Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
I love a short week, since the three day weekends
just make the week so much better, so much shorter
and so nice. We're already at Friday winning.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
I can't believe it.
Speaker 1 (00:09):
I know it's I love it. I just why can't
we do more of that? I mean what we could
do is instead of having full weeks, we could take
more long weekends.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Oh with our vacations. Hm, we could do that. We don't.
Why don't we do that, like one of the week's
out of the four?
Speaker 1 (00:26):
Well?
Speaker 2 (00:26):
Save up?
Speaker 1 (00:27):
Yeah, Romeo that used to work here in the afternoons
for many years. He's a jetbo pilot. Now. When I
first got on Kiss, before I was on the morning show,
I used to do Seacrest and he would come on
after me, so I would stay and hang out with him.
And this motherfucker was always off. Yeah, this dude had
and it was a running joke, how much vacation time
does this guy have?
Speaker 2 (00:45):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (00:45):
And one day I just asked them, I go, dude,
do you like have ten weeks of vacation? And he
explained it to me. He goes, no, I don't take
any full weeks yep.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
So he probably I wish we did it that way.
Speaker 1 (00:55):
Well, if you think about it, right, I think he
probably has you know, say he has four weeks vacation,
he might negotia like a fifth week because he's been
here so long. So that's twenty five days and then
you add on like a personal day, so you're looking
at twenty five to thirty days off. So that's twenty
five to thirty weekends of long weekends.
Speaker 3 (01:12):
Okay, but you know what, like what we could do
like on for instance, this one, right, we could have
taken Friday off, make it a four day for day,
or Thursday Friday Monday five days.
Speaker 1 (01:21):
You know what I was thinking? What do you think
about So Juneteenth we have off, it's on a Wednesday,
which is a little weird. What if the fourth of
July is on a Friday? Okay? What if we work
the juneteenth and trade it for the Thursday, so we're
actually off the third fourth, and then the next week
because our vacation is the week after the fourth. Oh,
(01:43):
so we'd extend our vacation by an extra day.
Speaker 2 (01:45):
Well, it wouldn't matter because we're not going anywhere.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
No, yeah we will. We had chips planned, but that's gone.
Speaker 2 (01:53):
We're not going.
Speaker 3 (01:53):
Anywhere, so does it really matter. Yeah, it doesn't matter
to me. I'm not doing anything as of you. I
gotta find out a whole newcation plan.
Speaker 1 (02:00):
I think I think we shot a little bit too
high on that. You know, it's a it's a very
it's it's like a once in a lifetime trip, but
it's a lot, it's a lot of money.
Speaker 3 (02:09):
It wasn't planned the most proper way. I would have
planned it differently.
Speaker 1 (02:13):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (02:13):
And you know what's funny is I literally said I
wanted to do it a certain way, and they didn't
listen to me.
Speaker 2 (02:19):
And I said, if they listened to me, it might
have been better.
Speaker 1 (02:21):
Well, the good news is that those trips were canceled,
but they are looking at different ones, maybe more in
the United States, maybe something you know, right, more affordable. Listen,
it costs money to go to these places, man, you know,
it does a lot of money. And it was an
eight day trip, by.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
The way, I would have been cool with a five
day or so.
Speaker 1 (02:39):
That's they're they're in talks to either shorten it or
change the destination. Yeah, which which would be fine. You know,
I'll go anywhere. I don't care. I mean, I like Florida.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
Hey, listen. You know me, I'll go to for listen.
Speaker 3 (02:51):
I could go to Fort Laarao deo right and give
you my own fucking tour. I know that Plutus with
the back of my hand. I love Fort l I
would love do for deal with my peopil's.
Speaker 1 (03:00):
I would love to go somewhere, you know, West coast,
because I've only been to California.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
I love San Diego.
Speaker 1 (03:07):
That's the only place I've been.
Speaker 2 (03:09):
It's funny.
Speaker 3 (03:09):
I was talking to my friend about our March break
and They're like, what are you doing? I was like,
I don't have anything plan yet, and then we were
talking about I really want to go in and out.
I have been in out in forever well since the
last time went to I went to San Diego, and
the closest one is Dallas, Texas.
Speaker 2 (03:23):
So I've been to Dallas.
Speaker 3 (03:24):
A handful of times too. I had, you know, I
had my little before I had my lat of Dale days.
I had my Dallas days.
Speaker 2 (03:29):
But I went on the radio here when that happened.
Speaker 3 (03:32):
So there was a time where I went to Dallas
I think five or six times in like maybe like
two years. Big fan of when you get like you're
not far from in and out when you get off
the airplane. So I was like, either we go to
Dallas for a few days or San Diego for a
few days so I can go to fucking in and out.
So I was thinking about that, and they were like,
I don't want to go to La or San Francisco.
(03:52):
I got I say, I didn't say. I got in
and say that. I said California.
Speaker 1 (03:55):
I go.
Speaker 3 (03:55):
When I say California, I mean San Diego. I've actually
never been to San Francisco or La. I went to
Lax to go to Disneyland, and that was it. I've
never actually spent any time in La. To me, California,
San Diego.
Speaker 1 (04:06):
San Diego. That's the only place I've.
Speaker 2 (04:07):
Been on this beautiful place in the world.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
Amazing, yeah, amazing, perfect weather. Did you ever drive over
the Coronado Yes, beautiful bridge.
Speaker 3 (04:14):
My cousin got married in Coronado Park that overlooks San Diego.
So she got married right there in the city. Sky
was behind them, and then their reception was at this
place that overlooked the San Diego park of the baseball team,
the Padres Park.
Speaker 1 (04:30):
Oh yeah, I saw that. Yeah, we had a great
time there. I want to hear San Diego story. So
when I like, when I talk about my recovery and
stuff my story, I always throw this in when I'm
telling my extended story, like I'm speaking somewhere. So okay,
So not in recovery, they have what's called steps, the
twelve steps that I've done it, I've done them all,
(04:53):
but you you repeat them, you repeat them. So now
that so you've I'm on step two, I've already.
Speaker 2 (04:58):
Got Yeah, you must have gone through it like twenty times.
Speaker 1 (05:01):
I've gone through once, the whole twelve They take a
lot of time.
Speaker 3 (05:04):
Wait, it took you fifteen years to go through twelve steps.
Speaker 1 (05:08):
Yeah, it's a lot of life.
Speaker 2 (05:10):
Got back over again. Yeah, So what step is two?
Speaker 1 (05:13):
Well you have well one is your powerless Yeah right,
then it's you know, I came to believe that apolygrand
in ourselves, resource and sanity. Then three who made a
decisions are not willing our lives. It's yeah, yeah, so.
Speaker 3 (05:23):
You were at one again after you've been clean for
fifteen years.
Speaker 1 (05:26):
Yes, because you don't apply it to drugs anymore. You
apply it to new things in your life. The reason
that you repeat it is because life keeps going so
the steps aren't just designed to go to it. It's not
about the drugs.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
It's about the addiction twelve step program.
Speaker 1 (05:40):
Yes, that's how it goes. Okay, Yeah, so.
Speaker 2 (05:42):
Anyway with that was marketing genius.
Speaker 1 (05:44):
Yeah. So Step four is the hard one because that's
the one you it's the longest you take an inventory
on yourself. You have to really look at all the
nasty stuff that you did, and you have to tell
it to another person. So it's very hard. A lot
of people don't make it through step four.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
Your Step four person, when you get there.
Speaker 1 (06:03):
Well, I already did it.
Speaker 2 (06:03):
Are you sure you're doing it the end?
Speaker 1 (06:05):
Yeah, but it's gonna be different this time because I've
already gotten rid of a lot of the garbage.
Speaker 2 (06:09):
And who decides when you're done with one step?
Speaker 1 (06:11):
Your sponsor, Well, there's a book you go through. There's
a book that you there's a there's a whole outline
that you follow. So when you do step four, and
that's the hard one, but that's it's also a turning
point in your life.
Speaker 2 (06:22):
How long did it take you to a couple of years?
Speaker 1 (06:25):
Yeah, it's a lot, but you're going through all of
your relationships, all of your resentments, all of your sexual partners,
all the people that you hurt.
Speaker 2 (06:32):
Don't even remember any partners.
Speaker 1 (06:35):
That was a big one. So anyway, I was on
step four. I started it, and I was stalled. Okay.
Now what happens is when you stall in the middle
of an important step like that, you you have what's
called a cluttered spirit, meaning that like this chaos inside
of you because you haven't let it all out yet.
So I let out some of it, but there was
fear of doing it, so I was stalled for months, okay, months.
(06:57):
So we go to San Diego, a big world convention okay,
recovery convention. Okay, So it's Jen and I. We probably
have about three or four years clean each. Before we
booked the trip, they knew we were going, and someone
reached out to both of us and said, we are
going to submit your names to be speakers at the
world convention. This is a huge deal. So now me,
(07:19):
I'm like mister recovery man. At this point, I'm like
speaking everywhere. I'm like kind of a little celebrity almost
in my head. That's where I was at at that time.
And so when they told me that, I thought to myself,
this is it, this is my moment. No, no, yes,
I was. I was an intern, but I was like,
this is my moment. Okay. So months go by, a
few months go by. Now we're going in September. It's
(07:42):
probably May, right, I don't get a call. Jen gets
a call for her to speak at the convention, and
I thought to myself, all right, well, mine's my calls coming. Yeah,
well listen yeah, because I'm well, not not yet. I'm like, well,
my call's coming. Well my call never came, okay, So
in my head I didn't think to myself, you know,
(08:03):
what the fuck? But really that's what I was really feeling.
But I wasn't like really materializing that or whatever. So
when we went on the trip, she was very nervous.
So we get out there on a Friday. She was
speaking on a Saturday, and I was treating her like shit.
I was annoyed, and I didn't really I didn't fat justin,
fat justin why aren't I speaking again? Middle of a
(08:26):
fourth step? Really selfish? So we Friday night were fighting, okay,
and she's I remember looking at me like, why are
you being like this? Why are you treating me like this?
Why are you saying these things to me? And I
was like, ah, you know whatever. So Saturday comes, we're
in the room getting ready. She's so fucking nervous, okay,
and I'm like kind of calm down now, but I
(08:46):
was still kind of being a dicky. Her father passed
away from cancer many years ago, and his name was
Lou Lou g was his name. So that's who she
as is her like higher power, you know, It's like
she talked to her dad, yeah you know. So we
go down to the convention center that's where they have
comic com Yeah, big convention center. So we go down
(09:08):
there to the room. Yes, yeah, we're going down there,
and we're not even talking okay, and I'm like, I'm
like all fucked up. We get to the room where
she's speaking and on the front they have a marquee
that says who the speakers are. And we get down
there and look and she just like pauses and starts crying.
And I look and it says Jenji Luji on the thing.
Speaker 2 (09:31):
So there was some guy named Luke.
Speaker 1 (09:32):
Yeah, that was who she was speaking with. Yeah. Why
And in that moment, it like hit me and I
was like I am the biggest fucking piece of shit
of all time?
Speaker 2 (09:43):
You are.
Speaker 1 (09:44):
Yeah. So she spoke, she did a beautiful job. It
was amazing. It was a guy from Chicago a yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:51):
So it's just like their last name initial.
Speaker 1 (09:53):
Yeah, just the initial yeah. So isn't that crazy?
Speaker 3 (09:55):
Though?
Speaker 1 (09:56):
And that's when it hit me? And these are the
moments that so then I I left it. I remember,
I called my guy and I go, we need to
do some work. And when I got back, I started
writing and I got through it and I kept going
and who I was able to make that change? Yeah,
isn't that crazy?
Speaker 2 (10:10):
My god? That's a spiritual awakening.
Speaker 1 (10:12):
It really was. You know, here's the here's the here's
the the ironic part of that wanting to be Because
what happens is you go from having nothing right to
being in a recovery community and then you start being
asked to speak and you start thinking like you're somebody.
But here's the ironic part. You're famous in an anonymous program.
(10:33):
The program is anonymous.
Speaker 2 (10:35):
That's the last nameswer g.
Speaker 1 (10:36):
Yeah, think about name. Yeah. So it's like here I am.
I want to be this big celebrity, you know, And
you know what's funny is I always wanted to speak
at a convention, but I never got asked. Right. And
then as the years went by and I stopped caring
about that, and I started to really do work on myself,
I stopped caring. And once I stopped caring, I started
getting asked. Yeah, you know, it's funny how that works.
Speaker 2 (10:58):
What a good story?
Speaker 1 (10:59):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (11:00):
Yeah, So we we back to we don't have any
July vacations anymore. Yes, so, but March, I like, look, Ke,
you want to go in and out somehow, some way,
I might just I might just fly to Dallas for
one night to get in and out. They also have
this place in them in their mall that's Cheesecake Factory
adjacent I forget the name of it. It's uh, it's
(11:21):
the same company as Cheesecake Factory. It has the exact
same feel, but it's not called cheetcake Factory.
Speaker 2 (11:27):
And it's so good. I'm gonna look it up right now.
Speaker 3 (11:30):
Dallas Mall, Gallery of Mallah at the Gallery Mall, and
they have bread.
Speaker 2 (11:35):
They have the same like kind of vibe, like the look, and.
Speaker 3 (11:41):
I gotta find the name of it. It is so good.
I want to go there too. The Grand Lux look Okay,
look at it. Does it not look like a cheesecake fatory?
They have the bestignets?
Speaker 2 (11:54):
Does that not give? Is that not cheesta factory?
Speaker 1 (11:56):
It looks like it to me?
Speaker 3 (11:57):
Yeah, so like even look at the like, m yeah,
it's told cheesecake factory vibes.
Speaker 2 (12:03):
I think they're the same company.
Speaker 1 (12:04):
We're going to American Dream in Jersey, which into a park,
and so that's what we gave Abele for his birthday.
Because it's so close to Christmas, we don't get gifts
we get We bought them an experience. So we're all
going to to there. And you know what this little
bastard said when we showed them the pictures, he goes,
oh my god, New York, New Jersey showed them the pictures.
It's like, wow, that's cool. Then he goes, how long
does it take to get there? And we're like driving
(12:25):
where we're driving, so it's eight hours, No New Jersey
four hours.
Speaker 2 (12:30):
I'm like, I don't think I'm like Maryland, So I'm
like four hours.
Speaker 1 (12:33):
He goes, you know, he doesn't like driving in the car,
so there's gonna be a lot of are we there yet?
For sure? Anyway, when he it's Friday, can we please leave?
I want to get out of here.
Speaker 2 (12:43):
I have Oh my god, I hate people.
Speaker 1 (12:45):
No long weekend, this weekend. I know what's the matter.
Speaker 3 (12:49):
Everyone thinks that I'm Billy's which I low cam. I'm
the producer. But like when it comes to social media, like,
I'm not getting paid extra for you to fucking keep
emailing me and texting me and calling.
Speaker 1 (12:59):
You know what the issue is of that is that
that's what you were doing. That's because that's what you're
known as.
Speaker 2 (13:05):
Forbid.
Speaker 3 (13:05):
These sales will get me my own accounts. They just
see ask me to help them abilities accounts.
Speaker 1 (13:08):
I just like when they don't email me. You know,
I don't know, all right, you know what, you know what?
You know what you need to do to a fourth step.
Put that salesperson on your fourth step. You want your name, No,
don't say her name anyway, guys, have a great weekend
and we'll talk again on Monday.
I love a short week, since the three day weekends
just make the week so much better, so much shorter
and so nice. We're already at Friday winning.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
I can't believe it.
Speaker 1 (00:09):
I know it's I love it. I just why can't
we do more of that? I mean what we could
do is instead of having full weeks, we could take
more long weekends.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Oh with our vacations. Hm, we could do that. We don't.
Why don't we do that, like one of the week's
out of the four?
Speaker 1 (00:26):
Well?
Speaker 2 (00:26):
Save up?
Speaker 1 (00:27):
Yeah, Romeo that used to work here in the afternoons
for many years. He's a jetbo pilot. Now. When I
first got on Kiss, before I was on the morning show,
I used to do Seacrest and he would come on
after me, so I would stay and hang out with him.
And this motherfucker was always off. Yeah, this dude had
and it was a running joke, how much vacation time
does this guy have?
Speaker 2 (00:45):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (00:45):
And one day I just asked them, I go, dude,
do you like have ten weeks of vacation? And he
explained it to me. He goes, no, I don't take
any full weeks yep.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
So he probably I wish we did it that way.
Speaker 1 (00:55):
Well, if you think about it, right, I think he
probably has you know, say he has four weeks vacation,
he might negotia like a fifth week because he's been
here so long. So that's twenty five days and then
you add on like a personal day, so you're looking
at twenty five to thirty days off. So that's twenty
five to thirty weekends of long weekends.
Speaker 3 (01:12):
Okay, but you know what, like what we could do
like on for instance, this one, right, we could have
taken Friday off, make it a four day for day,
or Thursday Friday Monday five days.
Speaker 1 (01:21):
You know what I was thinking? What do you think
about So Juneteenth we have off, it's on a Wednesday,
which is a little weird. What if the fourth of
July is on a Friday? Okay? What if we work
the juneteenth and trade it for the Thursday, so we're
actually off the third fourth, and then the next week
because our vacation is the week after the fourth. Oh,
(01:43):
so we'd extend our vacation by an extra day.
Speaker 2 (01:45):
Well, it wouldn't matter because we're not going anywhere.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
No, yeah we will. We had chips planned, but that's gone.
Speaker 2 (01:53):
We're not going.
Speaker 3 (01:53):
Anywhere, so does it really matter. Yeah, it doesn't matter
to me. I'm not doing anything as of you. I
gotta find out a whole newcation plan.
Speaker 1 (02:00):
I think I think we shot a little bit too
high on that. You know, it's a it's a very
it's it's like a once in a lifetime trip, but
it's a lot, it's a lot of money.
Speaker 3 (02:09):
It wasn't planned the most proper way. I would have
planned it differently.
Speaker 1 (02:13):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (02:13):
And you know what's funny is I literally said I
wanted to do it a certain way, and they didn't
listen to me.
Speaker 2 (02:19):
And I said, if they listened to me, it might
have been better.
Speaker 1 (02:21):
Well, the good news is that those trips were canceled,
but they are looking at different ones, maybe more in
the United States, maybe something you know, right, more affordable. Listen,
it costs money to go to these places, man, you know,
it does a lot of money. And it was an
eight day trip, by.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
The way, I would have been cool with a five
day or so.
Speaker 1 (02:39):
That's they're they're in talks to either shorten it or
change the destination. Yeah, which which would be fine. You know,
I'll go anywhere. I don't care. I mean, I like Florida.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
Hey, listen. You know me, I'll go to for listen.
Speaker 3 (02:51):
I could go to Fort Laarao deo right and give
you my own fucking tour. I know that Plutus with
the back of my hand. I love Fort l I
would love do for deal with my peopil's.
Speaker 1 (03:00):
I would love to go somewhere, you know, West coast,
because I've only been to California.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
I love San Diego.
Speaker 1 (03:07):
That's the only place I've been.
Speaker 2 (03:09):
It's funny.
Speaker 3 (03:09):
I was talking to my friend about our March break
and They're like, what are you doing? I was like,
I don't have anything plan yet, and then we were
talking about I really want to go in and out.
I have been in out in forever well since the
last time went to I went to San Diego, and
the closest one is Dallas, Texas.
Speaker 2 (03:23):
So I've been to Dallas.
Speaker 3 (03:24):
A handful of times too. I had, you know, I
had my little before I had my lat of Dale days.
I had my Dallas days.
Speaker 2 (03:29):
But I went on the radio here when that happened.
Speaker 3 (03:32):
So there was a time where I went to Dallas
I think five or six times in like maybe like
two years. Big fan of when you get like you're
not far from in and out when you get off
the airplane. So I was like, either we go to
Dallas for a few days or San Diego for a
few days so I can go to fucking in and out.
So I was thinking about that, and they were like,
I don't want to go to La or San Francisco.
(03:52):
I got I say, I didn't say. I got in
and say that. I said California.
Speaker 1 (03:55):
I go.
Speaker 3 (03:55):
When I say California, I mean San Diego. I've actually
never been to San Francisco or La. I went to
Lax to go to Disneyland, and that was it. I've
never actually spent any time in La. To me, California,
San Diego.
Speaker 1 (04:06):
San Diego. That's the only place I've.
Speaker 2 (04:07):
Been on this beautiful place in the world.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
Amazing, yeah, amazing, perfect weather. Did you ever drive over
the Coronado Yes, beautiful bridge.
Speaker 3 (04:14):
My cousin got married in Coronado Park that overlooks San Diego.
So she got married right there in the city. Sky
was behind them, and then their reception was at this
place that overlooked the San Diego park of the baseball team,
the Padres Park.
Speaker 1 (04:30):
Oh yeah, I saw that. Yeah, we had a great
time there. I want to hear San Diego story. So
when I like, when I talk about my recovery and
stuff my story, I always throw this in when I'm
telling my extended story, like I'm speaking somewhere. So okay,
So not in recovery, they have what's called steps, the
twelve steps that I've done it, I've done them all,
(04:53):
but you you repeat them, you repeat them. So now
that so you've I'm on step two, I've already.
Speaker 2 (04:58):
Got Yeah, you must have gone through it like twenty times.
Speaker 1 (05:01):
I've gone through once, the whole twelve They take a
lot of time.
Speaker 3 (05:04):
Wait, it took you fifteen years to go through twelve steps.
Speaker 1 (05:08):
Yeah, it's a lot of life.
Speaker 2 (05:10):
Got back over again. Yeah, So what step is two?
Speaker 1 (05:13):
Well you have well one is your powerless Yeah right,
then it's you know, I came to believe that apolygrand
in ourselves, resource and sanity. Then three who made a
decisions are not willing our lives. It's yeah, yeah, so.
Speaker 3 (05:23):
You were at one again after you've been clean for
fifteen years.
Speaker 1 (05:26):
Yes, because you don't apply it to drugs anymore. You
apply it to new things in your life. The reason
that you repeat it is because life keeps going so
the steps aren't just designed to go to it. It's not
about the drugs.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
It's about the addiction twelve step program.
Speaker 1 (05:40):
Yes, that's how it goes. Okay, Yeah, so.
Speaker 2 (05:42):
Anyway with that was marketing genius.
Speaker 1 (05:44):
Yeah. So Step four is the hard one because that's
the one you it's the longest you take an inventory
on yourself. You have to really look at all the
nasty stuff that you did, and you have to tell
it to another person. So it's very hard. A lot
of people don't make it through step four.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
Your Step four person, when you get there.
Speaker 1 (06:03):
Well, I already did it.
Speaker 2 (06:03):
Are you sure you're doing it the end?
Speaker 1 (06:05):
Yeah, but it's gonna be different this time because I've
already gotten rid of a lot of the garbage.
Speaker 2 (06:09):
And who decides when you're done with one step?
Speaker 1 (06:11):
Your sponsor, Well, there's a book you go through. There's
a book that you there's a there's a whole outline
that you follow. So when you do step four, and
that's the hard one, but that's it's also a turning
point in your life.
Speaker 2 (06:22):
How long did it take you to a couple of years?
Speaker 1 (06:25):
Yeah, it's a lot, but you're going through all of
your relationships, all of your resentments, all of your sexual partners,
all the people that you hurt.
Speaker 2 (06:32):
Don't even remember any partners.
Speaker 1 (06:35):
That was a big one. So anyway, I was on
step four. I started it, and I was stalled. Okay.
Now what happens is when you stall in the middle
of an important step like that, you you have what's
called a cluttered spirit, meaning that like this chaos inside
of you because you haven't let it all out yet.
So I let out some of it, but there was
fear of doing it, so I was stalled for months, okay, months.
(06:57):
So we go to San Diego, a big world convention okay,
recovery convention. Okay, So it's Jen and I. We probably
have about three or four years clean each. Before we
booked the trip, they knew we were going, and someone
reached out to both of us and said, we are
going to submit your names to be speakers at the
world convention. This is a huge deal. So now me,
(07:19):
I'm like mister recovery man. At this point, I'm like
speaking everywhere. I'm like kind of a little celebrity almost
in my head. That's where I was at at that time.
And so when they told me that, I thought to myself,
this is it, this is my moment. No, no, yes,
I was. I was an intern, but I was like,
this is my moment. Okay. So months go by, a
few months go by. Now we're going in September. It's
(07:42):
probably May, right, I don't get a call. Jen gets
a call for her to speak at the convention, and
I thought to myself, all right, well, mine's my calls coming. Yeah,
well listen yeah, because I'm well, not not yet. I'm like, well,
my call's coming. Well my call never came, okay, So
in my head I didn't think to myself, you know,
(08:03):
what the fuck? But really that's what I was really feeling.
But I wasn't like really materializing that or whatever. So
when we went on the trip, she was very nervous.
So we get out there on a Friday. She was
speaking on a Saturday, and I was treating her like shit.
I was annoyed, and I didn't really I didn't fat justin,
fat justin why aren't I speaking again? Middle of a
(08:26):
fourth step? Really selfish? So we Friday night were fighting, okay,
and she's I remember looking at me like, why are
you being like this? Why are you treating me like this?
Why are you saying these things to me? And I
was like, ah, you know whatever. So Saturday comes, we're
in the room getting ready. She's so fucking nervous, okay,
and I'm like kind of calm down now, but I
(08:46):
was still kind of being a dicky. Her father passed
away from cancer many years ago, and his name was
Lou Lou g was his name. So that's who she
as is her like higher power, you know, It's like
she talked to her dad, yeah you know. So we
go down to the convention center that's where they have
comic com Yeah, big convention center. So we go down
(09:08):
there to the room. Yes, yeah, we're going down there,
and we're not even talking okay, and I'm like, I'm
like all fucked up. We get to the room where
she's speaking and on the front they have a marquee
that says who the speakers are. And we get down
there and look and she just like pauses and starts crying.
And I look and it says Jenji Luji on the thing.
Speaker 2 (09:31):
So there was some guy named Luke.
Speaker 1 (09:32):
Yeah, that was who she was speaking with. Yeah. Why
And in that moment, it like hit me and I
was like I am the biggest fucking piece of shit
of all time?
Speaker 2 (09:43):
You are.
Speaker 1 (09:44):
Yeah. So she spoke, she did a beautiful job. It
was amazing. It was a guy from Chicago a yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:51):
So it's just like their last name initial.
Speaker 1 (09:53):
Yeah, just the initial yeah. So isn't that crazy?
Speaker 3 (09:55):
Though?
Speaker 1 (09:56):
And that's when it hit me? And these are the
moments that so then I I left it. I remember,
I called my guy and I go, we need to
do some work. And when I got back, I started
writing and I got through it and I kept going
and who I was able to make that change? Yeah,
isn't that crazy?
Speaker 2 (10:10):
My god? That's a spiritual awakening.
Speaker 1 (10:12):
It really was. You know, here's the here's the here's
the the ironic part of that wanting to be Because
what happens is you go from having nothing right to
being in a recovery community and then you start being
asked to speak and you start thinking like you're somebody.
But here's the ironic part. You're famous in an anonymous program.
(10:33):
The program is anonymous.
Speaker 2 (10:35):
That's the last nameswer g.
Speaker 1 (10:36):
Yeah, think about name. Yeah. So it's like here I am.
I want to be this big celebrity, you know, And
you know what's funny is I always wanted to speak
at a convention, but I never got asked. Right. And
then as the years went by and I stopped caring
about that, and I started to really do work on myself,
I stopped caring. And once I stopped caring, I started
getting asked. Yeah, you know, it's funny how that works.
Speaker 2 (10:58):
What a good story?
Speaker 1 (10:59):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (11:00):
Yeah, So we we back to we don't have any
July vacations anymore. Yes, so, but March, I like, look, Ke,
you want to go in and out somehow, some way,
I might just I might just fly to Dallas for
one night to get in and out. They also have
this place in them in their mall that's Cheesecake Factory
adjacent I forget the name of it. It's uh, it's
(11:21):
the same company as Cheesecake Factory. It has the exact
same feel, but it's not called cheetcake Factory.
Speaker 2 (11:27):
And it's so good. I'm gonna look it up right now.
Speaker 3 (11:30):
Dallas Mall, Gallery of Mallah at the Gallery Mall, and
they have bread.
Speaker 2 (11:35):
They have the same like kind of vibe, like the look, and.
Speaker 3 (11:41):
I gotta find the name of it. It is so good.
I want to go there too. The Grand Lux look Okay,
look at it. Does it not look like a cheesecake fatory?
They have the bestignets?
Speaker 2 (11:54):
Does that not give? Is that not cheesta factory?
Speaker 1 (11:56):
It looks like it to me?
Speaker 3 (11:57):
Yeah, so like even look at the like, m yeah,
it's told cheesecake factory vibes.
Speaker 2 (12:03):
I think they're the same company.
Speaker 1 (12:04):
We're going to American Dream in Jersey, which into a park,
and so that's what we gave Abele for his birthday.
Because it's so close to Christmas, we don't get gifts
we get We bought them an experience. So we're all
going to to there. And you know what this little
bastard said when we showed them the pictures, he goes,
oh my god, New York, New Jersey showed them the pictures.
It's like, wow, that's cool. Then he goes, how long
does it take to get there? And we're like driving
(12:25):
where we're driving, so it's eight hours, No New Jersey
four hours.
Speaker 2 (12:30):
I'm like, I don't think I'm like Maryland, So I'm
like four hours.
Speaker 1 (12:33):
He goes, you know, he doesn't like driving in the car,
so there's gonna be a lot of are we there yet?
For sure? Anyway, when he it's Friday, can we please leave?
I want to get out of here.
Speaker 2 (12:43):
I have Oh my god, I hate people.
Speaker 1 (12:45):
No long weekend, this weekend. I know what's the matter.
Speaker 3 (12:49):
Everyone thinks that I'm Billy's which I low cam. I'm
the producer. But like when it comes to social media, like,
I'm not getting paid extra for you to fucking keep
emailing me and texting me and calling.
Speaker 1 (12:59):
You know what the issue is of that is that
that's what you were doing. That's because that's what you're
known as.
Speaker 2 (13:05):
Forbid.
Speaker 3 (13:05):
These sales will get me my own accounts. They just
see ask me to help them abilities accounts.
Speaker 1 (13:08):
I just like when they don't email me. You know,
I don't know, all right, you know what, you know what?
You know what you need to do to a fourth step.
Put that salesperson on your fourth step. You want your name, No,
don't say her name anyway, guys, have a great weekend
and we'll talk again on Monday.
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