Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:15):
Pushkin.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Hi, Hello, I think people probably know the drill. We're
going to revisiting an old, an old episode, and we're
going to have an update.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
That's not good broadcasting. You don't say to people they
know the drill. You tell them the drill. You guys
your powers as a storytelling.
Speaker 2 (00:38):
Hey, everyone, here's the drill.
Speaker 1 (00:40):
And drills are exciting. Think of a fire drill when
you were in elementary school.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
How great was that you're getting out of class.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
Especially if you were in gym, like you ran outside
in the winter, snow and your shirt. It was great. So, yeah,
here's the drill.
Speaker 2 (00:55):
Today, we're going to listen to an episode called the Sky.
Speaker 3 (00:59):
Oh.
Speaker 1 (00:59):
It's a classic episode.
Speaker 4 (01:01):
You know.
Speaker 2 (01:02):
We get a lot of pitches about being cut out
of friend groups, about being bullied in some way. I
think it's unfortunately, like a pretty common story that a
lot of people can relate to. But what we really
liked about Sky's story is that we really liked that
it involved her son and that she was doing it
at the encouragement of her son.
Speaker 1 (01:22):
And now that same son from the story, get this.
This is a bit of a spoiler alert. He's now
an adult.
Speaker 2 (01:31):
Yeah, a young adult.
Speaker 1 (01:33):
That's what time will do to you. Yeah, make a
little kid, a young man, make an old man like me,
and even older man. Yeah sad.
Speaker 2 (01:40):
Really you remember the Joey episode?
Speaker 1 (01:42):
I do, of course.
Speaker 2 (01:44):
Do you remember how you did Sky and Joey on
the same trip.
Speaker 1 (01:46):
Oh, yeah, that's right.
Speaker 2 (01:47):
You did just like a week of knocking out people's problems.
Speaker 1 (01:51):
So productive, so helpful.
Speaker 2 (01:52):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:53):
I should have a private jet and on the side
it would say mister Helpful.
Speaker 2 (01:57):
And when you took off, people would clap like Superman
and they'd say thank you, mister helpful.
Speaker 1 (02:02):
Do you think there's a room in the Marvel universe
for a mister helpful?
Speaker 2 (02:06):
It's not the catchiest name.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
The power of helping people.
Speaker 2 (02:10):
Well, sit back, enjoy. And then we're going to hear
from Sky at the end.
Speaker 1 (02:15):
Oh, but first, a word from our sponsors high podcast friends.
As regular listeners know, I try to run a family
friendlish podcast. But because it's integral to the plot. In
this episode of Heavyweight, we drop the F bomb and
unprecedented nine times. If they were giving out peabodies for swearing,
(02:40):
maybe I'd get one. Also, as long as I'm giving advisories,
I also pronounced the word garage as garage, I encourage
you to listen anyway. Hello, did you get a message
from me a couple months ago? A phone message was
(03:01):
on your birthday. I was wishing you a happy birthday.
Speaker 5 (03:05):
It's possible I didn't.
Speaker 1 (03:07):
Hear anything back, so I was concer When someone leaves
your message on your birthday, you have no obligation to
return that message. But that's it. Oh my god, it
would have been nice to get. I'm not saying a
thank you card, but you know, if I.
Speaker 4 (03:22):
Was under non obligation, why are you now giving me
suggestions as to how I should have responded.
Speaker 1 (03:26):
Some things in life aren't obligatory, but we just do them,
you know what I mean?
Speaker 4 (03:29):
Absolutely, like picking up the phone when I just saw that,
you call.
Speaker 1 (03:33):
Me exactly like, Hey, wait a minute from Gimblet Media.
I'm Jonathan Goldstein and this is Heavyweight. Today's episode, sky
(04:01):
Sky and her son Clark ever ritual every night. After
his teeth are brushed and he's all tucked in, right
before Clark goes to sleep, Sky sits down on the
edge of his bed and they talk.
Speaker 4 (04:15):
What was your favorite part of that movie?
Speaker 6 (04:18):
Probably like the end was.
Speaker 4 (04:20):
A good helicopter.
Speaker 1 (04:22):
Clark's eleven, so naturally there's a lot of discussion about
comic books and movies.
Speaker 4 (04:28):
I don't think it was a movie, you know, the
original Jumanji was not funny.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
But there's something about the stillness of nighttime that also
frees Clark up to speak in a way that he
doesn't normally. Not only does he tell Sky about what
he's watching and reading, he tells her about his feelings.
He shares stories about what's going on at school, and
Sky shares stories too, stories from her childhood. Some stories
(04:54):
she tells just to entertain Clark, but other stories she
tells to impart a lesson. There's one story in particular
she's told Clark over and over again throughout the years.
It's been coming up a lot. Recently, Sky told me
the story.
Speaker 4 (05:14):
So the story, in a way, the story starts when
I moved.
Speaker 1 (05:19):
When she was eleven years old, Sky was best friends
with a group of four girls girl They wore a
spree sweatshirts and watched Love Boat on the weekends. They
were the popular girls.
Speaker 4 (05:30):
That was sort of the vibe of that group was
like we're exclusive and we're kind of the shit. Yeah,
you know, how like in high school they have you know,
most beautiful and most popular, and all of those. We
decided to make our own book of you know, awarding
people various prizes. We gave me best eyes, and I
(05:53):
remember sort of having this pride in.
Speaker 1 (05:56):
That they spent all the fifth grade together. Then summer
came and with it long days filled with lazy bike
rides and trips to the candy shop. But early one
summer morning, Sky I woke up to find her yard
had been tepeed, covered in toilet paper, and there was more.
Speaker 4 (06:15):
Someone had written fuck you on our garage door. And
we had a double garage, and so fuck was on
one and you was on the other, and they were
written in large white letters on our brown garage.
Speaker 1 (06:32):
Sky's mom had seen the vandals make their getaway. The
words fuck you had been written by none other than
Sky's for best friends.
Speaker 4 (06:43):
And they had been written in paint. I wish they
had done it was something that had come off, because
I do remember this feeling of like being driven home
day after day and seeing those words on the garage door.
Teeping someone's house is one thing. It's sort of a
common prank, but the fact that they wrote fuck you
(07:04):
that felt to me like it really came from anger.
And they had to have brought the paint, you know,
there had to have been some thought put into this.
Speaker 1 (07:14):
Why had they done it? What were they angry about?
Sky had no idea. Did you ever see those girls again?
Speaker 7 (07:27):
Well?
Speaker 4 (07:28):
I saw them again for sure. We all funneled into
this junior high school that fall, and I think that
I just avoided them. I never ever said a word
to any of the four girls ever. Again, I pretended
it never happened.
Speaker 1 (07:48):
And when Sky tells Clark this story, here's where she
delivers the moral. Awful things do happen, but in the
end everything turns out fine. Sky grew up, got married,
has a job she likes, and a family she loves.
Her story, she tells him, has a happy ending. In
the past. When he's heard the story, Clark's taken his
(08:10):
mom's lesson at face value. But Clark is now the
same age Sky was when her friends turned on her.
He's starting to see his own classmates leave old friends
behind for the more popular crowd. For the first time,
he's able to imagine what it would be like if
his own small group of friends suddenly cast him out,
stopped coming over to his house to play video games,
(08:31):
stop speaking to them altogether. So Sky's moral that everyone
lives happily ever after is starting to feel untrue, and
so Clark has a question for his mother, why didn't
she ever confront her friends about what they did? Why
not then? But also he asks Sky why not now?
Speaker 3 (08:57):
Like did they do it for themselves or because of you?
Or was it because of something you did or something.
Speaker 1 (09:05):
Clark brings up Sky's story during their bedtime ritual, looking
for details, weighing the injustice, fantasizing about Sky looking up
her old friends and confronting them with some questions.
Speaker 4 (09:18):
I think you.
Speaker 3 (09:18):
Can't be like the person that you normally are, where
you're like timid little mommy, funny City.
Speaker 4 (09:25):
That you think of me as timid mommy, that's very interesting.
Speaker 3 (09:28):
Yeah, well I have like a lot of occasions to
prove that your New Year's resolution was to say no
more often. That was your resolution because you were too
timid to say no to people before that.
Speaker 4 (09:44):
Well, I like to think that it's less about me
being timid and more about me being a canned do
kind of person. There it is right there.
Speaker 1 (09:58):
At school functions, Clark watches his mom try to accommodate
the other parents and get steamrolled in the process. In restaurants,
he sees his mom settled for the wrong meal rather
than bother the waiter. For once, he wants Guy to
stop worrying about everyone else's feelings. He wants her to
focus on herself.
Speaker 4 (10:17):
I would really love to know, like why it's important
to you.
Speaker 5 (10:22):
It's basically for.
Speaker 3 (10:23):
Me more like my mom avenging. Those people just wanted
you to kind of like get your avenge, my revenge,
avenge yourself. Sorry I'm using the wrong word. You got
to be like you did this, and do you remember
why it happened and say sorry to me?
Speaker 4 (10:47):
He said at the end, Mom, you've got to figure
this out. You've got to go for it. You have
to have a chance to find out why this happened.
Speaker 1 (11:03):
It's not just Clark who feels this way. There's someone
else who also wonders why this happened. And it's always
Sky had had the chance to ask, Hello, is this Rachel?
This is Sky's mom. Rachel the only eyewitnessed what happened
(11:23):
that night, and the person talking to her while chewing
a hunk of munster cheese and hollow bread because his boss,
Alex thinks taking lunch breaks is more of a BizOps thing,
is me.
Speaker 8 (11:36):
I got out of my chair and I stood at
the window and pulled back the drape, and I see
their bikes sort of going off into the night.
Speaker 1 (11:51):
The night the girl showed up, around two or three
in the morning, Rachel was reading in an armchair by
the window. She's always up in the middle of the night.
It's a habit that began in childhood. She tells me
that her own mom, Sky's grandmother suffered from schizophrenia. She
was unpredictable. In the middle of the night was the
only time the house was ever quiet and safe. Who
(12:13):
was during those calm nights alone that Rachel began writing poetry.
Speaker 4 (12:17):
And here I.
Speaker 8 (12:20):
Am, all these years later, and I'm still doing it.
There's something holy about the middle of the night. Nobody's
hassling you, and you can really hear yourself somehow.
Speaker 1 (12:36):
But on the night the vandals struck, she could also
hear four eleven year old girls making their getaway. When
the sun came up, Rachel saw the fuck you on
the garage, and immediately she phoned up one of the
girls and spoke with both her and her mom well
neither denied what had happened. Nothing much came of the conversation,
and after that Sky begged Rachel not to make any
(12:59):
more phone calls. The idea of confronting anyone just upset
Sky Moore. So Rachel stopped calling, and after a few
days things seemed to go back to normal.
Speaker 8 (13:11):
We felt it was over, and for her it really wasn't.
It really took her being i mean grown up, for
her to start saying to me, I think about this
all the time, and it was shocking to me. I
(13:33):
had not understood that, and I felt dopey that I
hadn't understood that because I thought I was pretty well
attuned to her and her feelings. It broke my heart.
(13:55):
She always understood how to sit in with people, completely
unlike her parents. My husband, you know, was born in
Finland and was a mathematician and had his PhD when
he was nineteen. And I was this strange high school
dropout poet. I mean, we were really odd and eccentric birds,
and here was this kid who was just exquisitely normal,
(14:19):
and to us, she's always been a wonder, you know, like,
who is this very social being, this is a kid
who whose first word was high, and who, when she
was small, literally sat on the front step all day
and said hi to every person who passed on the sidewalk,
(14:42):
and we loved her for that. And what happened with
the girls. This had the effect of making her more
you know, pulling in her wings.
Speaker 1 (14:57):
And this is the person Clark sees today, someone who
keeps her wings tucked in so tight for fear of
them getting in anyone's way, and she's forgotten how to
open them. Rachel knows that Clark has recently begun urging
his mom to be less timid, and she approves there's.
Speaker 8 (15:14):
Something authoritative about a child they haven't had. They're not
all hammered by doubts and worries about what they're saying.
They're like, well, why didn't you do this?
Speaker 1 (15:26):
You know, Rachel had asked me to call at the
end of her work night. It's now seven thirty AM,
close to her bedtime, so we say, oh goodbyes, But
just before putting down the phone, she offers a final benediction.
Speaker 8 (15:42):
I thought was so beautiful the way he wanted her
to figure this out. Because she'll hear that from him
in a way that she probably could never hear that
from me, it has more of a chance to wake
her up.
Speaker 1 (16:00):
And with that, Rachel heads off to bed, and I
turned back to Sky, who, with a little help from Clark,
is still trying to wake up.
Speaker 4 (16:10):
He does have this sense of but that's an unfinished thing.
Speaker 1 (16:14):
Yeah, like the good that this good ending hasn't fully
happened yet.
Speaker 4 (16:20):
Yeah, yeah, the good ending hasn't happened. Now. It's sort
of turning into a different story, which is that it's
kind of never too late to summon courage and do
something that that scares you. I guess in a way,
(16:43):
I want to live up to his to who I
think he'd like me to be, you know, I think
like I need to show him that I can stand
up for myself.
Speaker 1 (17:04):
Thirty five years later, and Sky's finally decided she's ready.
She just needs help reaching the girls and not backing
down when she does. So, you want to do this?
Speaker 4 (17:17):
I think that I want to do this. Yes, I
want to do this. You know. Now I'll be able
to say I did what I could.
Speaker 1 (17:28):
And if you want to be able to say you
did what you could to save scads of cash with
some truly great deals. Here's the chance you've been dreaming
of your entire life. Sky and I get to work
(17:51):
reaching out to the four girls, Sam, Nicky, Randy, and Tessa.
We begin with Sam because Sky already has their contact info.
They'd run into each other at their ten year high
school reunion. Sky Sam had said, it's me been the
perfect opportunity to ask about the fuck you on the
(18:12):
garage door, but Sky just couldn't bring herself to mention it,
so instead they made awkward small.
Speaker 4 (18:18):
Talk, and then she fronted me on Facebook, which practically
made me laugh. But I this sounds ridiculous, but I
didn't want to be rude, and so I accepted her friendship.
Speaker 1 (18:34):
I helped Sky write a Facebook message to Sam saying
she has some questions about the end of their friendship,
but with no response, Sky follows up again and again.
Eventually Sam writes back, we just naturally grew apart as
life events progressed, she says. She concludes by saying that
(18:55):
Sky's attempts to contact her are making her feel quote
overwhelmed and stressed, and that makes Sky feel bad. Second
is Nicky, who says that even those guy's mom clearly
remembers her being there that day, She absolutely wasn't. In fact,
(19:18):
she says she and Sky weren't even that close. Third
comes Randy. Randy's hard to get a hold of, so
when we get no answer on her house phone, we
try all the numbers we can find. We leave her
repeated messages, but it seems like she's not even getting them.
But as it turns out, she's gotten all of them,
(19:38):
because she sends Sky an email to say that she's
not happy about it. In fact, she's creeped out. Sky
was at the grocery store when she received the email.
Speaker 4 (19:49):
I was in line and I completely was out of
my body as I was reading it. I so forgot
where I was that someone had to say, are you
in line? And I was like, uh no, I'm not.
And I had to like push my cart away from
the checkout stand because I could not focus.
Speaker 1 (20:12):
Sky went into damage control mode, writing back to Randy
to say how deeply sorry she was. I asked her
to read me what she'd send.
Speaker 4 (20:21):
Randy. I'm so grateful that you wrote me back. It
makes me cringe to think about how semi creepy and
weird it must have seemed to get those messages. I'm
kicking myself for letting that happen. I'm still hoping to
talk to you privately and just explain myself. Would that
be okay?
Speaker 1 (20:40):
Like, you know, is there a kind of like do
you feel like your default is to sort of apologize
for having reached out?
Speaker 5 (20:53):
Yeah?
Speaker 7 (20:54):
I do.
Speaker 4 (20:56):
That has occurred to me.
Speaker 1 (20:59):
Later, Sky shares the email with Clark, and it seems
like it's occurred to him as well.
Speaker 3 (21:05):
I think you were over apologetic if you yourself was
the kind of character was like, oh sorry, sorry, sorry,
I shouldn't.
Speaker 9 (21:13):
Have done that.
Speaker 1 (21:14):
That automatically makes her basically.
Speaker 4 (21:17):
Like gives her power.
Speaker 6 (21:18):
Yeah, it puts her in a better spot than you're in,
and that's bad.
Speaker 1 (21:24):
At Sky's insistence, Randy finally agrees to a phone call,
but in the end, all she tells Sky is that
she doesn't remember that night, doesn't remember any toilet paper
or gras door, She doesn't remember anything at all. Of
the four friends, only one remains, Tessa, the girl Sky's
(21:49):
mom phoned directly after the incident. Over the next couple
of weeks, I speak with Tessa several times. She can't
decide if she wants to talk with Sky for one thing,
she says it was so long ago that she doesn't
remember much, to which I rejoin that she's all we've got.
For another, she adds getting contact like this through a
(22:10):
third party interlocutionary international podcasting host is pretty weird, to
which I admit that it is slightly unconventional. Finally, Tessa
says she doesn't want to inadvertently drag the other girl's
names through the dirt for something they did as kids,
to which I say, well, let's change those names and
(22:30):
draw some pseudonyms through the dirt. And once I agree
to change the names of the four girls, Tessa, not
her real name, agrees to sit down with Sky, still
her real name, so she can finally have a conversation
about the night in question. Both Sky and Tessa live
in California, pretty close to where they grew up. I
(22:52):
figure my presence at their meeting could be calming, helpful.
Even All Sky has to do is invite me out
there to join her. I like California, I know, I
love it, but because of her cursed timidity, Sky just
doesn't have have the lima beans to ask, so I
(23:12):
continue to offer her prompt. I haven't been there in
some time.
Speaker 4 (23:18):
Well, it's a lovely state.
Speaker 1 (23:20):
After several minutes of this elaborate dance, I get to
the point for both our sakes, So does do you
think that you think I should come?
Speaker 4 (23:33):
That would be amazing?
Speaker 1 (23:36):
And so it's off to California A for some long
overdue Q and A Hi. Good, how aut you guys?
Speaker 8 (23:48):
Hi?
Speaker 1 (23:48):
Clark, nice to meet you. Sky picks me up at
the hotel. Clark's along too, to make sure his mom
doesn't lose their nerve.
Speaker 4 (23:56):
Park you can continue to navigate for me.
Speaker 1 (24:00):
Clark sits in the passenger seat, leafing through a comic book.
All right, let me I'm just going to throw this
in here if that's okay, yeah.
Speaker 10 (24:07):
And then.
Speaker 1 (24:09):
Tossed my bag into the back of the hatchback and
we head off to meet Tessa. It felt great to
be in San Francisco. It's just like the Mamas and
the Papa saying, if one is going to San Francisco,
(24:30):
one should wear flowers in one's hair. As we speed
down the highway, I close my eyes, lean back and
would that I had hair enjoy the wind blowing through it.
Speaker 4 (24:45):
Wait, is the trunk open?
Speaker 3 (24:47):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (24:47):
Wow, it seems that in my excitement to hit the
streets of San fran I'd left the hatchback door open,
which it turns out is the source of the San
Franciscan breeze. She whizz, I'm sorry about that.
Speaker 6 (25:03):
God.
Speaker 1 (25:04):
Sky finds a place on the shoulder of the highway
to pull over, oh Man, and shuts the trunk door,
and with that we were back on our way. That's
why they call me mister excitement. Actually, no one calls
(25:24):
me mister excitement. San Francisco is pretty.
Speaker 4 (25:38):
We're not in San Francisco, you know that, right?
Speaker 5 (25:40):
I mean?
Speaker 1 (25:50):
As we drive to meet Tessa, I ask Sky how
she's doing.
Speaker 4 (25:54):
I feel nervous sighted, which is a word that I am.
Speaker 1 (26:01):
When when have you used the word nervous sided, Clark.
Speaker 3 (26:06):
Like before, like baseball games and stuff like that.
Speaker 4 (26:11):
I kind of feel nervecited.
Speaker 1 (26:14):
Nervous sighted is a portmanteau word, like the way say romance,
a word denoting an incestuous relationship between brothers is or chillax,
the act of chilling out with a bar of family
sized x lax.
Speaker 4 (26:31):
How do you feel about meeting Do you want to
meet her? Or will resist temptations to pundry over what
she did.
Speaker 1 (26:39):
Clark is eleven years old. In the comic books he reads,
that's how problems are solved with punches, kung fu chops.
Writing the scales is a simpler business. It's one thing
to hear stories about his mom being stepped on. It's
another to be in the same room with one of
the people who did the stepping. Sky tries to tamp
(26:59):
down his need for revenge.
Speaker 4 (27:01):
Well, as we were talking about last night, before you
went to slay, you won't forgivenoriveness. Forgiveness. We need to
find the forgiveness.
Speaker 1 (27:15):
I wanted a quiet place for Sky and Tessa to talk,
and it turned out that on the weekends, the local
university had an unoccupied studio.
Speaker 4 (27:23):
I think we're basically here.
Speaker 1 (27:25):
We pull into the empty campus parking lot.
Speaker 4 (27:28):
Clark, you want to look and make sure I'm within
the lines?
Speaker 1 (27:30):
Yeah, a lins, Okay, let's get set up. So this
is where Clark and I, well, we'll sit. The studio
is only big enough for Sky and Tessa, So Clark
and I sit in the control booth where we'll be
able to eavesdrop on the conversation. There's a mic. So
(27:54):
should the need arise, Clark and offer guidance that only
Sky can hear through her headphones.
Speaker 4 (27:59):
I'm mom, Hi Clark.
Speaker 1 (28:01):
Okay, so you turn it on.
Speaker 4 (28:02):
It's good to hear your voice.
Speaker 11 (28:04):
Can you hear me?
Speaker 1 (28:05):
Sky? Sandy the studio technician helped let's get set up
and takes a level on Sky's voice by asking her
an easy, neutral question.
Speaker 11 (28:15):
Tell me how's the right in today?
Speaker 4 (28:18):
How is the right in?
Speaker 8 (28:19):
You don't have to shout into it.
Speaker 4 (28:20):
It was easy, except for when we left the hatchback
open on the freeway.
Speaker 1 (28:27):
Laugh it up, Sandy the studio technician, Laugh it up.
Tessa's running late, so Sky sits waiting in the studio
by yourself. Finally, wait, she's here.
Speaker 5 (28:47):
Ah, okay, okay, Hey.
Speaker 1 (29:11):
I'm Jonathan. Made it nice to meet you too. Tessa,
stylish and like Sky, looks younger than her years. You
could still see a trace of the popular girl. I
show her into the studio where Sky's been waiting. The
two haven't seen each other since they were children.
Speaker 4 (29:28):
Who do you do you keep in close touch with?
Anywhere in high school?
Speaker 11 (29:33):
Anyone?
Speaker 1 (29:34):
As they settle in, the mood is formal, a little stilted,
since the room is only about the size of a
small elevator, their knees practically touch you.
Speaker 4 (29:44):
Guys can start now, okay, thanks Clark. Clark says, we
can start.
Speaker 1 (29:47):
Okay.
Speaker 4 (29:49):
So, so I'm just gonna go backtrack a little bit. Yeah,
So my memory is that we were all in sort
of a tight knit group. You know, is it doingly
for me to ask like or this discussion? Why didn't
you do it? Yes, of a good instrum for both
(30:12):
of us, But then had also written fuck you on
the garage door, and that then from that point on,
we never spoke again. And it's something that has always
(30:32):
stuck with me because I don't know why it happened.
And so I guess I'd love to know what your
memories are.
Speaker 1 (30:42):
Clark's got this look on his face, love to know
what your memories are. From his perspective, his mom's doing
what she always does. That is exactly what he told
her not to. She's being overly sensitive to Tessa's feelings.
But even after thirty five years of waiting to ask
the question, Sky just can't help being Sky. Tessa takes
(31:04):
a sip of water.
Speaker 9 (31:06):
Sorry, I'm just my throat is struck.
Speaker 1 (31:09):
Yeah, no problem, Sky smiles warmly and gives Tessa a
moment to collect yourself.
Speaker 4 (31:16):
Take your time.
Speaker 12 (31:20):
So I have a vague recollection.
Speaker 9 (31:25):
It's really really vague.
Speaker 12 (31:29):
What I what really stands out is that we were
just going deeping, like we went teping a lot, you know,
not just on that night, and we literally just stumbled
upon your home.
Speaker 9 (31:45):
And that's what I remember.
Speaker 1 (31:47):
Clark Farros's brow. He wants his mother to push harder,
be more aggressive.
Speaker 3 (31:54):
Ask why you weren't invited to go toilet papering with them?
Speaker 1 (31:58):
And that's a really good question. We watch a sky
waits patiently for Tessa to finish speaking.
Speaker 4 (32:04):
He wanted me to ask you why didn't come with
you that night teeping? Why weren't you invited? Not why
didn't that come? Why I wasn't invited?
Speaker 12 (32:17):
I I in my mind we had drifted apart by then.
Speaker 1 (32:25):
Inside the control room, Clark shakes his head.
Speaker 4 (32:28):
I think there's more to the story, you do.
Speaker 1 (32:30):
Yeah, what makes you think that? He slumps back in
his seat and crosses his arms. He seems frustrated.
Speaker 12 (32:42):
I remember your mom calling my mom, and for my
mom it wasn't a big deal either. My mom, first
of all, didn't even know what teaping was I had
to explain.
Speaker 5 (32:53):
It to her.
Speaker 12 (32:53):
Oh, okay, I did not realize until maybe now that
it was more of a big deal for you.
Speaker 4 (33:03):
Yeah, And I feel like you're being very, very honest,
and I really really appreciate that.
Speaker 1 (33:10):
When Tessa and I last spoke, she'd mentioned how odd
this whole undertaking seemed to her. A woman she hadn't
heard from in thirty five years, wanted to talk to
her about a random night from their childhood. Oh and
she also wanted to bring along her eleven year old
son and his forty eight year old sidekick, both of
whom would be communicating with Sky through a secret microphone.
Speaker 9 (33:32):
Well, can you hear Wait?
Speaker 5 (33:33):
Wait, let's wait so she can talk about.
Speaker 1 (33:35):
Wait wait wait. Inside the control room, I watched Sky
perform a delicate balancing act. She's aware that Clark is watching,
so she's trying not to be too timid, but she
also wants to set a good example for how to
behave and through all that, she can't help seeing it
from Tessa's perspective, how weird and uncomfortable this must be
for her. Sky wants to help Tessa feel safe, and
(33:59):
so she treads lightly.
Speaker 4 (34:03):
I mean, I think being the parent now of a child,
I understand how quickly things can get confused. And it
really was the words that that's what seemed to communicate
to me, I've done something terrible, like I must have it.
I must be responsible for this in some way, you know,
(34:24):
And so I wondered, did I do something?
Speaker 1 (34:29):
You can see that. TESSAs weighing her response. She doesn't
quite know what to say, but with Sky being so
gracious and open, it's like she feels the least she
can do is try to meet her halfway, and so
tentatively she offers a thought.
Speaker 13 (34:45):
Ah, maybe we're a little different than them in what way?
Speaker 4 (35:01):
Again?
Speaker 1 (35:02):
Tessa searches for the right words, all the while, never
seeing us or we, but always they.
Speaker 12 (35:08):
Oh they were like they were a little mischievous, you know.
They were they were a little rebellious and wanting to
do something bad, and I was, and maybe you weren't.
(35:30):
Maybe you didn't want to go along with what they
were doing.
Speaker 4 (35:35):
Well, you know what's interesting about that is the whole
tepeeing thing. I remember that being a thing, but I
remember I actually remember not wanting to do that. Would
you say that that that maybe I was more like
a goodie two shoes.
Speaker 13 (35:56):
Type compared to them.
Speaker 4 (35:58):
Yeah, you know.
Speaker 1 (36:07):
According to Tessa, if Sky stayed friends with those girls,
it would have meant a summer of drinking alcohol and
pulling off semi illegal pranks after dark, all things Sky
wouldn't have wanted. Even back then, she didn't want to
upset anyone. To her friends, that made her seem like
a goody two shoes, And to a goodie two shoes
(36:28):
who thinks they're better than you. What could be more
of a fuck you than a literal fuck you? The
words large and clear emblazoned across her family's garage door.
I turned to Clark to see what he makes of
all this. Is there something that you feel like we're
just kind of missing or we're not getting it? And
(36:48):
I remember really not wanting to beat clarkstairs straight ahead,
watching his mom. I can see he's thinking something through.
He makes a move towards the mic, but then shies away.
He's antsy, rising from his seat, settling back. Eventually, I
make a suggestion, do you just want to go with them?
Speaker 4 (37:09):
Yeah? Totally?
Speaker 1 (37:12):
Clark gets up, leaves the control room and makes his
way to the studio to talk to his mom. In
person watching him, I have no idea what he's up to.
Speaker 4 (37:23):
Oh Clark is here, Oh Clark.
Speaker 1 (37:26):
Enters the room.
Speaker 7 (37:27):
Was that?
Speaker 1 (37:29):
But it's not his Mommy's addressing, it's Tessa. I take
a deep breath as Clark begins to speak.
Speaker 3 (37:37):
Uh, did you feel in any way like dragged into it,
like to do, like to toilet paper people's houses.
Speaker 12 (37:47):
I don't know if I would say dragged, but I
would say definitely I was a follower.
Speaker 1 (37:56):
I'm not exactly surprised by Clark's question. It's the same
one he's been asking since the beginning, essentially, why did
you do this to my mother? But I am surprised
by the way he's asking it, not with him but
with sympathy. For the first time, Clark's trying to see
it all from Tessa's perspective. He's following his mom's example.
Speaker 12 (38:18):
Sometimes you're with friends because those are the ones you have,
So you'll stick with your friends even though you see
things that you don't like in them. You know that
you just don't want to be alone.
Speaker 9 (38:33):
Yeah, thanks, okay, yeah, thanks Claire.
Speaker 1 (38:37):
And because Tessa didn't want to be alone, she continued
to hang out with the girls for several more years
before eventually finding a new group of friends. Tessa turns
the Sky.
Speaker 9 (38:48):
Honey, you freakin dodged a bullet.
Speaker 14 (38:51):
That's what you did with not being with those girls,
I have to say.
Speaker 1 (39:03):
Sky tells Tessa that there's still one thing she's been
wondering about. Why did Tessa agree to talk with her
at all? It would have been easy to say no,
everyone else did well.
Speaker 12 (39:13):
I said, yeah, yeah, truthfully, the call was so out
of the blue, of course, I you know, at the beginning,
I said, yeah, sure, you know, like and then I
talked to my daughter and she was like, no, like,
don't do that.
Speaker 4 (39:31):
How old is your daughter?
Speaker 9 (39:32):
My daughter is almost thirteen? Okay, yeah.
Speaker 4 (39:36):
What was she worried about?
Speaker 9 (39:38):
She's she kind of said, like, what's in it for you?
Speaker 8 (39:41):
Mm hm?
Speaker 12 (39:42):
You know, she was kind of worried that, like I
would come out as a bad person or something.
Speaker 4 (39:48):
How is she feeling right now that you're here?
Speaker 9 (39:50):
She's mad?
Speaker 12 (39:52):
She is, Yeah, she's mad, But you know I told her, like,
not everything we do in life is for us, it's
for other people as well, So she'll be fine.
Speaker 1 (40:02):
Whereas Guy set out to show her Sun that she
has the courage to stand up for her own needs.
Tessa wants to show her that she has the courage
to stand up for someone else's.
Speaker 9 (40:17):
I'm sorry that I didn't.
Speaker 12 (40:20):
The thought of you thinking for thirty five years that
you had done something wrong is like, ugh, I really
don't think that you did anything.
Speaker 9 (40:35):
I really don't.
Speaker 12 (40:36):
I'm sorry that you felt like that, you know, I
wish that you hadn't.
Speaker 4 (40:41):
I'm so glad. I'm hearing it now.
Speaker 9 (40:43):
I'm glad too.
Speaker 12 (40:45):
So I'm really glad, And it's really good to see you.
And you literally look exactly the same. Your hair is
a little shorter, right.
Speaker 1 (41:00):
Michael, do you go ahead?
Speaker 4 (41:04):
Was that dramatic hug? Oh, you want a dramatic hug.
That's glad. I think we have to have the dramatic hug.
Speaker 1 (41:13):
Because the room's so small. When they stand, they're already
almost touching. They look at each other for a brief moment,
and then Sky opens her wings.
Speaker 4 (41:25):
Oh to see so good to see you.
Speaker 1 (41:37):
After the meeting with Tessa, Clark didn't have much to say,
but at night, back in his room, in that space
where he feels free to open up, Clark's eager to
talk about Tessa.
Speaker 6 (41:50):
Honestly, I didn't know that person, so I thought they
might like still be the boy still bullying you. And
I didn't want you to feel like scared or anything
in that situation, so I was kind of anxious. Well
then I met Tessa and she was like super nice.
Speaker 5 (42:09):
She was nice, and.
Speaker 6 (42:14):
I feel like you'd like you weren't, tim and Mommy,
you were brave, Mommy.
Speaker 1 (42:24):
Tonight there's no talk of avenging. Through his mom's example,
Clark's learning that one can be kind without being timid.
The kindness can carry its own strength.
Speaker 4 (42:36):
If you had if he hadn't had that night where
you had said you have to figure this out, Mom,
I really honestly don't think I would have done it.
So thank you.
Speaker 6 (42:47):
You're welcome.
Speaker 1 (42:53):
There's a lot more coming for Clark, moments when he'll
have to make difficult decisions. Some of them he'll talk
about with Sky and some he won't. But for now
they keep talking, neither of them quite ready to go
to sleep just yet.
Speaker 4 (43:10):
Remember when you said that there was an international tomato day,
Stop hugging me, it was international.
Speaker 11 (43:56):
Now that the furnitures returning to its goodwill home, Now
that the last.
Speaker 7 (44:06):
Month's rent is ski mean, with the damage to the bottom,
take this moment to do so if we meant it,
if we from things that accidentally?
Speaker 1 (44:29):
Hello, Hi, Hi, how are you?
Speaker 4 (44:33):
You guys can't see me.
Speaker 1 (44:34):
It looks like, yeah, are we doing this with the
cameras off?
Speaker 4 (44:37):
There? I think I just clicked there you are?
Speaker 1 (44:40):
Hello? You know, as I was waiting for you to
pop up. You know what word entered my mind?
Speaker 4 (44:47):
What word is that?
Speaker 1 (44:48):
Nervous? Sighted?
Speaker 4 (44:50):
Oh my gosh, Jonathan nervous? I still use that word,
do you really? I mean I use it regularly. I
mean I feel like it should be an actual word.
Speaker 1 (45:00):
Yeah, totally. It's Uh, it's the perfect portmanteau. I feel like. Also,
it's come up recently for me, as it does occasionally,
and I think of I think of you, I think
of Clark.
Speaker 4 (45:12):
Yeah that's great.
Speaker 1 (45:13):
So let me ask you some real meat and potato
questions here.
Speaker 4 (45:18):
All right, bring it on.
Speaker 1 (45:20):
So did you ever hear from Tessa or the other
girls after the episode came out?
Speaker 4 (45:26):
I never heard from any of the other girls. And
then Tessa and I kept in touch for a little while,
and I actually, when I knew that we were going
to be having this conversation. I reached out to her
and I told her that I was going to be
talking to you, and what I wanted to know mostly
(45:49):
from her was how her daughter felt about it. Now.
Oh and actually she texted me, Should I read you
what she wrote?
Speaker 2 (45:57):
Sure?
Speaker 4 (45:58):
Yeah, okay, okay, So here's what she said. We did
go back and listen to the podcast together. She's referring
to her daughter. She did not remember being mad at me,
and she said she was thankful and happy that I
took part in that. Seven years makes a huge difference.
She also said, middle school sucks.
Speaker 1 (46:19):
Oh man, wow, it really does go full circle.
Speaker 4 (46:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (46:23):
And speaking of which, so back then Clark was eleven,
so that would mean that he's what eighteen.
Speaker 4 (46:30):
Now he's nineteen, actually eighteen. Yeah, it's not that insane,
it's insane. He's a freshman in college.
Speaker 1 (46:38):
Wow, So what is he studying.
Speaker 4 (46:41):
He's studying political science.
Speaker 1 (46:43):
That seems to make sense. I mean, even from just
what I knew of him at the age of eleven. Yeah,
like standing up for himself, standing up standing up for
the little guy.
Speaker 4 (46:52):
Yeah, like standing up for the little guy, and sort
of also like this sense of like justice must be served.
Speaker 1 (47:00):
You would hoped that that Clark would learn from the
episode's mission, like basically, you wanted to show how to
stand up for yourself, but to do so with kindness.
And do you feel like he took those lessons with
him through the rest of middle school in high school.
Speaker 4 (47:18):
Okay, let me be perfectly honest with you, Jonathan. Yeah,
he was really grateful, just like I am. I think
he felt fondness for Tessa for showing up. Yeah, but
I do have to also tell you, yea, as far
as the other three girls who didn't show up go,
(47:40):
he's still really mad at them.
Speaker 7 (47:42):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (47:43):
He feels like they didn't take accountability for what happened,
and that's really still frustrating to him. So I you know,
I sort of at first when he said to me,
you know, I'm still mad at those girls, there was
a part of me that felt disappointed because like, I
don't feel that way.
Speaker 1 (48:05):
Yeah, you didn't feel that way even afterwards?
Speaker 4 (48:07):
No, immediately, Yeah, I really didn't. I mean, I think
the warm feelings, the sense of fondness that I developed
for Tessa during our conversation like really eclipsed these old
painful feelings that I had had. And also in the meantime,
I've raised two teenagers too, right, and maybe you know,
(48:29):
I don't know if Clark will have children, but if
he does have children, like, maybe then his perspective on
how he feels about the girls who didn't show up,
maybe it will change then, Like we're always evolving, We're
always changing, and you know, I can't argue with him
about his feelings. His feelings are valid, and I want
to respect the way that he feels about it, and
(48:50):
so I feel great about how things have evolved since then. Good.
Speaker 1 (48:57):
Well, you know, if if Clark was so inclined, it
would be really cool if he wanted to send a
voice message to saying, Hi.
Speaker 4 (49:06):
Oh my gosh, she sounds so different. Yeah, I'll ask him,
ask him.
Speaker 10 (49:15):
Hey, guys, it's Clark. I think it's really cool that
you guys are doing this episode to revisit the podcast
we did all those years ago. That's a really cool
memory for me that I really cherish, you know, kind
of helping my mom get closure about a story that
she used to tell me when I was growing up.
Before we even thought of trying to write in and
see if people would be interested in listening to it,
(49:39):
I'm off in college.
Speaker 1 (49:40):
Now.
Speaker 10 (49:40):
It's been quite a while, but I'd just like to
thank everyone was involved. It was a really great time,
great experience, and I'm glad to have had it.
Speaker 1 (49:56):
To piggyback off of Clark's words, spoken in a surprisingly
bass baritone, I'd like to thank everyone who helped put
the episode together, and we'll be back once again with
another exciting update in two weeks. But before then, might
I direct your attention to our free newsletter. Maybe you've
(50:17):
heard about it, maybe you haven't. If you have not,
please sign up at patreon dot com. Slash Heavyweight