March 18, 2023 • 14 mins
OUTWEIGH: Amy sat down to chat with Leanne Ellington about the 'why behind the what' of our 'animal brain'!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
I won't let my body out way outweigh everything that
I'm made do, won't spend my life trying to change.
I'm learning to love who I am again. I'm strong,
I feel free, I know who every part of me.
It's beautiful and done will always outway if you feel
(00:24):
it with your hands and the here she's some love
to the boom by a day. Let's say good day
and time did you and die out? Happy Saturday. Outweigh
Amy here and my expert guest today is Leanne Ellington.
She's a self image scientist and cookie lover. I love
(00:47):
her bio. She's been on the podcast before, so you
may recall she was on Outweigh and Four Things Yeah
Done both and she's going to be a part of
the Four Things Live that's going down here in Nashville.
And I love your knowledge of the brain and why
we behave the way we behave. You give us the why,
(01:07):
and I feel like it's really important for us to
understand the why because then we realize, oh, I'm not
crazy for thinking this way about myself or behaving this way.
My brain is simply just trying to take care of me.
And so that's what we're going to talk about today
is our brains. What our brains are doing for us,
(01:28):
especially like for me in particularly in whenever I was
starting my recovery journey from binge eating, I read a
book called Brain over Binge, and that's the first time
I was introduced to the animal brain. And that was
her way of the simple way of putting it. That
part of my brain that was helping me survive because
I had starved myself for so long I had would
(01:51):
restrict and so then that led to my body not
trusting me and my brain not knowing when I was
ever going to give it food again. So therefore it
would eat eat, eat, eat eat because it's like, oh,
I don't know when this person is going to feed
me again. And then that that created that pattern, and
so every time I would go to the pantry, my
animal brain was in charge. But the cool part is
(02:11):
once I realized that I was able to take control
and be like, oh no, no, no, animal brain not today.
And that is what you're going to talk about today,
is like the meat of that Yeah, absolutely, yeah, And
I think you said it so well. It's like we
judge what we don't understand, and in that area that
we don't understand about ourselves. That's where usually the shame lives,
(02:31):
and we make meaning that I'm crazy or there's something
wrong with me, or I'm air quotes broken or whatever
we say. And that's why I get so passionate about
sharing the why behind the what, because, as you know
you've shared before, my struggle ran so deep and until
I understood why I do, why I did what I did,
I just put myself in those categories that had shame
(02:51):
stories around it. So I think it's so important. But
also the cool thing is once we understand it and
we see that it's really just like a mechanism, it's
almost like a system that's kind of been running our
life for us. We can look at it and then
understand how to take back the power from it and
learn how to have it be our best friend and
be our superpower when we know how to manage it
(03:12):
and influence it rather than having it control us. And
so when you say best friend, what do you mean
by that? Yeah? So you know, people often ask me like,
what do you mean when you say rewire the brain?
Because one of the things I always say is and
it just came from my own experiences, like It wasn't
a food thing, it wasn't a motivation or willpower thing.
My brain was doing the doing for me. And it
(03:35):
didn't matter how many diets I went on or failed,
And it didn't matter, you know, all of the positive
motivation I told myself. My brain still was doing its
own thing and its own pattern making and meaning making
and acting. And so, you know, the best description of
it was doctor Stephen Peters in the Chimp paradox. You know,
(03:56):
like in basically our brains share a very milar structure
with that of the chimpanzee brain, but specifically when it
comes to that impulse control, and so a lot of
times that is the part of our brain that's associated
with us thinking that we're weak willed, thinking that we're
not motivated enough, thinking that we're a failure, and that
becomes ingrained in our self image. So first and foremost,
(04:18):
just acknowledging, Wow, I have this chimp brain up there,
and she's untamed, she's uncontrolled, she's running around, she's probably
a little mischievous, and she is what is, you know,
doing the doing, eating, the eating, binging, the binging. Right,
So acknowledging that and that we can actually train her,
(04:39):
and we can tame her, and we can show her
the ropes, these new ropes, you know, so to speak,
and really just take back power from that now obviously
it's beyond the scope of this chat right now, but
that that is even possible, that in itself, to me,
it is power and knowing that it doesn't just have
to be this way for the rest of our lives
and we're not death to stay stuck in these patterns.
(05:01):
Just knowing that. And then the other side of that
is obviously that it's kind of like the cousin of it,
or that really seals the deal. Is is the self image,
you know, because you can have all of the impulse
control and self control that you could possibly have, but
if your self image is spinning stories of you know,
the ones we talked about like this is who you are,
(05:22):
this is who you'll always be, or labeling your things
like unlovable, unworthy, fat, whatever we say to ourselves. Right,
it doesn't matter how you know self disciplined you are,
it's going to become a self fulfilling prophecy. You'll always
step into your self image and unfortunately you'll never outsmart
or out diet or outstrategize your self image. So when
(05:46):
I say rewire the brain, it's got to be both, right,
So you definitely need to tame that chimp. And really
that's befriending it. Yeah, knowing like this is this funny
part of me come yet and it's not that it's
going to magically go away and stop. So what if
we just acknowledge, like, this is the part of me
that's happening, and I'm going to radically commit to learning
how to tame it, so to speak, and become this conscious,
(06:09):
mindful decision maker rather than having these feeling like these
decisions are being made for me or choices being taken
away from me. Right, So really, just like again, knowing
that it's not going away, but how can I become
friends with it rather than thinking it's my worst enemy
or that I'm a self sabotager. Right. I like the
idea of becoming friends with it. I had not thought
of it that way before. I sort of was annoyed
(06:31):
by it and hated it and it was frustrated. I
was like, oh, I think befriending it gives you more
compassion for yourself because it is part of you. But
at the same time, if you picture it is that
and you become friends with it and you're like, hey, buddy,
I know you're trying to do your best to take
care of me right now, but we're spinning a little
out of control, and there's another way, so come on
(06:54):
join me over here, and then that part can sort
of calm down instead of having such anger towards it.
Frustration exactly because the resent conversation of like, man, this
is this part of my brain that I have no
control over, or we you know, we label it as
bad or whatever. It's arguing with reality. You know. In Buying,
Katie says, when you argue with reality, you suffer. So
(07:14):
you're literally just like creating suffering around something that is right.
But when we look at it, acknowledge it and be like, hey,
I don't have to like this part of my brain
is doing its thing without me. But if I can
just accept that it is, like, this is what's happening.
So what if I looked at it like, Okay, I'm
I'm gonna take it on and I'm gonna befriended and
make peace with it and accept first and foremost, just
(07:34):
accept that this is what's happening. It completely changes the
tone and reframes it because yeah, it's no longer this
enemy that you have to you know, defeat, because that
puts you in that fight mentality. Now it's just something like, Okay,
now I know the reality of it, and I can
actually act accordingly and take power from it and empower
myself to influence it, rather than feel like it's an
(07:55):
enemy that I have to avoid or you know, stuff
down or be mad at. You mentioned acknowledging it being
the first step. What's another step that we can take
to tame it? Or what are some examples of taming it?
Because that's great? Should I hear that? And someone listening
might be like, Okay, great, now I know that there's
hope I can do this. She's telling me I can.
It is possible, and I'm aware of it. So I'm
(08:18):
acknowledging it. But what's the one thing maybe I can
try to start doing today, Yeah, to tame her? Yeah,
And it's it's such a such a little question, and
there's so many different things. Yeah, whichever the case, Maybe
chimp exactly exactly, however, you're chimp identifying right exactly. We
are all we love all chimps around here. So you know,
(08:40):
the first step would be I call it an awareness awareness, right,
which is just having the awareness that you have the
ability to have an awareness of something. So for example,
people listening today might not realize they have this chimp
that is in charge of their impulse control or a
lot of times it feels like lack thereof right, And
so having this awareness that you have the ability to
(09:01):
even influence a chimp in your brain and befriend it
is a step, right, the awareness to have the awareness,
you know. And then you know the first thing that
like the pause, right, the mindfulness, the taking a breath
even and again I know some of these things that
we hear it's like, okay, that's easier said than done, right,
but everybody can just taken an inhalation and an exhalation,
(09:23):
one breath, you know, and even you know, one of
the things I teach is this idea of kind of
future pacing and reverse engineering. And again this might go
beyond the scope of today, but this idea of like
you know, drawing that line in the sand first and foremost,
and even just saying you know what, like I'm not
going to fight this anymore. I'm not gonna make myself wrong.
(09:43):
I'm just going to acknowledge that this is the part
of me, So, you know, the acceptance of what is
It might sound like such a small step, but just
being able to accept that this is what's happening and
that I want to influence it that has to be
the first step before you go transform anything, in my opinion,
you know, so that like radical acceptance of this is
what is in acknowledging. Hey, I don't have to like it.
(10:05):
It might outright stink right now, but just knowing like
this is what's happening and accepting it, and then even
just one breath, one inhalation, one exhalation is enough to
put you in the parasympathetic branch of your nervous system,
and that's what's going to give you a gateway to
even be able to make a conscious decision next. I
love the pause, and we'll talk more later about parasympathetic.
(10:29):
I feel like it's something that has come up on
the podcast in previous episodes, but you could also just
google it too, and you can learn the two different types,
the sympathetic and the parasympathetic, and what's happening in your
brain and how you can actually put yourself in it,
like you said, with the breathwork, with meditation, with journaling.
We were just talking about this. We were at Restore.
(10:50):
We were I do cryotherapy. Lean and I were both
there and this football player like walked in and he's like,
oh man, I love cryotherapy. A big tough guy, and
he's talking about how in the morning he does his meditation,
his journaling to get his mind right because he knows
that's going to set him up for a successful day.
So even as a pro athlete, he knows what's up
because he knows he's got to get his head right.
(11:12):
And so wherever you are, which most of us are
not pro athletes, but what we got to set ourselves
up for the day, Like we're on a mission. We
have a mission. And if you're listening to this right now,
you're either on a mission to help someone that you
know and love that potentially has a needing disorder and
disordered eating, or you're curious and you're listening for yourself,
or you know what's going on with yourself and you
(11:33):
are trying to gather all the tools and all the things.
But just know that that pause, that breath. I love
that you said that, and that's a simple thing to
take away because it is so much more complex than
just this. There's a bajillion different steps, but that's a
great place to start, is the breath. And for me,
every time I would go to that pantry, I was
rewiring my brain. I would she would encourage me. Okay,
(11:55):
that's your animal brain wanting to go to the pantry
to binge. So go look at the door, turn around,
walk away. You might have to look at the door,
turn around, and walk away five hundred times. But every
time you turn around and don't give in, you are
training the brain. Absolutely, So we're training our chimp. Every
time you take that pause, you take that breath, and
you don't give in to whatever the behavior is set
(12:18):
for mine. It could be for you, could be that.
You know, maybe you're turning to a glass of wine
every night. Can we pause and not give in to
that or binging on you know, Netflix or shopping or
whatever it is. So I know there's so much more
to it. So thank you for giving us a simple
step to begin with there, lean and it's it's very helpful.
And just know, I think the big takeaway here is
(12:40):
and what we're all about here at always that there's
hope and you're not alone. Absolutely yeah, And even just
these conversations, the studies show that awareness of a problem
is enough to create a pattern interrupt in your brain
to take that next step. So even just awareness and
having these heightened levels and these conversations that you're even
having here is helping. It might not see like these
big dramatic steps, but it counts. It matters. It's a
(13:03):
step forward. You're weekly dose aboutweigh or what other things
you're the books you're reading, the other podcasts you're listening to,
the conversations you're having with friends, with your therapist. All
those things are disrupting. And so that's why even without
Way it's a quick Saturday episode, I keep them ten
to fifteen minutes. I want it to be digestible. I
don't want it to be something that overwhelms you. I
(13:24):
want it to be that weekly pick me up of
encouragement or hope or someone just coming alongside you and
knowing that hey, we're all trying to figure this out
and then bringing experts on that can help help guide us.
So thank you Leanne for coming on today for those
for the weekly outwagh pick me up. Yes, I love it.
I would be a part of it. Which lean Where
can people find you? Yeah? Absolutely, you can just go
(13:46):
to Stressless Eating dot com. There's a ton of coal
resources for you to just get more awareness and really
help set yourself free. Awesome and I am at radio
Amy on Instagram. You can find links there for everything.
Also Amy dot com. I m hm
I won't let my body out way outweigh everything that
I'm made do, won't spend my life trying to change.
I'm learning to love who I am again. I'm strong,
I feel free, I know who every part of me.
It's beautiful and done will always outway if you feel
(00:24):
it with your hands and the here she's some love
to the boom by a day. Let's say good day
and time did you and die out? Happy Saturday. Outweigh
Amy here and my expert guest today is Leanne Ellington.
She's a self image scientist and cookie lover. I love
(00:47):
her bio. She's been on the podcast before, so you
may recall she was on Outweigh and Four Things Yeah
Done both and she's going to be a part of
the Four Things Live that's going down here in Nashville.
And I love your knowledge of the brain and why
we behave the way we behave. You give us the why,
(01:07):
and I feel like it's really important for us to
understand the why because then we realize, oh, I'm not
crazy for thinking this way about myself or behaving this way.
My brain is simply just trying to take care of me.
And so that's what we're going to talk about today
is our brains. What our brains are doing for us,
(01:28):
especially like for me in particularly in whenever I was
starting my recovery journey from binge eating, I read a
book called Brain over Binge, and that's the first time
I was introduced to the animal brain. And that was
her way of the simple way of putting it. That
part of my brain that was helping me survive because
I had starved myself for so long I had would
(01:51):
restrict and so then that led to my body not
trusting me and my brain not knowing when I was
ever going to give it food again. So therefore it
would eat eat, eat, eat eat because it's like, oh,
I don't know when this person is going to feed
me again. And then that that created that pattern, and
so every time I would go to the pantry, my
animal brain was in charge. But the cool part is
(02:11):
once I realized that I was able to take control
and be like, oh no, no, no, animal brain not today.
And that is what you're going to talk about today,
is like the meat of that Yeah, absolutely, yeah, And
I think you said it so well. It's like we
judge what we don't understand, and in that area that
we don't understand about ourselves. That's where usually the shame lives,
(02:31):
and we make meaning that I'm crazy or there's something
wrong with me, or I'm air quotes broken or whatever
we say. And that's why I get so passionate about
sharing the why behind the what, because, as you know
you've shared before, my struggle ran so deep and until
I understood why I do, why I did what I did,
I just put myself in those categories that had shame
(02:51):
stories around it. So I think it's so important. But
also the cool thing is once we understand it and
we see that it's really just like a mechanism, it's
almost like a system that's kind of been running our
life for us. We can look at it and then
understand how to take back the power from it and
learn how to have it be our best friend and
be our superpower when we know how to manage it
(03:12):
and influence it rather than having it control us. And
so when you say best friend, what do you mean
by that? Yeah? So you know, people often ask me like,
what do you mean when you say rewire the brain?
Because one of the things I always say is and
it just came from my own experiences, like It wasn't
a food thing, it wasn't a motivation or willpower thing.
My brain was doing the doing for me. And it
(03:35):
didn't matter how many diets I went on or failed,
And it didn't matter, you know, all of the positive
motivation I told myself. My brain still was doing its
own thing and its own pattern making and meaning making
and acting. And so, you know, the best description of
it was doctor Stephen Peters in the Chimp paradox. You know,
(03:56):
like in basically our brains share a very milar structure
with that of the chimpanzee brain, but specifically when it
comes to that impulse control, and so a lot of
times that is the part of our brain that's associated
with us thinking that we're weak willed, thinking that we're
not motivated enough, thinking that we're a failure, and that
becomes ingrained in our self image. So first and foremost,
(04:18):
just acknowledging, Wow, I have this chimp brain up there,
and she's untamed, she's uncontrolled, she's running around, she's probably
a little mischievous, and she is what is, you know,
doing the doing, eating, the eating, binging, the binging. Right,
So acknowledging that and that we can actually train her,
(04:39):
and we can tame her, and we can show her
the ropes, these new ropes, you know, so to speak,
and really just take back power from that now obviously
it's beyond the scope of this chat right now, but
that that is even possible, that in itself, to me,
it is power and knowing that it doesn't just have
to be this way for the rest of our lives
and we're not death to stay stuck in these patterns.
(05:01):
Just knowing that. And then the other side of that
is obviously that it's kind of like the cousin of it,
or that really seals the deal. Is is the self image,
you know, because you can have all of the impulse
control and self control that you could possibly have, but
if your self image is spinning stories of you know,
the ones we talked about like this is who you are,
(05:22):
this is who you'll always be, or labeling your things
like unlovable, unworthy, fat, whatever we say to ourselves. Right,
it doesn't matter how you know self disciplined you are,
it's going to become a self fulfilling prophecy. You'll always
step into your self image and unfortunately you'll never outsmart
or out diet or outstrategize your self image. So when
(05:46):
I say rewire the brain, it's got to be both, right,
So you definitely need to tame that chimp. And really
that's befriending it. Yeah, knowing like this is this funny
part of me come yet and it's not that it's
going to magically go away and stop. So what if
we just acknowledge, like, this is the part of me
that's happening, and I'm going to radically commit to learning
how to tame it, so to speak, and become this conscious,
(06:09):
mindful decision maker rather than having these feeling like these
decisions are being made for me or choices being taken
away from me. Right, So really, just like again, knowing
that it's not going away, but how can I become
friends with it rather than thinking it's my worst enemy
or that I'm a self sabotager. Right. I like the
idea of becoming friends with it. I had not thought
of it that way before. I sort of was annoyed
(06:31):
by it and hated it and it was frustrated. I
was like, oh, I think befriending it gives you more
compassion for yourself because it is part of you. But
at the same time, if you picture it is that
and you become friends with it and you're like, hey, buddy,
I know you're trying to do your best to take
care of me right now, but we're spinning a little
out of control, and there's another way, so come on
(06:54):
join me over here, and then that part can sort
of calm down instead of having such anger towards it.
Frustration exactly because the resent conversation of like, man, this
is this part of my brain that I have no
control over, or we you know, we label it as
bad or whatever. It's arguing with reality. You know. In Buying,
Katie says, when you argue with reality, you suffer. So
(07:14):
you're literally just like creating suffering around something that is right.
But when we look at it, acknowledge it and be like, hey,
I don't have to like this part of my brain
is doing its thing without me. But if I can
just accept that it is, like, this is what's happening.
So what if I looked at it like, Okay, I'm
I'm gonna take it on and I'm gonna befriended and
make peace with it and accept first and foremost, just
(07:34):
accept that this is what's happening. It completely changes the
tone and reframes it because yeah, it's no longer this
enemy that you have to you know, defeat, because that
puts you in that fight mentality. Now it's just something like, Okay,
now I know the reality of it, and I can
actually act accordingly and take power from it and empower
myself to influence it, rather than feel like it's an
(07:55):
enemy that I have to avoid or you know, stuff
down or be mad at. You mentioned acknowledging it being
the first step. What's another step that we can take
to tame it? Or what are some examples of taming it?
Because that's great? Should I hear that? And someone listening
might be like, Okay, great, now I know that there's
hope I can do this. She's telling me I can.
It is possible, and I'm aware of it. So I'm
(08:18):
acknowledging it. But what's the one thing maybe I can
try to start doing today, Yeah, to tame her? Yeah,
And it's it's such a such a little question, and
there's so many different things. Yeah, whichever the case, Maybe
chimp exactly exactly, however, you're chimp identifying right exactly. We
are all we love all chimps around here. So you know,
(08:40):
the first step would be I call it an awareness awareness, right,
which is just having the awareness that you have the
ability to have an awareness of something. So for example,
people listening today might not realize they have this chimp
that is in charge of their impulse control or a
lot of times it feels like lack thereof right, And
so having this awareness that you have the ability to
(09:01):
even influence a chimp in your brain and befriend it
is a step, right, the awareness to have the awareness,
you know. And then you know the first thing that
like the pause, right, the mindfulness, the taking a breath
even and again I know some of these things that
we hear it's like, okay, that's easier said than done, right,
but everybody can just taken an inhalation and an exhalation,
(09:23):
one breath, you know, and even you know, one of
the things I teach is this idea of kind of
future pacing and reverse engineering. And again this might go
beyond the scope of today, but this idea of like
you know, drawing that line in the sand first and foremost,
and even just saying you know what, like I'm not
going to fight this anymore. I'm not gonna make myself wrong.
(09:43):
I'm just going to acknowledge that this is the part
of me, So, you know, the acceptance of what is
It might sound like such a small step, but just
being able to accept that this is what's happening and
that I want to influence it that has to be
the first step before you go transform anything, in my opinion,
you know, so that like radical acceptance of this is
what is in acknowledging. Hey, I don't have to like it.
(10:05):
It might outright stink right now, but just knowing like
this is what's happening and accepting it, and then even
just one breath, one inhalation, one exhalation is enough to
put you in the parasympathetic branch of your nervous system,
and that's what's going to give you a gateway to
even be able to make a conscious decision next. I
love the pause, and we'll talk more later about parasympathetic.
(10:29):
I feel like it's something that has come up on
the podcast in previous episodes, but you could also just
google it too, and you can learn the two different types,
the sympathetic and the parasympathetic, and what's happening in your
brain and how you can actually put yourself in it,
like you said, with the breathwork, with meditation, with journaling.
We were just talking about this. We were at Restore.
(10:50):
We were I do cryotherapy. Lean and I were both
there and this football player like walked in and he's like,
oh man, I love cryotherapy. A big tough guy, and
he's talking about how in the morning he does his meditation,
his journaling to get his mind right because he knows
that's going to set him up for a successful day.
So even as a pro athlete, he knows what's up
because he knows he's got to get his head right.
(11:12):
And so wherever you are, which most of us are
not pro athletes, but what we got to set ourselves
up for the day, Like we're on a mission. We
have a mission. And if you're listening to this right now,
you're either on a mission to help someone that you
know and love that potentially has a needing disorder and
disordered eating, or you're curious and you're listening for yourself,
or you know what's going on with yourself and you
(11:33):
are trying to gather all the tools and all the things.
But just know that that pause, that breath. I love
that you said that, and that's a simple thing to
take away because it is so much more complex than
just this. There's a bajillion different steps, but that's a
great place to start, is the breath. And for me,
every time I would go to that pantry, I was
rewiring my brain. I would she would encourage me. Okay,
(11:55):
that's your animal brain wanting to go to the pantry
to binge. So go look at the door, turn around,
walk away. You might have to look at the door,
turn around, and walk away five hundred times. But every
time you turn around and don't give in, you are
training the brain. Absolutely, So we're training our chimp. Every
time you take that pause, you take that breath, and
you don't give in to whatever the behavior is set
(12:18):
for mine. It could be for you, could be that.
You know, maybe you're turning to a glass of wine
every night. Can we pause and not give in to
that or binging on you know, Netflix or shopping or
whatever it is. So I know there's so much more
to it. So thank you for giving us a simple
step to begin with there, lean and it's it's very helpful.
And just know, I think the big takeaway here is
(12:40):
and what we're all about here at always that there's
hope and you're not alone. Absolutely yeah, And even just
these conversations, the studies show that awareness of a problem
is enough to create a pattern interrupt in your brain
to take that next step. So even just awareness and
having these heightened levels and these conversations that you're even
having here is helping. It might not see like these
big dramatic steps, but it counts. It matters. It's a
(13:03):
step forward. You're weekly dose aboutweigh or what other things
you're the books you're reading, the other podcasts you're listening to,
the conversations you're having with friends, with your therapist. All
those things are disrupting. And so that's why even without
Way it's a quick Saturday episode, I keep them ten
to fifteen minutes. I want it to be digestible. I
don't want it to be something that overwhelms you. I
(13:24):
want it to be that weekly pick me up of
encouragement or hope or someone just coming alongside you and
knowing that hey, we're all trying to figure this out
and then bringing experts on that can help help guide us.
So thank you Leanne for coming on today for those
for the weekly outwagh pick me up. Yes, I love it.
I would be a part of it. Which lean Where
can people find you? Yeah? Absolutely, you can just go
(13:46):
to Stressless Eating dot com. There's a ton of coal
resources for you to just get more awareness and really
help set yourself free. Awesome and I am at radio
Amy on Instagram. You can find links there for everything.
Also Amy dot com. I m hm
Feeling Things with Amy & Kat News
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Amy Brown
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