EP 544 - No Guest

No guest this week. Brought in Butch and Rizo and Carlos and Jessica came by from Amor Vegana with delicious tamale "cakes" that we devoured during the show. _________________________ LINKS (Instagram) Felipe - @ Felipeesparzacomedian Martin - @ comicmartinrizo Butch - @ butchescobar Hear about Felipe's tour dates, new merch drops & more by signing up @ http://felipesworld.com #comedy #felipeesparza

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:11):
Don't trying to rob, don't talk to We're not thinking WoT.

Speaker 2 (00:23):
No, No, I would sell that half for fifty sixty bucks. Probably,

(00:43):
I sell an ounce for like ninety to one hundred,
depending on who I'm selling it to. I try to
keep it low because that's the thing, man is. Weed's expensive,
Like even on the underground ship, it's still super expensive.
And it's like it doesn't need to be. People are
just getting ripped off.

Speaker 1 (00:58):
The funny this way we started it, but you hear
the song.

Speaker 2 (01:09):
I did hear the car see the cartoon either, I
saw the cartoon then we started.

Speaker 1 (01:14):
Okay, you should give the countdown next time, show the
cartoon because we didn't hear the cartoon either.

Speaker 2 (01:21):
Okay, what's up?

Speaker 1 (01:24):
Food podcast? What's up everybody?

Speaker 2 (01:27):
Man?

Speaker 1 (01:28):
What's up? Food podcast? They shut down fucking The Daily
Show with I don't even know his name, No, no,
the other one. They shut down Colbert, they shut down
Jimmy Kimmel. But we're still the voice of the people, bro.

(01:50):
And we know that our our First Amendment is being
challenge right now. But it's all right, people, because we
still have the Second Amendment. And actually we don't have
the Second Amendment here in California because we don't have
a right to carry in California because and it's not

(02:10):
because we voted for not to have a right to carry.
It's because when black people, the Black Panthers, decided to
walk around with shotguns and a South rye for the
city hall, white people got scared and say, man, no
more a snow more open and carry. So that's there
you have with people. It wasn't but because we said

(02:34):
we don't want guns open and carry. It because they
don't want black people to have them. And if black
people can't have them, no one can have them. Dude,
I learned from Yeah, bro, would you graduate high school?
Ronald McDonald's school.

Speaker 2 (02:50):
Bro?

Speaker 1 (02:52):
I wish bro, we got bullshit hair with a fresh haircut?

Speaker 2 (02:57):
Yeah, actually today I didn't shave this morning.

Speaker 1 (03:00):
You thought about that toin like a hair like.

Speaker 2 (03:07):
Because I don't even care about I look honestly like
I'm not a big Okay, try try a little bit.
I mean.

Speaker 1 (03:16):
A show, bro, I bathe I was.

Speaker 2 (03:19):
It was more hoping to get repetitive gigs at work.
But I don't care care to a point. I care
to a point like I don't care about if I'm
losing my hair. I don't care if like I'm getting
older looking. Yeah, moisturized finger would actually moisturizing. I should
be doing more because it's just promotes better skincare. But

(03:42):
I don't know, Bro, you're a merily man. You're just
like it's not that it's not have a girlfriend already,
Like I don't need to try anymore, you know, Like
that's it, that's really it. It's like, I'm like, she
likes me, so if you're like single, you would have
to Oh Bro, I'd be peacocking every day. That's what
they call it.

Speaker 1 (04:01):
Right me. In high school, I used to put on cologne.
Did you really? Hell? Yeah, bro? Because I had gym class.

Speaker 2 (04:07):
What did you wear?

Speaker 1 (04:08):
Your cardnoir took all sample, yeah, bro, and I took
quorum polo, English leather, old spice. After shave skull was
blue or blue?

Speaker 2 (04:28):
Where was it? Cool water?

Speaker 1 (04:29):
Cool water was blue?

Speaker 2 (04:30):
Cool water was the ship I used to see all.

Speaker 1 (04:33):
The poor man after shave by the way, cool water
right under Kara.

Speaker 2 (04:38):
If I could I wear that, if it still is.

Speaker 1 (04:40):
Around, my dad would wear jockey club.

Speaker 2 (04:43):
Oh my god, my dad wore a brew that ship.
Stung Brude is like strong.

Speaker 1 (04:48):
It's like alcohol, right because back when I was a kid,
there was more gift given of cologne because there was packages.
You gotta, you gotta, you get at the order end,
you get a load.

Speaker 2 (04:58):
Yeah sha, Do you remember old spice was not because
now it's soap and ship, But it was just an
after shape that came in that fucked up weird bottle.
Was was your card that cologne like the little ball.
It was black, it.

Speaker 1 (05:11):
Had and it was black and if you rub it.
And Armenian Genie came out a BMW bro promising.

Speaker 2 (05:20):
Everything yeah dude, and then he does all your coke
and goes back.

Speaker 1 (05:25):
In the bottom bro. Armenia had Mexicans. We showed a
lot of the thing similarities. Armenia theled to open up
their big chest and show off their hair and their chain,
and Mexican weled to open up our bottom chain and

(05:45):
show our bottom shape. We liked to open up our
bottom part of our shirt and short stomach.

Speaker 2 (05:50):
It's opposite. It's the opposite. That's solos really. But my grandfather,
like on my on my mom's side, he was like
from Mexico.

Speaker 3 (05:58):
Bro.

Speaker 2 (05:58):
He had like a big ass hairy chest dude and
he would like throw it to the lower button and
that thing would pop out like a bush and it
looked like it was like a sweat. It was like
an eighties bush on his chest.

Speaker 1 (06:09):
We used to get grossed out when we had a
barbecue as somebody's at the park the house and we
had there was an uncle with Harriot legs and he
was sat down and my brother were looking like looking
at each other, like, how come you're still wearing his
gorilla costume, Thermo wearing shorts, got a sweater and wearing

(06:30):
tube socks. Fucking muppet homie John McEnroe shorts, like gonna
be at the ghetto Wimbledon because his.

Speaker 2 (06:39):
Ball eighties and your balls would hang out and then
that liked I remember this, told me get older dude too.
I was like twelve and this guy in the park
was like an older man to me. He's probably he
would just be all, hey, I sat in some bubble
gum and then he do that and his ball would
see that.

Speaker 1 (06:59):
Wouldn't want to that's the good. I'm gonna do it.
I'm gonna do it to my wife tonight, at least
I get ready for that cheesy joke. I'm my Grandma.
The tis underwhere I have it take my test to
go out and go man. Look check this out. Speaking

(07:23):
of bubble gun Man, we got some people brought food
for us today.

Speaker 2 (07:27):
Look, I'm Motivate Ghana from Arizona.

Speaker 1 (07:30):
I'm Motia. I find him on Instagram. I'm more. The
little line is called an underscore for those other idiots
and virgana, and they.

Speaker 3 (08:02):
Everybody made him my everybody made put on my girl
for making punk it the miles years ago.

Speaker 1 (08:06):
Opened up that one.

Speaker 2 (08:10):
Bro, that one's cheese. I believe this.

Speaker 1 (08:16):
Yeah, let me see you put some little side. See
that right here? Can I get the knife here? You sign?

Speaker 2 (08:24):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (08:25):
Now try it out right here? Bro, here we go.
Let me I'm motherfucker. Bro, you're the knife. Bro, that's mine.

Speaker 2 (08:39):
I mean, I mean that one. I'm not serving to you.

Speaker 1 (08:41):
Oh my god, Bro, it's good.

Speaker 2 (08:43):
This fucking guy over here eating like an animal, Dude.

Speaker 1 (08:47):
I know, Bro, you're not out bro the fingers.

Speaker 2 (08:54):
I could, dude, like this is amazing. I can eat
the boss by itself. I'm meeting them with my hands
because that's how I don't think so. But okayed to
keep mine with eggs. But yeah, in the morning, Bro
breakfast with coffee, eggs and tomales is the best, dude

(09:18):
who feels me out there?

Speaker 1 (09:20):
It's really good. They're out a Phoenix, Arizona.

Speaker 2 (09:28):
Carlos and Jessica. Yes, I'm wonderful cooks. This is amazing mine, man,
let me try. I'm gonna try to cheese too though.
Oh my god, oh I've dropped your notes. I never
had the males. Okay, yeah, and just to show you, guys,

(09:52):
these are heart shaped. Yeah, they're heart shaped. If you
can see that they're heartshaped, that's amazing.

Speaker 1 (10:01):
They made it in a.

Speaker 2 (10:04):
In a bunch uh mold, Yeah, that's amazing. These are delicious,
by the way, Like I said, I could eat the
massa by itself it's so tasty.

Speaker 4 (10:17):
But with the ingredients was geez wonder good bro, good
little homie people.

Speaker 2 (10:29):
I can't say busting you guys. Can't be hating on
us eating in here, Dude, it's not You can't give
a big guys food and then just be like, oh yeah,
keep on with your with your podcast.

Speaker 1 (10:41):
I'll tell about what gate.

Speaker 2 (10:52):
Yeah, I'm I'm a partly around California twenty sixteen. It
was the worst. Uh, it was the worst.

Speaker 1 (11:00):
Tragedy.

Speaker 2 (11:01):
Ever it was it was a wind place giving for latinos.

Speaker 1 (11:04):
Bro. You know you go by Tomali had a Mexican market, Yeah,
and then you got you buy massa there. Okay, but
two places and another one served massa that didn't give
like this. It wouldn't it wouldn't cook.

Speaker 2 (11:18):
It was just the whole time.

Speaker 1 (11:20):
So it was too much water.

Speaker 3 (11:22):
Again, Massa was just not I guess they added too
much of like maybe like not enough of one ingredient
information twenty sixteen. Bro.

Speaker 2 (11:36):
Okay, uh, there's a there's a grocery store in Downy.

Speaker 3 (11:41):
There's usually that place gets packed like a huge line,
right and then like for some reason, it was just
a bad batch of fucking massa that wouldn't cook. And
these dude seriously like mostly southern California, they didn't have
that manage for things giving bro.

Speaker 2 (11:57):
Sixteen. Bro, you know what who I blamed Trump because
he probably it's some sort of this is to break
up Mexican families, dude, because nothing breaks up Mexican families
like showing up at the house.

Speaker 3 (12:14):
Dude, that starts divorces, domestic violence. Like imagine like a bro,
like family's fighting, like my mom died and it was.

Speaker 2 (12:22):
It was the end of Christmas because there I want
to try it out. Okay, I'm gonna read this. Uh Hey,
just so you guys, if you guys want to check
this out there and you want to you want something
my list, yeah, b yeah, Okay, check out a more

(12:42):
Ghana uh in Phoenix, Arizona. Check them out at a
more underscra under slash Vigana on Instagram and the more
Ghana too on Facebook. Asked for Carlos or Jessica the number.
Take this number down. You gotta get You're gonna want
this number, especially if you're in Phoenix, Arizona. Seven one

(13:05):
four six four four one six seven five. Uh morvi
Ghana at gmail dot com if you want to email
them again, that number is seven one four six four
four one six seventy five. Dude, do us a favor
because these people drove all the way out here to
bring us this food. Show them some love and go

(13:26):
and and and try their product. I swear to God,
I'm not just sitting here because I'm trying to shine
people on. This is absolutely delicious.

Speaker 1 (13:34):
Go check them out, man. There was a j Rod
version of that commercial. Bro.

Speaker 5 (13:39):
Hey, you know what Bro, fuck all the other Tomorrows. Bro,
my grandmam made tomorrow last night. I was like, fuck
that shit, Fuck this Pitolo bullshit. Go to a Morvi
Ghana and check out their food. They have the best
fucking tomalis.

Speaker 1 (13:58):
In the business. What somethful pocket? You heard it there? Man?
Speaking of Jay Rod. Bro. You know have a new girlfriend.
He's ten years older than him.

Speaker 2 (14:08):
Okay, exactly, the one that's a tattoo.

Speaker 1 (14:10):
Artist right here. Yeah?

Speaker 2 (14:11):
Yeah, Should I voice my concerns?

Speaker 1 (14:15):
Yes? Voice?

Speaker 2 (14:16):
Okay, please.

Speaker 1 (14:17):
You're a You're a inno. You just a bite. You're
a guy watching from the outside.

Speaker 2 (14:21):
I am a guy watching him in the outside, and
this is what I've been watching, Bro, And I like,
I have to bite my tongue because like.

Speaker 1 (14:26):
I like, you remind me of you and you run
away from home. Yes, yeah, totally, except if you were
on social media, you wouldn't. You would have put You
would have put out the bars and held out that
black and black.

Speaker 2 (14:38):
Oh I would have done.

Speaker 1 (14:40):
You would have said, this is a good hearty space.
It has a fucking I had a power outlet.

Speaker 2 (14:44):
I don't know your girlfriend, so I'm not trying to
throw shade. But what I will say is it's weird
to me that I watched you falling apart at one point,
Like to me, I thought he was falling apart because
he was posting pictures of people who had died are
committed suicide that were famous, like you would google them.
And then he throw up like like a grid that
when you google it and shows you pictures. So I

(15:06):
was watching this hoping, like I'm like, bro, like hang
in there, doggie, you know, like I know, like this
transition's gotta be weird for someone like him, you know.
And so I saw that happen. Then I saw some ads,
then I saw, oh yeah, there was some weird posts
with the joker. Then oh, then all of a sudden,

(15:28):
I see this girl pop up, which is dope, Bro,
you got a girl good for you? You know, Like
I don't, like, I just get concerned when someone jumps
into a relationship so quickly, dude. And then like, dude,
it was like one thing, it was just her in
the picture, then the next one she's in the background
and he's like, hey, who wants to give my girl

(15:48):
a tattoo? And then the next one, uh, she's getting
the tattoo, and then the next one, she's like, hey, fellas,
me and Jay Run are teaming up, and I'm like, whoa,
wait a minute, You're in on this now too, Like
that's a quick jump, dude. Like that's a quick ass job,
you know. Like I think, dude, in biting your partner

(16:11):
in to do things with you is great, but.

Speaker 1 (16:13):
You gotta like trust grow into it.

Speaker 2 (16:15):
You gotta grow into it, bro, Like, because you don't.

Speaker 1 (16:19):
Start off with merch.

Speaker 2 (16:21):
Yeah, start off with merch, but just see how she
is for the next five six years, dog, Like I
would say, after three maybe four years, if like things
are great, then throw her into your ship.

Speaker 1 (16:31):
Dude. Well that the baby mama girl he's talking about
with kids.

Speaker 2 (16:34):
I don't think so, bro kid, I have no clue.
Like one is weird to me because he was asking
for a tattoo for her and then all of a sudden,
she's a tattoo artist, and I'm like, doesn't she know
tattoo artists? But it's just to me, it's like, man,
I always worry about people who get fame, and then
all of a sudden there's a girlfriend, and then all
of a sudden, the girlfriend's in the background.

Speaker 1 (16:56):
Hold on, how was it.

Speaker 2 (16:59):
That's bro, This is somebody went back in time and
gave this to the Mayans. The Pilgrims, bro.

Speaker 1 (17:09):
Like the it's like the it's like the Spaniards showed
up with pumpkins and and then and then like putting
a pointed a gun. That Mayan guy goes, make me something,
you savage.

Speaker 2 (17:19):
Yeah, they put a musket. Musket bro. Because you know, heartshake.

Speaker 1 (17:25):
Because we didn't show we didn't talk too much about
the discovery of Mexico, but that's next on our history
of pools. But we know that the Mayans had already
had stew and they have Tomali's at that point. Tomali's. Bro. Yeah,
they had Tomali, but they didn't have like Tomaly like
we we now that tom were more like this. It
wasn't modernized Tomi with vegetables.

Speaker 2 (17:48):
Like from stuff. That's a whole messo America. Like, yeah,
they probably used the Massa would probably be a lot
heartier like this. It would be like real mealy hers

(18:09):
would be like go. It would probably like be like
some media type stuff. I really I'm gonna you know what,
I'm gonna look into what they ate like how they
ate it. Like, did they use a lot of spices
like we do now, mullet? Did they like spicy ship
like we like spicy ship, you know?

Speaker 1 (18:28):
But then you the mind did use more liquors. We
already had chocolate and over here.

Speaker 2 (18:35):
Oh you're right.

Speaker 3 (18:36):
It's funny when in Sweden their whole fucking their whole
identity is chocolate.

Speaker 2 (18:40):
Bro, fucking they got it from Mexico.

Speaker 1 (18:41):
Bro. Yeah, Bro, God, that was good.

Speaker 2 (18:45):
Bro, what it is really good? You forget vegan? That's well.
Here's the thing is. I buy Tomali's from the lady
down the street from me because they're pretty good. And
she puts a lot of meat because you know, sometimes
you buy them they got no meat in them?

Speaker 1 (18:57):
Can like with no nothing in a corner. Bro.

Speaker 2 (19:02):
I don't know. I don't know if I have a weirdo.
Always a fan of Massa like Massa. Like if it's
good Massa, I got your Massa.

Speaker 1 (19:09):
You need to put a.

Speaker 2 (19:11):
Lot of eating there, like Massa. One has lard, you
know what I mean?

Speaker 1 (19:13):
Yeah, yeah, man, I don't mind.

Speaker 2 (19:17):
I don't mind a lot of Massa. One has large.

Speaker 1 (19:18):
I really like cold, bro, eating a hard cold. Yeah,
I've had the malet, Bro, from the Lady in the corner,
and every time I ordered chicken and the chicken it
was good, but when I ordered pork, it was skimpy, bro.

Speaker 2 (19:40):
And that's the best time, alay.

Speaker 1 (19:43):
But I know that the lad now people are now
flavoring the massa too, like this one.

Speaker 2 (19:50):
There's like a chicken stock in here.

Speaker 1 (19:51):
Something underscore Ghana. They did. They had flavor to the
massa and a lot of people don't do that. Bro.
My mom bro will probably make went the crazy tomorrow
about to make you cry.

Speaker 3 (20:02):
Bro.

Speaker 1 (20:03):
Yeah, you know the can of the cat, you know,
the can of vegetables Libby's. Yeah, you know, I had
a peeth and corn my mom put in at the
mallets too, Okay, yeah, bro, so you'll be biting against
the line of being in there. That would make and
she would make it with chicken dogs. So my favorite

(20:25):
word of the ones that was just fucking cheese and nothing,
you know, because the chicken had all that ship.

Speaker 2 (20:33):
Bro.

Speaker 1 (20:33):
And and then I know that my mom invented Tamalet
chicken pop pie. She should have sucking gravy beach.

Speaker 2 (20:43):
So my mom gravy bombs, bro.

Speaker 1 (20:46):
I mean, be good though, now think about it.

Speaker 2 (20:48):
It would be good with gravy. She should.

Speaker 1 (20:51):
My mom was ahead of the game, but she didn't
have enough ingredients chicken. If she had a white friend
from from like a white train, a trash lady, she
would have said, rufaela. He would try to putting gravy
and my mom would have said, what's gravy?

Speaker 2 (21:08):
Who do I go?

Speaker 1 (21:09):
Then my mom and then she would have said, you
gotta get milk other than that, and my mom would
have just not still not making because because we we
need milk for that cereal we need milk for that bitch.
I don't think my mom would make it. Anything with
milk had water in it.

Speaker 2 (21:27):
Dog yeh.

Speaker 3 (21:29):
Man, I hate it when my mom used to make
pancakes of water bro like instead of milk.

Speaker 2 (21:34):
You know the on the pancay mix. Yeah, with water.

Speaker 1 (21:39):
They had a lot of kids.

Speaker 2 (21:40):
No just me. You know what I do with pancake mix.
I take the Captain Crunch berry crunch and I smashed
it up into the crumbs and then I pour that
into the mix.

Speaker 1 (21:53):
How many shots do you take? Baby shot soldier? People
have this guy man, he crushes up Marsa pans. That

(22:14):
sounds good.

Speaker 2 (22:15):
That's how that sounds, bro. I mean, think about what
you're gonna crush up and put into a battery. That's
pretty much what you could do. Waffles are amazing with
that ship in there. Okay.

Speaker 3 (22:25):
So two years ago we went to my my dad's
Thanksgiving dinner and like his wife makes okay, but the
best thing was the tamali, the strawberry tamalis, and they're
sucking the deserts were eating them. And after that we
asked her and then she's like, oh, yeah, next quick,
she put strawberry next quick as the fun and wait

(22:48):
in the what in the mass? It was good, but
then once I found out it was a sweet tom Yeah,
that's fine.

Speaker 2 (22:55):
It tasted good, Bro, it was. It tastes good. It
was fucking nest quick them strawberry strawberry is fucking god.

Speaker 1 (23:04):
It was good that, bro, But tell my father the
same way like you did, Bro. At a party, I
asked what it was, and then when they told me
what it was, I never ate again. You know, even
though it was good, God, you're like that a ton
of it. They make strawberry jello with fucking regular sour
cream and then they pature with strawberries. Dog it tasted good, dude,

(23:29):
but pucked all that. Dude. I just think I kept
thinking the but in my head, I don't know there's
more sour quam when I eat tacos. I don't know
there's more soron queen when I eat fucking here. I
have like a monkey eating the whole thing, killing it,
killing him man.

Speaker 3 (23:46):
Because you're supposed to get like, okay, the same thought
process me, like you put twos of strawberry next work,
how many spoonfuls of next work war than the whole thing?

Speaker 1 (23:56):
Bro?

Speaker 2 (23:56):
Yeah, dude, we're getting I felt like, yeah, but for
clouds as the grill, some spam and cubes. Uh tossed
the can of le.

Speaker 1 (24:07):
Gross already, bro, the smull can. That's all girls already scrunches.
The guy is this fool eating outside of a fucking
car salvage place. What is this guy doing? You know what?
This was eating that with a with a with a
key chain with two hundred keys in them.

Speaker 2 (24:26):
Bro, he had me spam but lost me a veg.

Speaker 1 (24:30):
We were just vegiar and Libby's. Libby's vegan is the
one that comes with peas.

Speaker 2 (24:36):
I don't like that ship.

Speaker 1 (24:38):
Yeah. And then it was but see there's there was
throwing one burned green bean that's like this one long one.
They always nobody had opened that jar and cooked it. Right,
my mom has over cooked it, Bro, that's all the peas.
Let the money bunch them.

Speaker 2 (24:53):
Did your mom know how to cook?

Speaker 1 (24:55):
She could cook Mexican food, but when it came to
like Mexican American food or Chinese food, man, people will
eat that tler and that where their language will go
back where she came from. Oh wow, Chinese.

Speaker 3 (25:09):
Your mom only tried to cook Chinese fo because my
mom's never tried to cook Chinese food.

Speaker 2 (25:12):
My mom could cook, but she hated cooking, but she
could cook good.

Speaker 1 (25:16):
She didn't good enough beating like my mom.

Speaker 2 (25:18):
Bro. My mother and never had a husband, so she
never got the beatings. Bro. I think my mom for
the beatings and was like, cook it yourself. My mom
probably got beat too much over cooking. I'm never cooking
for you because once I learned how to cook, she's
all you know, I'm never cooking for you again.

Speaker 1 (25:34):
And I was like, if my mom had a choice,
she would only have three kids.

Speaker 2 (25:38):
Bro.

Speaker 1 (25:38):
I think the other four were like a sexual assault
sye because there was County scepters hitting all over my house.
I swear to God, but I don't think she wanted
seven being pregnant every other year. Who then wants that?
I swear to God, Bro, I always think that it
was three pregnancies and four sexual assaults.

Speaker 2 (25:57):
That's that's like it. That's all Grandma's in Mexico.

Speaker 1 (26:01):
That's our seven kids bring in America with one joberent
who should be better than I know?

Speaker 3 (26:08):
Bro?

Speaker 2 (26:09):
I have one kid and I could barely like like,
I'm like, how did how these people do it?

Speaker 1 (26:14):
Hey? Who kind of marcha bullshes? Is that to? I'll
do the neighbor, bro? With kids?

Speaker 2 (26:19):
Oh my god?

Speaker 1 (26:20):
Italian nobody. Italians will have ten kids, but Irish people nine?

Speaker 2 (26:25):
Yeah? Mormons all looking out the window, y'all he has
five kids? Lit, Honey, get over there.

Speaker 1 (26:30):
You know the justin fire off on the same dad,
the same assault her.

Speaker 2 (26:37):
He's still assaulting, Bro. It doesn't matter. He's still something.

Speaker 1 (26:40):
No woman alivebant to have thirteen kids or nine or eight?

Speaker 2 (26:43):
How's my grandma, Grandma?

Speaker 1 (26:44):
I mean, how many you have?

Speaker 2 (26:46):
My grandma had like at least fourteen kids? Grandma? Right
now about it? Nothing about it for sure.

Speaker 3 (26:51):
Those she did she probably yeah, she only wanted like, hope,
my mom, what if you found.

Speaker 1 (26:56):
Out that how many? How many men are in that
family though?

Speaker 3 (27:00):
So when my grandpa died in nineteen seventy five, they
all moved to Los Angeles and they all grew up
out here.

Speaker 2 (27:05):
So Theo John, TiO, Fernie, Juan Deo, George.

Speaker 1 (27:09):
Uh, they're all that that the order.

Speaker 2 (27:12):
Yeah, so there's their fire.

Speaker 1 (27:13):
They're trying for a girl.

Speaker 2 (27:14):
They're trying to forgre out them.

Speaker 1 (27:15):
The women is my mom, Gina, everyone after the first
woman who in a solid bro.

Speaker 2 (27:22):
Yeah, yeah, when did you find out? You talked to
grandpa and he's all, no, I wanted to relax. It
was a good grandma. Say it was a hornball.

Speaker 1 (27:34):
Broun say some hetero sexual ship like you can see
what do you guys have? Man, you gonna have capable
I don't think to watch.

Speaker 2 (27:43):
So I maybe a screen in front of him.

Speaker 1 (27:46):
Yeah, hbo, I have big I have big fucking loose.

Speaker 2 (27:50):
Mad Your grandma would have less kids than social media
is around.

Speaker 6 (27:58):
Bro.

Speaker 1 (27:58):
Imagine bro, that animal well work for fuck it? Just
say he worked from seven am to five Go home,
drink drink, eat, probably have sex and I maybe and
then wake up in the morning do the game?

Speaker 2 (28:13):
Bro get ripped, ripped?

Speaker 1 (28:15):
He get ripped in the middle, and I'd be like,
all these guys are ripped or on the weekend, Bro,
was your dad one of the dads that would you
would never see this after Friday, Thurday and Sunday.

Speaker 2 (28:23):
No, my dad, you know my dad? He was he
was He was cool because he would drink, but he
didn't get like he wasn't He would, but you wouldn't noticed.
My dad hides drunk very well to this day, like,
so we never knew. I was always like, because that
was the thing is actually the other guys drink. I'd
be like, why is he acting like that?

Speaker 1 (28:41):
Your grandma fourteen kids were? How tall was she?

Speaker 2 (28:43):
I'm I was like, sure, dude, rest in peace. So
I remember my ex same dude, right, same dude?

Speaker 3 (28:49):
No, actually, okay, So there's when my grandpa died in
nineteen seventy five.

Speaker 2 (28:53):
My grandpa died a motcyclacks twenty five.

Speaker 1 (28:57):
And here you have any kids there, how much you
can fourteen?

Speaker 2 (29:01):
No?

Speaker 3 (29:01):
No, not yet, So I'll tell you what happened. So
my grandpa died in a more cycle accident, right, and
then after.

Speaker 2 (29:06):
That, my grandma.

Speaker 3 (29:08):
The only person that was a comfort comforting my grandma
was my grandpa's brother. He got my grandma pregnant two times.

Speaker 2 (29:20):
So what's going what's going on.

Speaker 1 (29:22):
With my grandprother fitting diary here?

Speaker 2 (29:25):
My grandpa's brother got his grandma.

Speaker 3 (29:28):
My grandpa's brother made two more babies with my grandma
after and they're, uh, wait, your grandpa's brother.

Speaker 2 (29:34):
Yeah, when my grandpa died, When your grandpa died, your
grandpa's brother swooped in, moved in on my grandma and
was like, let me tap twice.

Speaker 1 (29:41):
Yes, there was only one woman in that town.

Speaker 2 (29:42):
Bro, I gotta know just to be bro. B here's
here's a good looking woman and back in the day,
he bro so, so my girlfriend has three kids. So
I'm all four dating people with kids. But if you
were like, hey, how many kids you got? Twelve? My
grandma alone, Bro, I'm questioning your own gun, right, Bro,

(30:09):
he's warm. I don't know, Bro, he's warm. He was like,
let me hear it was probably cold one night, Bro,
they need to do it.

Speaker 3 (30:16):
It was up in the fucking in the in the
hills for the cents.

Speaker 2 (30:21):
Holding gets out there Mexico.

Speaker 1 (30:24):
In Christmas, I met a girl at Walka Yoti's and
that girl had nine kids and she looked like you
could have you could have another fourteen with her.

Speaker 2 (30:35):
She looks like she's still ready for.

Speaker 1 (30:37):
And I don't even know the nine kids were from
the same guy, but I just know she had nine
kids and she was not even thirty five yet had
one kid.

Speaker 2 (30:47):
My cousin. My cousin's like that. She had like she
started having kids at like thirteen, and it was like,
oh no, you know, Divina has a kid. She's thirteen.
And then it was like fourteen, Oh no, she's gonna
have another kid. And then like I remember, like eight,
sixteen or seventeen, she was still having kids.

Speaker 1 (31:04):
We were like shit about her. Bro it's called alien.
In nineteen seventy five.

Speaker 2 (31:10):
Interaction, she's lesbian. Now can you see your feature? No,
I'll show you that. Oh shit, I don't care.

Speaker 1 (31:24):
Remember Fumi once.

Speaker 2 (31:29):
Seriously, dude, but for me fourteen times one.

Speaker 1 (31:32):
On food podcast, Man, welcome to the Wants Some Food Podcast.
We have buschasketball right here. Rodrigo right now, he's in
sabbattle go. He's folding shirt somewhere we got Martin Rizzo
right here from the Fucking It's Not Ready podcast, co
hosts of The Most and The Food's Got Talent, Fool's

(31:53):
Got Talent? I got you actually saw I actually got
to see The Fool's Got Talent. And it's actually like
a food talent show where there's judges and imagine when
you watch American Guy Idol, American Guy Idol, Got Talent,
America Got Talent, American Idol and Last Common Standing.

Speaker 2 (32:13):
Yeah, it's almost like like a ghetto, like like a
Patrollo and then.

Speaker 1 (32:18):
They show they they show like the people who because
then what happened with Last Coming with the Last Coming
Standing and American Idol and America Got Talent and that
they like to show the goofballs broke, the one with
a big personality, but I don't know talent.

Speaker 2 (32:38):
But they're like like Marjorie Taylor Green.

Speaker 1 (32:40):
They're striking you there, yeah, striking.

Speaker 2 (32:43):
Yeah, she did like one of those for American Idol.

Speaker 1 (32:46):
She did.

Speaker 2 (32:47):
Yeah, if you look up Marjorie Taylor Green American Idol,
there's her like, Hi, I'm showing so from California, and
you can tell she's like those are the phone.

Speaker 1 (32:57):
And she sang. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (32:59):
Well, I don't know if she's sang, but she They
did it like like a post interview, and I don't
know if they showed her. Maybe they did show her singing.

Speaker 1 (33:08):
That's sad. I thought you'd like, I thought you'd be
juggling like dumbbell or something. Anyway, people were getting off
the track here. We're not talking about MTG. We're talking
about TMT T and T. So this last Monday, myself
and Martin Rizzo we opened up for Cuckoo, who was

(33:31):
having this podcast. Who sang with a little hard piano
ship Oh yeah. And it was amazing. Man, the Greek
theater people, the players were snunk in to watch run DMCA,
fish Bone and Beastie Boys on one concert.

Speaker 2 (33:48):
It's such a bad Did you see the deer outside
eating by the grass?

Speaker 3 (33:54):
It was insane.

Speaker 1 (33:56):
No, but I saw deer wearing a boutlet Google shirt
bro outside it tackle him, Bro.

Speaker 2 (34:02):
It was.

Speaker 3 (34:02):
It was such a crazy concert. Google has a crazy
fan base. And it was cool seeing you there because
like I was like, I don't even gonna be there
until I saw the lineup.

Speaker 2 (34:10):
Were you there too, You're nervous? I was.

Speaker 3 (34:12):
I was doing the who's that talent show there? Because
we opened up the show and then he did the
samon Oh should you do it live?

Speaker 2 (34:19):
Yeah, we did it live. I got to see that.

Speaker 1 (34:22):
Yeah, wears like he wears a mask, so you know
they so yeah.

Speaker 2 (34:29):
The middle one a couple of times viral on Instagram,
so I brought that. You know, we do it live.
You know, I try addition for it, and it's just
I fucking.

Speaker 1 (34:38):
Love that you do that. Bro penny Wise and the
hood brow and show up throwing his oil pederl Wise.
That's what I call it, barrel Wise. So that's the
character that went viral. And the other character, the blind Guy,
went viral too.

Speaker 2 (34:50):
Right, Yeah, homeboys, I remember him.

Speaker 1 (34:52):
I remember that. When I.

Speaker 2 (34:54):
The blind guy, it was fun. Dude, Sucking the Greek
was fun.

Speaker 3 (34:59):
We to go eat at the secret location downstairs.

Speaker 1 (35:03):
Oh yeah, bro, when the it was catering that ass food.

Speaker 2 (35:08):
Bro, Bro, did they have for us?

Speaker 1 (35:12):
No?

Speaker 2 (35:12):
I don't know for us. They didn't say anything, Bro.
We just went in there ate it. But it was fun.
It's funny because I've always dropped people off.

Speaker 3 (35:19):
When I used to do lyft, like back in the day,
like three years ago, I'd alwaysdrop people off there, pick
up people there.

Speaker 2 (35:24):
But I never went to the Greek theater. It was cool, man.
My first time was up.

Speaker 1 (35:30):
Were you nervous about your show?

Speaker 2 (35:31):
I was. I was nervous for some reason.

Speaker 1 (35:33):
Yeah, me too, How nervous about people getting back about
like because it's being too hardcore and because I'm not
I'm not like my ship is dark Bro, because because
because I don't want to hurt people saying because.

Speaker 3 (35:49):
When Yeah, because when you do your shows, you know
what your fans are there for you. But these were
Cougo's fans, you know, so you don't know how. I
don't know Cuckoo.

Speaker 1 (35:55):
I just saw Bro.

Speaker 2 (35:57):
It's like it's like Beau. He like hearted, very like,
like he's alternative rock, like like I know you did
like comedy for bad buddy audiences. You could curse probably
and be crazy, right, but it's Cuco a different vibe.

Speaker 1 (36:12):
Than that, or no, he loves on comedy.

Speaker 2 (36:15):
Oh then I would have been like fucking doing the
underwear joke, dude.

Speaker 3 (36:21):
But I think I think you kind of maybe got
like a little PTSD from when you did the Queen
Mary Show.

Speaker 2 (36:27):
Yeah, and like people were fucking like this home was better, though,
I like this one better.

Speaker 1 (36:31):
Dude. They were all over it.

Speaker 2 (36:36):
That's great.

Speaker 1 (36:36):
So anyway, if you're watching right now, I said yes
to open up for Cucoat because I'm performing at the
Greek Theater in June of twenty twenty six. Big news. Nice,
So I wanted to promote it right, but you couldn't
film too much at the Greek. So LISTA made this

(36:57):
cut off this posters this big that was ai that
looked like me. I'm a guy eating a hot dog
and I'm wearing the same sweatshirt as I did on stage,
and I cut off board. So I have forty bucks
on me, one hundred and twenty bucks. So I'm gonna
tell the hot dog vendors if I could put the
sign under cart so when people buy hot dogs they

(37:19):
could click on the logo mistake, and then they can
see that I'm performing in the week. And then when
they go like this, oh no, I keeps the and
then they use the paper later.

Speaker 2 (37:29):
Smart fuck we do.

Speaker 1 (37:31):
So I had three collars pay that lady forty bucks.
So I'm walking up the hill, bro, and then this
guy pulls over what's up food? And then that fool says,
oh bro, what's up, bro? Are you doing?

Speaker 2 (37:46):
Man?

Speaker 1 (37:47):
I just came from the concert. I was gonna go
over there and talk to the hot dog guys. Did
you watch the show? Bro? Those are my hot dog guys.
I got my dad, my brother, my mom aren't there whatever,
they're brough they're shy dog. So he said, go for it, bro.
So I had three posters. I gave him one, and

(38:10):
then I gave the family one and they right away
put it on there by the by the sodas, and
the other guy put it on there. So everybody was
walking out of the concert, they could see my poster
and once they click on the on the on the barcode,
it shows Filippes, Parda and up and they'll get alert
when tickets are for sof So anyway, I pay that

(38:31):
lady forty bucks. Forty bucks. He told me that these
foods are there every tether's a concert. So I told her, Bro,
hit me up, and I'm gonna be there on Tuesdays.
They're gonna put my poster there and they.

Speaker 2 (38:43):
Go, oh, whoa, that's a good business idea for them
to to advertise on the sides of those things. Yeah,
like that's a good idea. Dude, I never thought about that.

Speaker 1 (38:55):
Especially in front of that place, because we already got
a bunch of clicks, Bro from the concert. That's the
people are clicking on it. That's good, dude, So they
look that was Bro, that's great. I don't know where
I was gonna put it, but I see hot Dogs,
so fucking nobody ever hot Dogs and the mom and baugh.

Speaker 2 (39:14):
So just put it right there, bro, and there and
there you said, they're there.

Speaker 1 (39:17):
That's the future right there.

Speaker 2 (39:18):
And is this the Greek Theater? Yeah, performing performing, but
you used to go watch shows there and stuff.

Speaker 1 (39:25):
Was not getting there to watch run DMC him the
Beastie Boys.

Speaker 2 (39:30):
I remember first time I did, like I mean, I did,
I tell you with you, but I remember doing a
big the big theater with you. To me, it was
the Warfield and you asked me to do the Warfield
with you, and it was like, holy funk.

Speaker 1 (39:43):
Bro, who is that?

Speaker 2 (39:44):
That's in San Francisco and I every every band I've
ever liked, I went to go see at the Warfield.
The best to watch an outdoor theater.

Speaker 1 (39:56):
The Jimmy Henry performed there.

Speaker 2 (39:57):
Jimmy Hendricks performed there doors the Doors, Grateful Dead like it.
It was like really good being there, bro, because it's
also just a dope theater to watch. I iced to
watch Cypress Hill there, like, yeah, dude, that's what we did. Yeah,
we did it together.

Speaker 1 (40:17):
What was her name was there, Marcella?

Speaker 2 (40:21):
No, it was Marcella's homie. Shout out to Uh, oh
my god, she's my friend.

Speaker 1 (40:27):
I'm just having a they were they were there have
a dog the Will Popovich the Worfield Theater. They have
a dog that just walks around like everybody compete. But
the catering is good there too.

Speaker 2 (40:41):
Yes, the catering was good. The dog was dope. And
then they there's a guy that just loves that he
works there, but he takes you around and shows you
all the dope signatures because everybody signs the walls back there,
and then shows you the heating system, which is pretty dope.
It's just like a big furnace that shoots hot air
underneath the seats. Yeah, it's pretty dope, dude. It's like,

(41:02):
but to me, it was just an honor to be
there because like I've been to show's there. Yeah you know,
and it's like it must be a trip. You're like,
it was a trip bro. It was a real trip.
That one was dope, dude, Thank you, thank you.

Speaker 1 (41:14):
What's up? Full podcast?

Speaker 2 (41:16):
Man?

Speaker 1 (41:17):
I'm reading all your comments. I like them all forty
six people.

Speaker 2 (41:21):
You guys are doing great in the comments. Are you
guys said that they shut down a figure on the street?

Speaker 1 (41:26):
They did?

Speaker 2 (41:28):
You mean the hooks? The hookers? Yeah, they're not there anymore.
They moved them or I don't know where they're at anymore.

Speaker 3 (41:32):
So the Olympics, Olympics maybe, you know, I just I
kind of missed the tension I used to get from
them flirting with me, you know, while I was stuck
in traffic.

Speaker 1 (41:43):
You know, I know I used to we have I
never saw them there, I never it was. They're here too?

Speaker 2 (41:52):
Are they really that nice? Never seen them? Yeah, I've
never seen them here. I've seen because I live over
by you, so I see those two. We have East
fourteenth in Oakland and like near the like twenties, it
starts to like, you know, hookers everywhere. Yeah, you guys
gots beat. Dude, there's a fun ton in Oakland. I

(42:14):
in good looking or is it just like in number? No,
just in number. It looks probably too but you know,
like yeah, yeah, it's it's but it's a bus. It's
probably a bus. They'll be back, bro.

Speaker 1 (42:27):
There was a bus in Figueroa, though not like last month.
They cut like three pimps from I think they were
from Rolling sixties. Really, I don't know what gang they're from,
but they're from the local crip or blood gang. No,
my bad, Grave Street and you can look it up. Man,
they cut the pimps.

Speaker 2 (42:48):
I think it all starts out there like figure like
I never and I.

Speaker 1 (42:52):
Didn't know that rampant there. Man, that was a lot
of fake.

Speaker 3 (42:55):
No, no, it's I used to drive down there just
to go home, like from like Hollywood and dude, during.

Speaker 1 (43:02):
The daytime, my friend and they used to be in
Vegas masking for him. How much are they any?

Speaker 2 (43:07):
Very due? There's expensive.

Speaker 1 (43:09):
Well, he used to live in masking for him.

Speaker 3 (43:11):
Here you can get like a fifty bucks like a
hand job, dude.

Speaker 2 (43:14):
I think it's like, okay, so twenty.

Speaker 1 (43:16):
Bucks of hand fifty book for a hand job.

Speaker 2 (43:19):
I know this, but on the street it's about twenty
to thirty bucks for a blowjob. They don't do hand jobs. Yeah,
it's a it's a it's about one hundred to Bang,
and then if they have a hotel room, it's about
one hundred and fifty. If they're upscale, you can look
at like two to three hundred dollars. If they're in
Vegas and they're upscale, you're looking at upwards of like

(43:40):
two thousand dollars money wrench style. Yeah, Buddy ranch is cheaper.
It's probably like three or four bills. It's still expensive
Bunny Ranch. To me, it was like I didn't do
any of that stuff. You know, I'm doing that stuff now.
When I was younger, I dabbled and I remember like,
because you know they got the ones in San Francisco,
you read book them bro, like there's some legit ones

(44:01):
in there. And then I remember my buddy going to
the Bunny Rams, like we.

Speaker 1 (44:04):
Went with him. When they saw you his bodyguard, we
convinced them that he was rich. But red Book or
back page.

Speaker 2 (44:13):
Book, red Book was old school bro red book red Book.
See it's controversial because, like I think it was like
a good thing because the ladies were allowed to put
their pictures up and there was a rating system. They
had a screen like it was kind of like the
Penny Saver. It was after like it was after a
Craigslist and the ladies kind of like they didn't need
pimps no more because you had to be verified too,

(44:36):
And then like a lot of them would be like, hey,
if you want to come over, you got to have
a rating from other ladies, and so like, uh, it's
safer like that. And it's safer because then you see
their ratings and we could tell if they're safe, and
then their ratings your ratings were up too. And then
the other thing is is like just they would call,
you know, well, let me call this lady to verify,

(44:57):
you know, stuff like that. And then the FBI came
in the rest of the guy who made it and
cleared it out. And now women are back to how
needing pimps. Yeah, and then even worse because these are
getting worse now, you know. Like I was just reading
about it, and then I was talking to a lady
who was a former Lady of the night and she
was like, it's not even worth it anymore after Red Book,

(45:20):
Like really, it just got worse and then now it's
just getting work. How much money does like a pimp
take it? Really? Kind of yeah, it's not it's not
like a commercial agent, no, Okay.

Speaker 1 (45:30):
Here, you're for a pimp, go read this book called
Iceberg Slim.

Speaker 2 (45:36):
If I was.

Speaker 1 (45:36):
If I was, let's just.

Speaker 2 (45:38):
Say, let's says I was your manager and slash agent,
which is what a pimp kind of is. But I
would take all your money. You'd have to live with me.
You'd have to we're talking about acting. If you're a comic,
you'd have to do comedy anywhere. I tell you to
do anytime, even for me, by myself, and if you don't,
I'll beat the fuck out of you. And then when

(45:59):
you want something and you've been good at buy it free, okay.
And if you keep doing what you're doing, then you
can stay at the front of the stall. But if
you keep sucking up, you go to the back of
the stall. And know the back of the stall, you
get the shitty work, you get the low pay, you
get treated like ship, you get to eat less because
like a pimp actually has a stall of hose, you know,

(46:20):
like a stable, like a number of them, and like,
uh so it depends.

Speaker 1 (46:26):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (46:26):
When we did that and Felipe did the history of
pimping and hoen and he learned a lot.

Speaker 6 (46:32):
Bro.

Speaker 3 (46:33):
Yeah, it was like yeah, okay, So what if you're like,
you're just trying to you're just trying to be a
prostitute without a pimp.

Speaker 2 (46:42):
What happens and they catch you like trying to do
that on the corners on the ship. So if I'm
pimping and you're pimping on the same block, I got
to kill you now, Okay.

Speaker 3 (46:51):
So what about trying to be on independent contract there
no pimp and I'm just trying to sell my buffalo?

Speaker 2 (46:56):
Oh no fucking up, bro, because I'll beat you into
the making me be your pim. Yeah, I'll pull you
off the street, put you in my car, take you
back to my pad, beat the fuck out of you.
Because you're not gonna call the cops for kidnapping or anything.
You're gonna just try to get away. But if you
do that, I might kill you. So for at some
point you're gonna be like.

Speaker 1 (47:15):
But they were like, but it's all psychological too. It's
like it's like, just say you're hungry, but you ever
eating in days? Right? Yeah, this guy feeds you good, bro, Okay,
and then he starts feeding but he starts feeding you right,
But then but then you don't see him for three

(47:37):
more days. You don't see him for three more days, right,
you don't see the motherfucker about three more days. They're
hungry again. But now he tells you if you're going
to go in that room with that fat motherfucker in there,
there's a slice of cake. Yeah, and then he goes,
and then you go there and have sex for that cake.
And then a pim keeps all the money. And you
never think about the money.

Speaker 2 (47:59):
The cake.

Speaker 1 (48:00):
You never think about the money. You thinking about the
you're thinking about eating.

Speaker 2 (48:02):
If I want to get rid of you, you addicted
to drugs first, then then once you addicted to drugs,
I can control you. Don't want you to watch out.
I just leave you in the street for someone to take.

Speaker 1 (48:13):
Tell them to about the gambo.

Speaker 2 (48:15):
That sounds like a horrible fucking business.

Speaker 1 (48:18):
The geek, Oh, the geek, about the geek. What was
the name of that movie, n Paradise Alley?

Speaker 2 (48:25):
Yeah, the geek. Bro.

Speaker 1 (48:27):
So remember remember the circus.

Speaker 2 (48:29):
This is a real thing.

Speaker 1 (48:31):
In the circus.

Speaker 2 (48:32):
There's the side shows.

Speaker 1 (48:33):
The side shows like the Bearded Lady. Yeah, back and
then like wild Man.

Speaker 2 (48:37):
Back in the thirties and forties, probably even before that,
it would be like come see the wild Man. I
think we would all be in Silent circus and thirties
of the comics. We look different.

Speaker 1 (48:48):
You look like the yeah you take yeah kind of
stomach bro.

Speaker 2 (48:52):
Come see the lever aging lesbian. Yeah yeah, the weird yeah,
the weird mamboy, you know, like yeah. So they had
this guy that was he was called the we would
have drugs, half man, half monster. And you come in
this ring and it's like a donut and he's down,
deep down in the middle. He stinks because he's they
haven't bathed him. He smells like ship. He's all fucked

(49:15):
up because you're about to find out why.

Speaker 1 (49:17):
And what they do is.

Speaker 2 (49:20):
Throw a chicken in the fucking in the thing. They
don't even need to get him alcoholic then and then
he grabs the chicken and he eats it in front
of people, and he rips it apart with his teeth
and then like, because he's all fucked up, his face
is all bloody and muddy, and then they while they're shocked,
and then they leave right But the reality is is that,

(49:40):
like Felipe said, he's either drunk or they get him
to be a drunk, Like they'll hire him and go, hey,
we need a maintenance guy here. Here's three beers in
your pay. Here's four beers. That's something. And then once
you get him addicted to alcohol, you start putting uh morphine,
morphine or a lot of them in there, fucking in
their alcohol. And if that ship is super freaks, they

(50:02):
started to get addicted and now they need.

Speaker 1 (50:04):
It and now and now like he he walked up
to him all night. Listen, Man, I know you do
maintenance here, but we lost the geek the geek right away.
And I mean it pays good, you know, it pays
better than when you do. And maybe you do it
for a couple of days, you know, but by that
time you're hooked. Bro, it's out doing it for a

(50:25):
couple of days.

Speaker 2 (50:26):
Man, just a couple of days.

Speaker 1 (50:28):
Then I pull down there like a dirty ass chicken, bro,
a dirty motherfuck with like an animal. And then like
he just living in occasion now, bro, and the guy
just throw chickens at him. So he finally escapes, right.
So in that movie, Bradley Cooper, he was a con
man through the whole movie, and he fucked a lot
of people over. He was a guy that used to

(50:48):
get people's birthdays and he would talk to the dance
and then they figured him anyway, his life was shitty now,
so they explained everything like we did about the geek
with him. Yeah, he looks at that guy goes, I
was born for this.

Speaker 2 (51:08):
Need to be our geek. And he goes and he's
all fucked up now and all cracked out. I was
born for this. I talked to Believe about that movie
because we saw it around the same time. How many
comics are like that?

Speaker 1 (51:22):
I was like all of us, Hell, yeah, bro, you
show you you show to a comedy club the first time,
your first time, you're headlining, and then the fucking comedy
owner tells you let's go to the borrow passed off
flyers and you do you know why? Yeah, you've done
it because you were born for that. But then after
you learn you don't do it. Yeah, yeah, he shocks

(51:46):
this guy.

Speaker 2 (51:47):
Un sure. We start out his geeks and we kind
of moved our way up. But yeah, so barn and
Bailey used to do that then, for sure, probably bro,
but it was probably lesser circus Barna and Bailey had
his own.

Speaker 1 (51:56):
Not Barney and Bailey. But I'm pretty sure the guy
who rhng the freak was for him.

Speaker 2 (52:00):
Yeah, yes, yes, exactly, yes.

Speaker 1 (52:04):
Like that like like ship, bro, they'll put a little
person inside of a jar, bro, half dead.

Speaker 2 (52:11):
Well I heard I heard that back in the day.

Speaker 3 (52:12):
Like they would have Filipinos and cages, bro.

Speaker 2 (52:15):
Yeah, they would have jews with black people, Indian Native
Americans like you know, still in their garb. They even
had like, yeah, a Filipino child. That's crazy. It's like
because nobody's.

Speaker 1 (52:26):
Half they have everybody there, Bro. They would have a
like these people who lived in the city the nearest
T shirt like that. They don't have a white a
dirty white couple will just stand there and say they're farmers,
right yeah yeah, no, no fig fake farm Bro. They
have two white people died in there, like they're farmers

(52:47):
from Arkansas. They were the Filipinos from the those the
Pecanese or.

Speaker 2 (52:52):
Yeah this is on Coney Island.

Speaker 1 (52:54):
Yeah, I mean the dude.

Speaker 2 (52:59):
About this one. Barnum Bailey had a black lady who
was probably the old all this black lady and the
oldest lady.

Speaker 1 (53:06):
You know what he said, She who's who's fucking Who's
fucking made he she was?

Speaker 2 (53:13):
It was it was his nanny. It was George Washington's
nanny and we're talking nineteen.

Speaker 1 (53:19):
Like wait, what was that early ninetel two two?

Speaker 2 (53:22):
Right?

Speaker 1 (53:23):
Don't so she had to be like hundreds three years old.

Speaker 2 (53:29):
Yeah, yeah, exactly live a long time, bro, more than that, right,
but yeah.

Speaker 1 (53:34):
Like it was more than that.

Speaker 2 (53:36):
I think it was more like it was like but
it was like nobody lived that long, especially at the
her man but like, yeah, she was like black lady. Yeah,
and there's a story about her and everything. I think
there's a book about her actions.

Speaker 1 (53:48):
And then when she died, that was showing up her bones.

Speaker 2 (53:50):
Bro. Yes, that's right. They had to get him to
stop showing her bones due like they kind of had
to plead with him and be like, enough is enough,
let this woman rest. I'm looking at I'm looking at
stuff like that.

Speaker 1 (54:04):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (54:04):
Barnum Bailey with Toy's Head was was an enslaved African
American woman who was featured in a widely publicized hoax
by P. T.

Speaker 2 (54:11):
Barnum, Oh my Barnum after her death, so fuck dude,
because he had a freak couch before he had a shirt.

Speaker 3 (54:16):
Barnum claim Head was one hundred and sixty one year
old and had been Washington George Washington's nurse.

Speaker 1 (54:23):
Her age called Oddities and something.

Speaker 2 (54:27):
So it was barnum. What the fuck with barnum? Those
guys are animals, bro, Yeah, dude. He had like a
like a huge like I don't know what, Like it
was like a three story building like a Ripley's yeah.

Speaker 1 (54:40):
Ship.

Speaker 2 (54:41):
Yeah, like there'd be one whole like area was all
elephants lines inside. Bro.

Speaker 1 (54:46):
Bro. They would have they will say they have a
fucking they have a baby, a baby vampire insteade of
a jar. But all it was like maybe like a
half It was probably like a little person miscarriage, like
a midget miscarriage. And did you put him in a jar?

(55:08):
Yeah it was a bat boy or something.

Speaker 2 (55:11):
Yeah, yeah, or they would they would augmented. I remember
though being a kid too. And this is probably the
end of this part. Did you ever go to like
fairs and stuff and they had the freak shows they
had like the had a dog and a jar. Oh yeah, bro,
Like I remember going to see the largest alligator for
a dime. Okay, see stuff like that, But I don't
know about it had like it didn't have any live

(55:33):
like anything that broke racial laws by this time. But
there was like a two headed calf. Uh. There was
a jar that I saw in Mexico. They had stuff
like that that I was scared of. Sea show. There
was the carcass of liver lizard. Boy was I saw
that and I don't think it was real, but it
was like it was. It was like a kid sitting there,
but he was covered in like scales like a lizard.

(55:56):
That shit was weird, bro, But I bug my dad.
I begged him, was like, I'll fucking lead the entire
yard if you just pay. I think it was like
three bucks to do it or something. Because circus is okay.
So I remember, Yeah, going to circuses as a.

Speaker 1 (56:09):
Kid, you go to circus Bargas or Brothers VOD.

Speaker 3 (56:13):
I don't want to ringing brothers, not that I probably
didn't go to regular brothers, but it's funny. Cico Vodcast
would always like post up their tents like in the hood,
like you fucking like Kmar or fucking like random parking
lots like in Lynnwood.

Speaker 1 (56:24):
Bro.

Speaker 2 (56:25):
Like it was Circus Vargas was like the ghetto Circus Vargas.
It was.

Speaker 1 (56:28):
It was ghetto.

Speaker 3 (56:29):
It was just a Mexican They can't they traveled from Mexico,
you know, so like yeah, they had like the scary
ass Mexican clowns.

Speaker 2 (56:36):
Bro.

Speaker 3 (56:36):
So for sure, these people can't get that, they can't
get through anymore with the whole fucking vistas and they're fucked, bro.

Speaker 2 (56:42):
But it was something. It turned into something else over
the last like twenty years. Yeah, I think that it
was like circus something.

Speaker 1 (56:48):
But it was like I can't remember the d of
all that ship, bro. They bargains is probably the only
circus deal with the elephants probably remember.

Speaker 2 (56:59):
I remember going to the circus in Mexico.

Speaker 3 (57:01):
They were crazy after Bro, I went to this one
circus and one famous actor from like back in the days.
His name is Cappoolina and he was very old as fuck,
so he must have been ninety something hosting the circus.
So this guy was a big fucking actor like in
the he was basically like almost kind of like what
what was he? Like? Uh, Jackson Jackie Leson for Mexico

(57:22):
and Black and White.

Speaker 2 (57:23):
He was like, oh, I know what you're talking about.

Speaker 3 (57:25):
So, like his parents were like from like Lebanon or
something like that, but he was born in Mexico. So
like he started hosting like all these people start hosting
circuses later.

Speaker 2 (57:32):
On in their lives, you know, and like I remember being.

Speaker 1 (57:34):
A kid, like in like ninety eight, How was that circus?

Speaker 2 (57:36):
It was, dude? It was badass, bro.

Speaker 3 (57:38):
It was fucking cool because I seen this old guy
in movies, you know, like black and white movies. Oh
that's cot Poolina, you know. But like he was ready
at towards end of his life. I think it was
were like ninety Like this was like ninety eight. That
must have been like nine or ten.

Speaker 1 (57:49):
That's funny because Pirito from Travel, the guy in the
circus name, he wrote all his movies. He wrote a
lot with movies, and he wrote in Michelle en go
check me out on Spotify a podcast in Spanish that
where I do the biography of Roberto. You did do that, Lavida.

Speaker 2 (58:15):
And the show's actually on right now. Hurt's really good.

Speaker 1 (58:19):
I haven't watched it, bro. Then get a phone call,
So drama.

Speaker 3 (58:22):
Bro, behind the scenes, people are sucking chill.

Speaker 1 (58:25):
What's up much? You're ready for a heart for Connecticut?

Speaker 2 (58:28):
Fuck? Yeah, we're gonna see you guys out there in
Connecticut this weekend. Yeah, we're going this weekend. I looked
at the weather. I'm very excited. That's not going to
be killing me.

Speaker 1 (58:38):
Dude.

Speaker 2 (58:38):
It was ninety degrees today and I don't have an
air conditioning in my car, and I had to make
a couple of deliveris. I had to deliver some ship
down the Long Beach and then stretch back up this way.
And I felt like I didn't stop sweating until I
got into this house. Like I felt like I've continuously
sweated all day today. It's so weird, too, bro, because
in ninety degree day in northern California, ain't like a

(59:03):
ninety degree I feel like the sun is extra mad
at me here it hurts. It is fucking sunny as fuck.
What you got there? My boy?

Speaker 1 (59:13):
A hundred and something over one hundred thousand subscribers on YouTube.
Hell yeah, look at that, bro.

Speaker 2 (59:19):
That's gorgeous people.

Speaker 3 (59:20):
Bro.

Speaker 2 (59:21):
What's funny is the other day I was with my
girlfriend's brother and his son, and his son was like,
what's up with your podcast? He's like ten, you know?
And I go, it's a good podcast, a history podcast.
He goes, how many followers and subscribers do I had
to show him, bro, and he was impressed. That's a
big deal.

Speaker 1 (59:39):
Look at that one hundred thousand subscriber people. Let's get
us Let's get to two hundred thousand. Man, go stop
being lazy, leave them comments, share this podcast. I know
you're commenting right now on the chat. How about transfer
two comments on the regular comments. Yes, please, let's get
this start they start engaging people.

Speaker 2 (01:00:00):
Yeah. That's the thing, man, is that you guys do
a good job of commenting. And I gotta say the
comments section in Felippe's page is great, but you guys
need to share more, like we need to boost this
channel way bigger. Man.

Speaker 1 (01:00:13):
Also, shut up to that, to that that couple those
people in the chat room that have been trying to
get together and go on a date, really, is that happening? Happening, bro,
it's a love connection. Yeah, that's so cool, dude, I
want to say a love connection. Man. There's two people
who who are gonna meet her to swap meet.

Speaker 2 (01:00:33):
Bro, Melissa. You know I've been seeing lately, and I
got to ask you guys, because like, it's a different
vibe down here in southern California. I've been watching a
lot of these Cholos and Cholas complain about people going
to the swap met dressed up alas.

Speaker 1 (01:00:51):
Like, bro, hey, I fought through this look dude, and.

Speaker 5 (01:00:56):
The like it is it me?

Speaker 2 (01:00:58):
Or is that a stupid thing to get angry? There's
the stupidest thing ever. It's so dumb, bro, people are
causplaying you. You've made it, you know what I mean?

Speaker 1 (01:01:07):
Like I shut people for this.

Speaker 2 (01:01:09):
Look. There's this old ass lady that's on there and
she's got the pendleton and the fucking sure the low
rider hat and she's like, people don't know what I've
been through, and she's all tied it up and fucked up,
and I'm like, maybe you're too old for this. Yeah, Like,

(01:01:29):
like I thought it was rather to dress like that
when I was a kid, brost of all nobody.

Speaker 1 (01:01:33):
If you dressed that hardcore in nineteen ninety, no questions asked,
You're gonna get shot up market street it jose, no
questions as no talking. You can't even say I'm going
to a swap meet. And also if you were if

(01:01:55):
you were to break dance and try to do something
like this and you made it like you're doing a
be you would have got jumped at Venice Beach by
the shoreline cribs damn dude. You know I know this
low rider look, it's a big style now in Japan
and it's like being goth. Yeah yeah yeah. And you
know people after the nineties they started to noticing, man

(01:02:19):
that the police are gonna pull me over, and they
replaced khakis with Dockers. Yeah yes, and low riders with
Honda Courts.

Speaker 2 (01:02:29):
So this is the thing.

Speaker 1 (01:02:31):
I'm watching this and she's angry.

Speaker 2 (01:02:34):
There's a fellow solo comic as well that feels this thing,
and I'm like, you don't gotta be mad, bro, like, like,
do you know what my favorite meme is? Our favorite?

Speaker 1 (01:02:44):
Like, you know, they get mad more when the Influenza
dressed look alo and makes it.

Speaker 2 (01:02:48):
Yes, they get mad at people at home.

Speaker 1 (01:02:51):
You were always a joke, Holmes.

Speaker 2 (01:02:52):
He dressed like the white which I thought Gabby was
next thing for the longest, brot because skaters dressed like that.

Speaker 1 (01:03:00):
Yeah, he blew up as a trollo.

Speaker 2 (01:03:04):
Bro.

Speaker 1 (01:03:04):
Besides, I gut from food gone wild wet talent.

Speaker 2 (01:03:07):
I'm trying to think, who's who's there? Uh Jesus Christ?
But he's walking yeah, oh do it.

Speaker 3 (01:03:15):
Fucking I mean not not the furiously, but he is
like you know what I mean, and the home Maide,
we do the show with Wood's got talent and Eric
and his buddy, they do the troll adventures.

Speaker 2 (01:03:25):
They got pressed by the fucking like these for this one.

Speaker 3 (01:03:29):
Podcast and they're like, oh dude, like you guys, why what,
We'll just send you the clip, bro. So like these
guys are kind of tripping, kind of like, oh man,
you guys are so This guy went on this podcast
saying how like so they had to show after us
at the lack Factory and they're like, man, I don't
appreciate these guys are trying to making fun of our culture,
you know, like you know the people you you you
the people you.

Speaker 2 (01:03:49):
Dress up ass on your videos. I'm one of the
real ones, Homie like trying to be all hard.

Speaker 1 (01:03:55):
Yeah, like what the doing get?

Speaker 2 (01:03:57):
You know what, you're forty you're forty five yers old.

Speaker 1 (01:04:00):
You gonna know what.

Speaker 2 (01:04:00):
Video made me very proud to be Mexican out of
all the videos I've ever seen, because they throw up
all kind of you know that ship makes me feel good.
But my favorite is when this guy's got a sombrero
and a serapis a white dude in a mustache and
he's going up to white people Asian college defending it
and they're like, yeah, man, that's and they're all getting

(01:04:21):
mad at him. And then he goes up to Mexican
people and they're all, fuck, no, that's fucking And I
love that we're not as easily offended by ship. And
then when I see some Chola on TV on like
Instagram being like fuck that I fought for this Pendleton,
it's like, fuck yourself.

Speaker 3 (01:04:37):
Penalton's were like all that okay, all that ship Pendletons.
You know who Warland fos, surfers, surfers, Native Americans surfers
to the beach boys weren't were the beach boys were
worrying Pendletons.

Speaker 1 (01:04:50):
So what so what everybody in California, we're working in
the farms, we're wearing a Pendleton.

Speaker 2 (01:04:56):
Oh that's right.

Speaker 1 (01:04:58):
We did wearing a home when their dad were not working.

Speaker 2 (01:05:02):
Did we do I don't remember, but we did something
around but Chucos and Chuco town and why they adopted
certain things, and one of them was that the kids
were wearing their parents' oversized clothes. Yeah, and that was
like the thing was like to them, they were wearing
their parents farmers clothes.

Speaker 1 (01:05:20):
And I don't know. And the Zutsu riots was because
there was a shortage of clothing, you know, in America,
because they needed to make uniforms to send Americans to
go dy in World War Two, so the leading uniforms,
so there was like a short of clothing. I don't know.
If you if you look at the votave in the
nineteen forties, a lot of white people are just wearing
khakis with a white T shirt only like this. But

(01:05:42):
if you if you look at black people and Mexicans
not us, we're in protest of that shit, and we're
wearing big zoot suits. So you could tell right away. Man,
the more clothes you were, the more hard you were,
right right.

Speaker 2 (01:05:56):
I knew. I knew Zuzus were pretty mainstream because I
used Tom and Jerry when he wore the suite. Yeah
it is you, well my grandfather, is it you? Or
is it you my baby? Bro?

Speaker 1 (01:06:10):
That is so good.

Speaker 2 (01:06:12):
Yeah, we don't even see that no more. That's just
eighty years old, but it's still good. It's still relevant.
When we were little kids, we were watching those cartoons
and digging.

Speaker 1 (01:06:19):
Up give them a shout out, bro. Oh yeah, a
more ghana go follow them on Instagram right now. I'm
more underscore Banghana right now. Man, go get the we
already murdered half of it.

Speaker 2 (01:06:34):
This is such a brilliant idea for a family. Her idea.

Speaker 1 (01:06:38):
It tastes like, okay, I'm gonna take a little piece.

Speaker 2 (01:06:40):
Oh my god, the masters.

Speaker 1 (01:06:41):
It tastes like pumpkin Man, and it has them.

Speaker 2 (01:06:45):
I feel there should be like a baby Jesus in there.
That's how.

Speaker 3 (01:06:49):
That's how like a kid it looks. So there's this
lady who do.

Speaker 1 (01:06:53):
They make sweet ones too? They should?

Speaker 2 (01:06:56):
You know what I look. I just was looking at
their Instagram right now.

Speaker 3 (01:06:59):
So there's a h this white teacher who's that kind
of going viral right now because she's a kindergarten teacher,
goes all ound to celebrate Mexican Independence Day with her students.

Speaker 1 (01:07:08):
She does get pregnant.

Speaker 2 (01:07:11):
That's how she looks like you see.

Speaker 3 (01:07:14):
But people a lot of comments are saying, punky, I
do That's awesome, and only like a couple of people
are mad about them, but the rest are all happy.

Speaker 2 (01:07:20):
What is she doing again, She's just celebrating Mexican Independence.
She's a white lady and she's.

Speaker 1 (01:07:24):
Dressed like she will come to my house and burn anytime.

Speaker 2 (01:07:27):
Let me see this. Go back to the first picture
her and my wife.

Speaker 1 (01:07:36):
Oh my god. Yeah, and she would go to my
house and burn in Totia anytime. Bro, Why are you
mad at her? And my wife gonna eat with her
all day long? Let me, you're invited to the garden
that side of the vegan style almost. I'm trying to well, Bro,
I have a I have a commentary right now about this.
I see a lot of comments.

Speaker 2 (01:07:56):
I'm gonna send it to homeboys.

Speaker 1 (01:07:57):
Send it. I see a lot of comments when when
white people are appropriating Latino stuff, or a black person
is singing, and somebody is doing something that makes us
look good. But it's always not us somebody because they're
too busy fighting somebody else. Because when we fuck up English,

(01:08:19):
nobody nobody praises us. A white guy starts sucking up English.
He invited to a carna sada? Why but you can't
even say carnasada? And then everybody does they see that,
They see like Marshall Lynch from The Raiders, he works
a sombrero. You're invited to a gardnasada anything? You know?
But I'm trying to think, Bro, how big is the carnal?

Speaker 2 (01:08:42):
Bro? When is it gonna happen?

Speaker 1 (01:08:45):
When is it gonna happen? And and it seems like
there's gonna be more people there who are not Mexican
at the car now.

Speaker 2 (01:08:52):
Right right, I get invited. Sometimes in my mind, I'm like,
I don't know how you cook that ship, you know,
like because I cook it a certain way, and like you.

Speaker 1 (01:09:01):
Pee on it? Right? No with beer? No me, Bro.
I used to get the garda sala already prepared from
the butcher, the kind of said, and it came in
a bag, broke a bag and then like it had onions,
cilantro and oranges on it, and then at the bottom

(01:09:22):
it had a piece of wax and then another car
that so and then when I get it home, we
will put it in and codna beer with Levin and Bro.
By the time we put that meat on the grill,
it's already cooked with a beer.

Speaker 2 (01:09:36):
Yeah. Yeah, that's the thing is I never cooked with beer.
Really start fighting because the beer alcohol delete depletes the
meat of its water because alcohol dehydrate, dehydrates. I learned
that I watched someone who was cooking with beer, and
my cousin's barbecue guy, you know, and he goes, yea's

(01:09:59):
not a good idea. And then after that it kind
of fucked with me. Whenever I see someone cooking with beer.
That's what I mean is like, how are you cooking that?
When someone's like come over to my house, I'm like,
I don't know, man, I'm picky dude, And plus I
don't know how you cook that ship. The other thing is,
bro is there's a lot of food. What is it
called illness? Like pathogens and ship It sounds scary.

Speaker 1 (01:10:21):
Passagen pastagens get sick. So we want some full podcast.

Speaker 3 (01:10:27):
Okay, So like like the Mexicans in might you to
cut Asdad?

Speaker 2 (01:10:30):
What about white people? They vite you to Castro? I
don't go to nobody's ship, dude. Apparently I'll go to
my girl's house and that's about it.

Speaker 1 (01:10:37):
To a barbecue once, I won't get into it, manuset.
They invited me to the barbecue when three times in
a row, man, and they never made carnala. They only
made the hamburgers.

Speaker 2 (01:10:50):
That's good, but it's not You're missing.

Speaker 1 (01:10:54):
What's some full public reminder here? Man? That when when
that crazy event happened in Utah. Line Man, the governor
of Utah, said that he was praying and praying that
the shooter was not white, or was not from his
from or he was hoping that he'll be from another state.

(01:11:17):
And you know what, man, way, I'm not even gonna lie.
I was praying too, and so are a lot of
Mexicans praying, and we're we're saying, please don't be Mexican. Bro,
please don't even be there. Something hot dogs, don't even
show one, bro, and food chairs at that place. Don't

(01:11:37):
even be there, don't even be there. He praying, don't
let it be Mexican, don't let it be Latino. Nothing.
And you know what, my my prayer were answered because
I was specific with my prayer. I said, don't let
it be Latino. That fucking government from Utah was asking
for too much. He wanted that foot to be white.
He didn't want that foot to be Republican. He wanted

(01:11:58):
to get be another state. When you're praying to God,
you're gonna be specific.

Speaker 2 (01:12:02):
Man, confusing Jesus, confusing Jesus. Please don't.

Speaker 1 (01:12:08):
Yeah, I would, I would say, bro, please don't be
a pison. Please slipped in a tree and then jumped
on the roof when I saw it.

Speaker 2 (01:12:17):
When I saw because it was in the middle of
the day, bro, yeah, he's at work right now. Dog.

Speaker 1 (01:12:23):
When I saw what happened, I was like, please don't
let it be a pison, man, don't let it be
a from Venezuela.

Speaker 2 (01:12:32):
Because because no matter what you know, they are, they're gonna.

Speaker 1 (01:12:35):
And also I was saying, please don't let it be
a Mexican with joker here.

Speaker 2 (01:12:44):
A joker.

Speaker 1 (01:12:47):
And it wasn't, man, dude, it was a morning guy.

Speaker 2 (01:12:51):
That's crazy, dude. But I think I'm talking about that prayer. Bro,
I don't know what you guys. It's just how you're
very specific.

Speaker 1 (01:13:00):
And it's because my prayer. So let it be a Pisa.
And God knows when I say Pisa, it includes all
Elligo immigrants, included me.

Speaker 2 (01:13:08):
Yeah, because the guy was asking you. You gotta be
confusing God like that.

Speaker 1 (01:13:13):
Bro, you gotta.

Speaker 2 (01:13:16):
That's crazy. This Tomali's are fucking bomb, by the way
they are, Bro, Dude, what the they said?

Speaker 6 (01:13:24):
Uh?

Speaker 2 (01:13:25):
Man?

Speaker 1 (01:13:25):
Like, what fruit was in that fucking jackfruit?

Speaker 2 (01:13:30):
They used that as to me, and it is so tasty.
It tastes so it tastes better than are.

Speaker 3 (01:13:42):
Okay, what about the fucking is that their hot sauce?
Because that's fucking good.

Speaker 1 (01:13:46):
The sauce is bomb, Bro, that hot sauce. What tastes
good with potato tacos?

Speaker 2 (01:13:52):
Oh my god?

Speaker 1 (01:13:53):
And three eggs over easy on top of the right hair.
You never had age with Tomali?

Speaker 6 (01:13:59):
No, I never had cocormination. Not stop jack fruit on
the red. Then it's just the color of Okay.

Speaker 2 (01:14:13):
Are you guys heard it first? Are here? No pumpkin?

Speaker 1 (01:14:16):
But it's good.

Speaker 2 (01:14:17):
It's Jack Ford. I think.

Speaker 1 (01:14:20):
We're giving we have a new engineer. Guy. That's the
information he gave us.

Speaker 2 (01:14:22):
Man, you got blaming is that we just got school.

Speaker 1 (01:14:28):
It's not punking man, it's just you're just toys.

Speaker 2 (01:14:32):
Yeah, Bro, we'll stop spreading that fucking lies. Bro, But
this is good, like you really say that.

Speaker 1 (01:14:40):
Okay, But the way you yelled remind me of the
way Paul yelled at made my movie because my brother
came out of the closet in my movie, I'm not
lighting them, bore. And then and then, uh, I think
you're the I think of the closet. Everybody said fuck
you to here. Everybody left the room and it was

(01:15:02):
just Paul drin be by myself. He goes, Man, this
fucking family sucks and Paul, you're fucking bug you keeping
your brother's only men.

Speaker 2 (01:15:17):
That's fucking funny.

Speaker 1 (01:15:22):
Get my joke. He's having a heart attack with my
brother looking for the closet and I get behinde him
like this, you know you too coming on that the movie.
And then the grandma that the graandma in the movie says,
how come you just don't women in the.

Speaker 2 (01:15:44):
I did wander that myself for a long time.

Speaker 3 (01:15:46):
I haven't seen that movie when I when You Guys
premiered like years ago at that one movie theater.

Speaker 1 (01:15:52):
And the Tommies you were there, think you were coming
in a long time.

Speaker 2 (01:15:58):
I drove all the way out with some homies.

Speaker 1 (01:15:59):
To go it was good, bro, And you meet up
with that girl for yeah, Bro?

Speaker 2 (01:16:04):
Was that weird? Like somebody that's not your girlfriend? Right?
Because you were you in a relationship with I'm an actor, bro,
act Bro was it weird though? Because like it wasn't
your girlfriend?

Speaker 1 (01:16:16):
So it was kind of like you know what, Bro,
I I had no I only did it for the scene,
but somehow didn't have no feeling afterwards. It felt like
that kids felt like my first kids I had. When
I met this girl one time, bro one time I was,
it felt like when I was making, like when I
first made I was somebody when I was like twelve

(01:16:36):
or thirteen years old or fourteen, beau Bro I was.
I was not. I was sick and I couldn't go
to school. And then I was walking back to my
house and this little girl my age, she fucking pointed out,
she waved at me, and she was not home. She
told me that she was sick too, so she fucking
she invitebated her house and we just started making out,

(01:16:58):
eating cereal carve or something. But I remember she bullied
her nose and I didn't care, right.

Speaker 2 (01:17:05):
Yeah, So it felt like that. It was like it
meant nothing, nothing.

Speaker 3 (01:17:09):
But but if it was like a bysop from like
fucking from like a nightclub in Monto Bello, they'd be
a horny after, right, Like yeah, but in a scene.

Speaker 1 (01:17:18):
We didn't even practice. We didn't practice the sexual scene.
It was natural. And then then the kids was just
a kiss.

Speaker 2 (01:17:28):
Did they give you an option to practice?

Speaker 1 (01:17:31):
They they told her what does she want to wear?
What did she want to get touched? Told thought what
work told me to do so totally before I'm gonna
grab you like this, you know, and then then she's
gonna grind.

Speaker 2 (01:17:46):
Good lord, Bro, Yeah, I wonder too, because I've never
been cast for anything yet that involved I did.

Speaker 1 (01:17:53):
I did.

Speaker 3 (01:17:54):
I did a kissing scene you were with ste but
they're felt comfortable before.

Speaker 1 (01:17:59):
I didn't felt comfortable, but I felt the uncomfortable as
because and in some other movie I did with Thompson
Girl and and Jimmy O Yang, you're you're the taxi
driver was a taxi driver, but the scene there was
Tomson girls emy O Yang. She hooked up with a
girl who lives in a trailer somewhere by Lancaster. So

(01:18:21):
he went to go see if she had or know
his notebook. But her husband shows up like some sheriff
and it's fucking Toms. The girl and the girl had
to simulate a blowjob, bro right there, even though she
was not giving one. She has to pretend she was
giving one. But but they're all we're all men watching this,

(01:18:42):
maybe like little one female grip girl, you know, But
I still I can just imagine how uncomfortable it is
for this actress to even pretend to give a blowjob,
pretend because because Tom's the girl going like this grabbing
her headdog and like put they put it, moved her
head and then ejaguladies he shoots up the.

Speaker 2 (01:19:09):
That's crazy I have because like, uh, you are a fluff.

Speaker 1 (01:19:13):
For right in a movie. Yeah, yes, Buccaneers.

Speaker 2 (01:19:18):
I was a guard Scagnetti's Pirates Scagnetti's Revenge, and I
was background. I was just background actor in that like
a like like it was a porn that made it
all the way to blockbuster there Pirates one and Pirates
two Scagnettes and it was a full length feature porn
movie and you could watch the hardcore on like you know,

(01:19:42):
porn channels. Then they had the softcore and then no
sex at all a blockbuster. Yeah, and uh yeah, I
was very short in the scene. I was supposed to
be longer, but I didn't like the way, uh that
I was getting it because porn people are not as

(01:20:02):
nice as fucking Hollywood people, and Hollywood people are nice,
but they're pretty shitty to me. So I kind of
just fucking like bounced dude, you know. And uh, and
I made good money off of it. It was during
the rider's strike. But you didn't get to like, you
weren't get to see the sex scenes or anything. You
didn't get to see the only thing that was cool

(01:20:23):
was like, uh, Jesse Jane was in it, and we're
all in the same dressing room, like because that was
a principal role. I saw her getting naked and then
they had like some lady was like greasing her up
for her sex scene. Yeah. I was watching that, like
they were not getting ocean on her and stuff. She

(01:20:43):
was amazing shape, dude, And we had talked when I
was doing the audition, so she knew me. So she's
talking to me and this lady's like rubbing her, rubbing
her up and down with like lotion, and I'm just like, dude,
I'm in fucking pirate pants talk, you know, And I'm
like trying to like I'm like in my mind and
I'm like, don't get a boner right now, don't get

(01:21:04):
but I can't remember. The guy's name is long hair.
His name was Devin something, and he's a famous porn actor.
He's old now, but he was a total dick to me. Dude. Yeah,
he was a real dick. So I was like, you
know how these he would get mad because I had
my shoes that they gave me were too tight, and

(01:21:24):
so I would change in and out of the shoes
during takes, and so I kind of was like trying
to limp and put the thing in. He goes, take
your time. Why now you were only shooting And this
was when they were shooting in Blu Ray and he
was shooting in Blu Ray and ten ADP And he's all,
We're always shooting in two of the most expensive sources
of film, so go ahead and take your time. And

(01:21:46):
I was just like, you know what, fuck this guy, bro,
fuck this guy and fuck these people.

Speaker 1 (01:21:50):
Dude, like.

Speaker 2 (01:21:52):
He has a huge call. I was applying their walking
on though. Uh, I'll send you the pictures so you
can put it in post. But I have a picture
with Jesse Jane. But it was all right, dude, would
I'm more worried about I want to go back to
the kissing stuff. Dude, have you done it with a girlfriend?

(01:22:17):
Like well someone?

Speaker 3 (01:22:18):
Because so so it was it was an Apple commercial
and uh, while supposed to be I came on the commercial.

Speaker 2 (01:22:23):
I was supposed to be like a I mean this
this comedian.

Speaker 3 (01:22:26):
Uh we're roommates at the time, and I went, they
needed somebody for to be my my girlfriend.

Speaker 2 (01:22:32):
At the time in the commercial.

Speaker 3 (01:22:33):
So we had to audition kissing each other.

Speaker 2 (01:22:36):
Oh ship, okay, and we and.

Speaker 3 (01:22:37):
We got it and then we went we got called
back and then we we're literally making out for like
an hour straight after that.

Speaker 2 (01:22:45):
Yeah, in the commercial, were you feeling it? It was
like it was like, there's nothing because because we are
feeling it.

Speaker 3 (01:22:52):
No, because because we lived together at the roommates.

Speaker 2 (01:22:55):
So he went back home and nothing. Nothing.

Speaker 1 (01:22:58):
He didn't feel weird afterwards. No, it was.

Speaker 2 (01:23:02):
Just professional. She's a lesbian too. Okay, never mind, I
have a girlfriends the comedian. Oh yeah, okay, that's such
a horrible thing for me to say about somebody. I'm sorry.
I did not know that I knew that person that
we were talking about. I got offered, like I you know,
you you go on Central Casting or on what is

(01:23:25):
it called networks? Yeah, and you just I apply for
everything that is in the area, and sometimes I don't
look at the pay because it looks dope, or I
just maybe I ignored the pay. But I got offered
a role where I was making out with someone and
I was tripping, dude, I was like, I gotta tell

(01:23:46):
my girl. How am I going to break this to
my girl? Like, I don't know how We've never even
had this conversation if like this pops up. So I
was freaked out right. And a girl doesn't get jealous.
She's not a jealous person. But I just would wonder,
you know, what she would think. And I did, on
accident when we were just dating, tell her I was
like a serial cheater in my past relationship, so I

(01:24:08):
would have to have this whole fucking conversation. And I
looked at the fucking call sheet or like the thing
they send you, and it said no fucking money in it.
So I was all, what, oh, I think it was
like a college film. It was a usc film. I
was all right, cool, I'm nothing. You don't have to
I'm not gonna I'm not gonna buy that stress for

(01:24:29):
no money.

Speaker 3 (01:24:29):
Dog, here's the commercial trying to play it bro here,
I'll say, I'll say, I'll send it.

Speaker 2 (01:24:37):
Oh yeah, dude, let's watch Rizzo make out with a chick. Dude,
I do have a video I did because I did
sex sent me to the ar. I did an episode
of that. What I was supposed to do something for them.
If you look up burnt toe, sex sent me to
the R, that's me. I burned my toe on the

(01:24:58):
beach one time making out with the girl I was.
I was going down on her and the fire was
behind us. Dug my feet into the into the fire,
and it burned my I had to go home. It
was a TV shows, it was.

Speaker 3 (01:25:13):
It was almost kind of like that was a waste
to die. But like ways, new people got hurt having suck.

Speaker 2 (01:25:18):
It was called sex sent me to the ear if
you look up burnt tow. But uh, they augmented it
a little bit. They said, like I had, I went
to my buddy's house. I went to my roommate. My
dad actually had to get a e R. I didn't
get a ride for my dad to hear the e R.

Speaker 1 (01:25:34):
It really happened for the movie, for the show. Already
for the show, I did it.

Speaker 2 (01:25:38):
With my girlfriend at the time, and they used a
girl that looked like her, another fat chick and fucking
and they switched that around. But it was my homegirl
Dora that shout out to Dora, Dora Garabay, best night
on the beach. Ever, I mean, you didn't want me

(01:25:59):
to tell me guess what the podcast. People get personal
on the podcast.

Speaker 1 (01:26:04):
What's up? Break shows coming up? Or what?

Speaker 2 (01:26:06):
Yes?

Speaker 3 (01:26:08):
I have our shows coming up this uh fucking oh yeah,
this Sunday, I'm gonna be at the Tempe.

Speaker 1 (01:26:16):
Improv at the Stand Up Live, and then I'm.

Speaker 2 (01:26:20):
Gonna be also San Jose next week on Thursday with.

Speaker 3 (01:26:24):
Food's Got Town and I'm hell on Nam actually my
own show October seventeen in Austin, Texas, nngratch.

Speaker 2 (01:26:33):
Then we're going to fucking Boston. Bro Hey dude, okay,
I'm excited for that.

Speaker 1 (01:26:39):
What's the day for Boston?

Speaker 2 (01:26:40):
Boston? What the October twenty third, twenty four, and twenty fifth.

Speaker 1 (01:26:47):
Also October fourth, I'm gonna be at the Thunderbelly Casino
with Frankie Jay Valentino on the show too.

Speaker 2 (01:26:58):
Oh yeah, you gotta do.

Speaker 1 (01:27:03):
What're the ladies whana?

Speaker 2 (01:27:05):
We're coming back to do a show soon with.

Speaker 1 (01:27:07):
A dental appointments. Did anybody pull and you pull up
the video of I Burnt my toe?

Speaker 6 (01:27:14):
No?

Speaker 2 (01:27:15):
Put up? Okay google that because it's because they have
a person is playing the real yes, yes, an actor
like wa wait wait yes, so somebody plays you, something
plays me, and someone plays my girlfriend at the time. Yeah,

(01:27:36):
sex seventy the ear burnt toe, Well I do that.
Let me play my ship. I'm gonna be I'm gonna
be a pleasanton at the Neighborhood Bar on nine twenty four.

Speaker 1 (01:27:46):
Yeah, and then.

Speaker 2 (01:27:50):
Uh wait, wait, wait a minute, I'll be at the
park Side Bar and Grill and Davis on the twenty seventh.
I'll be headlining both those shows. Come fucking catch me.
I mean the a I'm in the Bay and if
you got shows in the Bay and you want me
to be on your show between uh sorry, I gotta
do this between fuck dude, anyway, hit me up. I'll

(01:28:16):
be there that week, so uh and of end of
end of uh September, you guys got to show you
want me and put me on and then yeah, dude, yeah, okay.
So I mean, just to preface this, this is a
girl from high school that I had been crushing on forever.
She started to go through a divorce, asked me to
take her out for the day. We drank forties. We

(01:28:36):
were trying to get down on the beach together, and
I ended up having to fucking go to the e
R that night. You might want to skip to like talk.

(01:29:10):
At that point, It's like, dude, I know that I
have sustained a serious injury, but I don't want to
tell Jenna about it.

Speaker 4 (01:29:17):
I had no clue that he was in pain or
that anything was wrong.

Speaker 2 (01:29:23):
I'm sorry, you got to go. What do you mean?

Speaker 3 (01:29:27):
I just thought.

Speaker 2 (01:29:30):
He's in a hurry to get away from me. Everything
was happening crazily, and so I didn't tell her because
all I could think about.

Speaker 1 (01:29:38):
Was was my own pain.

Speaker 2 (01:29:40):
I could. So I wake up my friend and I'm like, dude,
I'm in a lot of pain right now that's supposed
to be And I looked down and it looks like hamburger.

Speaker 1 (01:29:53):
Oh my god, it's touching.

Speaker 2 (01:29:59):
The doctor comes in and he's like, oh, we got
a burn toe here. You know, I got a couple
of burned toes. You have third degree burns and surgery
if we have any chance of saving defunction. Yeah. They
had to split my toe out. They had to like
cut into it because it was melted together. But why

(01:30:19):
didn't know?

Speaker 3 (01:30:19):
I know?

Speaker 2 (01:30:20):
How do I just found out about this right now?
I wrote that story and submitted it and made the
money off of it. I've been you're homeing for like
fifteen years. Bro, that's I don't sorry, no, I never,
I totally, I totally let that slip my mind.

Speaker 1 (01:30:32):
Until like lately, you know, like alien bro without gold tee.

Speaker 3 (01:30:38):
You know, it's like it's funny because like you look,
I don't know which almost healthier you now are that
it's all like in the middle, you know, like, oh yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:30:45):
I'm waiting healthier now. Yeah, because you know, walking and
stuff does that. I was a big fat butterball. That
chick was a feeder back then. Dude, she was a
feeder and I didn't realize this, but she was really
just trying to make me fat so nobody else would
fuck me. But I was fucking everybody. Oh boy, Yeah,
I didn't love that bitch. That's been a long time

(01:31:06):
with her. It was just comfortable. We bought a house together.

Speaker 1 (01:31:09):
She ended up else that played you. Huh.

Speaker 2 (01:31:14):
Yeah, she ended up like I like this much better.
I like this much better. I left and came home
and she was with the chef.

Speaker 1 (01:31:26):
Chef boy d.

Speaker 2 (01:31:28):
Yeah that's that, bro. I think I got mad at me.
I told him, I'm all, hey, bro, you're the guy
that plays me in And we were talking for a
minute and then I said, now I know who's gonna
play me. This is when I realized actors have huge
egos because I was on now I Know Who's gonna
play me? And it made for TV movie one day
and he disconnected from me on the spot. I'm Kramer.

(01:31:53):
I know how to play Cramer. I'm gonna play Cramer
like I'm gonna play Cramer. I don't play.

Speaker 1 (01:31:57):
But that a motivated don't forget more with Gona Jessica Albarez,
owner private Chef seventy one four six four four one
six seven five. Where's the kissing booth? Bro?

Speaker 2 (01:32:12):
You're kissing Phoenix, Arizona guys kissing video? Oh yeah, kissing video.

Speaker 1 (01:32:18):
Right here.

Speaker 2 (01:32:18):
Bro.

Speaker 3 (01:32:19):
So the guy that the guy that directed the video
is the guy from the Lonely Island, the small guy.

Speaker 2 (01:32:26):
Oh yeah, I forgot. The guy's name is litt Jewish
guys from the Lonely Island he directed. Yeah, it's funny
because like when we saman it was like a couple
of minutes.

Speaker 3 (01:32:35):
And after that he asked me, Christine, are you guys
really a couple of Like yeah, you guess you guys already.

Speaker 2 (01:32:41):
Got the job. You guys don't have to lie it.
You don't have to lie to them. I'm like, alright,
but I pad.

Speaker 7 (01:32:47):
Can hold your textbooks and notes so you can study
just about anywhere, so like not here, Yes, I'm not there.

Speaker 2 (01:32:57):
Oh my god, you practicing just for that.

Speaker 7 (01:33:03):
I can't get any work done.

Speaker 1 (01:33:04):
In my dorm room.

Speaker 7 (01:33:05):
Well get out of there, you know. And I had
prock and hold your textbooks and notes so you can
study just about him anywhere here.

Speaker 2 (01:33:14):
Yeah, well that one pay like ten thousand dollars that commercial.

Speaker 1 (01:33:20):
Fuck it. I didn't make out with nobody, bro, but
I sold a lot of world dress. Philippe's parts of
A T and T.

Speaker 2 (01:33:26):
Oh, I love that one. What's the one where you.

Speaker 1 (01:33:28):
Looked it up? Philippe's part of the A T and T?
The one about the second one? The second one.

Speaker 2 (01:33:36):
I'm striking out on my own mobile contract.

Speaker 1 (01:33:41):
Go miha. You will only have a place in our
share maybe here to help find you the right plan.
Oh bro, you know what was funny. I had a
stand in and the stand in was his big eggs
UFC fighter really and then he he he had to
wear that Alfred just for the bro, for the for

(01:34:01):
the lighting and all that. But he never really acted.
He just wore it.

Speaker 2 (01:34:05):
He just wore it so that they can set up
the shots.

Speaker 1 (01:34:08):
Yeah, play the one with me playing the Big Boss
Prism is great, but the videos in your cloud?

Speaker 2 (01:34:20):
What's going on here?

Speaker 1 (01:34:21):
To help activate new phones with all your old stuff cloudy.
I took a picture on top of a green screen
and they added a tiger.

Speaker 2 (01:34:31):
Oh that's so good, bro, that is so fucking good.

Speaker 1 (01:34:34):
Audition for that, and I got it, Bro. That year
I got two commercials I was supposed to play. Also
auditioned to be Yeah. Bro, oh yeah, look like audition, bro, audition,
I said, And then they used then auditioned for almost

(01:34:59):
got the Popeye Cajun Chicken Man.

Speaker 3 (01:35:02):
Bro.

Speaker 2 (01:35:02):
Oh really yeah, I've been so sick, dude.

Speaker 1 (01:35:05):
But they wanted to pay one standard paybro, and not
pay extra when it airs.

Speaker 2 (01:35:10):
Oh yeah, fuck off me.

Speaker 1 (01:35:11):
That's how it is now. I did a very very
non union bro. You know, come on, Popy, you cheat motherfucker. Yeah,
you all my money. You made little cheap ass sandwiches.

Speaker 2 (01:35:20):
Oh they're a fucking national chain. I got. I got
resids from when I did that Slimjim commercial back in
the day.

Speaker 1 (01:35:29):
I got you stepped up Bro.

Speaker 2 (01:35:30):
I remember thinking that it was only the money that
they gave me, and then went like and I was
waiting for the check and I got like a twenty
four thousand dollars check. No, it was twelve. I made
twenty four thousand off of it. And it was twelve
when I called the lady because I was worried. Bro,
I'd never seen money like that in my life. Oh,
Bobby needed shoes. I'm not even fucking lying. Dog called
up and was like, Hey, I think you guys made

(01:35:51):
a mistake, and she goes, how much did we send you?
I said twelve thousands. She goes, oh, because you're only
getting half, we'll send you the other half. Later, I
was all, oh, oh my god, I'm getting hookers this week.

Speaker 1 (01:36:05):
What's up fool? Speaking of hooker, don't forget to get
to Tomali's Yeah Dude underscore Ghana. What's Up? Full podcast? Matt,
Thank you for listening. I'll see you guys this week
at Harper Connecticut. Don't forget to go listen to the
History for Fools podcast. We went off to the deep end,

(01:36:25):
but you're gonna like the podcast. Also, do you even
binge podcast? I don't know the subject. But we had
a great podcast this week on aliens movies will show
up next time, So man, I love doing that podcast too,
And thank you for listening. And those people that walked
up to me in Vegas and said history for fools.

(01:36:46):
I never thought you young ladies listen to that.

Speaker 2 (01:36:49):
Thank you guys for listening. Dude, I appreciate you guys.

Speaker 1 (01:36:51):
And that hold me there say he loved even binge.

Speaker 3 (01:36:55):
A big shout out to uh uh, thank you even
though music Hall in Chicago. Thanks to Ivan, the manager
at the venue for letting me stay at the condo.

Speaker 2 (01:37:05):
Upstairs for hell yeah week. You're awesome Ivan, and do
you guys you're dude.

Speaker 3 (01:37:10):
That's that's such a badass menu the even though music
Hall and Chicago, it's bad as it's gorgeous.

Speaker 2 (01:37:17):
Book me next, bro, I just want to stay in
your place.

Speaker 1 (01:37:21):
Hell yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:37:23):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:37:24):
Man, all my data at philippeworld dot com.

Speaker 3 (01:37:29):
Yeah, don't try, don't talk.