Rejoice, for I bring thee tidings of great schadenfreude: Elon Musk hath lost a whole Bill Gates.
1. He Did This To Himself
Tesla’s stock hath crashed over 40% since December, wiping out $111 billion of Elon’s fortune. Turns out, investors don’t love it when a CEO ditches his own company to spend his days boosting Nazis and banning journalists.
And who smote him most? His best bro Don-old. Trump’s new tariffs on China, Canada, and Mexico are wrecking Tesla’s supply chains, and the stock market took one look and said nah. Funny how licking fascist boots always ends in you getting your face stomped.
Yet despite losing more money than the entire net worth of Bill Gates, Musk remains the world’s richest idiot. Will he learn? Nay. He shall keep wreaking havoc and pretending he isn’t the dumbest rich guy alive.
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