Overconfident - 995

On this episode of The Thought Shower, Intern John breaks down why he runs himself in the ground. Plus, overconfident men make these mistakes in relationships

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Episode Transcript

(00:00):
And a happy Wednesday friends. Welcometo the Thought Shower. Intern John is
my name today? Not starting offideal. Forgot my laptop at home,
which is, you know, notthe vibe you want when it comes to
work and that type of thing,but it is what it is. You
know, I left my laptop out. I was trying to be like very

(00:24):
proactive, like, wanta what,I'll charge it overnight that way I get
to work. It's good to go. And I realized the second I walked
in the studio, I go,hmm, I bet you I forgot my
laptop. Sure shooting, sure shooting. I think the problem is I'm still

(00:45):
kind of recovering from being sick forbasically the last week. Like Monday after
the show, I took like afive hour nap, one of those things
where I was just so drained,like I probably shouldn't have come to work.
I mean, honestly, I wasgoing to cancel this if it was
any other event this week, andI will canceled. But because it was
three sold out shows, I'm like, now, yeah, I do it.

(01:07):
I almost canceled coming to work onMonday, but I was like,
ah, I'll be fine. SoMonday after the show. I was so
drained. I was like, youwant to know what, I'm just gonna
lay down and see how long Ican sleep for. To me, those
are the best naps. When Ihave a nap where I put an alarm
on, my anxiety kind of runswhile where it's like, I bet you

(01:27):
I have twenty nine minutes left.Now bet you it's twenty seven. So
I just did like the no alarmraw dog in a nap, woke up
four hours later. I was like, oh God, like I guess I
needed that, you know what Imean. And then so yesterday maybe took
like an hour nap. And Ithink it's because, like I have a
tendency to run myself into the ground. I just kind of I do it

(01:52):
my therapist once. I do itto distract myself from other things, you
know, which probably true, Isuppose, because like right now, the
big focus is the morning show.Obviously, I would say the podcast makes
sense, that would say comedy makessense. Sure, as comedy ends.

(02:14):
By the way, the last showAugust seventeenth, Ram said live in Baltimore
tickets Internsjncomedy dot com, as thecomedy ends, and that's taking one thing
off the plate hockey's gonna start,coaching is gonna start there we go.
Plus I'm involved with a new restaurantgroup and we're opening up, Like the

(02:34):
Baltimore's show is August seventeenth, Oursoft launch opening is August twenty first.
So you know, it's just oneof those things. It's funny. I
think sometimes people think I'm not tryingto humble bragg about being busy, But
I think sometimes people think I'm lyingabout how busy I am on certain things,

(02:57):
and then I lay out the scheduleand it's like, oh, not
great. It's a long way ofsaying that, like I'm starting to get
back to humans, starting to feelkind of back normal, starting to feel
a little bit good, but stillnot to the point where I last night
was like I should prepare for theday tomorrow by putting myself away, you
know, getting my protein shake readyfor the gym. Guy went to the

(03:20):
gym for the first time in aweek. Oh not great, not great,
friends, not great. But Imean, I guess like I'm trying
to get better at the gym froma sense of like I ain't know,
just giving myself grace. But Iused to go and be like really hard
myself at the gym, and thenit was kind of like, hey,
you know, I'm not training fora sport, Like I'm not letting anybody

(03:46):
down if I don't, you know, grow the reps or grow the weight
by any certain amount. Like it'sokay, just go to the gym to
be healthier, you know what Imean. I think they kind of changed
the outlook. I am down forthirty pounds this year, pretty exciting,
but that way, it's like,you know, even a couple months ago,
I've been very upset with myself forlike the gym session yesterday, but

(04:11):
I was kind of like, yeah, you know, you've been sick for
a week, you haven't lifted fora week, and it's not like most
people probably can't tell. You know, nobody's looking at me like, I
bet his bench went down, youknow what I mean. So we're good,
we're rolling, we're good. Bigthings coming, man, I mean
obviously the comedy show August seventeenth.I believe my parents are coming because they

(04:34):
want to come to the restaurant whenit's opened. So that's exciting, a
lot of exciting things going on.I'll have more than that a little bit
later on, but August seventeenth,Ram said Internjunkcomedy dot com. Let me
get to this for your Wednesday.Men who are overly confident make these relationship
mistakes. Now, am I overlyconfident? I don't know. I think

(04:59):
I'm fairly confident myself. The analogyI always use is if Capital One Arena,
which seats eighteen thousand, came tome and said we want you to
sell out your comedy show here,you know, in November, I firmly
believe I could do it one hundredpercent. That being said, I don't
think is a simple case of meannouncing on Instagram in October and the show

(05:24):
sells out. I don't think that'sthe case at all. I think they
have a really good team around me, with the comedians Kyle and d certainly,
and then with our media folks andwith the show that we could grind
it out and we could find folksto help out and make it happen.
So I'm confident in that sense oflike my own drive, but also the
people around me, if that makessense. Number One. The list though

(05:46):
they come across as know it allsYeah, they say everybody on a date
where somebody has an opinion, everythingfrom the best wine to existential questions,
they got all the answers. Yeah, that's annoying. I think on I'm
pretty good, though, you know, not to toot my own horn.
I'm a pretty good interviewer, soon dates, I think I'm pretty good

(06:06):
at listening. That's kind of likemy vibe. They control all the decision
making. They say, ever beensteamrolled in the decision because mister confidence thought
it was best. These guys oftenmistake of partnership for dictatorship, making decisions
without consultation. Yeah, that'd beannoying because then it's like not a relationship,

(06:30):
and the kind if they said,it's like they're you're just kind of
their boss barking orders. That tome is not even fun. I get
like a decision fatigue from like workstuff. So it's nice when somebody knows
what they want to eat, knowswhere they want to go, knows what
they want to do. That tome is kind of a relief, because
I don't think anybody wants to makedecisions all time. They avoid apologies.

(07:00):
Heard me talk about this on thispodcast several times. I think apologizing,
first of all, it's fairly easyto do, but also it's the right
thing to do, and I thinkit just kind of shows maturity. Apologizing's
weird because it gets to a pointwhere it becomes blatantly obvious somebody is not
strong enough to apologize, and thatto me is I mean, it's a

(07:23):
sign of weakness. You know.I think you're trying to go the other
way where it's like I'm not gonnabe weak, but not apologizing to me
a sign of weakness. If theyseek compliments from all directions, well,
you know, they seek validation fortheir confidence by fishing for compliments. It's
like they need a constant supply ofyou're amazing to keep their confidence tank full.

(07:45):
Yeah, I don't think. Imean, I'm gonna be honest.
Sometimes I follow this trap a littlebit, but I think it's more so
like I just want my hard workto be noticed, you know what I
mean. And that's one of thosethings I've talked about this before. It's
like when you get yourself in aposition of leadership, ye, you know,
you rarely get compliments, Like Irarely get complimented for my work ethic

(08:07):
because at this point, it's likethat's what I'm supposed to do. You
know what I mean it is.Don't get me wrong. I'm supposed to
be the first one here every moore. I'm supposed to be the first one
here. It's not like a Ishould be complimented. So that's kind of
like the thing you deal with whereit's like it's nice to get compliments,
but I think it becomes like you'reexpected to. Yeah, they hog the

(08:30):
spotlight, say some men are soberconfident they constantly seek attention, hog the
spotlight in any social situation. Uh, not your boy. I like to
share the spotlight. Contrary to popularbelief, I get extremely awkward in spotlight.
That's not like set up, Likeif we're at the comedy show,

(08:50):
I'm in the spotlight. I cando that because that's a set spotlight.
If it's not that, I canget a little bit hockey, you know
what I mean, a little bitoff. If they're constantly comparing the relationship,
this is the last one. Overconfidentmen compare the relationship to others,
assuming there should be just as perfect. It's to say it's an unrealistic benchmark,

(09:11):
create unnecessary pressure and disappointment. Yeah, that's a tough one. I
also think too, it's like thattrap of like comparing relationship I've had a
deal with with next girlfriend would comparerelationship to like high school, and I
was like, hey, we're notin high school anymore, you know what
I mean, Like you gotta dealwith real world problems. On high school,

(09:35):
you relatively sheltered compared to now,right, like things are taking care
of for you. That kind ofstress of like paying bills, making your
appointments, going to work, thatwasn't there, so you really could just
kind of focus on the relationship.But now it's like, it's not an
unfair comparison. Now we got wegot real life, baby, real life

(09:56):
not fun. Hopefully we see inBaltimore, August seventeenth, Internshooncomedy dot Com.
Have a fantastic Wednesday. I'll seeyou Friday.