Robin’s Affair: Once A Cheater, Always A Cheater?

Robin’s Affair: Once A Cheater, Always A Cheater?

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Robin terial Kid on Brisbane's Kiss. Let's talk about let's
talk about trashity, be let's talk about all the good
things and the bad things marriage can be. Yeah, that's
because there was lots of fun to be had last night.
The couples have moved into their apartments and have met

(00:23):
with some expert challenges, so they send them envelopes that
get delivered under their door and they get told to
do various things so that they can fast track their
relationships by revealing some secrets. So last night, Alyssa, who
was the former Mormon was from Utah, and Duncan, who
everyone considers to be the complete spunk of the entire

(00:44):
experiment because he's got a jaw line, like you know,
he is quite gorgeous. The former Mormon and Spunk and Duncan. Yes, anyway,
they last to reveal a secret that they haven't really
told anyone before, and Alyssa went first with this.

Speaker 2 (01:02):
I was complex in an affair.

Speaker 1 (01:07):
I was the other woman, and I knew that he
was a married man.

Speaker 2 (01:13):
I right, How was Duncan's face when that's coming out?

Speaker 1 (01:16):
Well, this is his reaction.

Speaker 3 (01:18):
I did not expect that at all. I was cheated
on when I was younger. I was a shell of
myself when happened to me. It rips people apart, pretty shocked.
I didn't think that you would have a confession like this.
I can understand when people stuff up sometimes when they

(01:42):
go out, but if you, like willingly, went into something
with someone that was married, then that's not a mistake, right,
It's a choice that's extremely poor behavior.

Speaker 2 (01:57):
He hasn't got as far as saying deal, break it,
but it sounds like he's pretty close.

Speaker 1 (02:00):
Yeah. Well, he wanted twenty four hours to sleep on it,
because it did go for six months. So she said,
this wasn't done or a two night thing. This was
a full on affair that went for six months. And
then the next day he came back and actually, to
his credit, he said, because you've been so honest, that's
actually made me respect you more and that I'm choosing
to go that you've learned from your mistakes, let's move forward. Okay,

(02:23):
would you make the same decision?

Speaker 2 (02:25):
I mean, I think that's big of him.

Speaker 4 (02:27):
Like I think and what he's saying there, like being
honest now shows that your honesty has become a big
thing for you.

Speaker 2 (02:33):
So that's obviously shows you learning. But so I respect him.

Speaker 4 (02:36):
For that, But you have to say, being someone who
was cheated on in my first marriage like that, that's
a deal breaker for me because it says you you
have willingly crossed a line you can you can no,
but you can rationally do it in your head with
someone that you're supposed to love or I guess that
in that case, to break up in someone else's marriage.

(02:58):
But you can rationally you can make it okay in
your head to do what you did, except that do
it over and over again.

Speaker 3 (03:03):
See.

Speaker 1 (03:03):
I disagree with that because I think that takes one
moment in someone's life where you don't understand the context
around it to understand why they made that choice. And
also it means that you don't think people learn from
their mistakes. Like if it's multiple like if someone has
done it multiple times to different people, that's a different
scenario that that's offer and I reckon someone who maybe

(03:25):
like just is addicted to the thrill of the chase
or trying to get someone who's unobtainable, that's a different thing.
If you do it once, I would want to know
why you did it and what was the context that
made you do it and why you are now admitting
to it now? Like, I just think people people grow
and change.

Speaker 2 (03:44):
You think they do change you reckon sh Yeah okay
I did.

Speaker 4 (03:48):
Yeah, what do you mean? Like you you cheated on
someone and then learn from it?

Speaker 1 (03:52):
Pretty much?

Speaker 2 (03:53):
Whoa okay? When?

Speaker 1 (03:56):
When?

Speaker 2 (03:57):
When is this?

Speaker 3 (03:59):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (04:00):
Look, it's not something I'm proud of. And again I'm
only saying it because it's been written in my book.
But but I yeah, we were separated but still living
in the same house. I did something that I wholeheartedly regret,
but I also recognize that I'm the sum total of
my life experiences. And yeah, I think you have to
realize that you make choices in moments, but you grow

(04:24):
from them. And I would never, like one hundred percent
I would do I would sacrifice a child then do
that again, like truly because it's horrendous the consequences, trying
not to cry.

Speaker 2 (04:39):
It's true, you know, you don't want to be that person.
It's awful.

Speaker 4 (04:43):
And who's the like the tears that you're getting now?
Is that did you hurt yourself or I hurt everyone?

Speaker 1 (04:49):
Hurt everyone, everyone absolutely, including my children, Like it's not okay,
but I also think that we have to come from
a place of compassion and and not then then I
deserved everything I got. But now years later, it's a
totally different story. And you can't look at the person
that was and look at the person that is and

(05:11):
say they're the same person.

Speaker 2 (05:13):
They're not. They're not. You know, life has.

Speaker 1 (05:15):
Dictated many other things to me. But yeah, I regret it.
I regret the pain I caused. I don't regret the
choices because I think they led to a different space
and I think that has made me who I am.
That's why I don't regret it. But I regret hurting people.

Speaker 4 (05:33):
But you do have to learn from it, and if
you can learn and change from it, then it's different things.

Speaker 1 (05:38):
And I think that what you said in the beginning
about the honesty is actually so true, Like if you
then value honesty above all else because you've seen the
dark side of what that does when you're dishonest, that
is actually the person to trust the most, because they've
seen the consequences of being dishonest and they've seen the
pain they've caused. And I would say they'd never do

(05:59):
it again. I wouldn't ever.

Speaker 2 (06:01):
Who would have thought we'd get something real out of maths.
What just Happenedian

Speaker 1 (06:07):
Kids on Brisbane's Kiss in ninety seventy three,