November 22, 2024 • 38 mins
What 4 years of Democrat leadership looks like under Biden and his dementia addled mind. The blame falls on the voters. They see themselves as the vanguard of the system. Gaming veterans’ benefits. The best toppings for a burger.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:11):
This is a Jesse Kelly show. It is the Jesse
Kelly Show. Another hour of the Jesse Kelly Show on
a Friday, and ask doctor Jesse. Friday, we're gonna discuss
this Russia, North Korea, America thing veterans cheating on disability payments.
In fact, I'll probably open with that. Someone wants to
(00:32):
talk about burger toppings, all that and so much more
coming up on the world famous Jesse Kellys Show. All right,
I'm gonna begin with this one here, Jesse, what do
you think about VA disability payments? My youngest brother was
a marine and living in Maryland. I know a lot
of military people, many of whom received disability payments despite
working lucrative jobs and making well over six figures. They
(00:56):
aren't missing limbs and eyes, et cetera. I know one
man who's considered one hundred percent disabled and he receives
a hefty check. Plus he doesn't pay property taxes because
his hearing was affected. I'm all for paying disabled vets,
but if you're in one piece and can make two
hundred k at a civilian job, are you the person
that needs that money or could it be better allocated
(01:17):
to gold Star families. Okay, I'm not going to say
her name, but let's just be honest about this. There
are a lot of veterans, a lot of them who
cheat on this disability stuff. They pretend to be disfigured
and disabled to get free money from the government. And
I personally know some guys I was in the Marines
(01:40):
with when we were getting out. You know, when you
get out, they work you over medically and they hand
you your medical file and they teach you, hey, this
apply for disability if you're injured or something like that.
But people know how to gain the system and work
the system and lie about that things. And friends of
(02:03):
mine who were not disabled and were not disfigured, they
worked this and worked that and they would get disability
and it was a nice check, and they would come
try to convince me to do it. Hey, Kelly, you
got to do this. Hey it's easy. Hey it's free money. Hey,
(02:23):
you got to do this. And I don't steal. If
I was disabled or disfigured in some way, yes, I
would do it. And if you are a vet, that
is that go get your money. You go get your money.
You fought for your country. If you gave up pieces
of yourself for your country. You go get paid for that,
(02:45):
and anyone else not saying I'm judging you because I'm not.
I do not take what is not mine. I do
not claim to be a moral person or a good person.
I am immoral. I am not a good person at all.
But I do not steal, and for me, that's thievery.
And I could not bring myself to steal from my
(03:08):
country because I had served my country. Could not do it.
It's very very very very very common. It's something people
don't talk about a lot. And the reason people don't
talk about it is Americans love their veterans. It's just
we have a heart for veterans, and I'm glad we do.
You should. It's really the mark of a good society
(03:29):
that we love and appreciate our veterans. And people don't
want to criticize them. They don't want to ever bring
this up because it sounds like you're blasting away at veterans.
But because I don't care about offending people, I'm more
than happy to bring it up. It's wrong. I will
not do it. I refuse to do it. And it's
very very very common, very very common. Jesse I'm wondering
(03:53):
why Russia can use Iran or North Korea drones and
rackets into Ukraine, but the Ukraine can't use US or
other countries rackets. I think he means rockets. I think
he said, oh, why can Russia? I don't even know
what you're saying, buddy, that's not very good English. You
need to spell check that. That was terrible.
Speaker 2 (04:12):
Hey, uncle Jesse, you ever think about adding some flair
to your wardrobe. I'm talking white gloves like Michael Jackson
to accentuate your enormous hands. Hey man, my real question
is what's going on in Pennsylvania here about Casey hasn't
yet completed. Is McCormick's Senate position in jeopardy. I hear
they're counting the legal ballots or something like that. What's
(04:33):
going on?
Speaker 1 (04:34):
Well, Casey conceded, Casey finally conceded, and we still have
a very broken election system in this country in blue areas,
and they broke it on purpose. To have votes still
being counted a week, two weeks after an election is
an international embarrassment. It's an embarrassment. Oh, I don't understand
(04:57):
why this is. It's not complicated at all. Democrats want
to cheat in elections because Democrats are communists who only
care about power. There's no moral founding whatsoever. Therefore, they
will put into place as many rules and laws and
procedures as many as humanly possible, in order to muddy
the waters and ensure that they will at least be
(05:20):
able to cheat. It is not an accident that every
single location where it takes forever to count the votes
is a location that is controlled by Democrats. It's not
an accident. Democrats campaign nationally that you shouldn't even have
to show ID to vote, since everyone can get an ID.
There's only one reason you wouldn't want people to show ID.
(05:42):
That's because you intend to cheat in elections. There's a
reason they tried to pass HR one right after the
election of Joe Biden. Hr one nationalized elections and it
ensured all mail in ballots for everywhere for all time.
Why would you do something insane because mail in ballots
are where the most cheating happens. Now, just like I
(06:04):
told you before the election, the most suicidal, insane, dumbest
idea I've ever heard is this idea you get from
people on the right when they say every election stolen.
Remember how I used to yell at you about that
every election stolen. It's stupid, it's insane, it's a lie,
and we just proved it's not true at all. Every
(06:26):
election isn't stolen. Stop with that idiocy. But some are stolen.
Many are stolen. We are getting better, and credit to
the RNC. I can't believe I'm saying that, but they
really did a great job. We are getting better at
sniffing it out, lawyering it up, luring up and stopping
it before it starts. The RNC they stopped a lot
(06:52):
of dirty stuff during that election. We still have a
long way to go. It's just really dirty, man. These
people were really dirty. Oh, speaking of dirty, Sonny Hasted
on the View once again had to read a legal
note because she keeps lying. The best thing the Right
ever did was start suing these media organizations, suing the
(07:14):
daylights off of them, because now they can't just tell
whatever lie they want. They always have to add the
legal notes to avoid getting setle.
Speaker 3 (07:23):
Note, I have a legal note. Matt Gates has long
denied all allegations and has not been charged with any crime.
Gates previously dismissed allegations that he paid for sex, saying
that quote, someone is trying to recategorize my generosity to
ex girlfriends as something more than toward. Another legal note,
Pete Hegseth's lawyer said he paid the woman in twenty
(07:43):
twenty three to head off the threat of a basis lawsuit.
He has denied any wrongdoing. Just call the show legal
note from now on.
Speaker 1 (07:53):
They're so angry. They get so angry they have to
make these legal notes. Now why, Because communists lie at
all times, you cannot possibly be honest about their demonic
religion of destruction when you think about it. I was
thinking about this last night. I had some peace and
quiet because I've left the room. I was singing about this.
(08:17):
Think about the presidential campaign. Kamala Harris just ran It
was all a brazen lie about every position she's ever taken.
They were running ads talking about how strong they were
on the border when they opened up the border on purpose.
These people lie about the positions they take at all times.
In fact, there was a poll. I should dig this up,
(08:37):
but it doesn't matter. You could go look it up yourself.
There was this crazy poll that came out where somebody
was calling voters, not you, not the informed. They were
calling normies and they were telling them Democrat positions, and
the normies said the polster was lying because no Democrat,
(08:59):
nobody would act, actually take those positions. And the positions
were things like transing kids behind the back of parents.
The actual Democrat position was so insane that normies didn't
believe that was an actual position they had. They just
lie about everything. And again, I'll hand it to NPR,
(09:19):
why do you do that.
Speaker 4 (09:20):
I think our reverence for the truth might become might
have become a bit of a distraction that is preventing
us from finding consensus and getting important things done.
Speaker 1 (09:30):
Well, gosh, this truth. We're trying to get things done.
I don't have time to tell the truth. If I
tell the truth, then our revolution is going to fail.
Our revolution involves destroying everything, and so we have to
lie otherwise people will catch on to that fact. They
lie about everything at all times. Do you know do
(09:54):
you know how many Democrats would be mortified if they
knew what they actually believed, if they found out what
Democrats actually did and believed. I can't tell you how
many people email this show and they'll say something to
the effect of Jesse. My dad is this lifelong Democrat,
and I told him they opened up the border on purpose,
(10:15):
and he said, that's not true. It's obviously true. Like
I said, they're bringing them in as fast as possible.
But if you are a Democrat, it is a religion
to you and always has been a religion to you.
And if someone was to pull that thread enough, then
it's not that your political party would crumble. Your entire
(10:38):
worldview crumbles if you find out you've been lied to.
So instead they just stay in the lies. And I'm
just so loving these legal notes. It's hilarious to me.
I also love chalk because it makes me full of energy.
These vitality stacks, they have male ones and female ones,
natural herbal supplements. They're so good for your energy. And
(10:59):
it's not that. It's not that caffeine energy where your
hands are shaky and sweaty. It's nothing like that at all.
You just feel great. I'll get home from work at night, right,
I'll get home from work at night and sometimes I'll
work out. That's how good I feel. I'm just full
of pep and energy, and I have chalk to thank
(11:19):
for that. Take advantage of the black Friday special and
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(11:42):
your tea levels in ninety days without sticking a needle
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you going to feel like in a year? Chalk dot
com promo code Jesse. Burger Top in Russia. Next The
Jesse Kelly Show I Like It returns. Next it is
(12:07):
the Jesse Kelly Show on a Friday. Reminding you you
can email the show Jesse at jessekellyshow dot com. We
are having a blast as we always do on a Friday, Jesse.
I need your thoughts on the proper burger setup, specifically
add ons. My family and I went to our favorite
(12:27):
burger place last week. My oldest and I tried something
new by adding a layer of cream cheese to our
standard double with American cheese. We were not even. We
were not overwhelmed, not even whelmed. Do do you the burgermeister,
have a topping limit? I'm starting to think condiments should
(12:47):
be the only thing you put on cheeseburgers, other than
maybe pickles. At some point, toppings take away from the burger.
What say you? All right? So we're obviously not talking
about my world famous Jesse Kelly bergers because they don't
need any toppings at all, no condiments. Don't you dare
put veggies on it. We're not going to talk about
(13:09):
me and the fact that I already came up with
the perfect recipe. Let's talk about you and your inferior
burgers whatever, whether you're making them or purchasing them somewhere. Yes,
there have to be topping limits, you know you want
to keep. Back when I was running for Congress in Arizona,
(13:31):
there was a guy, a congressman, Pete Sessions. He's still
around on what he's doing now, but Pete Sessions was
a congressman back then. He was a big shot and
he came out to raise money. He helped me raise
money try to run for Congress. And Pete Sessions loved
everywhere I went with him. He gave the same speech
to people, and he would talk about keeping the big
deal the big deal, meaning talk about big issues on
(13:55):
the election. Don't find yourself wading through the minutia. Take
the big things people care about. Keep it a big deal.
Like you saw the campaign Trump just ran, he did
very well. What did he talk about the entire time? Inflation? Immigration, inflation, immigration, inflation, immigration,
very few side roads from inflation, immigration. He kept the
big deal, the big deal. It's what people cared about.
(14:18):
It's what he talked about. This all comes back to
your cheeseburger. A cheeseburger, it's designed to put delicious meat
with melty cheese on it. It's designed to deliver those
two things into your mouth. Those are the stars of
the show. When you start throwing all this other crap
(14:43):
on your berry, you haven't had my peanut butter and
jelly bacon burger. You're right, I haven't because my cheeseburger
doesn't need peanut butter and jelly. Acceptable additions to a
burger are, by the way, not pickles. Either you pickle
people or crazy. Now hold on, Corey, let me explain.
Let me explain. I'm not anti pickle. Okay, I like
(15:05):
pickles as much as the next man. I wish I
could take that back, but you understand what I'm saying.
I'll eat a pickle. I'm fine if the wife has
some deal pickles at home, sometimes she gets some from
the store. All comala down a deal pickle, I'm I'm
fine with it. When you put a pickle on a burger,
it takes away from the big deal, the meat, the
(15:27):
cheese that the pickle like grabs you. It's all you
can taste is the pickle. The only acceptable additions to
a burger are things that in a way compliment compliment
the meat in the cheese. Ketchup is okay. I personally
don't eat ketchup on a burger much, but I'll get them.
(15:47):
You know, McDonald's puts ketchup on a burger, I'll grab
a Micde's burger. I don't take it off. Ketchup's fine,
Mustard's fine, Mayo's fine adds a little tang on there.
Stop it, Chris, There's nothing wrong with that. Mayo's Fine.
Onions can be fine on a burger. Fried jalapinos if
you find a place that has fried alipinos or jalapino strips.
(16:10):
I was talking to Chris yesterday, dairy queen used to
do that. They might still do that, but we used
to get a dairy queen for burgers, and they'll they'll
do that. Yeah, Chris and egg. You know what. You
know why a fried egg works on a burger because
it doesn't come in and try to take over. It
knows it's not the star of the show. It's a
bit player. You want you need bit players, right, it's
(16:30):
a role player. If you're in the NBA, you need
a guy who's gonna be able to play defense and rebound.
Not everyone gets to score thirty points a game. That's
what the fried egg is. It knows its role. Its
job is to be there, add some yolk, compliment the
meat in the cheese flavors. This is the role of
the egg. Where people go nuts is they start picking
(16:52):
every little thing I need. Let us honey, tomatoes, We
need extra pickles on this? Should I get eight thousand onions?
Then we need ketchup mustard and may and then let's
add some hot sauce to it. It didn't need any of that.
You know what Lima beans needs that. The wife was
trying to get us all to eat broccoli a couple
days ago. Because she's always trying to be healthy and
things like that. She was trying to get us all
(17:13):
to get to eat broccoli. So she did what many
people do and made this big broccoli casserole, and she
threw so much crep in there. It was just cheese
and crumbs and whatever. You know what broccoli casserole is.
Everyone's seen broccoli castrole And yeah it was still gross,
but that wasn't her fault. She knew broccoli is disgusting,
(17:35):
it's foul, it's barely even edible, And so I have
to throw a bunch of great things in there because
broccoli needs help. Broccoli is special needs. The cheeseburger is
a genius. The broccoli needs an extra tutor, a helping
(17:57):
hand because it's disgusting. A cheeseburger doesn't need any of
those things. Think about broccoli as if it's Chris. Me.
I'm the cheeseburger. Chris doesn't mean he's look doesn't mean
he's a bad person. This needs a lot of help me.
(18:18):
I can basically do it all on my own. Does
that explain it? I hope that explained it perfectly, at
least in a way I understood it. Chris doesn't seem
to see it my way. But that's beside the point
you need to give to Tunnel to Towers. It's Christmas
season and Tunnel to Towers they're special all twelve months
of the year, but in Christmas season it's really really
(18:40):
extra special. These families who have lost a father, a mother,
fallen first responder families, gold Star families, they get presented
with homes. This season. They're building smart homes for catastrophically
injured veterans. I lost my leg. I can't do this.
I'm missing my arms. Tunnel to Towers is the organization
(19:01):
that's helping, and unlike a lot of quote veterans organizations,
they do more than just talk about it. They have
more than just a fancy label. More than ninety five
cents of every dollar goes directly to its programs. In
the nonprofit world. That's unheard of. Eleven bucks a month
is all they asked for. Sign up to give it automatically,
(19:23):
you'll never know it's gone. T the number two T
dot org t twot dot org. All right, Ukraine and
Russia and Joe Biden, we will talk about that next.
Is it possible to bribe me, of course it is.
We'll discuss that and more.
Speaker 5 (19:42):
Hang on the Jesse Kelly Show.
Speaker 1 (19:46):
It is the Jesse Kelly Show on a Friday, and
ask doctor Jesse Friday. Oh no, my hat, I forgot
my hat there it is. I'm learning this sweet hat today.
It's kind of like one of these floppy old school hats.
I don't know what they're called. Jewish producer Chris has
not been very nice about it. Corey was a lot
more supportive, and I appreciate that. It's obviously jealousy. We
(20:08):
all know what that is. El Hefe of the Little Hands.
Why on earth is a man known to be mentally
impaired being allowed to give Ukraine permission to escalate their
attacks into Russia. His name is Kevin. Why is this
guy calling the twenty twenty four NBA Champions of Balls.
(20:28):
You're Suldy right, Well, let's just be honest about this. Obviously,
Joe Biden isn't making this call. Joe Biden hasn't made
any calls for four years. The swamp is making all
the calls for him, all the little Obama communists he
put around him, like Susan Rice and Victoria Nunez and
Lilisa Monico's and these people, these are the ones who
(20:50):
are just setting policy for the United States of America.
They're the ones deciding the who's who and the what's what.
But all that aside, why is this allowed? Why is
this allowed? Elections have consequences. I honestly, I know, we
just want a big election, and so everyone just kind
of wants to move on and forget about that. But
(21:14):
we just had four years of Joe Biden and cheating
aside from twenty to twenty, which they very obviously did,
but cheating aside. Roughly half the country went out and
voted for a cadaver and he was obviously a cadaverous.
It was obvious to anyone who cared enough about their
country to pay attention that he was not a functional adult.
(21:38):
And now this country has had to endure four years
of this child sitting in the White House drooling on himself.
And it is not outside of the realm of possibility
that that decision to put him in the White House
will cause World War III. And that's what happens when
(21:58):
you elect Democrats. And there are so many people who
are so mind warped in this country they can't help,
but vote for these people over and over and over again.
Elections have consequences. You heard me ranting about Michigan. They're
going through this too. Michigan was a red state in
twenty sixteen, and then they had this witch governor, Gretchen
(22:21):
Whitmer locked them down. Michigan was locked down like New
York was locked down. Michigan was locked down like California
was locked down. They didn't let people buy gardening seeds
in the grocery store. And after years of that, the
people of Michigan, because Roe versus Wade had been overturned,
they went to the voting booth and they didn't vote
(22:44):
to throw out the tyrant who locked down their gardening seeds.
They voted because they loved abortion so much. And now
businesses are closing minimum waves through the roof, restaurants going downhill.
Quality of life in Michigan is plummeting. And I'm sorry,
I don't have sympathy none. I sympathize with the people
who voted the right way. But Michigan as a whole
(23:05):
wanted this. You loved abortion. I need to murder my baby,
It's all that matters. Hey, wait a minute, why is
my restaurant closing because you're a moron who votes on abortion. Congratulations,
you got what you get. In the United States of America,
wide open border flooding the country with the illegos for
(23:27):
four years, internationally embarrassed several times over more than just Afghanistan.
But we'll talk about that. Our strategic oil reserve wiped out.
They drained it to help their election chances in the midterms.
A complete communist takeover of the Department of Justice and FBI,
(23:48):
where they've thrown their political opponents in prison for four years.
And if you voted for Joe Biden back in twenty twenty,
you did this. We have got to stop excusing the voter. Look.
I addressed the question a little bit ago about how
do these people just ignore laws? How is it possible
these politicians can just ignore laws. The American people are
(24:11):
not interested and engaged enough in politics to hold our
politicians accountable. And an uninterested, uninformed public is the greatest
benefit in the world to an evil tyrant. And that's
why we have evil tyrants who run the country because
the public doesn't care. They got their Netflix, they got
their air conditioning. Life is comfortable. The air conditioning's working.
(24:36):
They don't look you know what, that's a very good point, Chris.
Chris said, the normies didn't know about the training stuff.
You remember that ad that Trump ran. We've played the
audio for you, the ad Trump ran about Kamala Harris
and her support for training inmates at taxpayer's expense. You
know what was the wildest thing to me about that ad?
(24:56):
How obvious that was. I knew that you knew that.
When I saw the ad, I actually said to myself, well, yeah, everyone,
everyone knows that's their position. But that ad was so
impactful because for millions of Americans, that was the first
time they heard about it. What these guys, These guys
are into the tranny stuff. I had no idea. Anyway,
(25:19):
the game's on if we don't step up as a
population and get more involved than interested in politics. This
is how it's gonna go. Jesse Big Hans Kelly, if
the system contacted you and offered a ten million dollar
check to write the commed manifesto promoting communism, would you
take it? Absolutely? I'm kidding, I would not. I Uh,
(25:46):
Like I've said before, I'm not a good person. I've
never told you that I don't pretend to be. I'm
just I'm one big flaw right, one big fail. But
I am not see that. I wanted to lead with
that because what I'm about to say is going to
sound like I'm tooting my own corn. And you know,
(26:06):
the Oracle would never do something like that. But I'm
just not a big money guy. And it's not that
I dislike money. I like money just fine. I like
a delicious steak dinner, just fine. I like flying first class.
I like comfortable shoes, you know that. I like a
car that doesn't break down. I'm I'm not acting like
(26:26):
I'm some sort of Buddhist monk who's above money. I'm
not saying that. But money has never driven me. Back
when I didn't have any of it, it didn't drive me. Obviously,
I needed money to pay the bills. And like I said,
I'm not acting like a monk here. Money's fine, but
presenting me with a ten million dollar check to violate
(26:47):
what I believe would not even be tempting to me
at all, would not even be tempting to me. No,
I am not for sale, Jesse. You just call Lindsey
Graham flimsy. Why don't you call him Flimsy Graham for
a knucklehead like you. I'm sure you would have to
come up with that on I'm sure you would have
come up with that on your own. His name is Pat.
(27:08):
I just had a great idea from now on on
this show. I just thought of this. Instead of calling
him Lindsey Graham, We're gonna call him Flimsy Graham. Just
popped into my head and now we're running with it. Chris,
this is what happens when you have a mind that
(27:29):
works so well, it works so fast. My mind. I
want you to think about Chris's mind like a Have
you ever seen a slug on the sidewalk? It lost
its shell and it's slowly dying as it's barely making
its way over to the grass. That's how I want
you to think about Chris's mind, my mind. Have you
(27:52):
ever seen an indie car race with those cars they
make those sounds and they go super super fast. Chris's
mind is the slug. Mine is one of those indie cars.
Flimsy Graham. I can't believe I came up with that.
Speaker 5 (28:08):
Hey, Jesse Michael, quick question for you. If anything were
to happen to where you know Let's say President Biden
gets sick, are incapacitated, and Kamala becomes president for the
remainder of the term through the twenty fifth Amendment, etc.
And a vice president is not approved by the House
(28:30):
and Senate the nominee for vice president and there's a
vacancy in the vice president's spot. Who would certify the
election on January sixth if there was no vice president?
Is there a constitutional contingency for that?
Speaker 1 (28:43):
The Pope Statue of liberty admirer. If you had to
fire Chris and the new guy his name is Corey,
I don't care either. And if you had to fire
Chris and the new guy and replace them with two
current elected officials, who would you hire? Nerds like Mike
Johnson and Pete Ricketts probably do it since you do
all the work anyway, good point. Would you go with entertainment?
(29:04):
Someone like Grandma Vodka and John Fetterman? Well, we couldn't
have Nancy Pelosi in here. We've had one of those
big half gallon handles of vodka in this studio ever
since we moved in, and I don't think anyone's ever
opened the thing. Did you open it? Chris? Did you
are you drunk right now now, Chris is see nobody
(29:25):
here is a heavy drinker or anything like that. But
Nancy Pelosi, she would break the office. Chris would lose
his mind with the liquor bills. We wouldn't do that. No,
if you had, If we had to hire a couple
elected officials to work in here, it would probably be
Lauren Bobert and Anna Pauline a Luna. Anyway, your dog
needs nutrition. You know that your dog doesn't get nutrition
(29:49):
from dog food. It's brown because it's dead. They kill
everything in dog food. That's why our dogs die too early.
I know that's a little morbid, but our dog dogs
die before they should. I think back to every dog
I ever had, and I know I lost them too early,
except for the ones that got hit by a car.
Roughgreens couldn't help there. But Roughgreens provides vitamins, minerals, probiotics,
(30:12):
the things your dog needs to live longer and healthier
and happier. Go get a free Jumpstart trio bag and
you will see such a difference in your dog. And
they have Mealgreens now too for you cat people. But
a free Jumpstart trio bag. Fred His breath is better,
his digestive system doesn't act up anymore. Eight three three
(30:35):
three three my dog or go to Roughgreens dot com
slash Jesse We'll be back. Truth attitude Jesse Kelly. It
is the Jesse Kelly Show on a Friday. If you
don't like that song, you don't like America. That's what
I'm talking about. And it is, of course an ass
(30:57):
doctor Jesse Friday. We're gonna keep our folks there because
if I focus on this speech by Christopher Ray, my
head's gonna pop off.
Speaker 4 (31:04):
Saying that is most inspiring to me about the FBI
when I reflect on all that I've seen and experience
over the past seven and a half years, is the
heart of the FBI America. The world really knows the
FBI for our fidelity, bravery, and integrity.
Speaker 1 (31:22):
And they should.
Speaker 4 (31:23):
That's great, they should, But I wish they also knew
how fiercely our folks care for each other and how
much of our heart we put into our FBI family.
Speaker 1 (31:35):
Remember when Remember when we had that leaked memo from
the Richmond Field office and we found out the FBI
was in filtrating churches. Remember that.
Speaker 4 (31:49):
It's interesting what I see and what I hear wherever
I am is that the work we're doing every day,
The investigations were conducting, the partnerships were building.
Speaker 1 (31:59):
The Remember when they sent a swat team. They sent
a swat team to the home of a pastor and
they pointed guns at his wife and his children. And
his crime was well nothing, because the local DA had
already declined to charge him with anything, and they tried
to charge him and he ended up getting off scott free.
But they pointed guns at his wife and his kids.
(32:21):
An evil, evil secret police agency, truly truly evil. But
this is how these people see themselves. They see themselves
as the vanguard of the system.
Speaker 2 (32:34):
Right.
Speaker 1 (32:34):
That's why they're always talking about how great they are.
Speaker 4 (32:36):
Saying that is most inspiring to me about the FBI.
When I reflect on all that I've seen and experience.
Speaker 1 (32:43):
I can't do it anymore. Jesse Jesse leathers. He says,
what was the one thing when you were in Iraq
that just made you laugh? I mean laugh so hard
you had tears. When you think of it today, you smirk.
Your story of the MS constipation and splash down cracked
me up good. It sounds like you could use a
good laugh. I don't know about laughter. I'll think about that,
(33:09):
but I will tell you there was there was a great,
great moment. I remember we were, you know, we were
in Kuwait and then George Bush declared war, and then
we went into Iraq and we did the whole tour
right cleared up the bag Dad and you know, securing
bag Dad and all the other crap that comes with that.
(33:31):
And from there, once Bagdad was fairly secure, they moved
us down to a place called Najaf Na Joff. I
always thought it was ling the Joff, but again, you
don't know what's going on most of the time, and
you're in the people back home watching on the news
knew more about that stuff than we actually did. But
we go back to Najaf and in the Joff, we
have to secure this kind of outdoor farmers market area.
(33:53):
Because it had walls around it, we knew we could
build it up into a fairly secure perimeter. And then
we would go out on patrol doing various things, guarding
AMMO dumbs, hunting down people, just things you have to do, right,
breaking people's jaws, little things like that. And at one
point in time we had to go because the mayor
of Najaf. His life was in imminent danger because everyone's
(34:17):
so freaking violent in that place. And we had to
go do shifts guarding the mayor's residence. So we go
over there. Now I know you're gonna mock me, but
food is a really big deal to me, as you
well know. And by this point in time, we had
had nothing but MRIs. It was just nothing but crap
food that you got to get to get by, you know,
(34:38):
that's what they can do. They can't serve you a
gourmet meal. No waffle house isn't coming out, So you
got what you got. And one day, close to one
of the gates, there was and I forget the circumstances
around it, but there was kind of this shell of
a building and it was multiple floors, there's three or
four stories at least, but there were no walls, there
(34:59):
was no ceiling on it, but it was all just
concrete cinder blocks, like the shell, like someone framed one
out and then left it. And close to this building
was one of the gates where we had to guard
the mayor's mansion. And this guy, I think it was
a dude, maybe it was a lady. I'm trying to
remember you forget some things, right. I think it was
a dude, though. This guy comes up and he's selling
(35:23):
these They're not breakfast tacos. They were breakfast pitas. And
it was this freshly made peta, you know what a
pita is. And he opened up the pita so it's
a pocket and he must have used about twenty sticks
of butter with these scrambled eggs and chopped up onions,
so there was no cheese or anything like that. I mean,
it's Iraq, but it was a peda with buttery, scrambled
(35:46):
eggs and onions in it, and he was selling them
to us. I still remember this for a dollar apiece.
And I had two dollars on me, and I pay
him two bucks. I take these things. Remember this is me.
I'm obsessed with food anyway, and I take these things.
I haven't had anything good to eat. And I go
(36:06):
up to the top floor of that shelled out building,
the shell of a building, and I'm by myself. I
just want to be by myself. And I sat there
and I wolfed those things down and I had buttering
grease coming down my face and I was audibly eating
it was it was embarrassing. If you. I wish I
(36:27):
could have a recording of it. It was m oh,
it was all Chris. It was bad. It was in
any way you can embarrass yourself, I practically did. And
I sat up there in the peace and quiet, nothing exploding,
nobody's shooting, nobody dying, nobody's screaming, nobody nothing. And I
sat up there by myself and I ate those two things.
(36:47):
And yeah, you probably wouldn't even look at them twice today,
but at the moment, that was the greatest thing I
had ever eaten in my life. And that was one
of the greatest experiences of my life. Sit down and
eat a couple of breakfast petas. And I know it
doesn't sound like anything. I probably didn't even relay that correctly,
but at the time it was everything to me. The
(37:11):
only bad thing about it that I can think of
is I didn't have my male Vitality stack to wash
wash down afterwards, because that's my breakfast routine now. When
I get up and I eat my breakfast, I go
get my little little pill thing like I'm a ninety
year old man, only it doesn't have pills in it.
It has my natural herbal supplements from chalk. It has
my male vitality stack in it. And like this morning,
(37:34):
I did it and I opened up my little Friday
thing and I took my male vitality stack. And I
do that because I want energy. I do that because
I want to feel good. I want my mind to
work good. I want my mood to be good. That's
why I do these things. Chalk is running a massive schedule,
schedule a massive special in November. It's their Black Friday Special.
(37:57):
It's only in November. Take it, bandage of it. Go
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C Hoq dot com promo code Jesse. Chalk dot com
(38:22):
promo code Jesse. We still have an hour left. Let's
talk about the Internet. Did it advance communism? And should
you join the National Guard if you're old? Hang on
This is a Jesse Kelly show. It is the Jesse
Kelly Show. Another hour of the Jesse Kelly Show on
a Friday, and ask doctor Jesse. Friday, we're gonna discuss
this Russia, North Korea, America thing veterans cheating on disability payments.
In fact, I'll probably open with that. Someone wants to
(00:32):
talk about burger toppings, all that and so much more
coming up on the world famous Jesse Kellys Show. All right,
I'm gonna begin with this one here, Jesse, what do
you think about VA disability payments? My youngest brother was
a marine and living in Maryland. I know a lot
of military people, many of whom received disability payments despite
working lucrative jobs and making well over six figures. They
(00:56):
aren't missing limbs and eyes, et cetera. I know one
man who's considered one hundred percent disabled and he receives
a hefty check. Plus he doesn't pay property taxes because
his hearing was affected. I'm all for paying disabled vets,
but if you're in one piece and can make two
hundred k at a civilian job, are you the person
that needs that money or could it be better allocated
(01:17):
to gold Star families. Okay, I'm not going to say
her name, but let's just be honest about this. There
are a lot of veterans, a lot of them who
cheat on this disability stuff. They pretend to be disfigured
and disabled to get free money from the government. And
I personally know some guys I was in the Marines
(01:40):
with when we were getting out. You know, when you
get out, they work you over medically and they hand
you your medical file and they teach you, hey, this
apply for disability if you're injured or something like that.
But people know how to gain the system and work
the system and lie about that things. And friends of
(02:03):
mine who were not disabled and were not disfigured, they
worked this and worked that and they would get disability
and it was a nice check, and they would come
try to convince me to do it. Hey, Kelly, you
got to do this. Hey it's easy. Hey it's free money. Hey,
(02:23):
you got to do this. And I don't steal. If
I was disabled or disfigured in some way, yes, I
would do it. And if you are a vet, that
is that go get your money. You go get your money.
You fought for your country. If you gave up pieces
of yourself for your country. You go get paid for that,
(02:45):
and anyone else not saying I'm judging you because I'm not.
I do not take what is not mine. I do
not claim to be a moral person or a good person.
I am immoral. I am not a good person at all.
But I do not steal, and for me, that's thievery.
And I could not bring myself to steal from my
(03:08):
country because I had served my country. Could not do it.
It's very very very very very common. It's something people
don't talk about a lot. And the reason people don't
talk about it is Americans love their veterans. It's just
we have a heart for veterans, and I'm glad we do.
You should. It's really the mark of a good society
(03:29):
that we love and appreciate our veterans. And people don't
want to criticize them. They don't want to ever bring
this up because it sounds like you're blasting away at veterans.
But because I don't care about offending people, I'm more
than happy to bring it up. It's wrong. I will
not do it. I refuse to do it. And it's
very very very common, very very common. Jesse I'm wondering
(03:53):
why Russia can use Iran or North Korea drones and
rackets into Ukraine, but the Ukraine can't use US or
other countries rackets. I think he means rockets. I think
he said, oh, why can Russia? I don't even know
what you're saying, buddy, that's not very good English. You
need to spell check that. That was terrible.
Speaker 2 (04:12):
Hey, uncle Jesse, you ever think about adding some flair
to your wardrobe. I'm talking white gloves like Michael Jackson
to accentuate your enormous hands. Hey man, my real question
is what's going on in Pennsylvania here about Casey hasn't
yet completed. Is McCormick's Senate position in jeopardy. I hear
they're counting the legal ballots or something like that. What's
(04:33):
going on?
Speaker 1 (04:34):
Well, Casey conceded, Casey finally conceded, and we still have
a very broken election system in this country in blue areas,
and they broke it on purpose. To have votes still
being counted a week, two weeks after an election is
an international embarrassment. It's an embarrassment. Oh, I don't understand
(04:57):
why this is. It's not complicated at all. Democrats want
to cheat in elections because Democrats are communists who only
care about power. There's no moral founding whatsoever. Therefore, they
will put into place as many rules and laws and
procedures as many as humanly possible, in order to muddy
the waters and ensure that they will at least be
(05:20):
able to cheat. It is not an accident that every
single location where it takes forever to count the votes
is a location that is controlled by Democrats. It's not
an accident. Democrats campaign nationally that you shouldn't even have
to show ID to vote, since everyone can get an ID.
There's only one reason you wouldn't want people to show ID.
(05:42):
That's because you intend to cheat in elections. There's a
reason they tried to pass HR one right after the
election of Joe Biden. Hr one nationalized elections and it
ensured all mail in ballots for everywhere for all time.
Why would you do something insane because mail in ballots
are where the most cheating happens. Now, just like I
(06:04):
told you before the election, the most suicidal, insane, dumbest
idea I've ever heard is this idea you get from
people on the right when they say every election stolen.
Remember how I used to yell at you about that
every election stolen. It's stupid, it's insane, it's a lie,
and we just proved it's not true at all. Every
(06:26):
election isn't stolen. Stop with that idiocy. But some are stolen.
Many are stolen. We are getting better, and credit to
the RNC. I can't believe I'm saying that, but they
really did a great job. We are getting better at
sniffing it out, lawyering it up, luring up and stopping
it before it starts. The RNC they stopped a lot
(06:52):
of dirty stuff during that election. We still have a
long way to go. It's just really dirty, man. These
people were really dirty. Oh, speaking of dirty, Sonny Hasted
on the View once again had to read a legal
note because she keeps lying. The best thing the Right
ever did was start suing these media organizations, suing the
(07:14):
daylights off of them, because now they can't just tell
whatever lie they want. They always have to add the
legal notes to avoid getting setle.
Speaker 3 (07:23):
Note, I have a legal note. Matt Gates has long
denied all allegations and has not been charged with any crime.
Gates previously dismissed allegations that he paid for sex, saying
that quote, someone is trying to recategorize my generosity to
ex girlfriends as something more than toward. Another legal note,
Pete Hegseth's lawyer said he paid the woman in twenty
(07:43):
twenty three to head off the threat of a basis lawsuit.
He has denied any wrongdoing. Just call the show legal
note from now on.
Speaker 1 (07:53):
They're so angry. They get so angry they have to
make these legal notes. Now why, Because communists lie at
all times, you cannot possibly be honest about their demonic
religion of destruction when you think about it. I was
thinking about this last night. I had some peace and
quiet because I've left the room. I was singing about this.
(08:17):
Think about the presidential campaign. Kamala Harris just ran It
was all a brazen lie about every position she's ever taken.
They were running ads talking about how strong they were
on the border when they opened up the border on purpose.
These people lie about the positions they take at all times.
In fact, there was a poll. I should dig this up,
(08:37):
but it doesn't matter. You could go look it up yourself.
There was this crazy poll that came out where somebody
was calling voters, not you, not the informed. They were
calling normies and they were telling them Democrat positions, and
the normies said the polster was lying because no Democrat,
(08:59):
nobody would act, actually take those positions. And the positions
were things like transing kids behind the back of parents.
The actual Democrat position was so insane that normies didn't
believe that was an actual position they had. They just
lie about everything. And again, I'll hand it to NPR,
(09:19):
why do you do that.
Speaker 4 (09:20):
I think our reverence for the truth might become might
have become a bit of a distraction that is preventing
us from finding consensus and getting important things done.
Speaker 1 (09:30):
Well, gosh, this truth. We're trying to get things done.
I don't have time to tell the truth. If I
tell the truth, then our revolution is going to fail.
Our revolution involves destroying everything, and so we have to
lie otherwise people will catch on to that fact. They
lie about everything at all times. Do you know do
(09:54):
you know how many Democrats would be mortified if they
knew what they actually believed, if they found out what
Democrats actually did and believed. I can't tell you how
many people email this show and they'll say something to
the effect of Jesse. My dad is this lifelong Democrat,
and I told him they opened up the border on purpose,
(10:15):
and he said, that's not true. It's obviously true. Like
I said, they're bringing them in as fast as possible.
But if you are a Democrat, it is a religion
to you and always has been a religion to you.
And if someone was to pull that thread enough, then
it's not that your political party would crumble. Your entire
(10:38):
worldview crumbles if you find out you've been lied to.
So instead they just stay in the lies. And I'm
just so loving these legal notes. It's hilarious to me.
I also love chalk because it makes me full of energy.
These vitality stacks, they have male ones and female ones,
natural herbal supplements. They're so good for your energy. And
(10:59):
it's not that. It's not that caffeine energy where your
hands are shaky and sweaty. It's nothing like that at all.
You just feel great. I'll get home from work at night, right,
I'll get home from work at night and sometimes I'll
work out. That's how good I feel. I'm just full
of pep and energy, and I have chalk to thank
(11:19):
for that. Take advantage of the black Friday special and
get some natural herbal supplements. Get a subscription. There's a
massive discount you unlock with the code Jesse. You get
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hoq dot com promo code Jesse twenty percent increase in
(11:42):
your tea levels in ninety days without sticking a needle
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levels up twenty percent? That's after ninety days. What are
you going to feel like in a year? Chalk dot
com promo code Jesse. Burger Top in Russia. Next The
Jesse Kelly Show I Like It returns. Next it is
(12:07):
the Jesse Kelly Show on a Friday. Reminding you you
can email the show Jesse at jessekellyshow dot com. We
are having a blast as we always do on a Friday, Jesse.
I need your thoughts on the proper burger setup, specifically
add ons. My family and I went to our favorite
(12:27):
burger place last week. My oldest and I tried something
new by adding a layer of cream cheese to our
standard double with American cheese. We were not even. We
were not overwhelmed, not even whelmed. Do do you the burgermeister,
have a topping limit? I'm starting to think condiments should
(12:47):
be the only thing you put on cheeseburgers, other than
maybe pickles. At some point, toppings take away from the burger.
What say you? All right? So we're obviously not talking
about my world famous Jesse Kelly bergers because they don't
need any toppings at all, no condiments. Don't you dare
put veggies on it. We're not going to talk about
(13:09):
me and the fact that I already came up with
the perfect recipe. Let's talk about you and your inferior
burgers whatever, whether you're making them or purchasing them somewhere. Yes,
there have to be topping limits, you know you want
to keep. Back when I was running for Congress in Arizona,
(13:31):
there was a guy, a congressman, Pete Sessions. He's still
around on what he's doing now, but Pete Sessions was
a congressman back then. He was a big shot and
he came out to raise money. He helped me raise
money try to run for Congress. And Pete Sessions loved
everywhere I went with him. He gave the same speech
to people, and he would talk about keeping the big
deal the big deal, meaning talk about big issues on
(13:55):
the election. Don't find yourself wading through the minutia. Take
the big things people care about. Keep it a big deal.
Like you saw the campaign Trump just ran, he did
very well. What did he talk about the entire time? Inflation? Immigration, inflation, immigration, inflation, immigration,
very few side roads from inflation, immigration. He kept the
big deal, the big deal. It's what people cared about.
(14:18):
It's what he talked about. This all comes back to
your cheeseburger. A cheeseburger, it's designed to put delicious meat
with melty cheese on it. It's designed to deliver those
two things into your mouth. Those are the stars of
the show. When you start throwing all this other crap
(14:43):
on your berry, you haven't had my peanut butter and
jelly bacon burger. You're right, I haven't because my cheeseburger
doesn't need peanut butter and jelly. Acceptable additions to a
burger are, by the way, not pickles. Either you pickle
people or crazy. Now hold on, Corey, let me explain.
Let me explain. I'm not anti pickle. Okay, I like
(15:05):
pickles as much as the next man. I wish I
could take that back, but you understand what I'm saying.
I'll eat a pickle. I'm fine if the wife has
some deal pickles at home, sometimes she gets some from
the store. All comala down a deal pickle, I'm I'm
fine with it. When you put a pickle on a burger,
it takes away from the big deal, the meat, the
(15:27):
cheese that the pickle like grabs you. It's all you
can taste is the pickle. The only acceptable additions to
a burger are things that in a way compliment compliment
the meat in the cheese. Ketchup is okay. I personally
don't eat ketchup on a burger much, but I'll get them.
(15:47):
You know, McDonald's puts ketchup on a burger, I'll grab
a Micde's burger. I don't take it off. Ketchup's fine,
Mustard's fine, Mayo's fine adds a little tang on there.
Stop it, Chris, There's nothing wrong with that. Mayo's Fine.
Onions can be fine on a burger. Fried jalapinos if
you find a place that has fried alipinos or jalapino strips.
(16:10):
I was talking to Chris yesterday, dairy queen used to
do that. They might still do that, but we used
to get a dairy queen for burgers, and they'll they'll
do that. Yeah, Chris and egg. You know what. You
know why a fried egg works on a burger because
it doesn't come in and try to take over. It
knows it's not the star of the show. It's a
bit player. You want you need bit players, right, it's
(16:30):
a role player. If you're in the NBA, you need
a guy who's gonna be able to play defense and rebound.
Not everyone gets to score thirty points a game. That's
what the fried egg is. It knows its role. Its
job is to be there, add some yolk, compliment the
meat in the cheese flavors. This is the role of
the egg. Where people go nuts is they start picking
(16:52):
every little thing I need. Let us honey, tomatoes, We
need extra pickles on this? Should I get eight thousand onions?
Then we need ketchup mustard and may and then let's
add some hot sauce to it. It didn't need any of that.
You know what Lima beans needs that. The wife was
trying to get us all to eat broccoli a couple
days ago. Because she's always trying to be healthy and
things like that. She was trying to get us all
(17:13):
to get to eat broccoli. So she did what many
people do and made this big broccoli casserole, and she
threw so much crep in there. It was just cheese
and crumbs and whatever. You know what broccoli casserole is.
Everyone's seen broccoli castrole And yeah it was still gross,
but that wasn't her fault. She knew broccoli is disgusting,
(17:35):
it's foul, it's barely even edible, And so I have
to throw a bunch of great things in there because
broccoli needs help. Broccoli is special needs. The cheeseburger is
a genius. The broccoli needs an extra tutor, a helping
(17:57):
hand because it's disgusting. A cheeseburger doesn't need any of
those things. Think about broccoli as if it's Chris. Me.
I'm the cheeseburger. Chris doesn't mean he's look doesn't mean
he's a bad person. This needs a lot of help me.
(18:18):
I can basically do it all on my own. Does
that explain it? I hope that explained it perfectly, at
least in a way I understood it. Chris doesn't seem
to see it my way. But that's beside the point
you need to give to Tunnel to Towers. It's Christmas
season and Tunnel to Towers they're special all twelve months
of the year, but in Christmas season it's really really
(18:40):
extra special. These families who have lost a father, a mother,
fallen first responder families, gold Star families, they get presented
with homes. This season. They're building smart homes for catastrophically
injured veterans. I lost my leg. I can't do this.
I'm missing my arms. Tunnel to Towers is the organization
(19:01):
that's helping, and unlike a lot of quote veterans organizations,
they do more than just talk about it. They have
more than just a fancy label. More than ninety five
cents of every dollar goes directly to its programs. In
the nonprofit world. That's unheard of. Eleven bucks a month
is all they asked for. Sign up to give it automatically,
(19:23):
you'll never know it's gone. T the number two T
dot org t twot dot org. All right, Ukraine and
Russia and Joe Biden, we will talk about that next.
Is it possible to bribe me, of course it is.
We'll discuss that and more.
Speaker 5 (19:42):
Hang on the Jesse Kelly Show.
Speaker 1 (19:46):
It is the Jesse Kelly Show on a Friday, and
ask doctor Jesse Friday. Oh no, my hat, I forgot
my hat there it is. I'm learning this sweet hat today.
It's kind of like one of these floppy old school hats.
I don't know what they're called. Jewish producer Chris has
not been very nice about it. Corey was a lot
more supportive, and I appreciate that. It's obviously jealousy. We
(20:08):
all know what that is. El Hefe of the Little Hands.
Why on earth is a man known to be mentally
impaired being allowed to give Ukraine permission to escalate their
attacks into Russia. His name is Kevin. Why is this
guy calling the twenty twenty four NBA Champions of Balls.
(20:28):
You're Suldy right, Well, let's just be honest about this. Obviously,
Joe Biden isn't making this call. Joe Biden hasn't made
any calls for four years. The swamp is making all
the calls for him, all the little Obama communists he
put around him, like Susan Rice and Victoria Nunez and
Lilisa Monico's and these people, these are the ones who
(20:50):
are just setting policy for the United States of America.
They're the ones deciding the who's who and the what's what.
But all that aside, why is this allowed? Why is
this allowed? Elections have consequences. I honestly, I know, we
just want a big election, and so everyone just kind
of wants to move on and forget about that. But
(21:14):
we just had four years of Joe Biden and cheating
aside from twenty to twenty, which they very obviously did,
but cheating aside. Roughly half the country went out and
voted for a cadaver and he was obviously a cadaverous.
It was obvious to anyone who cared enough about their
country to pay attention that he was not a functional adult.
(21:38):
And now this country has had to endure four years
of this child sitting in the White House drooling on himself.
And it is not outside of the realm of possibility
that that decision to put him in the White House
will cause World War III. And that's what happens when
(21:58):
you elect Democrats. And there are so many people who
are so mind warped in this country they can't help,
but vote for these people over and over and over again.
Elections have consequences. You heard me ranting about Michigan. They're
going through this too. Michigan was a red state in
twenty sixteen, and then they had this witch governor, Gretchen
(22:21):
Whitmer locked them down. Michigan was locked down like New
York was locked down. Michigan was locked down like California
was locked down. They didn't let people buy gardening seeds
in the grocery store. And after years of that, the
people of Michigan, because Roe versus Wade had been overturned,
they went to the voting booth and they didn't vote
(22:44):
to throw out the tyrant who locked down their gardening seeds.
They voted because they loved abortion so much. And now
businesses are closing minimum waves through the roof, restaurants going downhill.
Quality of life in Michigan is plummeting. And I'm sorry,
I don't have sympathy none. I sympathize with the people
who voted the right way. But Michigan as a whole
(23:05):
wanted this. You loved abortion. I need to murder my baby,
It's all that matters. Hey, wait a minute, why is
my restaurant closing because you're a moron who votes on abortion. Congratulations,
you got what you get. In the United States of America,
wide open border flooding the country with the illegos for
(23:27):
four years, internationally embarrassed several times over more than just Afghanistan.
But we'll talk about that. Our strategic oil reserve wiped out.
They drained it to help their election chances in the midterms.
A complete communist takeover of the Department of Justice and FBI,
(23:48):
where they've thrown their political opponents in prison for four years.
And if you voted for Joe Biden back in twenty twenty,
you did this. We have got to stop excusing the voter. Look.
I addressed the question a little bit ago about how
do these people just ignore laws? How is it possible
these politicians can just ignore laws. The American people are
(24:11):
not interested and engaged enough in politics to hold our
politicians accountable. And an uninterested, uninformed public is the greatest
benefit in the world to an evil tyrant. And that's
why we have evil tyrants who run the country because
the public doesn't care. They got their Netflix, they got
their air conditioning. Life is comfortable. The air conditioning's working.
(24:36):
They don't look you know what, that's a very good point, Chris.
Chris said, the normies didn't know about the training stuff.
You remember that ad that Trump ran. We've played the
audio for you, the ad Trump ran about Kamala Harris
and her support for training inmates at taxpayer's expense. You
know what was the wildest thing to me about that ad?
(24:56):
How obvious that was. I knew that you knew that.
When I saw the ad, I actually said to myself, well, yeah, everyone,
everyone knows that's their position. But that ad was so
impactful because for millions of Americans, that was the first
time they heard about it. What these guys, These guys
are into the tranny stuff. I had no idea. Anyway,
(25:19):
the game's on if we don't step up as a
population and get more involved than interested in politics. This
is how it's gonna go. Jesse Big Hans Kelly, if
the system contacted you and offered a ten million dollar
check to write the commed manifesto promoting communism, would you
take it? Absolutely? I'm kidding, I would not. I Uh,
(25:46):
Like I've said before, I'm not a good person. I've
never told you that I don't pretend to be. I'm
just I'm one big flaw right, one big fail. But
I am not see that. I wanted to lead with
that because what I'm about to say is going to
sound like I'm tooting my own corn. And you know,
(26:06):
the Oracle would never do something like that. But I'm
just not a big money guy. And it's not that
I dislike money. I like money just fine. I like
a delicious steak dinner, just fine. I like flying first class.
I like comfortable shoes, you know that. I like a
car that doesn't break down. I'm I'm not acting like
(26:26):
I'm some sort of Buddhist monk who's above money. I'm
not saying that. But money has never driven me. Back
when I didn't have any of it, it didn't drive me. Obviously,
I needed money to pay the bills. And like I said,
I'm not acting like a monk here. Money's fine, but
presenting me with a ten million dollar check to violate
(26:47):
what I believe would not even be tempting to me
at all, would not even be tempting to me. No,
I am not for sale, Jesse. You just call Lindsey
Graham flimsy. Why don't you call him Flimsy Graham for
a knucklehead like you. I'm sure you would have to
come up with that on I'm sure you would have
come up with that on your own. His name is Pat.
(27:08):
I just had a great idea from now on on
this show. I just thought of this. Instead of calling
him Lindsey Graham, We're gonna call him Flimsy Graham. Just
popped into my head and now we're running with it. Chris,
this is what happens when you have a mind that
(27:29):
works so well, it works so fast. My mind. I
want you to think about Chris's mind like a Have
you ever seen a slug on the sidewalk? It lost
its shell and it's slowly dying as it's barely making
its way over to the grass. That's how I want
you to think about Chris's mind, my mind. Have you
(27:52):
ever seen an indie car race with those cars they
make those sounds and they go super super fast. Chris's
mind is the slug. Mine is one of those indie cars.
Flimsy Graham. I can't believe I came up with that.
Speaker 5 (28:08):
Hey, Jesse Michael, quick question for you. If anything were
to happen to where you know Let's say President Biden
gets sick, are incapacitated, and Kamala becomes president for the
remainder of the term through the twenty fifth Amendment, etc.
And a vice president is not approved by the House
(28:30):
and Senate the nominee for vice president and there's a
vacancy in the vice president's spot. Who would certify the
election on January sixth if there was no vice president?
Is there a constitutional contingency for that?
Speaker 1 (28:43):
The Pope Statue of liberty admirer. If you had to
fire Chris and the new guy his name is Corey,
I don't care either. And if you had to fire
Chris and the new guy and replace them with two
current elected officials, who would you hire? Nerds like Mike
Johnson and Pete Ricketts probably do it since you do
all the work anyway, good point. Would you go with entertainment?
(29:04):
Someone like Grandma Vodka and John Fetterman? Well, we couldn't
have Nancy Pelosi in here. We've had one of those
big half gallon handles of vodka in this studio ever
since we moved in, and I don't think anyone's ever
opened the thing. Did you open it? Chris? Did you
are you drunk right now now, Chris is see nobody
(29:25):
here is a heavy drinker or anything like that. But
Nancy Pelosi, she would break the office. Chris would lose
his mind with the liquor bills. We wouldn't do that. No,
if you had, If we had to hire a couple
elected officials to work in here, it would probably be
Lauren Bobert and Anna Pauline a Luna. Anyway, your dog
needs nutrition. You know that your dog doesn't get nutrition
(29:49):
from dog food. It's brown because it's dead. They kill
everything in dog food. That's why our dogs die too early.
I know that's a little morbid, but our dog dogs
die before they should. I think back to every dog
I ever had, and I know I lost them too early,
except for the ones that got hit by a car.
Roughgreens couldn't help there. But Roughgreens provides vitamins, minerals, probiotics,
(30:12):
the things your dog needs to live longer and healthier
and happier. Go get a free Jumpstart trio bag and
you will see such a difference in your dog. And
they have Mealgreens now too for you cat people. But
a free Jumpstart trio bag. Fred His breath is better,
his digestive system doesn't act up anymore. Eight three three
(30:35):
three three my dog or go to Roughgreens dot com
slash Jesse We'll be back. Truth attitude Jesse Kelly. It
is the Jesse Kelly Show on a Friday. If you
don't like that song, you don't like America. That's what
I'm talking about. And it is, of course an ass
(30:57):
doctor Jesse Friday. We're gonna keep our folks there because
if I focus on this speech by Christopher Ray, my
head's gonna pop off.
Speaker 4 (31:04):
Saying that is most inspiring to me about the FBI
when I reflect on all that I've seen and experience
over the past seven and a half years, is the
heart of the FBI America. The world really knows the
FBI for our fidelity, bravery, and integrity.
Speaker 1 (31:22):
And they should.
Speaker 4 (31:23):
That's great, they should, But I wish they also knew
how fiercely our folks care for each other and how
much of our heart we put into our FBI family.
Speaker 1 (31:35):
Remember when Remember when we had that leaked memo from
the Richmond Field office and we found out the FBI
was in filtrating churches. Remember that.
Speaker 4 (31:49):
It's interesting what I see and what I hear wherever
I am is that the work we're doing every day,
The investigations were conducting, the partnerships were building.
Speaker 1 (31:59):
The Remember when they sent a swat team. They sent
a swat team to the home of a pastor and
they pointed guns at his wife and his children. And
his crime was well nothing, because the local DA had
already declined to charge him with anything, and they tried
to charge him and he ended up getting off scott free.
But they pointed guns at his wife and his kids.
(32:21):
An evil, evil secret police agency, truly truly evil. But
this is how these people see themselves. They see themselves
as the vanguard of the system.
Speaker 2 (32:34):
Right.
Speaker 1 (32:34):
That's why they're always talking about how great they are.
Speaker 4 (32:36):
Saying that is most inspiring to me about the FBI.
When I reflect on all that I've seen and experience.
Speaker 1 (32:43):
I can't do it anymore. Jesse Jesse leathers. He says,
what was the one thing when you were in Iraq
that just made you laugh? I mean laugh so hard
you had tears. When you think of it today, you smirk.
Your story of the MS constipation and splash down cracked
me up good. It sounds like you could use a
good laugh. I don't know about laughter. I'll think about that,
(33:09):
but I will tell you there was there was a great,
great moment. I remember we were, you know, we were
in Kuwait and then George Bush declared war, and then
we went into Iraq and we did the whole tour
right cleared up the bag Dad and you know, securing
bag Dad and all the other crap that comes with that.
(33:31):
And from there, once Bagdad was fairly secure, they moved
us down to a place called Najaf Na Joff. I
always thought it was ling the Joff, but again, you
don't know what's going on most of the time, and
you're in the people back home watching on the news
knew more about that stuff than we actually did. But
we go back to Najaf and in the Joff, we
have to secure this kind of outdoor farmers market area.
(33:53):
Because it had walls around it, we knew we could
build it up into a fairly secure perimeter. And then
we would go out on patrol doing various things, guarding
AMMO dumbs, hunting down people, just things you have to do, right,
breaking people's jaws, little things like that. And at one
point in time we had to go because the mayor
of Najaf. His life was in imminent danger because everyone's
(34:17):
so freaking violent in that place. And we had to
go do shifts guarding the mayor's residence. So we go
over there. Now I know you're gonna mock me, but
food is a really big deal to me, as you
well know. And by this point in time, we had
had nothing but MRIs. It was just nothing but crap
food that you got to get to get by, you know,
(34:38):
that's what they can do. They can't serve you a
gourmet meal. No waffle house isn't coming out, So you
got what you got. And one day, close to one
of the gates, there was and I forget the circumstances
around it, but there was kind of this shell of
a building and it was multiple floors, there's three or
four stories at least, but there were no walls, there
(34:59):
was no ceiling on it, but it was all just
concrete cinder blocks, like the shell, like someone framed one
out and then left it. And close to this building
was one of the gates where we had to guard
the mayor's mansion. And this guy, I think it was
a dude, maybe it was a lady. I'm trying to
remember you forget some things, right. I think it was
a dude, though. This guy comes up and he's selling
(35:23):
these They're not breakfast tacos. They were breakfast pitas. And
it was this freshly made peta, you know what a
pita is. And he opened up the pita so it's
a pocket and he must have used about twenty sticks
of butter with these scrambled eggs and chopped up onions,
so there was no cheese or anything like that. I mean,
it's Iraq, but it was a peda with buttery, scrambled
(35:46):
eggs and onions in it, and he was selling them
to us. I still remember this for a dollar apiece.
And I had two dollars on me, and I pay
him two bucks. I take these things. Remember this is me.
I'm obsessed with food anyway, and I take these things.
I haven't had anything good to eat. And I go
(36:06):
up to the top floor of that shelled out building,
the shell of a building, and I'm by myself. I
just want to be by myself. And I sat there
and I wolfed those things down and I had buttering
grease coming down my face and I was audibly eating
it was it was embarrassing. If you. I wish I
(36:27):
could have a recording of it. It was m oh,
it was all Chris. It was bad. It was in
any way you can embarrass yourself, I practically did. And
I sat up there in the peace and quiet, nothing exploding,
nobody's shooting, nobody dying, nobody's screaming, nobody nothing. And I
sat up there by myself and I ate those two things.
(36:47):
And yeah, you probably wouldn't even look at them twice today,
but at the moment, that was the greatest thing I
had ever eaten in my life. And that was one
of the greatest experiences of my life. Sit down and
eat a couple of breakfast petas. And I know it
doesn't sound like anything. I probably didn't even relay that correctly,
but at the time it was everything to me. The
(37:11):
only bad thing about it that I can think of
is I didn't have my male Vitality stack to wash
wash down afterwards, because that's my breakfast routine now. When
I get up and I eat my breakfast, I go
get my little little pill thing like I'm a ninety
year old man, only it doesn't have pills in it.
It has my natural herbal supplements from chalk. It has
my male vitality stack in it. And like this morning,
(37:34):
I did it and I opened up my little Friday
thing and I took my male vitality stack. And I
do that because I want energy. I do that because
I want to feel good. I want my mind to
work good. I want my mood to be good. That's
why I do these things. Chalk is running a massive schedule,
schedule a massive special in November. It's their Black Friday Special.
(37:57):
It's only in November. Take it, bandage of it. Go
to chalk dot com and find something you love. It's
not just male vitality stacks and female vitality stacks. It's
more natural herbal supplements than you can count. And they're
standing by to help you. They will help you at Chalk.
C Hoq dot com promo code Jesse. Chalk dot com
(38:22):
promo code Jesse. We still have an hour left. Let's
talk about the Internet. Did it advance communism? And should
you join the National Guard if you're old? Hang on
Host
Jesse Kelly
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