December 18, 2025 • 16 mins
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Doctor Mesh.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
Hello up, So I have a segment idea. That's what
I DM do you about? So I thought we could
call it.
Speaker 3 (00:07):
Why am I like this?
Speaker 1 (00:08):
Okay?
Speaker 2 (00:09):
And people could call in and say things that they
either judge themselves about or judge other people about.
Speaker 3 (00:16):
So it could be like, you know, why am I
like this?
Speaker 2 (00:19):
Why do I not work out when I know it's
better for my health? Or why do I go to
the drive through instead of making a healthy meal? So
the things that maybe you're confused about yourself about or
judge someone else, And then I could give kind of
a general reason for the pattern behind the behavior so
that you could understand yourself.
Speaker 1 (00:39):
Better that part of it, because you are a doctor.
Speaker 2 (00:42):
For real, I am of psychology.
Speaker 1 (00:45):
Oh I got one? Who else?
Speaker 3 (00:47):
Gaz?
Speaker 4 (00:48):
Did you guys all have one.
Speaker 5 (00:51):
Gallant yet?
Speaker 6 (00:53):
So help?
Speaker 1 (00:53):
Come? Let me give you one.
Speaker 7 (00:54):
Speaking of food stuff, like, so all day I can
eat super super healthy like you know, like well balanced protein,
and then sometime at night I will see something sweet
and I want to devour with my entire being. Why
is it that you create sud stuff at night?
Speaker 3 (01:13):
That's a super common one.
Speaker 2 (01:15):
So when you have super rigid rules throughout the day.
As a human, you're naturally going to want to do
the opposite of that. We only have that rigidity for
so long, so whether that's in a day or over
the course of months or years, eventually, because we are
human or not robots, like, we don't just deal with logic.
We're dealing with emotions, and so it's natural that you're
(01:37):
gonna want to swing the other way. So you want
to have a lot less rules and flexibility and autonomy
throughout the day. So one thing I'd recommend is even
having like planned little moments where.
Speaker 3 (01:49):
You nurture yourself.
Speaker 2 (01:50):
It could even be something like a cookie, but it
sit down, take a deep breath, get really excited, take
a bike, close your eyes, and have kind of those
planned moments, and then it won't feel like you went
the whole day trying to be so good, so perfect,
following all the rules.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
That's good. I like that. I like that.
Speaker 5 (02:08):
Okay, so why am I like this? I So I
had nothing really on the schedule, but then I proceeded
to invite my sisters over the Monday of Christmas and
then a girl's brunch the Tuesday of Christmas, and I
made the plans and now I'm stressed about them.
Speaker 2 (02:29):
So it definitely sounds like you were looking for connection,
which is great, we all need connection. But then you
over extended yourself. So is this a pattern that you've
done other places or is this just with the holidays?
Speaker 5 (02:42):
No, I think I tend to do that every once
in a while, like, for instance, for in it, I
sign up for snack day for the kids, all end
up overdoing it and personalized water bottle and snack bags
for them instead of just putting stuffs in a paper bag.
Speaker 2 (02:57):
Yeah, so you really value we know you value you,
you know, beauty and those kinds of things that's important
to you. But it sounds like you also value that
like being over the top and doing all the things,
And because you value that so much, you'll sort of
ignore suppress the parts of you that are like, yeah,
but I actually just don't want to do that. I'm
actually too exhausted to do that. So you kind of
(03:18):
have to acknowledge the feelings that are happening, like, yes,
I really want to do that, but what's my capacity?
Speaker 3 (03:22):
And am I going to kind.
Speaker 2 (03:24):
Of rob myself of peace and sanity if I agree
to all those things? Because there's nothing more important than
your peace?
Speaker 1 (03:30):
Okay, doctor me real quick.
Speaker 8 (03:32):
I'll just throw this one out at you and then
we'll take calls and you can help people.
Speaker 1 (03:35):
But why am I like this?
Speaker 8 (03:36):
When I'm on the treadmill working out, I like to
visualize Rich in the shower lathering himself, upsh and then
manscape in.
Speaker 2 (03:43):
Manscape way too much to unpack. Yeah, we don't have
time for that, Okay, all right?
Speaker 8 (03:48):
Eight seven seven ninety three seven one four seven? Why
am I like this? We will talk to you next,
judging Rich. Okay, why am.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
I like this? We got doctor Mish on the line.
Good morning, doctor, Are you ready?
Speaker 3 (04:04):
I am ready? Good morning.
Speaker 8 (04:05):
So we just passed people through and they're gonna say
why am I like this? And you're gonna analyze it?
Speaker 3 (04:09):
Yeah, ok yeah, let's go.
Speaker 8 (04:10):
Let's start off with Ashley. Ashley, good morning.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
Go ahead.
Speaker 4 (04:16):
So I have a problem with when somebody gets quiet.
I internalize everything, but I also like I overextend myself
trying to make everybody happy.
Speaker 1 (04:26):
Why am I?
Speaker 4 (04:27):
I feel like I don't care what people think.
Speaker 8 (04:29):
You got to say why am I like this? Or
doesn't I say why am I? Dylan tell everyone to
say why am I like this, or it doesn't count.
Speaker 1 (04:35):
Okay, it doesn't count.
Speaker 3 (04:36):
Right, Why am I like this?
Speaker 2 (04:38):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (04:38):
No worries.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
The people pleasing tendency, uh is super super common, and
really that is because you really want to have the
energy in the room be good for everybody. But the
problem with that is that you're sacrificing your own So
it's like this initial little moment where it feels better
for you because they feel better, But then moments later
or hours later, when you're replaying it, you realize that
(05:01):
you kind of sacrificed your own feelings in that moment,
so we can't go around making everyone else feel comfortable
at the expense of ourselves. And in that moment it'll
feel like you're doing what's best for both of you,
but it's really hurting you in the end. So you're
doing it because you want to keep the energy and
the piece in the space and make everybody feel good. Yeah.
Speaker 4 (05:21):
Yeah, I mean it definitely makes sense. My boyfriend tells
me all the time, He's like, you have to stop,
like you're just doing too much and I over do it,
I guess, like trying to do it.
Speaker 2 (05:33):
Yeah, yeah, I mean you're a nurturer, right, you want
everything to feel good, but you got nurture yourself first, right, Well,
it definitely makes sense.
Speaker 3 (05:43):
It makes sense.
Speaker 1 (05:44):
That's why you're like that at Thanks for listen.
Speaker 9 (05:46):
Let's say, Angela, Hello, Hi, Why am I like this?
Speaker 3 (05:55):
So?
Speaker 6 (05:56):
I cry really easily when somebody is giving me praise
or like telling me nice things about myself.
Speaker 2 (06:05):
Interesting, So not if they're saying mean things, but nice things.
Speaker 3 (06:09):
Yeah, that's really true.
Speaker 1 (06:12):
I cry when other people get praise.
Speaker 7 (06:17):
Out of jealous ze.
Speaker 6 (06:20):
Yeah. So like when I'm getting like an annual review
at work, or you know, like at a Christmas party
and my boss is like, I appreciate you. Like, as
soon as I like hear somebody say like I appreciate you,
I like start to cry and I don't know why.
Speaker 3 (06:35):
Then they're so stupid.
Speaker 2 (06:38):
It's not stupid, right, You're human. Humans have feelings and emotions.
So first of all, just don't don't tell yourself that
because that's that's not true at all. But you have
all those emotions right there at the surface. That's not
a bad thing.
Speaker 3 (06:49):
And when your.
Speaker 2 (06:50):
Nervous system gets overwhelmed, whether that's because someone's saying something
positive or something negative, it has to release that has
to discharge that energy. So for you that comes through tears.
It could be a lot of other things. It could
be anger for some people, all kinds of ways we
discharge it. But basically, your nervous systems overwhelmed in that moment,
and so that's how it's just getting rid of the energy.
So you could stand up and jump up, down and
(07:12):
shake and get rid of the energy where you could
just let some tears out.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
Tell me, could it also be hormones?
Speaker 2 (07:19):
I mean, is this just a later thing in life
or has this been always doubt? I've always been like that.
Speaker 3 (07:27):
I've always been like this.
Speaker 1 (07:29):
Cal and I do commercials for Red Mountains. We'll talk
a lot about mountain.
Speaker 7 (07:36):
They'll put some hormones in you.
Speaker 2 (07:41):
Maybe not that, but you know, it could be. It's
just I don't think it's a negative thing. It's just
a matter of understanding that you're overwhelmed in that moment.
Speaker 3 (07:49):
So you could do a like some deep breathing and
just kind of reset.
Speaker 7 (07:52):
Let's try. Let's see if it worked. Angelie, you did
a really great job on the phone just now. Thank you,
thanks for listening.
Speaker 1 (08:04):
Thank you. Uh, how do you say your name? Sabra
it's Sabra, sab good morning.
Speaker 10 (08:12):
Good morning. So my question is I got diagnosed with
autism last year. Obviously later in life. I'm thirty three
years old, but I have a huge problem with talking
over people, whether this is at home, at work, or
to my kids, literally everywhere. I'm trying to figure out,
(08:33):
like why I do this? Why am I like this?
Speaker 2 (08:37):
Yeah, so that's that sounds like you're just really excited
and so you can't wait and have the patience to
wait for someone to finish. So what you're gonna have
to realize first is have awareness of when you want
to talk and are you aware of it and just
can't stop it or are you not even noticing any.
Speaker 10 (08:52):
Like this is no, I notice I do it, and
it's something that I've been like trying to work on,
but it's like and I instantly do it, and so
it's like, but I do, I do notice it, and
it drives me insane.
Speaker 2 (09:07):
Yeah, I would say that I would just work on
your sort of urgency and speed in life everywhere else,
not necessarily in that moment, because obviously if you could
slow it down right then and there, you would be.
But maybe there's times other times of the day where
you can put in those pauses, So have that an
alarm on your phone and just pause and take a
deep breath.
Speaker 3 (09:24):
Or when you are in the.
Speaker 2 (09:25):
Middle of something that's not quite as engaging as a conversation,
can you pause and breathe and challenge yourself in other
places before you put it right there in the most
challenging place, which is during conversation.
Speaker 8 (09:36):
Okay, I'd say, brout what happened? You're thirty three years old,
what made you go to wherever you went to get diagnosed?
Speaker 1 (09:41):
And what we're like?
Speaker 8 (09:42):
What made them say you have autism?
Speaker 10 (09:46):
Well, both of my kids have autism, and learning about autism,
I found out most of it not all the time,
but a lot of times. It is hereditary and I
have a lot of the same symptoms kids do. So
that is why I actually went and got tested.
Speaker 4 (10:07):
I'm sorry.
Speaker 10 (10:11):
So like my food cannot touch at all, Like I
literally have to use like a kid's plate. If they touch,
I won't eat it. I have really like I have
sensory issues with different like for instance, if it's not
like a microfiber, I cannot touch. Different types of clothing
I won't wear. My kids are the same way, I
(10:34):
have extreme like sensory overload, so like if lights are
too bright, sounds are too loud, stuff like that. So
it's like we don't have identical symptoms, but like one
of my sons is a level two. I'm also level
two and my younger son is level one, So there's
(10:56):
like a broad spectrum when it comes to autism.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
For sharing that with us, have a wonderful day.
Speaker 10 (11:02):
Absolutely for having me on you got it?
Speaker 1 (11:05):
Uh doctor me, She's pretty good. You're pretty good, doctor
mesh Chase.
Speaker 2 (11:09):
That happy to help out. And then if anybody wants
to kind of understand themselves better, have a free assessment
they can take and they'll just tell them kind of
what needs are being unmet so they can understand where
they could, you know, help themselves a little bit better.
Speaker 1 (11:23):
How do we find that?
Speaker 2 (11:24):
Yeah, so you could just head to any of my socials.
I'm cornhole niche. So that's come on here about.
Speaker 8 (11:32):
You know what, I was just talking to somebody yesterday.
I knew that was you. I was you put the
cornhole tournaments on ESPN.
Speaker 3 (11:37):
Right, Yes, you have silent reporting and commentating.
Speaker 1 (11:40):
Yes, get this, get this.
Speaker 8 (11:43):
I am interviewing the president of Phoenix Raceway. Natasha, she's amazing.
She's I'm interviewing her on the highly successful John J.
Vannis podcast and we're talking about COVID and she's talking
about her she's a sports family. Her parents, her care
husband or kids are all about sports. And during COVID,
this is this happened yesterday during COVID, She's like, we
(12:05):
were thirsty for sports. She goes, we started getting in
a corn hoole watching cornhole on TV. I go, I
know the lady that put that on. She would call
it all the time. ESPN Cornal tournament. That's you, right, doctor.
Speaker 3 (12:19):
Mesh, that's me. That's me. In fact, I'll be in
Mesa this summer. I can come see you guys. We're
doing a tournament there right on.
Speaker 1 (12:25):
So you could like do this live in the studio and.
Speaker 3 (12:27):
Yeah, yeah, totally.
Speaker 1 (12:29):
You need a whole hour to break down what's wrong
with John Jay? And we were ques.
Speaker 3 (12:32):
More than an hour, Yeah, no more than an hour.
Speaker 1 (12:34):
So I interrupted you what was your website or what's
your socials? Cornhole?
Speaker 3 (12:37):
Yes, cornhole? Cornhole?
Speaker 4 (12:38):
Me so cornhole?
Speaker 3 (12:39):
And then m E E.
Speaker 2 (12:41):
S H and that you can hop on your Instagram
or TikTok or whatever. And then if you look got
to the bio, there's a link there and it's just
a free assessment and that should help you kind of
understand what's going on.
Speaker 1 (12:50):
Corn.
Speaker 8 (12:51):
You know what, I actually self diagnosed myself with something.
I camebo with a new term last night and I
literally think I made this up. Let me tell you why. So,
my wife's sister had open heart surgery yesterday and Blake
was in the hospital and after the surgery was done,
it was eight hours successful.
Speaker 1 (13:08):
She's doing great, and my wife wanted to see her.
Speaker 8 (13:11):
So she walks in and sees her sister with tubes
in her just walks out of the room and tells everybody,
you guys should wait, don't go in there until the
tubes are out.
Speaker 1 (13:21):
Whatever.
Speaker 8 (13:22):
She gets in the car and she calls me and
she just breaks out crying, like the worst cry ever, right,
And as a husband, you hate that with him. She's
crying and she's in a parking structure. She can't handle it,
she can't. And I'm like, I'm like, she's alive, like
she's doing great, Like you know, in my head, I'm like,
suck it up, right.
Speaker 1 (13:39):
So no, no, I'm telling you what is going on head.
Speaker 8 (13:41):
So I'm like, I'm like, so then she I sit
there and I think, God, I wonder, like, how do
I not ever feel that way?
Speaker 1 (13:49):
Right? Like?
Speaker 8 (13:50):
My wife is such an impath. Like if she listens
to it, she'll go She'll do Christmas wish for us,
hear it, cry, listen to it on the radio the
next day and cry and cry and cry and cry cry. Right,
She'll watch a TV show and cry like all the time.
So she's an EmPATH. She feels with people. So I'm like,
I don't feel like that. And I remember one time
I was dating a girl when my first girlfriend and
(14:10):
we broke up, and you know, she cried. I remember
my friend Dave cried when he broke up his girlfriend,
and I remember I tried to cry and I wouldn't cry.
And then I remember telling him he was what happened
to you, Stephanie? We broke up, I cried, but I
didn't really cry. Come I needn't cry. Right, So here's
the term. I came up with myself dead inside empathological liar. Okay,
(14:33):
I am impathological liar. I thought it was last night.
Speaker 1 (14:42):
We needed two hours. Take that two hours.
Speaker 2 (14:46):
I mean it could catch on, it could catch on.
Speaker 3 (14:48):
We don't know.
Speaker 8 (14:48):
Take that term I'm someone tells that to you, like I,
I fake my sadness, empathological.
Speaker 11 (14:54):
We're going to have people like in situations who are
like and there's a lot of people that just don't
cry very much. That's fine, You're gonna be like, ignore me,
I'm gonna pathological.
Speaker 7 (15:04):
I feel like the most of the show over the
last twenty years has been Kyle and I trying to
share John Jay what it's like to be human.
Speaker 3 (15:14):
Dor Tandler Tandler from Friends.
Speaker 2 (15:16):
Remember Chandler couldn't cry the whole episode on that It's okay,
You're not alone.
Speaker 1 (15:20):
So he was an empathological liar.
Speaker 3 (15:22):
Yes, by the way, just doesn't cry.
Speaker 8 (15:25):
We just got a text that says, you sound like
your AI. You're not real.
Speaker 2 (15:31):
That's crazy because my entire like framework is being humans.
Speaker 3 (15:35):
So that's that's that's crazy.
Speaker 7 (15:37):
Tom more human.
Speaker 1 (15:39):
I'm gonna shave my Instagram handle to pathological.
Speaker 9 (15:41):
Liars, gonna be lovely. Everyone's yeah, but it's good, right,
that's a good term. Everything a mouthful, All right, thank you,
doctor Mishell. Well let's talk to you in twenty twenty six,
or when you're here in March, you come in the studio.
Speaker 3 (15:53):
Yeah, yeah, it'll only be summer. I think it's July,
but yeah, I'll let you guys know.
Speaker 1 (15:57):
We'll be here.
Speaker 3 (15:58):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (15:59):
We just in a five year deal. We're here for
a while. Okay, good to know, right doctor. We shall
have a great day, Happy holidays you too.
Speaker 3 (16:05):
Bye.
Doctor Mesh.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
Hello up, So I have a segment idea. That's what
I DM do you about? So I thought we could
call it.
Speaker 3 (00:07):
Why am I like this?
Speaker 1 (00:08):
Okay?
Speaker 2 (00:09):
And people could call in and say things that they
either judge themselves about or judge other people about.
Speaker 3 (00:16):
So it could be like, you know, why am I
like this?
Speaker 2 (00:19):
Why do I not work out when I know it's
better for my health? Or why do I go to
the drive through instead of making a healthy meal? So
the things that maybe you're confused about yourself about or
judge someone else, And then I could give kind of
a general reason for the pattern behind the behavior so
that you could understand yourself.
Speaker 1 (00:39):
Better that part of it, because you are a doctor.
Speaker 2 (00:42):
For real, I am of psychology.
Speaker 1 (00:45):
Oh I got one? Who else?
Speaker 3 (00:47):
Gaz?
Speaker 4 (00:48):
Did you guys all have one.
Speaker 5 (00:51):
Gallant yet?
Speaker 6 (00:53):
So help?
Speaker 1 (00:53):
Come? Let me give you one.
Speaker 7 (00:54):
Speaking of food stuff, like, so all day I can
eat super super healthy like you know, like well balanced protein,
and then sometime at night I will see something sweet
and I want to devour with my entire being. Why
is it that you create sud stuff at night?
Speaker 3 (01:13):
That's a super common one.
Speaker 2 (01:15):
So when you have super rigid rules throughout the day.
As a human, you're naturally going to want to do
the opposite of that. We only have that rigidity for
so long, so whether that's in a day or over
the course of months or years, eventually, because we are
human or not robots, like, we don't just deal with logic.
We're dealing with emotions, and so it's natural that you're
(01:37):
gonna want to swing the other way. So you want
to have a lot less rules and flexibility and autonomy
throughout the day. So one thing I'd recommend is even
having like planned little moments where.
Speaker 3 (01:49):
You nurture yourself.
Speaker 2 (01:50):
It could even be something like a cookie, but it
sit down, take a deep breath, get really excited, take
a bike, close your eyes, and have kind of those
planned moments, and then it won't feel like you went
the whole day trying to be so good, so perfect,
following all the rules.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
That's good. I like that. I like that.
Speaker 5 (02:08):
Okay, so why am I like this? I So I
had nothing really on the schedule, but then I proceeded
to invite my sisters over the Monday of Christmas and
then a girl's brunch the Tuesday of Christmas, and I
made the plans and now I'm stressed about them.
Speaker 2 (02:29):
So it definitely sounds like you were looking for connection,
which is great, we all need connection. But then you
over extended yourself. So is this a pattern that you've
done other places or is this just with the holidays?
Speaker 5 (02:42):
No, I think I tend to do that every once
in a while, like, for instance, for in it, I
sign up for snack day for the kids, all end
up overdoing it and personalized water bottle and snack bags
for them instead of just putting stuffs in a paper bag.
Speaker 2 (02:57):
Yeah, so you really value we know you value you,
you know, beauty and those kinds of things that's important
to you. But it sounds like you also value that
like being over the top and doing all the things,
And because you value that so much, you'll sort of
ignore suppress the parts of you that are like, yeah,
but I actually just don't want to do that. I'm
actually too exhausted to do that. So you kind of
(03:18):
have to acknowledge the feelings that are happening, like, yes,
I really want to do that, but what's my capacity?
Speaker 3 (03:22):
And am I going to kind.
Speaker 2 (03:24):
Of rob myself of peace and sanity if I agree
to all those things? Because there's nothing more important than
your peace?
Speaker 1 (03:30):
Okay, doctor me real quick.
Speaker 8 (03:32):
I'll just throw this one out at you and then
we'll take calls and you can help people.
Speaker 1 (03:35):
But why am I like this?
Speaker 8 (03:36):
When I'm on the treadmill working out, I like to
visualize Rich in the shower lathering himself, upsh and then
manscape in.
Speaker 2 (03:43):
Manscape way too much to unpack. Yeah, we don't have
time for that, Okay, all right?
Speaker 8 (03:48):
Eight seven seven ninety three seven one four seven? Why
am I like this? We will talk to you next,
judging Rich. Okay, why am.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
I like this? We got doctor Mish on the line.
Good morning, doctor, Are you ready?
Speaker 3 (04:04):
I am ready? Good morning.
Speaker 8 (04:05):
So we just passed people through and they're gonna say
why am I like this? And you're gonna analyze it?
Speaker 3 (04:09):
Yeah, ok yeah, let's go.
Speaker 8 (04:10):
Let's start off with Ashley. Ashley, good morning.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
Go ahead.
Speaker 4 (04:16):
So I have a problem with when somebody gets quiet.
I internalize everything, but I also like I overextend myself
trying to make everybody happy.
Speaker 1 (04:26):
Why am I?
Speaker 4 (04:27):
I feel like I don't care what people think.
Speaker 8 (04:29):
You got to say why am I like this? Or
doesn't I say why am I? Dylan tell everyone to
say why am I like this, or it doesn't count.
Speaker 1 (04:35):
Okay, it doesn't count.
Speaker 3 (04:36):
Right, Why am I like this?
Speaker 2 (04:38):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (04:38):
No worries.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
The people pleasing tendency, uh is super super common, and
really that is because you really want to have the
energy in the room be good for everybody. But the
problem with that is that you're sacrificing your own So
it's like this initial little moment where it feels better
for you because they feel better, But then moments later
or hours later, when you're replaying it, you realize that
(05:01):
you kind of sacrificed your own feelings in that moment,
so we can't go around making everyone else feel comfortable
at the expense of ourselves. And in that moment it'll
feel like you're doing what's best for both of you,
but it's really hurting you in the end. So you're
doing it because you want to keep the energy and
the piece in the space and make everybody feel good. Yeah.
Speaker 4 (05:21):
Yeah, I mean it definitely makes sense. My boyfriend tells
me all the time, He's like, you have to stop,
like you're just doing too much and I over do it,
I guess, like trying to do it.
Speaker 2 (05:33):
Yeah, yeah, I mean you're a nurturer, right, you want
everything to feel good, but you got nurture yourself first, right, Well,
it definitely makes sense.
Speaker 3 (05:43):
It makes sense.
Speaker 1 (05:44):
That's why you're like that at Thanks for listen.
Speaker 9 (05:46):
Let's say, Angela, Hello, Hi, Why am I like this?
Speaker 3 (05:55):
So?
Speaker 6 (05:56):
I cry really easily when somebody is giving me praise
or like telling me nice things about myself.
Speaker 2 (06:05):
Interesting, So not if they're saying mean things, but nice things.
Speaker 3 (06:09):
Yeah, that's really true.
Speaker 1 (06:12):
I cry when other people get praise.
Speaker 7 (06:17):
Out of jealous ze.
Speaker 6 (06:20):
Yeah. So like when I'm getting like an annual review
at work, or you know, like at a Christmas party
and my boss is like, I appreciate you. Like, as
soon as I like hear somebody say like I appreciate you,
I like start to cry and I don't know why.
Speaker 3 (06:35):
Then they're so stupid.
Speaker 2 (06:38):
It's not stupid, right, You're human. Humans have feelings and emotions.
So first of all, just don't don't tell yourself that
because that's that's not true at all. But you have
all those emotions right there at the surface. That's not
a bad thing.
Speaker 3 (06:49):
And when your.
Speaker 2 (06:50):
Nervous system gets overwhelmed, whether that's because someone's saying something
positive or something negative, it has to release that has
to discharge that energy. So for you that comes through tears.
It could be a lot of other things. It could
be anger for some people, all kinds of ways we
discharge it. But basically, your nervous systems overwhelmed in that moment,
and so that's how it's just getting rid of the energy.
So you could stand up and jump up, down and
(07:12):
shake and get rid of the energy where you could
just let some tears out.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
Tell me, could it also be hormones?
Speaker 2 (07:19):
I mean, is this just a later thing in life
or has this been always doubt? I've always been like that.
Speaker 3 (07:27):
I've always been like this.
Speaker 1 (07:29):
Cal and I do commercials for Red Mountains. We'll talk
a lot about mountain.
Speaker 7 (07:36):
They'll put some hormones in you.
Speaker 2 (07:41):
Maybe not that, but you know, it could be. It's
just I don't think it's a negative thing. It's just
a matter of understanding that you're overwhelmed in that moment.
Speaker 3 (07:49):
So you could do a like some deep breathing and
just kind of reset.
Speaker 7 (07:52):
Let's try. Let's see if it worked. Angelie, you did
a really great job on the phone just now. Thank you,
thanks for listening.
Speaker 1 (08:04):
Thank you. Uh, how do you say your name? Sabra
it's Sabra, sab good morning.
Speaker 10 (08:12):
Good morning. So my question is I got diagnosed with
autism last year. Obviously later in life. I'm thirty three
years old, but I have a huge problem with talking
over people, whether this is at home, at work, or
to my kids, literally everywhere. I'm trying to figure out,
(08:33):
like why I do this? Why am I like this?
Speaker 2 (08:37):
Yeah, so that's that sounds like you're just really excited
and so you can't wait and have the patience to
wait for someone to finish. So what you're gonna have
to realize first is have awareness of when you want
to talk and are you aware of it and just
can't stop it or are you not even noticing any.
Speaker 10 (08:52):
Like this is no, I notice I do it, and
it's something that I've been like trying to work on,
but it's like and I instantly do it, and so
it's like, but I do, I do notice it, and
it drives me insane.
Speaker 2 (09:07):
Yeah, I would say that I would just work on
your sort of urgency and speed in life everywhere else,
not necessarily in that moment, because obviously if you could
slow it down right then and there, you would be.
But maybe there's times other times of the day where
you can put in those pauses, So have that an
alarm on your phone and just pause and take a
deep breath.
Speaker 3 (09:24):
Or when you are in the.
Speaker 2 (09:25):
Middle of something that's not quite as engaging as a conversation,
can you pause and breathe and challenge yourself in other
places before you put it right there in the most
challenging place, which is during conversation.
Speaker 8 (09:36):
Okay, I'd say, brout what happened? You're thirty three years old,
what made you go to wherever you went to get diagnosed?
Speaker 1 (09:41):
And what we're like?
Speaker 8 (09:42):
What made them say you have autism?
Speaker 10 (09:46):
Well, both of my kids have autism, and learning about autism,
I found out most of it not all the time,
but a lot of times. It is hereditary and I
have a lot of the same symptoms kids do. So
that is why I actually went and got tested.
Speaker 4 (10:07):
I'm sorry.
Speaker 10 (10:11):
So like my food cannot touch at all, Like I
literally have to use like a kid's plate. If they touch,
I won't eat it. I have really like I have
sensory issues with different like for instance, if it's not
like a microfiber, I cannot touch. Different types of clothing
I won't wear. My kids are the same way, I
(10:34):
have extreme like sensory overload, so like if lights are
too bright, sounds are too loud, stuff like that. So
it's like we don't have identical symptoms, but like one
of my sons is a level two. I'm also level
two and my younger son is level one, So there's
(10:56):
like a broad spectrum when it comes to autism.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
For sharing that with us, have a wonderful day.
Speaker 10 (11:02):
Absolutely for having me on you got it?
Speaker 1 (11:05):
Uh doctor me, She's pretty good. You're pretty good, doctor
mesh Chase.
Speaker 2 (11:09):
That happy to help out. And then if anybody wants
to kind of understand themselves better, have a free assessment
they can take and they'll just tell them kind of
what needs are being unmet so they can understand where
they could, you know, help themselves a little bit better.
Speaker 1 (11:23):
How do we find that?
Speaker 2 (11:24):
Yeah, so you could just head to any of my socials.
I'm cornhole niche. So that's come on here about.
Speaker 8 (11:32):
You know what, I was just talking to somebody yesterday.
I knew that was you. I was you put the
cornhole tournaments on ESPN.
Speaker 3 (11:37):
Right, Yes, you have silent reporting and commentating.
Speaker 1 (11:40):
Yes, get this, get this.
Speaker 8 (11:43):
I am interviewing the president of Phoenix Raceway. Natasha, she's amazing.
She's I'm interviewing her on the highly successful John J.
Vannis podcast and we're talking about COVID and she's talking
about her she's a sports family. Her parents, her care
husband or kids are all about sports. And during COVID,
this is this happened yesterday during COVID, She's like, we
(12:05):
were thirsty for sports. She goes, we started getting in
a corn hoole watching cornhole on TV. I go, I
know the lady that put that on. She would call
it all the time. ESPN Cornal tournament. That's you, right, doctor.
Speaker 3 (12:19):
Mesh, that's me. That's me. In fact, I'll be in
Mesa this summer. I can come see you guys. We're
doing a tournament there right on.
Speaker 1 (12:25):
So you could like do this live in the studio and.
Speaker 3 (12:27):
Yeah, yeah, totally.
Speaker 1 (12:29):
You need a whole hour to break down what's wrong
with John Jay? And we were ques.
Speaker 3 (12:32):
More than an hour, Yeah, no more than an hour.
Speaker 1 (12:34):
So I interrupted you what was your website or what's
your socials? Cornhole?
Speaker 3 (12:37):
Yes, cornhole? Cornhole?
Speaker 4 (12:38):
Me so cornhole?
Speaker 3 (12:39):
And then m E E.
Speaker 2 (12:41):
S H and that you can hop on your Instagram
or TikTok or whatever. And then if you look got
to the bio, there's a link there and it's just
a free assessment and that should help you kind of
understand what's going on.
Speaker 1 (12:50):
Corn.
Speaker 8 (12:51):
You know what, I actually self diagnosed myself with something.
I camebo with a new term last night and I
literally think I made this up. Let me tell you why. So,
my wife's sister had open heart surgery yesterday and Blake
was in the hospital and after the surgery was done,
it was eight hours successful.
Speaker 1 (13:08):
She's doing great, and my wife wanted to see her.
Speaker 8 (13:11):
So she walks in and sees her sister with tubes
in her just walks out of the room and tells everybody,
you guys should wait, don't go in there until the
tubes are out.
Speaker 1 (13:21):
Whatever.
Speaker 8 (13:22):
She gets in the car and she calls me and
she just breaks out crying, like the worst cry ever, right,
And as a husband, you hate that with him. She's
crying and she's in a parking structure. She can't handle it,
she can't. And I'm like, I'm like, she's alive, like
she's doing great, Like you know, in my head, I'm like,
suck it up, right.
Speaker 1 (13:39):
So no, no, I'm telling you what is going on head.
Speaker 8 (13:41):
So I'm like, I'm like, so then she I sit
there and I think, God, I wonder, like, how do
I not ever feel that way?
Speaker 1 (13:49):
Right? Like?
Speaker 8 (13:50):
My wife is such an impath. Like if she listens
to it, she'll go She'll do Christmas wish for us,
hear it, cry, listen to it on the radio the
next day and cry and cry and cry and cry cry. Right,
She'll watch a TV show and cry like all the time.
So she's an EmPATH. She feels with people. So I'm like,
I don't feel like that. And I remember one time
I was dating a girl when my first girlfriend and
(14:10):
we broke up, and you know, she cried. I remember
my friend Dave cried when he broke up his girlfriend,
and I remember I tried to cry and I wouldn't cry.
And then I remember telling him he was what happened
to you, Stephanie? We broke up, I cried, but I
didn't really cry. Come I needn't cry. Right, So here's
the term. I came up with myself dead inside empathological liar. Okay,
(14:33):
I am impathological liar. I thought it was last night.
Speaker 1 (14:42):
We needed two hours. Take that two hours.
Speaker 2 (14:46):
I mean it could catch on, it could catch on.
Speaker 3 (14:48):
We don't know.
Speaker 8 (14:48):
Take that term I'm someone tells that to you, like I,
I fake my sadness, empathological.
Speaker 11 (14:54):
We're going to have people like in situations who are
like and there's a lot of people that just don't
cry very much. That's fine, You're gonna be like, ignore me,
I'm gonna pathological.
Speaker 7 (15:04):
I feel like the most of the show over the
last twenty years has been Kyle and I trying to
share John Jay what it's like to be human.
Speaker 3 (15:14):
Dor Tandler Tandler from Friends.
Speaker 2 (15:16):
Remember Chandler couldn't cry the whole episode on that It's okay,
You're not alone.
Speaker 1 (15:20):
So he was an empathological liar.
Speaker 3 (15:22):
Yes, by the way, just doesn't cry.
Speaker 8 (15:25):
We just got a text that says, you sound like
your AI. You're not real.
Speaker 2 (15:31):
That's crazy because my entire like framework is being humans.
Speaker 3 (15:35):
So that's that's that's crazy.
Speaker 7 (15:37):
Tom more human.
Speaker 1 (15:39):
I'm gonna shave my Instagram handle to pathological.
Speaker 9 (15:41):
Liars, gonna be lovely. Everyone's yeah, but it's good, right,
that's a good term. Everything a mouthful, All right, thank you,
doctor Mishell. Well let's talk to you in twenty twenty six,
or when you're here in March, you come in the studio.
Speaker 3 (15:53):
Yeah, yeah, it'll only be summer. I think it's July,
but yeah, I'll let you guys know.
Speaker 1 (15:57):
We'll be here.
Speaker 3 (15:58):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (15:59):
We just in a five year deal. We're here for
a while. Okay, good to know, right doctor. We shall
have a great day, Happy holidays you too.
Speaker 3 (16:05):
Bye.
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