Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Do you consider yourself like an adult?
Speaker 2 (00:05):
Though?
Speaker 3 (00:05):
Yeah, at what.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
Point were you like, okay, life got real? Probably my
time in the military.
Speaker 1 (00:15):
Oh okay, yeah, you know what that would Uh that
was the first wake up called. Was not expecting that.
Uh what what age did you go in? I was nineteen?
You were nineteen when you went in you know what? So,
(00:36):
Diane think about you. You're going to answer that question
in a moment, like at what age were you when
life got real?
Speaker 2 (00:42):
And you were like, I'm an adult?
Speaker 1 (00:44):
But it's funny because in nowhere in this this this
kind of this survey that was done, did they ever
talk to somebody in the military. So I wonder, I
wonder if that would be completely different for somebody in
the It has to be. It has to be, Diane,
at what age did quote life get real?
Speaker 4 (01:05):
I'd say, like around like god like twenty two, twenty three.
Speaker 2 (01:10):
Twenty two when you're well?
Speaker 1 (01:13):
Tell me why may be right for you.
Speaker 4 (01:16):
Paying your own bills? Like living living on your own,
You're out of college, you're working, you know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (01:24):
Were you were you paying all of your own bills?
Were you like completely independent?
Speaker 4 (01:28):
Not completely?
Speaker 2 (01:29):
Okay? So life became real when you were partially independent.
Speaker 4 (01:34):
Well, I mean, if you're gonna then.
Speaker 2 (01:35):
A little bit everybody's answer, you're entitled to your own answer.
Speaker 4 (01:38):
Thankfully, my parents were helping me.
Speaker 1 (01:40):
With HOS sweater back on. You're trying to throw me off.
Speaker 4 (01:42):
No, I'm itching.
Speaker 1 (01:43):
Oh I thought you were trying to show me some
shoulder part.
Speaker 4 (01:45):
I mean they thankfully my parents were helping me out.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
Because my right, But that's when you felt like you
were an adult, when your parents were helping you out.
Speaker 2 (01:54):
I'm not trying to paint you into a corner.
Speaker 4 (01:56):
No, because but then and now I feel like I
should reevaluate my answer. So maybe maybe there wasn't that
for me.
Speaker 2 (02:03):
But I'm just leaving on your own.
Speaker 4 (02:04):
You're out of college, you're not in like the bubble
of fun anymore. You're working, Sure, you've got bills to pay, right,
that kind of thing, all right.
Speaker 3 (02:12):
Tyler, So I agree with Diane. It was after college.
Speaker 1 (02:20):
Well, I think anybody even like, even if you didn't
go to college, it's still I don't think anybody's gonna
say nineteen.
Speaker 3 (02:28):
Oh see, I would disagree. If you didn't go to college,
life probably got pretty real after high school graduation, Like
Evan said the Well he went to the military. But
even if you didn't go to the military, you were working. Yeah,
you got you gotta pay.
Speaker 1 (02:40):
Bills like the yeah, but you know what like like
for that's me by the way, right, Like I went
to college for six weeks and then moved on, like
I was living on my own in LA. But it
didn't seem like life got real. Like I was still
flubbing to get by. I was chased, Oh, you're making
a lot of mistakes. Oh more mistake. It's been living life.
(03:01):
So that's why to me, like life did because I
didn't take it seriously. I did, but I didn't. I
couldn't do anything about it. So it was like, yeah,
I'll write fake bounce checks. Who cares?
Speaker 3 (03:10):
But so you know, I had a child at my
first child at twenty nine, But life is already real.
A bought a house at twenty seven. Life is already real.
I really, I'm with Diane. I feel like at twenty three, really,
when it came when I realized how little the starting
salary actually was, I had agreed to and I had
(03:30):
to instead of going out put gas in the car. Yeah,
sure that was eye opening, and I would say life
got very real six months into having this job.
Speaker 1 (03:42):
Okay, all right, so maybe it is. Maybe it is
that young, but that's not the national average.
Speaker 4 (03:47):
Some people might say, like, no, it got real real
when I had a kid, and then you're not only
just trying to take care of yourself. You've got a
life that you have to take care of. Or like
he said, like like making a like buying my condo,
like that was a huge thing.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (04:02):
See I didn't.
Speaker 1 (04:03):
I never owned anything until I was in my thirties.
Speaker 3 (04:09):
Yeah. Now, so yeah it would have been it was
two years before my son was born, so yeah, it'd
be twenty seven.
Speaker 2 (04:15):
Yeah, how well was I?
Speaker 1 (04:16):
But I think I was like thirty one when I
bought a house.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
Thirty two? Is that right? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (04:22):
But life had to have already been real for you.
Speaker 2 (04:25):
Yeah, I mean I guess it was. I guess it was.
Speaker 3 (04:30):
I can't believe for you, it's not even though you
were making mistakes, maybe not when you had the comfort
of Houston, but when you drove out to California. Yeah,
like life didn't know anybody.
Speaker 1 (04:43):
No, it didn't feel real, not at all, because it
was halle weird. No, Like, there were definitely elements of
it when another city had made it feel different.
Speaker 2 (04:57):
I don't know the answer to that.
Speaker 1 (04:59):
You know what I will say, when I when I
moved to Philly, life felt real.
Speaker 3 (05:04):
How old were you then? I know it was just
a couple of years ago.
Speaker 1 (05:08):
Mid twenties yeah, mid twenties.
Speaker 3 (05:11):
Okay, a decade yeah, but when maybe.
Speaker 1 (05:14):
That's when life felt real transition, Yeah, because like like listen,
in Houston, I was already living by myself.
Speaker 2 (05:22):
I already had a job.
Speaker 1 (05:24):
I had no money, but I had no money in
LA like nothing changed, so I was still responsible for
paying all my bills. But it wasn't like I was
like I had a budget, you know, you know what
my budget was? What can I how far can I
stretch it this week? So there was no budget or
planning or anything. So why aren't you saying when you
started living by yourself in high school? Because that's still
(05:46):
like that you just did, but life didn't feel like
it didn't feel like, oh crap, everything got real.
Speaker 4 (05:51):
Yeah when I graduated Radford and moved to Roanoke because
that's where I got my first job, and I was
living in an apartment by myself, you know what I mean.
And I didn't know anybody, And I mean I had
a couple of friends from school who lived there, but
it was it was like, Wow, I'm an adult.
Speaker 1 (06:09):
Most people say they feel like by the way, the
national average is twenty seven. When people say that they
start feeling and that's looking at like older generations, younger generations.
But if you take everybody and loop it together, twenty
seven twenty eight is when people feel like, oh.
Speaker 2 (06:26):
Crap, life got real.
Speaker 3 (06:29):
So that did have people looking back, and not just
those who were twenty seven answering.
Speaker 1 (06:35):
Correct, okay, and they would say and so then they
said why, and some of them did say it's when
I got my own first place to live apartment, not
not necessarily buying a house, no, my own first apartment
or renting a house or whatever. It was being fully
independent from my parents right financially they're not helping out
with anything. And listen, I know that there are still
(06:56):
people in their forties whose parents are still paying their
phone bill, and I get it, and God bless you,
you're lucky. The but where they are like that was
the age where I was one hundred independent financially from
my parents. You know what The most common one was
where they felt like they got a career job and
it wasn't just another gig gig, yeah, gig that they
(07:19):
got a job, whether it was in what they went
to college for or you like if they didn't go
to college, it was like, oh, I got I got
a job and then listen, I get there's a lot
of people that go to trade school and then and
then get their jobs. Right, But it's not just like oh,
well I'm not going to college. My mom said I
have to do something. So I'm doing I'm doing uber
eats at night and I'm doing this and then I'm
going But where you got a job where you felt
(07:40):
like this is this is a this is a job,
like this could be a career. That's where a lot
of people went like that was the moment where they
were like this is the rest of my life and
not in a bad way, but a like I'm not.
Speaker 2 (07:58):
Going to quit this job and then go work long
John Silvia.
Speaker 4 (08:01):
It's exciting when if you've chosen a field and you're
actually working in it, that you're.
Speaker 1 (08:05):
Psyched for that, even if it's not the field that
you thought it was gonna be.
Speaker 5 (08:10):
Right.
Speaker 2 (08:10):
Yeah, that's where a lot of people.
Speaker 3 (08:12):
Went from Instagram. Surprised Elliott isn't saying now with both
kids off to college, life got different. That that's an
interesting one to me. Yes, obviously it's different, But for
(08:33):
is it because life was real way before that when
they were born? But does that mean life got real
for your kids because now they're off on their own
and they're about to soon be adults in a few
years without your roof over their heads.
Speaker 2 (08:48):
Yeah, I don't know. I don't know.
Speaker 1 (08:50):
I do know that two members of the Seagull family
were out and about it two fifteen this morning. Damn
fine my life rose sixty the no, not life three sixty?
Speaker 5 (09:01):
Fine?
Speaker 2 (09:01):
Mind No, I got a text the by the way.
Speaker 3 (09:04):
Hugh, right here on X, I'll be fifty five in October.
Life is starting to get real because the kid goes
off to college next year.
Speaker 1 (09:11):
But didn't you feel like life was real when you
had to like save like every freaking penny wow, in
order to be able to send him to college.
Speaker 3 (09:21):
But then right above that, al Toyto says, nineteen, it's
very very It's all over the place.
Speaker 1 (09:27):
But why here, Like I understand why Hugh said life
got real because your kid is going away and I
guess I can wrap my head around that mindset. But
life for you got real when life for you got
real when you had a kid.
Speaker 3 (09:42):
Well, you can't tell him.
Speaker 1 (09:43):
No, I'm not telling him how to feel. But then,
but my question would be why did al toyto feel
like at nineteen life became real? Is that like when
he got his first stick and poke?
Speaker 3 (09:52):
I would assume sorr, yeah, but it does.
Speaker 1 (09:55):
Started getting my more adult movie lines.
Speaker 3 (09:59):
Some of these people point to more specific milestones. So
a career job you can apply to many people, right house,
buying kid, you can apply those two a.
Speaker 1 (10:10):
Huge portion of the population. But by the way, that
is but there's no age set to that.
Speaker 3 (10:14):
But hung Justin says life got real when I quit drinking.
And then there are some other ones that are that
are very sad to read that involved heartbreak. But it's like.
Speaker 1 (10:26):
It's like my parents died and like, all of a sudden,
now I'm responsible. Yes, like there's no I get that, Yeah,
I totally get that.
Speaker 3 (10:33):
Or unplanned pregnancy something.
Speaker 2 (10:35):
Like, oh, I totally get that.
Speaker 1 (10:36):
Could you imagine how real life would get if all
of a sudden, you're eighteen years old and you get
knocked up or you knock someone.
Speaker 4 (10:44):
Up, yeah, and then you're responsible.
Speaker 2 (10:45):
You don't think life gets real quick at that point.
I get that.
Speaker 3 (10:48):
But there's hospitalizations though.
Speaker 2 (10:50):
Okay, not everybody's got to be a downer.
Speaker 3 (10:52):
There's abuse, there's I mean, it's those stories, as heart
wrenching as they are to read here, those are more
interesting than just someone saying, yeah, I got my career
job by.
Speaker 2 (11:07):
The way, you know, you know.
Speaker 1 (11:07):
The one that really stands out in that to me, though,
is the the who was.
Speaker 2 (11:12):
It got sober?
Speaker 3 (11:14):
Hung justin?
Speaker 2 (11:15):
Oh oh, that's right.
Speaker 1 (11:15):
That's when he switched from drunk justin to hung justin,
even though I still only refer to him as drunk justice.
Speaker 3 (11:20):
Well, he wouldn't change the damn name on X.
Speaker 1 (11:22):
The no no, But I bet, I bet that that
makes total sense to me, where all of a sudden,
you you straightened yourself out. You're like, now I have
to be responsible, right, I get that, that makes total sense.
I'll like it. It was a death, okay, did that's cool?
Speaker 3 (11:42):
The A lot of these stories are not going to
be as happy as your first born.
Speaker 1 (11:49):
The no, well that's okay, what if though, like I
keep saying, like Philly like that was when I realized,
like this is like like I moved to LA.
Speaker 2 (11:59):
I was young.
Speaker 1 (12:00):
I was dumb, you know what I mean, Like I
didn't care, like it was just let's pick up and go.
Speaker 2 (12:04):
And then and by the way, I.
Speaker 1 (12:06):
Left a job in Houston too after being offered a
job in LA. When I when I had to move
to Philly, I was out of work, fired, broke, and
on my own. So maybe maybe that's what it. Maybe
that's why I say Philly because I had to get
a job. I had to get my stuff to Scott,
(12:27):
moved my crap to LA like it was easy. I mean,
I was broke, but I was already broke, so nothing changed.
Speaker 3 (12:35):
Jay says, it's more about a mindset. Young Elliott is
a good example. You can be living in a very
real adult life, but if you don't feel the weight
of it, then it's not real to you.
Speaker 1 (12:44):
That's true, And I say I'll give you that Jessica
on Facebook.
Speaker 3 (12:46):
Right, I'll be forty next year with a four year
old and life does not feel real yet.
Speaker 2 (12:53):
Also, can I can I ask?
Speaker 1 (12:55):
Can I ask you guys this?
Speaker 2 (12:56):
And then I'll grab a bunch of these.
Speaker 1 (12:58):
So they talked about people feeling financially on their own,
not set, but I'm no longer getting.
Speaker 4 (13:06):
There's supported, there's no safety net.
Speaker 1 (13:09):
Getting their first career job. Nobody was talking about death
or substance abuse or getting clean the other thing that
sticks out in here. A lot of people said that
it was and they it kind of all rolls together
of being financially independent, whether by choice or by getting
(13:33):
cut off, so being responsible for their own finances, having
a job where you're getting paid not necessarily a tremendous
amount of money, but it's not like you have a job.
And then people said, and that's when I bought life
insurance at the age of twenty eight. I don't know
(13:54):
anybody that had life Nobody that was in my circle
had life insurance at the age of twenty eight.
Speaker 4 (13:58):
Maybe if you've got kids, that's something that is suggested.
Speaker 3 (14:03):
Suggested, but to go through it, Yeah, it was a
few years before I finally got my act together and
got the insurance.
Speaker 1 (14:10):
I hate life insurance.
Speaker 2 (14:11):
To me, it's the biggest rip off, it's the biggest scam.
Speaker 4 (14:14):
Well until you're dead, right, I'll get.
Speaker 1 (14:17):
It as I'm dying, But I don't know why am
I wasting that money. Now, I hate it. I hate
it and I don't and I'm dumb about it. I
don't know anything about it. Get term, get life, get
whole life, half life, whatever. I don't know.
Speaker 3 (14:33):
A couple of people this is a happier one. A
couple of people saying cars.
Speaker 1 (14:37):
Oh, getting getting a like, getting like getting a real
car as opposed to a hand me down beater.
Speaker 2 (14:42):
Perhaps, Yeah, that makes sense, that's your first big purchase.
Speaker 4 (14:46):
Yeh.
Speaker 3 (14:46):
But here's another one. I would say. Now I'm forty
two and my daughter's graduating this.
Speaker 2 (14:51):
Year, how does that feel like it's real?
Speaker 1 (14:53):
Need? What about when she was a baby that you
can't tell people? How? I don't know, I'm not How
are you not sitting there knowing that that that the
kid's coming and not going like, holy crap, I got.
Speaker 2 (15:07):
To take care of a kid.
Speaker 1 (15:08):
Yeah, that'll sober you up, No offense, justin that'll sober you.
Speaker 3 (15:13):
Up, for sure.
Speaker 1 (15:17):
But maybe where you can't just lay on the couch
hungover eating Chinese food every Saturday.
Speaker 2 (15:23):
God damn.
Speaker 3 (15:24):
But maybe it feels surreal. That's how I describe the
home birth. Now. Granted, it felt very real the second
we right went to the hospital, after the kid was
born and came back home, We're like, wow, we have
a second child. Now I understand what you're saying there,
I feel surreal for many years.
Speaker 1 (15:43):
Yeah, probably, but not when you're forty two. Once you
had the kid. When she was forty one.
Speaker 3 (15:48):
Diane took the advice tell people they were wrong.
Speaker 1 (15:51):
This is not a right or wrong answer. No, I'm
not saying it is, but the I mean, you're taking
issue with some of the suggestions. Yeah, I just remember thinking,
what the F did I do?
Speaker 2 (16:03):
Man?
Speaker 1 (16:04):
That is expensive. You're responsible for it. I could drop
it and kill it. Like all that goes.
Speaker 2 (16:11):
Through your head.
Speaker 3 (16:11):
Jenevie says, at twenty eight, I recognized that I started
thinking more broadly and rationally. Then thought, crap, Now I'm
an adult.
Speaker 1 (16:22):
That's a good answer. That's a good answer. But do
you like it just because it's close to your twenty seven?
You said no, no, no, no, you could have told
me that, like, I mean, that's me at a younger age.
Speaker 4 (16:31):
You were thinking broadly.
Speaker 1 (16:35):
No, you're not an adult yet, but that but that is.
But that's a mindset. That is a mindset, and it
just happens to be a twenty eight but that's where
they focused in and they were like, I have to
stop thinking about more than.
Speaker 4 (16:47):
Just next week.
Speaker 1 (16:50):
Yeah, exactly, so huge. I don't even know what broadly
and rationally means. Do I think that way now? Oh?
Speaker 2 (16:57):
Go ahead.
Speaker 3 (16:58):
Hugh is explaining or elaborating on the kid going off
to college.
Speaker 2 (17:02):
Oh my god, get over it.
Speaker 3 (17:04):
What getting real to me means worrying about life's This
is going to be very deep for someone whose name
is Hugh Jinveiny, right, means worrying about life's path until
the kid goes off. I've felt impartial control of that worry.
(17:24):
He is one hundred percent right, But when she goes
that ends, Yes, one hundred percent. So if your life
has followed a very traditional arc, yes, where it's like
schooling nutsy in college, but schooling graduate, high school, whatever,
they're living under your roof, meet somebody have a child.
All of that is textbook. But so now I get
(17:48):
that answer.
Speaker 1 (17:49):
Yeah, no, he I mean I understand that answer. Life
got real, should have been real way before that. However, No, no,
but I do. I do get that.
Speaker 4 (17:56):
It's just a new phase.
Speaker 2 (17:58):
Yeah, you're not in you're not in control.
Speaker 4 (18:01):
I mean, you hope you've taught them like, don't do
stupid stuff.
Speaker 1 (18:05):
I mean, listen, as kids get older in high school,
they're running off with their friends and getting in trouble
and all that other stuff.
Speaker 2 (18:12):
But you could still hammer it down. You're gone.
Speaker 3 (18:16):
Oh, Brian's got a good one.
Speaker 2 (18:18):
Go ahead.
Speaker 3 (18:19):
So whereas we talk about maybe job a relationship children
that follows I don't want to say normal.
Speaker 1 (18:28):
No, but if it follows their typical paths, that's fine.
Speaker 3 (18:31):
The nick you makes life get real fast.
Speaker 1 (18:35):
Oh, completely disagree, Completely disagree. The both my kids were
in nick You right, both of them were in there. Right,
that falls under surreal that that that to me is surreal.
I was you know, it's it's it's emotional, It is
scary as hell, very expensive, But that's surreal like that
(18:59):
is you don't have like you don't even process that.
Speaker 2 (19:02):
That is just to me, it's completely different.
Speaker 1 (19:05):
But I may as well have been nineteen years old
living in La not knowing what the f I was doing.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
You have no.
Speaker 1 (19:11):
Idea what you're doing other than going and occasionally trying
to whisper to a nurse on the side. Are they
gonna live like it's so? To me, that was so
surreal that that wasn't real life to me.
Speaker 3 (19:23):
Again, my daughter's introduction to the world was surreal. But
for my son I went to the NICU and then
learning about his heart condition, that was pretty real. But
the thing that and this is we've talked about this.
Your placement in the nick You puts things into perspective. Yes,
and the kids that are much worse off and are
in much scarier sort of status, if you will back
(19:49):
further into the department, that changes and makes you realize, oh, okay,
this is we can get through this. And you feel
terrible for what other families are dealing with.
Speaker 1 (20:03):
Oh yeah, oh it's horrible that I liked that example,
what's that the nick you your time?
Speaker 2 (20:10):
The nick you was that's rough. Oh it's not pleasant,
but you're right.
Speaker 1 (20:16):
You feel horrible like you're sitting there with your kid
and the family next to you comes in their kids
the size of a chicken wing, and you're like, oh,
pay no attention over here.
Speaker 3 (20:26):
Right all right?
Speaker 2 (20:27):
Yeah nick you? Yeah, sorry, Nick You was sir.
Speaker 5 (20:29):
Real.
Speaker 3 (20:30):
Oh, Brian writes, they were to hell. Daughter was in
there for three months, see all right, so he hit
the ball back to you, Elliott, right, all right. Well,
at least he was going home for three months. Elliott
slammed his racket line eight.
Speaker 1 (20:48):
Hi Elliot in the morning. By the way, I feel
like this bit's like a real serious turn. I was like,
you know, like, hey, I was old enough to buy
beer with like a real id.
Speaker 2 (20:59):
I'm sorry, yes, who is this?
Speaker 5 (21:02):
Hi? Good morning guys.
Speaker 2 (21:03):
Hey, how are you.
Speaker 5 (21:05):
Good?
Speaker 1 (21:05):
Good?
Speaker 5 (21:06):
This is Corbyn from Richmond. I just want to say
life got real. Sorry, I'm changing my daughter's dipert here.
Life got real when I turned twenty three and went
to prison. That probably would do it right there.
Speaker 1 (21:17):
Oh that's a great answer. Wow, that's a great answer.
That's not surreal. No, no, no, you know what that
that is? That is sobering. That is real. Yeah, probably
the realest thing ever writ there.
Speaker 2 (21:33):
I bet that first night we met boy winter winter
chicken dinner.
Speaker 1 (21:40):
By the way, I if I went to if I
went to if I went to prison tomorrow, that's when
life gets real.
Speaker 2 (21:47):
Top of the list, top of the list. Sorry to
anybody who died or got sober or.
Speaker 1 (21:53):
Nick you, but Rachel, Rachel got pregnant at fifteen.
Speaker 2 (21:57):
That's pretty real.
Speaker 1 (21:58):
No, you know what that that's sir, and you know what,
jail still the winner. All Right, dude, I appreciate it.
Thank you, my friend. Yes, oh my god.
Speaker 2 (22:12):
Oh that's my biggest fear for your own children.
Speaker 1 (22:15):
Yes, oh my god, Oh my god. Pregnant at fifteen,
that would be.
Speaker 2 (22:21):
That would be that. That's a cold splash of water.
But you know what, I want to believe that.
Speaker 1 (22:28):
But this goes back to what that guy was saying
about me, where you're just living in it. You don't
know any better. You're just you're just surviving in it.
It's not it's not real. You're just surviving in it.
I would like to and again I'm not pregnant at fifteen,
but I would just I'd like to believe you get
pregnant at fifteen. You're just living in it like it's
(22:50):
it's scary, it's all of those things. It's hard, you're broke,
you're you're you're panicked, you've unexpected maybe she maybe she
planned on it, whatever, But you're just you don't know
any different.
Speaker 2 (23:01):
You're just living in it. You have no choice.
Speaker 1 (23:07):
Hopefully and hopefully you have I was gonna say, hopefully
you have some support. By the way, now I'm envious
of her because but I think about it, she's thirty two,
her kids are out of the house, right, she's young
and living.
Speaker 3 (23:24):
Oh my goodness, there's so many people willing to share
these points in their lives, which I better difficult to
talk to. So thank you for feeling comfortable.
Speaker 2 (23:35):
You're welcome.
Speaker 5 (23:36):
Listen.
Speaker 1 (23:36):
I got fired in La. Sorry, by the way, you
didn't ask Kristen the uh oh here were when I
got to you? Uh? First book?
Speaker 2 (23:48):
Well, I ain't the butthole out of the first one?
By what was? Butthole?
Speaker 1 (23:51):
Is ring as a second one? Hi, Kristin, how are
you good?
Speaker 5 (23:56):
Go?
Speaker 3 (23:57):
Uh? What I wish it would have been? It was
twenty six, twenty seven, but it was actually twenty one
when my dad died.
Speaker 4 (24:04):
A lot of people would say death of a parent
is is you? You? You're no longer a child in
the world's eyes anymore? Maybe, or maybe in your own eyes,
you're not a child anymore.
Speaker 2 (24:16):
Like I wasn't mature. How old were you when your
dad died?
Speaker 3 (24:18):
Twenty one twenty one?
Speaker 1 (24:20):
How unexpected the you know what I wonder if unexpected
comes into play?
Speaker 4 (24:28):
Yeah, I would say that's a big part of it.
Speaker 2 (24:29):
Like I was, I was young when like not not,
I was older than Christmas.
Speaker 1 (24:33):
Was I twenty three? Maybe when my when my dad
ate it the but like I knew it was coming,
like he was definitely heading down that road. So maybe
maybe maybe the unexpected part of it would change it.
Speaker 3 (24:47):
Certainly for pregnancy it does, but you don't.
Speaker 1 (24:50):
Know that it wasn't planned to fifteen at least, I
like to get benefit of the doubt.
Speaker 3 (24:57):
But that's where for Christmas age and your age and
Diane's is too. Like I did not use that as
my example because I was twelve, Yeah right, so I was.
I was still a kid, yeah, and you were just
going through it. Well, I mean, it's havoc on the
rest of my life and turned me in case it
is the father who I am, I would say for worse,
(25:21):
but no for better or worse. But that would not
be for me when life got real because you're still
you are still a.
Speaker 2 (25:29):
Child, yeah, exactly exactly.
Speaker 3 (25:32):
It just wrecks you as an adult.
Speaker 1 (25:34):
I think maybe it recks you when you have your
own kids. I think maybe the unexpected part or at
least in my mind, because like life didn't get real
for me because my dad died, life didn't get real
for me when my brother died. Now, I was like
really young.
Speaker 3 (25:50):
Yeah yeah, but I'm happy you did throw him in there.
It had been a while.
Speaker 2 (25:57):
Yeah, I know.
Speaker 1 (25:57):
I got to remind people that my brother died of
very very young age. I mean, listen, brain cancer will
do that to you.
Speaker 5 (26:03):
Line.
Speaker 2 (26:03):
Let me go to line.
Speaker 3 (26:04):
Fourth diagnosis.
Speaker 2 (26:06):
I've said that before.
Speaker 1 (26:07):
No, no, no, oh, getting a diagnosis. You know who
that makes me think of? That's mortality. You know who
that makes me think of? Cancer? Guy?
Speaker 4 (26:15):
Yeah, the guy who was given a few months.
Speaker 1 (26:18):
I don't even think of it was a few months.
I thought it was weeks. And he's outkicked his coverage.
He's still going, by the way. I bet for him,
it's just surreal. I bet, I bet it wasn't real life.
Maybe the diagnosis day is I bet somebody says you're
gonna die of cancer or whatever.
Speaker 4 (26:33):
It is, or you've got an x amount of weeks.
Speaker 3 (26:35):
Yeah, yeah, maybe. Now the life he's living is great,
so far beyond what they said he would that may
feel surreal.
Speaker 2 (26:45):
Yeah, exactly, all right, we got it. Hi real quick?
Who is this.
Speaker 5 (26:52):
Hello?
Speaker 2 (26:52):
Okay, Hey, what's going on?
Speaker 1 (26:54):
Dude?
Speaker 2 (26:54):
Yes, sir, Yeah, I didn't.
Speaker 5 (26:58):
It didn't get real from me until I was forty one.
Speaker 2 (27:00):
What happened at forty one?
Speaker 3 (27:03):
Well, I was a.
Speaker 5 (27:04):
Bartender for twenty one years in the UH and I made.
Speaker 1 (27:08):
A ton of money right and just.
Speaker 5 (27:12):
Had everything, partied, lived in girlfriends houses and apartments, and
go to Caribbean for a month, lived in Ocean City.
Speaker 2 (27:24):
So what happened at one? Oh you got a job
there you go.
Speaker 1 (27:27):
Yeah, then all of a sudden you done, not at
a real job, exactly exactly.
Speaker 2 (27:32):
I can see that seven night Yeah, no, I can
see that.
Speaker 3 (27:35):
Yes, time one more for you.
Speaker 2 (27:37):
Oh it was planned.
Speaker 3 (27:39):
No, this is from Heather seven month coma.
Speaker 2 (27:44):
You don't even know you're in it?
Speaker 3 (27:46):
Or my son?
Speaker 1 (27:47):
Oh you know what, I'll wait till.
Speaker 2 (27:49):
You're done.
Speaker 3 (27:51):
In a car accident on life support. Oh now nineteen
years old?
Speaker 4 (27:57):
Oh my god.
Speaker 2 (27:58):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:59):
Mean that's that's that's real life. What about prisoner?
Speaker 2 (28:03):
It's still worse
Do you consider yourself like an adult?
Speaker 2 (00:05):
Though?
Speaker 3 (00:05):
Yeah, at what.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
Point were you like, okay, life got real? Probably my
time in the military.
Speaker 1 (00:15):
Oh okay, yeah, you know what that would Uh that
was the first wake up called. Was not expecting that.
Uh what what age did you go in? I was nineteen?
You were nineteen when you went in you know what? So,
(00:36):
Diane think about you. You're going to answer that question
in a moment, like at what age were you when
life got real?
Speaker 2 (00:42):
And you were like, I'm an adult?
Speaker 1 (00:44):
But it's funny because in nowhere in this this this
kind of this survey that was done, did they ever
talk to somebody in the military. So I wonder, I
wonder if that would be completely different for somebody in
the It has to be. It has to be, Diane,
at what age did quote life get real?
Speaker 4 (01:05):
I'd say, like around like god like twenty two, twenty three.
Speaker 2 (01:10):
Twenty two when you're well?
Speaker 1 (01:13):
Tell me why may be right for you.
Speaker 4 (01:16):
Paying your own bills? Like living living on your own,
You're out of college, you're working, you know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (01:24):
Were you were you paying all of your own bills?
Were you like completely independent?
Speaker 4 (01:28):
Not completely?
Speaker 2 (01:29):
Okay? So life became real when you were partially independent.
Speaker 4 (01:34):
Well, I mean, if you're gonna then.
Speaker 2 (01:35):
A little bit everybody's answer, you're entitled to your own answer.
Speaker 4 (01:38):
Thankfully, my parents were helping me.
Speaker 1 (01:40):
With HOS sweater back on. You're trying to throw me off.
Speaker 4 (01:42):
No, I'm itching.
Speaker 1 (01:43):
Oh I thought you were trying to show me some
shoulder part.
Speaker 4 (01:45):
I mean they thankfully my parents were helping me out.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
Because my right, But that's when you felt like you
were an adult, when your parents were helping you out.
Speaker 2 (01:54):
I'm not trying to paint you into a corner.
Speaker 4 (01:56):
No, because but then and now I feel like I
should reevaluate my answer. So maybe maybe there wasn't that
for me.
Speaker 2 (02:03):
But I'm just leaving on your own.
Speaker 4 (02:04):
You're out of college, you're not in like the bubble
of fun anymore. You're working, Sure, you've got bills to pay, right,
that kind of thing, all right.
Speaker 3 (02:12):
Tyler, So I agree with Diane. It was after college.
Speaker 1 (02:20):
Well, I think anybody even like, even if you didn't
go to college, it's still I don't think anybody's gonna
say nineteen.
Speaker 3 (02:28):
Oh see, I would disagree. If you didn't go to college,
life probably got pretty real after high school graduation, Like
Evan said the Well he went to the military. But
even if you didn't go to the military, you were working. Yeah,
you got you gotta pay.
Speaker 1 (02:40):
Bills like the yeah, but you know what like like
for that's me by the way, right, Like I went
to college for six weeks and then moved on, like
I was living on my own in LA. But it
didn't seem like life got real. Like I was still
flubbing to get by. I was chased, Oh, you're making
a lot of mistakes. Oh more mistake. It's been living life.
(03:01):
So that's why to me, like life did because I
didn't take it seriously. I did, but I didn't. I
couldn't do anything about it. So it was like, yeah,
I'll write fake bounce checks. Who cares?
Speaker 3 (03:10):
But so you know, I had a child at my
first child at twenty nine, But life is already real.
A bought a house at twenty seven. Life is already real.
I really, I'm with Diane. I feel like at twenty three, really,
when it came when I realized how little the starting
salary actually was, I had agreed to and I had
(03:30):
to instead of going out put gas in the car. Yeah,
sure that was eye opening, and I would say life
got very real six months into having this job.
Speaker 1 (03:42):
Okay, all right, so maybe it is. Maybe it is
that young, but that's not the national average.
Speaker 4 (03:47):
Some people might say, like, no, it got real real
when I had a kid, and then you're not only
just trying to take care of yourself. You've got a
life that you have to take care of. Or like
he said, like like making a like buying my condo,
like that was a huge thing.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (04:02):
See I didn't.
Speaker 1 (04:03):
I never owned anything until I was in my thirties.
Speaker 3 (04:09):
Yeah. Now, so yeah it would have been it was
two years before my son was born, so yeah, it'd
be twenty seven.
Speaker 2 (04:15):
Yeah, how well was I?
Speaker 1 (04:16):
But I think I was like thirty one when I
bought a house.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
Thirty two? Is that right? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (04:22):
But life had to have already been real for you.
Speaker 2 (04:25):
Yeah, I mean I guess it was. I guess it was.
Speaker 3 (04:30):
I can't believe for you, it's not even though you
were making mistakes, maybe not when you had the comfort
of Houston, but when you drove out to California. Yeah,
like life didn't know anybody.
Speaker 1 (04:43):
No, it didn't feel real, not at all, because it
was halle weird. No, Like, there were definitely elements of
it when another city had made it feel different.
Speaker 2 (04:57):
I don't know the answer to that.
Speaker 1 (04:59):
You know what I will say, when I when I
moved to Philly, life felt real.
Speaker 3 (05:04):
How old were you then? I know it was just
a couple of years ago.
Speaker 1 (05:08):
Mid twenties yeah, mid twenties.
Speaker 3 (05:11):
Okay, a decade yeah, but when maybe.
Speaker 1 (05:14):
That's when life felt real transition, Yeah, because like like listen,
in Houston, I was already living by myself.
Speaker 2 (05:22):
I already had a job.
Speaker 1 (05:24):
I had no money, but I had no money in
LA like nothing changed, so I was still responsible for
paying all my bills. But it wasn't like I was
like I had a budget, you know, you know what
my budget was? What can I how far can I
stretch it this week? So there was no budget or
planning or anything. So why aren't you saying when you
started living by yourself in high school? Because that's still
(05:46):
like that you just did, but life didn't feel like
it didn't feel like, oh crap, everything got real.
Speaker 4 (05:51):
Yeah when I graduated Radford and moved to Roanoke because
that's where I got my first job, and I was
living in an apartment by myself, you know what I mean.
And I didn't know anybody, And I mean I had
a couple of friends from school who lived there, but
it was it was like, Wow, I'm an adult.
Speaker 1 (06:09):
Most people say they feel like by the way, the
national average is twenty seven. When people say that they
start feeling and that's looking at like older generations, younger generations.
But if you take everybody and loop it together, twenty
seven twenty eight is when people feel like, oh.
Speaker 2 (06:26):
Crap, life got real.
Speaker 3 (06:29):
So that did have people looking back, and not just
those who were twenty seven answering.
Speaker 1 (06:35):
Correct, okay, and they would say and so then they
said why, and some of them did say it's when
I got my own first place to live apartment, not
not necessarily buying a house, no, my own first apartment
or renting a house or whatever. It was being fully
independent from my parents right financially they're not helping out
with anything. And listen, I know that there are still
(06:56):
people in their forties whose parents are still paying their
phone bill, and I get it, and God bless you,
you're lucky. The but where they are like that was
the age where I was one hundred independent financially from
my parents. You know what The most common one was
where they felt like they got a career job and
it wasn't just another gig gig, yeah, gig that they
(07:19):
got a job, whether it was in what they went
to college for or you like if they didn't go
to college, it was like, oh, I got I got
a job and then listen, I get there's a lot
of people that go to trade school and then and
then get their jobs. Right, But it's not just like oh,
well I'm not going to college. My mom said I
have to do something. So I'm doing I'm doing uber
eats at night and I'm doing this and then I'm
going But where you got a job where you felt
(07:40):
like this is this is a this is a job,
like this could be a career. That's where a lot
of people went like that was the moment where they
were like this is the rest of my life and
not in a bad way, but a like I'm not.
Speaker 2 (07:58):
Going to quit this job and then go work long
John Silvia.
Speaker 4 (08:01):
It's exciting when if you've chosen a field and you're
actually working in it, that you're.
Speaker 1 (08:05):
Psyched for that, even if it's not the field that
you thought it was gonna be.
Speaker 5 (08:10):
Right.
Speaker 2 (08:10):
Yeah, that's where a lot of people.
Speaker 3 (08:12):
Went from Instagram. Surprised Elliott isn't saying now with both
kids off to college, life got different. That that's an
interesting one to me. Yes, obviously it's different, But for
(08:33):
is it because life was real way before that when
they were born? But does that mean life got real
for your kids because now they're off on their own
and they're about to soon be adults in a few
years without your roof over their heads.
Speaker 2 (08:48):
Yeah, I don't know. I don't know.
Speaker 1 (08:50):
I do know that two members of the Seagull family
were out and about it two fifteen this morning. Damn
fine my life rose sixty the no, not life three sixty?
Speaker 5 (09:01):
Fine?
Speaker 2 (09:01):
Mind No, I got a text the by the way.
Speaker 3 (09:04):
Hugh, right here on X, I'll be fifty five in October.
Life is starting to get real because the kid goes
off to college next year.
Speaker 1 (09:11):
But didn't you feel like life was real when you
had to like save like every freaking penny wow, in
order to be able to send him to college.
Speaker 3 (09:21):
But then right above that, al Toyto says, nineteen, it's
very very It's all over the place.
Speaker 1 (09:27):
But why here, Like I understand why Hugh said life
got real because your kid is going away and I
guess I can wrap my head around that mindset. But
life for you got real when life for you got
real when you had a kid.
Speaker 3 (09:42):
Well, you can't tell him.
Speaker 1 (09:43):
No, I'm not telling him how to feel. But then,
but my question would be why did al toyto feel
like at nineteen life became real? Is that like when
he got his first stick and poke?
Speaker 3 (09:52):
I would assume sorr, yeah, but it does.
Speaker 1 (09:55):
Started getting my more adult movie lines.
Speaker 3 (09:59):
Some of these people point to more specific milestones. So
a career job you can apply to many people, right house,
buying kid, you can apply those two a.
Speaker 1 (10:10):
Huge portion of the population. But by the way, that
is but there's no age set to that.
Speaker 3 (10:14):
But hung Justin says life got real when I quit drinking.
And then there are some other ones that are that
are very sad to read that involved heartbreak. But it's like.
Speaker 1 (10:26):
It's like my parents died and like, all of a sudden,
now I'm responsible. Yes, like there's no I get that, Yeah,
I totally get that.
Speaker 3 (10:33):
Or unplanned pregnancy something.
Speaker 2 (10:35):
Like, oh, I totally get that.
Speaker 1 (10:36):
Could you imagine how real life would get if all
of a sudden, you're eighteen years old and you get
knocked up or you knock someone.
Speaker 4 (10:44):
Up, yeah, and then you're responsible.
Speaker 2 (10:45):
You don't think life gets real quick at that point.
I get that.
Speaker 3 (10:48):
But there's hospitalizations though.
Speaker 2 (10:50):
Okay, not everybody's got to be a downer.
Speaker 3 (10:52):
There's abuse, there's I mean, it's those stories, as heart
wrenching as they are to read here, those are more
interesting than just someone saying, yeah, I got my career
job by.
Speaker 2 (11:07):
The way, you know, you know.
Speaker 1 (11:07):
The one that really stands out in that to me, though,
is the the who was.
Speaker 2 (11:12):
It got sober?
Speaker 3 (11:14):
Hung justin?
Speaker 2 (11:15):
Oh oh, that's right.
Speaker 1 (11:15):
That's when he switched from drunk justin to hung justin,
even though I still only refer to him as drunk justice.
Speaker 3 (11:20):
Well, he wouldn't change the damn name on X.
Speaker 1 (11:22):
The no no, But I bet, I bet that that
makes total sense to me, where all of a sudden,
you you straightened yourself out. You're like, now I have
to be responsible, right, I get that, that makes total sense.
I'll like it. It was a death, okay, did that's cool?
Speaker 3 (11:42):
The A lot of these stories are not going to
be as happy as your first born.
Speaker 1 (11:49):
The no, well that's okay, what if though, like I
keep saying, like Philly like that was when I realized,
like this is like like I moved to LA.
Speaker 2 (11:59):
I was young.
Speaker 1 (12:00):
I was dumb, you know what I mean, Like I
didn't care, like it was just let's pick up and go.
Speaker 2 (12:04):
And then and by the way, I.
Speaker 1 (12:06):
Left a job in Houston too after being offered a
job in LA. When I when I had to move
to Philly, I was out of work, fired, broke, and
on my own. So maybe maybe that's what it. Maybe
that's why I say Philly because I had to get
a job. I had to get my stuff to Scott,
(12:27):
moved my crap to LA like it was easy. I mean,
I was broke, but I was already broke, so nothing changed.
Speaker 3 (12:35):
Jay says, it's more about a mindset. Young Elliott is
a good example. You can be living in a very
real adult life, but if you don't feel the weight
of it, then it's not real to you.
Speaker 1 (12:44):
That's true, And I say I'll give you that Jessica
on Facebook.
Speaker 3 (12:46):
Right, I'll be forty next year with a four year
old and life does not feel real yet.
Speaker 2 (12:53):
Also, can I can I ask?
Speaker 1 (12:55):
Can I ask you guys this?
Speaker 2 (12:56):
And then I'll grab a bunch of these.
Speaker 1 (12:58):
So they talked about people feeling financially on their own,
not set, but I'm no longer getting.
Speaker 4 (13:06):
There's supported, there's no safety net.
Speaker 1 (13:09):
Getting their first career job. Nobody was talking about death
or substance abuse or getting clean the other thing that
sticks out in here. A lot of people said that
it was and they it kind of all rolls together
of being financially independent, whether by choice or by getting
(13:33):
cut off, so being responsible for their own finances, having
a job where you're getting paid not necessarily a tremendous
amount of money, but it's not like you have a job.
And then people said, and that's when I bought life
insurance at the age of twenty eight. I don't know
(13:54):
anybody that had life Nobody that was in my circle
had life insurance at the age of twenty eight.
Speaker 4 (13:58):
Maybe if you've got kids, that's something that is suggested.
Speaker 3 (14:03):
Suggested, but to go through it, Yeah, it was a
few years before I finally got my act together and
got the insurance.
Speaker 1 (14:10):
I hate life insurance.
Speaker 2 (14:11):
To me, it's the biggest rip off, it's the biggest scam.
Speaker 4 (14:14):
Well until you're dead, right, I'll get.
Speaker 1 (14:17):
It as I'm dying, But I don't know why am
I wasting that money. Now, I hate it. I hate
it and I don't and I'm dumb about it. I
don't know anything about it. Get term, get life, get
whole life, half life, whatever. I don't know.
Speaker 3 (14:33):
A couple of people this is a happier one. A
couple of people saying cars.
Speaker 1 (14:37):
Oh, getting getting a like, getting like getting a real
car as opposed to a hand me down beater.
Speaker 2 (14:42):
Perhaps, Yeah, that makes sense, that's your first big purchase.
Speaker 4 (14:46):
Yeh.
Speaker 3 (14:46):
But here's another one. I would say. Now I'm forty
two and my daughter's graduating this.
Speaker 2 (14:51):
Year, how does that feel like it's real?
Speaker 1 (14:53):
Need? What about when she was a baby that you
can't tell people? How? I don't know, I'm not How
are you not sitting there knowing that that that the
kid's coming and not going like, holy crap, I got.
Speaker 2 (15:07):
To take care of a kid.
Speaker 1 (15:08):
Yeah, that'll sober you up, No offense, justin that'll sober you.
Speaker 3 (15:13):
Up, for sure.
Speaker 1 (15:17):
But maybe where you can't just lay on the couch
hungover eating Chinese food every Saturday.
Speaker 2 (15:23):
God damn.
Speaker 3 (15:24):
But maybe it feels surreal. That's how I describe the
home birth. Now. Granted, it felt very real the second
we right went to the hospital, after the kid was
born and came back home, We're like, wow, we have
a second child. Now I understand what you're saying there,
I feel surreal for many years.
Speaker 1 (15:43):
Yeah, probably, but not when you're forty two. Once you
had the kid. When she was forty one.
Speaker 3 (15:48):
Diane took the advice tell people they were wrong.
Speaker 1 (15:51):
This is not a right or wrong answer. No, I'm
not saying it is, but the I mean, you're taking
issue with some of the suggestions. Yeah, I just remember thinking,
what the F did I do?
Speaker 2 (16:03):
Man?
Speaker 1 (16:04):
That is expensive. You're responsible for it. I could drop
it and kill it. Like all that goes.
Speaker 2 (16:11):
Through your head.
Speaker 3 (16:11):
Jenevie says, at twenty eight, I recognized that I started
thinking more broadly and rationally. Then thought, crap, Now I'm
an adult.
Speaker 1 (16:22):
That's a good answer. That's a good answer. But do
you like it just because it's close to your twenty seven?
You said no, no, no, no, you could have told
me that, like, I mean, that's me at a younger age.
Speaker 4 (16:31):
You were thinking broadly.
Speaker 1 (16:35):
No, you're not an adult yet, but that but that is.
But that's a mindset. That is a mindset, and it
just happens to be a twenty eight but that's where
they focused in and they were like, I have to
stop thinking about more than.
Speaker 4 (16:47):
Just next week.
Speaker 1 (16:50):
Yeah, exactly, so huge. I don't even know what broadly
and rationally means. Do I think that way now? Oh?
Speaker 2 (16:57):
Go ahead.
Speaker 3 (16:58):
Hugh is explaining or elaborating on the kid going off
to college.
Speaker 2 (17:02):
Oh my god, get over it.
Speaker 3 (17:04):
What getting real to me means worrying about life's This
is going to be very deep for someone whose name
is Hugh Jinveiny, right, means worrying about life's path until
the kid goes off. I've felt impartial control of that worry.
(17:24):
He is one hundred percent right, But when she goes
that ends, Yes, one hundred percent. So if your life
has followed a very traditional arc, yes, where it's like
schooling nutsy in college, but schooling graduate, high school, whatever,
they're living under your roof, meet somebody have a child.
All of that is textbook. But so now I get
(17:48):
that answer.
Speaker 1 (17:49):
Yeah, no, he I mean I understand that answer. Life
got real, should have been real way before that. However, No, no,
but I do. I do get that.
Speaker 4 (17:56):
It's just a new phase.
Speaker 2 (17:58):
Yeah, you're not in you're not in control.
Speaker 4 (18:01):
I mean, you hope you've taught them like, don't do
stupid stuff.
Speaker 1 (18:05):
I mean, listen, as kids get older in high school,
they're running off with their friends and getting in trouble
and all that other stuff.
Speaker 2 (18:12):
But you could still hammer it down. You're gone.
Speaker 3 (18:16):
Oh, Brian's got a good one.
Speaker 2 (18:18):
Go ahead.
Speaker 3 (18:19):
So whereas we talk about maybe job a relationship children
that follows I don't want to say normal.
Speaker 1 (18:28):
No, but if it follows their typical paths, that's fine.
Speaker 3 (18:31):
The nick you makes life get real fast.
Speaker 1 (18:35):
Oh, completely disagree, Completely disagree. The both my kids were
in nick You right, both of them were in there. Right,
that falls under surreal that that that to me is surreal.
I was you know, it's it's it's emotional, It is
scary as hell, very expensive, But that's surreal like that
(18:59):
is you don't have like you don't even process that.
Speaker 2 (19:02):
That is just to me, it's completely different.
Speaker 1 (19:05):
But I may as well have been nineteen years old
living in La not knowing what the f I was doing.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
You have no.
Speaker 1 (19:11):
Idea what you're doing other than going and occasionally trying
to whisper to a nurse on the side. Are they
gonna live like it's so? To me, that was so
surreal that that wasn't real life to me.
Speaker 3 (19:23):
Again, my daughter's introduction to the world was surreal. But
for my son I went to the NICU and then
learning about his heart condition, that was pretty real. But
the thing that and this is we've talked about this.
Your placement in the nick You puts things into perspective. Yes,
and the kids that are much worse off and are
in much scarier sort of status, if you will back
(19:49):
further into the department, that changes and makes you realize, oh, okay,
this is we can get through this. And you feel
terrible for what other families are dealing with.
Speaker 1 (20:03):
Oh yeah, oh it's horrible that I liked that example,
what's that the nick you your time?
Speaker 2 (20:10):
The nick you was that's rough. Oh it's not pleasant,
but you're right.
Speaker 1 (20:16):
You feel horrible like you're sitting there with your kid
and the family next to you comes in their kids
the size of a chicken wing, and you're like, oh,
pay no attention over here.
Speaker 3 (20:26):
Right all right?
Speaker 2 (20:27):
Yeah nick you? Yeah, sorry, Nick You was sir.
Speaker 5 (20:29):
Real.
Speaker 3 (20:30):
Oh, Brian writes, they were to hell. Daughter was in
there for three months, see all right, so he hit
the ball back to you, Elliott, right, all right. Well,
at least he was going home for three months. Elliott
slammed his racket line eight.
Speaker 1 (20:48):
Hi Elliot in the morning. By the way, I feel
like this bit's like a real serious turn. I was like,
you know, like, hey, I was old enough to buy
beer with like a real id.
Speaker 2 (20:59):
I'm sorry, yes, who is this?
Speaker 5 (21:02):
Hi? Good morning guys.
Speaker 2 (21:03):
Hey, how are you.
Speaker 5 (21:05):
Good?
Speaker 1 (21:05):
Good?
Speaker 5 (21:06):
This is Corbyn from Richmond. I just want to say
life got real. Sorry, I'm changing my daughter's dipert here.
Life got real when I turned twenty three and went
to prison. That probably would do it right there.
Speaker 1 (21:17):
Oh that's a great answer. Wow, that's a great answer.
That's not surreal. No, no, no, you know what that
that is? That is sobering. That is real. Yeah, probably
the realest thing ever writ there.
Speaker 2 (21:33):
I bet that first night we met boy winter winter
chicken dinner.
Speaker 1 (21:40):
By the way, I if I went to if I
went to if I went to prison tomorrow, that's when
life gets real.
Speaker 2 (21:47):
Top of the list, top of the list. Sorry to
anybody who died or got sober or.
Speaker 1 (21:53):
Nick you, but Rachel, Rachel got pregnant at fifteen.
Speaker 2 (21:57):
That's pretty real.
Speaker 1 (21:58):
No, you know what that that's sir, and you know what,
jail still the winner. All Right, dude, I appreciate it.
Thank you, my friend. Yes, oh my god.
Speaker 2 (22:12):
Oh that's my biggest fear for your own children.
Speaker 1 (22:15):
Yes, oh my god, Oh my god. Pregnant at fifteen,
that would be.
Speaker 2 (22:21):
That would be that. That's a cold splash of water.
But you know what, I want to believe that.
Speaker 1 (22:28):
But this goes back to what that guy was saying
about me, where you're just living in it. You don't
know any better. You're just you're just surviving in it.
It's not it's not real. You're just surviving in it.
I would like to and again I'm not pregnant at fifteen,
but I would just I'd like to believe you get
pregnant at fifteen. You're just living in it like it's
(22:50):
it's scary, it's all of those things. It's hard, you're broke,
you're you're you're panicked, you've unexpected maybe she maybe she
planned on it, whatever, But you're just you don't know
any different.
Speaker 2 (23:01):
You're just living in it. You have no choice.
Speaker 1 (23:07):
Hopefully and hopefully you have I was gonna say, hopefully
you have some support. By the way, now I'm envious
of her because but I think about it, she's thirty two,
her kids are out of the house, right, she's young
and living.
Speaker 3 (23:24):
Oh my goodness, there's so many people willing to share
these points in their lives, which I better difficult to
talk to. So thank you for feeling comfortable.
Speaker 2 (23:35):
You're welcome.
Speaker 5 (23:36):
Listen.
Speaker 1 (23:36):
I got fired in La. Sorry, by the way, you
didn't ask Kristen the uh oh here were when I
got to you? Uh? First book?
Speaker 2 (23:48):
Well, I ain't the butthole out of the first one?
By what was? Butthole?
Speaker 1 (23:51):
Is ring as a second one? Hi, Kristin, how are
you good?
Speaker 5 (23:56):
Go?
Speaker 3 (23:57):
Uh? What I wish it would have been? It was
twenty six, twenty seven, but it was actually twenty one
when my dad died.
Speaker 4 (24:04):
A lot of people would say death of a parent
is is you? You? You're no longer a child in
the world's eyes anymore? Maybe, or maybe in your own eyes,
you're not a child anymore.
Speaker 2 (24:16):
Like I wasn't mature. How old were you when your
dad died?
Speaker 3 (24:18):
Twenty one twenty one?
Speaker 1 (24:20):
How unexpected the you know what I wonder if unexpected
comes into play?
Speaker 4 (24:28):
Yeah, I would say that's a big part of it.
Speaker 2 (24:29):
Like I was, I was young when like not not,
I was older than Christmas.
Speaker 1 (24:33):
Was I twenty three? Maybe when my when my dad
ate it the but like I knew it was coming,
like he was definitely heading down that road. So maybe
maybe maybe the unexpected part of it would change it.
Speaker 3 (24:47):
Certainly for pregnancy it does, but you don't.
Speaker 1 (24:50):
Know that it wasn't planned to fifteen at least, I
like to get benefit of the doubt.
Speaker 3 (24:57):
But that's where for Christmas age and your age and
Diane's is too. Like I did not use that as
my example because I was twelve, Yeah right, so I was.
I was still a kid, yeah, and you were just
going through it. Well, I mean, it's havoc on the
rest of my life and turned me in case it
is the father who I am, I would say for worse,
(25:21):
but no for better or worse. But that would not
be for me when life got real because you're still
you are still a.
Speaker 2 (25:29):
Child, yeah, exactly exactly.
Speaker 3 (25:32):
It just wrecks you as an adult.
Speaker 1 (25:34):
I think maybe it recks you when you have your
own kids. I think maybe the unexpected part or at
least in my mind, because like life didn't get real
for me because my dad died, life didn't get real
for me when my brother died. Now, I was like
really young.
Speaker 3 (25:50):
Yeah yeah, but I'm happy you did throw him in there.
It had been a while.
Speaker 2 (25:57):
Yeah, I know.
Speaker 1 (25:57):
I got to remind people that my brother died of
very very young age. I mean, listen, brain cancer will
do that to you.
Speaker 5 (26:03):
Line.
Speaker 2 (26:03):
Let me go to line.
Speaker 3 (26:04):
Fourth diagnosis.
Speaker 2 (26:06):
I've said that before.
Speaker 1 (26:07):
No, no, no, oh, getting a diagnosis. You know who
that makes me think of? That's mortality. You know who
that makes me think of? Cancer? Guy?
Speaker 4 (26:15):
Yeah, the guy who was given a few months.
Speaker 1 (26:18):
I don't even think of it was a few months.
I thought it was weeks. And he's outkicked his coverage.
He's still going, by the way. I bet for him,
it's just surreal. I bet, I bet it wasn't real life.
Maybe the diagnosis day is I bet somebody says you're
gonna die of cancer or whatever.
Speaker 4 (26:33):
It is, or you've got an x amount of weeks.
Speaker 3 (26:35):
Yeah, yeah, maybe. Now the life he's living is great,
so far beyond what they said he would that may
feel surreal.
Speaker 2 (26:45):
Yeah, exactly, all right, we got it. Hi real quick?
Who is this.
Speaker 5 (26:52):
Hello?
Speaker 2 (26:52):
Okay, Hey, what's going on?
Speaker 1 (26:54):
Dude?
Speaker 2 (26:54):
Yes, sir, Yeah, I didn't.
Speaker 5 (26:58):
It didn't get real from me until I was forty one.
Speaker 2 (27:00):
What happened at forty one?
Speaker 3 (27:03):
Well, I was a.
Speaker 5 (27:04):
Bartender for twenty one years in the UH and I made.
Speaker 1 (27:08):
A ton of money right and just.
Speaker 5 (27:12):
Had everything, partied, lived in girlfriends houses and apartments, and
go to Caribbean for a month, lived in Ocean City.
Speaker 2 (27:24):
So what happened at one? Oh you got a job
there you go.
Speaker 1 (27:27):
Yeah, then all of a sudden you done, not at
a real job, exactly exactly.
Speaker 2 (27:32):
I can see that seven night Yeah, no, I can
see that.
Speaker 3 (27:35):
Yes, time one more for you.
Speaker 2 (27:37):
Oh it was planned.
Speaker 3 (27:39):
No, this is from Heather seven month coma.
Speaker 2 (27:44):
You don't even know you're in it?
Speaker 3 (27:46):
Or my son?
Speaker 1 (27:47):
Oh you know what, I'll wait till.
Speaker 2 (27:49):
You're done.
Speaker 3 (27:51):
In a car accident on life support. Oh now nineteen
years old?
Speaker 4 (27:57):
Oh my god.
Speaker 2 (27:58):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:59):
Mean that's that's that's real life. What about prisoner?
Speaker 2 (28:03):
It's still worse
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