Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
In a single sentence, share a hilarious, memorable or just
plain insane Vegas story.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
Go one sentence.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
That's it, and some of them are so good, and
it runs the gamut of everything.
Speaker 3 (00:17):
Everything.
Speaker 1 (00:19):
So here's where I need, Christen, do me a favor.
Find me some people who have been to Vegas. Please,
And again, I don't need a long drawn out story.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
Sounds like you get one sentence in a.
Speaker 1 (00:30):
Single sentence, share a hilarious, memorable or just plain insane
Vegas story that there'll be some run ons the And
yet listen, am I gonna cut you off if you
hit a period? No?
Speaker 3 (00:45):
But I don't need a long, long story.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
Why don't you give.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
An example watching the angry scooter Elvis screaming obscenities at
the and chasing another scooter Elvis who was maniacally laughing.
Speaker 2 (00:59):
God, okay, now what is scooter Elvis?
Speaker 3 (01:03):
Guy dressed? Is Elvis on a scooter?
Speaker 2 (01:05):
Oh that's not like a known performer on the street.
Speaker 1 (01:08):
No, it's not like the the underwear Cowboy. No, this
is a guy dressed is Elvis on a scooter screaming
out another guy dressed as Elvis. And that's what I
love you get schmalty Vegas, you get high end Vegas,
you get white trash Vegas.
Speaker 2 (01:24):
We went over earlier. How I don't even know what
a sports book is. But where where are all the chapels? Oh,
the wedding chapels. We'll see like the Michael Jordan one
and right, Well.
Speaker 3 (01:34):
It's not called the Michael Jordan's one, no.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
But it's that's the one that he was famous for
getting married at.
Speaker 1 (01:38):
Right.
Speaker 2 (01:38):
Isn't that the Elvis one?
Speaker 3 (01:40):
The little white chapel. Yeah, yeah, no, you'll see it.
Speaker 2 (01:43):
You'll see it like it's it's on the strip.
Speaker 3 (01:45):
The I'm trying to is it just off? I'm trying
to remember exactly where it is.
Speaker 2 (01:52):
Let me pull up a map. Here, Uh it is?
Speaker 3 (01:57):
I mean, I know I've seen it.
Speaker 2 (02:01):
It looks like sound Las Vegas Boulevard.
Speaker 3 (02:06):
Yeah, but isn't it further down? I think it's further
down Jesus Christler.
Speaker 4 (02:14):
Well, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (02:15):
Remember, I don't know the geography at all.
Speaker 3 (02:17):
It's easy here, scroll out.
Speaker 2 (02:19):
Are there? It's between Old Vegas and the strip.
Speaker 3 (02:26):
You know what, it's right by It's right by the
Mob Museum.
Speaker 5 (02:30):
Dear God.
Speaker 3 (02:31):
Okay, so we'll see that Remember when we go to
the wind. Remember when we go to the wind. You
can't touch the cars. You want another one?
Speaker 1 (02:42):
I once strength too many vodka cranberries at excess and
later threw up in the lobby fountain at the Venetian,
to the joy of many Asian taurusts.
Speaker 3 (02:51):
I had a.
Speaker 1 (02:52):
Panic attack because I thought I was throwing up blood. Nope,
just cranberries.
Speaker 3 (02:56):
Long sentence. You want another one? Here you go.
Speaker 1 (03:03):
Tampon slipped out during a friend's bachelorette party in the
Venetian lobby after doing a sexy leg spreading dance while drunk.
Speaker 3 (03:13):
Yes, we're going to Vegas.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
Oh my god, young lady, that made my eyes water.
Speaker 3 (03:23):
Here you want another one?
Speaker 1 (03:24):
And by the way, this is the beauty of Vegas.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
I'm sorry. Is this next one from the Venetian as well?
Speaker 3 (03:28):
No, no, no, I put those two together. I put
those two together.
Speaker 1 (03:32):
Here you go, Red Elvis and Blue Elvis fist fighting
in front of the Blaggio fountains.
Speaker 2 (03:36):
Done.
Speaker 3 (03:39):
Where was this one? Hard Rock?
Speaker 1 (03:44):
I played craps with half the cast the star Trek
Voyager at the Hard Rock rolled three hard ways in
a row and ran around the table high fiving all
of them. You never know who you're going to run into.
And think of it, all the residencies that are taking place.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
Yeah, you could anybody.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
Yes, Diana and I saw Sig Freed and Roy. That's
how long it's been since Diane's been there. Here you
want another famous one? Oh wait, hold on, where is it?
Speaker 3 (04:14):
Here we go.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
I was at the nightclub on top of the Palms.
I think it was called Moon back then. This is
two thousand and six, two thousand and seven. Corey Feldman
stopped to ask me if I've seen his boy, Corey Haim.
All right, wow, okay, I said it was two thousand
and six.
Speaker 3 (04:34):
How great is that?
Speaker 1 (04:37):
That's the beauty three am Blaggio valet Twelve guys in
their late forties, each carrying a plastic flamingo God.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
Here's one from a listener. Here we go from Chris,
A violent windstorm canceled the Bolagio Fountain Show, ruining my
plans to propose outside.
Speaker 3 (04:57):
Oh Jesus Christ. Debbie Downer, that's just.
Speaker 2 (05:00):
A fun, memorable, one sentence Vegas story.
Speaker 3 (05:03):
Did they miss the hilarious I guess it is fighting. Yeah,
I got blue Elvis and red Elvis fighting. I'm high
fiving the cast of Star Trek Voyager. Oh and then
the rain came and it kind of washed out my engage.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
And the bellagio in that one was also.
Speaker 1 (05:20):
Yes, these were guys carrying plastic flamingos hell. I mentioned
the Venetian that girls tampon slipped out doing a sexy
leg games.
Speaker 3 (05:31):
Yes, yes, yes, Hi Elliott in the.
Speaker 2 (05:36):
Morning, Kristin, have you been tracking intercycles?
Speaker 6 (05:40):
Hello?
Speaker 5 (05:42):
Morning, go ahead, Hey, this is Nate Nannondale.
Speaker 7 (05:46):
I got fit by a stripper in Vegas.
Speaker 1 (05:48):
There you go, excellent, excellent, very good, thank you, thank you.
Line one, Hi Elliott the morning, Hi, what you got.
Speaker 8 (06:04):
We had a girl try to get in our hotel
room at three o'clock in the morning with her key cards.
Speaker 5 (06:10):
It was not her key card.
Speaker 3 (06:12):
It happens, it happened.
Speaker 8 (06:15):
She passed. She passed out in our doorway and her
dress was up above her sighs.
Speaker 5 (06:25):
She had nothing on.
Speaker 8 (06:27):
And my husband, my husband, he decided, you know, we
need to take this poor girl and do some bring
her in. I said, no, no, no, no, you take
her down, you take her down tairs. She exposed herself
to him to pull the elevator ride down. Apparently her
(06:48):
boyfriend had kicked her out.
Speaker 1 (06:49):
It was okay, no downer parts, no downer parts.
Speaker 2 (06:53):
In Vegas's defense, remember that happened to me in Portland, Maine.
Speaker 3 (06:57):
That is true.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
Not me falling asleep in a door, oh way, but
a larger party guest also thought that was his room,
banged on it for a while, and then laid down
right from my right.
Speaker 3 (07:08):
But did you take him downstairs? Did he expose himself
to you in the elevator?
Speaker 5 (07:11):
No?
Speaker 2 (07:12):
I was terrified.
Speaker 3 (07:13):
He guess here you go.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
I disappeared from a club I was with fifteen friends.
They found me in the casino, passed out at a
vacant craps table that I had puked.
Speaker 2 (07:22):
On from Instagram, got a lap dance by a stripper
with an ankle monitor on.
Speaker 3 (07:33):
Can I give you another strip club?
Speaker 6 (07:35):
One?
Speaker 2 (07:35):
Okay?
Speaker 1 (07:36):
Five thirty am in the strip club bathroom, negotiating with
my credit card company to raise my limit.
Speaker 6 (07:43):
In there.
Speaker 3 (07:48):
Line two, Hi.
Speaker 1 (07:49):
Elliott the morning, Hey Elliott, Yeah, Hi, who's this?
Speaker 9 (07:56):
It's Ginger?
Speaker 3 (07:57):
Yes, Ginger, what do you got for me?
Speaker 9 (08:01):
My very introverted husband being required basically to get on
stage with search solet with a diaper on. I nearly
pissed my hands.
Speaker 5 (08:13):
It was so hilarious.
Speaker 3 (08:17):
That's awesome. That's awesome, all right, very good, very good.
Thank you, ma'am. Thank you.
Speaker 2 (08:22):
Sounds like she needed the diaper line.
Speaker 3 (08:25):
Seven. Hi elliot in the morning, Good morning this mink?
Speaker 5 (08:29):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (08:29):
Hi?
Speaker 3 (08:30):
What you got?
Speaker 5 (08:31):
Hey?
Speaker 7 (08:32):
You know the circus Ola? So I had myself a
little too much a drink bar before the circus Ole
show and had about those.
Speaker 3 (08:38):
Uh, sir, great story, great story.
Speaker 6 (08:41):
I had to dumb that, but great story, sirt related
I had, No, that's great, thank you?
Speaker 2 (08:53):
Oh what you're madd He didn't call it shirt the
sole No, no, as I was gonna say, Diane as
has been docte or even broadcast. I've asked a lot
of dumb questions about Las Vegas. Yester Daley got really
angry with me, and this was during the sportsbook conversation
because I said to him, I thought Vegas was all cocktails.
(09:16):
I didn't know it was a lot of beer.
Speaker 3 (09:19):
Yeah, from I don't know what.
Speaker 10 (09:21):
Sorry, no beer here.
Speaker 1 (09:22):
No, No, it's funny that you have that perception though,
that it's all like cocktails.
Speaker 2 (09:26):
Christ and you do too.
Speaker 1 (09:28):
No, is that because is that because you think of
it as as real fancy.
Speaker 2 (09:33):
Well, like when you talk about getting free drinks in
the casinos, that's beer.
Speaker 3 (09:38):
You can get a beer.
Speaker 2 (09:39):
I thought it was mixed drinks.
Speaker 3 (09:40):
You can get mixed drinks.
Speaker 2 (09:41):
You can get anything.
Speaker 3 (09:42):
You can get wine.
Speaker 2 (09:43):
Really, I wouldn't have expected wine.
Speaker 3 (09:46):
Get whatever you want. Yeah, are you gonna stay in
here and gamble whatever?
Speaker 2 (09:51):
You give me?
Speaker 1 (09:52):
Whatever the hell you want. Now, let me bring a
little class back. I saw a guy railing some chick
on the balcony right above the heart attack grill.
Speaker 3 (10:00):
You'll see that.
Speaker 2 (10:03):
There's a lot of public sex the arm.
Speaker 1 (10:08):
Not really the lot, No, but you're going to see
the heart attack grill that you're going to see.
Speaker 3 (10:13):
When we go see uh, when we go to Old Vegas.
Hi Elliet in the morning. Yeah, Hi, who's this.
Speaker 5 (10:25):
Dustin in one?
Speaker 1 (10:29):
The second night the Okay, but I need specifics, I
need specifics.
Speaker 3 (10:34):
Oh what do you got there?
Speaker 2 (10:35):
Well, this one has a photo attached to it. We
were at the Caesar Palace pool bar for my bachelor party.
My buddy didn't think there was that much alcohol in
the pina coladas. Fast forward thirty minutes. The pool has
closed and he was getting wheeled through the lobby in
front of everyone in a chair and look photo.
Speaker 3 (11:02):
But in this face, Hold on, I gotta see it.
Speaker 2 (11:05):
I gotta see it on the screen.
Speaker 3 (11:06):
Here it comes.
Speaker 2 (11:09):
I look at the guy in the red shirt. Behind
red shirt guy is clearly in that bachelor party. Yes,
of course, the guy in the chair. I'll go with him.
Speaker 3 (11:26):
Line five, Hi Elliott the morning?
Speaker 5 (11:32):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (11:32):
Hi?
Speaker 3 (11:32):
Who's this?
Speaker 7 (11:34):
Hey?
Speaker 9 (11:34):
Is this shining from Herndon?
Speaker 3 (11:36):
What did you do so?
Speaker 9 (11:38):
Fourteen years ago? I, with maybe two days notice, dumped
my toddler and my infant on my mom when I
want a trip to Vegas from Elliot in the morning
for the iHeart Radio Music Festival.
Speaker 3 (11:50):
Oh Jesus Christ, we're kind.
Speaker 5 (11:53):
Of old in Elliott.
Speaker 9 (11:54):
But it was awesome and thank you, and you guys
are going to have such a flat I'm jealous.
Speaker 3 (11:58):
Oh yes we are. Oh yes we are. Congratulations for
winning a previous trip.
Speaker 8 (12:02):
Good for you.
Speaker 3 (12:04):
Line six, Hi Elliott the morning.
Speaker 2 (12:08):
Is this me?
Speaker 3 (12:09):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (12:09):
Hi?
Speaker 3 (12:09):
Who are you? Scott? What you got?
Speaker 7 (12:15):
Walking down old town Old Vegas?
Speaker 8 (12:18):
I got wet while I was walking down and a
girl pee while she was riding the zip.
Speaker 2 (12:22):
Line Yes, yes, does that happen a lot, Duffy, did
they warn you of that?
Speaker 3 (12:34):
I don't know that I've.
Speaker 1 (12:35):
Ever seen anybody dripping as they went down the zip line.
Speaker 2 (12:42):
Diane, you thought the booger hanging out if your nose that,
I fly was bad? If you pee on the zip line,
what does that even look like? Didn't that happen to
Jada pick As Smith? Do that girl's trip? The oh
that was over Bourbon Street though we pe.
Speaker 3 (13:04):
Down the zip line? Ziply, Hi Elliott the morning?
Speaker 5 (13:09):
Look?
Speaker 3 (13:10):
Yeah, Hi, who's this?
Speaker 7 (13:12):
Hey?
Speaker 5 (13:13):
Are you? Hey?
Speaker 3 (13:13):
Good? What can I do for you?
Speaker 5 (13:16):
So my buddy was getting a lap dance from a
midget stripper and he felt for like, feeling around in
his back pocket, and I guess he was like, well,
I'm never gonna have this experience again, so I'm not
going to stop it. She stole something from his wallet.
I guess she was looking for a credit card or
debit card or cash or something. And it turns out
(13:38):
the only thing that she stole was a Walmart gift
card that had sixteen cent.
Speaker 2 (13:47):
Yes, yes, all right, Beryl, very good, thank you, sir.
Jokes on her from Facebook. This is Shane got kicked
out of the elevator at the top of the stratosphere,
decided to find another elevator through the emergency door, got
stuck in there, and then had to walk down all
(14:08):
the flights to the bottom. I thought I was gonna die.
Speaker 3 (14:11):
Lol.
Speaker 1 (14:13):
See now this person got kicked out. I was escorted
out of the Venetian for wearing a Santa suit. What.
Speaker 3 (14:20):
I don't know. I had no idea.
Speaker 2 (14:22):
I feel like, of all the things that that would
be okay covered up? Or was he pretending that he
was hired by Well, I don't I don't know.
Speaker 1 (14:32):
Here's whatdy. I met Mark Wahlberg at Walgreens Line three, Hi,
elliot the morning with me. Yeah, yeah, who is this?
Speaker 10 (14:44):
This is Sam?
Speaker 3 (14:47):
Go ahead?
Speaker 10 (14:48):
Okay. So this was also a long time ago, celebrating
a friend's twenty first birthday. Met somebody and there's a
big group of us that we ended up crashing the
presidential suite at the Bellagio.
Speaker 3 (14:58):
Oh my god, dude, what it was? What is that?
Speaker 8 (15:02):
Swan? Real? Look like?
Speaker 10 (15:06):
It looks like a really giant, like like picture like
a penthouse New York apartment?
Speaker 3 (15:11):
Does it look like? All I can think of is
what is the what is the movie? Time? For Watner,
time for Watner, time.
Speaker 1 (15:18):
For rain Man, like the sweet that they're in in
rain Man.
Speaker 10 (15:24):
I've never don't remember, but like, like the main thing
I remember was there was like a switch on the
wall and it like raised the TV out of the
foot of the bed. Oh yes, yes, And then like
the guy who ended up getting floor us was a
total sleeves ball. So we like cleaned out the mini bar.
We were wearing the robes, we were smoking in the
big giant bath hub and using like this like gorgeous
(15:46):
platters and ashtray.
Speaker 9 (15:47):
Yes we uh.
Speaker 10 (15:49):
The only thing I regret is that we use the
disposable cameras dating me in the mini bar and we
left them behind.
Speaker 3 (15:56):
Oh damn it. That's great though, good and.
Speaker 10 (15:59):
We all cleared out before he woke up.
Speaker 3 (16:00):
Awesome, awesome, thank you? What Oh if that's us, how
great would that be?
Speaker 2 (16:07):
That'd be wild? Rusty got puked on under the zip line.
And a follow up from the Caesar's Palace bachelor party.
Oh yes, yes, I am the one in the red
shirt smoking a cigar. By the way, I noticed that
security was so cool though, to the point of helping
(16:29):
us get him into bed.
Speaker 3 (16:31):
Oh my god. Wow.
Speaker 1 (16:33):
Yeah, well they don't want the problems. No, no, they're
there to help you, hi, elliot in the morning.
Speaker 7 (16:40):
I'll try to make this quick.
Speaker 4 (16:42):
I got kicked out of the hard rock pool party
because I passed out throwing up, and they gave me
a bucket because I was thrown up, And so they
escorted me through the casino.
Speaker 7 (16:53):
Floor shirtlets with a bucket of my own vomit. And
then I took a stretched limo back to my hotel
because it is the only one about half a block away.
Speaker 2 (17:05):
Now, what was he drinking though?
Speaker 3 (17:06):
Home run? What were you drinking?
Speaker 5 (17:10):
Everything?
Speaker 7 (17:10):
I was the only one in the bachelor party that
didn't eat breakfast, so came on me.
Speaker 3 (17:16):
But no, you agree like, I don't know why. I
don't know why.
Speaker 1 (17:19):
Tyler and Kristen both have this belief that the only
thing you can get are cocktails. You could drink beer,
you can drink cocktails, you can drink champagne. It does
not matter. Man, They want you to have fun.
Speaker 7 (17:32):
I'm pretty sure I had red wine at eleven am.
Speaker 3 (17:34):
There.
Speaker 1 (17:37):
All right, very good, thank you. Yeah, now this you'll
see somebody sent this one. People just randomly passed out
drunken slot machines on the floor at the Riviera. Yes, yes,
and you're not supposed to sleep in those chairs, so
they'll nudge you and you're.
Speaker 3 (17:54):
Like, eh, I'm nine, it's good.
Speaker 2 (17:56):
I'm playing so many stories that are being sent and
involve elevators, and you'll appreciate this one because there's a
callback at the end to one of your first stories.
Got very drunk and passed out in the elevator heading
back to the room. Friend at the time had to
carry drag me back to our room, where I proceeded
to get my period all over our bed.
Speaker 3 (18:26):
I love that city.
Speaker 2 (18:29):
If you tuned in in the last ten minutes, Elliott, first,
I think you kicked it off with second story.
Speaker 1 (18:36):
A girl from the bachelorette party whose tampon fell out
in the lobby of the Venetian because she was doing
a sexy leg dance.
Speaker 3 (18:47):
Is it?
Speaker 2 (18:48):
Is it a guarantee that it's a great city. Yes,
you'll fly home with at least one of these sentences.
Speaker 1 (18:54):
Yes, it's impossible. It's impossible not to it is? Is
it is? It is such a fantastic city.
In a single sentence, share a hilarious, memorable or just
plain insane Vegas story.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
Go one sentence.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
That's it, and some of them are so good, and
it runs the gamut of everything.
Speaker 3 (00:17):
Everything.
Speaker 1 (00:19):
So here's where I need, Christen, do me a favor.
Find me some people who have been to Vegas. Please,
And again, I don't need a long drawn out story.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
Sounds like you get one sentence in a.
Speaker 1 (00:30):
Single sentence, share a hilarious, memorable or just plain insane
Vegas story that there'll be some run ons the And
yet listen, am I gonna cut you off if you
hit a period? No?
Speaker 3 (00:45):
But I don't need a long, long story.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
Why don't you give.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
An example watching the angry scooter Elvis screaming obscenities at
the and chasing another scooter Elvis who was maniacally laughing.
Speaker 2 (00:59):
God, okay, now what is scooter Elvis?
Speaker 3 (01:03):
Guy dressed? Is Elvis on a scooter?
Speaker 2 (01:05):
Oh that's not like a known performer on the street.
Speaker 1 (01:08):
No, it's not like the the underwear Cowboy. No, this
is a guy dressed is Elvis on a scooter screaming
out another guy dressed as Elvis. And that's what I
love you get schmalty Vegas, you get high end Vegas,
you get white trash Vegas.
Speaker 2 (01:24):
We went over earlier. How I don't even know what
a sports book is. But where where are all the chapels? Oh,
the wedding chapels. We'll see like the Michael Jordan one
and right, Well.
Speaker 3 (01:34):
It's not called the Michael Jordan's one, no.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
But it's that's the one that he was famous for
getting married at.
Speaker 1 (01:38):
Right.
Speaker 2 (01:38):
Isn't that the Elvis one?
Speaker 3 (01:40):
The little white chapel. Yeah, yeah, no, you'll see it.
Speaker 2 (01:43):
You'll see it like it's it's on the strip.
Speaker 3 (01:45):
The I'm trying to is it just off? I'm trying
to remember exactly where it is.
Speaker 2 (01:52):
Let me pull up a map. Here, Uh it is?
Speaker 3 (01:57):
I mean, I know I've seen it.
Speaker 2 (02:01):
It looks like sound Las Vegas Boulevard.
Speaker 3 (02:06):
Yeah, but isn't it further down? I think it's further
down Jesus Christler.
Speaker 4 (02:14):
Well, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (02:15):
Remember, I don't know the geography at all.
Speaker 3 (02:17):
It's easy here, scroll out.
Speaker 2 (02:19):
Are there? It's between Old Vegas and the strip.
Speaker 3 (02:26):
You know what, it's right by It's right by the
Mob Museum.
Speaker 5 (02:30):
Dear God.
Speaker 3 (02:31):
Okay, so we'll see that Remember when we go to
the wind. Remember when we go to the wind. You
can't touch the cars. You want another one?
Speaker 1 (02:42):
I once strength too many vodka cranberries at excess and
later threw up in the lobby fountain at the Venetian,
to the joy of many Asian taurusts.
Speaker 3 (02:51):
I had a.
Speaker 1 (02:52):
Panic attack because I thought I was throwing up blood. Nope,
just cranberries.
Speaker 3 (02:56):
Long sentence. You want another one? Here you go.
Speaker 1 (03:03):
Tampon slipped out during a friend's bachelorette party in the
Venetian lobby after doing a sexy leg spreading dance while drunk.
Speaker 3 (03:13):
Yes, we're going to Vegas.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
Oh my god, young lady, that made my eyes water.
Speaker 3 (03:23):
Here you want another one?
Speaker 1 (03:24):
And by the way, this is the beauty of Vegas.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
I'm sorry. Is this next one from the Venetian as well?
Speaker 3 (03:28):
No, no, no, I put those two together. I put
those two together.
Speaker 1 (03:32):
Here you go, Red Elvis and Blue Elvis fist fighting
in front of the Blaggio fountains.
Speaker 2 (03:36):
Done.
Speaker 3 (03:39):
Where was this one? Hard Rock?
Speaker 1 (03:44):
I played craps with half the cast the star Trek
Voyager at the Hard Rock rolled three hard ways in
a row and ran around the table high fiving all
of them. You never know who you're going to run into.
And think of it, all the residencies that are taking place.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
Yeah, you could anybody.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
Yes, Diana and I saw Sig Freed and Roy. That's
how long it's been since Diane's been there. Here you
want another famous one? Oh wait, hold on, where is it?
Speaker 3 (04:14):
Here we go.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
I was at the nightclub on top of the Palms.
I think it was called Moon back then. This is
two thousand and six, two thousand and seven. Corey Feldman
stopped to ask me if I've seen his boy, Corey Haim.
All right, wow, okay, I said it was two thousand
and six.
Speaker 3 (04:34):
How great is that?
Speaker 1 (04:37):
That's the beauty three am Blaggio valet Twelve guys in
their late forties, each carrying a plastic flamingo God.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
Here's one from a listener. Here we go from Chris,
A violent windstorm canceled the Bolagio Fountain Show, ruining my
plans to propose outside.
Speaker 3 (04:57):
Oh Jesus Christ. Debbie Downer, that's just.
Speaker 2 (05:00):
A fun, memorable, one sentence Vegas story.
Speaker 3 (05:03):
Did they miss the hilarious I guess it is fighting. Yeah,
I got blue Elvis and red Elvis fighting. I'm high
fiving the cast of Star Trek Voyager. Oh and then
the rain came and it kind of washed out my engage.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
And the bellagio in that one was also.
Speaker 1 (05:20):
Yes, these were guys carrying plastic flamingos hell. I mentioned
the Venetian that girls tampon slipped out doing a sexy
leg games.
Speaker 3 (05:31):
Yes, yes, yes, Hi Elliott in the.
Speaker 2 (05:36):
Morning, Kristin, have you been tracking intercycles?
Speaker 6 (05:40):
Hello?
Speaker 5 (05:42):
Morning, go ahead, Hey, this is Nate Nannondale.
Speaker 7 (05:46):
I got fit by a stripper in Vegas.
Speaker 1 (05:48):
There you go, excellent, excellent, very good, thank you, thank you.
Line one, Hi Elliott the morning, Hi, what you got.
Speaker 8 (06:04):
We had a girl try to get in our hotel
room at three o'clock in the morning with her key cards.
Speaker 5 (06:10):
It was not her key card.
Speaker 3 (06:12):
It happens, it happened.
Speaker 8 (06:15):
She passed. She passed out in our doorway and her
dress was up above her sighs.
Speaker 5 (06:25):
She had nothing on.
Speaker 8 (06:27):
And my husband, my husband, he decided, you know, we
need to take this poor girl and do some bring
her in. I said, no, no, no, no, you take
her down, you take her down tairs. She exposed herself
to him to pull the elevator ride down. Apparently her
(06:48):
boyfriend had kicked her out.
Speaker 1 (06:49):
It was okay, no downer parts, no downer parts.
Speaker 2 (06:53):
In Vegas's defense, remember that happened to me in Portland, Maine.
Speaker 3 (06:57):
That is true.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
Not me falling asleep in a door, oh way, but
a larger party guest also thought that was his room,
banged on it for a while, and then laid down
right from my right.
Speaker 3 (07:08):
But did you take him downstairs? Did he expose himself
to you in the elevator?
Speaker 5 (07:11):
No?
Speaker 2 (07:12):
I was terrified.
Speaker 3 (07:13):
He guess here you go.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
I disappeared from a club I was with fifteen friends.
They found me in the casino, passed out at a
vacant craps table that I had puked.
Speaker 2 (07:22):
On from Instagram, got a lap dance by a stripper
with an ankle monitor on.
Speaker 3 (07:33):
Can I give you another strip club?
Speaker 6 (07:35):
One?
Speaker 2 (07:35):
Okay?
Speaker 1 (07:36):
Five thirty am in the strip club bathroom, negotiating with
my credit card company to raise my limit.
Speaker 6 (07:43):
In there.
Speaker 3 (07:48):
Line two, Hi.
Speaker 1 (07:49):
Elliott the morning, Hey Elliott, Yeah, Hi, who's this?
Speaker 9 (07:56):
It's Ginger?
Speaker 3 (07:57):
Yes, Ginger, what do you got for me?
Speaker 9 (08:01):
My very introverted husband being required basically to get on
stage with search solet with a diaper on. I nearly
pissed my hands.
Speaker 5 (08:13):
It was so hilarious.
Speaker 3 (08:17):
That's awesome. That's awesome, all right, very good, very good.
Thank you, ma'am. Thank you.
Speaker 2 (08:22):
Sounds like she needed the diaper line.
Speaker 3 (08:25):
Seven. Hi elliot in the morning, Good morning this mink?
Speaker 5 (08:29):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (08:29):
Hi?
Speaker 3 (08:30):
What you got?
Speaker 5 (08:31):
Hey?
Speaker 7 (08:32):
You know the circus Ola? So I had myself a
little too much a drink bar before the circus Ole
show and had about those.
Speaker 3 (08:38):
Uh, sir, great story, great story.
Speaker 6 (08:41):
I had to dumb that, but great story, sirt related
I had, No, that's great, thank you?
Speaker 2 (08:53):
Oh what you're madd He didn't call it shirt the
sole No, no, as I was gonna say, Diane as
has been docte or even broadcast. I've asked a lot
of dumb questions about Las Vegas. Yester Daley got really
angry with me, and this was during the sportsbook conversation
because I said to him, I thought Vegas was all cocktails.
(09:16):
I didn't know it was a lot of beer.
Speaker 3 (09:19):
Yeah, from I don't know what.
Speaker 10 (09:21):
Sorry, no beer here.
Speaker 1 (09:22):
No, No, it's funny that you have that perception though,
that it's all like cocktails.
Speaker 2 (09:26):
Christ and you do too.
Speaker 1 (09:28):
No, is that because is that because you think of
it as as real fancy.
Speaker 2 (09:33):
Well, like when you talk about getting free drinks in
the casinos, that's beer.
Speaker 3 (09:38):
You can get a beer.
Speaker 2 (09:39):
I thought it was mixed drinks.
Speaker 3 (09:40):
You can get mixed drinks.
Speaker 2 (09:41):
You can get anything.
Speaker 3 (09:42):
You can get wine.
Speaker 2 (09:43):
Really, I wouldn't have expected wine.
Speaker 3 (09:46):
Get whatever you want. Yeah, are you gonna stay in
here and gamble whatever?
Speaker 2 (09:51):
You give me?
Speaker 1 (09:52):
Whatever the hell you want. Now, let me bring a
little class back. I saw a guy railing some chick
on the balcony right above the heart attack grill.
Speaker 3 (10:00):
You'll see that.
Speaker 2 (10:03):
There's a lot of public sex the arm.
Speaker 1 (10:08):
Not really the lot, No, but you're going to see
the heart attack grill that you're going to see.
Speaker 3 (10:13):
When we go see uh, when we go to Old Vegas.
Hi Elliet in the morning. Yeah, Hi, who's this.
Speaker 5 (10:25):
Dustin in one?
Speaker 1 (10:29):
The second night the Okay, but I need specifics, I
need specifics.
Speaker 3 (10:34):
Oh what do you got there?
Speaker 2 (10:35):
Well, this one has a photo attached to it. We
were at the Caesar Palace pool bar for my bachelor party.
My buddy didn't think there was that much alcohol in
the pina coladas. Fast forward thirty minutes. The pool has
closed and he was getting wheeled through the lobby in
front of everyone in a chair and look photo.
Speaker 3 (11:02):
But in this face, Hold on, I gotta see it.
Speaker 2 (11:05):
I gotta see it on the screen.
Speaker 3 (11:06):
Here it comes.
Speaker 2 (11:09):
I look at the guy in the red shirt. Behind
red shirt guy is clearly in that bachelor party. Yes,
of course, the guy in the chair. I'll go with him.
Speaker 3 (11:26):
Line five, Hi Elliott the morning?
Speaker 5 (11:32):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (11:32):
Hi?
Speaker 3 (11:32):
Who's this?
Speaker 7 (11:34):
Hey?
Speaker 9 (11:34):
Is this shining from Herndon?
Speaker 3 (11:36):
What did you do so?
Speaker 9 (11:38):
Fourteen years ago? I, with maybe two days notice, dumped
my toddler and my infant on my mom when I
want a trip to Vegas from Elliot in the morning
for the iHeart Radio Music Festival.
Speaker 3 (11:50):
Oh Jesus Christ, we're kind.
Speaker 5 (11:53):
Of old in Elliott.
Speaker 9 (11:54):
But it was awesome and thank you, and you guys
are going to have such a flat I'm jealous.
Speaker 3 (11:58):
Oh yes we are. Oh yes we are. Congratulations for
winning a previous trip.
Speaker 8 (12:02):
Good for you.
Speaker 3 (12:04):
Line six, Hi Elliott the morning.
Speaker 2 (12:08):
Is this me?
Speaker 3 (12:09):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (12:09):
Hi?
Speaker 3 (12:09):
Who are you? Scott? What you got?
Speaker 7 (12:15):
Walking down old town Old Vegas?
Speaker 8 (12:18):
I got wet while I was walking down and a
girl pee while she was riding the zip.
Speaker 2 (12:22):
Line Yes, yes, does that happen a lot, Duffy, did
they warn you of that?
Speaker 3 (12:34):
I don't know that I've.
Speaker 1 (12:35):
Ever seen anybody dripping as they went down the zip line.
Speaker 2 (12:42):
Diane, you thought the booger hanging out if your nose that,
I fly was bad? If you pee on the zip line,
what does that even look like? Didn't that happen to
Jada pick As Smith? Do that girl's trip? The oh
that was over Bourbon Street though we pe.
Speaker 3 (13:04):
Down the zip line? Ziply, Hi Elliott the morning?
Speaker 5 (13:09):
Look?
Speaker 3 (13:10):
Yeah, Hi, who's this?
Speaker 7 (13:12):
Hey?
Speaker 5 (13:13):
Are you? Hey?
Speaker 3 (13:13):
Good? What can I do for you?
Speaker 5 (13:16):
So my buddy was getting a lap dance from a
midget stripper and he felt for like, feeling around in
his back pocket, and I guess he was like, well,
I'm never gonna have this experience again, so I'm not
going to stop it. She stole something from his wallet.
I guess she was looking for a credit card or
debit card or cash or something. And it turns out
(13:38):
the only thing that she stole was a Walmart gift
card that had sixteen cent.
Speaker 2 (13:47):
Yes, yes, all right, Beryl, very good, thank you, sir.
Jokes on her from Facebook. This is Shane got kicked
out of the elevator at the top of the stratosphere,
decided to find another elevator through the emergency door, got
stuck in there, and then had to walk down all
(14:08):
the flights to the bottom. I thought I was gonna die.
Speaker 3 (14:11):
Lol.
Speaker 1 (14:13):
See now this person got kicked out. I was escorted
out of the Venetian for wearing a Santa suit. What.
Speaker 3 (14:20):
I don't know. I had no idea.
Speaker 2 (14:22):
I feel like, of all the things that that would
be okay covered up? Or was he pretending that he
was hired by Well, I don't I don't know.
Speaker 1 (14:32):
Here's whatdy. I met Mark Wahlberg at Walgreens Line three, Hi,
elliot the morning with me. Yeah, yeah, who is this?
Speaker 10 (14:44):
This is Sam?
Speaker 3 (14:47):
Go ahead?
Speaker 10 (14:48):
Okay. So this was also a long time ago, celebrating
a friend's twenty first birthday. Met somebody and there's a
big group of us that we ended up crashing the
presidential suite at the Bellagio.
Speaker 3 (14:58):
Oh my god, dude, what it was? What is that?
Speaker 8 (15:02):
Swan? Real? Look like?
Speaker 10 (15:06):
It looks like a really giant, like like picture like
a penthouse New York apartment?
Speaker 3 (15:11):
Does it look like? All I can think of is
what is the what is the movie? Time? For Watner,
time for Watner, time.
Speaker 1 (15:18):
For rain Man, like the sweet that they're in in
rain Man.
Speaker 10 (15:24):
I've never don't remember, but like, like the main thing
I remember was there was like a switch on the
wall and it like raised the TV out of the
foot of the bed. Oh yes, yes, And then like
the guy who ended up getting floor us was a
total sleeves ball. So we like cleaned out the mini bar.
We were wearing the robes, we were smoking in the
big giant bath hub and using like this like gorgeous
(15:46):
platters and ashtray.
Speaker 9 (15:47):
Yes we uh.
Speaker 10 (15:49):
The only thing I regret is that we use the
disposable cameras dating me in the mini bar and we
left them behind.
Speaker 3 (15:56):
Oh damn it. That's great though, good and.
Speaker 10 (15:59):
We all cleared out before he woke up.
Speaker 3 (16:00):
Awesome, awesome, thank you? What Oh if that's us, how
great would that be?
Speaker 2 (16:07):
That'd be wild? Rusty got puked on under the zip line.
And a follow up from the Caesar's Palace bachelor party.
Oh yes, yes, I am the one in the red
shirt smoking a cigar. By the way, I noticed that
security was so cool though, to the point of helping
(16:29):
us get him into bed.
Speaker 3 (16:31):
Oh my god. Wow.
Speaker 1 (16:33):
Yeah, well they don't want the problems. No, no, they're
there to help you, hi, elliot in the morning.
Speaker 7 (16:40):
I'll try to make this quick.
Speaker 4 (16:42):
I got kicked out of the hard rock pool party
because I passed out throwing up, and they gave me
a bucket because I was thrown up, And so they
escorted me through the casino.
Speaker 7 (16:53):
Floor shirtlets with a bucket of my own vomit. And
then I took a stretched limo back to my hotel
because it is the only one about half a block away.
Speaker 2 (17:05):
Now, what was he drinking though?
Speaker 3 (17:06):
Home run? What were you drinking?
Speaker 5 (17:10):
Everything?
Speaker 7 (17:10):
I was the only one in the bachelor party that
didn't eat breakfast, so came on me.
Speaker 3 (17:16):
But no, you agree like, I don't know why. I
don't know why.
Speaker 1 (17:19):
Tyler and Kristen both have this belief that the only
thing you can get are cocktails. You could drink beer,
you can drink cocktails, you can drink champagne. It does
not matter. Man, They want you to have fun.
Speaker 7 (17:32):
I'm pretty sure I had red wine at eleven am.
Speaker 3 (17:34):
There.
Speaker 1 (17:37):
All right, very good, thank you. Yeah, now this you'll
see somebody sent this one. People just randomly passed out
drunken slot machines on the floor at the Riviera. Yes, yes,
and you're not supposed to sleep in those chairs, so
they'll nudge you and you're.
Speaker 3 (17:54):
Like, eh, I'm nine, it's good.
Speaker 2 (17:56):
I'm playing so many stories that are being sent and
involve elevators, and you'll appreciate this one because there's a
callback at the end to one of your first stories.
Got very drunk and passed out in the elevator heading
back to the room. Friend at the time had to
carry drag me back to our room, where I proceeded
to get my period all over our bed.
Speaker 3 (18:26):
I love that city.
Speaker 2 (18:29):
If you tuned in in the last ten minutes, Elliott, first,
I think you kicked it off with second story.
Speaker 1 (18:36):
A girl from the bachelorette party whose tampon fell out
in the lobby of the Venetian because she was doing
a sexy leg dance.
Speaker 3 (18:47):
Is it?
Speaker 2 (18:48):
Is it a guarantee that it's a great city. Yes,
you'll fly home with at least one of these sentences.
Speaker 1 (18:54):
Yes, it's impossible. It's impossible not to it is? Is
it is? It is such a fantastic city.
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