
don't know, a minute, right, takes a minute. Then I
say hello to the people in my life who have
(04:29):
passed away. I've lost some incredible people in my life,
and then I've had people who have died before I
was even bored, like my grandma who I've never met.
And I've started this dialogue with her over the last
few years, pretty consistently daily, to the point where I
feel like she knows me and I know her, and
it's just reassuring. It's just nice to feel like you
(04:51):
have people out there looking after you and hearing you
and listening to you, and that you can vent to
and talk to. So I have about five people who
have passed on my list, and I always say good
morning and good night too, and I talk to them sometimes.
I talk to them, sometimes I tell them what I
miss about them. Sometimes I ask them for guidance and
help for whatever's going on in my life. But having
that realization that there's so much more beyond just this,
(05:16):
beyond us, is something that makes me feel less anxious
as well. It just does. I can't explain why, but
it does. And I also express my gratitude for having
those relationships. While they're not physical, they mean everything to
me and I don't know what I would do without them.
Have I lost you, guys yet? I told you this
is a little woo WOOI I also am a really
big believer in putting out the things you want to attract,
(05:41):
and I'm not like this, you know, super super over
the top manifestor, but I keep it simple, and here's
what I say every morning, five times in a row.
I say, I am ready for all of the wonderful
and magical things that are coming my way today, professionally
and personally. I am ready for for all of the
magical and wonderful things that are coming my way today,
(06:03):
professionally and personally. I say it five times back to back,
and that just kind of clears the air, sets the
tone for you know, you being open to receive all
of the amazing things that may be coming personally and
professionally your way. I say it every single day, and
it just clears the energy. It keeps that anxious energy
away so that you are open to some amazing things
that may come your way that you don't even know
(06:23):
would come, but that will come. I also like to
focus any anxiety I have on other people, and in
those morning you know, messages or prayers or whatever you
want to call it. I also always wish for happiness
for all of the friends and family that I love,
and that their wildest dreams come true. And I think
that's just kind of a nice statement to put out
(06:43):
there to show you care and genuinely want the best
for other people, and I do. I want the people
in my life to have amazing, wonderful, happy, thriving lives.
So it's important for me to put that little little
notion out there for them. And that all takes I
don't know, four minutes total, three minutes total between the
(07:05):
talking and of the family members and friends who have
passed and saying what I'm grateful for and my wishes
for the people i love and my kind of daily
you know, manifestation of being open for all the good
things to come for the day. It really makes you
feel good, and that little practice reframes everything no matter
what kind of comes your way for the day. I
feel like setting up your day with that just makes
(07:28):
you feel good. And then of course life happens and
you work, and you have stress, and you have all
the things kind of going on in your daily life,
which is why I like to also end the day
by saying good night to the people that have passed
and by also saying, you know, these are the things
today that I'm grateful for that happened. And I never
realized I had this kind of deep gratitude practice until
(07:51):
my husband kind of pointed it out to me one
day and he's like, you really do have a pretty
intense and beautiful practice, And he actually came out with
the idea for me to share this today because it
is very personal to me, and I don't talk about
it a lot, and I think that whatever things you
guys do in your prayer time or your practice time,
that's personal. So I don't think to necessarily share that,
(08:13):
but I do think it's important because this has really
changed the game for me in terms of I feel
less anxious, I feel less stressed. I feel like, no
matter what life throws my way, I will always remember
and talk about and think about and be thankful for
the things that truly give me gratitude and that I feel,
you know, lucky to have in this life, even something
(08:36):
as simple as, you know, a roof above my head.
And I mentioned that earlier. I say it every day.
I genuinely am grateful for that. I mean, why wouldn't it.
We be life's hard, man, Life's hard, and you have
to count your blessings. So being able to focus on
not just work, not just the bad things, not just
the stresses that come up, and constantly daily remind yourself
(08:57):
of what is good in your life. Then there's good.
You gotta look for it sometimes, but there's good. I
think is such a beautiful and necessary way to stay present,
to stay grateful, to stay happy, to stay away from
the misery and the pitfalls and falling into a negativity
(09:18):
cycle of spinning and spewing out things that are not
serving you for the higher good. Right, So, gratitude is
so so important. Some people like to journal, some people
like to write the things are grateful for down rock on.
If that's your vibe, I just say it to myself.
I say it to myself, and I really carve out
those few minutes in the morning to do it in
(09:38):
a few minutes right before bed as I'm falling asleep
to do it. Sometimes I fall asleep mid mid thought
in my mind, and that's okay, that's a beautiful way
to fall asleep. But I think that we have to
remember in the busyness of life to carve out time
to do that. So that's just the little things I do.
I'm sure there are more things I do that I
can't think of right now, but that's kind of my
(09:59):
tried and true and I think it gives great perspective
for your day. For your life, for your year, and
we should never stop being grateful for the things that
we do have. Life's hard, man, life is hard, and
there's not always going to be good days. But if
we can find a little bit of good in our day,
then it sets it's up for more success. And like
(10:19):
I said, it's helped me tremendously with my anxiety and
it's made me feel really really just frickin blessed and
grateful to be here. I know if wu wu is
not your thing, thank you for bearing with me on
this episode. But I'm just sharing my truth. I am
sharing my truth with you in hopes that you two
(10:40):
can feel better about whatever it is you're going through,
or just day to day feels just a little bit happier,
because that's what we all deserve. We all deserve that
we need to take care of our mind, body, and spirits.
Wellness is a huge thing for me. I think you
know that if you follow me by now. And I'm
not just big on exercising in the physicality of it all,
I'm getting better and better with my own mental health
(11:02):
and I think that's super super important. So here's to
being grateful and for celebrating the things in our lives
that make us feel good because you, my friends, you
deserve it. Now go get yourselves out of bed or
down the street or with a fun beverage and say
what you're grateful for. All right, Love you guys, You're
(11:22):
the best. I've Never Said This Before is hosted by Me,
Tommy Dedario. This podcast is executive produced by Andrew Publisi
at iHeartRadio and by Me Tommy, with editing by Joshua Colaudney.
I've Never Said This Before is part of the Elvis
Duran podcast Network on iHeart Podcasts. For more, rate review
(11:45):
and subscribe to our show and if you like this episode,
tell your friends. Until next time, I'm Tommy Dedario.
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