The Worst Thing To Be Called - The Radio Show (November 22)

Today on the Hauraki Breakfast, the guys discussed the banana that was duct taped to a wall and called art, and what should be New Zealand 2024 word of the year?

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
The Hidache break for show, whatever you need for your
next job. Bunning's trade is ready to help.

Speaker 2 (00:05):
Use entertainment, sports and needs that there are available everywhere
on the Hurt Radio app, Journey Wells on Radio HDI,
Good Money.

Speaker 1 (00:15):
Walking Along to the Hurdache, Breakfast's Friday the twenty second
and November twenty twenty four, Too Little Ducks twenty two,
Guess who's back? And my mother house? What a fat
will your mother mouth? It's Meshy, morning, Meshy.

Speaker 3 (00:30):
Have you've always still been doing this?

Speaker 4 (00:31):
Have you?

Speaker 3 (00:32):
If you've keep on playing through us have been gone?

Speaker 1 (00:34):
Oh? Mate, we have been plowing through with a plumb.

Speaker 3 (00:37):
Really when you say with a plum, what does that mean?

Speaker 1 (00:39):
Oh? Things have been going so well? Man, it breaks
my heart. Things will be going so well in here,
bro okay, and how are you ready? All right? Yeah?

Speaker 5 (00:47):
Well, don't ever let anyone say that your job's easy, Meshy,
because you're pressing the buttons for the last few days
and having to laugh and talk a.

Speaker 1 (00:55):
Little bit every now and again. Gee.

Speaker 5 (00:57):
That really started texting me probably late yesterday. I really
started feeling I didn't know if I'd make it today.

Speaker 3 (01:03):
Okay, Well, I'm glad that everyone's doing okay and that
the show did go on without me.

Speaker 1 (01:07):
I was worried.

Speaker 3 (01:07):
I was sitting there at homeworking. Look, you guys must
be stuffed.

Speaker 1 (01:10):
But no, they're just going off mate. I was gone
after how mate, good they breakfast? A Radio Darky executive
producer yesterday went to the Cult who played at Victor.

Speaker 5 (01:23):
Yeah, the old Sparkerna. That's where we went last night.
A group of us from Radio Hurdacky Preebs was there
and he was there Mass.

Speaker 1 (01:32):
You were supposed to come, but you were not very well.

Speaker 3 (01:34):
Yeah crooks a dog. Crook is a dog.

Speaker 1 (01:37):
But I am jealous. Yeah, no, Look, it was pretty good.

Speaker 5 (01:42):
Kate Britain, our marketing manager, described it as Captain Jack
Sparrow really going off up on stage there in Esbury,
the lead singer of the Cult, doing very well for
sixty two jeep as Creepers. He absolutely commanded the stage.
One thing that did concern one of the public that long, though,
I went to the bathrooms and there was this guy.

(02:02):
He was in like a leather waistcoat so no sleeves,
and he was walking around yelling to the security staff.

Speaker 1 (02:10):
He said, why didn't they play some more familiar songs.

Speaker 5 (02:14):
And you know what, I don't want to watch an
old guy dancing around in address.

Speaker 1 (02:20):
Okay, well all right, so why was he yelling that
what are the security stuff going to do? We are
we going to get a message up to in Esbury?
What's going to happen?

Speaker 3 (02:27):
Why are we focusing on this guy? I feel like
maybe the concert itself could be more What.

Speaker 1 (02:31):
Did they start with? Ruder?

Speaker 5 (02:33):
Well, they started with a song called Rise, which I
think is off the album two thousand and one Beyond
Good and Evil.

Speaker 1 (02:39):
I think nobody really cute about that too.

Speaker 5 (02:41):
Yeah, yep, but just just going through because I did,
you know, as I like to do, I ran the numbers.
I ran the numbers and there was one, three, four, five, six, seven, eight,
nine different albums that they did songs off. Okay, probably
the moment of the night was when they did when
they did Wildflower, which was second, and he was like,

(03:03):
well I can see you know that one, don't Yeah?

Speaker 1 (03:05):
Tune though. Yeah.

Speaker 5 (03:07):
It was a weird, weird concert though, probably for them
because you know, it's the cult. They've been around for
forty years and they would have played to so many people,
just absolutely going nuts. And here they are at spak
Arena in Auckland and it's a seated venue.

Speaker 1 (03:20):
Okay, yeah, so was everybody seated, even up the front,
right up the front they were seated. Were they up
dancing in the aisle.

Speaker 5 (03:28):
It didn't take long before the wave of people standing
up happened. But I've got to say, though, for in
Asbury sixty two, I think he's.

Speaker 1 (03:36):
Doing very well for sixty two, really good, doing very
well for sixty two. It is just what you want
to hear, really good. And no it's funny because how
old can you be doing it sixty two? I feel like,
mate sixty two, I'm I'm just around the corner from
sixty sixty two. Well, there's my point. It's not that old.

Speaker 6 (03:53):
I don't feel like you have to say doing well
for sixty.

Speaker 1 (03:56):
Two sixty two. It's not like a review for a concert.
So far you can't sixty two review has been Yeah,
your review has been there's a guy in a leather
vest wandering around in the background. They play some more
familiar songs and also I'm not here to watch a
guy in a dress yelling at the security. The other
thing was that was seated. The other bart is that
they played off a whole heap of albums and Ian Asbury,

(04:18):
the front man for the Coult is doing very well
for sixty two.

Speaker 5 (04:22):
Yeah, great voice for sixty two. In fact, they did
do this song. It was broken down into a nice
acoustic version of this song last night.

Speaker 7 (04:30):
The Hot Acky Breakfast with Jeremy Wells alreadyo.

Speaker 1 (04:33):
Hodaki Let's at played last night and Auckland executive producer
Ruder when Long said that Ian Esbury was particularly good
for sixty two sixty two, but according to the guy
in the leather vest, and they could have played a
few more songs than everybody knew. And also he's not
really interested in watching a guy wearing a dress.

Speaker 5 (04:54):
No, but he wasn't wearing a dress in Esbury, was he? Well,
I think the phrase was dancing around in a dress.
Also quite interesting. Early on they had someone come out
and just wave wave what I thought was some kind
of smoke or incense around. Someone said they're burning sage
at the front of the stage. They burned sage all around.
We're in Ashbury sings and around the speakers.

Speaker 1 (05:13):
They are the cult. Oh maybe that was it.

Speaker 5 (05:16):
That's quite an interesting idea. Have they always done that
the Cult. I'm unsure, but I feel like every morning
just w U s it mash. Maybe we could wave
some sage around just to cleanse, cleanse the environment that
you sit in.

Speaker 3 (05:28):
You didn't happen to see the cole last night, did you.
We've had a text here from a lovly Nicole. The
Cult were awesome. She says, time traveled back to my twenties.

Speaker 1 (05:36):
Oh, Nicole, Nicole, I would have paid.

Speaker 3 (05:39):
Money just to time travel back to her twenties.

Speaker 1 (05:43):
How was she?

Speaker 3 (05:43):
Was she having a good time.

Speaker 5 (05:44):
I'm not sure if it's Nicole the time traveler or
Nicole the seventy two year who was doing well for
seventy two.

Speaker 1 (05:51):
Okay, right, I'm not sure which one it is. Here's
a review here, morning boys, I went to the Cult
and christ Church can confirm Asbury still has the pipes
and he still has the chops. Pipes and chops, pipes
and chops. That's what it's all about. Well, and if
that lever vest twat, yes, yeah, it sounds like the
leather vest twat. He's getting a bit of heat on

(06:14):
the text machine.

Speaker 3 (06:15):
At the same time, though, that reviewer that texture agent
work three two no review.

Speaker 1 (06:20):
Yeah, I thought that was good. You think it was
better than mine? I think so. Pipes and chops, Pipes
and chops, Pipes and chops.

Speaker 7 (06:26):
If the guy on the best Yeah, the Hurdacky Breakfast
with Jeremy Wells a radio.

Speaker 1 (06:32):
So we talked about this the other day. The artist,
the Italian artist Marie your Catlan, he displayed a yellow
banana and it was duct taped to a wall and
it was auctioned at Southby's. It was going to be
auctioned and they thought it was going to go for
between one point seven and two point five million dollars.
This is this is the banana adducted to a wall.

Speaker 3 (06:53):
I wasn't here when you guys discussed this. Was it
just some kind of I don't know, why do people
do things like this is some kind of statement towards art,
being like, you know what, it's simple, this is all
it is here. Let me just ductate this banana, so
this piece of canvas and the where we go.

Speaker 1 (07:07):
Well, it's called comedian, So I think it's meant to
be funny. You know, banana slipping on a banana skin,
don't it's people are prepared to pay heaps and heaps
of money for a banana duct tape to a wall.
Ha ha ha, look at you? What an idiot? Right?
I think that's the vibe.

Speaker 3 (07:23):
Okay, So what does it sell for.

Speaker 1 (07:25):
Ten point five million?

Speaker 3 (07:26):
Holy?

Speaker 1 (07:27):
So, I thought it was going to be one point
seven to two point five itself a ten point five
million and the most interesting part of the whole thing.
You have to replace the banana. Yeah, so the banana
it obviously decomposes because it's a banana, it's a real banana.
Freeze it, mate, Yeah, but even their mate, it's going
to go brown.

Speaker 3 (07:45):
But that's okay. I think you just take the brownness. Yeah,
leave it in some kind of freezer. Okay, you don't
have to replace the banana. And that's with the Edmund
saved there, I think.

Speaker 1 (07:53):
But it's not going to be on the war mate,
unless you're unless you're living in a freezer.

Speaker 3 (07:57):
May what kind of paenis is hanging a banana taped
for canvas in the living room? Anyway?

Speaker 1 (08:02):
I think that is. I don't even think it's on
a canvas. No, it's not. It's just dictated.

Speaker 5 (08:05):
Well, what if though, you put it in the freezer
and someone comes along and they accidentally put it in
a smoothie and that's a ten point five million dollar smoothie.

Speaker 3 (08:13):
Yeah, that's just the way it goes though. But is
the value of fixed to the banana? What's the value
affixed to That's what I understand there.

Speaker 5 (08:19):
So what you get the guy that won the auction,
he gets his own banana, so not one of the
ones that have been exhibited over the last five years.

Speaker 1 (08:26):
That you also get a roll of duct tape.

Speaker 3 (08:28):
You get a full roll of duct tape with ten
million dollars.

Speaker 5 (08:31):
You also get a certificate of authenticity, and just for
people like yourself, Mash, you get instructions on how to
install the work.

Speaker 3 (08:38):
Okay, that's fantastic, But what happens to my certificate of authenticity?
Once my banana browns out and I have to replace it.

Speaker 1 (08:44):
It still exists because it's still you bought the thing.
I mean, who is the muppet who bought this? You
might be asking, Yeah, that is what I'm asking. It
was justin Sun and he bit over the phone, and
he is a Chinese cryptocurrency dude, is a crypto crypto bro,
and he founded the platform Tron, the cryptocurrency platform Tron,

(09:08):
and he bent over the phone and he used gives
what he used to pay for it some kind of
n FT crypto crypto crypto. So he's made heaps from
heaps of imaginary money from trading imaginary money, and he's
used imaginary money to buy some stupid banana with a certificate.
What him up?

Speaker 5 (09:28):
But in the he does say though in the coming days,
I will personally eat the banana as part of this
unique artistic experience honoring its place in both astory and
pop culture.

Speaker 1 (09:38):
Do you give the two point five million to charity
for goodness sake? Like give the ten point five million
given to give it to someone that's going to use
it for good You know.

Speaker 3 (09:46):
What he should do that banana and shove uppers, shoven
up his ass.

Speaker 1 (09:51):
That's what you're saying. Where the sun don't shine, Use entertainment,
sports and.

Speaker 7 (09:57):
Everywhere on the.

Speaker 1 (10:00):
On Radio six thirty one on the Hidercky Breakfast Time
for your latest news headlines. Security guard has serious injuries
after being stabbed in the neck in Auckland's New Market.
A twenty four year old will appear in court today
facing a charge of aggravated wounding. Ukraine's military has accused
Russia of launching an intercontinental ballistic missile in an attack

(10:21):
on one of its cities. However, two Western officials say
it was a ballistic missile but not a ICBM. Is
there rules, Yeah, there are. Weirdly that it's because Russia say,
if you launch these things which have been clearly given
to you by NATO and America, then that's escalating the

(10:42):
war because that's bringing foreignersm to what they've decided to
make the rules around what you can and can't do
in the own war that they've started.

Speaker 4 (10:48):
Interesting, I didn't think there were any rules. I think
we just go for it.

Speaker 1 (10:52):
I think they're just really scared that there will be
other people joining the war and that won't be great
for Russia because at this stage their ally is North Korea. Funny,
and Ethan de Groot has been named. There's a great
story around the North Koreans. Have you heard about what
they're up to the North Korean soldiers because the first
time they've ever had five g on. That's what they're doing,

(11:14):
blue shocking.

Speaker 4 (11:16):
Apparently on the front line, just sending shots over.

Speaker 1 (11:19):
The ransacking their own dignitat Yeah, no one's business. And
Ethan de Groot has been named to start for the
All Blacks against Italy and to writ his first game
time of the end of year tour. Lucid prop stood
down for the England Test for failing to meet team
standards then overlooked for the Island and France fakes.

Speaker 4 (11:37):
Just you never found out, did we?

Speaker 3 (11:38):
But what he did?

Speaker 1 (11:39):
I've heard something?

Speaker 4 (11:40):
I heard he was strangling ducks in a public park,
did you.

Speaker 1 (11:44):
Yeah? Okay, I heard he lost his wallet somewhere and
had to go back to get it from somewhere in
Tokyo and missed the team perfew.

Speaker 4 (11:54):
Easy place to get lost, Tokyo.

Speaker 1 (11:56):
Yeah, Well he never's find and never's wallet doesn't speak
to you. Oh godlie, that's good.

Speaker 7 (12:02):
The Hurray breakfast already.

Speaker 1 (12:04):
H a sec here that Gilane joins us in the
studio this morning.

Speaker 4 (12:08):
Morning.

Speaker 1 (12:09):
And I'm sure you'd be interested to know about this
banana that's sold at for ten point five million dollars
at auction, souther Bee's. It's it's by an artist called
Maurizio Catlan. A yellow banana affixed to a wall with
a piece of silver duct tape. Yep, it's not even
the original banana that was actually displayed by Mauricio Catalan.

Speaker 4 (12:34):
Just the concept of it, isn't it.

Speaker 1 (12:35):
Yeah? Really, it's a concept that South Beet sort was
going to go for one point seven and two point
five million, which I still think is still a lot.
But absolute crypto wounder from China.

Speaker 4 (12:47):
Is he paid in bitcoin?

Speaker 1 (12:48):
He's but he's paid in crypto.

Speaker 4 (12:49):
Oh okay, there you go. That explains it.

Speaker 1 (12:51):
Well that's not real money, is it.

Speaker 4 (12:52):
Nah, that's monopoly money.

Speaker 1 (12:54):
We all know that. Yep. Yeah. So but you've had
a bit of a you've had a history of bananas yourself.

Speaker 4 (13:01):
Well, look I was looking at this, I read about it,
and I mean, obviously, Mariice York Catalan, he must be
a famous artist of some descriptions, so it must be
sort of valuable. It's not just some muppet that's come
off the street and taped a banana to a wall.
He must be known for his abstract art. Because my
incident with a banana, I'm not sure the banana is
going to be worth so much. And that was, you know,
back in the early days of the alternative commentary collective.

(13:22):
We're just freshly been thrown out of the Cricket World Cup.
We had a chip on our shoulder, and a potential
sponsor came to us. A fast food sponsor came to
us and sent us a whole lot of free frozen
bananas covered and chocolate were popping candy on.

Speaker 1 (13:37):
Top of that were delicious.

Speaker 4 (13:38):
Yeah yeah, And they said, hey, really, Keen, here's some
free stuff. Would you mind giving us some free publicity.
You know, it'd be great if you could do a
post or something, just have fun with it. So I
removed my pants and bent over and Matt Heath and
serted it into my backside. We took a photo, put
it on social media.

Speaker 1 (13:57):
Yeah, I took the photo. Yeah, I was there in
the offices of vinzid Me, wasn't he Wellington and Wellington?
And yeah. I remember you saying I've got an idea
for this, and I say it okay, and they said
if you got your camera, I said yep. And then
you said you immediately pulled downy pants. You said to
Heath could you shove this? Andre? And and Jerry do
you want to take a photo of it? And I

(14:17):
said yep, sure, And and there I was. I was there.
I snapped the photo. I can still see it in
my mind's eye, and I remember the photo. The photo
has materialized again.

Speaker 4 (14:28):
It's in our book. It's on the back page of
the a SEC Almanac. I don't know how it got
in there. I thought it disappeared. But Matt Heath he
has it on his phone every time I call him,
So every time I call him, it pops up. Me
me bent over, straight back. I must be a very
straight back like Olo Brown. You can eat dinner off
there and and there's a smile on my face with

(14:48):
the thumbs up, and an even bigger smile on Matt
Heath's face as he's looking and said that I'm not
sure that banana is worth ten million.

Speaker 1 (14:55):
You guys look so happy to performing that act. That
so happy.

Speaker 4 (15:01):
Let's just say how Pizza didn't sponsor us.

Speaker 1 (15:05):
The client was not happy with that particular integration. This
is the Hurdarchy Breakfast.

Speaker 7 (15:11):
The Hurdarchy Breakfast with Jeremy Wells on Radio Hodarchy.

Speaker 1 (15:14):
Time for the history of Yesterday Today with Jeremy James
Drummond Wells Friday. So we're going with the drummer base.
Oh yeah, get you ready for the weekend. On this
day in nineteen sixty three, US President John f Kennedy
is assassinated. This is a little bit too upbeat for that.
By Lee Harvey Oswald while writing in an open topped

(15:37):
Medicaide and Dallastic.

Speaker 8 (15:38):
It's the kind of Dallas, Texas the flash apparently official
President Kennedy died at one pm Central Standard time two
o'clock Eastern Standard time, some thirty eight minutes ago.

Speaker 4 (15:53):
It's the kind of music Lee Hayoza would be listening to, though.
Is he sitting in the book depositoring?

Speaker 1 (15:57):
And I thought he was more of a kind of
the sort of music here.

Speaker 4 (16:05):
It's not going to be first to blow some head.

Speaker 1 (16:08):
On this day in ninety sixty eight, the first interracial
TV kiss, Yeah, Captain Kirk and Hoorah would see you,
and I.

Speaker 7 (16:19):
Would hear your voice from all parts of the ship.

Speaker 2 (16:23):
My fierce would fade, but.

Speaker 7 (16:29):
I'm not afraid.

Speaker 4 (16:32):
The first interracial kiss was Diddy kept cap'n Kirk.

Speaker 1 (16:38):
That's Captain Kirk, always pesting.

Speaker 4 (16:40):
Around anything, anything, anything he would.

Speaker 1 (16:43):
Imuman and that should have been the first into species
TV kiss.

Speaker 4 (16:48):
Yeah, because of her. I don't know where Hooah came from,
some sort of different planet.

Speaker 1 (16:53):
Another planet. Yeah, it was just constantly trying to get
his DNA out into other planets.

Speaker 4 (16:58):
He was a tough hog to keep in the head.

Speaker 1 (17:00):
He was a nineteen ninety five toy story, the first
feature length film credited completely using computer generated imagery, starring
Tom Hanks and Tim Allen, was released. Yeah. Nineteen ninety seven,
Michael Hutchins took his own life, aged thirty seven. He
was found dead in his room at the Ritz Carlton
Hotel in Double Bay in Sydney. Who was a death

(17:22):
recorded as suicide by hangings still controversial.

Speaker 4 (17:28):
The yes, it's whether he was doing something else while hanging,
wasn't it. It was the audio asphixiation sit.

Speaker 1 (17:33):
You, I believe, Yeah, And I think his partner the
time was very much promoting that idea.

Speaker 4 (17:38):
Yeah he tried it me no nah, have you No, No, no,
not really. It's high risk.

Speaker 1 (17:46):
Born on this day nineteen eighty six. Oscar Pistoria, South
African athlete and murderer. Nineteen eighty four. Scarlet Johansson, American actress.
Oh yeah, she's forty today.

Speaker 4 (17:59):
That before four overroll Scay Joe.

Speaker 1 (18:02):
Yeah. In ninety sixty seven, Oh oh yeah, Boba, he's
talking about keeping a top hog in the hedge.

Speaker 4 (18:07):
This was a tough dog to keep on the porch.

Speaker 1 (18:09):
Morris Boom Boombecker, German tennis player one Wimbledon in eighty five,
eighty six and nineteen eighty nine. He's born in Germany's
fifty seven. It's only fifty seven, and Jamie Lee Curtis
was born on this day in nineteen fifty eight.

Speaker 4 (18:25):
Breath of fresh air, Daniel resolutely.

Speaker 1 (18:28):
So there we go, and it's National Flossing Day today,
and it's not flossing the dancing. It's flossing, the exercise
that you do with a piece of string in your teeth.

Speaker 7 (18:40):
The Hodarchy Breakfast on Radio Hodarchy.

Speaker 1 (18:43):
A sc head Gulaane joins us in the studio this morning,
coming up after seven o'clock. We're going to be going
over the Warriors' fixtures for twenty twenty five. Rud has
gone through the list, the drawer and he has our
path to the Grand Final. It's it's it's clear, it's easy.

Speaker 4 (19:05):
Don't do it. Why do we do it to ourselves?
Just go in blind, going completely blind into the season
with no expectations and see what happens.

Speaker 1 (19:13):
Well at the moment to be thinking that the Warriors
a pretty good bloody chance of taking it out mate
at thirty four bars thirty four that's some good eating, yeah,
Melvin st three seventy five. The Panthers are four point fifty.

Speaker 4 (19:29):
Eat the six Panthers. They've lost a few players, they
won't be anywhere near there.

Speaker 1 (19:33):
The six Pences go the storm at I mean, only
paying three seventy five at the stage in the season
to win win the NRL.

Speaker 4 (19:40):
It's outrageous. They haven't lost having they haven't lost any players.
They're still a very strong outfit.

Speaker 1 (19:44):
Isn't that remarkable?

Speaker 4 (19:45):
Whereas the Panthers have lost a few, Warriors have lost
a couple but gained a couple. I'm looking forward to
seeing this path to the Grand Final.

Speaker 1 (19:54):
Also, apparently Ruder has had a argument, a text argument
with you regarding dates.

Speaker 4 (20:00):
Yeah, he's an idiot. He's a massive idiot. He's living
in a different world and I'm not sure how he's
even employed now.

Speaker 1 (20:07):
I'm looking forward to hearing why he's an idiot and
why he's only just employed.

Speaker 4 (20:11):
He's unemployable. Actually, I've decided that, Okay, we'll.

Speaker 1 (20:14):
Get stuck into that up to seven. This is the
Hurdarchie Breakfast on.

Speaker 7 (20:19):
The Hurdarchy Breakfast with Jeremy Wells on Radio Hdarchy, News, entertainment,
sport and music that ares available everywhere on the old
Heart radio app Jeremy Wells.

Speaker 4 (20:33):
On Radio Don't Money.

Speaker 1 (20:36):
Welcome along to the Hidarche Breakfast Friday, the twenty second
of November twenty twenty fourth Mash He's back on the buttons.

Speaker 3 (20:43):
Oh, Happy Friday, Bloe. How many sleeps till Christmas? MESHI, Oh,
that's a good question. I think it's thirty two. I believe, Yeah,
thirty two.

Speaker 4 (20:51):
Thirty two sleep still. Sanda comes down the chimney for
your machine.

Speaker 3 (20:54):
Are you looking at me? I'm not sure if that's right.

Speaker 4 (20:57):
Have you got your Have you got your list? Have
you got your list?

Speaker 3 (21:00):
I got my list.

Speaker 4 (21:00):
You've been pretty naughty though, Yeah, I mean pretty naughty, I.

Speaker 3 (21:04):
Know, but I have got my list out there. I've
let my lovely partner Lauren know what's on that list.
This year, We'll say this far less material items this year, looking.

Speaker 4 (21:17):
For party favors.

Speaker 3 (21:18):
I know. I'm just looking to move on. I'm maturing.
I'm now looking for the list, you know, items and
more kind of memories. Okay, that's not those ones that
you put on that. I don't know what we're talking
about this one.

Speaker 1 (21:29):
I feel like we're taking about this because the lane
joins us.

Speaker 4 (21:33):
Yeah, Friday made it to another Friday made it to
another week. Knock off at one o'clock today. See at
the pub, we.

Speaker 1 (21:43):
Just talk about these pillows.

Speaker 4 (21:47):
So we were we're getting comfort pillows. They're called comfort
comfort bits. Yeah, we're basically we'll explain it a bit,
but we're asked to draw our own downstairs.

Speaker 1 (21:58):
Yeah, what more details in a moment.

Speaker 7 (22:03):
You breakfast with Jeremy Wells al.

Speaker 1 (22:06):
Radio accad Gulane joins us in the studio this morning.

Speaker 4 (22:10):
Hey, we got a pretty enticing offer recently, myself and you,
Jeremy around our downstairs, which.

Speaker 1 (22:20):
But I've been a long time since I had an
enticing offer around my downstairs, to be honest.

Speaker 4 (22:25):
That's right, me too. So I don't know. You were
familiar with family planning, the government department family Planning when
you were growing up.

Speaker 1 (22:33):
Yeah, that's right. That's the place that you used to
go to to pick up your free doms.

Speaker 4 (22:36):
Yes, they had a big bowl of domes on the
on the on the counter.

Speaker 1 (22:39):
Huge bowl of domes. I mean, did anyone ever can
I Christ for family planning? Historically, did anyone ever go
to family planning and plan a family?

Speaker 2 (22:47):
No?

Speaker 4 (22:47):
And that's why that's why, Jeremy, they've rebranded, They've come
out and they've rebranded as Sexual Wellbeing Alter. That makes
more sense, Yeah, totally, because otherwise you might as well
have called it Free Doms Central, because that's all it
was for. No one was going in there. I want
to plan, I want I want a boy, girl and
a boy two years apart. So it's now Sexual Wellbeing

(23:07):
at And they're trying to break the stigma of you downstairs,
you know, and talking about you downstairs and everything. So
they have offered to create our own emotional support bits,
something that you know, we can we can cuddle when
we're feeling a little bit down and lonely. And they've
asked us to draw our own downstairs and then they
will recreate that in the form of a pillow you know,

(23:31):
that you can cuddle in and get a bit of
emotional support. Now, the issue was they asked us separately
to draw our downstairs and I'm going to show you
Finn Mashie here and describe the two drawings.

Speaker 3 (23:45):
Okay, right, okay, so we're looking at okay, so this
is a okay, this is okay. So you've showed me
a photo here of a piece of paper that has
got two downstairs on it.

Speaker 1 (23:54):
Yep.

Speaker 4 (23:55):
We're asked to draw them to represent ourselves and then
they'll re create that in a life sized pillow.

Speaker 1 (24:02):
Jesus Jerry.

Speaker 3 (24:03):
Okay, So Jerry's is up the top and what can
it can only be described as as long and skinny,
really can't it.

Speaker 4 (24:10):
It's a lane, it's a sort.

Speaker 1 (24:11):
That's how it's been described in the past.

Speaker 3 (24:13):
Long and skinny with two very tight little testicles.

Speaker 1 (24:18):
That's that's there.

Speaker 3 (24:20):
We go.

Speaker 4 (24:20):
That's it's going to be great to cuddle. It's going
to be like one of those pregnancy pillows. You know,
if if anyone's ever had a baby and a wife
has been heavily pregnant, they sell in those giant those sausages,
those long, skinny sausages they put between their knees.

Speaker 1 (24:31):
I there's pretty much more is running to be fair. Mine.
The other thing is that mine's mine. Can is that
image there, that particular representation that that drawing of it.
It is very long and skinny. It looks very long,
and that that's because of the ratio. Asp that's life size.

(24:52):
That there's a there's a problem with its ratio. The
skinny part of it is accurate, the length part of it,
you know, sometimes it just the ratio blows it out
a little bit into its length.

Speaker 3 (25:05):
Okay, well, if your linth is blown out due to
the ratio, Gulaine looking at yours a little here, I
would say, Yep, definitely girthier.

Speaker 1 (25:16):
Yep, that's definitely shorter.

Speaker 3 (25:19):
But without a doubt. I mean, wow, look at that.
I think the wind on that thing.

Speaker 4 (25:23):
Having having looked at both of these, I think they
almost represent our physical bodies as they are, you know
what I mean? Like I'm slightly short and girthy. Jerry's long,
skinny and kind of heealless.

Speaker 3 (25:36):
Someone explained to me, so how do these pillows work?
So are you going to have this a pillow of
your downstairs up beside your face? And are you going
to have a pillow down beside your downstairs that looks
a little bit like you're downstairs.

Speaker 4 (25:46):
No, they make a full sized pillow.

Speaker 3 (25:48):
It does not look like a downstairs.

Speaker 4 (25:50):
That's the downstairs operation of a woman. Obviously you go,
so you create. See there's pillow here, and they're arriving
next week. So next week I'll bring them in neighbor
at half a meter forgive me.

Speaker 3 (26:03):
So I thought you were going to be getting a
pillow of your downstairs, but what you're actually getting is.

Speaker 4 (26:08):
Your We're getting a four D like recreation of it.

Speaker 1 (26:12):
That's right. But it's in pillow form so you can
use it. I mean my one can be used as
a neck travel pillow.

Speaker 4 (26:18):
Yes, such as it. Hey, look, it's about getting you
as comfortable with sexual health. Maashy.

Speaker 3 (26:25):
You should be.

Speaker 4 (26:25):
You should be out of anyone.

Speaker 1 (26:28):
There's not enough material for Mash to make it.

Speaker 7 (26:30):
The Hurchy Breakfast All Radio.

Speaker 1 (26:34):
Gilane joins us in the studio. We have drawn our downstairs.

Speaker 4 (26:38):
Operations for sexual wellbeings altered, Sexual well being altered, which
always family planning, which was the free dommies on the
counter family planning.

Speaker 1 (26:47):
Yeah, and we're getting downstairs as the representations of the
mate and two pillows emotional support bits yep and I
believe as well. Six olives Morgan pen she's getting her
downcas operation made into a pillow.

Speaker 4 (27:02):
Yes she is. Her drawing was very detailed. Wasn't very detailed?

Speaker 1 (27:07):
Wasn't it a lot going on?

Speaker 4 (27:08):
I must have been whoever's commissioning that pillow, because it's
been hand knitted by a bunch of old ladies out
and Upper Hut. So that one there is going to
require a lot of wool.

Speaker 3 (27:17):
Yeah, sorry, hang on, So do you send these drawings
of your downcas that you've done Jerry once again?

Speaker 6 (27:22):
Long and skinny, g Lane, powerful and fat, powerful and fat?

Speaker 1 (27:26):
Would you say powerful and fat? I would say, I
would say short and fat.

Speaker 3 (27:30):
Someone chose like so, some would say choked like, some
would say turty, someone say, you know, wide and powerful. Whatever,
we're gonna go with that. So you seen those photos
down to some old ladies and upper Heart and then they.

Speaker 1 (27:40):
Trem them up, yeream them and that's a good use
of resource time, et cetera.

Speaker 5 (27:49):
Has there been any chat about getting Suzanne Paul involved,
because then obviously she could rebrand the message pillow?

Speaker 3 (27:56):
Uh?

Speaker 1 (27:56):
Yeah, no that at this stage that I don't think
there's any plans of fire to turn it into any
kind of vibrating pillar or anything like that. As I said,
mine is so long and so that you can and
it's so soft that you can put it around you
and you can use it as a travel pillow.

Speaker 4 (28:10):
And mine's more doorstop. You could sit.

Speaker 1 (28:16):
Very heavy and a lot of ticks coming in. Someone
saying shortened think will do the trick. But long intern
we'll get right in. Not necessarily because mine and I
need to put a little caveat on this one. Mine,
of course, is it's it's a state of unarousal. Yes,
and mine, I'm very much a shower. And so what

(28:37):
happens with mine is like almost like a piece of string.
It dangles down quite long, but then when it when
it decides to make itself, you know it, it sucks
right back up and and it sort of halves.

Speaker 4 (28:51):
Down something hydraulic arm kind of going up and in.

Speaker 1 (28:54):
Okay, it really shortens up.

Speaker 4 (28:57):
Okay, so well look, I mean, at lease, you're up front,
you're just a shower. This is what you're going to
get this. Potentially it could get a little smaller.

Speaker 1 (29:04):
Oh quite a bit smaller at halves. I find it's
more effective that way. When can people purchase these pillows.

Speaker 4 (29:15):
Well, they can't purchase them just yet, but we could
put them up for auctions. How much would you pay
for my downstairs tom.

Speaker 1 (29:22):
Oh, how long is a piece of string before it
tucks back into its body and shortens up by a hearth.

Speaker 5 (29:29):
I'm just worried about what the pillow cases look like.
They're just a little bit shorter than the except for
the pillow sticks out the end.

Speaker 1 (29:35):
That's exactly what it's going to look like.

Speaker 7 (29:38):
The Hurchy Breakfast with Jeremy Wells on Radio Hodarchy.

Speaker 1 (29:42):
We're just talking about the NRL next year. The drawer
is out yep Ruder has posted it. The worries twenty
twenty five NRAL fixtures of course, starting with the Raiders.

Speaker 4 (29:53):
In Las Vegas, Bloody Vegas.

Speaker 1 (29:55):
And you're going along with two hundred lizards.

Speaker 4 (29:57):
Yeah, absolutely, we're going along with Boy Trip and we've
got a bunch acc people as well, and excitedly, we've
actually got i think another five seats to give away
to join us to go to Vegas and the Alternative
Commentary Collective. You can find out the details when we
start commentating next Friday for the English series on iHeartRadio.
But if you want to secure a place for you

(30:18):
want to mate, go to Big Barrel and they've got
the details here on how you can join us, a mate.

Speaker 1 (30:23):
God. Yeah, so that's so dangerous. So how long do
you are you going forward? Do you know?

Speaker 4 (30:27):
So one night in La which we're going to go
to an NHL hockey game in La and then we
jump on a plane the next day and we've got
three nights in Vegas. We're going to go to top Golf,
We're gonna we've got a few functions to do, We're
going to go to the Obviously, I think we'll go
to the League at some stage, but I doubt it.

Speaker 3 (30:46):
One of the things I always hear about Vegas is
three nights is all you need. Yeah, it's all that
everyone ever sees about Vegas, Like only had three nights there,
but look, it's all you need.

Speaker 4 (30:53):
And there's another Black Nights NHL game on there as well,
which we're going to try and kind of wrench our
way into as well in Vegas. So yeah, So tune
into the ac SCE next Friday on iHeartRadio for the
English commentary. You'll find out how can win when a
place to join us or go to Big Beryl.

Speaker 1 (31:11):
That'll be quite, that will be quite the truck be
So I think you're right, three nights is exactly the
right amount. I was there once for five worth matt
heat and kid from trade Star, oh choice. And let's
just say that by day three things were starting to
go a wee bit pear shaped and at one stage
one of the touring party did end up vomiting inside

(31:33):
of some bushes which were located inside the MGM Grand.

Speaker 4 (31:37):
I think also one of the winners ended up in hospital.

Speaker 1 (31:39):
Yep, one of the winners ended up prone actually lying
in a car park of a strip cub. So it
was all all happened. But those those things actually that
happened on night one. But yeah, day five especually when
it rains, and it rained for two days, apparently the
two days of rain, because they get two days of
rain a year in Vegas. What rains two days, it

(32:02):
floods Vegas because there's no you don't need to obviously
have any drainage in a place where it doesn't rain.
So when it actually does rain, there's no stormwater, there's
no nothing, so everything floods and people drive around and
they don't know what to do. They've never driven in
rain before. It was a shocker.

Speaker 4 (32:19):
Speaking of Vegas, this weekend is the Las Vegas Grand Prix,
the Formula one Grand Prix, and it is on at
a great time seven o'clock on Sunday night. Even if
you're not into the motorsport, it's actually just a good
one to sit down and watch because the Las Vegas
One is an absolute circus and last year a hold
of oil was dumped on the start line by an
old vintage Chevy the you know the drain one of

(32:41):
the drain holes came up, covers came up and smashed
a card to bit. It's great stuff. I think most
of the drivers hate it, but it's a great spectacle.
And Liam Lawson is back in action as well. So
love Vegas.

Speaker 1 (32:53):
How much better is Formula One now that we've got
a guy in it.

Speaker 4 (32:56):
And he's I love it how he just doesn't give
any f about him one as well doing the fingers
the cgo pett Is getting stuck into all the other
old coddles in the in the plane. Didn't care.

Speaker 1 (33:08):
Now he's a great New Zealander's he's really representing New
Zealand in true New Zealand fashion. This is the Hurdarchy.

Speaker 7 (33:13):
Breakfast, the hood Achy Breakfast with Jeremy Wells available everywhere
on the iHeartRadio already, Hurdarchy.

Speaker 1 (33:20):
It's seven thirty one on the Hurderky Breakfast. Time for
your latest news headlines. The stabbing of a security guard
has shocked the Newmarket Business Association. The guard has a
serious injury to the neck and is in Auckland Hospital.
A long time voice actor behind Millhouse, but Simpson's very
uncoll friend is stepping away after thirty five years of whining.
Seventy year old Pamela Hayden, who voiced a host of

(33:43):
other characters too, is signing off from the Simpsons Millhouse.
Hate Milhouse, and the Viva Wars Vegas tour is ramping
up for the Warriors as the club prepares to join
the NRL's season opening trip to the Sin City. Chief
executive Cameron George says a group of diligent staff even
heading to Las Vegas this week to plan for the
match on March two against Camera. They are not already

(34:07):
put IDs on the game one hundred days out. Camera
Raid is paying two fifty and the war is paying
all fifty three.

Speaker 4 (34:11):
Well, I'll tell you what. They're going to have to
spend longer than a week to manage the two hundred
lizards that are coming with me to Vegas, so good luck, Cameron, George.
I believe we're in the same hotel as the Warriors,
so buckle up.

Speaker 1 (34:24):
Yeah, this thing is about Vegas. The two best days
you go to Vegas. So the day you arrive and
the day you leave those the two best days in Vegas.
It's quite something.

Speaker 3 (34:33):
Both of those teams that are playing in this ficture
camera and also obviously it's use two places that you
probably aren't looking forward to the most in terms of
going on a night out after after a win either.
So it'sange just putting two you know, in terms of
you know, Camebra put a shit a night out it's
be honest and Industrial penrose for being honest.

Speaker 1 (34:51):
Yep.

Speaker 3 (34:51):
So heading out Vegas, these two teams could be cut loose.

Speaker 4 (34:54):
Look, I mean they do, see I think they put
the teams up out of Las Vegas, sort out of
Vegas because they're Revaliere. I mean, because you've got the
NRL Integrity Unit, i e. The whitewash investigations which sweep
everything under the carpet and they just keep them so
they're well aware Mashy that there could be Bubbler's, they
could be simulated love making, to Beijeon fees and stuff
like that. So they are very well separate from the fans.

(35:18):
So but it's going to be one of the great
starts of the n L season. I cannot wait. I
will potentially not come home with my dignity intact, not
that I'll leave with it.

Speaker 1 (35:26):
But you haven't got your dignity back since we went
to the Munich beer Fest, so I don't know going on,
I'm going back even further. Got your dignity? When was?
When did you have dignity?

Speaker 4 (35:36):
I think I had it pre the chocolate covered candy
pop and candy cover banana went up.

Speaker 1 (35:41):
I don't think you did.

Speaker 4 (35:43):
Really, No, no, no, no, no, that's that's the meanest
thing you've ever said.

Speaker 1 (35:49):
Never had dignity to lose?

Speaker 4 (35:53):
What is dignity? What is dignity? Jeremy?

Speaker 3 (35:55):
What is it?

Speaker 1 (35:56):
What is it? Okay?

Speaker 4 (35:57):
All right, it's a philosophy.

Speaker 7 (35:58):
All right, you breakfast with Jeremy Wells already.

Speaker 1 (36:04):
Glane joins us in the studio this morning. Just about
didn't join us in the studio this morning actually because
he had a run and with executive producer Ruder. Yeah
I did via text.

Speaker 4 (36:13):
Yeah, look, I got past the egg by ruder, and
I believe that I'm in the right here, and if
I get some agreement, I think we should probably second
on the spot. If we get consensus. Okay, so what
was the disagreement over, Well, the disagreement it's it's this. Okay,
this will shock you to the core, but mesh, I'll
run it past you. You know you're one of the

(36:33):
part of the producing crew test. Okay. If I was
going to say to you, we've got a guest coming
in this Monday, Yeah, what day would you think?

Speaker 6 (36:45):
I mean, I would have thought that we've got one
in on the next Monday. Thank you for coming up.

Speaker 5 (36:50):
So bear in mind that this conversation happened yesterday. Okay,
So on Thursday and you're wording g.

Speaker 1 (36:57):
Lane, Hey, do you have Sam Whitelock Monday morning? Yeah?

Speaker 6 (37:00):
Yeah, yeah, it's clearly this Monday at age.

Speaker 1 (37:03):
That's Monday. So the day to day is the twenty second. Yeah,
so I would say that the twenty Yeah, that's the
twenty fifth.

Speaker 5 (37:11):
But would you not say, at this point, which is
more than halfway between Mondays or yesterday was less than
halfway between Mondays, would you not say that this Monday
was actually about three days ago.

Speaker 3 (37:23):
No.

Speaker 1 (37:24):
If you's someone coming in, if they're coming in in
the future, then then that they'll be coming in in
the future.

Speaker 4 (37:32):
Otherwise might have been in the future otherwise Monday.

Speaker 1 (37:34):
Yeah, they can't. Did they come in last Monday? You'd say,
come in last Monday? No?

Speaker 4 (37:39):
No, hang on, So this is why this show has
gone off the rails.

Speaker 1 (37:43):
You've got a guy.

Speaker 5 (37:46):
Okay, so yesterday, yesterday afternoon, would you have said that
Monday three days ago was last Monday?

Speaker 4 (37:53):
Yes?

Speaker 1 (37:54):
Really, you wouldn't have said this Monday or this Monday.

Speaker 3 (37:57):
We did this blah blah blah blah Monday.

Speaker 4 (37:59):
No, it's in prisent.

Speaker 1 (38:00):
Okay, But I mean you're talking about something that's a
future event, right, But what has to happen in the
future because you're not talking about the past. Why would
you be talking about the past. The other thing is
if it's Monday and two weeks, which is I thought
what you were going to be talking about, that's Monday week. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (38:17):
You see, this is where I get confused.

Speaker 1 (38:19):
Ruder.

Speaker 3 (38:19):
If you're confused about this, I understand it, because are
you Jerry confused about the fact that if we're going
to do something next Monday.

Speaker 1 (38:27):
Next Monday.

Speaker 6 (38:28):
Do you mean the Monday that is actually coming up?

Speaker 3 (38:30):
What do you mean next Monday?

Speaker 1 (38:31):
Well, I think if I said next Monday, then if
you said, hey, we're doing this next Monday, I'd be
like I would ask you at that point, are you
talking about Monday week? Because just to clarify that, because
and then that Monday week means not this Monday coming
but the Monday after that.

Speaker 5 (38:48):
Because I guess that's my point, Jerry, is that if
there's any part of you that's leaning into the fact
that the day three days ago was this Monday, then
what are you going to call next Monday?

Speaker 4 (38:58):
You can't have too this Monday, and can you Monday?
We listen. Look, I'm drawing a line here. I'm drawing
a line here this Monday. If you want to work
on radio Headachey Breakfast, get in touch three four eight three.
We are firing both our production team, who've got no
idea about time. This is, this is what's the problems being.
We've been looking for the small little bit. What's gone wrong?

Speaker 1 (39:19):
Well, you don't it's right front g Lane for the
last eleven years, couldn't tell you whether it's Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday,
Thursday or Friday. I mean, at least these guys know
what day it is. He couldn't even work out what
bloody day it was.

Speaker 4 (39:33):
My highlight with Matt Heath was telling him that it
was everyone was on holiday the next day and he goes, what.

Speaker 1 (39:39):
Oh, he never knew a public and this is a
serious thing. He could not tell you when public holidays were.
He couldn't tell you any dates. He couldn't tell you
the day. He genuinely has a disease of the brain,
not a disease, some kind of just a mental blot,
a mental block with working out what dates were. Slightly

(40:03):
it's a real.

Speaker 4 (40:04):
You should try scheduling them to commentate acs.

Speaker 1 (40:06):
Oh my god, under dysmorphia.

Speaker 4 (40:08):
I think it's called there you go, him and him
and Mikey have it.

Speaker 1 (40:11):
It's real.

Speaker 7 (40:12):
They breakfast already darchy.

Speaker 1 (40:15):
So for the last few weeks we've been putting you
in the drawer for a pretty special prize, giving you
and three mates a chance to roll vip stylet. This
year's Chasing the Fox. It's Friday, December thirteen. Eight celebrity teams,
six holes, a massive party at Royal Auckland and the
Grange Golf Club, food trucks, bars, DJs. ACC is going

(40:37):
to be commentating live on tv ins years TV one,
TV one, TV one at.

Speaker 4 (40:44):
Six thirty on the thirteenth the December, my Nice Stewart
and myself we'll be channeling our probably know our kind
of best Greg Nobolos, Brad not what's his name, novelo?

Speaker 1 (40:56):
What's his name? Greg Frank.

Speaker 4 (40:59):
And bringing you this event. And I look, I let's
just say mini Stuart and I his handicapped combined as
a half century. Okay, so we're commentating this event. It's
a good time. It is a great time. It's basically
all everyone is chasing Ryan Fox. So you've got teams
of celebrities who are all playing ambros. So that's best

(41:20):
ball pretty much, and they're all trying to beat Ryan Fox,
which is pretty funny when you've got what is probably
thirty people chasing one player. It's over six holes, and
you know what goals should be. Eating holes is too much? Yeah,
it should be twelve holes and then the shortened version
should be six. So this is the perfect amount. And
it is a bloody good time.

Speaker 1 (41:38):
Yeah. I am definitely looking at the team of people.
The worst player on the on the roster by a
long way, as you as me. So if you I'm
going to end up hoking one straight into the crowd,
no doubt. There's a lot of pressure because it's it's
like the fair way is lying on either side, and
normally people always stand behind me on the tee.

Speaker 4 (42:00):
Kaitlyn Clarkett, I.

Speaker 1 (42:02):
Think so, And of course we've got to work out
later on we'll talk about this, but we've got to
work out what Mesh's going to be wearing, because I
want him to wear some kind of asseless boiler suit. Okay,
you know, like the white one that they wear at
the Masters. But then when he turns around it turns
out that the back's taken out of it.

Speaker 6 (42:16):
I was just thinking a boiler suit with you know,
a covered ass, But no, I guess we can work.

Speaker 4 (42:22):
Maybe a flap, Yeah, maybe the weapon eight ball in
his mouth as well.

Speaker 1 (42:25):
Yeah, something we got to We've gotta we've got to
give the people what they want, MESHI speaking of giving
the people what they want on the line right now,
Daniel Blair, Good morning, Daniel, Welcome to the show. Morning morning, Daniel.
Congratulations you and three mates are rolling vip stylet this
year is Chasing the Fox.

Speaker 4 (42:43):
Oh my god, you're kidding me.

Speaker 1 (42:45):
Yeah, how good? Yeah, so you're going to have a
great time. There's lots going on there. Do you know
who you take along with you?

Speaker 8 (42:53):
Oh, I've got a few of minds that I have
to start protesting for there.

Speaker 3 (42:57):
They're putting in their applications.

Speaker 4 (42:59):
Oh good, idea, yeah, make them, make them do a
PowerPoint presentation each But you're going to love this, Daniel.
The party hole is the sixth hole, which is a
final path three there at Royal Auckland and the Grange
Golf Club. And you know what, you don't often get
to behave badly at Royal Auckland and Grange Club, but
you have a green light. Daniel's congratulations.

Speaker 1 (43:19):
How good, thank you, thank you. That's an absolute pleasure, Daniel.
We'll see you out there. Yeah, you're right, because normally
she's a stuffy old club.

Speaker 4 (43:27):
Oh yeah, I mean last year I got told off
numerous times talking on the phone, had on the head
and both times put the double finger back Grandma.

Speaker 7 (43:39):
The hod at you breakfast with Jeremy Wells al Radio.

Speaker 1 (43:43):
Just working out some technical things for the Chasing the
Fox event and the live TV coverages is going to
be on TVNZ one in prime time.

Speaker 4 (43:49):
I know, primetime on a Friday night, six thirty. We're
going to be unleashed. On the commentary. I can't wait
for the instant feedback.

Speaker 1 (43:56):
I'm trying not to think about it because as soon
as I start to think about it, I honestly go
cold and I start shaking because I've been on a
tee before and a televised situation where people then read
out your name on the tea. Now, Jimy Wells, this
is the New Zealand golf Opia and it is the
scariest thing you ever do. And I've done some reasonably
scary things stood up in front of a lot of

(44:17):
people at certain times, And this though, is the scariest
because you can screw it up so barely and you
know that people will just laugh at you if you
duff it. Or an airshot, imagine an earshot, just because
you get the yeps, you just tighten up a bit.

Speaker 3 (44:31):
We all have an issue because we've got conflicting priorities,
I think, don't we. I mean, Jerry, you'll mainly focus
on not embarrassing yourself, so you'll focus on embarrassing me.
I just don't want to be embarrassed, Julane. You're focus
on the commentary aspect of it.

Speaker 4 (44:42):
I'm focusing on and leveraging the embarrassment that you're about
to go through. That that's our angle, fellers.

Speaker 3 (44:48):
Why do we have to tune everyone into a loss already?
The way we're talking about this is, you know, how
do we get how do we you know, how do
we make messures? You know pants have a little less
ars in them. How do we know this from the goal?
Maybe we should just you know what, let's wipe the
slate cleaning, just go you know what this time this event,
let's actually just do it properly, and let's not sit

(45:08):
out to human what are we going.

Speaker 1 (45:10):
To get the driving range every day and then listens
and what are we going to do this?

Speaker 4 (45:14):
Just shut up?

Speaker 1 (45:16):
Do you think I don't.

Speaker 3 (45:16):
Pretend, Jerry, you're not down at the driving range every
single day working on this thing for years.

Speaker 4 (45:21):
Bullshitshy don't come in here with your positive attitude. Ogay,
here with you're trying to let's go into this with
a positive aude. We're gonna there's going to be a
huge on goal. Will never be allowed on TV in
yet again. You will never be out on TV again
because you'll be wearing like a woman's g poking out
the back of your golf pants. I think you should
do that.

Speaker 1 (45:41):
You will. No, you don't get, you don't get.

Speaker 7 (45:47):
You breakfast with Jeremy Wells on radio.

Speaker 2 (45:54):
Use entertainment, sports and music that available everywhere on the
I'll radio out Jennie.

Speaker 7 (46:00):
Wells on radio.

Speaker 1 (46:03):
Nice to Covety this morning on the hideche Briefast Friday,
the twenty second of November twenty twenty four, two Little Ducks,
twenty two November. Mesh, he's back on the buttons after
a brutal illness.

Speaker 3 (46:16):
Yeah, brutal illness. Actually, for some reason Dunedin left a
real demon inside me a couple of weekends ago that
didn't craft bearing food visible. I'm looking to blame someone,
and I'm blaming the city of Dunedin. Bing all right now, okay,
and annoyingly, I don't regret any part of it.

Speaker 1 (46:31):
Yeah, we know what then you go. That's called the
Dunedin flu. We know, we know how you get the
Dunedin flu.

Speaker 4 (46:36):
It's closely related to the Colombian flu. Yep, yeah, very
close cousin.

Speaker 1 (46:41):
Yeah, yeah, it's a nasal issue. Julane joins us on
the show this morning.

Speaker 4 (46:45):
Great to be here on Friday, Yeah, nice to have you.

Speaker 1 (46:48):
Yeah. Are you commentating the Italy game?

Speaker 4 (46:50):
Yeah, indeed we are, Yeah, exclusively on iHeartRadio nine o'clock
on Sunday morning, last all Wax game of the year,
and we're doing something interesting this Sunday. So the line
is a negative thirty eight and a half of the
tab so if you get some money on that, So
basically that's all blacks start the game minus thirty eight

(47:13):
and a half, okay, and if they get over that
and then you're in the money. So we're going to
start the commentary with all blacks niggative thirty eight and
a half Italy zero. So we're going to commentate the
game from negatives.

Speaker 1 (47:25):
Up to positive.

Speaker 4 (47:25):
So it's a world first.

Speaker 1 (47:26):
It's going to be a complicated. I don't know what.

Speaker 3 (47:30):
I actually don't understand this.

Speaker 4 (47:32):
So that's the line, you see, that's the line that
the bookies have got on the all black half point
for Yeah, so we start negative thirty eight.

Speaker 3 (47:41):
Now I'm going to say, you know how to make
life difficult for yourself. So we could end up with
a draw even if we win by thirty eight points.

Speaker 4 (47:47):
Yeah, thirty eight and a half, but thirty nine are
in the money, So just get it. You just got
to get on the overs.

Speaker 1 (47:52):
Yep. It's clear as.

Speaker 7 (47:53):
Much the hood at you Breakfast with Jeremy Wells on radio.

Speaker 1 (47:58):
So the All Black's playing Italy this week in the
final game for the All Blacks in these twenty twenty
four season, it's been a bit of a mixed bag
for losses.

Speaker 4 (48:06):
Yeah, but you take this Northern Tour. Just the one
loss against France I think at the start of this tour,
and that was only by one point beat Ireland, which
was you know what, I would actually lose all of
them as long as we beat Ireland because there was
so much niggle involved in that game around Ukonerica, Jouannes
Zombie and Johnny sex Pest and all of that rhetoric
that was going on from the World Cup. They were

(48:26):
still bitter about losing the quarter final. They were hanging
on about it, they all wrote books about it, and
then to go to Dublin on a Friday night and
spank them and shut the hell up, that was great.

Speaker 1 (48:37):
So you're confident that they're going to beat Italy this weekend.

Speaker 4 (48:39):
Then, yeah, absolutely, last game for Sam Caine. Also, the
last game probably hasn't been really announced, but he's off
to France next year's EP Lady Parandem.

Speaker 1 (48:49):
He's thirty two. Yeah, I thought he was older than that.

Speaker 4 (48:52):
So did I actually, but he's at this last game
as well. He's on the bench for this game. So
my hunch, this is my hunch, this with the tab
and I'm going to slap the one hundred dollars bonus
bed on it, and that is tries to Sam Kane
anytime and try to TJ Petinada coming off the bench
with in the last thirty to score a try as well.
The odds haven't been released for that yet, but I'd

(49:14):
say it'd be fairly juicy. But I think it's it's
going to be a fitting farewell. It's a vibe punt
for both those great servants of all that, particularly Sam Kine.
He's had a membe broke his neck in South Africa
and came back from that to Campton. The team. He's
a he's a warrior old the Cleveland Steamer.

Speaker 1 (49:29):
He's amazing. Yeah, I mean to think about breaking your neck.

Speaker 4 (49:32):
It's the worst possible scenario as a ruggie player, worst
case scenario.

Speaker 1 (49:36):
That is a remarkable thing. That dude is incredible to
come back from. To come back and then to put
your head in the kind of places that you've got
to put your head as a as an open side
flank after breaking your neck, Yeah, that shows incredible courage.

Speaker 4 (49:51):
Also, following in the footsteps of Richie McCaw is always
going to be tough. People are always going to criticize
Sam Cane's and unfair to him. He had a lot
of haters because of that. But he was one of
the greats and he will go down as one of
the greats. And so a feding farewell for the Cleveland Steamer.
Admittedly doesn't like his acc nickname the Cleveland Steamer, which

(50:12):
suspects that may he may have been involved in a
Cleveland steamer at some stage. But the only reason he
is called the Cleveland Steamer is because he is a
store of the Bay of plenty steamers. That is it.
There's no proof that he's done a Cleveland steamer. There's
no proof that some oven doores have been sat on okay,
but we will happily retire that nickname. And for the
love of Sam Kane, he's.

Speaker 1 (50:33):
Not the first professional Rabi player not be happy with
his acc nickname. Let's be honest.

Speaker 4 (50:39):
Yeah, kayleb Clark not overly happy with jebbeter Butt. What
a why so he's now known as the artist formerly
known as Jebbiter Butt, now known as Chew Clarker really
chu clucker?

Speaker 1 (50:51):
Yeah. Also Dick Pack never really that happy with his
nickname either.

Speaker 4 (50:55):
Yeah, we changed it to after David and then let
didn't go down well either. Aaron Smith.

Speaker 7 (51:00):
All such most beautiful the Darchy breakfast already.

Speaker 1 (51:06):
Acclane joins us in the studio this morning across the ditch.
I see they have announced the Australian Word of the Year.

Speaker 4 (51:13):
Interesting is that their version of the Bird of the Year.
We do Bird of the Year, they do word of
the Year. Probably their word yeah is colesworth What Well.

Speaker 1 (51:23):
It's a combination of supermarket giants Coals Yeah and Warworth's
and the Aussies came up with it because they're frustrated
with the supermarketdiopoly that exists. And we've got the same
geopoli going on here. Obviously you've got food stuffs and
you've got progressive, which you know, war words, prog stuffs, Yeah,
prog stuff. So I don't know that they really wound

(51:44):
up about the geopoly? Is that right?

Speaker 4 (51:45):
So how do you use that word? Do you use
that word? Is it a derogatory term? Is it like
can you stop colesworthing all the girls?

Speaker 1 (51:53):
Is it when you don't have a choice? Is it
when you only have a choice between two things?

Speaker 4 (51:57):
I've got no coals worth, Like I've got no choice?

Speaker 1 (52:00):
Year?

Speaker 4 (52:00):
That is how it's used. What what would we what
we have here?

Speaker 1 (52:03):
What?

Speaker 4 (52:04):
What can we nominate for word of the year?

Speaker 3 (52:06):
And is it a bit of a lose lose situation?
Could you use colesworth? And like you know, you've got
two options?

Speaker 1 (52:12):
It's a Colesworth both a bit of a it's court
being caught between a rock and a hard place. That's
kind of where I thought again with this, But maybe
that's not right either.

Speaker 4 (52:20):
Like I'm in a Colesworth, I'm in a yeah, a
bit of a bind without it.

Speaker 1 (52:25):
Yeah, So the word has to be related to the
news and what's going on at the moment. So I
guess in terms of what would be out word of
the year. I mean, what's happened this year. Earlier on
in the year, in terms of cricket, Neil Wagner retired.
Do you remember, Yeah, he had a Wagner, but you
remember he was he didn't play in that final test.

Speaker 4 (52:44):
Yeah, maybe that's an exclusion. You had a Wagner which
you didn't quite hit the farewell you deserved. You're being wagnered, yeah,
because when someone's leaving work, when they get fired or
laid off, either being wagnered, no farewell, no nothing.

Speaker 1 (52:55):
In recent times there has been politically, I guess has
been the parliamentary hackery, which is maybe when you get
sort of struck from the side by a flash mob,
something that happens to you that you're not expecting.

Speaker 4 (53:10):
But it goes viral.

Speaker 1 (53:11):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (53:12):
Yeah, or the potentially I've had a massive MONOUI.

Speaker 1 (53:16):
Okay, so that's when you have a real shitter, essentially
going to a different place thinking that you're doing something
good surveying a reef whips today, is that you end
up on the reef and spilling oil.

Speaker 4 (53:26):
Yeah. As an example, we all went to Munich for
Beerfest and one of the members one mentioned his named
phil he had a huge money annui on day two
at the Bearfest. He left a lot of oil slicks
and his leader housing and disgraced himself and a foreign
foreign land.

Speaker 3 (53:47):
That's right, how they is going to be monoanui And
it's if you travel internationally.

Speaker 1 (53:52):
Yes, and.

Speaker 3 (53:55):
We got intent okay, that's the key part of it.

Speaker 1 (53:57):
I think. So you go, you go somewhere with good
intent and then the you have an absolute shit. Certainly
that was exactly what happened to fill there on. He
did he ever create New Zealand?

Speaker 7 (54:09):
Absolutely, they breakfast already.

Speaker 1 (54:13):
A lot of suggestions coming in for words for a
New Zealand word of the year. This is on the
back of the Australians and out seeing the word Colesworth
is their word of the disappointing Actually from Australia, it's better, Yes.

Speaker 4 (54:26):
So did I I expected something a bit more bogan
and a bit more crass, but they've come out with
something that's just a bit missionary.

Speaker 1 (54:35):
Doing a goal is a suggestion and that's taking something
that's not yours.

Speaker 4 (54:41):
That's good.

Speaker 1 (54:42):
Patch ban is a new rule that sounds good in theory,
but no one's really thought it true or thought how
it's actually going to work. All I did say people
were arrested three minutes after midnight for wearing gang patches
used today.

Speaker 4 (54:55):
So with a gang pitch, do you like we've got
a gang the a CC, We've got the common Tiros
and we've got a patch and everything ready to go.
Careful So if we roll out with the common Tiros
and man Ira and I are walking down the street
now common Teiro because of what I did, I really
I enjoy the vest of leather vest. It's a good look.

(55:16):
I'm struggling to find anyone to do the embroidery for us.
I think it's a cash only type situation. Will we
get arrested for that?

Speaker 1 (55:24):
I'd be less worried about being arrested, And I think no,
firstly because I believe you're not up to anything illegal, okay,
But the second part of it is more worried about
what the commonierros might do. That's that's more the That's
more what I'd be concerned about.

Speaker 4 (55:42):
It's at least someone at the common Chiero has got
a sense here.

Speaker 1 (55:44):
Yeah, they've always got a sense of human.

Speaker 7 (55:52):
Jennie Wells on Radio.

Speaker 1 (55:57):
A thirty one, I'm a head of your breakfast time
for your latest news here lines A fifth tourist has
died worth methanol poisoning in Lao, while a Kiwi tourist
remains unwell. UK authorities are confirmed that the twenty eight
year old woman from Kent had become sick after reportedly
drinking free shots from a bar popular with tourists.

Speaker 4 (56:16):
This is grim, Yes, is grim. It happens a little
bit in places like Turkey as well, where you go
to The basic rule of Thumber is if you go
to a bar and it's it's too cheap to be true,
it's because it's made of it's just basically straight methanol
with a little bit of flavoring in it. Oh, it's
pretty grim. And they put it into this is a
trick they do. They put it into like mainstream brands.

(56:37):
So they'll get a smon Off bottle and they'll fill
that with methanolans that's smirnoff. Yeah, these are shots when
really nit.

Speaker 3 (56:43):
Oh it's actually gutting, isn't it, Because there's ruining these
people's lives in the sense that now people can't have
a drink without worrying about this type of thing.

Speaker 1 (56:50):
Moving forward, it's terrifying.

Speaker 3 (56:51):
Now we can't have a drink about thinking about this
type of thing. It's funny, full on.

Speaker 4 (56:55):
Yeah, you just got to go for a can. Crack
the can yourself, so get ice cold Canna export ultra.

Speaker 1 (57:01):
Yeah. The first of Spirit will ramp up on Sunday
with the annual Auckland Santa Parade. Deputy mere Disley Simpsons
says should be taking part again this year, cruising through
in a vintage car.

Speaker 4 (57:13):
I can't wait. Will she be wearing anything in particular?

Speaker 1 (57:16):
I'm not sure. But have you seen Deputy mere Disley
Simpson before?

Speaker 4 (57:21):
No, No, I haven't. I was hapy for a ball gown.

Speaker 1 (57:24):
I see a lot of work. And Sam Caine and
TJ Peinada have been named for one final All Blacks
test came or start at open side flanker against Italy
on Sunday morning in Turin while Patternada was in half
back in reserve. The odds at the tab have been
updated this morning and they are Italy paying twelve dollars

(57:48):
and New Zealand some good eating at a dollar one.

Speaker 4 (57:50):
Oh yeah, see what that's gonna be? Freezing cold minus one.
There's the predicted temperature on Sunday morning live coverage on
iHeartRadio with the acc.

Speaker 1 (58:00):
Some bizarre scoring situation that you're going with.

Speaker 4 (58:02):
Oh yeah, the line's being moved to thirty and a half,
so the all Blacks start at minus thirty and a half.
It's Lee zero. So that's how it kicks off, and
that's how we're going.

Speaker 3 (58:11):
To call it.

Speaker 1 (58:11):
Right, So at the moment, the score is New Zealand
minus thirty and a half. Yep, at'll zero, yeah, yep,
I'll be super clear. You need a calculator if you're listening.

Speaker 7 (58:23):
They breakfast all Radio Darchy.

Speaker 1 (58:26):
See here Glane joins us in the studio this morning.
You see yesterday in parliament, National's Erica Stamford, who's the
Minister of Education, called Labour's education spokesperson Jen Tannetti a
stupid bitch.

Speaker 4 (58:40):
Yeah, well she answered, she did ask a pretty she
asked a pretty stupid question and got thrown back in
her face around school bus routes and the fact that
Labor had canceled just as many as National. So as
she sat down, she gave you that answer and then wed. Anyway,
obviously they've taken high offense to the fact that she's
been called a stupid bitch. I did get thinking, what

(59:01):
the potentially the meanest thing anyone's ever said to me?
And that actually it's probably not the most. I've been
abused a lot, you know, just straight out abuse. But
that's like, you know, that's water off a duck's back
kind of situation. It's the ones that cut a bit
deep and get you thinking. And We're at a cricket
match one day, I think it might be now in
christ Church and someone walked past me, look at you.

(59:22):
You PlayStation one, Simon Doll, oh and oh. And I
was like, and I had to think about it, and
I was like, you saying, I'm a I'm a shipboosion
of Simon Simon what, I'm a shipbsion of Simon Doll?

Speaker 2 (59:34):
And he what?

Speaker 4 (59:36):
And I kind of went back into the caravan and
I and I had to think about it, and it
stuck with me. This was about ten years ago.

Speaker 1 (59:43):
Yeah, that's that hurts. Yeah, I understand that funny those
things that do cut through. I remember once I was
playing cricket and someone got me out and as he
ran parss me, the bowler goes and that's the news boy,
And I was just like and he was giving me that,
you know, the first Yeah, for some reason, I never forgot,

(01:00:07):
never forgotten.

Speaker 4 (01:00:07):
That, Mashie. Surely there's some You've had some mean stuff.
I mean you were a ranger for a start.

Speaker 3 (01:00:12):
Yeah, it's all read here.

Speaker 4 (01:00:13):
It used to be quite porky, and now you're now
you're quite baff You operate some pretty humiliating fashion sense. Yeah,
you've got jewelry all over the fingers. Yeah you have
one super Bowl, but it's got no jewelry on it.

Speaker 3 (01:00:25):
I mean, this is something I already feel like.

Speaker 1 (01:00:29):
That anyone said to you already. Hey three four eight
three text us, text us your worst insults. Yeah, it's
cyber bully Friday. We used to do this on the
Heckecky Breakfast years ago, cyber Bully Tuesday, where people weren't
allowed to say anything anymore. Everything has gone a little
bit soft, and we said, look, we'll take your abuse.

(01:00:49):
If you're feeling a little bit upset at the world,
we will take it.

Speaker 4 (01:00:52):
Yeah, fire it at us, absolutely, and look, make it
a bit spicy than stupid bitch, please, because that that
is nothing to me.

Speaker 3 (01:00:58):
This lady should play game of cricket.

Speaker 4 (01:01:00):
Yeah, yeah, put jan Toinetti open opening Batsman against Eastern
Suburbs and Hamilton the Bees by the way, not the Bees.
I got called a hairy tailing rapist by Eastern.

Speaker 1 (01:01:12):
Study Hamilton Kirk.

Speaker 4 (01:01:15):
Cricket chance not okay, I mean I wasn't even doing anyone.

Speaker 1 (01:01:18):
Three for eight three your worst consults, the hod.

Speaker 7 (01:01:22):
A Breakfast with Jeremy Wells.

Speaker 1 (01:01:25):
A radio so Nationals Ericus Stanford allegedly called Labour's Jan
Tinetti both of them education spokespeople. Well, one's the education minister,
Erica Stanford a stupid bitch, stupid and Parliament yesterday apparently
interesting Erica Stamford, the National's Education Minister, has uttered a

(01:01:47):
few things.

Speaker 4 (01:01:48):
Yeah not the first time. She's under her breath going.

Speaker 1 (01:01:51):
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 4 (01:01:52):
Well it'll be very hard to do because when Parliament
there's a hot mics everywhere, and imagine if there I mean,
look if the MIC's are on between breaks, imagine those
hot mics. Well I think I'd be in jail. But
so in Parliament they're hot the whole time. So you
can't muttering stuff. You always gonna get caught. I'm supposed
more farts haven't been caught actually in Parliament just there.

Speaker 1 (01:02:12):
That's true.

Speaker 4 (01:02:13):
Yeah, that's true.

Speaker 1 (01:02:14):
What are they sitting in the general? Sitting on those
are those leather seats?

Speaker 4 (01:02:17):
They are to put sheepskin on the mantain. But I
suppose yeah, I like, I mean you have to do
a pretty I mean doesn't get recorded, does it far? Anyway,
were encouraging you.

Speaker 1 (01:02:29):
Got way laid. Yeah, we've been encouraging people to insult
us on three for three or just just insults in general.
And this one here was the first one through. If
you were the strongest sperm out of one on a million,
imagine how pathetic the other ones would have been.

Speaker 4 (01:02:46):
Fair enough? Is that targeted anyone?

Speaker 1 (01:02:48):
No, not at the stage. No, this one he has
targeted at you, Glane g Lane, the poster child for
pro choice. This one here, this is not taking a
Remember it's talking about someone. This is once a French
member of our rugby team dropped the ball on the

(01:03:08):
set piece and this was said, thanks for the back
line terrorism, you snail eating surrender monkey. WHOA, that's quite intense.

Speaker 4 (01:03:16):
That's a mouthful to get that out too in the
right order.

Speaker 3 (01:03:19):
I'm pretty sureve read that out. I think we were
asking for these went with because we were wondering what
actually does offend people and what doesn't because we felt
like stupid be maybe asn't actually.

Speaker 6 (01:03:27):
The most efficive thing that you have heard.

Speaker 3 (01:03:29):
I mean, this is offensive. Listen to this boys, this
text to here agent for Double seven chadding to Canadian.

Speaker 1 (01:03:35):
Tourists in the bath. Thought it was going wow.

Speaker 3 (01:03:37):
Then one lovely lady said to me that you remind
me of Peter Griffin from Family Guy on you minight
was over pretty quickly there, and I think that might
be the meanest thing anyone has ever said to me.
Cheers Phil.

Speaker 4 (01:03:45):
Oh, he's a good guy though, Peter Griffin exactly.

Speaker 3 (01:03:47):
I take that as a compliment, said to you, Phil, Yeah,
if you're trying to make love to a lovely Canadian skier.

Speaker 4 (01:03:54):
He's married with two kids. Peter Griffin, he's a family man.
He's a family guy.

Speaker 3 (01:03:58):
I'm not sure he's a family guy. I'm just a
hundrederscent sure. If you want to be told that you
are like Peter Griffin, I don't know anyway.

Speaker 4 (01:04:05):
You're you're more a quagmire kind of.

Speaker 3 (01:04:09):
Okay, don't you start? You look a lot like other.

Speaker 4 (01:04:13):
Jerry's the old can we sound we're looking for you do.

Speaker 3 (01:04:19):
A little bit kind of the two muppets that kind
of looks similar. Yeah, you kind of give those vibes.

Speaker 1 (01:04:26):
Okay, thanks for listening.

Speaker 4 (01:04:28):
Straight Ericon he's a team of James Hunt Formula one driver.

Speaker 1 (01:04:33):
Oh yeah, I.

Speaker 3 (01:04:35):
Kind of get that.

Speaker 1 (01:04:36):
Thanks a lot.

Speaker 3 (01:04:36):
Maybe like a PlayStation one John Cena.

Speaker 1 (01:04:38):
I've been called I've been called Beaker, Baker.

Speaker 3 (01:04:42):
What's the one that I was looking for in terms.

Speaker 1 (01:04:45):
Of my face show?

Speaker 4 (01:04:46):
I think Sam the American Eagle with that.

Speaker 1 (01:04:50):
That's actually a great compliment. Thanks very much for listening
to The Haddicky Breakfast This week. Podcast is going to
be able at eleven a m. This morning.

Speaker 4 (01:04:58):
I have a bloody great weekend, New Zealand and a
great weekend.

Speaker 5 (01:05:04):
Thanks for coming in, Gula, My Visions, the Hdarchy Breakfast,
thanks to Bunning's Trade load up and what you need
to get the job done with Bunning's Trade