November 8, 2024 • 36 mins
Josh Hawley endorsed Cornyn but why? Why is it that swamp creatures like Mitch McConnell and John Cornyn are the ones in leadership? The war inside the democrat party. Being obsessed with food leading to other problems. Would Jesse winning his congressional race changed him?
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:11):
This is a Jesse Kelly show. It is the Jesse
Kelly Show. Let's have some fun on Day Friday. Put
a smile on your face. We are at the end
of what has been a magnificent week and now we
(00:33):
have asked doctor Jesse Friday and we are gonna have
so much fun. Ton I know, guess no calls, but
we have emails, we have voicemails, we have sound you're
making fun of me from my hands. We're gonna talk about, well,
what can we expect, what's realistic, what's not realistic for
the next four years. We'll get to that pretty quickly.
(00:56):
Do I regret losing my congressional races? Did we turned
the tide with this election? We'll talk about that. Let's
have some frank conversations. AG someone wants rond de Santis
in there? Should Blue States block any deportation? What can
we do about that? All that, so much more coming
(01:17):
up tonight on the world famous Jesse Kelly's Show. But
I'm going to begin here with the story I have
told before. Longtime listeners will have heard me. We'll have
heard me tell this story a couple times. But something
happened today in my email inbox is full of people
raging about it, and so I thought I should go
ahead and just lay out a little story. Let's go
(01:39):
behind the scenes. Let's not do this surface level stupid
stuff that everyone does, and let's dig in to the
real game how power works. Let's talk about it. Today,
Josh Holly came out. Senator Josh Holly of Missouri, who
I like very much, came out and he angered apparently
(02:00):
every single person who listens to my show. He came
out and supported John Cornyan for the Leader of the Senate,
John Cornyn, Texas Senator John Cornyn, gun control Cornyn, loser, Cornyn,
continuation of Mitch McConnell, Cornan, if not worse. People hate Cornyn,
(02:20):
understandably so and justifiably so. People like Holly for the
most part. People like Holly. Holly comes from blood red Missouri. Now,
Holly's usually pretty good about blasting away at the left.
Not perfect, course, none of them are. But people woke
up today saw this news and never stunned. My email
in box is full of people raging at Josh Holly
(02:41):
because people, now, especially you who listens to this show,
people understand that our next big fight that is hugely
important is the race to who is going to lead
the GOP in the Senate. That's the race they're in
right now. That's the next fight before Trump get sworn in,
before any of that. That's the next fight, and it's
(03:03):
coming very soon. And we know that. Frankly, the good guys,
we're in a desperate situation. There are three people running, Cornyn, Thoon,
and Rick Scott. Those are the only three running. The
people who listen to this show, you understand that Rick Scott,
(03:24):
far from perfect, is really the only pick that is
not a disaster. If it is John coun John Kuhn,
John Cornyn or John Thune, I mixed them, Chris, John Kuhn,
is it? If it's John Cornyn or John Thune, it's horrible.
Why is it horrible? Again, let's weak out this. It's
horrible because they will be quote bipartisan, they'll do Democrat things,
(03:47):
they'll water down good bills because they're the ultimate swamp rats.
They will make life very, very difficult for anybody we're
trying to get confirmed. If it's Cornyn or it's though,
it's a disaster, a total disaster. And right now that's
how it looks it looks like it will be corn
(04:09):
and earth Thune. Which John Thune.
Speaker 2 (04:12):
This, John Thune, Donald Trump is the Republican nominee.
Speaker 3 (04:16):
Would you support him?
Speaker 1 (04:18):
Well, I'm hoping weand to have other options.
Speaker 3 (04:21):
Yeah, iverted, And the Trump trial could come next week.
Speaker 1 (04:24):
If he's convicted, could you support him? Still, I'm not
We'll see how the trial comes out. I'm not waiting
on that. Senator John Thune, the number two Senate Republican,
warned on Monday that efforts to challenge the electoral college
vote in Congress. Now, yeah, that John Thune. And so
today everyone's angry at Josh Holly, and we're going to
(04:46):
do a little story. I'm gonna make it very brief
because I've told it before, but it's true story, and
it shows you how politics goes. Okay, why would Josh
Holly do this time ago nine? I was freshly out
of the Marine Corps. I was working construction, going to
community college, fully accredited, I should note. And I got very,
(05:10):
very angry about the election of Barack Obama. I knew
what it was going to mean for my country. I
loved my country. I'd never been hugely political, I'd never
run for office. I'd never done any of these things.
I was just a construction guy in the marine, and
that's how my life had been. Decided to run for
US Congress. I throw myself in the race in a
(05:32):
Republican primary. I was in very early. I was running hard,
and I know you're going to find this surprising, but
I was as bout as far to the right as
you could possibly go. I was the same way back
then as I am now. There's no difference. I'm just
balding gray er now, the same way, complete lunatic. That's
how I was back then too. I believe what I believe.
I believe it strongly, and I shouted loudly, and my
(05:56):
race was going very well. And then eventually the establishment
throws in in a GOP. The race starts to look
more winnable because it was going to be a tea
party year, said the GOP establishment. They throw in some
popular guy from the state legislature to run against me
in the primary. Good dude, he's a really good dude.
I should note, good dude. I was just texting with
(06:17):
him the other day, so we're friends. So don't go
look him up and blast him. I like him a lot,
but he was much more he was more middle of
the road than I was. And they threw all the
money behind him, and I crushed him, blew him out
in the primary. I won the primary by like seven points,
just murdered him. It was going to be a year
for someone like me anyway, a far right guy. Well,
the establishment was so angry that I had crushed their guy.
(06:41):
They denied me any kind of GOP funding for the
general election for weeks, three weeks after I won the primary. Well,
without that kind of a money, especially as a newbie,
you're not gonna have enough money to compete with Democrat money.
Gabrielle Gifford, she was my opponent, she was on TV
just crucifying me. Was that three weeks was a re
I lost the election. I lost by four thousand votes.
(07:02):
I wasn't even on television. She just killed me in
that three weeks. So we're desperate. We're desperate, and I
mean desperate. We need to raise money. No one's helping.
Where is everybody? And incomes a man who hated me
and I hated him, John McCain. I had endorsed his
primary opponent against him. I know I was insane. I
(07:23):
was saying, like I said, the same way back then
as now, I just don't care. But he hated me.
He knew about that. He hated me, and I hated him.
We ended up having a meeting in his office in DC.
I'd heard he wanted to see me. I just figured
we were gonna yell at each other, but he asked
me some questions. He got to know the marine side
of me, and he was in there cussing like the
old sailor he was. And personally, he decided during that meeting,
(07:48):
I like this freaking guy. He's low, insane, and he's
far to the right, but I like this guy. And
he puts out the bat signal, Hey we're gonna help him,
and he John McCain and turned on the light switch
of money, and money flooded into my campaign flooded, and
we would go to the post office every day. There'd
(08:09):
just be huge checks from people I'd never talked to before.
I didn't even know this world existed. And all of
a sudden, we have money for TV commercials, and we're
on TV, and we come all the way back and
we almost win. Like I said, they had to recount
the vote. It took them a week to recount it
because the vote was so close, almost won. I was
almost in Congress. Could you imagine, right, I was almost
in Congress. Now, let me ask you, what if what
(08:34):
if I'd won, And what if instead of being in
the Senate, let's say John McCain was a very powerful
person in the House of Representatives. What if I had
won that race? And I come back to Washington, d C.
And one of the first things that happens to me,
I'm moving my boxes and my fresh ice maker into
my congressional office. And one of the first things that
(08:54):
happened is knock on my congressional door and Sean McCain
and he says, Hey, Jesse, congratulations on the win. That's huge. Hey,
I'm not going to ask you to vote for things
that you don't want to vote for. But I have
this leadership fight coming up. I would like to be
(09:15):
the Speaker of the House, and I want to know
if I can count on your vote to make me
Speaker of the House. I know what you're saying. The
little thing inside of you is saying the same thing.
The little thing inside of me is saying, no, you can't.
You have to do the right thing. I agree, that's
(09:37):
what we want to happen. But here in the real world,
how do you say no to that if you're sitting
there and he's not asking you to screw the people
over on a vote or something, because the answer would
always be noted that no matter what, he's not asking
you to raise taxes or open the border or do
(09:58):
anything like that. He's asking for your support for a
leadership position. And you know, as you sit there, beyond
a shadow of a doubt, you wouldn't be sitting there
without his help. You don't have to email me, you
don't have to. You can just ask yourself, how could
(10:22):
you say no? Could you say no? Why? How could
Josh Holly support John Cornyan. You're going to ask that
question of a lot of people in the coming days,
and when we come back, I'll show you how. Hang
on feeling a little stocky, Follow like and subscribe on
social at Jesse Kelly's show. It is the Jesse Kelly
(10:47):
Show on Today Friday, and ask doctor Jesse Friday and
I will get to those ask doctor Jesse questions in
a minute. We'll make fun of the Democrats as they
are scrambling in the wake of this disastrous election for them.
In fact, they're even being asked about their rhetoric versus reality.
Oh it is so good. There's so much to get to.
(11:08):
But just to finish up my point, Josh Holly made
it apparently every single person who listens to my show
angry today by endorsing for Senate leader, the worthless, worthless
piece of human trash, John Cornyn. And people are asking
why why why Joshi? I like Holly? What happened? Why? Why? Why?
Why why? I just told you my story about donations
made to me back in the day. Josh Holly just
(11:32):
won re election on Tuesday night, handily. Missouri is I
love Missouri. Missouri is so freaking red now it's like
the red estate in the Union. I don't know how
that happened, but it's amazing. So he won. He won handily.
But Jewish producer Chris did a little bit of digging
for me on my request. Would you look at that,
(11:53):
I've found the largest contributor to Josh Holly's campaign. Wow,
six hundred and twenty three thousand dollars. Dang, that's a lot.
Hold on, let me see who oh, John Cornyan. That
(12:16):
is how it works, and that's exactly why. I should
note because I've had people email in since I've been
ranting about this, because it does matter. I've had people
email in. Jesse, I don't understand why Rick Scott is
so behind. Because he is behind, he's not expected to win.
In fact, he's probably gonna come in third. Jesse. Why
is Rick Scott not in first? He's the better one.
(12:37):
He's the better one, Jesse. Why is Rick Scott? Because
John Cornyan and John Thune, this is the problem with
GOP leadership in the House and Senate, and we're going
this is a problem. It's going to take a long
time to tackle. The swampier you are And what do
I mean by swampy? Okay, let's stop using terms like that.
Let's break this down in ways we can all understand.
(12:59):
If I walk in to wash in DC and I'm
Congressman Jesse Kelly, Let's say I had won the race,
and I have dreams of being in GOP leadership. Maybe
I want to have a Head of the Judiciary or
Ways and Means, or maybe even Speaker of the House.
We'll make it Speaker of the House. The big boy.
I want to be Speaker of the House. One day
I'm new Congressman Kelly. How do I get from A
(13:20):
to B? How do I get from freshman congressman to
one day being Speaker of the House. Well, to be
Speaker of the House, I need the votes of the
other people in my conference. I realized the whole Congress
votes on it. But really, what do I need? I
need Republican votes. Well, I have Republicans of every stripe
all around me, far far righty's like me, squishy losers
(13:42):
like Don Bacon. I have people all around me. How
do I gather up all these votes? Do I bring
them extra cheese balls, maybe a cup of fresh ice.
That's not how you gather votes. You gather these votes
by helping your fellow Republicans keep power, because once you
get into power, you want to stay in power. That
(14:02):
is human nature. Well, how do they keep power? They
keep power by winning reelection. How do you win reelection?
You raise money? I give them money. I raise them money. Okay, Well,
how does that explain becoming swampy? Well, go look at
the large contributors to political campaigns. If I'm new Congressman
(14:29):
Jesse Kelly wanting to be Speaker of the House one
day and let's say a huge defense contractor who walks in.
The defense contractor, by the way, I should note, who
wants the continuation of this disastrous war in Ukraine to
go on forever. If he walks into my office and says, hey, Jesse,
(14:52):
I really, really really need you to send another one
hundred billion dollars to Ukraine. I have a lot of missiles.
The government's buying them from me. It's hugely lucrative to me.
I need you to agree. I need you to sign
on and say yes on this new bill one hundred
billion dollars to Ukraine. And I say back to him,
why would I do that? I don't like this whole thing.
(15:14):
And he says, well, there is the matter of the
million dollars we can put in your congressional pack. A
million dollars you can spread around to other people who
need those favors, who will remember those favors. That's how
it works. I see. Look, why are Republicans, some of
(15:37):
them so squishy on the border exact same thing, Hey, Jesse,
we we want you to vote on some amnesty. I
don't want to vote on any amnesty. I don't believe
in amnesty for anybody. Really yeah, I know. But you see,
we have a bunch of guys who own hotels in
various retail places, and they bank on this illegal labor
keeping the costs down, and they've con true be a
(16:00):
bunch of money to us, and we want to pass
that along. How about another ten million dollars for your
congressional campaign if you sign on for amnesty. How's that sound, Jesse?
You see what I mean. The swampier you get, the
more money you take in. Right, it's not always the case,
but it's mostly the case. The swampier you get, the
(16:20):
easier it is to bring in money. In general, there
are two ways. As a senator or a house member,
there are two ways to become somebody who raises a
bunch of money. You either a become a complete swamp
rat like I just described, or b you have to
become some sort of a media star in the conservative sphere.
(16:43):
Think about like Michelle Bachman. Remember Michelle Bachman back in
the day. She was this cute congresswoman from Minnesota, always
throwing bombs out there, got super popular, and you can
raise a lot of money online like that. That's the
only other way. If you don't do one of those
two things. You never raise money, you don't get to
spread money. You don't gain power, you don't get into leadership.
(17:05):
That's how it works. I know that's not how you
want it to work. It's not how I want it
to work, but that's how it works. All right, all right,
let's move. I'll do some questions show we mister patriotic profit,
I just wanted to thank you for getting me on
a chalk regimen last month. I've been chugging such a
massive volume of liberal tears since the MAGA mandate that
it would probably have overdosed on estrogen if it wasn't
(17:28):
for the massive testosterone boost. In all seriousness, thanks for
the great advice on maximizing my manliness and on navigating
our crazy political landscape. I'm telling you, man, you don't
need to take my word for it on chalk. I
don't want you to. In fact, I'm going to ask
you something. If you get a Chalk subscription, I want
(17:49):
you to promise me you will cancel your subscription after
three months. If you don't feel better, I'm asking you
to cancel it. That's how amazing this stuff is. Could
read emails for three hours of people thanking me. When
you start a male vitality stack or a female vitality stack,
your energy alone will have you knowing it's worth it.
(18:10):
You will know probably in less than three months. It
was about a month for me and I knew c
hoq dot com promo code Jesse, We'll be back. It
is the Jesse Kelly Show, playing all of Chris's favorite
songs here on a Friday, and ask doctor Jesse Friday
and reminding you you can email the show Jesse at
(18:34):
Jesse kellyshow dot com. I'm in such a freaking good mood.
Nothing can bring me down right now. I'm in just
a great mood. In fact, you want to feel better
before we get to the ask doctor Jesse questions. I
swear I'm gonna get to him in a minute. Watching
Democrats try to put things together here, it's hilarious to
(18:54):
me because there is a war right now going on
within the Democrat party, and I think I know who's
gonna win, but I don't know for sure. The war
is between those and there are some believe it or not,
Pelosi's actually one of these ones, the wars between those
who know they've gotten way too looney, way too ridiculous.
(19:18):
It's turned so many people off. You can't win as
a Democrat nationally if you're losing half the union workers.
That doesn't it doesn't work. It does not work at all.
The Pelosi types know that that's a good point. Chris
Nancy Pelosi was the one trying to stop Trump's impeachment
because she knew how it would make them look. So
(19:39):
those types, they're trying to slow down the communist menace.
The problem is sometimes it just comes down to age.
And we don't like discussing this, but age matters, meaning
the older Democrats like Pelosi are understand what it takes
(20:01):
to keep the coalition together. But the younger ones, the
ones who will still be alive in twenty years, they
are rapidly communists and they don't have any intention at
moderating at all. And to watch them twist themselves into
knots about what to do, what shouldn't they do? Listen
(20:26):
to this current diversity, hire God.
Speaker 4 (20:27):
Asked us, Donald Trump has no greater friend than the
far left, which has managed to alienate historic numbers of
Latino's Blacks, Asians and Jews from the Democratic Party with
absurdities like.
Speaker 5 (20:38):
Deep on the police or from the evagency or LATINX
is the is the administration, the campaign, the Democratic Party
looking at the pandemic as the cause rather than is
that easier.
Speaker 1 (20:52):
To liliting in the mirror.
Speaker 3 (20:53):
So let's step back here.
Speaker 1 (20:55):
I think I've been in the president and the vice president.
You've heard the question. These even the reporters are asking, Hey,
you defund the police. That sounds great on Berkeley's campus.
You're gonna get a lot of cheers for that at
some cocktail party in Napa Valley with all your rich
(21:16):
communist friends who are never going to encounter that crime.
That sounds great. But when you go into poor neighborhoods,
blue collar neighborhoods, you know what, defund the police sounds
like you sound like a nutball. What are you gonna
do about it? Okay, So there's that end of it.
Some of them know, how are you gonna stop? And
then there's the other side of it that is just
(21:40):
amazing to me. This is Van Jones on CNN. These people,
they can't here how much they sound like every communist
who has ever lived, Every single communist in power who
has ever been in power, has answered his unpopularity with
(22:02):
controlling the media, controlling the narrative, control it, more control,
more censorship. I'm unpopular because they're allowed to say this,
and they're allowed to say that. This was Van Jones
on Sanda.
Speaker 3 (22:15):
There are legal protections that allow these companies to do
what they want you and do what they will. I
think in a normal country we would say, oh, last second,
maybe we need to have a different set of regulations
for social media platforms down at this thing, and maybe
we need to have less money in the system. But
that conversation is not happening yet.
Speaker 1 (22:33):
Why social media, why are they so upset with that? Well?
Why do you know the truth about so many different things?
How many stories could I go through right now? The
Russian collusion, to George Floyd, to the COVID stuff, let's
modernize it to the election we just had. Did Donald
Trump threaten Liz Cheney or any of those things? How
(22:57):
many stories do you know the truth of solely because
you have the freedom to seek out alternate sources of information? Well,
it's every story, every single story. The only reason you
know the truth is you go look, you go find it.
You're you're on different media sites, you listen to the
(23:19):
show you're on social media. There's a bunch of different
ways now for you to access information. They can't stand that.
If the only way for you to access information was
the traditional media sources, you would believe Donald Trump threatened
to shoot Liz Cheney. Think about that, how crazy it is,
(23:39):
and they can't stand it. They can't stand it. And
then there's this these people. They can't see how rabid
they've become and how they are the ones so responsible
for the crushing of their.
Speaker 2 (23:55):
Base, particularly the media ecosystem they've it's not a good one.
It's a radicalization funnel. But what they have done in
their online media ecosystem is build a radicalization engine, literally
the way militant groups do around the world.
Speaker 1 (24:10):
That literally takes.
Speaker 2 (24:12):
People from relatively low level annoyances with the world. Wire
eggs so expensive, Why is my kid learning this new
thing in American history in school that I didn't learn,
and then moves them through YouTube videos, through podcasts, moves
them from that annoyance all the way slowly, slowly, slowly
to a full blown fascist politics. It's an elaborate, multi
(24:34):
billion dollar infrastructure, and there is nothing like it on
the pro democracy side. We don't have an when a
man is just lost and lonely and not yet radicalized.
We don't have the equivalent of Joe Rogan and Jordan
Peterson to move that man in a feminist direction.
Speaker 1 (24:53):
We don't have the freedom to move the man in
a feminist direction. Let's dwell on that for one again.
I want to explain this to all the everyone. Every
normal person listening will know this, But to you communists
who hate listen. Everyone hates feminists and they always will.
(25:14):
If you are a feminist, everyone hates you and they
always will until you stop being a feminist. This is
not me being mean. I'm delivering you the truth that
you are a bitter, divisive person and it comes out
of you, and therefore you're very unpleasant to be around,
and so nobody wants to be around you. Even other
(25:37):
feminists hate hanging out with feminists. So you're not going
to move people towards feminism. That's one two to my
larger point, we don't have a Joe Rogan. Joe Rogan
has been a Democrat for as long as I've been alive.
He supported Bernie Sanders, he was vocally anti Trump for
the longest time. The reason you quote don't have Joe
(26:00):
Rogan anymore, as you rabbit animals, couldn't stop yourself from
your demonic impulses, and you pushed him over into Donald
Trump's camp. You're the reason you don't have Joe Rogan.
But they can't see it. They can't see it, all right.
I didn't think I was ever going to say this,
but I believe I possibly I possibly sexually harassed somebody
(26:24):
by accident today, and I will explain exactly what I
mean by that in a moment. Does this somebody need
to purchase a burn A Pistol launcher? It probably? I
just got this email, Jesse. I was at my family
reunion and my wife's burn A Pistol Launcher Lee edition arrived.
I quickly tried to coax my cousins to let me
shoot one of them so we could test it. I
didn't get any takers. I finally handed it to one
(26:47):
of them and said I would do it. Oh, no, don't.
I don't even want to read the rest of this.
At forty five feet it proved to be accurate, striking
me below my left shoulder blade. It put a hole
in the vest I was wearing, and I attached a picture.
Oh he did of the wound it left. Tell your
listeners they don't need to test it. I did. It
(27:07):
will stop a threat. His name is Lyle. Please do
not test the burn a pistol launcher on yourself. Please
the thing. It will hurt your clothes, It will hurt
you badly. It will not kill you, by the grace
of God. But it is designed to stop a threat.
It's non lethal pepper balls or tear gas balls or
kinetic rounds. It will stop a very bad man so
(27:29):
you can escape. And it's legal in all fifty states.
You don't need a permit, you don't need a background check.
Save your life or the life of someone you love.
Get him a burn a Pistol launcher. They have great
products for women. B y Rna Berna dot com. Slash
Jesse my harassment story. Next it is the Jesse Kelly
(27:52):
Show on a Friday, and asked doctor Jesse Friday, and yes,
the questions are about to begin. I just have to
tell you the story about me. I believe I inadvertently
sexually harassed somebody today and it wasn't what I wanted.
So I'm just going to lay out exactly exactly what happened. First,
a little background. Longtime listeners of the show will know
(28:15):
this to be true. I have what my wife calls
an unhealthy obsession with food. I do. It's not healthy.
You don't want to be like me. Food affects my
mood a great deal. If I have a great meal,
I will be in a good mood for hours, and
if I have a bad one, it will drag me
(28:36):
down for hours. It's ridiculous, ridiculous and childish. It's terrible.
I know I am obsessed with food. My father rest
in peace. I got it from him. He could tell
you when he was alive, every town he's ever been in,
he could tell you the restaurant he went to and
what he ate if it was good. He could You
could ask my dad, Hey, Dad, when's the last time
(28:59):
you went to Boise?
Speaker 2 (29:01):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (29:01):
I went to Boise and I went down to Tina's
diner shop and you got to get the chicken Fried's sake.
That's how he was, and so that's how I got it,
and I inherited it. Honestly, it was just was it.
Last week my wife and I decided to get out
of the house have a little date night. The World
series was on, and we went to a place where
we could sit at the bar. And we sat at
the bar like a couple of teenagers. We were watching
(29:23):
the game, just eating. You're having a good time. And
dude beside me gets this pepperoni jalapeno flatbread that looked dynamite,
and Aurey looks over at me because she was in
between me and him, and she said, please tell me
you're not eyeballing his food. And I got so that's
how it is. She said, stop eyeballing everyone's food. I'll
(29:43):
talk to people about their food. So that's how I
get about food. Now today Carol Roth, you know Carol Roth,
she's coming on. I was recording a segment with her
for my TV show. I have a TV show every
night on the first TV. And how it works is
I'm sitting there in the chair, I'm doing my monologue,
and then when it's time to interview them, the producers
(30:05):
and all these people dial them up, and there's a
little monitor in front of me, so I can see
when she's been hooked in, but oftentimes I'm not looking
at it. In fact, while they were dialing up Carol Roth,
I was getting hungry. We were about done recording. I
was going to order some food for me and Chris
(30:25):
and Corey, and so I pull up my phone. I'm
looking down right, if you're looking at the simulcast, I'm
looking down just like I am. Now. I'm looking down
at my phone, so I'm not looking at the monitor
while the producers are dialing up Carol Roth. And I'm
looking and I see this taco place and I click
on it. It's a new taco place, so I'm ooh boom,
(30:46):
and I click on it. And the first thing I
see is this big, meaty, cheesy looking burrito thing of
some kind, and it had some kind of sauce slash
salsak pouring out of the top of it. I'm staring
down at my phone, and remember, everyone can hear me.
The producers can hear me if the guest is wired,
(31:07):
and they can hear me. By now, I'm staring down
at my phone, and I said, oh, hello, beautiful Carol
Roth had been on the line for like twenty seconds
by now, just waiting for me to say something to
do with calms chick. Now, by the grace of God,
Carol one knows me. She's a personal friend, and two
(31:29):
she can see me on the monitor. She knew I
was looking down at my phone talking to something whatsoever.
And that's when the producer was Matt, my TV producer.
Matt said, Hey, Jesse, Carol's on the line. I hope
she doesn't think you were talking to her. And I'm like, oh, hi, Carol, Sorry,
it was the tacos. I swear it was the tacos.
So yeah, absolutely sexually harassed Carol Roth today by accident,
(31:53):
and that might be a lawsuit. Chris, What what Chris?
If you could have seen this, Oh my gosh, this
food looked really really good. Really, what you mean why
didn't we get that? Well, here's why. I was in
a little bit of a hurry, and I knew you
were going to be high maintenance about it in some way,
and I knew we'd have Corey chiming in. I can't
(32:14):
have any onions in mine, and it was just gonna
like it was YouTube, We're gonna ruin it. You two
are the reason we didn't get that. You two are
the reason we didn't get nice things. I was getting
ready to dive in, but because of both of you,
that's the reason we didn't so own it. If you're
looking for who to blame. I've got a mirror right
over there in my office. That's where you need to
go find it. Now, before we get back into the
(32:37):
ask doctor Jesse questions, I should say into the ask
doctor Jesse questions, because we actually haven't answered any of
those yet. That's going to be my fault. Let's talk
about your dog really quickly. Your dog dies too early.
Our dogs here in America die before they should. They
die because they never get nutrition. We give them dog
(32:59):
food their whole lives, and then they die at ten
years old, and we look around wondering why there's no
nutrition in dog food. It's dead. They kill everything in
it at the factory. They have to spray it down
with lard to even get your dog to eat it.
Otherwise it's so dead even dogs won't eat it. Start
sprinkling rough Greens on it, and your dog will live
(33:20):
healthier and longer. Rough Greens is an all natural nutritional
supplement that has everything your dog needs. It doesn't matter
how big your dog is. Oh and it's for cats, well,
I should say they have a cat version of it.
They have a cat blend, they have a dog blend.
They have dog chews, very healthy chews. A lot of
those chewy things you buy your dog, they're full of
(33:40):
a bunch of garbage. You don't want your dog to have.
Rough Greens free jumpstart trial bags are available at eight
three three three three My Dog, or you can go
to Roughgreens dot com slash Jesse. All right, let's do
some questions, shall wese? Little hands? Kelly not nice as
(34:02):
an oracle? Have you ever laid awake at night and
wondered what your life would have been like today if
you had won a race and became a politician. Would
you be the same dude you are today? Well, I
have wondered, you know, you wonder which way it would go.
But I will tell you. I'll tell you this. My
(34:26):
faith leaves me without regrets when it comes to that stuff.
The things I regret in life are the things that
I have done wrong. And I've done many, many, many
things wrong that I wish I could take back things.
I'm responsible for things that I did wrong. But I
don't have regrets about horrible, horrible things I've gone through,
or even bad things that have happened, or or losing
(34:48):
congressional races. I'm losing my father right. I don't. I don't.
I don't have this this feeling of regret about it.
I'm sad and I miss him a lot, but I
trust that that's what God wanted. I lost a congressional race,
and I wasn't supposed to win a congressional race, and
(35:09):
I have no idea what I was maybe protected from.
Maybe I would have gotten corrupted. I don't know, how
do I know. I'm a flawed man. Maybe I would
have got bribed. Maybe some little dime intern would have
started batting her eyes at me, and I've blown up
my personal life. Maybe forget about me. Maybe I would
(35:31):
have done something wrong to someone else. Maybe i'd been
Maybe if I had been elected, it would have denied
someone else of something they needed for me at another time.
Maybe it was about my sons. You know, it was
tough being in Congress with young kids, and I love
being there for my boys and everything they do. I
would no, I really don't. Obviously I had wished i'd
(35:53):
won at the time bad I was running for the
right reasons, and it hurt, but I don't question it.
That's the way life goes. That's the way life goes,
and that's the way we're supposed to go, all right,
what can we actually expect over the next four years,
What should we expect, what's not reasonable, what is let's
(36:13):
talk about that next
This is a Jesse Kelly show. It is the Jesse
Kelly Show. Let's have some fun on Day Friday. Put
a smile on your face. We are at the end
of what has been a magnificent week and now we
(00:33):
have asked doctor Jesse Friday and we are gonna have
so much fun. Ton I know, guess no calls, but
we have emails, we have voicemails, we have sound you're
making fun of me from my hands. We're gonna talk about, well,
what can we expect, what's realistic, what's not realistic for
the next four years. We'll get to that pretty quickly.
(00:56):
Do I regret losing my congressional races? Did we turned
the tide with this election? We'll talk about that. Let's
have some frank conversations. AG someone wants rond de Santis
in there? Should Blue States block any deportation? What can
we do about that? All that, so much more coming
(01:17):
up tonight on the world famous Jesse Kelly's Show. But
I'm going to begin here with the story I have
told before. Longtime listeners will have heard me. We'll have
heard me tell this story a couple times. But something
happened today in my email inbox is full of people
raging about it, and so I thought I should go
ahead and just lay out a little story. Let's go
(01:39):
behind the scenes. Let's not do this surface level stupid
stuff that everyone does, and let's dig in to the
real game how power works. Let's talk about it. Today,
Josh Holly came out. Senator Josh Holly of Missouri, who
I like very much, came out and he angered apparently
(02:00):
every single person who listens to my show. He came
out and supported John Cornyan for the Leader of the Senate,
John Cornyn, Texas Senator John Cornyn, gun control Cornyn, loser, Cornyn,
continuation of Mitch McConnell, Cornan, if not worse. People hate Cornyn,
(02:20):
understandably so and justifiably so. People like Holly for the
most part. People like Holly. Holly comes from blood red Missouri. Now,
Holly's usually pretty good about blasting away at the left.
Not perfect, course, none of them are. But people woke
up today saw this news and never stunned. My email
in box is full of people raging at Josh Holly
(02:41):
because people, now, especially you who listens to this show,
people understand that our next big fight that is hugely
important is the race to who is going to lead
the GOP in the Senate. That's the race they're in
right now. That's the next fight before Trump get sworn in,
before any of that. That's the next fight, and it's
(03:03):
coming very soon. And we know that. Frankly, the good guys,
we're in a desperate situation. There are three people running, Cornyn, Thoon,
and Rick Scott. Those are the only three running. The
people who listen to this show, you understand that Rick Scott,
(03:24):
far from perfect, is really the only pick that is
not a disaster. If it is John coun John Kuhn,
John Cornyn or John Thune, I mixed them, Chris, John Kuhn,
is it? If it's John Cornyn or John Thune, it's horrible.
Why is it horrible? Again, let's weak out this. It's
horrible because they will be quote bipartisan, they'll do Democrat things,
(03:47):
they'll water down good bills because they're the ultimate swamp rats.
They will make life very, very difficult for anybody we're
trying to get confirmed. If it's Cornyn or it's though,
it's a disaster, a total disaster. And right now that's
how it looks it looks like it will be corn
(04:09):
and earth Thune. Which John Thune.
Speaker 2 (04:12):
This, John Thune, Donald Trump is the Republican nominee.
Speaker 3 (04:16):
Would you support him?
Speaker 1 (04:18):
Well, I'm hoping weand to have other options.
Speaker 3 (04:21):
Yeah, iverted, And the Trump trial could come next week.
Speaker 1 (04:24):
If he's convicted, could you support him? Still, I'm not
We'll see how the trial comes out. I'm not waiting
on that. Senator John Thune, the number two Senate Republican,
warned on Monday that efforts to challenge the electoral college
vote in Congress. Now, yeah, that John Thune. And so
today everyone's angry at Josh Holly, and we're going to
(04:46):
do a little story. I'm gonna make it very brief
because I've told it before, but it's true story, and
it shows you how politics goes. Okay, why would Josh
Holly do this time ago nine? I was freshly out
of the Marine Corps. I was working construction, going to
community college, fully accredited, I should note. And I got very,
(05:10):
very angry about the election of Barack Obama. I knew
what it was going to mean for my country. I
loved my country. I'd never been hugely political, I'd never
run for office. I'd never done any of these things.
I was just a construction guy in the marine, and
that's how my life had been. Decided to run for
US Congress. I throw myself in the race in a
(05:32):
Republican primary. I was in very early. I was running hard,
and I know you're going to find this surprising, but
I was as bout as far to the right as
you could possibly go. I was the same way back
then as I am now. There's no difference. I'm just
balding gray er now, the same way, complete lunatic. That's
how I was back then too. I believe what I believe.
I believe it strongly, and I shouted loudly, and my
(05:56):
race was going very well. And then eventually the establishment
throws in in a GOP. The race starts to look
more winnable because it was going to be a tea
party year, said the GOP establishment. They throw in some
popular guy from the state legislature to run against me
in the primary. Good dude, he's a really good dude.
I should note, good dude. I was just texting with
(06:17):
him the other day, so we're friends. So don't go
look him up and blast him. I like him a lot,
but he was much more he was more middle of
the road than I was. And they threw all the
money behind him, and I crushed him, blew him out
in the primary. I won the primary by like seven points,
just murdered him. It was going to be a year
for someone like me anyway, a far right guy. Well,
the establishment was so angry that I had crushed their guy.
(06:41):
They denied me any kind of GOP funding for the
general election for weeks, three weeks after I won the primary. Well,
without that kind of a money, especially as a newbie,
you're not gonna have enough money to compete with Democrat money.
Gabrielle Gifford, she was my opponent, she was on TV
just crucifying me. Was that three weeks was a re
I lost the election. I lost by four thousand votes.
(07:02):
I wasn't even on television. She just killed me in
that three weeks. So we're desperate. We're desperate, and I
mean desperate. We need to raise money. No one's helping.
Where is everybody? And incomes a man who hated me
and I hated him, John McCain. I had endorsed his
primary opponent against him. I know I was insane. I
(07:23):
was saying, like I said, the same way back then
as now, I just don't care. But he hated me.
He knew about that. He hated me, and I hated him.
We ended up having a meeting in his office in DC.
I'd heard he wanted to see me. I just figured
we were gonna yell at each other, but he asked
me some questions. He got to know the marine side
of me, and he was in there cussing like the
old sailor he was. And personally, he decided during that meeting,
(07:48):
I like this freaking guy. He's low, insane, and he's
far to the right, but I like this guy. And
he puts out the bat signal, Hey we're gonna help him,
and he John McCain and turned on the light switch
of money, and money flooded into my campaign flooded, and
we would go to the post office every day. There'd
(08:09):
just be huge checks from people I'd never talked to before.
I didn't even know this world existed. And all of
a sudden, we have money for TV commercials, and we're
on TV, and we come all the way back and
we almost win. Like I said, they had to recount
the vote. It took them a week to recount it
because the vote was so close, almost won. I was
almost in Congress. Could you imagine, right, I was almost
in Congress. Now, let me ask you, what if what
(08:34):
if I'd won, And what if instead of being in
the Senate, let's say John McCain was a very powerful
person in the House of Representatives. What if I had
won that race? And I come back to Washington, d C.
And one of the first things that happens to me,
I'm moving my boxes and my fresh ice maker into
my congressional office. And one of the first things that
(08:54):
happened is knock on my congressional door and Sean McCain
and he says, Hey, Jesse, congratulations on the win. That's huge. Hey,
I'm not going to ask you to vote for things
that you don't want to vote for. But I have
this leadership fight coming up. I would like to be
(09:15):
the Speaker of the House, and I want to know
if I can count on your vote to make me
Speaker of the House. I know what you're saying. The
little thing inside of you is saying the same thing.
The little thing inside of me is saying, no, you can't.
You have to do the right thing. I agree, that's
(09:37):
what we want to happen. But here in the real world,
how do you say no to that if you're sitting
there and he's not asking you to screw the people
over on a vote or something, because the answer would
always be noted that no matter what, he's not asking
you to raise taxes or open the border or do
(09:58):
anything like that. He's asking for your support for a
leadership position. And you know, as you sit there, beyond
a shadow of a doubt, you wouldn't be sitting there
without his help. You don't have to email me, you
don't have to. You can just ask yourself, how could
(10:22):
you say no? Could you say no? Why? How could
Josh Holly support John Cornyan. You're going to ask that
question of a lot of people in the coming days,
and when we come back, I'll show you how. Hang
on feeling a little stocky, Follow like and subscribe on
social at Jesse Kelly's show. It is the Jesse Kelly
(10:47):
Show on Today Friday, and ask doctor Jesse Friday and
I will get to those ask doctor Jesse questions in
a minute. We'll make fun of the Democrats as they
are scrambling in the wake of this disastrous election for them.
In fact, they're even being asked about their rhetoric versus reality.
Oh it is so good. There's so much to get to.
(11:08):
But just to finish up my point, Josh Holly made
it apparently every single person who listens to my show
angry today by endorsing for Senate leader, the worthless, worthless
piece of human trash, John Cornyn. And people are asking
why why why Joshi? I like Holly? What happened? Why? Why? Why?
Why why? I just told you my story about donations
made to me back in the day. Josh Holly just
(11:32):
won re election on Tuesday night, handily. Missouri is I
love Missouri. Missouri is so freaking red now it's like
the red estate in the Union. I don't know how
that happened, but it's amazing. So he won. He won handily.
But Jewish producer Chris did a little bit of digging
for me on my request. Would you look at that,
(11:53):
I've found the largest contributor to Josh Holly's campaign. Wow,
six hundred and twenty three thousand dollars. Dang, that's a lot.
Hold on, let me see who oh, John Cornyan. That
(12:16):
is how it works, and that's exactly why. I should
note because I've had people email in since I've been
ranting about this, because it does matter. I've had people
email in. Jesse, I don't understand why Rick Scott is
so behind. Because he is behind, he's not expected to win.
In fact, he's probably gonna come in third. Jesse. Why
is Rick Scott not in first? He's the better one.
(12:37):
He's the better one, Jesse. Why is Rick Scott? Because
John Cornyan and John Thune, this is the problem with
GOP leadership in the House and Senate, and we're going
this is a problem. It's going to take a long
time to tackle. The swampier you are And what do
I mean by swampy? Okay, let's stop using terms like that.
Let's break this down in ways we can all understand.
(12:59):
If I walk in to wash in DC and I'm
Congressman Jesse Kelly, Let's say I had won the race,
and I have dreams of being in GOP leadership. Maybe
I want to have a Head of the Judiciary or
Ways and Means, or maybe even Speaker of the House.
We'll make it Speaker of the House. The big boy.
I want to be Speaker of the House. One day
I'm new Congressman Kelly. How do I get from A
(13:20):
to B? How do I get from freshman congressman to
one day being Speaker of the House. Well, to be
Speaker of the House, I need the votes of the
other people in my conference. I realized the whole Congress
votes on it. But really, what do I need? I
need Republican votes. Well, I have Republicans of every stripe
all around me, far far righty's like me, squishy losers
(13:42):
like Don Bacon. I have people all around me. How
do I gather up all these votes? Do I bring
them extra cheese balls, maybe a cup of fresh ice.
That's not how you gather votes. You gather these votes
by helping your fellow Republicans keep power, because once you
get into power, you want to stay in power. That
(14:02):
is human nature. Well, how do they keep power? They
keep power by winning reelection. How do you win reelection?
You raise money? I give them money. I raise them money. Okay, Well,
how does that explain becoming swampy? Well, go look at
the large contributors to political campaigns. If I'm new Congressman
(14:29):
Jesse Kelly wanting to be Speaker of the House one
day and let's say a huge defense contractor who walks in.
The defense contractor, by the way, I should note, who
wants the continuation of this disastrous war in Ukraine to
go on forever. If he walks into my office and says, hey, Jesse,
(14:52):
I really, really really need you to send another one
hundred billion dollars to Ukraine. I have a lot of missiles.
The government's buying them from me. It's hugely lucrative to me.
I need you to agree. I need you to sign
on and say yes on this new bill one hundred
billion dollars to Ukraine. And I say back to him,
why would I do that? I don't like this whole thing.
(15:14):
And he says, well, there is the matter of the
million dollars we can put in your congressional pack. A
million dollars you can spread around to other people who
need those favors, who will remember those favors. That's how
it works. I see. Look, why are Republicans, some of
(15:37):
them so squishy on the border exact same thing, Hey, Jesse,
we we want you to vote on some amnesty. I
don't want to vote on any amnesty. I don't believe
in amnesty for anybody. Really yeah, I know. But you see,
we have a bunch of guys who own hotels in
various retail places, and they bank on this illegal labor
keeping the costs down, and they've con true be a
(16:00):
bunch of money to us, and we want to pass
that along. How about another ten million dollars for your
congressional campaign if you sign on for amnesty. How's that sound, Jesse?
You see what I mean. The swampier you get, the
more money you take in. Right, it's not always the case,
but it's mostly the case. The swampier you get, the
(16:20):
easier it is to bring in money. In general, there
are two ways. As a senator or a house member,
there are two ways to become somebody who raises a
bunch of money. You either a become a complete swamp
rat like I just described, or b you have to
become some sort of a media star in the conservative sphere.
(16:43):
Think about like Michelle Bachman. Remember Michelle Bachman back in
the day. She was this cute congresswoman from Minnesota, always
throwing bombs out there, got super popular, and you can
raise a lot of money online like that. That's the
only other way. If you don't do one of those
two things. You never raise money, you don't get to
spread money. You don't gain power, you don't get into leadership.
(17:05):
That's how it works. I know that's not how you
want it to work. It's not how I want it
to work, but that's how it works. All right, all right,
let's move. I'll do some questions show we mister patriotic profit,
I just wanted to thank you for getting me on
a chalk regimen last month. I've been chugging such a
massive volume of liberal tears since the MAGA mandate that
it would probably have overdosed on estrogen if it wasn't
(17:28):
for the massive testosterone boost. In all seriousness, thanks for
the great advice on maximizing my manliness and on navigating
our crazy political landscape. I'm telling you, man, you don't
need to take my word for it on chalk. I
don't want you to. In fact, I'm going to ask
you something. If you get a Chalk subscription, I want
(17:49):
you to promise me you will cancel your subscription after
three months. If you don't feel better, I'm asking you
to cancel it. That's how amazing this stuff is. Could
read emails for three hours of people thanking me. When
you start a male vitality stack or a female vitality stack,
your energy alone will have you knowing it's worth it.
(18:10):
You will know probably in less than three months. It
was about a month for me and I knew c
hoq dot com promo code Jesse, We'll be back. It
is the Jesse Kelly Show, playing all of Chris's favorite
songs here on a Friday, and ask doctor Jesse Friday
and reminding you you can email the show Jesse at
(18:34):
Jesse kellyshow dot com. I'm in such a freaking good mood.
Nothing can bring me down right now. I'm in just
a great mood. In fact, you want to feel better
before we get to the ask doctor Jesse questions. I
swear I'm gonna get to him in a minute. Watching
Democrats try to put things together here, it's hilarious to
(18:54):
me because there is a war right now going on
within the Democrat party, and I think I know who's
gonna win, but I don't know for sure. The war
is between those and there are some believe it or not,
Pelosi's actually one of these ones, the wars between those
who know they've gotten way too looney, way too ridiculous.
(19:18):
It's turned so many people off. You can't win as
a Democrat nationally if you're losing half the union workers.
That doesn't it doesn't work. It does not work at all.
The Pelosi types know that that's a good point. Chris
Nancy Pelosi was the one trying to stop Trump's impeachment
because she knew how it would make them look. So
(19:39):
those types, they're trying to slow down the communist menace.
The problem is sometimes it just comes down to age.
And we don't like discussing this, but age matters, meaning
the older Democrats like Pelosi are understand what it takes
(20:01):
to keep the coalition together. But the younger ones, the
ones who will still be alive in twenty years, they
are rapidly communists and they don't have any intention at
moderating at all. And to watch them twist themselves into
knots about what to do, what shouldn't they do? Listen
(20:26):
to this current diversity, hire God.
Speaker 4 (20:27):
Asked us, Donald Trump has no greater friend than the
far left, which has managed to alienate historic numbers of
Latino's Blacks, Asians and Jews from the Democratic Party with
absurdities like.
Speaker 5 (20:38):
Deep on the police or from the evagency or LATINX
is the is the administration, the campaign, the Democratic Party
looking at the pandemic as the cause rather than is
that easier.
Speaker 1 (20:52):
To liliting in the mirror.
Speaker 3 (20:53):
So let's step back here.
Speaker 1 (20:55):
I think I've been in the president and the vice president.
You've heard the question. These even the reporters are asking, Hey,
you defund the police. That sounds great on Berkeley's campus.
You're gonna get a lot of cheers for that at
some cocktail party in Napa Valley with all your rich
(21:16):
communist friends who are never going to encounter that crime.
That sounds great. But when you go into poor neighborhoods,
blue collar neighborhoods, you know what, defund the police sounds
like you sound like a nutball. What are you gonna
do about it? Okay, So there's that end of it.
Some of them know, how are you gonna stop? And
then there's the other side of it that is just
(21:40):
amazing to me. This is Van Jones on CNN. These people,
they can't here how much they sound like every communist
who has ever lived, Every single communist in power who
has ever been in power, has answered his unpopularity with
(22:02):
controlling the media, controlling the narrative, control it, more control,
more censorship. I'm unpopular because they're allowed to say this,
and they're allowed to say that. This was Van Jones
on Sanda.
Speaker 3 (22:15):
There are legal protections that allow these companies to do
what they want you and do what they will. I
think in a normal country we would say, oh, last second,
maybe we need to have a different set of regulations
for social media platforms down at this thing, and maybe
we need to have less money in the system. But
that conversation is not happening yet.
Speaker 1 (22:33):
Why social media, why are they so upset with that? Well?
Why do you know the truth about so many different things?
How many stories could I go through right now? The
Russian collusion, to George Floyd, to the COVID stuff, let's
modernize it to the election we just had. Did Donald
Trump threaten Liz Cheney or any of those things? How
(22:57):
many stories do you know the truth of solely because
you have the freedom to seek out alternate sources of information? Well,
it's every story, every single story. The only reason you
know the truth is you go look, you go find it.
You're you're on different media sites, you listen to the
(23:19):
show you're on social media. There's a bunch of different
ways now for you to access information. They can't stand that.
If the only way for you to access information was
the traditional media sources, you would believe Donald Trump threatened
to shoot Liz Cheney. Think about that, how crazy it is,
(23:39):
and they can't stand it. They can't stand it. And
then there's this these people. They can't see how rabid
they've become and how they are the ones so responsible
for the crushing of their.
Speaker 2 (23:55):
Base, particularly the media ecosystem they've it's not a good one.
It's a radicalization funnel. But what they have done in
their online media ecosystem is build a radicalization engine, literally
the way militant groups do around the world.
Speaker 1 (24:10):
That literally takes.
Speaker 2 (24:12):
People from relatively low level annoyances with the world. Wire
eggs so expensive, Why is my kid learning this new
thing in American history in school that I didn't learn,
and then moves them through YouTube videos, through podcasts, moves
them from that annoyance all the way slowly, slowly, slowly
to a full blown fascist politics. It's an elaborate, multi
(24:34):
billion dollar infrastructure, and there is nothing like it on
the pro democracy side. We don't have an when a
man is just lost and lonely and not yet radicalized.
We don't have the equivalent of Joe Rogan and Jordan
Peterson to move that man in a feminist direction.
Speaker 1 (24:53):
We don't have the freedom to move the man in
a feminist direction. Let's dwell on that for one again.
I want to explain this to all the everyone. Every
normal person listening will know this, But to you communists
who hate listen. Everyone hates feminists and they always will.
(25:14):
If you are a feminist, everyone hates you and they
always will until you stop being a feminist. This is
not me being mean. I'm delivering you the truth that
you are a bitter, divisive person and it comes out
of you, and therefore you're very unpleasant to be around,
and so nobody wants to be around you. Even other
(25:37):
feminists hate hanging out with feminists. So you're not going
to move people towards feminism. That's one two to my
larger point, we don't have a Joe Rogan. Joe Rogan
has been a Democrat for as long as I've been alive.
He supported Bernie Sanders, he was vocally anti Trump for
the longest time. The reason you quote don't have Joe
(26:00):
Rogan anymore, as you rabbit animals, couldn't stop yourself from
your demonic impulses, and you pushed him over into Donald
Trump's camp. You're the reason you don't have Joe Rogan.
But they can't see it. They can't see it, all right.
I didn't think I was ever going to say this,
but I believe I possibly I possibly sexually harassed somebody
(26:24):
by accident today, and I will explain exactly what I
mean by that in a moment. Does this somebody need
to purchase a burn A Pistol launcher? It probably? I
just got this email, Jesse. I was at my family
reunion and my wife's burn A Pistol Launcher Lee edition arrived.
I quickly tried to coax my cousins to let me
shoot one of them so we could test it. I
didn't get any takers. I finally handed it to one
(26:47):
of them and said I would do it. Oh, no, don't.
I don't even want to read the rest of this.
At forty five feet it proved to be accurate, striking
me below my left shoulder blade. It put a hole
in the vest I was wearing, and I attached a picture.
Oh he did of the wound it left. Tell your
listeners they don't need to test it. I did. It
(27:07):
will stop a threat. His name is Lyle. Please do
not test the burn a pistol launcher on yourself. Please
the thing. It will hurt your clothes, It will hurt
you badly. It will not kill you, by the grace
of God. But it is designed to stop a threat.
It's non lethal pepper balls or tear gas balls or
kinetic rounds. It will stop a very bad man so
(27:29):
you can escape. And it's legal in all fifty states.
You don't need a permit, you don't need a background check.
Save your life or the life of someone you love.
Get him a burn a Pistol launcher. They have great
products for women. B y Rna Berna dot com. Slash
Jesse my harassment story. Next it is the Jesse Kelly
(27:52):
Show on a Friday, and asked doctor Jesse Friday, and yes,
the questions are about to begin. I just have to
tell you the story about me. I believe I inadvertently
sexually harassed somebody today and it wasn't what I wanted.
So I'm just going to lay out exactly exactly what happened. First,
a little background. Longtime listeners of the show will know
(28:15):
this to be true. I have what my wife calls
an unhealthy obsession with food. I do. It's not healthy.
You don't want to be like me. Food affects my
mood a great deal. If I have a great meal,
I will be in a good mood for hours, and
if I have a bad one, it will drag me
(28:36):
down for hours. It's ridiculous, ridiculous and childish. It's terrible.
I know I am obsessed with food. My father rest
in peace. I got it from him. He could tell
you when he was alive, every town he's ever been in,
he could tell you the restaurant he went to and
what he ate if it was good. He could You
could ask my dad, Hey, Dad, when's the last time
(28:59):
you went to Boise?
Speaker 2 (29:01):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (29:01):
I went to Boise and I went down to Tina's
diner shop and you got to get the chicken Fried's sake.
That's how he was, and so that's how I got it,
and I inherited it. Honestly, it was just was it.
Last week my wife and I decided to get out
of the house have a little date night. The World
series was on, and we went to a place where
we could sit at the bar. And we sat at
the bar like a couple of teenagers. We were watching
(29:23):
the game, just eating. You're having a good time. And
dude beside me gets this pepperoni jalapeno flatbread that looked dynamite,
and Aurey looks over at me because she was in
between me and him, and she said, please tell me
you're not eyeballing his food. And I got so that's
how it is. She said, stop eyeballing everyone's food. I'll
(29:43):
talk to people about their food. So that's how I
get about food. Now today Carol Roth, you know Carol Roth,
she's coming on. I was recording a segment with her
for my TV show. I have a TV show every
night on the first TV. And how it works is
I'm sitting there in the chair, I'm doing my monologue,
and then when it's time to interview them, the producers
(30:05):
and all these people dial them up, and there's a
little monitor in front of me, so I can see
when she's been hooked in, but oftentimes I'm not looking
at it. In fact, while they were dialing up Carol Roth,
I was getting hungry. We were about done recording. I
was going to order some food for me and Chris
(30:25):
and Corey, and so I pull up my phone. I'm
looking down right, if you're looking at the simulcast, I'm
looking down just like I am. Now. I'm looking down
at my phone, so I'm not looking at the monitor
while the producers are dialing up Carol Roth. And I'm
looking and I see this taco place and I click
on it. It's a new taco place, so I'm ooh boom,
(30:46):
and I click on it. And the first thing I
see is this big, meaty, cheesy looking burrito thing of
some kind, and it had some kind of sauce slash
salsak pouring out of the top of it. I'm staring
down at my phone, and remember, everyone can hear me.
The producers can hear me if the guest is wired,
(31:07):
and they can hear me. By now, I'm staring down
at my phone, and I said, oh, hello, beautiful Carol
Roth had been on the line for like twenty seconds
by now, just waiting for me to say something to
do with calms chick. Now, by the grace of God,
Carol one knows me. She's a personal friend, and two
(31:29):
she can see me on the monitor. She knew I
was looking down at my phone talking to something whatsoever.
And that's when the producer was Matt, my TV producer.
Matt said, Hey, Jesse, Carol's on the line. I hope
she doesn't think you were talking to her. And I'm like, oh, hi, Carol, Sorry,
it was the tacos. I swear it was the tacos.
So yeah, absolutely sexually harassed Carol Roth today by accident,
(31:53):
and that might be a lawsuit. Chris, What what Chris?
If you could have seen this, Oh my gosh, this
food looked really really good. Really, what you mean why
didn't we get that? Well, here's why. I was in
a little bit of a hurry, and I knew you
were going to be high maintenance about it in some way,
and I knew we'd have Corey chiming in. I can't
(32:14):
have any onions in mine, and it was just gonna
like it was YouTube, We're gonna ruin it. You two
are the reason we didn't get that. You two are
the reason we didn't get nice things. I was getting
ready to dive in, but because of both of you,
that's the reason we didn't so own it. If you're
looking for who to blame. I've got a mirror right
over there in my office. That's where you need to
go find it. Now, before we get back into the
(32:37):
ask doctor Jesse questions, I should say into the ask
doctor Jesse questions, because we actually haven't answered any of
those yet. That's going to be my fault. Let's talk
about your dog really quickly. Your dog dies too early.
Our dogs here in America die before they should. They
die because they never get nutrition. We give them dog
(32:59):
food their whole lives, and then they die at ten
years old, and we look around wondering why there's no
nutrition in dog food. It's dead. They kill everything in
it at the factory. They have to spray it down
with lard to even get your dog to eat it.
Otherwise it's so dead even dogs won't eat it. Start
sprinkling rough Greens on it, and your dog will live
(33:20):
healthier and longer. Rough Greens is an all natural nutritional
supplement that has everything your dog needs. It doesn't matter
how big your dog is. Oh and it's for cats, well,
I should say they have a cat version of it.
They have a cat blend, they have a dog blend.
They have dog chews, very healthy chews. A lot of
those chewy things you buy your dog, they're full of
(33:40):
a bunch of garbage. You don't want your dog to have.
Rough Greens free jumpstart trial bags are available at eight
three three three three My Dog, or you can go
to Roughgreens dot com slash Jesse. All right, let's do
some questions, shall wese? Little hands? Kelly not nice as
(34:02):
an oracle? Have you ever laid awake at night and
wondered what your life would have been like today if
you had won a race and became a politician. Would
you be the same dude you are today? Well, I
have wondered, you know, you wonder which way it would go.
But I will tell you. I'll tell you this. My
(34:26):
faith leaves me without regrets when it comes to that stuff.
The things I regret in life are the things that
I have done wrong. And I've done many, many, many
things wrong that I wish I could take back things.
I'm responsible for things that I did wrong. But I
don't have regrets about horrible, horrible things I've gone through,
or even bad things that have happened, or or losing
(34:48):
congressional races. I'm losing my father right. I don't. I don't.
I don't have this this feeling of regret about it.
I'm sad and I miss him a lot, but I
trust that that's what God wanted. I lost a congressional race,
and I wasn't supposed to win a congressional race, and
(35:09):
I have no idea what I was maybe protected from.
Maybe I would have gotten corrupted. I don't know, how
do I know. I'm a flawed man. Maybe I would
have got bribed. Maybe some little dime intern would have
started batting her eyes at me, and I've blown up
my personal life. Maybe forget about me. Maybe I would
(35:31):
have done something wrong to someone else. Maybe i'd been
Maybe if I had been elected, it would have denied
someone else of something they needed for me at another time.
Maybe it was about my sons. You know, it was
tough being in Congress with young kids, and I love
being there for my boys and everything they do. I
would no, I really don't. Obviously I had wished i'd
(35:53):
won at the time bad I was running for the
right reasons, and it hurt, but I don't question it.
That's the way life goes. That's the way life goes,
and that's the way we're supposed to go, all right,
what can we actually expect over the next four years,
What should we expect, what's not reasonable, what is let's
(36:13):
talk about that next
Host
Jesse Kelly
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