December 13, 2025 • 40 mins
What are the essential life skills our kids truly need to know before they head out into the real world?
How often to wash their sheets, how to cook a basic meal, managing bills and payments, doing laundry without turning their white shirts pink - these are things that most of us learnt well before we moved out, but they don't seem to be as common today.
Only 21% of parents of children aged 5-17 years say their kids are often involved with cooking. That's 79% of kids that will likely leave home not knowing how to cook much more than a toasted cheese.
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Speaker 1 (00:05):
You're listening to the Weekend Collective podcast from News Talk SEDB.
Speaker 2 (00:45):
Yes's welcome back to the Weekend Collective. A little bit
of band aid there, I think, gosh, I wonder how
old that song is actually? Do they know that it's Christmas?
It's I don't want to say, I don't know. I
suspect it's more likely to be closer to something like
thirty years old than twenty years old, but who knows.
But anyway, welcome back to the show. But don't forget
if you've missed any of the previous hours, you can go.
(01:07):
After six o'clock, you can go and check out the
podcast and the hours will be up there. We get
them up pretty quickly once the show has concluded. But
right now we want your calls on eight hundred and
eighty ten eighty. And what we're going to discuss this
afternoon is, you know, it's the end of the year.
You know your kids might have finished exams waiting for results,
(01:29):
and anyway they're going to be heading out into the
real world. They might be going out to rent, they
might be heading down to university, they might be heading anywhere,
but they might be hitting out your front door. And
what are the essential life skills that our children, our
kids really need to know before they head out of
the head away from home. Seventy seven percent of parents
(01:51):
say it's vital to learn to cook, Yet sixty percent
believe today's children are less likely to pick up cooking
skills than when they grew up. But anyway, the ability
to cook is one thing only. There's also the question, Oh,
my goodness, this cuts close to here, and I've got
a very I've got a very questionable story to share
with you of my own, which involves quite a significant confession.
(02:13):
But anyway, how often to wash their sheets? It's related
to that, how to cook a basic meal, managing bills, payments,
doing the laundry without turning your white shirts pink. I
guess that's because you wash them with something that's red.
Probably that's how it works. Yes, it is a blue
based read, of course. Anyway, what do you learn? What
(02:33):
did you learn? And what what would you want your
children to be competent with by the time they leave home.
Only twenty one percent of parents of children age five
to seventeen say their kids are often involved with cooking.
So that's seventy nine percent who might leave home without
knowing how to much cook much more than toasted cheese.
So yeah, what are the most important skills children need
(02:55):
to know? What did you know? What were you taught
before you left home? And what did you wish you
were taught? We want your calls on eight hundred and
eighty ten eighty text too and to discuss this. She
is a clinical psychologist and her name is Jackie mcguah. Actually,
jack it's been a while since we had you on
the show.
Speaker 3 (03:14):
Hello, Hello, And like before we talk about the topic
at hand.
Speaker 4 (03:18):
That is my favorite Christmas song? Do they know? It's
Christmas time? And it came out in nineteen eighty four,
it's forty two years old.
Speaker 2 (03:24):
Oh my goodness.
Speaker 4 (03:27):
That you chose my favorite, so good picking you.
Speaker 2 (03:29):
Must have not even been born then.
Speaker 3 (03:32):
I'm not going to disclose my age, but that could
be a good assumption.
Speaker 2 (03:38):
Wow, because I am old enough to actually remember when
it came out.
Speaker 4 (03:43):
And they did a remake. Oh, okay, twenty seventeen or something.
Speaker 2 (03:47):
Maybe actually I do remember something like that. In fact,
I don't know if the remake was particularly any good.
Speaker 4 (03:52):
Was it was? It was okay? But the original is
definitely Oh you.
Speaker 2 (03:57):
Know what, I'm remembering that it's reminding me of the
Love Actually movie where he the guy is making a
Christmas song.
Speaker 4 (04:05):
And I can't vision of lover us all around lovers.
Speaker 2 (04:08):
Yeah, that's right, And I keep telling myself I'm not
going to watch that film again because I've seen Love
Actually a zillion times.
Speaker 4 (04:18):
But you can go and see it with a live
orchestra this year. That would be quite magical.
Speaker 2 (04:23):
That probably would be quite nice, wouldn't it. I do
have a funny story to tell about that. I am
apparently one of the teachers at a particular school that
I won't necessarily name. I thought it might be fun
for the kids who are twelve years old to watch
the movie and had forgotten that there is some slightly
gratuitous nudity. Y she said, to be like, oh my goodness,
(04:48):
to fast forward because it is a sort of wholesome
memory of the movie is wholesome, but it's got some
strange bit some nudity it does.
Speaker 3 (04:57):
Anyway, Anyway, you didn't bring the clem psicon to talk
about music, did you.
Speaker 2 (05:01):
Uh? Well, no, although you know it's Christmas music. Hey,
now do you remember what skills you look? I'm going
to be I'm guessing most girls women leave home with
better skills than guys, and I'm just being take my guess.
Speaker 3 (05:19):
I didn't know how to cook very well. I probably
still don't. Like I'm not not the primary ship in
our house. I can bait, but no, I wasn't a
great cook.
Speaker 4 (05:31):
But I did do things.
Speaker 3 (05:33):
Like I know how to do the laundry. I knew
how to keep my room tidy like I knew. I
knew that you always wash wash your sheets in your
towers once a week. It was the rule growing up
in our half. You know, I would have known how
to put a growthery list together. I think I budgeted
very well from a.
Speaker 4 (05:50):
Young age, so I had I had a good.
Speaker 3 (05:52):
Level of life skills. I left home at seventeen and
went into a hostel. You know, you had to grow
up real fast when you leave home young.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
Actually, in a hostel, they changed. Do you have to
wash your own sheets in a hospital or they drop
your linen?
Speaker 3 (06:05):
Do know you had a combined you know, shared laundry
down the bottom of the building, so the frequency of
sheet washing would have vary greatly in there.
Speaker 2 (06:14):
I yeah, I reckon what do you this is? I'm
not sure whether to share my confession. Quite yet, it's
too a conversation. How frequent, No, well, generally quite frequently,
although on this show or in talk back, I think
there was there was a survey done about half people
wash their sheets, and I think the national averages once
every two weeks. Does that surprise you?
Speaker 4 (06:38):
That's better than I thought.
Speaker 2 (06:40):
Okay, I will confess by the way that the ten
life skills, there's been a report done, actually was done.
Speaker 4 (06:47):
It was written by me.
Speaker 3 (06:49):
It's not and you can't clasify the ten life skills
of the report, but the research wasn't done by me.
The life skills were what I thought would be good
life skills for young people to have when they flew
the coop.
Speaker 2 (07:03):
I was interested to the first one sets the bar
quite high because I think there are people who probably
hit their forties and fifties, they still don't know yourself
and what matters to you.
Speaker 3 (07:14):
I know, see that Goods the psychologist put that one
up the top, doesn't she.
Speaker 4 (07:18):
You know, it's funny.
Speaker 3 (07:19):
Growing up, my favorite movie was notting Hill, which has
got a similar feel to Love It actually doesn't it.
And there's a scene in there when Julia Roberts is
talking about you know, she's probably in her forties or
maybe she's in her firties, and she said she doesn't
know how she likes her eggs, because every partner she's
been with, she just merges into their into their desires
and likes and identity. So does she likes fried eggs
(07:42):
or post eggs or scrambled eggs? And you know, she
was singled for the first time in her life, and
that was her kind of, you know, way of saying,
I have no idea who I am unless I'm attached
to somebody else. And so I think if we can
raise children that have some sense of what's important, you know,
like if you go from a moral perspective, what is
meaningful to me? What matters? Where are my lines things
(08:05):
that are important? If we can get young people to
have some sense of the fundamentals, I think that's really
important because yes, young children will you know, adolescents, young adults.
I'll go and have fun and they might do some
things that aren't great decisions. But if their fundamentals are
there about who they are as a p in person,
I think it will peat them within a good bandwidth.
Speaker 2 (08:25):
I actually reckon that this generation of young people are
more likely to be on top of it than previous generations,
including my own. I just have the sense that my daughters.
Maybe it's because I've got daughters, and I don't know
whether they're whether girls grow up a bit quicker or whatever,
but I have a sense that they are going to
(08:45):
know who they are, they do know who they are,
or they're learning that they're twelve and fourteen, thirteen and fourteen,
Whereas I don't think I had a clue. I knew
I liked sport and stuff, but I didn't really know
the big questions about what I wanted to do with
I didn't even know what I wanted to do when
I went to university.
Speaker 3 (09:00):
Even though I'm stuck with my response to that term,
because I think, on one hand, yes, I think younger
generations do have better self awareness. They're taught about, you know,
how to identify feelings and regulate and do like we
weren't talk that at school, but they do that now.
You know, Like my young children come home from school
and they talk about being in the red zone or
staffish breathing to.
Speaker 4 (09:19):
Calm down, and you know, so obviously they're having those
conversations at school but on the other hand, in a
world of social media, do they know who they are
or do they know what they want to present to
the world, And those two things are quite different.
Speaker 2 (09:31):
That is a really good point, because yeah, I think
there is a level of confidence that appears on social
media profiles and all that which doesn't necessarily exhibit itself
when you meet the person who you know. One person,
their social media profiles don't actually necessary match who you
meet in the st And we're.
Speaker 3 (09:50):
Hard white as human beings to want to fit in
and to belong. And that's you know, that's particularly an
important developmental stage for adolescents and young adults is you know,
you see this kind of drift from the from the
family to friendships.
Speaker 4 (10:03):
But you know as you and who you are. So
I think if you've got some sense.
Speaker 3 (10:09):
Of and I talk about in that list your values,
do you know what your values are? And you can
do that without lessons. There's ways in which you can
sit and talk as a family or do activities with
them to understand what's important to them if you can
have a core fundamental belief in that. My hope and
what I see with young people who do that kind
of work is they are a bit more robust in
(10:29):
being able to like stay grounded, stand on their own
two feet, rather than leaning into having to put up
a certain image through social.
Speaker 4 (10:37):
Media, you know, to their peers all the time to
assimilate with it in So what.
Speaker 2 (10:42):
Would you leave What did you leave home being confident with?
I mean, let's I mean on the basic life skills
side of things, do you how do you reflect? I
mean we've got a list of ten things there, but
just on the general ones to me would be like,
do you know how to cook? Do you know how
to budget shop? You know, budgeting and managing money, But cooking,
(11:02):
to me, that's that was if you go with flatmates.
Everyone in our flat turned up with probably one or
two dishes, and there were five of us. So we
had bolonnaise one night per week and it was always
bolonaise with mixed herbs, and it was just dreadful. There
was meat life one night. I think one of my
(11:22):
my flatmated Dave, did a roast. I still remember David
used to do a killer roast. Always looked forward to
Dave's cooking nights. But what did you what did you
leave home with?
Speaker 3 (11:33):
Well, I imagine I think my My signature dish was
Snitchell Parmigiana that I think.
Speaker 4 (11:40):
Was my.
Speaker 3 (11:43):
I don't think that's flesh cheat meat bread. That was
probably my go to flesh meal as a good scarfye
you know, eden in the day.
Speaker 4 (11:58):
But but the other things, yes, I could budget.
Speaker 3 (12:01):
I you know, I knew how to do my laundry,
you know, so that those kind of fundamentals outside of
having a great group of power of cooking, I think
I managed there, okay. And as I said, I think
when you leave home young, you kind of forced to
grow up and manage that stuff pretty quickly. But I
suppose what this research is, you know, hinting on, or
(12:22):
what it's trying to get to, is we live in
a world now where many families have two working parents,
where you know, to just survive, you know, may mean
that parents aren't at home a lot.
Speaker 4 (12:33):
And human beings learned by seeing right.
Speaker 3 (12:35):
Like I knew to wash my sheets once a week
because I would hear my mum, you know, tell me
every time she did.
Speaker 2 (12:41):
The more, you know, the line you get home.
Speaker 3 (12:45):
On the life, Tuesday was cleaning day. Tuesday was super
market cleaning day. Now my house growing up, vivid memories
of that, but you know, I had a parent that
was present and available to kind of teach me how
to budget or talk me through that. And I think
parents want to be at home as much as perhaps
they were historically, but livelihoods and the way in which
we live can make that harder. So, you know, my
(13:07):
read on this research team was, Okay, how do we
still give young people those life skills?
Speaker 4 (13:12):
Sorry that the neighbors just turned on as lawnmar I
hope you No, I can't hear a thing. You know?
Speaker 3 (13:18):
How do we do that in small moments so we
don't feel like we're overwhelming parents to add another thing
to their to do list.
Speaker 2 (13:23):
So we want to hear from you on this. So
eight hundred eighty ten eighty, what skills do you think
people should learn before they leave home? We'd love to
have your cause on O eight hundred eighty ten eighty.
I will before we go to the break, I will
make my confession because it's a long time ago, and
I used to be reasonably regular with cleaning machines when
(13:45):
I was flatting reasonably being maybe you know, every couple
of weeks and we had we had what's known as
a it's quite prehistoric Jackie. It was a ringer washing machine,
and it was everyone else had decent washing machines, but
for some reason the landlord it was old school, and
I it was a pain because you had to stick
(14:05):
them through the ring then anyway, and I had a
theory and people can just text me on how disgusting
I was on this, but I didn't think I was
particularly But I had a theory that if I had
a shower before I went to bed, then I was
clean getting into bed. So why would my sheets ever
get dirty? So so I went for I'm not sure
(14:26):
if I should say this. I'm gonna look Tyrish Tyra.
Should I say how long I went without washing my
sheets for?
Speaker 4 (14:31):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (14:32):
I went for ten weeks.
Speaker 4 (14:34):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (14:35):
Can I ask the question? Were you the only person
sleeping in that bed?
Speaker 4 (14:38):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (14:39):
I think I revised my policy when I had a
friend and when I put them, when I put them
to the wash, the literally the ring had just instantly
turned to pea soup. And I remember thinking, and I
had to wash them again, that's right, And that's when
I realized that I'd been wrong. But the funny thing
(14:59):
was my friend, my producer, Tyra, she instantly debunked it.
She said, how did it make She said, if you'd
followed your logic, it would mean you'd never have to
change your shower, your towel because you're always clean when
you dry yourself off. And I was like, good point, Tarra,
if i'd thought of that, however, many decades ago, that
is so there we go. There's my confession field that nauseous.
Speaker 4 (15:22):
Doesn't it about that?
Speaker 3 (15:23):
But young young people like potentially go much longer than
that hunch she's moving out of home.
Speaker 2 (15:33):
Okay, what skills should you have? We'd loved it. We've
got a list we're going to work through with Jackie Maguire,
who's our guest today. She's a clinical psychologist who's actually
written about this, a report about this, and we're going
to dig into those who list is very sensible and
I think it's going to be difficult to argue with it,
although I do think it sets the bar quite high
for an eighteen year old. So we're going to dig
(15:54):
into it. What do you reckon and what did you
leave school absolutely happy that you'd nailed that skill and
you thought, thank goodness, Mum told me to or Dad
told me to do X Y and zed, we'd love
your cause on this one hundred and eighty ten eighty.
It's twenty two past five. News Talk said B. News
Talk said B. This is the Parents Squad. We're with
(16:15):
doctor Jackie mcguish's clinical psychologist, talking about your preparedness when
you were young to leave home. But what skills would
you really want any young person to have before they
leave home? Because you might say there are certain things
they'll pick up. Maybe having a couple of recipes that's enough,
get them a book cooking for flat mates. I think
that's what mine was called. God, the recipes are basic
in that one. But anyway, let's take your calls. Tim.
Speaker 5 (16:37):
Hello, you go, Tim? How are you good?
Speaker 2 (16:40):
Thanks?
Speaker 4 (16:41):
Hey?
Speaker 2 (16:42):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (16:42):
So what I can tell you when I finished intermediate
school at the end of nineteen eighty two, thanks to
those two years, like we had a home economics okay,
so I learned how to like do basic sewing, like
how to he any trousers that go and think ah,
(17:05):
I cooked pretty wealth and that was probably more ninety
percent from home, but more areas of baking. I guess
out of home economics, would you know good basics of
woodwar metal craft? So I don't know as they relate
to yeah, like things and moving away from home. Yes, cooking, sewing,
(17:30):
so you could you know, to look at you housers
or whatever or.
Speaker 2 (17:33):
Skit impressive that's at the age of what eleven and
twelve you could do that.
Speaker 5 (17:40):
You know, That's just how I was. It was fantastic,
I mean, and it was a great time. I mean
I was in no way academic at any point of
my school life. Just wasn't into it. Give me sports,
(18:01):
give me other interests, and you had my attention, you know.
Nineteen eighty three when I went into third form, I
was really at sea there for a number of reasons,
what of bullying, that kind of things I didn't take. Luckily,
we went to Australia and I had a year off them,
re entered school in Western Australia and they had the
(18:25):
most incredible sex education lessons. Yeah, that was pretty handy
leaving you know, it was just open, it was it
was all medical terms and well there was no mean
us about it.
Speaker 2 (18:42):
That is actually I think for leaving home that isn't
and I mean probably kids should have those lessons before
they're leaving home Jackie. But Tim's touched on that as well,
but the whole sex education and because you know, it's
one thing to be living at home and parents having
a rough idea where you were are or aren't. But
once you're left home, you really need to know everything
about keeping yourself safe, don't you.
Speaker 3 (19:03):
Yeah, absolutely, And I think education plays a huge role
in that. I think it's both if we can at
home and school. But same happened to media a little
few decades. Slave shift him. Now we did the same thing.
We rotated between sewing and cooking.
Speaker 4 (19:16):
And would work, and you know it is.
Speaker 3 (19:19):
It is fantastic, I think to be able to teach
young young children basic life skills.
Speaker 2 (19:24):
The button sewing thing. Actually, I don't know if I
could now, but I used to. That was one of
the things I think Mum taught me was this is
how you sew on a button.
Speaker 4 (19:36):
And I don't think I have caught on that many times.
Speaker 2 (19:39):
I do not think I ever understood how it worked.
But I poked the needle through the hole and I
looped it through and then broke it off and they
and they stayed on generally, but I still don't think
I know how I did it. It's like one of
those just just do this trust me, keep going and
then just cut it off and away you go.
Speaker 3 (19:58):
And I suppose there are skills that are nice to
have than those that are essential. Right, And so again,
if you're prioritizing the button, sewing's useful, probably know how
I'm just knowing how to sustain yourself and feed yourself,
and you know, keep your sheets clean so you don't
get infections.
Speaker 2 (20:15):
Oh my god, I can't believe I did share that,
but I had to be honest. I mean, I only
did it for one term and the rest I got
back on the I got back on the program. Anyway,
what do you reckon that? What are the top life
skills that every key we kids should know before they
leave home? I think we can look and even the
cooking thing. Here's the thing. I didn't have a clue
(20:37):
about nutrition. I had no idea. So the first time
of my life when I left home Jackie, I put
on weight because I could not walk past the sausages,
chips and gravy. And I had it. I knew that
it was probably not perfect. But if I knew what
I knew about nutrition, I might have just had it
once a week, as opposed to a maide of mine,
(20:58):
we used to go what are you doing? I mean sausages,
chips and gravy, but it wasn't healthy.
Speaker 3 (21:04):
Well, I knowledge growing up with food Pyramid obviously is
what we were taught around nutrition. But you know, when
I think we look at you know, how do we
make this practical for families, because knowing what to feed
your body is really important from you know, not just
an energy perspective, but actually a mental health perspective.
Speaker 4 (21:22):
And we've got a mental health crisis in this country.
So putting good.
Speaker 3 (21:25):
Food in your body helps your mood. And so if
we can support young people to know what quantities or
or what's the balance in their diet, that's really helpful.
And you know this research that you're noting has come
from Hello Fresh. We've got a range of food boxes
that you can get in this country, and I think
being able to have fever systems like that where you've
(21:47):
got recipes where families can come together and learn how
to cook. All the ingredients are there and they have
that kind of info on the recipe. You hope if
you can do that a couple of times a week
or a couple of times a month with your children,
they actually start to soak some of that and it
sits there for when it's needed than their brain.
Speaker 2 (22:06):
It's interesting, yeah, because we ate healthily at home, but
we just ate what Mum cooked, and I don't we
just because it was the New Zealand diet was fairly
it was a sort of fairly standard diet, probably fairly
a fair amount of red meat. But I don't think
I went to university having much of a clue about
fat content, because everyone was like, remember there was a
thing where sugar was the devil, then fat was the deal,
(22:27):
and it was sugar was the devil, and then.
Speaker 3 (22:30):
Was on the accn stant and all their head was
oh godt yes. But again I had some friends at
university that were really knowledgeable about that, but we didn't
talk about that in my family either, tim, but some
people obviously do. I actually imagine again, young people are
more clued up on that ban us because of social media,
(22:50):
and they do seem to have awareness of things greater
than them, perhaps topics we would have looked into, or
facts that we would have known.
Speaker 4 (22:58):
But cooking is an interesting one, isn't it.
Speaker 3 (23:00):
Because when I thought about the power of cooking, my
husband and I just watched the film Netflix recently called Nonnas.
It's a twenty twenty five film and Spawn and it's
about him growing up learning how to cook from his grandmother,
and then when he becomes an adult, he wants to
open a restaurant where Italian honors come and they are
the chefs, so you get like proper Italian nonna food.
Speaker 4 (23:23):
And so.
Speaker 3 (23:25):
I suppose teaching your children life skills isn't just about
the practicalities. It's connection and it's often for people it's
times of love and culture and family history and that
stuff's actually really important for your well being too.
Speaker 2 (23:40):
Yeah right, we'd love to set your course on this.
What do you think the essential skills for kids are
before they leave home? And what did you know as well?
Phil good E?
Speaker 5 (23:50):
Good, how are you all right?
Speaker 2 (23:52):
Thanks?
Speaker 6 (23:53):
Good one? And Jerkie how are you?
Speaker 4 (23:55):
I'm good? Thank you.
Speaker 6 (23:57):
That's excellent. I love for rewards. So I loved your
theory on the sheets. That made me laugh.
Speaker 2 (24:05):
Well, yeah, I mean I did it once and look
those days along gone funny enough, I still remember the
reason I stopped doing that as well. And it's funny
you remember all the people in your life around that time.
But I'm not going to reminisce anymore film.
Speaker 4 (24:18):
They might not be radio appropriate.
Speaker 2 (24:19):
No, no, no, no, let's carry on. For what are
you What did you know when you left home?
Speaker 6 (24:24):
Well, I was going to say, don't worry, I don't judge. Well,
I was going to say, also, I love that point,
Jackie that you said about knowing yourself and your core
values and having an idea of who you are. I
thought that was brilliant, because yeah, you're probably less likely
to make bad decisions. I seen this, I've seen the logic,
and now I thought that was great, A great point
(24:45):
I had. I had absolutely, I learned absolutely, like I
had no skills when I left home, and when I
left school, even though we had economics at intermediate as well,
and we learned to sew and cook and but but
the time I got through high school and that and
left time, i'd forgotten everything and everything done for me
at home too, so I never had to cook her anything,
(25:07):
and so I never took any interest either and asking
mum and that was, you know, when she was cooking.
But I think the two two important things for me
that I think would be great, and you've said them already,
as learning to cook, because I think you go out
and if you've got a basic knowledge of learning how
to cook, not only you're learning how to make yourself
(25:28):
a good, decent, nutritious meal, but you also learn how
to do it cheap as well, so you don't need
to spend a whole unnecessary money, you know, you just, yeah,
you've got a basic idea you can whip up a
nice nutritious meal without him to spend a lot of money.
So I think that's a vital skill. And also learning
to have a bit of budgeting skill as well, so
you know, you learn how to, yeah, pay your bills,
(25:50):
handle your money, but get into some saving habits and
that sort of thing.
Speaker 2 (25:54):
They time to each other, don't they phil Because if
you can't if you can't cook, then you're going to
be eating out and the money is going out the
window straight away, isn't it.
Speaker 6 (26:02):
Yeah, well that's what I was thinking too, because that
was the other thing going to say, like, you're also
going to save yourself money if you're learning to cook
as well. So what you said the budgeting, they tie in.
There's a relationship.
Speaker 2 (26:11):
What skill did you notice? I don't know how I
have to remember that. What skill did you notice? All, hell,
I don't know how to do this. I've been to
learn pretty quickly.
Speaker 6 (26:22):
Well, it was probably the cooking. Probably the cooking was
the one. I was sort of all right with money,
like I had a sort of an ability to be
able to save money or you know, sort of realized
that I had to save money. But yeah, the cooking.
(26:42):
I was really green on the cooking, and it was like, oh,
I'm going to be spending a lot of money on
takeaways because I simply come you know, I didn't know
how to make even a simple meal like a spaghetti bowl,
you know, skiddy bo naise or a macaroni cheese or
because you know, we're and if I did, if I
could cook, I mean I could boil a potato as
they say, you know that I could show that far.
(27:04):
But cooking was the one.
Speaker 4 (27:06):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (27:06):
Yeah, good on your fell actually, Jackie. I mean, it's
an interesting looking at your list. In fact, I'll read
them out. The top ten life skills every key wee
kid should know before they leave home. Knowing yourself. We've
discussed that a little bit. Knowing yourself and what matters
to you, cooking and looking after your body. I mean,
because there's sort of ten points, but they're more like
(27:28):
twenty in a way, aren't they? Cooking and looking m Ramon? Well,
looking out your body, So that's cooking, but also nutrition.
That's knowing how to look out yourself and manage yourself.
Speaker 3 (27:38):
But it's also exercise, it's also sleeping. Well, you know,
all of those factors lead to good physical and mental health.
Speaker 2 (27:46):
Budgeting and managing money, yes important. You find that out
pretty quickly when you suddenly find him got enough money
in you. I wonder how many people learn budgeting really
quickly because they run out of money.
Speaker 3 (27:59):
Well, I definitely didn't learn that at school. But the
rule that was in my family growing up was a
job I got my I was talking to it about
it about a girlfriend about this last night.
Speaker 4 (28:09):
Actually I got my first job.
Speaker 3 (28:11):
I might have been eight or nine, and I used
to press nepkins for the fancy restaurant down the road
and put me on crates, so I'd stand on three
or four crates to reach the pressing machine and I'd
press the neck. And so I had a job from
a really young age. And you know, followed by paper
runs and fish and chip shops and et cetera. And
the rule always in our house was you can spend
(28:32):
half that you have to save half, and I think
you know that. I mean that's budgeting at a very
basic level. But when you get taught there from a
young age, I think that does stick with you, this
idea that you just don't go and splash it.
Speaker 4 (28:43):
You do. You have to be sensible and safe.
Speaker 2 (28:46):
So you've got something here, like and knowing when and
how to ask for help. I mean, these are actually
things they're touching on deeper, totally deeper worries that every
parent has, but actually you don't. I never had that
conversation with mum, probably mum or dad. But yeah, I
mean that's an interesting one. If if you were to
have hit the big outside world and find you're not coping,
(29:07):
would you recognize that? I mean, these are these are
the much bigger, more serious questions that you'd want your
children and.
Speaker 3 (29:14):
The other So, yes, been able to recognize when you're
struggling and know when to ask for help and that
it's okay to the help. But you know the other
big thing I think on there, well, there's a couple
from a psychological perspective, that's important being able to regulate
your mood. So knowing when you're having an emotional feeling
and being able to regulate the unhelpful ones. When you
(29:35):
look at research around mental health and living well, that
is like a critical skill that we never got taught,
really well.
Speaker 4 (29:44):
I did.
Speaker 3 (29:44):
I was raised by a psychologists and a social worker,
but not everybody had not everybody had family star plates
and you know, long conversations at their dinner table. Most
of us, you know, didn't, and so that's really important.
And I think the other one is actually problem solving.
So we live in a world of AI. You want
to look up a recipe, you know, or ask a question.
The facts are there, but can you critically look at
(30:07):
information and can you problem solve? For example, I've spent
all my money, I'm out fletting, I'm living. What am
I going to do about that? Who I need to
ask for help? Or I've got you know, I don't
know twelve dollars left. What's the best way of navigating that?
Actually being able to look at facts and information and
think critically and problem solve. I think it crosses you know,
(30:28):
many areas of skills that are helpful to young people.
Speaker 2 (30:32):
Yeah, actually we need to take a break, but we're
going to come back with some more conversation around this,
but we love your cause. Eight hundred eighty ten and eight.
What are the skills you would want any young person
in your life to leave home with? What would you
want them to know? And what would what would you
sort of be? Well, that's important, but they can learn
that along the way. Give us a call. Eight hundred
(30:54):
eighty ten and eight where with Jackie McGuire and it
is gosh, time is flying. It's twenty to six back
in a mine. Yes, I'm with doctor Jackie McGuire. She's
a clinical psychologist. We're talking about what are the essential
life skills that our kids really need to know before
they head it into the real world. They really need
to know. It's an interesting one, isn't it? Because unless
Jackie that because like you like to think that your
(31:17):
kids are still in touch with you so they can
pick up the phone, so in a way, the things
you really need to know. Sorry, we're going to say
something there.
Speaker 4 (31:25):
I'm like, I've got it.
Speaker 3 (31:26):
I'm thinking of something in the ad break and what
I was thinking about because I've got three girls and
so you know, I think, what would I want them
to fundamentally know? Or think about when they are talking here,
just little sex four and two? Okay, away, I'm in
the grind. I'm just happy if I get a full
night sleep. But I think, yes, I think it is really.
Speaker 4 (31:50):
Important that they can cook and laundry and do their stuff.
Speaker 3 (31:53):
But fundamentally, what do I really want them to know?
I was thinking about things like can they be critically
thinking around whether somebody is a good person? Am I
making a good friend? Is this person I want to
date a good person?
Speaker 4 (32:07):
You know?
Speaker 3 (32:07):
Actually being able to have some level of awareness of
good relationships are back and forward judgments around we take
judgment around people, which comes into that do I know myself?
Critical analysis? Being able to ask for help if things
don't be all right? So you know, I suppose I
sit here with a psychological head on right and there
are absolute practical things for life. But like when I
(32:28):
think about my girls, I want them to be keeping
themselves fake and healthy and well, I think.
Speaker 2 (32:33):
That's and you've touched on something as you were describing that.
I think there are when we think about and the
skills you need to learn to go flatting. It's a
bit like you know, there are things you can teach
your kids in the matter of a few months. You
can say, right, let's learn how to peel a spud,
you know, Crocker.
Speaker 4 (32:47):
Sausage, which is great, great to do that.
Speaker 2 (32:50):
But the stuff that you're talking about is it's it's
it's the stuff that I'm working on my wife and
I would be focused on with our girls right now.
And so it's the lesson that you do not want
them to be learning last minute. You're not going to
teach to them about trust, about making good choices and friendships.
You're not going to teach that. You're not going to
(33:10):
cram that in. And what it does what you've said
as highlights, I guess how important it is about. I
don't want to get all worthy and lectury lecturing should
I say pronunciation, but it does. It's a good reminder
for parents you've got to be present for years and
(33:30):
years before you know, don't leave these things to say
you're crown.
Speaker 3 (33:35):
Whilay the foundations with not the two year old, but
with the four and the six year old all the time,
and there's small micro moments of conversation, right.
Speaker 4 (33:42):
Like was that a good choice? How do you think
you'd you know, it wasn't a good choice. But I'm
going to ask you it it's a cretic way.
Speaker 2 (33:50):
Was it a good choice?
Speaker 4 (33:51):
How do you think you'd feel? Or what is a
good friend, or you know, things that actually, as a
young adult, you know, you think about leaving home and
leaving your security blanket of home.
Speaker 3 (34:00):
If you're somebody that comes from a safe and loving home,
that there is an Unfortunately that's not the case for everyone,
but if you've had a sheltered life, then you're out
there as a young adult.
Speaker 4 (34:12):
Actually, they are the things.
Speaker 3 (34:13):
You need to navigate. Who do I choose to be
in my flat? Like this makes some good choices about
what makes a flatmate? Or you know, when I got
a university, can I determine or if I'm choosing a
trade or a job, what do I want to do.
Speaker 4 (34:25):
Rather than what are my friends doing? Or I think
some of those deeper reflective critical analysis, you know, problem
solving skills are really important.
Speaker 2 (34:35):
Actually, that's an interesting one, even the choosing of flatmates.
I ended up in the flat that I ended up
with because it was connected through I think it was
the guy who I played, who played in the same
sports team as me. He was in a flat and
so he must I think he must have invited me in,
and it was so it was always who you knew,
(34:55):
which sort of looked after that a little bit in
a way. But it's not always quite as similar.
Speaker 4 (35:00):
As how to manage conflict. So I'm pretty pretty sure
that was on the list too, like how do you navigate?
Speaker 2 (35:04):
I didn't get through that.
Speaker 4 (35:06):
Did I put that onto?
Speaker 3 (35:08):
It's also a useful skill, and I'm not thinking that
young people will be pro at this. I mean I
coach people all through their life, you know, seeing your executives,
and there's sixties that haven't nailed that skill. But having
some awareness of okay, you know, if I'm having struggles
with a friend or a partner or a flat mate,
you know, is it you know, if I stick my
head in the scene and avoid that likelihood, it's going
(35:30):
to get worse. So actually one of my ways of
trying to navigate that, like some basic understanding of that,
I think is really helpful for young people.
Speaker 2 (35:38):
I'm just remembering all these I remember getting home flat mart.
He's actually was an okay guy, but he had terrible
taste amusing and he used to blast it up, you know,
to he was probably quite hard to live with but
you just put up with it. But I do remember
getting home one long weekend and I luckily I had
a car. It was an old Dunger of a forty escort.
But literally my other flat mate, one of my other
(36:01):
flat mates and I we literally went away for the
weekend because we got home and thought, I can't do
that this easter. Let's go, let's go there there. But
I guess that's also I don't know what that's the story.
It's just about the fact that flatting is also.
Speaker 3 (36:12):
If you were able to say to him and then
not not in the moment, but the next day or whatever, hey,
totally get that you love your music. Would you mind, like,
can we have a conversation as a flat when we
cut that off on you know, like imagine if you
could have had that conversation.
Speaker 2 (36:28):
Gosh, I can't imagine. I mean it's a long time ago.
By the way, did you say Murray's Bay Intermediate was
that you were one of my callers?
Speaker 4 (36:38):
I was parted to media girl.
Speaker 2 (36:40):
It was just somebody else saying as as said, we
had home ac classes at Murray's Bay Intermediate. Was a
great class actually that they did those kids. It does
kids a favor when they have those sorts of learn
those skills, isn't it.
Speaker 4 (36:53):
I don't know whether they still do, but it'd be
interesting to know. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (36:58):
Another one says, I think you've got to teach some
of the your technically sew on a button. I didn't
teach my son and recently had to sew on a
button on a ceremonial jacket five minutes before presentation. Well, yeah,
I guess So what else have we got, dear tim
and lovely guest.
Speaker 4 (37:17):
Indeed, thank you.
Speaker 2 (37:19):
The greatest skill I learned at home economics was knocking
up a ripper of an omelet. That's from Ryan Sparky. Actually,
I think just having a dishort. How many meals do
you need? A couple?
Speaker 4 (37:32):
Three?
Speaker 2 (37:33):
Three?
Speaker 4 (37:33):
I don't know, not many.
Speaker 2 (37:35):
You know, I should think you should know how to
cook eggs.
Speaker 3 (37:38):
I mean, well, I was about to say a lot
of people. I've heard many a story of people not
knowing how to boil an egg, which careful.
Speaker 2 (37:45):
Well, it's still quite a controversy. Controversy should I say
on that? You know the one? This is the list
that you've knocked up here? Number ten is interesting one
because I think many students who go to university would
probably not do much of this because they make a
pain of the pain in the backside of themselves. In
(38:06):
the communities that arrive in, you've got respecting culture and community,
which I wouldn't say is essential. It's just a nice
to have.
Speaker 3 (38:13):
Oh I see, I think it is essential in terms
of fundamentally, we only flourish if we feel like we belong,
and so we belong in our communities. In part of
living a good life is having purposes wider than yourself.
That's really clear in the research.
Speaker 2 (38:31):
Actually, I'm trying to think. I think I learnt that
through going through leaving home because of who I encountered
in my halls of residence, people from different countries. And
it wasn't that I needed to learn it. How do
I put this? Because but I learned just by virtue
of meeting people from different cultures and getting on with
(38:54):
them that it was sort of it wasn't a prerequisite
for me, but it was having an open mind. I
guess you know what I mean. I'm stumbling with this
because I you know, I came from Roderua. I mean,
I was quite aware of Mari culture and European New
Zealand culture in general, but through you. But when I
went to university I met people from quite different cultures.
(39:18):
I had an Islamic guy who was I didn't really
think anything of it other than he had different beliefs.
Speaker 3 (39:24):
But I think when you get exposed to a wide
range of cultures and you'd take time to know people
rather than view it from afar. But if you get
to know people, I think it makes you less judgmental
and gives.
Speaker 4 (39:36):
You an appreciation wider perhaps than if you don't get
that exposure.
Speaker 2 (39:43):
There possibly a few people listening now though, who are
going out and getting the book Cooking for flatmates. Hey Jackie,
have you are you taking a break over Christmas? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (39:53):
I actually thought I was finished, so you're a little
extra surprise, which was so lovely.
Speaker 2 (40:01):
He's looked at me thought, oh damn, I've got to
go and z be with beverage.
Speaker 3 (40:06):
Well I was at a Christmas party and I've left.
They had a level of done afai. This is not
normal for eight three children at home, just for us.
We're heading to Sunny Nelson.
Speaker 2 (40:15):
Okay, Well, hey jack you really appreciate you coming on
today and we look forward to talking again. Sometime.
Speaker 4 (40:21):
Thank you you too, have a wonderful Christmas.
Speaker 2 (40:23):
Break you too. Bye bye, We'll be back to wrap
things up in just a moment. That's eight minutes to six.
News Talks it Be.
Speaker 1 (40:28):
For more from the weekend collective, listen live to News
Talks it Be weekends from three pm, or follow the
podcast on iHeartRadio
You're listening to the Weekend Collective podcast from News Talk SEDB.
Speaker 2 (00:45):
Yes's welcome back to the Weekend Collective. A little bit
of band aid there, I think, gosh, I wonder how
old that song is actually? Do they know that it's Christmas?
It's I don't want to say, I don't know. I
suspect it's more likely to be closer to something like
thirty years old than twenty years old, but who knows.
But anyway, welcome back to the show. But don't forget
if you've missed any of the previous hours, you can go.
(01:07):
After six o'clock, you can go and check out the
podcast and the hours will be up there. We get
them up pretty quickly once the show has concluded. But
right now we want your calls on eight hundred and
eighty ten eighty. And what we're going to discuss this
afternoon is, you know, it's the end of the year.
You know your kids might have finished exams waiting for results,
(01:29):
and anyway they're going to be heading out into the
real world. They might be going out to rent, they
might be heading down to university, they might be heading anywhere,
but they might be hitting out your front door. And
what are the essential life skills that our children, our
kids really need to know before they head out of
the head away from home. Seventy seven percent of parents
(01:51):
say it's vital to learn to cook, Yet sixty percent
believe today's children are less likely to pick up cooking
skills than when they grew up. But anyway, the ability
to cook is one thing only. There's also the question, Oh,
my goodness, this cuts close to here, and I've got
a very I've got a very questionable story to share
with you of my own, which involves quite a significant confession.
(02:13):
But anyway, how often to wash their sheets? It's related
to that, how to cook a basic meal, managing bills, payments,
doing the laundry without turning your white shirts pink. I
guess that's because you wash them with something that's red.
Probably that's how it works. Yes, it is a blue
based read, of course. Anyway, what do you learn? What
(02:33):
did you learn? And what what would you want your
children to be competent with by the time they leave home.
Only twenty one percent of parents of children age five
to seventeen say their kids are often involved with cooking.
So that's seventy nine percent who might leave home without
knowing how to much cook much more than toasted cheese.
So yeah, what are the most important skills children need
(02:55):
to know? What did you know? What were you taught
before you left home? And what did you wish you
were taught? We want your calls on eight hundred and
eighty ten eighty text too and to discuss this. She
is a clinical psychologist and her name is Jackie mcguah. Actually,
jack it's been a while since we had you on
the show.
Speaker 3 (03:14):
Hello, Hello, And like before we talk about the topic
at hand.
Speaker 4 (03:18):
That is my favorite Christmas song? Do they know? It's
Christmas time? And it came out in nineteen eighty four,
it's forty two years old.
Speaker 2 (03:24):
Oh my goodness.
Speaker 4 (03:27):
That you chose my favorite, so good picking you.
Speaker 2 (03:29):
Must have not even been born then.
Speaker 3 (03:32):
I'm not going to disclose my age, but that could
be a good assumption.
Speaker 2 (03:38):
Wow, because I am old enough to actually remember when
it came out.
Speaker 4 (03:43):
And they did a remake. Oh, okay, twenty seventeen or something.
Speaker 2 (03:47):
Maybe actually I do remember something like that. In fact,
I don't know if the remake was particularly any good.
Speaker 4 (03:52):
Was it was? It was okay? But the original is
definitely Oh you.
Speaker 2 (03:57):
Know what, I'm remembering that it's reminding me of the
Love Actually movie where he the guy is making a
Christmas song.
Speaker 4 (04:05):
And I can't vision of lover us all around lovers.
Speaker 2 (04:08):
Yeah, that's right, And I keep telling myself I'm not
going to watch that film again because I've seen Love
Actually a zillion times.
Speaker 4 (04:18):
But you can go and see it with a live
orchestra this year. That would be quite magical.
Speaker 2 (04:23):
That probably would be quite nice, wouldn't it. I do
have a funny story to tell about that. I am
apparently one of the teachers at a particular school that
I won't necessarily name. I thought it might be fun
for the kids who are twelve years old to watch
the movie and had forgotten that there is some slightly
gratuitous nudity. Y she said, to be like, oh my goodness,
(04:48):
to fast forward because it is a sort of wholesome
memory of the movie is wholesome, but it's got some
strange bit some nudity it does.
Speaker 3 (04:57):
Anyway, Anyway, you didn't bring the clem psicon to talk
about music, did you.
Speaker 2 (05:01):
Uh? Well, no, although you know it's Christmas music. Hey,
now do you remember what skills you look? I'm going
to be I'm guessing most girls women leave home with
better skills than guys, and I'm just being take my guess.
Speaker 3 (05:19):
I didn't know how to cook very well. I probably
still don't. Like I'm not not the primary ship in
our house. I can bait, but no, I wasn't a
great cook.
Speaker 4 (05:31):
But I did do things.
Speaker 3 (05:33):
Like I know how to do the laundry. I knew
how to keep my room tidy like I knew. I
knew that you always wash wash your sheets in your
towers once a week. It was the rule growing up
in our half. You know, I would have known how
to put a growthery list together. I think I budgeted
very well from a.
Speaker 4 (05:50):
Young age, so I had I had a good.
Speaker 3 (05:52):
Level of life skills. I left home at seventeen and
went into a hostel. You know, you had to grow
up real fast when you leave home young.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
Actually, in a hostel, they changed. Do you have to
wash your own sheets in a hospital or they drop
your linen?
Speaker 3 (06:05):
Do know you had a combined you know, shared laundry
down the bottom of the building, so the frequency of
sheet washing would have vary greatly in there.
Speaker 2 (06:14):
I yeah, I reckon what do you this is? I'm
not sure whether to share my confession. Quite yet, it's
too a conversation. How frequent, No, well, generally quite frequently,
although on this show or in talk back, I think
there was there was a survey done about half people
wash their sheets, and I think the national averages once
every two weeks. Does that surprise you?
Speaker 4 (06:38):
That's better than I thought.
Speaker 2 (06:40):
Okay, I will confess by the way that the ten
life skills, there's been a report done, actually was done.
Speaker 4 (06:47):
It was written by me.
Speaker 3 (06:49):
It's not and you can't clasify the ten life skills
of the report, but the research wasn't done by me.
The life skills were what I thought would be good
life skills for young people to have when they flew
the coop.
Speaker 2 (07:03):
I was interested to the first one sets the bar
quite high because I think there are people who probably
hit their forties and fifties, they still don't know yourself
and what matters to you.
Speaker 3 (07:14):
I know, see that Goods the psychologist put that one
up the top, doesn't she.
Speaker 4 (07:18):
You know, it's funny.
Speaker 3 (07:19):
Growing up, my favorite movie was notting Hill, which has
got a similar feel to Love It actually doesn't it.
And there's a scene in there when Julia Roberts is
talking about you know, she's probably in her forties or
maybe she's in her firties, and she said she doesn't
know how she likes her eggs, because every partner she's
been with, she just merges into their into their desires
and likes and identity. So does she likes fried eggs
(07:42):
or post eggs or scrambled eggs? And you know, she
was singled for the first time in her life, and
that was her kind of, you know, way of saying,
I have no idea who I am unless I'm attached
to somebody else. And so I think if we can
raise children that have some sense of what's important, you know,
like if you go from a moral perspective, what is
meaningful to me? What matters? Where are my lines things
(08:05):
that are important? If we can get young people to
have some sense of the fundamentals, I think that's really
important because yes, young children will you know, adolescents, young adults.
I'll go and have fun and they might do some
things that aren't great decisions. But if their fundamentals are
there about who they are as a p in person,
I think it will peat them within a good bandwidth.
Speaker 2 (08:25):
I actually reckon that this generation of young people are
more likely to be on top of it than previous generations,
including my own. I just have the sense that my daughters.
Maybe it's because I've got daughters, and I don't know
whether they're whether girls grow up a bit quicker or whatever,
but I have a sense that they are going to
(08:45):
know who they are, they do know who they are,
or they're learning that they're twelve and fourteen, thirteen and fourteen,
Whereas I don't think I had a clue. I knew
I liked sport and stuff, but I didn't really know
the big questions about what I wanted to do with
I didn't even know what I wanted to do when
I went to university.
Speaker 3 (09:00):
Even though I'm stuck with my response to that term,
because I think, on one hand, yes, I think younger
generations do have better self awareness. They're taught about, you know,
how to identify feelings and regulate and do like we
weren't talk that at school, but they do that now.
You know, Like my young children come home from school
and they talk about being in the red zone or
staffish breathing to.
Speaker 4 (09:19):
Calm down, and you know, so obviously they're having those
conversations at school but on the other hand, in a
world of social media, do they know who they are
or do they know what they want to present to
the world, And those two things are quite different.
Speaker 2 (09:31):
That is a really good point, because yeah, I think
there is a level of confidence that appears on social
media profiles and all that which doesn't necessarily exhibit itself
when you meet the person who you know. One person,
their social media profiles don't actually necessary match who you
meet in the st And we're.
Speaker 3 (09:50):
Hard white as human beings to want to fit in
and to belong. And that's you know, that's particularly an
important developmental stage for adolescents and young adults is you know,
you see this kind of drift from the from the
family to friendships.
Speaker 4 (10:03):
But you know as you and who you are. So
I think if you've got some sense.
Speaker 3 (10:09):
Of and I talk about in that list your values,
do you know what your values are? And you can
do that without lessons. There's ways in which you can
sit and talk as a family or do activities with
them to understand what's important to them if you can
have a core fundamental belief in that. My hope and
what I see with young people who do that kind
of work is they are a bit more robust in
(10:29):
being able to like stay grounded, stand on their own
two feet, rather than leaning into having to put up
a certain image through social.
Speaker 4 (10:37):
Media, you know, to their peers all the time to
assimilate with it in So what.
Speaker 2 (10:42):
Would you leave What did you leave home being confident with?
I mean, let's I mean on the basic life skills
side of things, do you how do you reflect? I
mean we've got a list of ten things there, but
just on the general ones to me would be like,
do you know how to cook? Do you know how
to budget shop? You know, budgeting and managing money, But cooking,
(11:02):
to me, that's that was if you go with flatmates.
Everyone in our flat turned up with probably one or
two dishes, and there were five of us. So we
had bolonnaise one night per week and it was always
bolonaise with mixed herbs, and it was just dreadful. There
was meat life one night. I think one of my
(11:22):
my flatmated Dave, did a roast. I still remember David
used to do a killer roast. Always looked forward to
Dave's cooking nights. But what did you what did you
leave home with?
Speaker 3 (11:33):
Well, I imagine I think my My signature dish was
Snitchell Parmigiana that I think.
Speaker 4 (11:40):
Was my.
Speaker 3 (11:43):
I don't think that's flesh cheat meat bread. That was
probably my go to flesh meal as a good scarfye
you know, eden in the day.
Speaker 4 (11:58):
But but the other things, yes, I could budget.
Speaker 3 (12:01):
I you know, I knew how to do my laundry,
you know, so that those kind of fundamentals outside of
having a great group of power of cooking, I think
I managed there, okay. And as I said, I think
when you leave home young, you kind of forced to
grow up and manage that stuff pretty quickly. But I
suppose what this research is, you know, hinting on, or
(12:22):
what it's trying to get to, is we live in
a world now where many families have two working parents,
where you know, to just survive, you know, may mean
that parents aren't at home a lot.
Speaker 4 (12:33):
And human beings learned by seeing right.
Speaker 3 (12:35):
Like I knew to wash my sheets once a week
because I would hear my mum, you know, tell me
every time she did.
Speaker 2 (12:41):
The more, you know, the line you get home.
Speaker 3 (12:45):
On the life, Tuesday was cleaning day. Tuesday was super
market cleaning day. Now my house growing up, vivid memories
of that, but you know, I had a parent that
was present and available to kind of teach me how
to budget or talk me through that. And I think
parents want to be at home as much as perhaps
they were historically, but livelihoods and the way in which
we live can make that harder. So, you know, my
(13:07):
read on this research team was, Okay, how do we
still give young people those life skills?
Speaker 4 (13:12):
Sorry that the neighbors just turned on as lawnmar I
hope you No, I can't hear a thing. You know?
Speaker 3 (13:18):
How do we do that in small moments so we
don't feel like we're overwhelming parents to add another thing
to their to do list.
Speaker 2 (13:23):
So we want to hear from you on this. So
eight hundred eighty ten eighty, what skills do you think
people should learn before they leave home? We'd love to
have your cause on O eight hundred eighty ten eighty.
I will before we go to the break, I will
make my confession because it's a long time ago, and
I used to be reasonably regular with cleaning machines when
(13:45):
I was flatting reasonably being maybe you know, every couple
of weeks and we had we had what's known as
a it's quite prehistoric Jackie. It was a ringer washing machine,
and it was everyone else had decent washing machines, but
for some reason the landlord it was old school, and
I it was a pain because you had to stick
(14:05):
them through the ring then anyway, and I had a
theory and people can just text me on how disgusting
I was on this, but I didn't think I was
particularly But I had a theory that if I had
a shower before I went to bed, then I was
clean getting into bed. So why would my sheets ever
get dirty? So so I went for I'm not sure
(14:26):
if I should say this. I'm gonna look Tyrish Tyra.
Should I say how long I went without washing my
sheets for?
Speaker 4 (14:31):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (14:32):
I went for ten weeks.
Speaker 4 (14:34):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (14:35):
Can I ask the question? Were you the only person
sleeping in that bed?
Speaker 4 (14:38):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (14:39):
I think I revised my policy when I had a
friend and when I put them, when I put them
to the wash, the literally the ring had just instantly
turned to pea soup. And I remember thinking, and I
had to wash them again, that's right, And that's when
I realized that I'd been wrong. But the funny thing
(14:59):
was my friend, my producer, Tyra, she instantly debunked it.
She said, how did it make She said, if you'd
followed your logic, it would mean you'd never have to
change your shower, your towel because you're always clean when
you dry yourself off. And I was like, good point, Tarra,
if i'd thought of that, however, many decades ago, that
is so there we go. There's my confession field that nauseous.
Speaker 4 (15:22):
Doesn't it about that?
Speaker 3 (15:23):
But young young people like potentially go much longer than
that hunch she's moving out of home.
Speaker 2 (15:33):
Okay, what skills should you have? We'd loved it. We've
got a list we're going to work through with Jackie Maguire,
who's our guest today. She's a clinical psychologist who's actually
written about this, a report about this, and we're going
to dig into those who list is very sensible and
I think it's going to be difficult to argue with it,
although I do think it sets the bar quite high
for an eighteen year old. So we're going to dig
(15:54):
into it. What do you reckon and what did you
leave school absolutely happy that you'd nailed that skill and
you thought, thank goodness, Mum told me to or Dad
told me to do X Y and zed, we'd love
your cause on this one hundred and eighty ten eighty.
It's twenty two past five. News Talk said B. News
Talk said B. This is the Parents Squad. We're with
(16:15):
doctor Jackie mcguish's clinical psychologist, talking about your preparedness when
you were young to leave home. But what skills would
you really want any young person to have before they
leave home? Because you might say there are certain things
they'll pick up. Maybe having a couple of recipes that's enough,
get them a book cooking for flat mates. I think
that's what mine was called. God, the recipes are basic
in that one. But anyway, let's take your calls. Tim.
Speaker 5 (16:37):
Hello, you go, Tim? How are you good?
Speaker 2 (16:40):
Thanks?
Speaker 4 (16:41):
Hey?
Speaker 2 (16:42):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (16:42):
So what I can tell you when I finished intermediate
school at the end of nineteen eighty two, thanks to
those two years, like we had a home economics okay,
so I learned how to like do basic sewing, like
how to he any trousers that go and think ah,
(17:05):
I cooked pretty wealth and that was probably more ninety
percent from home, but more areas of baking. I guess
out of home economics, would you know good basics of
woodwar metal craft? So I don't know as they relate
to yeah, like things and moving away from home. Yes, cooking, sewing,
(17:30):
so you could you know, to look at you housers
or whatever or.
Speaker 2 (17:33):
Skit impressive that's at the age of what eleven and
twelve you could do that.
Speaker 5 (17:40):
You know, That's just how I was. It was fantastic,
I mean, and it was a great time. I mean
I was in no way academic at any point of
my school life. Just wasn't into it. Give me sports,
(18:01):
give me other interests, and you had my attention, you know.
Nineteen eighty three when I went into third form, I
was really at sea there for a number of reasons,
what of bullying, that kind of things I didn't take. Luckily,
we went to Australia and I had a year off them,
re entered school in Western Australia and they had the
(18:25):
most incredible sex education lessons. Yeah, that was pretty handy
leaving you know, it was just open, it was it
was all medical terms and well there was no mean
us about it.
Speaker 2 (18:42):
That is actually I think for leaving home that isn't
and I mean probably kids should have those lessons before
they're leaving home Jackie. But Tim's touched on that as well,
but the whole sex education and because you know, it's
one thing to be living at home and parents having
a rough idea where you were are or aren't. But
once you're left home, you really need to know everything
about keeping yourself safe, don't you.
Speaker 3 (19:03):
Yeah, absolutely, And I think education plays a huge role
in that. I think it's both if we can at
home and school. But same happened to media a little
few decades. Slave shift him. Now we did the same thing.
We rotated between sewing and cooking.
Speaker 4 (19:16):
And would work, and you know it is.
Speaker 3 (19:19):
It is fantastic, I think to be able to teach
young young children basic life skills.
Speaker 2 (19:24):
The button sewing thing. Actually, I don't know if I
could now, but I used to. That was one of
the things I think Mum taught me was this is
how you sew on a button.
Speaker 4 (19:36):
And I don't think I have caught on that many times.
Speaker 2 (19:39):
I do not think I ever understood how it worked.
But I poked the needle through the hole and I
looped it through and then broke it off and they
and they stayed on generally, but I still don't think
I know how I did it. It's like one of
those just just do this trust me, keep going and
then just cut it off and away you go.
Speaker 3 (19:58):
And I suppose there are skills that are nice to
have than those that are essential. Right, And so again,
if you're prioritizing the button, sewing's useful, probably know how
I'm just knowing how to sustain yourself and feed yourself,
and you know, keep your sheets clean so you don't
get infections.
Speaker 2 (20:15):
Oh my god, I can't believe I did share that,
but I had to be honest. I mean, I only
did it for one term and the rest I got
back on the I got back on the program. Anyway,
what do you reckon that? What are the top life
skills that every key we kids should know before they
leave home? I think we can look and even the
cooking thing. Here's the thing. I didn't have a clue
(20:37):
about nutrition. I had no idea. So the first time
of my life when I left home Jackie, I put
on weight because I could not walk past the sausages,
chips and gravy. And I had it. I knew that
it was probably not perfect. But if I knew what
I knew about nutrition, I might have just had it
once a week, as opposed to a maide of mine,
(20:58):
we used to go what are you doing? I mean sausages,
chips and gravy, but it wasn't healthy.
Speaker 3 (21:04):
Well, I knowledge growing up with food Pyramid obviously is
what we were taught around nutrition. But you know, when
I think we look at you know, how do we
make this practical for families, because knowing what to feed
your body is really important from you know, not just
an energy perspective, but actually a mental health perspective.
Speaker 4 (21:22):
And we've got a mental health crisis in this country.
So putting good.
Speaker 3 (21:25):
Food in your body helps your mood. And so if
we can support young people to know what quantities or
or what's the balance in their diet, that's really helpful.
And you know this research that you're noting has come
from Hello Fresh. We've got a range of food boxes
that you can get in this country, and I think
being able to have fever systems like that where you've
(21:47):
got recipes where families can come together and learn how
to cook. All the ingredients are there and they have
that kind of info on the recipe. You hope if
you can do that a couple of times a week
or a couple of times a month with your children,
they actually start to soak some of that and it
sits there for when it's needed than their brain.
Speaker 2 (22:06):
It's interesting, yeah, because we ate healthily at home, but
we just ate what Mum cooked, and I don't we
just because it was the New Zealand diet was fairly
it was a sort of fairly standard diet, probably fairly
a fair amount of red meat. But I don't think
I went to university having much of a clue about
fat content, because everyone was like, remember there was a
thing where sugar was the devil, then fat was the deal,
(22:27):
and it was sugar was the devil, and then.
Speaker 3 (22:30):
Was on the accn stant and all their head was
oh godt yes. But again I had some friends at
university that were really knowledgeable about that, but we didn't
talk about that in my family either, tim, but some
people obviously do. I actually imagine again, young people are
more clued up on that ban us because of social media,
(22:50):
and they do seem to have awareness of things greater
than them, perhaps topics we would have looked into, or
facts that we would have known.
Speaker 4 (22:58):
But cooking is an interesting one, isn't it.
Speaker 3 (23:00):
Because when I thought about the power of cooking, my
husband and I just watched the film Netflix recently called Nonnas.
It's a twenty twenty five film and Spawn and it's
about him growing up learning how to cook from his grandmother,
and then when he becomes an adult, he wants to
open a restaurant where Italian honors come and they are
the chefs, so you get like proper Italian nonna food.
Speaker 4 (23:23):
And so.
Speaker 3 (23:25):
I suppose teaching your children life skills isn't just about
the practicalities. It's connection and it's often for people it's
times of love and culture and family history and that
stuff's actually really important for your well being too.
Speaker 2 (23:40):
Yeah right, we'd love to set your course on this.
What do you think the essential skills for kids are
before they leave home? And what did you know as well?
Phil good E?
Speaker 5 (23:50):
Good, how are you all right?
Speaker 2 (23:52):
Thanks?
Speaker 6 (23:53):
Good one? And Jerkie how are you?
Speaker 4 (23:55):
I'm good? Thank you.
Speaker 6 (23:57):
That's excellent. I love for rewards. So I loved your
theory on the sheets. That made me laugh.
Speaker 2 (24:05):
Well, yeah, I mean I did it once and look
those days along gone funny enough, I still remember the
reason I stopped doing that as well. And it's funny
you remember all the people in your life around that time.
But I'm not going to reminisce anymore film.
Speaker 4 (24:18):
They might not be radio appropriate.
Speaker 2 (24:19):
No, no, no, no, let's carry on. For what are
you What did you know when you left home?
Speaker 6 (24:24):
Well, I was going to say, don't worry, I don't judge. Well,
I was going to say, also, I love that point,
Jackie that you said about knowing yourself and your core
values and having an idea of who you are. I
thought that was brilliant, because yeah, you're probably less likely
to make bad decisions. I seen this, I've seen the logic,
and now I thought that was great, A great point
(24:45):
I had. I had absolutely, I learned absolutely, like I
had no skills when I left home, and when I
left school, even though we had economics at intermediate as well,
and we learned to sew and cook and but but
the time I got through high school and that and
left time, i'd forgotten everything and everything done for me
at home too, so I never had to cook her anything,
(25:07):
and so I never took any interest either and asking
mum and that was, you know, when she was cooking.
But I think the two two important things for me
that I think would be great, and you've said them already,
as learning to cook, because I think you go out
and if you've got a basic knowledge of learning how
to cook, not only you're learning how to make yourself
(25:28):
a good, decent, nutritious meal, but you also learn how
to do it cheap as well, so you don't need
to spend a whole unnecessary money, you know, you just, yeah,
you've got a basic idea you can whip up a
nice nutritious meal without him to spend a lot of money.
So I think that's a vital skill. And also learning
to have a bit of budgeting skill as well, so
you know, you learn how to, yeah, pay your bills,
(25:50):
handle your money, but get into some saving habits and
that sort of thing.
Speaker 2 (25:54):
They time to each other, don't they phil Because if
you can't if you can't cook, then you're going to
be eating out and the money is going out the
window straight away, isn't it.
Speaker 6 (26:02):
Yeah, well that's what I was thinking too, because that
was the other thing going to say, like, you're also
going to save yourself money if you're learning to cook
as well. So what you said the budgeting, they tie in.
There's a relationship.
Speaker 2 (26:11):
What skill did you notice? I don't know how I
have to remember that. What skill did you notice? All, hell,
I don't know how to do this. I've been to
learn pretty quickly.
Speaker 6 (26:22):
Well, it was probably the cooking. Probably the cooking was
the one. I was sort of all right with money,
like I had a sort of an ability to be
able to save money or you know, sort of realized
that I had to save money. But yeah, the cooking.
(26:42):
I was really green on the cooking, and it was like, oh,
I'm going to be spending a lot of money on
takeaways because I simply come you know, I didn't know
how to make even a simple meal like a spaghetti bowl,
you know, skiddy bo naise or a macaroni cheese or
because you know, we're and if I did, if I
could cook, I mean I could boil a potato as
they say, you know that I could show that far.
(27:04):
But cooking was the one.
Speaker 4 (27:06):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (27:06):
Yeah, good on your fell actually, Jackie. I mean, it's
an interesting looking at your list. In fact, I'll read
them out. The top ten life skills every key wee
kid should know before they leave home. Knowing yourself. We've
discussed that a little bit. Knowing yourself and what matters
to you, cooking and looking after your body. I mean,
because there's sort of ten points, but they're more like
(27:28):
twenty in a way, aren't they? Cooking and looking m Ramon? Well,
looking out your body, So that's cooking, but also nutrition.
That's knowing how to look out yourself and manage yourself.
Speaker 3 (27:38):
But it's also exercise, it's also sleeping. Well, you know,
all of those factors lead to good physical and mental health.
Speaker 2 (27:46):
Budgeting and managing money, yes important. You find that out
pretty quickly when you suddenly find him got enough money
in you. I wonder how many people learn budgeting really
quickly because they run out of money.
Speaker 3 (27:59):
Well, I definitely didn't learn that at school. But the
rule that was in my family growing up was a
job I got my I was talking to it about
it about a girlfriend about this last night.
Speaker 4 (28:09):
Actually I got my first job.
Speaker 3 (28:11):
I might have been eight or nine, and I used
to press nepkins for the fancy restaurant down the road
and put me on crates, so I'd stand on three
or four crates to reach the pressing machine and I'd
press the neck. And so I had a job from
a really young age. And you know, followed by paper
runs and fish and chip shops and et cetera. And
the rule always in our house was you can spend
(28:32):
half that you have to save half, and I think
you know that. I mean that's budgeting at a very
basic level. But when you get taught there from a
young age, I think that does stick with you, this
idea that you just don't go and splash it.
Speaker 4 (28:43):
You do. You have to be sensible and safe.
Speaker 2 (28:46):
So you've got something here, like and knowing when and
how to ask for help. I mean, these are actually
things they're touching on deeper, totally deeper worries that every
parent has, but actually you don't. I never had that
conversation with mum, probably mum or dad. But yeah, I
mean that's an interesting one. If if you were to
have hit the big outside world and find you're not coping,
(29:07):
would you recognize that? I mean, these are these are
the much bigger, more serious questions that you'd want your
children and.
Speaker 3 (29:14):
The other So, yes, been able to recognize when you're
struggling and know when to ask for help and that
it's okay to the help. But you know the other
big thing I think on there, well, there's a couple
from a psychological perspective, that's important being able to regulate
your mood. So knowing when you're having an emotional feeling
and being able to regulate the unhelpful ones. When you
(29:35):
look at research around mental health and living well, that
is like a critical skill that we never got taught,
really well.
Speaker 4 (29:44):
I did.
Speaker 3 (29:44):
I was raised by a psychologists and a social worker,
but not everybody had not everybody had family star plates
and you know, long conversations at their dinner table. Most
of us, you know, didn't, and so that's really important.
And I think the other one is actually problem solving.
So we live in a world of AI. You want
to look up a recipe, you know, or ask a question.
The facts are there, but can you critically look at
(30:07):
information and can you problem solve? For example, I've spent
all my money, I'm out fletting, I'm living. What am
I going to do about that? Who I need to
ask for help? Or I've got you know, I don't
know twelve dollars left. What's the best way of navigating that?
Actually being able to look at facts and information and
think critically and problem solve. I think it crosses you know,
(30:28):
many areas of skills that are helpful to young people.
Speaker 2 (30:32):
Yeah, actually we need to take a break, but we're
going to come back with some more conversation around this,
but we love your cause. Eight hundred eighty ten and eight.
What are the skills you would want any young person
in your life to leave home with? What would you
want them to know? And what would what would you
sort of be? Well, that's important, but they can learn
that along the way. Give us a call. Eight hundred
(30:54):
eighty ten and eight where with Jackie McGuire and it
is gosh, time is flying. It's twenty to six back
in a mine. Yes, I'm with doctor Jackie McGuire. She's
a clinical psychologist. We're talking about what are the essential
life skills that our kids really need to know before
they head it into the real world. They really need
to know. It's an interesting one, isn't it? Because unless
Jackie that because like you like to think that your
(31:17):
kids are still in touch with you so they can
pick up the phone, so in a way, the things
you really need to know. Sorry, we're going to say
something there.
Speaker 4 (31:25):
I'm like, I've got it.
Speaker 3 (31:26):
I'm thinking of something in the ad break and what
I was thinking about because I've got three girls and
so you know, I think, what would I want them
to fundamentally know? Or think about when they are talking here,
just little sex four and two? Okay, away, I'm in
the grind. I'm just happy if I get a full
night sleep. But I think, yes, I think it is really.
Speaker 4 (31:50):
Important that they can cook and laundry and do their stuff.
Speaker 3 (31:53):
But fundamentally, what do I really want them to know?
I was thinking about things like can they be critically
thinking around whether somebody is a good person? Am I
making a good friend? Is this person I want to
date a good person?
Speaker 4 (32:07):
You know?
Speaker 3 (32:07):
Actually being able to have some level of awareness of
good relationships are back and forward judgments around we take
judgment around people, which comes into that do I know myself?
Critical analysis? Being able to ask for help if things
don't be all right? So you know, I suppose I
sit here with a psychological head on right and there
are absolute practical things for life. But like when I
(32:28):
think about my girls, I want them to be keeping
themselves fake and healthy and well, I think.
Speaker 2 (32:33):
That's and you've touched on something as you were describing that.
I think there are when we think about and the
skills you need to learn to go flatting. It's a
bit like you know, there are things you can teach
your kids in the matter of a few months. You
can say, right, let's learn how to peel a spud,
you know, Crocker.
Speaker 4 (32:47):
Sausage, which is great, great to do that.
Speaker 2 (32:50):
But the stuff that you're talking about is it's it's
it's the stuff that I'm working on my wife and
I would be focused on with our girls right now.
And so it's the lesson that you do not want
them to be learning last minute. You're not going to
teach to them about trust, about making good choices and friendships.
You're not going to teach that. You're not going to
(33:10):
cram that in. And what it does what you've said
as highlights, I guess how important it is about. I
don't want to get all worthy and lectury lecturing should
I say pronunciation, but it does. It's a good reminder
for parents you've got to be present for years and
(33:30):
years before you know, don't leave these things to say
you're crown.
Speaker 3 (33:35):
Whilay the foundations with not the two year old, but
with the four and the six year old all the time,
and there's small micro moments of conversation, right.
Speaker 4 (33:42):
Like was that a good choice? How do you think
you'd you know, it wasn't a good choice. But I'm
going to ask you it it's a cretic way.
Speaker 2 (33:50):
Was it a good choice?
Speaker 4 (33:51):
How do you think you'd feel? Or what is a
good friend, or you know, things that actually, as a
young adult, you know, you think about leaving home and
leaving your security blanket of home.
Speaker 3 (34:00):
If you're somebody that comes from a safe and loving home,
that there is an Unfortunately that's not the case for everyone,
but if you've had a sheltered life, then you're out
there as a young adult.
Speaker 4 (34:12):
Actually, they are the things.
Speaker 3 (34:13):
You need to navigate. Who do I choose to be
in my flat? Like this makes some good choices about
what makes a flatmate? Or you know, when I got
a university, can I determine or if I'm choosing a
trade or a job, what do I want to do.
Speaker 4 (34:25):
Rather than what are my friends doing? Or I think
some of those deeper reflective critical analysis, you know, problem
solving skills are really important.
Speaker 2 (34:35):
Actually, that's an interesting one, even the choosing of flatmates.
I ended up in the flat that I ended up
with because it was connected through I think it was
the guy who I played, who played in the same
sports team as me. He was in a flat and
so he must I think he must have invited me in,
and it was so it was always who you knew,
(34:55):
which sort of looked after that a little bit in
a way. But it's not always quite as similar.
Speaker 4 (35:00):
As how to manage conflict. So I'm pretty pretty sure
that was on the list too, like how do you navigate?
Speaker 2 (35:04):
I didn't get through that.
Speaker 4 (35:06):
Did I put that onto?
Speaker 3 (35:08):
It's also a useful skill, and I'm not thinking that
young people will be pro at this. I mean I
coach people all through their life, you know, seeing your executives,
and there's sixties that haven't nailed that skill. But having
some awareness of okay, you know, if I'm having struggles
with a friend or a partner or a flat mate,
you know, is it you know, if I stick my
head in the scene and avoid that likelihood, it's going
(35:30):
to get worse. So actually one of my ways of
trying to navigate that, like some basic understanding of that,
I think is really helpful for young people.
Speaker 2 (35:38):
I'm just remembering all these I remember getting home flat mart.
He's actually was an okay guy, but he had terrible
taste amusing and he used to blast it up, you know,
to he was probably quite hard to live with but
you just put up with it. But I do remember
getting home one long weekend and I luckily I had
a car. It was an old Dunger of a forty escort.
But literally my other flat mate, one of my other
(36:01):
flat mates and I we literally went away for the
weekend because we got home and thought, I can't do
that this easter. Let's go, let's go there there. But
I guess that's also I don't know what that's the story.
It's just about the fact that flatting is also.
Speaker 3 (36:12):
If you were able to say to him and then
not not in the moment, but the next day or whatever, hey,
totally get that you love your music. Would you mind, like,
can we have a conversation as a flat when we
cut that off on you know, like imagine if you
could have had that conversation.
Speaker 2 (36:28):
Gosh, I can't imagine. I mean it's a long time ago.
By the way, did you say Murray's Bay Intermediate was
that you were one of my callers?
Speaker 4 (36:38):
I was parted to media girl.
Speaker 2 (36:40):
It was just somebody else saying as as said, we
had home ac classes at Murray's Bay Intermediate. Was a
great class actually that they did those kids. It does
kids a favor when they have those sorts of learn
those skills, isn't it.
Speaker 4 (36:53):
I don't know whether they still do, but it'd be
interesting to know. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (36:58):
Another one says, I think you've got to teach some
of the your technically sew on a button. I didn't
teach my son and recently had to sew on a
button on a ceremonial jacket five minutes before presentation. Well, yeah,
I guess So what else have we got, dear tim
and lovely guest.
Speaker 4 (37:17):
Indeed, thank you.
Speaker 2 (37:19):
The greatest skill I learned at home economics was knocking
up a ripper of an omelet. That's from Ryan Sparky. Actually,
I think just having a dishort. How many meals do
you need? A couple?
Speaker 4 (37:32):
Three?
Speaker 2 (37:33):
Three?
Speaker 4 (37:33):
I don't know, not many.
Speaker 2 (37:35):
You know, I should think you should know how to
cook eggs.
Speaker 3 (37:38):
I mean, well, I was about to say a lot
of people. I've heard many a story of people not
knowing how to boil an egg, which careful.
Speaker 2 (37:45):
Well, it's still quite a controversy. Controversy should I say
on that? You know the one? This is the list
that you've knocked up here? Number ten is interesting one
because I think many students who go to university would
probably not do much of this because they make a
pain of the pain in the backside of themselves. In
(38:06):
the communities that arrive in, you've got respecting culture and community,
which I wouldn't say is essential. It's just a nice
to have.
Speaker 3 (38:13):
Oh I see, I think it is essential in terms
of fundamentally, we only flourish if we feel like we belong,
and so we belong in our communities. In part of
living a good life is having purposes wider than yourself.
That's really clear in the research.
Speaker 2 (38:31):
Actually, I'm trying to think. I think I learnt that
through going through leaving home because of who I encountered
in my halls of residence, people from different countries. And
it wasn't that I needed to learn it. How do
I put this? Because but I learned just by virtue
of meeting people from different cultures and getting on with
(38:54):
them that it was sort of it wasn't a prerequisite
for me, but it was having an open mind. I
guess you know what I mean. I'm stumbling with this
because I you know, I came from Roderua. I mean,
I was quite aware of Mari culture and European New
Zealand culture in general, but through you. But when I
went to university I met people from quite different cultures.
(39:18):
I had an Islamic guy who was I didn't really
think anything of it other than he had different beliefs.
Speaker 3 (39:24):
But I think when you get exposed to a wide
range of cultures and you'd take time to know people
rather than view it from afar. But if you get
to know people, I think it makes you less judgmental
and gives.
Speaker 4 (39:36):
You an appreciation wider perhaps than if you don't get
that exposure.
Speaker 2 (39:43):
There possibly a few people listening now though, who are
going out and getting the book Cooking for flatmates. Hey Jackie,
have you are you taking a break over Christmas? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (39:53):
I actually thought I was finished, so you're a little
extra surprise, which was so lovely.
Speaker 2 (40:01):
He's looked at me thought, oh damn, I've got to
go and z be with beverage.
Speaker 3 (40:06):
Well I was at a Christmas party and I've left.
They had a level of done afai. This is not
normal for eight three children at home, just for us.
We're heading to Sunny Nelson.
Speaker 2 (40:15):
Okay, Well, hey jack you really appreciate you coming on
today and we look forward to talking again. Sometime.
Speaker 4 (40:21):
Thank you you too, have a wonderful Christmas.
Speaker 2 (40:23):
Break you too. Bye bye, We'll be back to wrap
things up in just a moment. That's eight minutes to six.
News Talks it Be.
Speaker 1 (40:28):
For more from the weekend collective, listen live to News
Talks it Be weekends from three pm, or follow the
podcast on iHeartRadio
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