December 5, 2025 • 46 mins
The latest episode of The Nutters Club, hosted by Hamish Williams and psychotherapist Kyle McDonald, focused on the challenges the festive season can pose to mental health. The show explored how the holidays, while often joyful, can also bring stress, financial strain, and relationship tensions.
The hosts emphasised the importance of planning ahead to manage the season’s unique pressures. They discussed strategies for handling the abundance of food, alcohol, and social events, which can sometimes lead to overindulgence or trigger past addictions. Kyle suggested setting boundaries, such as deciding on a cut-off time for events or driving to ensure moderation. He also highlighted the importance of maintaining routines like exercise, sleep, and healthy eating to support mental well-being.
Listeners shared their personal experiences, with Marie expressing how Christmas can feel overwhelming due to financial struggles and family dynamics. She shared her sadness about missing her son, who is overseas, and the challenges of managing holiday expectations. Hamish and Carl offered advice on focusing on meaningful gestures, such as writing heartfelt Christmas cards, rather than expensive gifts.
Another caller, Karen, shared her creative approach to gift-giving, emphasising homemade presents like baked goods and crafts. She highlighted how gifts made with love and care can be more meaningful than costly items.
Neil, another listener, echoed this sentiment, sharing his tradition of writing personal notes to his family members, expressing admiration and love.
The show also touched on the complexities of family relationships during the holidays. A listener named Matt shared his struggle with spending Christmas alone after a difficult situation involving his ex-wife and her new partner. Kyle advised setting boundaries and communicating needs clearly to navigate such challenges.
In a heartwarming moment, a listener named Kate from Christchurch offered to donate her late brother’s mobility scooter to Steve, a caller struggling with emphysema and financial difficulties. The hosts and audience rallied to find a way to transport the scooter from Christchurch to Auckland, showcasing the spirit of generosity and community that defines the holiday season.
The episode concluded with a reminder to prioritise mental health during the holidays, embrace meaningful connections, and focus on the joy of giving from the heart.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:08):
You're listening to a podcast from News Talk said B.
Follow this and our wide range of podcasts now on iHeartRadio.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Greetings and welcome. I'm Hamish Williams and you're listening to
the podcast version of The Nuns Club, a radio show
about mental health broadcast weekly on news Talk seed B.
Each week we talk about mental health experiences and the
hope that it might help you with your own. The
show is broadcast live on Sunday nights on News Talk
(00:40):
seed B right across New Zealand and around the world.
This week, we talked about how the festive season can
impact our mental health and what to be aware of
to make sure you get the most out of it
and it doesn't take it out of you. Topics we
focused on were around the impact of drinking and food,
the financial demands, and balancing the trickiest part of all,
(01:04):
the relationships with friends and family. Don't forget, though, there's
always space for a little Christmas magic. Let us know
what you think, as well as what you learn from
our chat on any of our social media platforms. Just
search for The Nutter's Club n Z. Let's get into
this week's episode. I kind of wanted to take tonight
(01:26):
to talk a bit about Christmas. Okay, okay, because tomorrow
is officially the countdown right first of December, it is.
Speaker 3 (01:33):
Yeah, yeah, So that all happens. You start the old
edvib calendar, n't you. If you've got those yep, yep,
you can. You can start playing the Christmas carols, you
should have the Christmas tree.
Speaker 2 (01:42):
Up for all of that. But ultimately, when it comes
to Christmas, as we well know, there's a whole bunch
of unique challenges that come with this time of the year,
and not all of them are particularly good for our
mental health. And so tonight I thought that we could
actually talk through what some of those things are and
(02:03):
find out some of the ways that we can best
create a plan to be able to survive the season,
if you like, because invariably it's a really really hard
time as well for so many different people, for so
many different reasons. So look, you know, for a start,
when it comes to Christmas time, Kong, you know, you start,
the calendar gets quite full, and there's all these sort
(02:24):
of Christmas parties that people want to have or catch ups, right,
and inevitably you end up finding that there's two things
that go with us a lot of eating and sometimes
a lot of drinking.
Speaker 3 (02:36):
Yeah, and sometimes even some drug use around the edges
for people who may socialize in that manner as well. So,
I mean it's one of those times of year. You know,
having worked many years in various addictions services, it's a
tricky one because it is there's an expectation that alcohol's
kind of involved at this time of year, and as
(02:56):
you say, often overdoing it in general is you know,
considered normal. I think they're really important thing and that's
why I think, you know, it's really great we're talking
about this tonight. Actually right at the beginning of December.
It's really important to have a plan to actually decide
upon what's a structure. Well, you know, what are these
events that I'm going to have to tackle. What are
(03:18):
the parties where you know, maybe in the past I've
over done it or you know, particularly it's a professional environment,
do I need to think about being a little bit careful?
But moreover, how do you also keep on track with
all those really boring things we talk about, making sure
you're still getting enough sleep, still eating well, and you know,
getting enough exercise, keeping up those exercise routines as well.
Speaker 2 (03:41):
Oh, come on, what's the holidays, Kyle? It's Christmas time?
Do I still have to go to the gym?
Speaker 3 (03:45):
Yeah, well you don't have to go to the gym,
but you know you can go for a walk on
the beach, go for a swim, you know, still keeping
active in some way, even if you're away from your
home base, away from the gym, still make sure that
you're getting out every day and doing something active, because
it's those things that actually can really start to particularly
if we've had difficulties with alcohol and drugs in the past,
(04:06):
where we could just sort of slide back into those
bad habits quite easily at this time of year, because
there's so many opportunities, right.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
Sure, and there's so many people sort of saying, oh,
you know, you just have another one, have another one.
All that sort of stuff, right, that's reasonably normal, and some.
Speaker 3 (04:21):
Of the structures you can put in place are often
quite simple. But that's really about making that commitment beforehand.
So for instance, making sure that perhaps you said at
leaving time and you know, some people choose to drive
so they know they have to drive home. You know,
not a great one if you've had issues with that
in the past. But some people find that a really
useful way to put that stop in place. You know, most,
(04:43):
I think most responsible organizations these days have some kind
of zero alcohol alternatives and maybe buddy up. You know,
if there are people in your workplace or people that
you know who are also wanting to keep a lit
on things or maybe don't drink at all as well,
make sure you check in with them and sort of
keep make sure you can keep you both both of
you on track.
Speaker 2 (05:04):
I reckon the idea of having a cutoff time is
a really good one. I think. So it's a good
one because the things can drag on forever. Right, So
you say, look, you know, I'm going to go at
eight thirty nine o'clock. And here's the thing. Here's the thing.
People at Christmas time, you can always use the excuse
got to pick up some family who are coming flying
in early in the morning.
Speaker 3 (05:20):
There you go. My number of times I've used my
kids as an excuse over the years. Yeah, it's a
great excuse for Look, I've got to I've got to
go home. I'm going to help help get the kids
to bed. Yeah, right, you know, I don't like it
when I'm not there. It's not entirely true, but it's
always a good way to have something that people can
feel comfortable about why you're leaving.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
Kids need to be the right age to do that.
I don't think I could pull that off of my bay.
It definitely does have a shelf life. Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay,
So having a plan is really good when it comes
to just making sure that you're being responsible and also too,
you know, obviously not being rude.
Speaker 3 (05:54):
Yeah, and look, if you have had problems with addiction
in the past, this is a really good time a
year to up those supports. So if you're an AA member,
if you go along to AA for your support or NA,
it's a great time. You had to go to a
few extra meetings if you fe're really feeling that pressure,
or you know, make sure that you keep up your
counseling and therapy sessions right up to the Christmas break.
(06:14):
Whatever works for you.
Speaker 2 (06:15):
And like we've always said, and you knocked it out
of the park, Kile when you said, it's also to
making sure you enough sleep, making sure you get the exercise,
and yeah, okay, there can be lots of food, but
sometimes it's that really rich stuff which you know doesn't
necessarily make you feel one hundred percent. So do yourself
a favor, go for a nice walk, do the world
of good. Let's go to the lines, Marie. Good evening to.
Speaker 4 (06:37):
You, Oh, good evening. Guys. Just wanted to share a
little bit about Christmas.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
Yeah, go for it.
Speaker 4 (06:44):
Sorry, I've got a kirky voice. I've had a bad cold,
so I hope you can hear me.
Speaker 2 (06:49):
Okay, I can hear you. Find it. It sounds kind
of like husky and a little mysterious. I like it,
thank you.
Speaker 5 (06:56):
That's jud me up.
Speaker 4 (06:57):
No, I find Christmas very what's the word overwhelming sometimes
because it's the advertisers being happy, happy, but not everybody
is happy, heap. I was brought up in a loving family,
and I always thought when I had my children that
we'd all get together like my family did. But it
doesn't quite work like that because you have other family,
(07:20):
new members coming, and sometimes they complicate things and always
it gets all broken up. So that's sort of It's
not always great. And one of my sons is away
overseas anyway, so I'm missym terribly at Christmas this year. Anyway,
He'll be back next year, and then financially things go wrong.
(07:42):
So advertising on TV is are all about buying, but
sometimes you can't buy what you wish to buy. For family,
because we've had a car breakdown and that's that needs
a new motor and that's we can't get one, so
it's going to be thrown away basically the car. That's
kind of sad at Christmas. Yeah, and then our little
(08:05):
dog last Sunday and he passed away with us.
Speaker 2 (08:09):
Oh no, I'm sorry to hear that.
Speaker 4 (08:11):
So that was really sad. That she's bounced back. So
I'm really happy about that.
Speaker 2 (08:14):
It's a Christmas miracle.
Speaker 4 (08:16):
Yes, she's really bright, she's she's a real little fighter.
Speaker 2 (08:20):
Lots of dog's names.
Speaker 4 (08:23):
Her name's Lily Ellen.
Speaker 2 (08:24):
Lily Ellen, well done, Lily.
Speaker 4 (08:27):
She's a little just a little up Jeck Russell sots.
Speaker 6 (08:32):
Yeah, they are.
Speaker 4 (08:33):
She's so intelligent and we thought we were going to
lose her, but no, she bounced back, so we really
rapped about that. Yeah, so that was sad, but it's
good now. So I just I don't know if other
people get overwhelmed at Christmas.
Speaker 2 (08:50):
Absolutely, you're not alone, Marie. You're not alone at all.
And some of the things that you've talked about there.
You know, we wanted to touch on tonight as well,
especially when it comes to that financial strain that people
can get put under, and obviously a lot of it's
are around you know, the gifts, right.
Speaker 4 (09:07):
It is it can be yes, and you want to
give gifts, see what like you used to when you
get a bit of a struggle, you can't and you
feel like you're letting everybody down and you feel isolated.
Speaker 2 (09:20):
Well, I'll tell you what. We've got a bit of
an idea around the gift giving thing as actually when
it comes to buying the gifts, and I get it.
You know, it's nice to buy something nice to someone
and I've put some thought into it and I've gone
and spent money, my money on it, but you know,
to to sort of show how much you know, I value.
But here's the thing is that I think gifts can
(09:41):
come and go. But you know, often something we say
is people don't always remember the detail of things, but
they do remember how you made them feel. Okay, right,
So right where I'm going to with this, try this
for an idea. Don't worry about the gift in terms
of you know, I'm going to buy you a nice vase,
(10:01):
don't worry about the physical gift, worry about the Christmas card.
And in fact that's true, I would say just leave
the gift out. I would much rather that Marie sends
me a Christmas card and says, Hamish, this is what
I value about you most, and and actually take the
(10:24):
time to fill in that card. And you don't even
have to say Merry Christmas. You just you say it
with compliments about that person, about what it is that
you think you value about them, and what you think
of their greatest traits. Right, and then because remember you
always have to sign important documents, don't you, So you
(10:48):
sign this at the bottom and then and then you
send it to the person. Now, how do you think
that's going to make somebody feel when they open that
envelope and read.
Speaker 4 (10:58):
That, Oh really really good it really is.
Speaker 2 (11:03):
Now what did it cost you to do that? Exactly?
Some time, some time, some thought, and and that person
will always remember, They'll remember the card they got from Marie.
Speaker 4 (11:17):
Oh that sounds cool.
Speaker 2 (11:19):
You know. I would much rather have that that turn
up than a than a new vase.
Speaker 4 (11:25):
Oh you guys are call I listen to you every week,
and I think you're all great and all the call
of it, call in.
Speaker 2 (11:32):
Yeah, well you're one of them, Marie, so we think
you're great too. So you know, that's exactly how we
do this on the show.
Speaker 4 (11:40):
Oh it's lovely.
Speaker 2 (11:41):
Thank you so much, No, thank you for calling, lovely for.
Speaker 4 (11:43):
Chat you too, think you goud?
Speaker 2 (11:46):
Okay, Well Christmas, Merry Christmas. So that's the idea. Yeah,
I think it's a great idea. I think the other
thing too, with regards to money in general, particularly in families,
is I think it's never too early to start having frank, honest,
grounded conversations with your family and particularly with your kids
(12:06):
about money. You know, you don't need to freak them out,
make them, you know, worried about money, but actually it's
about being realistic and saying, well, this is what we
can afford, or this is what's come up this year,
or this is what we're you know, this is the
resources that we have for this Christmas, and how are
we going to think about this together? Because I think,
particularly with families, a lot of times the disappointments and
(12:27):
expectations around money happen because we aren't actually able to communate,
communicate clearly and directly in a way that works with
each other. Yeah, I mean I can understand where when
it comes to kids, you know, writing a nice Christmas
card may not probably cut it. Yeah, because kids have
different expectations, right of course. Yeah, so you know it
can be different different things that you can do.
Speaker 3 (12:48):
Never underestimate children's ability to actually understand if you give
them the facts.
Speaker 2 (12:53):
Okay, so have those of course.
Speaker 3 (12:56):
Doing that in an age appropriate way, but actually talking
to them about you know, well, this is how much
money we have for Christmas, and this is our budget
for things, and this is how we're going to think
about it together.
Speaker 2 (13:06):
And you can even make the point that you know,
we don't have a lot, but we're still going to
give you something special because you're special to us.
Speaker 3 (13:13):
That's it.
Speaker 2 (13:14):
Just do the communication thing. Don't leave anything to people wondering,
because it's often you know, in the absence of information,
people make up their own stories, right, absolutely, and so
you're actually better just to be honest and have that chat.
I like it, Kyl. Good evening to you, Karen.
Speaker 6 (13:33):
Oh hi, how's it going?
Speaker 2 (13:34):
Yeah, good good. How are you getting all ready for Christmas?
Speaker 4 (13:38):
Yes?
Speaker 6 (13:39):
Yes, just slowly yep. Now I wanted to talk about
Christmas gifts, and I'm a person that is making and
I often give a lot of Christmas gifts, but a
lot of them are made. So I will, you know,
my wonderful mechanic and new len will get Sometimes we'll
(14:00):
get a Christmas pudding made by me my family. Sometimes
Christmas cakes that I make. I make them all and
I give them away to family for Christmas gifts and
friends as well. And also sometimes you know, because I'm
on a benefit, so you know, I can't give I
can't spend a lot of money. But even just giving
things like like special hand cree not handcres, hand.
Speaker 7 (14:25):
Soap and stuff like that.
Speaker 6 (14:28):
Just giving simple gifts. It's not something it's sometimes people
like to open something at Christmas. And it doesn't have
to be expensive because a lot of the time you
get gifts that is like, oh.
Speaker 4 (14:39):
What am I going to do with that?
Speaker 2 (14:40):
You know?
Speaker 6 (14:41):
But if you give practical things, and this is what
the thing is is, people get gifts that they don't want,
you know. But if you give things like hand hand soap,
things that people use, you know, I mean, you know,
I love that.
Speaker 3 (14:55):
My My eldest daughter, who was thirteen last Christmas, she
really wanted to give everyone in our family a gift,
which is quite a task and we actually don't usually
do that. So what she decided to do was to
make Christmas.
Speaker 8 (15:07):
Cookies, you know, little There was one or two cookies
for each person, and some of them had you know,
she put icing on them with the letters of their
name and then all sorts, you know, took real some
time with them, and I reckon they were everyone's favorite gift.
Speaker 7 (15:21):
Actually, yeah, well.
Speaker 6 (15:22):
My brother loves my cinnamon and sutia cookies for Christmas.
Nice nice thing I do about fearful batches and give
them out to friends that my brother loves my cinnamon
and sultana biscuits, and so give him a bat for
Christmas as well, So you know what I mean. You know,
I don't have to spend a lot of money. Sometimes
it's just time.
Speaker 5 (15:41):
It's just you know, time and.
Speaker 6 (15:45):
Cook with love, you know, made with love.
Speaker 1 (15:48):
You know.
Speaker 2 (15:49):
Well, Karen, tyme, time is the most valuable thing that
we have and for you to give your time to
do that, you know, baking is one of the best
buddy gifts you can get anyway. But Karen, tell me this,
we do give the baking. How do you feel about.
Speaker 6 (16:05):
It oh great, because I haven't spent a lot of money.
And when you give your friends or your family their
favorite baking gifts, it lights up their face. So you've
given the right gift. It might not last for forever,
it might last for a day or two, but you know,
I mean, that's the whole idea of Christmas is giving
(16:27):
from your heart. It's not necessarily what something costs or
you know, or the best gift. It comes from the heart.
So when you cook things with love, people see that,
and that goes a lot further than, you know, than
just buying something expensive. And if people start to think
about what they can do and love. I mean, it's
not just food. You can make baskets, you can do
(16:50):
up and crafts and make things, you know, or weaving.
You know, there's lots of things like macrame you can do,
like those hanging mccrome things that you put pots and
pots of plants, and there's lots of things people can
do that you can make and spend time doing rather
than spending money. Because money is hard to come by
(17:14):
these days, so you know, a lot of people are struggling,
and you know, so it's really really hard sometimes, but
just finding those, you know, those meaningful gifts that people
really enjoy is most important when it comes to giving
gifts for Christmas.
Speaker 2 (17:29):
Karen, you have absolutely nailed it. And who would be
so lucky as to get a gift from you? Is
what I will saying.
Speaker 6 (17:37):
You know, Christmas pudding and homemade Christmas cake, you know,
and it's my family can enjoy those. Some of my
family do. Others like the biscuits, so you know, and
my mechanic loves as he does for.
Speaker 2 (17:52):
The whole homemade. I mean, this is so creative. I
love I love where you've gone with us, Karen, So yeah,
good on you. You're doing great.
Speaker 6 (18:01):
I would hope, I would hope the listeners will take
something from it, and you know, so that you know
that they can gain something better rather than spending money.
You know, It's like, it's not the money side of things,
it's the heart that's where it comes from the heart.
And if you've spent time making something for someone in
a day, wow, you know amazing. It might be last
(18:23):
to day, but it's still.
Speaker 5 (18:24):
The heart, you know.
Speaker 2 (18:26):
Yeah, well you'd be lucky in my household, you see,
I don't have that much of a sweet tooth. So
if you were to give me some biscuits, I'd say
thank you so much, and I'd just think, oh, you know,
I'll just work my way through those over the next
week or two.
Speaker 6 (18:37):
I would probably if people another sweet to that, I
would probably look at a Christmas pudding or half a
Christmas pudding, because I make up I'm actually you know what.
I make my Christmas puddings in the slow cooker.
Speaker 2 (18:48):
On the slow cooker, oh fantastic.
Speaker 6 (18:51):
Eighteenth an hour, so it's very cheap to make. So
it's actually cheaper to the ingredients cost more than the
actual cooking time. So if you make it in a
slow cooker, you will save so much money.
Speaker 2 (19:03):
Well that is obviously you know exactly what you're doing.
Follow Karen for more than cooking tips. Now, what I
was going to say Karen is like, you know, I
might work my way through the vickies quickly. That would
be my plan, but my stink and family would eat
all of them within the day. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (19:22):
I really regret the fact that my kids tall enough
now to've reached the top shelf that's where always to
hide things.
Speaker 2 (19:28):
Two teenagers, two teenagers and my wife, of whom I
will say I do all love them dearly, but sweet
stuff in our house just it just goes.
Speaker 3 (19:39):
Sounds like you need a small safe for Christmas.
Speaker 2 (19:43):
I have been known to hide things to keep them
away from them. This is what has to be done.
Great texts just came in said, absolutely loved Karen's call,
made my day perfect. I agree.
Speaker 3 (19:58):
And you know what it is about the feeling that
you put into baking. I totally agree with that, and
that's from Kelly the bloke. But here's the thing that
Karen was actually summarizing was and why I asked her
how did she feel about it? Was doing these things,
actually going through the process of making something for somebody else,
not buying something, making something. The mental health impact is
(20:19):
that it actually makes you feel good too. Yeah, because
there's a process and all sorts of personalize. You think
about the person, what you know they might like, so
you know you're personalizing it right from the get go.
Speaker 2 (20:30):
It's like a win win. What does this say, two
bottles of sav blanc, two zoppocne daily, twenty years of bliss.
Go figure.
Speaker 3 (20:42):
I'm not sure that's a great recipe for Christmas.
Speaker 2 (20:45):
No, No, I'd probably have to be a little bit
careful on that one have a chat to a medical
professional before taking the diagnosis or the medication.
Speaker 3 (20:55):
Although having said that, I mean, you know, in all seriousness,
it is a good time to check in with your
GP about medication because some people do find that actually
they may need a little bit of what we call
extra pre which is essentially medication you can use when
required for anxiety. Okay, so that includes things like sleeping
medications or other medications that people used to decrease anxiety.
(21:18):
So you know, embrace all the solutions, but just do
it safely.
Speaker 4 (21:21):
People.
Speaker 2 (21:23):
This is from Jay and East that just says, hi,
girls and guys. We've never rung you or text you
until now, but there is one thing sure is that
we always listen to you each Sunday night. Keep up
the great show and also don't forget to tell us
the rugby score. Well actually I can tell you now.
The score is. It's half time for fig and New
Zealand and the sevens and New Zealand and fourteen NICEG seven,
(21:49):
So you go, it's not too bad. This text from
Matt says Evening Team, congratulations on the award. You deserve it. Well,
thank you. I don't like Christmas this year is especially difficult.
Ever since we divorced, my ex wife's family invited me over.
Since both of us were single, it was okay ish.
Now she's wanting to bring her current boyfriend along. I
(22:11):
don't like him at all. She thinks we would be
great friends. I, on the other hand, don't like him
at all. So I will be spending this holiday alone.
Christmas this year has been canceled. I'd much rather work
relationships at Christmas time. Yeah, can get really difficult, right
they can. Yeah, especially if you've got family. Obviously, this
(22:34):
one's relationships involved. So Kyle, when it comes to this,
because you know, you don't get to choose your family,
you know, and you try your best to choose good friends.
What's a good rule of thumb to be able to
apply it, to make sure that you know, we're actually
a looking after ourselves, to actually make sure that we
preserve our mental health, but also too at the same
(22:56):
time that tricky thing sometimes having to be considerate of
other people as well.
Speaker 5 (23:01):
Well.
Speaker 3 (23:01):
I actually think on face failure, I think the Texas
solution is not a bad one. If you can just work,
then you can do that. I think the important thing
is to make sure that you have some kind of
time off that's special to you at another time so
you're not completely missing out. But juggling those kinds of
separations is really hard. I mean, you know, that's why
you know, most parenting agreements actually have these are advised
(23:21):
to have these things spelt out because this is where
the arguments flare up. So don't be you know, I
think one of the things is to really embrace a
different day, is a Christmas with separated families, to make
sure that you still do that in a way that's special.
But also I mean, I think a lot of times
that these things come down to us being able to
(23:42):
figure out what our boundaries are. First, they actually start
with your side of the street, what do you need,
what's going to work for you? And then what's the
most effective way to try and communicate that to the
people that you need to communicate it to. So it
may be that actually there are people in your family
you don't want to see at Christmas time, and you
have a right to make that choice. There's no have tos.
The hard part, of course, is then how you go
(24:03):
about communicating that. But I think if we start from
a really honest place of what do I want? How
can I take responsibility for my side of the street
and then figure out some ways to put that into action,
Which is again, why are we're talking about this now,
because actually there's enough time to make a plan potentially
and put that plan in action.
Speaker 2 (24:21):
Yeah. The one I've exercised, especially if you know you
might have family members, you know, you know that there
might be a tricky conversation, is actually having some some
what i'd call you know, you get out of jail
free lines to use. So if you know, suddenly somebody
wants to talk about something that perhaps you don't want
to talk about, how about them sevens? Eh? Well, I
(24:42):
mean I'd be happy to talk about the Sevens to
be honest, but you know, for some people who may
not know about the rugby, that could be a difficult challenge.
But it's about having the line absolutely that you have
and you and I mean it can be as simple
as just saying I think that's a conversation for another day.
Nice something like that.
Speaker 3 (25:02):
So again, boundaries, right, taking responsibility for.
Speaker 2 (25:04):
What we can do? Yeah, absolutely. Hey, look I got
an other text here about Karen. It just says just
to say I love Karen's idea of homemade gifts of
cakes puddings, and another idea I love to give is
flowers out of our garden. So Albie talks about that
now and tie up with a pretty ribbon and sometimes
(25:24):
I sprinkle glitter on them. I love your idea of
rritning a nice card up for someone that will mean
more than a presy. You've both given me a real
lift and so love your shows. Every Sunday night Hubby
always says you have the nutters tonight as he watches TV.
He still encourages me to listen, and I always remember,
totally love your show, Marie and Sorry Marie and Lily
the Little Jack Russell. She always has one eye listening.
Speaker 3 (25:47):
Wo you lovely text?
Speaker 7 (25:48):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (25:48):
Very nice, So Cole, how does one explain to children
that Santa is short of money this year? Speaking of Santa,
is it still okay to guests like children into believing
he is real? How advisable is it nowadays to use
the threat of a lump of coal from Santa to
control kids behavior and what other unintended consequences might come
(26:10):
from the center tradition, the gas lighting is often justified
as necessary to creating the magic and wonder it brings
to small children, but do the pros really aren't weigh
the cons. Are there any listeners out there who are
not deceived into believing in Center? And if so, do
any of them feel they missed out or anything? The
mental health implications of Center. I've never really thought about
(26:33):
this guy. It's a good text. It is a great text.
Thank you for it.
Speaker 3 (26:36):
It's one of those things that makes me chuckle sometimes
because it's one of those things people write to call
them on. You know, are you lying to your child
if you tell them that Santa is real?
Speaker 2 (26:43):
And the thing is is it?
Speaker 3 (26:44):
Actually it's actually about understanding child development a little bit.
So it's about recognizing that actually children are still in
that place of play and magic and wonder And what
tend Stamp and you talk to most parents is kids
naturally come to an age where they figure it out themselves,
because they start to move out of that imaginary play
child space and kind of figure it out. What we
(27:08):
did and this worked quite well, And actually it started
for a completely selfish reason was even when the kids
were very little, we had Santa presents, But then we
also had a present that was from Mum and dad
and Mum and Dad always picked the best present.
Speaker 2 (27:26):
Ah. So basically it was like, yeah, screw you, Sandy,
You're not taking all the credit. Absolutely, I have felt
this way before. Actually yeah, and so we actually did
that and it worked quite well.
Speaker 3 (27:36):
Because what it also meant was that actually it started
a conversation about gift giving that was separate from the
whole Santa Malachy and one of the tricks that my
lovely partner did very well, particularly when the kids were little.
And this is another one just for those of you
out there listening, especially really little kids. They liked the
(27:57):
opening as much as they liked the things. Often and
so if you buy a three pack of socks, wrap
each pear separately, right, spend a bit more on the
wrapping paper. But actually it does give that sense of
you know, actually there's a lot of fun things to unwrap,
particularly with little kids, which is not about the money then,
(28:19):
it's actually just about the fun of the process.
Speaker 2 (28:21):
Okay. The question in there though, that I thought was
really interesting is how do you explain to kids that
Santa doesn't have a lot of money this year.
Speaker 3 (28:28):
Well, I think that's coming back round to what I
was saying that actually it's about Santa having some presence
and Mum and Dad having some presents, and actually it's
about recognizing that everyone around the world is a bit
tight this year, and so things are spread a bit thin,
and so Senta's had to spread his resources a bit
further this year. And actually, again I think being able
(28:51):
to make things fun and engaging, you know, wrapping things
up more or you know, making sure there's a few
extra special little things that might be you know, not
particularly expensive, but wrapped well and you can make a
big fuss of them, is actually about with little kids,
is about the fun and the process. Right, If they're
old enough to understand the concept of money and money
(29:15):
being a bit tight, then I think they're old enough
to have that conversation. Like I said, don't underestimate their
ability to understand these things. And you know, I think
it's never too early to start talking about money. I
know the Center thing is a complicated one, right, but
I think again, if you're actually having some presence from
Center and some presence from the parents, then I think
(29:35):
that's a way to actually start to structure that conversation
and making expectations realistic.
Speaker 2 (29:41):
Okay, I hope that's answered the question.
Speaker 3 (29:43):
I also don't think it's gaslighting to tell you kids
there's a center. I think it's just fun.
Speaker 2 (29:48):
I always liked the mythology that went around it. And
something my grandfather used to do was that we would
have to go out when the sun had gone down
and Christmas Eve to see if we could do raindeer spotting, right,
so we'd actually look up in the sky and he'd
really invest some time and being like, oh, I think
that was one there, you know, And so that was
kind of his and it was just fun. It was
(30:10):
fun to kind of create the story and then have
those moments that could, you know, sort of enter generationally.
You could you could talk about, Yeah, so it's fun. Yeah, Yeah,
don't don't don't. Don't feel that it's a negative thing.
You're fine, Just go with it. All right, let's go
to the lines. Neil, good morning to you.
Speaker 5 (30:27):
Good morning to you, sir. I'm staying awake to enjoy
your program. A couple of things about Christmas, if I
may please, among all my by Darling White, my children,
my grandchildren. There will be presents going backwards and force
(30:49):
all over the place. But for me, what I've done
is I've written a personal note to each one saying
why I love and admire them for my present, you know,
and I'm giving each one of them by notes, an
individual notes.
Speaker 2 (31:08):
That's very perfect. Love it.
Speaker 5 (31:11):
That's my idea. And the other thing I want to say,
I had great for a few years ago. We had
an open fire and the tradition was that the children
or grandchild would write the notes Father Christmas. We'd put
it in the fire and then the fire fairies would
(31:31):
take it up the chimney to Father Christmas. The sparks.
Speaker 2 (31:34):
Oh, I love it.
Speaker 5 (31:36):
So they did this, and then I wrote a letter
from Father Christmas, which I then smeared with jam and
put it an envelope and posted it to my youngest grandson.
And Father Christmas sent him a lot of things. And
so he got his letter and said sorry about the mess,
but those elves have been stealing jam again, and he
(31:59):
thought it was marvelous.
Speaker 2 (32:02):
Yeah, that's that's perfect. That's that's fun that you were
talking about.
Speaker 5 (32:06):
That's fun I'm talking about.
Speaker 2 (32:07):
Yeah, Yeah, that's wonderful, Neil. I love that.
Speaker 5 (32:12):
Yeah, I saw my family, you know.
Speaker 2 (32:17):
Yeah, a brilliant, brilliant And before.
Speaker 5 (32:21):
I go and I stay awake on a Sunday, I
shall go straight to sleep in a few minutes. But
I enjoy staying up and listening. And I always enjoy
your wonderful callers. I really do. They are special people.
Speaker 2 (32:39):
Well, thank you, Neil. And because I tell you what,
I enjoy them a lot too. I think that's the
best thing about the show.
Speaker 5 (32:46):
Okay, God mess to you and Merry Christmas.
Speaker 3 (32:50):
And now you're one of those special people too that
calls us.
Speaker 5 (32:52):
Don't forget that God can hear you telling lies.
Speaker 2 (32:59):
Good on you mate, and happy happy season's greetings, Merry Christmas,
all of the above. Let's go straight to the lines.
You've all been very very patient there, Steve. Good morning
to you.
Speaker 7 (33:10):
Yeah, good morning, joy, I said on my first corner. Yeah,
I wasn't a royal oak. And I think a little
key and bring Mamie to say it. And it's been
very hard for me this Stroschmas because I've been diagnosed
(33:32):
with breeding properly problem, you know, breathing problems and fatima. Yep.
Speaker 2 (33:39):
Now that that would be really really hard Steve.
Speaker 7 (33:42):
And and that makes it really really hard because to
go anywhere I'm going to use my motor vehicle as
I can't walk for easide there with my breathing.
Speaker 2 (33:54):
In that, you know what I mean, Yeah, that would
make sense.
Speaker 7 (33:57):
And I'm sort of living on the iron there. And
of course my car is going to go for a
while this month. That's you over am expecting to be
about eight hundred of their doors with the repairs, and
hopefully winds will paper for me, you know, on the pension.
And I need it for a year around, you know
(34:18):
what I mean?
Speaker 2 (34:19):
Yeah, yeah, no, I mean it's it's always really hard,
especially this time of year, when suddenly you get those
unforeseen costs like that coming out of nowhere, and it's
not really what you need. It's it's not it's not
a great part of the of the pressure that can
come up around the system.
Speaker 7 (34:36):
No, well, the problem, see you're going for a while now,
it's ninety dollars for a one man. You realize that, Yeah, yeah,
just to look at your car. Yeah, and with minor
I think it's a water pump. It's trama, but I
think it's a water pump's gone, and you know it
coull be eight eight hundred, two thousand dollars. But the
(35:02):
government has been pretty good knowing that I need this year,
an I can't. I can't walk to this O. I
can't walk to live. My doctors are and ev and
down over the rural awake, and I need a cardy
everywhere I go. We were reliable to get me here,
there and everywhere.
Speaker 2 (35:20):
Well that that would make sense. So what what are
you planning to do for Christmas? Them? What's Christmas looking
like for you? Steve?
Speaker 1 (35:27):
Oh?
Speaker 7 (35:28):
Pretty quiet. I'm sort of on my own, I think.
Speaker 5 (35:34):
You know.
Speaker 7 (35:34):
I've always had people around me and my wife, you know,
because before we saw I mean, I've always had lots
of people in and now I've been on my own
now for about the past three years. That's funny and
hard to sort of meet and visit, you know, friends
and stuff like that. There. I wasn't a sport, Yes,
(35:57):
I watched. I watched too. Where your games of cricket today? Yep,
ye the women women criculars We're in the gage and
that the women criculars. I'll tell you what. They're better
than them, me and some of them, hopefully. I watched
these superb games. Now drink from Usie and the youngest girl.
(36:20):
If I had a year with it at this big
bass level, cricket goal and she was only sixteen years
of age and he was Anna's ball for mile. Unbelievable. Yeah, yeah,
this in the big day and as you know, and yeah,
(36:40):
I want my sports and music really guitar play and
interests and yeah, I just think you need to get
out of it and try and meet some of them
for companionship.
Speaker 2 (36:57):
You know, Steve, I'll tell you what. I don't know
if you heard me say this earlier on the show,
but remember I said that that, you know, the thing
I love most about the show as the audience and
love that people can do. Steve, I have just had
a text come through and it is somebody who was
(37:18):
just saying, would you like a mobility scooter because they
have one to give away. Would that be helpful?
Speaker 7 (37:25):
Oh that would be helpful. Yeah, okay, that would be
really helpful.
Speaker 2 (37:30):
That has come through from Kate. Now the only little
the only hassle here is Kate's and christ Kate's and
christ Church and you're in Auckland.
Speaker 7 (37:39):
Right Yeah.
Speaker 2 (37:41):
Yeah, Well, where there's a will, there's a way, and
you know what, it's Christmas, so we're going to make
this happen.
Speaker 3 (37:47):
Surely someone must be driving from christ Church to Auckland.
Speaker 2 (37:50):
If there's anyone, if there's anyone who's got a solution
out there who would like to help, then I think Steve,
you know, it would be wonderful to be able to
get this, get this scooter from christ Church, the mobility
scooter from christ Church to you. If anyone, if any
one could help with that, anyone who's listening, than either
(38:11):
give us a call one hundred and eighty ten eighty
or fleck us a text on nine two nine two.
Probably easier to text us on nine two nine two
because the lines are quite full at the moment and
we can get some details. But either way we will
figure a way to get that mobility scooter from christ
Church to you, Steve. So, Steve, can you hold on
(38:33):
the line. I'm just going to get one of our
producers to take your contact details and we're going to
make this happen. We're going to get the scooter into
your your possession. Kate. Who is I've got your number, Kate, Kate,
thank you so much. That is very tast very kind,
fantastic and incredibly kind. I love it when this sort
(38:57):
of stuff happens. So look, Steve, hold on the line.
We are going to we're going to get your details
and Kate, I've got your number. So, Kate, you are
going to hear from me later today.
Speaker 4 (39:10):
So I will.
Speaker 2 (39:11):
I will contact you and we will hatch a plan
in the meantime. Well, Kyl, I think we're going to
have to have a special lunchtime meeting.
Speaker 3 (39:19):
I think we might.
Speaker 2 (39:19):
What are you doing around about one o'clock today?
Speaker 3 (39:22):
Well, nothing, as it would happen.
Speaker 2 (39:23):
Well, I think we you, me and Boris we should
get together. We will come up with a solution to
get this mobility scooter from christ Church to Steve and
Auckland love it. If we can't do that, we're not
much bloody use or anything. Oh well, a lot of
truck drivers listen to us. We've got a lot of
truck he's listening. So if anyone's got any space on
a truck, why not, you know, Paul Steve with the
(39:46):
inphraseema it's not great, No, can't get around much, but
it'd be nice if perhaps he could get that scooted
by Christmas. I reckon we could make it happen. Let's
do it one way or another. We're going to make
that happen. Okay, good, on you, Steve, and thank you
so much, Kate.
Speaker 3 (40:01):
That is just fantastics, the spirit at Christmas.
Speaker 2 (40:04):
That's what I want to see. It's nice, isn't it. Hey.
Another another sporting news the sal GP Grand Final has
just concluded. Am and New Zealand came third.
Speaker 3 (40:19):
Yeah, who won the British Yeah, yeah, that's even worse.
Speaker 2 (40:22):
Yeah, we were looking like a credible second, but the
Australians pipped us just at the last minute. It was
pretty bad.
Speaker 3 (40:28):
Well, we're going to beat the Australians in the sevens final,
so there we go.
Speaker 2 (40:31):
Yeah we will. We will. So not not the outcome
we were looking for in the sale GP, but that's
all right. We'll continue on with the.
Speaker 3 (40:39):
And the Grand Prix is in Ka. So we've got
sale GP. We've got the Grand Prix and the rugby
sevens all in the Middle East.
Speaker 2 (40:47):
Yeah, it's all happening there you go. All right, We've
got Steve is on the line with Jimmy at the moment.
Who's just making that and somebody else said to Katus
has texted back and she just said she said, it's
all good. It was my brother's he only just passed away.
And she said another love to gift it to Steve brilliant.
(41:10):
His name was Stephen too.
Speaker 3 (41:11):
Oh look there you go.
Speaker 2 (41:13):
Yeah, okay, So from from one Steve who's not going
to be with us this Christmas to another Steve who
will make good use of it. Katie, thank you so much.
That is just incredibly kind And I love it when
people do do this sort of stuff. So I will
give you a call later today and we'll make some
arrangements to be able to figure out how to get
(41:33):
it north. In the meantime, if you're listening and you
can help it all and would be very grateful one
or another, we'll find a way. That's what we do
here at the Nutters Club. A.
Speaker 3 (41:42):
Yeah, it is man, you know where maybe we need
just to get center fly it up?
Speaker 7 (41:47):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (41:47):
Why not? Yeah, I and there needs to do a
bit of a dry running exactly now you're thinking.
Speaker 3 (41:57):
Can I tell you a quick story about the center,
the whole Santa story go on the flying Reindeers. Yeah,
so apparently I've I've checked this online and there is
some validity to it. There's a tribe in Siberia of
indigenous people who used to discovered through means. It's probably
best not to think about that reindeer eat a particular
kind of lichen and mold which has a psychedelic property
(42:22):
which when the reindeer eats it and then urinates, the
urine consumed by humans as a psychedelic drug. And so
it was part of their shamanistic rituals. Way way way.
Speaker 2 (42:35):
Back, getting getting off your face on the.
Speaker 3 (42:37):
Reindeer used to call it going on a trip through
the sky with the reindeer.
Speaker 2 (42:42):
Going on a trip through the sky.
Speaker 3 (42:44):
Apparently that's where the flying reindeer bit of the center
myth comes from. Psychedelic reindeer urine.
Speaker 2 (42:50):
Imagine that being like what you got there, but a
reindeer piss good stuff. It's good stuff, mate, knock it back.
Speaker 3 (42:58):
We're going for a trip.
Speaker 2 (42:58):
We're going for a trip.
Speaker 7 (43:00):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (43:01):
Yeah, So this is how all these little pieces of
coke invented the modern they did they did?
Speaker 2 (43:07):
Yeah, yeah, mean Coca cola satan. Yeah, maybe that is
a Nutter Snutter's story right there. Now, I'm never going
to think about reindeer. You're in the same again. That
is outstanding. Okay, I'll tell you what Diane has texted
on and said, Hey, I'm happy to donate two hundred
bucks towards any freight cost to get the mobility scooter
(43:28):
for Steve.
Speaker 3 (43:28):
Here we go. We've got some momentum.
Speaker 2 (43:30):
Now, very very kind, we may take you up on that, Diane.
I've got your number. I'll see what happens. And Patty
ticks it and said, gosh, I'm loving that's a woman
my heart giving those who need cheers. Patty, Yeah, well.
Speaker 3 (43:42):
This is a ANOTHERS club after all. Maybe we should
just find someone who's prepared to right drive it to Roylake.
Speaker 2 (43:48):
I mean, I'm taking this baby with a way to
a city of sales and hour how long? Five k's now? God,
I reckon you. What would you do? You could get
onto a train.
Speaker 3 (44:00):
You could get onto a train, get onto a city,
get onto a trailer, get.
Speaker 2 (44:03):
Onto a trailer. Yeah, absolutely, I think she might be
might be here by Christmas next year, if you I
think Steve needs it before then. All right, Oh, Lisa's
tixon good questions. She said, Hi, guys, just wondering when
your last show for the years and when you'll be
back please. Last show will be the fourteenth, two more
after tonight, yeah, two more after tonight. So yeah, the
(44:25):
last show will be the fourteenth of December, and then
we will be back I understand on the eighteenth of January.
Speaker 3 (44:35):
Yeah, on the eighteenth. I won't be with you for
that one, but back the week after.
Speaker 2 (44:38):
Because you're still traveling around whatever on my reindeer trip. Yeah. Yeah,
you can have all the reindeer urine you want. Perfect.
I did not think when I said that we were
going to have this sort of you know, make a
plan for Christmas tonight. I really did not think that
we would be talking about reindeer urine. This is what
happens after midnight, and yet here we are. What a
(44:58):
way to go. Well that's it for this episode of
the Nutters Club. Thanks to all our supremely insightful callers,
Texters and of course Katie in christ Church for proving
without doubt that we have the best audience in the world.
Also a special thanks to my co host, psychotherapist Carle
(45:20):
MacDonald for what will be his last episode of twenty
twenty five. Enjoy the break mate, You've earned it. If
you like what you heard and think it might help
someone out there, then please share this episode on your
own channels or with family and friends. And if you
ever want to be part of the show. Give us
a call or a text when we broadcast live on
newstalks hed B eleven pm Sunday nights, New Zealand standard time.
(45:44):
Check out Newstalk SHADB dot co dot nz for local
frequencies or a link to the live stream. A big
thanks to New Zealand on Air for their ongoing support
and making the show. Take care and always remember that
the world is a better place with you in it.
Life it isn't easy, it is however worth it.
Speaker 1 (46:08):
MH for more from News Talk st B. Listen live
on air or online, and keep our shows with you
wherever you go with our podcasts on iHeartRadio
You're listening to a podcast from News Talk said B.
Follow this and our wide range of podcasts now on iHeartRadio.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Greetings and welcome. I'm Hamish Williams and you're listening to
the podcast version of The Nuns Club, a radio show
about mental health broadcast weekly on news Talk seed B.
Each week we talk about mental health experiences and the
hope that it might help you with your own. The
show is broadcast live on Sunday nights on News Talk
(00:40):
seed B right across New Zealand and around the world.
This week, we talked about how the festive season can
impact our mental health and what to be aware of
to make sure you get the most out of it
and it doesn't take it out of you. Topics we
focused on were around the impact of drinking and food,
the financial demands, and balancing the trickiest part of all,
(01:04):
the relationships with friends and family. Don't forget, though, there's
always space for a little Christmas magic. Let us know
what you think, as well as what you learn from
our chat on any of our social media platforms. Just
search for The Nutter's Club n Z. Let's get into
this week's episode. I kind of wanted to take tonight
(01:26):
to talk a bit about Christmas. Okay, okay, because tomorrow
is officially the countdown right first of December, it is.
Speaker 3 (01:33):
Yeah, yeah, So that all happens. You start the old
edvib calendar, n't you. If you've got those yep, yep,
you can. You can start playing the Christmas carols, you
should have the Christmas tree.
Speaker 2 (01:42):
Up for all of that. But ultimately, when it comes
to Christmas, as we well know, there's a whole bunch
of unique challenges that come with this time of the year,
and not all of them are particularly good for our
mental health. And so tonight I thought that we could
actually talk through what some of those things are and
(02:03):
find out some of the ways that we can best
create a plan to be able to survive the season,
if you like, because invariably it's a really really hard
time as well for so many different people, for so
many different reasons. So look, you know, for a start,
when it comes to Christmas time, Kong, you know, you start,
the calendar gets quite full, and there's all these sort
(02:24):
of Christmas parties that people want to have or catch ups, right,
and inevitably you end up finding that there's two things
that go with us a lot of eating and sometimes
a lot of drinking.
Speaker 3 (02:36):
Yeah, and sometimes even some drug use around the edges
for people who may socialize in that manner as well. So,
I mean it's one of those times of year. You know,
having worked many years in various addictions services, it's a
tricky one because it is there's an expectation that alcohol's
kind of involved at this time of year, and as
(02:56):
you say, often overdoing it in general is you know,
considered normal. I think they're really important thing and that's
why I think, you know, it's really great we're talking
about this tonight. Actually right at the beginning of December.
It's really important to have a plan to actually decide
upon what's a structure. Well, you know, what are these
events that I'm going to have to tackle. What are
(03:18):
the parties where you know, maybe in the past I've
over done it or you know, particularly it's a professional environment,
do I need to think about being a little bit careful?
But moreover, how do you also keep on track with
all those really boring things we talk about, making sure
you're still getting enough sleep, still eating well, and you know,
getting enough exercise, keeping up those exercise routines as well.
Speaker 2 (03:41):
Oh, come on, what's the holidays, Kyle? It's Christmas time?
Do I still have to go to the gym?
Speaker 3 (03:45):
Yeah, well you don't have to go to the gym,
but you know you can go for a walk on
the beach, go for a swim, you know, still keeping
active in some way, even if you're away from your
home base, away from the gym, still make sure that
you're getting out every day and doing something active, because
it's those things that actually can really start to particularly
if we've had difficulties with alcohol and drugs in the past,
(04:06):
where we could just sort of slide back into those
bad habits quite easily at this time of year, because
there's so many opportunities, right.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
Sure, and there's so many people sort of saying, oh,
you know, you just have another one, have another one.
All that sort of stuff, right, that's reasonably normal, and some.
Speaker 3 (04:21):
Of the structures you can put in place are often
quite simple. But that's really about making that commitment beforehand.
So for instance, making sure that perhaps you said at
leaving time and you know, some people choose to drive
so they know they have to drive home. You know,
not a great one if you've had issues with that
in the past. But some people find that a really
useful way to put that stop in place. You know, most,
(04:43):
I think most responsible organizations these days have some kind
of zero alcohol alternatives and maybe buddy up. You know,
if there are people in your workplace or people that
you know who are also wanting to keep a lit
on things or maybe don't drink at all as well,
make sure you check in with them and sort of
keep make sure you can keep you both both of
you on track.
Speaker 2 (05:04):
I reckon the idea of having a cutoff time is
a really good one. I think. So it's a good
one because the things can drag on forever. Right, So
you say, look, you know, I'm going to go at
eight thirty nine o'clock. And here's the thing. Here's the thing.
People at Christmas time, you can always use the excuse
got to pick up some family who are coming flying
in early in the morning.
Speaker 3 (05:20):
There you go. My number of times I've used my
kids as an excuse over the years. Yeah, it's a
great excuse for Look, I've got to I've got to
go home. I'm going to help help get the kids
to bed. Yeah, right, you know, I don't like it
when I'm not there. It's not entirely true, but it's
always a good way to have something that people can
feel comfortable about why you're leaving.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
Kids need to be the right age to do that.
I don't think I could pull that off of my bay.
It definitely does have a shelf life. Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay,
So having a plan is really good when it comes
to just making sure that you're being responsible and also too,
you know, obviously not being rude.
Speaker 3 (05:54):
Yeah, and look, if you have had problems with addiction
in the past, this is a really good time a
year to up those supports. So if you're an AA member,
if you go along to AA for your support or NA,
it's a great time. You had to go to a
few extra meetings if you fe're really feeling that pressure,
or you know, make sure that you keep up your
counseling and therapy sessions right up to the Christmas break.
(06:14):
Whatever works for you.
Speaker 2 (06:15):
And like we've always said, and you knocked it out
of the park, Kile when you said, it's also to
making sure you enough sleep, making sure you get the exercise,
and yeah, okay, there can be lots of food, but
sometimes it's that really rich stuff which you know doesn't
necessarily make you feel one hundred percent. So do yourself
a favor, go for a nice walk, do the world
of good. Let's go to the lines, Marie. Good evening to.
Speaker 4 (06:37):
You, Oh, good evening. Guys. Just wanted to share a
little bit about Christmas.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
Yeah, go for it.
Speaker 4 (06:44):
Sorry, I've got a kirky voice. I've had a bad cold,
so I hope you can hear me.
Speaker 2 (06:49):
Okay, I can hear you. Find it. It sounds kind
of like husky and a little mysterious. I like it,
thank you.
Speaker 5 (06:56):
That's jud me up.
Speaker 4 (06:57):
No, I find Christmas very what's the word overwhelming sometimes
because it's the advertisers being happy, happy, but not everybody
is happy, heap. I was brought up in a loving family,
and I always thought when I had my children that
we'd all get together like my family did. But it
doesn't quite work like that because you have other family,
(07:20):
new members coming, and sometimes they complicate things and always
it gets all broken up. So that's sort of It's
not always great. And one of my sons is away
overseas anyway, so I'm missym terribly at Christmas this year. Anyway,
He'll be back next year, and then financially things go wrong.
(07:42):
So advertising on TV is are all about buying, but
sometimes you can't buy what you wish to buy. For family,
because we've had a car breakdown and that's that needs
a new motor and that's we can't get one, so
it's going to be thrown away basically the car. That's
kind of sad at Christmas. Yeah, and then our little
(08:05):
dog last Sunday and he passed away with us.
Speaker 2 (08:09):
Oh no, I'm sorry to hear that.
Speaker 4 (08:11):
So that was really sad. That she's bounced back. So
I'm really happy about that.
Speaker 2 (08:14):
It's a Christmas miracle.
Speaker 4 (08:16):
Yes, she's really bright, she's she's a real little fighter.
Speaker 2 (08:20):
Lots of dog's names.
Speaker 4 (08:23):
Her name's Lily Ellen.
Speaker 2 (08:24):
Lily Ellen, well done, Lily.
Speaker 4 (08:27):
She's a little just a little up Jeck Russell sots.
Speaker 6 (08:32):
Yeah, they are.
Speaker 4 (08:33):
She's so intelligent and we thought we were going to
lose her, but no, she bounced back, so we really
rapped about that. Yeah, so that was sad, but it's
good now. So I just I don't know if other
people get overwhelmed at Christmas.
Speaker 2 (08:50):
Absolutely, you're not alone, Marie. You're not alone at all.
And some of the things that you've talked about there.
You know, we wanted to touch on tonight as well,
especially when it comes to that financial strain that people
can get put under, and obviously a lot of it's
are around you know, the gifts, right.
Speaker 4 (09:07):
It is it can be yes, and you want to
give gifts, see what like you used to when you
get a bit of a struggle, you can't and you
feel like you're letting everybody down and you feel isolated.
Speaker 2 (09:20):
Well, I'll tell you what. We've got a bit of
an idea around the gift giving thing as actually when
it comes to buying the gifts, and I get it.
You know, it's nice to buy something nice to someone
and I've put some thought into it and I've gone
and spent money, my money on it, but you know,
to to sort of show how much you know, I value.
But here's the thing is that I think gifts can
(09:41):
come and go. But you know, often something we say
is people don't always remember the detail of things, but
they do remember how you made them feel. Okay, right,
So right where I'm going to with this, try this
for an idea. Don't worry about the gift in terms
of you know, I'm going to buy you a nice vase,
(10:01):
don't worry about the physical gift, worry about the Christmas card.
And in fact that's true, I would say just leave
the gift out. I would much rather that Marie sends
me a Christmas card and says, Hamish, this is what
I value about you most, and and actually take the
(10:24):
time to fill in that card. And you don't even
have to say Merry Christmas. You just you say it
with compliments about that person, about what it is that
you think you value about them, and what you think
of their greatest traits. Right, and then because remember you
always have to sign important documents, don't you, So you
(10:48):
sign this at the bottom and then and then you
send it to the person. Now, how do you think
that's going to make somebody feel when they open that
envelope and read.
Speaker 4 (10:58):
That, Oh really really good it really is.
Speaker 2 (11:03):
Now what did it cost you to do that? Exactly?
Some time, some time, some thought, and and that person
will always remember, They'll remember the card they got from Marie.
Speaker 4 (11:17):
Oh that sounds cool.
Speaker 2 (11:19):
You know. I would much rather have that that turn
up than a than a new vase.
Speaker 4 (11:25):
Oh you guys are call I listen to you every week,
and I think you're all great and all the call
of it, call in.
Speaker 2 (11:32):
Yeah, well you're one of them, Marie, so we think
you're great too. So you know, that's exactly how we
do this on the show.
Speaker 4 (11:40):
Oh it's lovely.
Speaker 2 (11:41):
Thank you so much, No, thank you for calling, lovely for.
Speaker 4 (11:43):
Chat you too, think you goud?
Speaker 2 (11:46):
Okay, Well Christmas, Merry Christmas. So that's the idea. Yeah,
I think it's a great idea. I think the other
thing too, with regards to money in general, particularly in families,
is I think it's never too early to start having frank, honest,
grounded conversations with your family and particularly with your kids
(12:06):
about money. You know, you don't need to freak them out,
make them, you know, worried about money, but actually it's
about being realistic and saying, well, this is what we
can afford, or this is what's come up this year,
or this is what we're you know, this is the
resources that we have for this Christmas, and how are
we going to think about this together? Because I think,
particularly with families, a lot of times the disappointments and
(12:27):
expectations around money happen because we aren't actually able to communate,
communicate clearly and directly in a way that works with
each other. Yeah, I mean I can understand where when
it comes to kids, you know, writing a nice Christmas
card may not probably cut it. Yeah, because kids have
different expectations, right of course. Yeah, so you know it
can be different different things that you can do.
Speaker 3 (12:48):
Never underestimate children's ability to actually understand if you give
them the facts.
Speaker 2 (12:53):
Okay, so have those of course.
Speaker 3 (12:56):
Doing that in an age appropriate way, but actually talking
to them about you know, well, this is how much
money we have for Christmas, and this is our budget
for things, and this is how we're going to think
about it together.
Speaker 2 (13:06):
And you can even make the point that you know,
we don't have a lot, but we're still going to
give you something special because you're special to us.
Speaker 3 (13:13):
That's it.
Speaker 2 (13:14):
Just do the communication thing. Don't leave anything to people wondering,
because it's often you know, in the absence of information,
people make up their own stories, right, absolutely, and so
you're actually better just to be honest and have that chat.
I like it, Kyl. Good evening to you, Karen.
Speaker 6 (13:33):
Oh hi, how's it going?
Speaker 2 (13:34):
Yeah, good good. How are you getting all ready for Christmas?
Speaker 4 (13:38):
Yes?
Speaker 6 (13:39):
Yes, just slowly yep. Now I wanted to talk about
Christmas gifts, and I'm a person that is making and
I often give a lot of Christmas gifts, but a
lot of them are made. So I will, you know,
my wonderful mechanic and new len will get Sometimes we'll
(14:00):
get a Christmas pudding made by me my family. Sometimes
Christmas cakes that I make. I make them all and
I give them away to family for Christmas gifts and
friends as well. And also sometimes you know, because I'm
on a benefit, so you know, I can't give I
can't spend a lot of money. But even just giving
things like like special hand cree not handcres, hand.
Speaker 7 (14:25):
Soap and stuff like that.
Speaker 6 (14:28):
Just giving simple gifts. It's not something it's sometimes people
like to open something at Christmas. And it doesn't have
to be expensive because a lot of the time you
get gifts that is like, oh.
Speaker 4 (14:39):
What am I going to do with that?
Speaker 2 (14:40):
You know?
Speaker 6 (14:41):
But if you give practical things, and this is what
the thing is is, people get gifts that they don't want,
you know. But if you give things like hand hand soap,
things that people use, you know, I mean, you know,
I love that.
Speaker 3 (14:55):
My My eldest daughter, who was thirteen last Christmas, she
really wanted to give everyone in our family a gift,
which is quite a task and we actually don't usually
do that. So what she decided to do was to
make Christmas.
Speaker 8 (15:07):
Cookies, you know, little There was one or two cookies
for each person, and some of them had you know,
she put icing on them with the letters of their
name and then all sorts, you know, took real some
time with them, and I reckon they were everyone's favorite gift.
Speaker 7 (15:21):
Actually, yeah, well.
Speaker 6 (15:22):
My brother loves my cinnamon and sutia cookies for Christmas.
Nice nice thing I do about fearful batches and give
them out to friends that my brother loves my cinnamon
and sultana biscuits, and so give him a bat for
Christmas as well, So you know what I mean. You know,
I don't have to spend a lot of money. Sometimes
it's just time.
Speaker 5 (15:41):
It's just you know, time and.
Speaker 6 (15:45):
Cook with love, you know, made with love.
Speaker 1 (15:48):
You know.
Speaker 2 (15:49):
Well, Karen, tyme, time is the most valuable thing that
we have and for you to give your time to
do that, you know, baking is one of the best
buddy gifts you can get anyway. But Karen, tell me this,
we do give the baking. How do you feel about.
Speaker 6 (16:05):
It oh great, because I haven't spent a lot of money.
And when you give your friends or your family their
favorite baking gifts, it lights up their face. So you've
given the right gift. It might not last for forever,
it might last for a day or two, but you know,
I mean, that's the whole idea of Christmas is giving
(16:27):
from your heart. It's not necessarily what something costs or
you know, or the best gift. It comes from the heart.
So when you cook things with love, people see that,
and that goes a lot further than, you know, than
just buying something expensive. And if people start to think
about what they can do and love. I mean, it's
not just food. You can make baskets, you can do
(16:50):
up and crafts and make things, you know, or weaving.
You know, there's lots of things like macrame you can do,
like those hanging mccrome things that you put pots and
pots of plants, and there's lots of things people can
do that you can make and spend time doing rather
than spending money. Because money is hard to come by
(17:14):
these days, so you know, a lot of people are struggling,
and you know, so it's really really hard sometimes, but
just finding those, you know, those meaningful gifts that people
really enjoy is most important when it comes to giving
gifts for Christmas.
Speaker 2 (17:29):
Karen, you have absolutely nailed it. And who would be
so lucky as to get a gift from you? Is
what I will saying.
Speaker 6 (17:37):
You know, Christmas pudding and homemade Christmas cake, you know,
and it's my family can enjoy those. Some of my
family do. Others like the biscuits, so you know, and
my mechanic loves as he does for.
Speaker 2 (17:52):
The whole homemade. I mean, this is so creative. I
love I love where you've gone with us, Karen, So yeah,
good on you. You're doing great.
Speaker 6 (18:01):
I would hope, I would hope the listeners will take
something from it, and you know, so that you know
that they can gain something better rather than spending money.
You know, It's like, it's not the money side of things,
it's the heart that's where it comes from the heart.
And if you've spent time making something for someone in
a day, wow, you know amazing. It might be last
(18:23):
to day, but it's still.
Speaker 5 (18:24):
The heart, you know.
Speaker 2 (18:26):
Yeah, well you'd be lucky in my household, you see,
I don't have that much of a sweet tooth. So
if you were to give me some biscuits, I'd say
thank you so much, and I'd just think, oh, you know,
I'll just work my way through those over the next
week or two.
Speaker 6 (18:37):
I would probably if people another sweet to that, I
would probably look at a Christmas pudding or half a
Christmas pudding, because I make up I'm actually you know what.
I make my Christmas puddings in the slow cooker.
Speaker 2 (18:48):
On the slow cooker, oh fantastic.
Speaker 6 (18:51):
Eighteenth an hour, so it's very cheap to make. So
it's actually cheaper to the ingredients cost more than the
actual cooking time. So if you make it in a
slow cooker, you will save so much money.
Speaker 2 (19:03):
Well that is obviously you know exactly what you're doing.
Follow Karen for more than cooking tips. Now, what I
was going to say Karen is like, you know, I
might work my way through the vickies quickly. That would
be my plan, but my stink and family would eat
all of them within the day. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (19:22):
I really regret the fact that my kids tall enough
now to've reached the top shelf that's where always to
hide things.
Speaker 2 (19:28):
Two teenagers, two teenagers and my wife, of whom I
will say I do all love them dearly, but sweet
stuff in our house just it just goes.
Speaker 3 (19:39):
Sounds like you need a small safe for Christmas.
Speaker 2 (19:43):
I have been known to hide things to keep them
away from them. This is what has to be done.
Great texts just came in said, absolutely loved Karen's call,
made my day perfect. I agree.
Speaker 3 (19:58):
And you know what it is about the feeling that
you put into baking. I totally agree with that, and
that's from Kelly the bloke. But here's the thing that
Karen was actually summarizing was and why I asked her
how did she feel about it? Was doing these things,
actually going through the process of making something for somebody else,
not buying something, making something. The mental health impact is
(20:19):
that it actually makes you feel good too. Yeah, because
there's a process and all sorts of personalize. You think
about the person, what you know they might like, so
you know you're personalizing it right from the get go.
Speaker 2 (20:30):
It's like a win win. What does this say, two
bottles of sav blanc, two zoppocne daily, twenty years of bliss.
Go figure.
Speaker 3 (20:42):
I'm not sure that's a great recipe for Christmas.
Speaker 2 (20:45):
No, No, I'd probably have to be a little bit
careful on that one have a chat to a medical
professional before taking the diagnosis or the medication.
Speaker 3 (20:55):
Although having said that, I mean, you know, in all seriousness,
it is a good time to check in with your
GP about medication because some people do find that actually
they may need a little bit of what we call
extra pre which is essentially medication you can use when
required for anxiety. Okay, so that includes things like sleeping
medications or other medications that people used to decrease anxiety.
(21:18):
So you know, embrace all the solutions, but just do
it safely.
Speaker 4 (21:21):
People.
Speaker 2 (21:23):
This is from Jay and East that just says, hi,
girls and guys. We've never rung you or text you
until now, but there is one thing sure is that
we always listen to you each Sunday night. Keep up
the great show and also don't forget to tell us
the rugby score. Well actually I can tell you now.
The score is. It's half time for fig and New
Zealand and the sevens and New Zealand and fourteen NICEG seven,
(21:49):
So you go, it's not too bad. This text from
Matt says Evening Team, congratulations on the award. You deserve it. Well,
thank you. I don't like Christmas this year is especially difficult.
Ever since we divorced, my ex wife's family invited me over.
Since both of us were single, it was okay ish.
Now she's wanting to bring her current boyfriend along. I
(22:11):
don't like him at all. She thinks we would be
great friends. I, on the other hand, don't like him
at all. So I will be spending this holiday alone.
Christmas this year has been canceled. I'd much rather work
relationships at Christmas time. Yeah, can get really difficult, right
they can. Yeah, especially if you've got family. Obviously, this
(22:34):
one's relationships involved. So Kyle, when it comes to this,
because you know, you don't get to choose your family,
you know, and you try your best to choose good friends.
What's a good rule of thumb to be able to
apply it, to make sure that you know, we're actually
a looking after ourselves, to actually make sure that we
preserve our mental health, but also too at the same
(22:56):
time that tricky thing sometimes having to be considerate of
other people as well.
Speaker 5 (23:01):
Well.
Speaker 3 (23:01):
I actually think on face failure, I think the Texas
solution is not a bad one. If you can just work,
then you can do that. I think the important thing
is to make sure that you have some kind of
time off that's special to you at another time so
you're not completely missing out. But juggling those kinds of
separations is really hard. I mean, you know, that's why
you know, most parenting agreements actually have these are advised
(23:21):
to have these things spelt out because this is where
the arguments flare up. So don't be you know, I
think one of the things is to really embrace a
different day, is a Christmas with separated families, to make
sure that you still do that in a way that's special.
But also I mean, I think a lot of times
that these things come down to us being able to
(23:42):
figure out what our boundaries are. First, they actually start
with your side of the street, what do you need,
what's going to work for you? And then what's the
most effective way to try and communicate that to the
people that you need to communicate it to. So it
may be that actually there are people in your family
you don't want to see at Christmas time, and you
have a right to make that choice. There's no have tos.
The hard part, of course, is then how you go
(24:03):
about communicating that. But I think if we start from
a really honest place of what do I want? How
can I take responsibility for my side of the street
and then figure out some ways to put that into action,
Which is again, why are we're talking about this now,
because actually there's enough time to make a plan potentially
and put that plan in action.
Speaker 2 (24:21):
Yeah. The one I've exercised, especially if you know you
might have family members, you know, you know that there
might be a tricky conversation, is actually having some some
what i'd call you know, you get out of jail
free lines to use. So if you know, suddenly somebody
wants to talk about something that perhaps you don't want
to talk about, how about them sevens? Eh? Well, I
(24:42):
mean I'd be happy to talk about the Sevens to
be honest, but you know, for some people who may
not know about the rugby, that could be a difficult challenge.
But it's about having the line absolutely that you have
and you and I mean it can be as simple
as just saying I think that's a conversation for another day.
Nice something like that.
Speaker 3 (25:02):
So again, boundaries, right, taking responsibility for.
Speaker 2 (25:04):
What we can do? Yeah, absolutely. Hey, look I got
an other text here about Karen. It just says just
to say I love Karen's idea of homemade gifts of
cakes puddings, and another idea I love to give is
flowers out of our garden. So Albie talks about that
now and tie up with a pretty ribbon and sometimes
(25:24):
I sprinkle glitter on them. I love your idea of
rritning a nice card up for someone that will mean
more than a presy. You've both given me a real
lift and so love your shows. Every Sunday night Hubby
always says you have the nutters tonight as he watches TV.
He still encourages me to listen, and I always remember,
totally love your show, Marie and Sorry Marie and Lily
the Little Jack Russell. She always has one eye listening.
Speaker 3 (25:47):
Wo you lovely text?
Speaker 7 (25:48):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (25:48):
Very nice, So Cole, how does one explain to children
that Santa is short of money this year? Speaking of Santa,
is it still okay to guests like children into believing
he is real? How advisable is it nowadays to use
the threat of a lump of coal from Santa to
control kids behavior and what other unintended consequences might come
(26:10):
from the center tradition, the gas lighting is often justified
as necessary to creating the magic and wonder it brings
to small children, but do the pros really aren't weigh
the cons. Are there any listeners out there who are
not deceived into believing in Center? And if so, do
any of them feel they missed out or anything? The
mental health implications of Center. I've never really thought about
(26:33):
this guy. It's a good text. It is a great text.
Thank you for it.
Speaker 3 (26:36):
It's one of those things that makes me chuckle sometimes
because it's one of those things people write to call
them on. You know, are you lying to your child
if you tell them that Santa is real?
Speaker 2 (26:43):
And the thing is is it?
Speaker 3 (26:44):
Actually it's actually about understanding child development a little bit.
So it's about recognizing that actually children are still in
that place of play and magic and wonder And what
tend Stamp and you talk to most parents is kids
naturally come to an age where they figure it out themselves,
because they start to move out of that imaginary play
child space and kind of figure it out. What we
(27:08):
did and this worked quite well, And actually it started
for a completely selfish reason was even when the kids
were very little, we had Santa presents, But then we
also had a present that was from Mum and dad
and Mum and Dad always picked the best present.
Speaker 2 (27:26):
Ah. So basically it was like, yeah, screw you, Sandy,
You're not taking all the credit. Absolutely, I have felt
this way before. Actually yeah, and so we actually did
that and it worked quite well.
Speaker 3 (27:36):
Because what it also meant was that actually it started
a conversation about gift giving that was separate from the
whole Santa Malachy and one of the tricks that my
lovely partner did very well, particularly when the kids were little.
And this is another one just for those of you
out there listening, especially really little kids. They liked the
(27:57):
opening as much as they liked the things. Often and
so if you buy a three pack of socks, wrap
each pear separately, right, spend a bit more on the
wrapping paper. But actually it does give that sense of
you know, actually there's a lot of fun things to unwrap,
particularly with little kids, which is not about the money then,
(28:19):
it's actually just about the fun of the process.
Speaker 2 (28:21):
Okay. The question in there though, that I thought was
really interesting is how do you explain to kids that
Santa doesn't have a lot of money this year.
Speaker 3 (28:28):
Well, I think that's coming back round to what I
was saying that actually it's about Santa having some presence
and Mum and Dad having some presents, and actually it's
about recognizing that everyone around the world is a bit
tight this year, and so things are spread a bit thin,
and so Senta's had to spread his resources a bit
further this year. And actually, again I think being able
(28:51):
to make things fun and engaging, you know, wrapping things
up more or you know, making sure there's a few
extra special little things that might be you know, not
particularly expensive, but wrapped well and you can make a
big fuss of them, is actually about with little kids,
is about the fun and the process. Right, If they're
old enough to understand the concept of money and money
(29:15):
being a bit tight, then I think they're old enough
to have that conversation. Like I said, don't underestimate their
ability to understand these things. And you know, I think
it's never too early to start talking about money. I
know the Center thing is a complicated one, right, but
I think again, if you're actually having some presence from
Center and some presence from the parents, then I think
(29:35):
that's a way to actually start to structure that conversation
and making expectations realistic.
Speaker 2 (29:41):
Okay, I hope that's answered the question.
Speaker 3 (29:43):
I also don't think it's gaslighting to tell you kids
there's a center. I think it's just fun.
Speaker 2 (29:48):
I always liked the mythology that went around it. And
something my grandfather used to do was that we would
have to go out when the sun had gone down
and Christmas Eve to see if we could do raindeer spotting, right,
so we'd actually look up in the sky and he'd
really invest some time and being like, oh, I think
that was one there, you know, And so that was
kind of his and it was just fun. It was
(30:10):
fun to kind of create the story and then have
those moments that could, you know, sort of enter generationally.
You could you could talk about, Yeah, so it's fun. Yeah, Yeah,
don't don't don't. Don't feel that it's a negative thing.
You're fine, Just go with it. All right, let's go
to the lines. Neil, good morning to you.
Speaker 5 (30:27):
Good morning to you, sir. I'm staying awake to enjoy
your program. A couple of things about Christmas, if I
may please, among all my by Darling White, my children,
my grandchildren. There will be presents going backwards and force
(30:49):
all over the place. But for me, what I've done
is I've written a personal note to each one saying
why I love and admire them for my present, you know,
and I'm giving each one of them by notes, an
individual notes.
Speaker 2 (31:08):
That's very perfect. Love it.
Speaker 5 (31:11):
That's my idea. And the other thing I want to say,
I had great for a few years ago. We had
an open fire and the tradition was that the children
or grandchild would write the notes Father Christmas. We'd put
it in the fire and then the fire fairies would
(31:31):
take it up the chimney to Father Christmas. The sparks.
Speaker 2 (31:34):
Oh, I love it.
Speaker 5 (31:36):
So they did this, and then I wrote a letter
from Father Christmas, which I then smeared with jam and
put it an envelope and posted it to my youngest grandson.
And Father Christmas sent him a lot of things. And
so he got his letter and said sorry about the mess,
but those elves have been stealing jam again, and he
(31:59):
thought it was marvelous.
Speaker 2 (32:02):
Yeah, that's that's perfect. That's that's fun that you were
talking about.
Speaker 5 (32:06):
That's fun I'm talking about.
Speaker 2 (32:07):
Yeah, Yeah, that's wonderful, Neil. I love that.
Speaker 5 (32:12):
Yeah, I saw my family, you know.
Speaker 2 (32:17):
Yeah, a brilliant, brilliant And before.
Speaker 5 (32:21):
I go and I stay awake on a Sunday, I
shall go straight to sleep in a few minutes. But
I enjoy staying up and listening. And I always enjoy
your wonderful callers. I really do. They are special people.
Speaker 2 (32:39):
Well, thank you, Neil. And because I tell you what,
I enjoy them a lot too. I think that's the
best thing about the show.
Speaker 5 (32:46):
Okay, God mess to you and Merry Christmas.
Speaker 3 (32:50):
And now you're one of those special people too that
calls us.
Speaker 5 (32:52):
Don't forget that God can hear you telling lies.
Speaker 2 (32:59):
Good on you mate, and happy happy season's greetings, Merry Christmas,
all of the above. Let's go straight to the lines.
You've all been very very patient there, Steve. Good morning
to you.
Speaker 7 (33:10):
Yeah, good morning, joy, I said on my first corner. Yeah,
I wasn't a royal oak. And I think a little
key and bring Mamie to say it. And it's been
very hard for me this Stroschmas because I've been diagnosed
(33:32):
with breeding properly problem, you know, breathing problems and fatima. Yep.
Speaker 2 (33:39):
Now that that would be really really hard Steve.
Speaker 7 (33:42):
And and that makes it really really hard because to
go anywhere I'm going to use my motor vehicle as
I can't walk for easide there with my breathing.
Speaker 2 (33:54):
In that, you know what I mean, Yeah, that would
make sense.
Speaker 7 (33:57):
And I'm sort of living on the iron there. And
of course my car is going to go for a
while this month. That's you over am expecting to be
about eight hundred of their doors with the repairs, and
hopefully winds will paper for me, you know, on the pension.
And I need it for a year around, you know
(34:18):
what I mean?
Speaker 2 (34:19):
Yeah, yeah, no, I mean it's it's always really hard,
especially this time of year, when suddenly you get those
unforeseen costs like that coming out of nowhere, and it's
not really what you need. It's it's not it's not
a great part of the of the pressure that can
come up around the system.
Speaker 7 (34:36):
No, well, the problem, see you're going for a while now,
it's ninety dollars for a one man. You realize that, Yeah, yeah,
just to look at your car. Yeah, and with minor
I think it's a water pump. It's trama, but I
think it's a water pump's gone, and you know it
coull be eight eight hundred, two thousand dollars. But the
(35:02):
government has been pretty good knowing that I need this year,
an I can't. I can't walk to this O. I
can't walk to live. My doctors are and ev and
down over the rural awake, and I need a cardy
everywhere I go. We were reliable to get me here,
there and everywhere.
Speaker 2 (35:20):
Well that that would make sense. So what what are
you planning to do for Christmas? Them? What's Christmas looking
like for you? Steve?
Speaker 1 (35:27):
Oh?
Speaker 7 (35:28):
Pretty quiet. I'm sort of on my own, I think.
Speaker 5 (35:34):
You know.
Speaker 7 (35:34):
I've always had people around me and my wife, you know,
because before we saw I mean, I've always had lots
of people in and now I've been on my own
now for about the past three years. That's funny and
hard to sort of meet and visit, you know, friends
and stuff like that. There. I wasn't a sport, Yes,
(35:57):
I watched. I watched too. Where your games of cricket today? Yep,
ye the women women criculars We're in the gage and
that the women criculars. I'll tell you what. They're better
than them, me and some of them, hopefully. I watched
these superb games. Now drink from Usie and the youngest girl.
(36:20):
If I had a year with it at this big
bass level, cricket goal and she was only sixteen years
of age and he was Anna's ball for mile. Unbelievable. Yeah, yeah,
this in the big day and as you know, and yeah,
(36:40):
I want my sports and music really guitar play and
interests and yeah, I just think you need to get
out of it and try and meet some of them
for companionship.
Speaker 2 (36:57):
You know, Steve, I'll tell you what. I don't know
if you heard me say this earlier on the show,
but remember I said that that, you know, the thing
I love most about the show as the audience and
love that people can do. Steve, I have just had
a text come through and it is somebody who was
(37:18):
just saying, would you like a mobility scooter because they
have one to give away. Would that be helpful?
Speaker 7 (37:25):
Oh that would be helpful. Yeah, okay, that would be
really helpful.
Speaker 2 (37:30):
That has come through from Kate. Now the only little
the only hassle here is Kate's and christ Kate's and
christ Church and you're in Auckland.
Speaker 7 (37:39):
Right Yeah.
Speaker 2 (37:41):
Yeah, Well, where there's a will, there's a way, and
you know what, it's Christmas, so we're going to make
this happen.
Speaker 3 (37:47):
Surely someone must be driving from christ Church to Auckland.
Speaker 2 (37:50):
If there's anyone, if there's anyone who's got a solution
out there who would like to help, then I think Steve,
you know, it would be wonderful to be able to
get this, get this scooter from christ Church, the mobility
scooter from christ Church to you. If anyone, if any
one could help with that, anyone who's listening, than either
(38:11):
give us a call one hundred and eighty ten eighty
or fleck us a text on nine two nine two.
Probably easier to text us on nine two nine two
because the lines are quite full at the moment and
we can get some details. But either way we will
figure a way to get that mobility scooter from christ
Church to you, Steve. So, Steve, can you hold on
(38:33):
the line. I'm just going to get one of our
producers to take your contact details and we're going to
make this happen. We're going to get the scooter into
your your possession. Kate. Who is I've got your number, Kate, Kate,
thank you so much. That is very tast very kind,
fantastic and incredibly kind. I love it when this sort
(38:57):
of stuff happens. So look, Steve, hold on the line.
We are going to we're going to get your details
and Kate, I've got your number. So, Kate, you are
going to hear from me later today.
Speaker 4 (39:10):
So I will.
Speaker 2 (39:11):
I will contact you and we will hatch a plan
in the meantime. Well, Kyl, I think we're going to
have to have a special lunchtime meeting.
Speaker 3 (39:19):
I think we might.
Speaker 2 (39:19):
What are you doing around about one o'clock today?
Speaker 3 (39:22):
Well, nothing, as it would happen.
Speaker 2 (39:23):
Well, I think we you, me and Boris we should
get together. We will come up with a solution to
get this mobility scooter from christ Church to Steve and
Auckland love it. If we can't do that, we're not
much bloody use or anything. Oh well, a lot of
truck drivers listen to us. We've got a lot of
truck he's listening. So if anyone's got any space on
a truck, why not, you know, Paul Steve with the
(39:46):
inphraseema it's not great, No, can't get around much, but
it'd be nice if perhaps he could get that scooted
by Christmas. I reckon we could make it happen. Let's
do it one way or another. We're going to make
that happen. Okay, good, on you, Steve, and thank you
so much, Kate.
Speaker 3 (40:01):
That is just fantastics, the spirit at Christmas.
Speaker 2 (40:04):
That's what I want to see. It's nice, isn't it. Hey.
Another another sporting news the sal GP Grand Final has
just concluded. Am and New Zealand came third.
Speaker 3 (40:19):
Yeah, who won the British Yeah, yeah, that's even worse.
Speaker 2 (40:22):
Yeah, we were looking like a credible second, but the
Australians pipped us just at the last minute. It was
pretty bad.
Speaker 3 (40:28):
Well, we're going to beat the Australians in the sevens final,
so there we go.
Speaker 2 (40:31):
Yeah we will. We will. So not not the outcome
we were looking for in the sale GP, but that's
all right. We'll continue on with the.
Speaker 3 (40:39):
And the Grand Prix is in Ka. So we've got
sale GP. We've got the Grand Prix and the rugby
sevens all in the Middle East.
Speaker 2 (40:47):
Yeah, it's all happening there you go. All right, We've
got Steve is on the line with Jimmy at the moment.
Who's just making that and somebody else said to Katus
has texted back and she just said she said, it's
all good. It was my brother's he only just passed away.
And she said another love to gift it to Steve brilliant.
(41:10):
His name was Stephen too.
Speaker 3 (41:11):
Oh look there you go.
Speaker 2 (41:13):
Yeah, okay, So from from one Steve who's not going
to be with us this Christmas to another Steve who
will make good use of it. Katie, thank you so much.
That is just incredibly kind And I love it when
people do do this sort of stuff. So I will
give you a call later today and we'll make some
arrangements to be able to figure out how to get
(41:33):
it north. In the meantime, if you're listening and you
can help it all and would be very grateful one
or another, we'll find a way. That's what we do
here at the Nutters Club. A.
Speaker 3 (41:42):
Yeah, it is man, you know where maybe we need
just to get center fly it up?
Speaker 7 (41:47):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (41:47):
Why not? Yeah, I and there needs to do a
bit of a dry running exactly now you're thinking.
Speaker 3 (41:57):
Can I tell you a quick story about the center,
the whole Santa story go on the flying Reindeers. Yeah,
so apparently I've I've checked this online and there is
some validity to it. There's a tribe in Siberia of
indigenous people who used to discovered through means. It's probably
best not to think about that reindeer eat a particular
kind of lichen and mold which has a psychedelic property
(42:22):
which when the reindeer eats it and then urinates, the
urine consumed by humans as a psychedelic drug. And so
it was part of their shamanistic rituals. Way way way.
Speaker 2 (42:35):
Back, getting getting off your face on the.
Speaker 3 (42:37):
Reindeer used to call it going on a trip through
the sky with the reindeer.
Speaker 2 (42:42):
Going on a trip through the sky.
Speaker 3 (42:44):
Apparently that's where the flying reindeer bit of the center
myth comes from. Psychedelic reindeer urine.
Speaker 2 (42:50):
Imagine that being like what you got there, but a
reindeer piss good stuff. It's good stuff, mate, knock it back.
Speaker 3 (42:58):
We're going for a trip.
Speaker 2 (42:58):
We're going for a trip.
Speaker 7 (43:00):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (43:01):
Yeah, So this is how all these little pieces of
coke invented the modern they did they did?
Speaker 2 (43:07):
Yeah, yeah, mean Coca cola satan. Yeah, maybe that is
a Nutter Snutter's story right there. Now, I'm never going
to think about reindeer. You're in the same again. That
is outstanding. Okay, I'll tell you what Diane has texted
on and said, Hey, I'm happy to donate two hundred
bucks towards any freight cost to get the mobility scooter
(43:28):
for Steve.
Speaker 3 (43:28):
Here we go. We've got some momentum.
Speaker 2 (43:30):
Now, very very kind, we may take you up on that, Diane.
I've got your number. I'll see what happens. And Patty
ticks it and said, gosh, I'm loving that's a woman
my heart giving those who need cheers. Patty, Yeah, well.
Speaker 3 (43:42):
This is a ANOTHERS club after all. Maybe we should
just find someone who's prepared to right drive it to Roylake.
Speaker 2 (43:48):
I mean, I'm taking this baby with a way to
a city of sales and hour how long? Five k's now? God,
I reckon you. What would you do? You could get
onto a train.
Speaker 3 (44:00):
You could get onto a train, get onto a city,
get onto a trailer, get.
Speaker 2 (44:03):
Onto a trailer. Yeah, absolutely, I think she might be
might be here by Christmas next year, if you I
think Steve needs it before then. All right, Oh, Lisa's
tixon good questions. She said, Hi, guys, just wondering when
your last show for the years and when you'll be
back please. Last show will be the fourteenth, two more
after tonight, yeah, two more after tonight. So yeah, the
(44:25):
last show will be the fourteenth of December, and then
we will be back I understand on the eighteenth of January.
Speaker 3 (44:35):
Yeah, on the eighteenth. I won't be with you for
that one, but back the week after.
Speaker 2 (44:38):
Because you're still traveling around whatever on my reindeer trip. Yeah. Yeah,
you can have all the reindeer urine you want. Perfect.
I did not think when I said that we were
going to have this sort of you know, make a
plan for Christmas tonight. I really did not think that
we would be talking about reindeer urine. This is what
happens after midnight, and yet here we are. What a
(44:58):
way to go. Well that's it for this episode of
the Nutters Club. Thanks to all our supremely insightful callers,
Texters and of course Katie in christ Church for proving
without doubt that we have the best audience in the world.
Also a special thanks to my co host, psychotherapist Carle
(45:20):
MacDonald for what will be his last episode of twenty
twenty five. Enjoy the break mate, You've earned it. If
you like what you heard and think it might help
someone out there, then please share this episode on your
own channels or with family and friends. And if you
ever want to be part of the show. Give us
a call or a text when we broadcast live on
newstalks hed B eleven pm Sunday nights, New Zealand standard time.
(45:44):
Check out Newstalk SHADB dot co dot nz for local
frequencies or a link to the live stream. A big
thanks to New Zealand on Air for their ongoing support
and making the show. Take care and always remember that
the world is a better place with you in it.
Life it isn't easy, it is however worth it.
Speaker 1 (46:08):
MH for more from News Talk st B. Listen live
on air or online, and keep our shows with you
wherever you go with our podcasts on iHeartRadio
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