November 13, 2025 • 32 mins
Amy and Kat hear from listener Maggie who shares a fun fashion philosophy called The Rule of 7…a style tip that just might change how you accessorize. Amy also shares her new use for witch hazel and a new pet peeve of hers!
Also, listener Sadie left a voicemail with a heartfelt follow-up to last week’s episode, sharing how an unexpected injury helped her embrace a slower pace and ask, “What does this make possible?”
Alexandra Ballard is the fashion person on Instagram that Amy mentioned: @alexandraballardd. She’s the one that will post outfits you can wear that you likely already have in your closet.
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HOSTS:
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Kat Van Buren // @KatVanburen
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
Good.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
All right, break it down.
Speaker 3 (00:05):
If you ever have feelings that you just wons Amy
and Kat gotcha covin locking a brother, Ladies and folks,
do you just follow an the spirit where it's all
the front over real stuff to the chill stuff and
the m but Swayne, sometimes the best thing you can
do it just stop you feel things. This is Feeling.
Speaker 4 (00:27):
Things with Amy and Kat.
Speaker 2 (00:29):
Happy Thursday, Welcome to Couch Talks, our Q and a
slash listener engagement part of our Feeling Things podcast. I'm
Amy and I'm Kat, and I said listener engagement type
episode because we have listener voicemails we're playing for you today,
and one of them is sharing advice, so it's not
(00:50):
really a question.
Speaker 4 (00:51):
Normally.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
Kat is a therapist, so she gives this whole disclaimer
because if we get a question, we share our thoughts
around it, and you have you do this whole spiel
about how take away the grain of salt.
Speaker 4 (01:04):
This isn't therapy, This isn't therapy.
Speaker 2 (01:06):
We're just say mental health minded podcast and offering whatever
advice we can with the little information that we do have.
And you know, it's hard to really steer someone in
a direction when you don't know.
Speaker 4 (01:15):
All the details.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
However, we do have a voicemail that is going to
steer us in the right direction fashion wise. And before
we play the voicemail, I went to our Instagram, which
is Feeling Things podcast from October twenty fifth. It's a
post that you put up with a bunch of memes
(01:37):
and you swipe and see the memes like they're so
fun to look at. And one of the memes that
made me laugh. I remembered it. That's why I went
back to get it, and I was like, oh, this
would be perfect to reference. Is whatever style pants look
like crap to you are the pants you're supposed to wear,
And as soon as they start to look normal to you,
those are not the right pants anymore. Should always be
(02:00):
wearing pants you think looks stupid.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
Which is really how I feel same same like we
all were in the skinny jeans together. When skinny jeans
first became popular, I was like, ooh, I can't wear those.
Then I wore them for years and years and years.
Now I feel like I can never jeans always look
like the cut of them, or the hem or like
the bagginess or whatever.
Speaker 5 (02:22):
Oh I got into the high waisted. Now, I guess
high waited aren't cool anymore. Yeah, I'm not going back.
I'm not going back.
Speaker 4 (02:27):
I love a high, I love a mid. But I'm
with you. When high high first came out, it was like,
mom jeans.
Speaker 5 (02:32):
Yeah, I was like, eh, now I love them, I know.
Speaker 2 (02:35):
And then now I put on low waisted just what
I used to wear, and I'm like, oh, it's almost
like my body conforms to whatever. It just doesn't look
the same, Like, how in the world did I ever
wear those before?
Speaker 4 (02:47):
I mean, I know my body's not well.
Speaker 1 (02:49):
I think it's your eyes visual till you get used
to seeing something so you're like habituated to it, and
then as soon as it starts to look normal.
Speaker 5 (02:56):
They may change their style, and I mayne that's capitalism.
I think.
Speaker 1 (03:00):
Really, it's like, oh, you have the genes that you like,
Now you don't want to buy any more jeans. Here,
guess what, boom, These are loser genes. Now you have
to buy these.
Speaker 2 (03:07):
Capitalism at its finest, which I love a good tip
on where to buy things, what to buy. I like links,
I like sharing things I like I like when people
share things they like. But there's some accounts that I
follow where the overconsumption is out of control. Yes, there
is no reason we need to share this much stuff.
(03:28):
I don't know, so I had to for myself, even
though I really like the.
Speaker 4 (03:33):
Person, just mute.
Speaker 2 (03:35):
Yeah. I don't want to unfollow, because again I like
the person, I just had to mute. And that's for
my It has nothing to do with them, I mean,
and that's their business. So yeah, if that's how they
make money, I'm not even hating on it. I guess
I just realized like I was inundated and felt like
I needed. Actually that's not true. I didn't feel like
I needed at all, but it looked so cute that
(03:57):
then I had this desire to buy, to click on it,
and I'm like, okay, no, I just I still will shop, yes,
and I want links and I want cute things. It
just started to get a bit much.
Speaker 4 (04:10):
Yeah, and I'm like, oh, in the world.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
There was a couple of weeks ago I was looking
for a really cute like sweatsuit set before ours came out,
and my one of my friends who follows a bunch
of like fashion bloggers, and I can say before she
sent me this girl. I don't think I followed any
fashion link people. I don't think that actually came up
on my feet, and so that she sent me this girl.
(04:32):
She was like, this girl always posts really cute sets.
I wanted like a cute like yeah set. So I
followed her and I that's what when you said that,
The first thing I thought was anxiety because it feels
like every day she is posting a new like can't
live without these. I think that's a marketing tactic, which like,
good for you, it's your business. But I'm like, use
(04:53):
every single pair of pants you've posted, you said that
you live in them? How how how are you living
in all of them? Are you wearing them all once?
Or do you change multiple times a day?
Speaker 6 (05:03):
Like?
Speaker 1 (05:03):
It was so confusing to me. And then I was like, well,
I'm trying to find the one thing, but you've posted
fifteen of the things, and so yeah, I had to.
Speaker 5 (05:12):
Now I'm overwhelmed. Now I'm overwhelmed.
Speaker 1 (05:14):
And I many times I had gone to her like
I guess whatever page her shop page or whatever, and
I will say, this is some feedback for people that
do this, and like, don't take it from me, because
I obviously I am not the expert in this, but
when she had so many things on there, like, if
you give me three options, I'm good, but if you
(05:34):
give me twenty options or you're giving me five options
every single day, then I'm overthinking it or I'm like
this is too much. I'm not buying anything. So guess what,
I didn't buy anything from her.
Speaker 2 (05:46):
There's this other influencer or fashion type person that I
follow and she'll link things, but then she also does
videos that'll say, Okay, this is what you're gonna wear
tomorrow without having to go shopping because you likely have
ideas I'm about to give you in your closet. I
want her, yeah, And I wish I had her handle.
Maybe I'll try to find it and by the time
(06:07):
you do the show notes, I'll put it in there.
So I'll find her handle and I'll put it in
the show notes because I don't even know her name,
because she's not trying to be a known personality. She
literally is just doing fashion stuff, and I guess I
never really pay attention, but I do like her videos,
and you know, she'll kind of do the green screen
and she'll like be showing other people's pictures online as examples,
(06:29):
and she's like, if you've got you know, a white
button down, I want you to pair it with these
types of jeans, and then she'll be like, or these
jeans or these khakis or so that way, if you
don't have the first few genes in your closet, like
maybe you have something in your closet that will be
an outfit that she's providing inspo for, or she's like,
(06:50):
if you're thrifting this weekend, these are the things to
look for at the thrift store, and it'll pull together
like a really cute look right now. Or grab this
sweater out of your closet and throw it around, you know,
kind of like the tips sort of like the tip
that our collar is giving us, which we did the
Ralph Lauren rule a couple of weeks ago, thanks to
you because you shared it with us. It was like
(07:12):
the three piece rule, right Like they would show up
to work at Ralph Lauren and they had to.
Speaker 5 (07:17):
Have like three pieces. Three pieces. Okay, you're the one
that brought the rule a long time ago. I don't
think i've been living by it.
Speaker 2 (07:27):
I no, it's definitely three So like, if you know
they wanted to add like a scarf or a vest
or a belt, like, yeah, it's three. So you maybe
you're confused because you know that the caller is sharing
with us the seven peace rule, and.
Speaker 4 (07:41):
Maybe e've moved on.
Speaker 5 (07:42):
Yeah, I think I have three.
Speaker 1 (07:44):
Now that I hear seven, three seems like, oh.
Speaker 2 (07:47):
But that was just the Ralph Lauren like work rule,
Like you just have to do this. So this is
called the rule of seven. And this is from our
listener Maggie and her daughter Molly even chimes in from
the back seat. So here's what Maggie had to share.
Speaker 7 (08:03):
Hey, Amy, Kat, I'm listening to the Ralph Laurin episode
right now, and I want to drop a hot tip
because I tookt do not believe in the two out
of three rule. That just doesn't make a whole lot
of sense to me.
Speaker 6 (08:14):
But it did come.
Speaker 7 (08:15):
Across a really good instagrammer called Mary's Art. He's really fashionable. Yeah, yeah, yeah, Molly,
that's my fifteen months old in the backseat talking to y'all.
She has the rule of seven. So think of like,
if you have a bracelet, if you have a a hat,
(08:38):
if you have a purse or some cute shoes, everything
counts for one point. If you have something like super bold,
like a really often jacket or a bold color or
something that could sometimes count as two points. Your whole
outfit wants to add up to seven, which is easy
to remember because seven is the number of completion or whatever.
(09:00):
I've been trying it. You can go to her instagram
because she's really got some good styling tips out there,
But this one is very easy to replicate, and I
find that when I do get somewhere between seven, it's like,
if you're below a five or a six, your outfit's
not as good. But if you if you aim towards seven,
you look put together and it works. So one is
(09:20):
your droop that because hair, make up, and out I
feel like you need to do all three. But anyways,
I've actually never called it a hot line. So I
love listening to y'all keep up the good words and
have the day you need to have.
Speaker 4 (09:35):
Bye.
Speaker 2 (09:36):
I love that I know you still got the hot line,
and I love that she said have the day you
need to have. Thank you, Maggie, and hi Molly, you
hear Molly in the background, which I love this tip.
So in the Ralph Lauren episode, hearing her talk about
the hair and makeup, was also reminded me that you
shared with us.
Speaker 5 (09:55):
That you got to look expensive.
Speaker 4 (09:57):
How to look expensive? Yes, you just need to have well.
Speaker 5 (10:01):
I shared it, but I also debunked. At the same time.
Speaker 1 (10:03):
I was saying, like, I don't really get it, so
I don't want people to listen to this and be like, Catherine,
what the thing was that you have to have two
of three hair, makeup, outfit. So you could have hair
and makeup and like be wearing sweatpants, but you'll look expensive.
And I was like, I still don't look expensive. Don't
know what I look like. I look like it didn't
get fully ready.
Speaker 5 (10:24):
I like this. So she's saying that something like.
Speaker 1 (10:28):
More flashy, it is more points. So it's not like
a point for every item.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
Oh I don't it was a point like your shoe. No,
because i've since then, since we got this voicemail. I
don't know if my phone picked up on it, but
my algorithm has shown me people doing the rule of seven.
And I saw someone explain like, your shoes are one point,
your jeans are one point.
Speaker 1 (10:50):
You're well, Maggie said, if you have something like super
bold or a bold color or something that could sometimes
kind of two points. Okay, yeah, so I think that,
but maybe that as a beginner, just do seven when
everything's a point. But as you get more advanced in
the rule of seven, sometimes if you have a very
poppy pop of whatever, that can be too.
Speaker 5 (11:12):
It's like if you have crazy earrings, maybe is that
too Yeah? Maybe because then like you don't want to
have too much.
Speaker 2 (11:17):
Yeah, because that could be like your statement yes peace. Yeah,
So there you go, rule of seven.
Speaker 5 (11:23):
We need this is what we need?
Speaker 4 (11:25):
What do we need?
Speaker 5 (11:27):
Whatever? Lady lady.
Speaker 1 (11:28):
I feel like sometimes that's not a term of endearment.
Whatever person that you said you liked.
Speaker 2 (11:35):
The fashion girl that says here's what you're gonna wear
tomorrow and it's likely in your closet without spending any money. Yes,
she's definitely a lady. She's definitely in her twenties and
she lives in New York.
Speaker 5 (11:43):
Okay, she probably thinks I'm a lady.
Speaker 1 (11:45):
Yes, does So we need somebody to like that to
come on here and give us like five tips to
live by or like I just need like quick, easy,
like this kind of stuff. Because as I've gotten older
and I never thought this would happen. So this is
a word to the wise to all the younger people
(12:06):
who feel like getting dress is really simple. I never
thought I'd get to the point where I'm like, I
don't know how to dress, and I don't I know,
there's things that I like when I go shopping, but
then I don't really know how they go together anymore,
you know, like I need to take a new crush.
Speaker 4 (12:21):
Well, why don't you just if you know what you like,
why don't you just wear what you like?
Speaker 1 (12:25):
No, because there's because well I buy things I like,
but then I'm like, I don't know how to put
this together to make it look like how I want
it to look, you know, so it's not like I
it will only wear things that are cool, like I
might enjoy something that's not new or whatever.
Speaker 8 (12:41):
Like when I cleaned out my closet.
Speaker 1 (12:54):
When I clean up my closet when I moved, my
friends tried to get rid of some items in my
closet that they hardcore made.
Speaker 5 (13:00):
Fun of to the point I had tears.
Speaker 4 (13:03):
Oh, I remember that time you killed me.
Speaker 2 (13:05):
Well, I don't want to say that, Okay, just kidding deep, Well,
I don't think that that's bad. It wasn't like in
the moment you were just like, hey, I'm processly. You
just said you had tears. Well they saw the tears, right,
so why would it be weird that you talked to
me about it.
Speaker 4 (13:22):
You didn't say anything bad.
Speaker 5 (13:23):
Okay, okay, okay, okay.
Speaker 1 (13:26):
Anyway, I kept things that they were like these are
not in style. This is so embarrassing that you have these.
But I was like, I love those and I don't
know how to wear them right now, but I love them,
and so I doesn't need some help figuring out how
to wear things that I still love that don't go
with whatever jeans are in style.
Speaker 2 (13:44):
Now. You know, this mom popped up on my feed
the other day. I do not follow her, but she
obviously helps people dress or something. And she was replying
to a commentary that said her like soccer mom outfits
were too elevated and they wanted something a little more relatable.
And she was like, guys, I'm wearing pants and a
(14:07):
white button down, like she did look cute, and then
she had like a sweater around with like you know,
sneakers and a purse and fun sunglasses, Like she looked
really cute, and yeah, it might be elevated because we
want to wear leggings or joggers.
Speaker 4 (14:24):
But she has a vibe like this is her vibe.
Speaker 2 (14:27):
And she's like, I swear to you, there's this outfit
is relatable.
Speaker 4 (14:31):
I'm wearing a white button down. It's like a sheet.
Speaker 2 (14:34):
It's like it's not even ironed, and it's just untucked loose,
like big oversized white button down. And she was like,
but she had a vibe, I did this become elevated,
Like it's not. This is so cozy and comfortable and easy.
It's just as easy as throwing on sweats or a
T shirt or a hoodie.
Speaker 5 (14:54):
It's for her because she's used to wearing that.
Speaker 2 (14:56):
For her, for her, yes, but like if someone else.
She was trying to provide an outfit that is a
little bit more like a step up. But like then people,
she was like, I can't win with y'all, Like this
is not a complicated outfit and this is relatable's need.
Speaker 5 (15:12):
Fashion therapy is what we need.
Speaker 4 (15:14):
And I'm what do you mean fashion therapy?
Speaker 5 (15:16):
Like this is a whole new niche like I my specialties,
eating disorders, weedy people who are going through fashion crisis.
Speaker 2 (15:22):
I do think that social media has made it obviously
way more complicated.
Speaker 1 (15:27):
Yeh.
Speaker 2 (15:27):
I mean we used to just have to flip through magazines,
but you didn't have people, Like when you were flipping
in the magazine, you didn't have someone talking to you
and telling you what to do.
Speaker 1 (15:37):
This is out, This is so embarrassing. This is why
I would never wear this again. Oh that's what I
have on right now.
Speaker 5 (15:42):
There is that.
Speaker 2 (15:43):
One person that I follow and I still like her,
but she does do these posts where it's like she's like,
things I would never do are things you need to
stop doing right now, and then she'll go through five
examples and I still.
Speaker 5 (15:55):
Think she looks cute.
Speaker 2 (15:56):
And it's one of the things I literally was wearing
the other day and it's like, okay, whatever, I'm still
gonna wear it. But I just thought, wow, so bold
of her to be like stop doing this right now.
Speaker 5 (16:05):
You lose her. Yeah, you're like watching it and you're
like looking at your like.
Speaker 2 (16:09):
Shang alrighty oh yeah yeah yeah. My boyfriend said something
interesting last night. He loves jeans, loves.
Speaker 5 (16:20):
On himself, Like, what do you mean more.
Speaker 2 (16:23):
Than he He was like, I'm gonna go changing a
something more comfortable.
Speaker 5 (16:28):
Stop it. No, he didn't do it.
Speaker 2 (16:30):
He did, and he went and he put jeans on,
and I was like, I thought you were changing into
something more comfortable, and he was like I did, and
I was like jeans. He goes, I love jeans. I
think jeans are really comfortable brand of jeans. They were
just normal jeans, and I got my mind was blown.
Speaker 1 (16:49):
What's EPHN crazier is I think men's jeans are like less,
They're like not as stretchy most of the time too.
Speaker 2 (16:56):
Yes, they weren't stretchy. These were just normal geens. And
I was like, you're this is Are you a psychopath killer?
Speaker 1 (17:02):
That is one of the most interesting facts I've learned
about him, I know, and I can't relate because I
will go a whole week without wearing jeans.
Speaker 5 (17:11):
I will find ways to avoid wearing.
Speaker 2 (17:13):
Like I can't wait to take my jeans off and
put on sweatpants.
Speaker 4 (17:18):
Which I thought.
Speaker 2 (17:19):
You know, he has these Viory joggers that are so soft,
like they have a material of Viory that's like the
softest thing I've ever felt. And he has those in
a jogger and he put on jeans to chill around
the house.
Speaker 1 (17:35):
I can see somebody be like, I'm gonna wear a
comfortable outfit somewhere and it be jeans. But if I'm
in the house, the comfort is it's a different scale.
It's out of the house comfort and in the house comfort.
Out of the house comfort.
Speaker 5 (17:48):
Can be jeans.
Speaker 1 (17:49):
I can see how that can be more comfortable than
dress pants or for women, like a dress or a
skirt or something in the house comfort leggings. Not honestly,
I've moved on from leggings house comfort because they're tight,
baggy sweatpants, a pair of sweatpants that are at least
one size too big for me.
Speaker 5 (18:07):
Yeah, when I say I'm putting something more comfortable on,
that's what I mean.
Speaker 2 (18:11):
Like when when we said we're kind of living in
our feeling things.
Speaker 4 (18:16):
Sweat set like, I wasn't lying. That wasn't an exaggeration.
Speaker 2 (18:19):
It's obviously not every single day, but you did wear
it yourselves.
Speaker 4 (18:22):
You did wear it multiple days.
Speaker 5 (18:24):
I've worn it.
Speaker 1 (18:25):
I've worn those pants other than the day I washed them,
every single day at some point. Yeah, they're might get
home from work put them on. I don't want them
to bed because I get hot in sweatpants.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
I have been getting so hot when I sleep. But
I think that's my perimenopause. Like sometimes I'm having these
hot flushes. But I woke up so wetting.
Speaker 5 (18:43):
So you don't want to be with the other night.
Speaker 4 (18:44):
Like I just I woke up in like half my stuff.
Speaker 2 (18:46):
When I woke up in the morning, I had clothes
like like, I wasn't naked, but I think I went
to bed cold, so I had socks on, which I
normally don't sleep with socks, but I was cold, so
I had the socks on, and I had pants, and
I had a long sleeve top because there's my whole
pajama set. The pants were off, my top was still on,
my underwear was still on. Like I wasn't totally, but yeah,
I had stripped myself. Speaking of a sweating so have
(19:10):
you ever put witch hazel under your arms?
Speaker 6 (19:15):
No?
Speaker 5 (19:16):
Is this for like having super sweaty armpits?
Speaker 4 (19:18):
Well, I don't an armpit.
Speaker 5 (19:22):
Under I just called it under arms.
Speaker 1 (19:26):
One of my biggest beans, and he just looked at
me like I was the best disc it.
Speaker 4 (19:33):
No, I didn't.
Speaker 5 (19:34):
In this house we use under arms. You can say it.
I'm not going to, okay.
Speaker 2 (19:41):
One of my pet peeves also is on items. You
have the regular item and then the company will make
a value size or you know, family size, large family size.
It'll be the normal packaging, but up in the top
in big letters. It'll be like dal Usa on the bottle.
(20:02):
I realized, I don't like that.
Speaker 4 (20:04):
I don't like that at all on cereal boxes.
Speaker 5 (20:07):
Why don't you like on facewash.
Speaker 2 (20:10):
On lotion?
Speaker 4 (20:11):
I don't like it.
Speaker 2 (20:13):
I was at the grocery store the other day. I
don't want that all my stuff. I want the packaging
how it comes. If it's large, just let the bottle
speak for itself next to like I don't need I
don't need the extra large or value size, or.
Speaker 4 (20:31):
It's not sure is it more fifty more? I don't
want that on the bottle or the cereal.
Speaker 1 (20:37):
Box because it makes you feel like you're buying a
value size, and then you're.
Speaker 5 (20:40):
Like, no, I don't.
Speaker 2 (20:41):
I don't think it's I associate it with. It just
messes up the packaging, like you have the the like
if I get sometimes I get the survey lotion or
the Survey foaming facewash.
Speaker 4 (20:56):
Well, sometimes the bigger bottle will be on sale and
contemplate find it because I don't like esthetically that at
the top of it, it'll have this yellow like say,
it's it's pretty green and white bottle, and then on
the top and yellow and red.
Speaker 2 (21:12):
It's like value back or more or family size.
Speaker 5 (21:17):
I don't know.
Speaker 4 (21:18):
It just throws me off. Now you're looking at me weird.
Speaker 2 (21:21):
No, I'm just like, maybe this is very weird vulnerable
pet peeve that I have.
Speaker 4 (21:26):
But I had this thought at the grocery store the
other day.
Speaker 2 (21:29):
I was like, it's just really one of my pet
peeves that I don't think I've ever voiced until now.
Speaker 5 (21:34):
And how do you feel now that you got that
off your chain?
Speaker 2 (21:37):
I feel like, I hope I'm not the only one.
You probably aren't if anybody else out there listening feels
the same way or not alone.
Speaker 4 (21:44):
I like the packaging the way it is.
Speaker 1 (21:46):
You should get, like, you know how you did this
with your I think you did this with your laundry rooms.
Speaker 5 (21:51):
You've got different bottles to pour stuff.
Speaker 1 (21:53):
Into, so you could get a reasonable bottle and then
pour your value size into that bottle so it still
looks pretty and you get the discount.
Speaker 4 (22:00):
Okay, I can do that. I can sign off on that.
Speaker 5 (22:04):
I'm sorry that this is hard for you.
Speaker 2 (22:06):
It's not really that hard, but it's just something that
came to mind as a pet peep, because.
Speaker 4 (22:10):
The other word for under arm is a pet pee.
Speaker 5 (22:14):
Say it no time.
Speaker 4 (22:16):
I don't really, No, I hate it. I hate it.
Speaker 5 (22:18):
This is exposure therapy. No, I hate it. Just say
it separately, say arm arm, say.
Speaker 2 (22:25):
Pitt, pitt, you did it, I did it. How do
you feel I cannot be alone in this either.
Speaker 5 (22:31):
No, it's not a I don't love it.
Speaker 4 (22:33):
Yeah, but you you said it's so casual it roll
off the tongue.
Speaker 1 (22:36):
Yeah, you're like, I want to be somebody who says
under arms, okay, but I'm somebody who says.
Speaker 4 (22:40):
No, don't say it, don't say it, don't say it.
Speaker 2 (22:43):
Don't say it. Oh oh oh. I cannot handle it
like I do commercials for Ideal Image, and I have
for twenty years on the radio, twenty years, and thank goodness,
they appreciate on part part under arm, underarm. But Bobby
(23:04):
and I've done the spots together over the years as well,
on and off, and sometimes he'll go in and say
armpit and I'm like, can't say that.
Speaker 4 (23:11):
They prefer under arm because they.
Speaker 8 (23:13):
Are like me.
Speaker 2 (23:14):
It's classier Anyway, back to my original point about with Chasil.
I believe my daughter maybe as the first person that
(23:34):
saw this, or my daughter and I ended up talking
about because we saw it on TikTok or something. So
I bought some with Chasil for her and she was
gonna put it on her under arms. It's supposed to
help with sweating and odor whatever. And I used to
make my own deodorant, and then I started buying it
from Milk and Honey because it was basically the same ingredients.
(23:57):
But over the years, I don't know if something has
cha changed and how they do it.
Speaker 4 (24:01):
But it's different.
Speaker 2 (24:02):
So I either need to go back to making my
own or figure out a new plan, because I bought
some other ones, like at the drug store that I
thought I would like.
Speaker 1 (24:09):
But do you wear you wear aluminum free deonderant? Well, yeah,
it's okay. Yeah, I wear an anti purseprit you go.
You're all about, you're all in on the.
Speaker 5 (24:20):
I'm in on it, Okay. I tried years ago to
do the like whatever deodorant aluminum free yeah, and then
like the chartroll and all that, but it ruined all
my clothes.
Speaker 4 (24:31):
Yeah, but you haven't tried my homemade version.
Speaker 1 (24:33):
I haven't, but I think I was traumatized because I
had all these It ruined all my like sports pros
and stuff because I would wear it when I would
I was teaching cycling. I was like working out every
single day, and it made these huge white rings on
my armpits around all my nice, like nicer stuff.
Speaker 5 (24:49):
I would teach it and it ruined all my stuff.
Speaker 2 (24:51):
Well, I don't know what brand that is, Like I
haven't had an issue, Yeah, don't. Yeah, maybe they've made improvements,
but I know that everybody's pH their whole. But like
how your body responds to different types of deodorant is
so different for everybody, and everybody sweats differently. But I've
been adding the Witch Hazel. When I get out of
(25:12):
the shower, I'll just put some on a cotton pad
and kind of wipe it under my arms, and it's
helped so much.
Speaker 4 (25:19):
It's like I don't sweat as much.
Speaker 2 (25:21):
Yeah, and then so and then I put like a
little bit of the deodorant my milk and honey one
that I'm not totally loving at the moment. But I
haven't you gone to get all my ingredients.
Speaker 4 (25:30):
To make my own. I have it on my list.
Speaker 2 (25:32):
I need to do that, but some days I'm not
wearing anything because I just do the Witch Hazel.
Speaker 5 (25:37):
So do you work out with yodorant on?
Speaker 2 (25:39):
I haven't been at pilates, but I'm not I don't
really sweat that much at plates. Yeah, sometimes I just
wanna say.
Speaker 5 (25:46):
Don't get the machine next to Amy.
Speaker 2 (25:48):
No, it's not that kind of pilates. It's like a
stretch and I mean we were.
Speaker 4 (25:53):
Working but really hard. It is hard, but I'm not
sweating that much. Like the room's not.
Speaker 5 (25:58):
Hot, I will say, he says. So I like and
like lagree and stuff.
Speaker 1 (26:02):
I like those workouts because you could go there and
then go do something after versus like a lot of
other workouts, like I have to get totally reready and
like take a shower. So that's to good like pre
work if you don't have time to get ready.
Speaker 4 (26:12):
Yes, sir, like you can go another day.
Speaker 5 (26:15):
You said you did your makeup and then went to
plotis and then went to work.
Speaker 2 (26:17):
Yeah, I know. So anyway, that's my Witch Hazel Deodora
situation that nobody asked for. But maybe somebody is in
a similar spot, and hey, I don't know why the
witch Hazel works.
Speaker 4 (26:31):
Probably should look that up, but it's working. Give it
a go, Give it a go. We do have another voicemail.
Speaker 2 (26:38):
This is from Sadie and it is a follow up
to last week's couch Talks. We got an email from
a listener that had some disordered eating behaviors pop up
after she tore her meniscus. And this is a listener
who also tore her meniscus and she's just affirming some
of the advice that we gave and encourage that listener
(27:01):
and maybe other listeners out there that maybe are going
through something similar.
Speaker 4 (27:04):
So this is.
Speaker 6 (27:05):
Sadie a Me and kat I to show. I am
listening to today's episode about the girl who tore herminis
and is having to sit and I actually am a
thirty three year old mom of three who tore my
acl and meniscus. A kid's versus parent soccer game there
(27:26):
and I have it starts the same thing, but I
literally think, like Amy says, what does this make possible?
And so then I after you know, it took a
while of sitting in it to figure out, I may
onto the next thing go go, always wanting to like
the party, do all the things, have everything done, don't
(27:46):
ask for help. Well that's the kind of person I am.
And I've had to step back and slow down and
enjoy the time in and you know, I'm going like
what race can I do? Noxt but whatever? And I've
had to take a step back and it's been actually,
really it was very hard mentally, but it's actually been good.
(28:08):
So thank you for that. And I just want to
tell that listener that you can something from this and
it can teach you something. So listen to Amy and
that because I've been able to get through this because
of that mindset of what is it being possible? What
are the paps of this? What can I do? Now?
(28:29):
Thanks for always bringing positive life to my life. I've
learned a lot to listen to Amy on the Bobby
Bone Show. To this show, you guys put things in
perspective a lot for me.
Speaker 2 (28:41):
So I will say that original question came from Donald Miller,
which I don't know who he credits that originally coming from,
but Kat and I interviewed him a couple of years
ago and he gave us that question of what does
this make possible? And there's studies around that word what
of like versus versus why? Yeah, and how what is
(29:02):
so much more powerful? Like people that use what live
a more fulfilled life?
Speaker 5 (29:08):
That is interesting. I don't know that. Yeah, I know,
just I try to stay away.
Speaker 1 (29:13):
I mean I still say it, but stay away from
why because it feels more accusatory or more negative.
Speaker 4 (29:19):
Yeah, why did this happen to me?
Speaker 5 (29:21):
Versus what does this? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (29:23):
I think the Ted talk I saw on it like
about the fulfillment in life. It was a Ted talk
and one of the examples that was given was like,
you know, if you have an employee that's at odds
with her boss or something. And I'm paraphrasing the whole
thing here, but like you could go to your boss
and be like, why are you treating me this way?
(29:44):
Or why is there this tension? Or why am I
in this position? Instead of here.
Speaker 4 (29:51):
It's like why why? Why?
Speaker 2 (29:52):
When you could go to your boss, or you could
ask yourself like what could I be doing differently? Or
what can I do to add value? What do you
need from me? Or what can we do to resolve this?
Like it sounds very different, just that that that one word.
Speaker 5 (30:09):
Change takes you out of victim.
Speaker 4 (30:12):
Yes, yeah, yeah, which is what Donald Miller.
Speaker 5 (30:16):
Yeah, his whole book.
Speaker 4 (30:17):
Ye, a mission here on a mission. There's a victim,
the villain, the hero. Is there a fourth character?
Speaker 5 (30:26):
That's it?
Speaker 4 (30:27):
Victim, hero, villain.
Speaker 1 (30:29):
Speaking of I talked to you today about we should
talk about drama triangle.
Speaker 5 (30:32):
It's very similar. Yeah, so maybe next couple weeks we'll
talk about that.
Speaker 2 (30:37):
I remember the first time my our couple therapist. It
was when Ben and I were doing couple's therapy. We
were already separated. We were going and our couple therapists
brought out the old white board and the drama triangle.
Speaker 5 (30:50):
Really, it's one of my favorite things to teach.
Speaker 2 (30:53):
Yeah, and I had I mean that was what only
a few years ago. I had never heard of it before,
And in that moment, I was like, oh, I could
think of multiple relationships and scenarios and times where I
had been one of those characters.
Speaker 5 (31:09):
Yeah, and we all I don't want we all do that.
Speaker 4 (31:11):
Yeah, we won't give it away.
Speaker 5 (31:12):
I mean people could google.
Speaker 2 (31:13):
It, but no, no, don't google it because we're going
to talk about it again. You're gonna learn about it
from Cat because she's a licensed therapist and she knows
what she's talking about. Yeah, yeah, so thank you for
the voicemails. We love hearing from y'all. If you want
to call and leave us a voicemail, you can eight
seven seven two o seven two o seven seven teamwork, Yeah,
makes the dream work. And then if you want to
(31:35):
email us, you can for couch talks as well, voicemail
or email, ask a question, share some advice, call her hotline, yeah,
and the email is hey there at feelingthingspodcast dot com.
We are Feeling Things podcast on all the socials and YouTube,
and someone from one of our social clips the other
day commented, like, oh my gosh, I was dying laughing.
(31:57):
It was when I think it was the whenever you
we talked about how your husband wasn't masculine and.
Speaker 4 (32:02):
We were like dying laughing in the social clip.
Speaker 2 (32:04):
Well, they had listened to the podcast and they thought
it was so funny, but then later when they saw
the social clip, they were laughing even more and they
were like, I just subscribe to YouTube because now I
know I need to be watching y'all because this just
made me laugh even more seeing y'all laugh instead of
just hearing you laugh.
Speaker 6 (32:21):
Thank you, so.
Speaker 2 (32:22):
Yeah, like and subscribe and we hope you have the
day you need to have.
Speaker 4 (32:27):
Bye Bye,
Good.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
All right, break it down.
Speaker 3 (00:05):
If you ever have feelings that you just wons Amy
and Kat gotcha covin locking a brother, Ladies and folks,
do you just follow an the spirit where it's all
the front over real stuff to the chill stuff and
the m but Swayne, sometimes the best thing you can
do it just stop you feel things. This is Feeling.
Speaker 4 (00:27):
Things with Amy and Kat.
Speaker 2 (00:29):
Happy Thursday, Welcome to Couch Talks, our Q and a
slash listener engagement part of our Feeling Things podcast. I'm
Amy and I'm Kat, and I said listener engagement type
episode because we have listener voicemails we're playing for you today,
and one of them is sharing advice, so it's not
(00:50):
really a question.
Speaker 4 (00:51):
Normally.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
Kat is a therapist, so she gives this whole disclaimer
because if we get a question, we share our thoughts
around it, and you have you do this whole spiel
about how take away the grain of salt.
Speaker 4 (01:04):
This isn't therapy, This isn't therapy.
Speaker 2 (01:06):
We're just say mental health minded podcast and offering whatever
advice we can with the little information that we do have.
And you know, it's hard to really steer someone in
a direction when you don't know.
Speaker 4 (01:15):
All the details.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
However, we do have a voicemail that is going to
steer us in the right direction fashion wise. And before
we play the voicemail, I went to our Instagram, which
is Feeling Things podcast from October twenty fifth. It's a
post that you put up with a bunch of memes
(01:37):
and you swipe and see the memes like they're so
fun to look at. And one of the memes that
made me laugh. I remembered it. That's why I went
back to get it, and I was like, oh, this
would be perfect to reference. Is whatever style pants look
like crap to you are the pants you're supposed to wear,
And as soon as they start to look normal to you,
those are not the right pants anymore. Should always be
(02:00):
wearing pants you think looks stupid.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
Which is really how I feel same same like we
all were in the skinny jeans together. When skinny jeans
first became popular, I was like, ooh, I can't wear those.
Then I wore them for years and years and years.
Now I feel like I can never jeans always look
like the cut of them, or the hem or like
the bagginess or whatever.
Speaker 5 (02:22):
Oh I got into the high waisted. Now, I guess
high waited aren't cool anymore. Yeah, I'm not going back.
I'm not going back.
Speaker 4 (02:27):
I love a high, I love a mid. But I'm
with you. When high high first came out, it was like,
mom jeans.
Speaker 5 (02:32):
Yeah, I was like, eh, now I love them, I know.
Speaker 2 (02:35):
And then now I put on low waisted just what
I used to wear, and I'm like, oh, it's almost
like my body conforms to whatever. It just doesn't look
the same, Like, how in the world did I ever
wear those before?
Speaker 4 (02:47):
I mean, I know my body's not well.
Speaker 1 (02:49):
I think it's your eyes visual till you get used
to seeing something so you're like habituated to it, and
then as soon as it starts to look normal.
Speaker 5 (02:56):
They may change their style, and I mayne that's capitalism.
I think.
Speaker 1 (03:00):
Really, it's like, oh, you have the genes that you like,
Now you don't want to buy any more jeans. Here,
guess what, boom, These are loser genes. Now you have
to buy these.
Speaker 2 (03:07):
Capitalism at its finest, which I love a good tip
on where to buy things, what to buy. I like links,
I like sharing things I like I like when people
share things they like. But there's some accounts that I
follow where the overconsumption is out of control. Yes, there
is no reason we need to share this much stuff.
(03:28):
I don't know, so I had to for myself, even
though I really like the.
Speaker 4 (03:33):
Person, just mute.
Speaker 2 (03:35):
Yeah. I don't want to unfollow, because again I like
the person, I just had to mute. And that's for
my It has nothing to do with them, I mean,
and that's their business. So yeah, if that's how they
make money, I'm not even hating on it. I guess
I just realized like I was inundated and felt like
I needed. Actually that's not true. I didn't feel like
I needed at all, but it looked so cute that
(03:57):
then I had this desire to buy, to click on it,
and I'm like, okay, no, I just I still will shop, yes,
and I want links and I want cute things. It
just started to get a bit much.
Speaker 4 (04:10):
Yeah, and I'm like, oh, in the world.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
There was a couple of weeks ago I was looking
for a really cute like sweatsuit set before ours came out,
and my one of my friends who follows a bunch
of like fashion bloggers, and I can say before she
sent me this girl. I don't think I followed any
fashion link people. I don't think that actually came up
on my feet, and so that she sent me this girl.
(04:32):
She was like, this girl always posts really cute sets.
I wanted like a cute like yeah set. So I
followed her and I that's what when you said that,
The first thing I thought was anxiety because it feels
like every day she is posting a new like can't
live without these. I think that's a marketing tactic, which like,
good for you, it's your business. But I'm like, use
(04:53):
every single pair of pants you've posted, you said that
you live in them? How how how are you living
in all of them? Are you wearing them all once?
Or do you change multiple times a day?
Speaker 6 (05:03):
Like?
Speaker 1 (05:03):
It was so confusing to me. And then I was like, well,
I'm trying to find the one thing, but you've posted
fifteen of the things, and so yeah, I had to.
Speaker 5 (05:12):
Now I'm overwhelmed. Now I'm overwhelmed.
Speaker 1 (05:14):
And I many times I had gone to her like
I guess whatever page her shop page or whatever, and
I will say, this is some feedback for people that
do this, and like, don't take it from me, because
I obviously I am not the expert in this, but
when she had so many things on there, like, if
you give me three options, I'm good, but if you
(05:34):
give me twenty options or you're giving me five options
every single day, then I'm overthinking it or I'm like
this is too much. I'm not buying anything. So guess what,
I didn't buy anything from her.
Speaker 2 (05:46):
There's this other influencer or fashion type person that I
follow and she'll link things, but then she also does
videos that'll say, Okay, this is what you're gonna wear
tomorrow without having to go shopping because you likely have
ideas I'm about to give you in your closet. I
want her, yeah, And I wish I had her handle.
Maybe I'll try to find it and by the time
(06:07):
you do the show notes, I'll put it in there.
So I'll find her handle and I'll put it in
the show notes because I don't even know her name,
because she's not trying to be a known personality. She
literally is just doing fashion stuff, and I guess I
never really pay attention, but I do like her videos,
and you know, she'll kind of do the green screen
and she'll like be showing other people's pictures online as examples,
(06:29):
and she's like, if you've got you know, a white
button down, I want you to pair it with these
types of jeans, and then she'll be like, or these
jeans or these khakis or so that way, if you
don't have the first few genes in your closet, like
maybe you have something in your closet that will be
an outfit that she's providing inspo for, or she's like,
(06:50):
if you're thrifting this weekend, these are the things to
look for at the thrift store, and it'll pull together
like a really cute look right now. Or grab this
sweater out of your closet and throw it around, you know,
kind of like the tips sort of like the tip
that our collar is giving us, which we did the
Ralph Lauren rule a couple of weeks ago, thanks to
you because you shared it with us. It was like
(07:12):
the three piece rule, right Like they would show up
to work at Ralph Lauren and they had to.
Speaker 5 (07:17):
Have like three pieces. Three pieces. Okay, you're the one
that brought the rule a long time ago. I don't
think i've been living by it.
Speaker 2 (07:27):
I no, it's definitely three So like, if you know
they wanted to add like a scarf or a vest
or a belt, like, yeah, it's three. So you maybe
you're confused because you know that the caller is sharing
with us the seven peace rule, and.
Speaker 4 (07:41):
Maybe e've moved on.
Speaker 5 (07:42):
Yeah, I think I have three.
Speaker 1 (07:44):
Now that I hear seven, three seems like, oh.
Speaker 2 (07:47):
But that was just the Ralph Lauren like work rule,
Like you just have to do this. So this is
called the rule of seven. And this is from our
listener Maggie and her daughter Molly even chimes in from
the back seat. So here's what Maggie had to share.
Speaker 7 (08:03):
Hey, Amy, Kat, I'm listening to the Ralph Laurin episode
right now, and I want to drop a hot tip
because I tookt do not believe in the two out
of three rule. That just doesn't make a whole lot
of sense to me.
Speaker 6 (08:14):
But it did come.
Speaker 7 (08:15):
Across a really good instagrammer called Mary's Art. He's really fashionable. Yeah, yeah, yeah, Molly,
that's my fifteen months old in the backseat talking to y'all.
She has the rule of seven. So think of like,
if you have a bracelet, if you have a a hat,
(08:38):
if you have a purse or some cute shoes, everything
counts for one point. If you have something like super bold,
like a really often jacket or a bold color or
something that could sometimes count as two points. Your whole
outfit wants to add up to seven, which is easy
to remember because seven is the number of completion or whatever.
(09:00):
I've been trying it. You can go to her instagram
because she's really got some good styling tips out there,
But this one is very easy to replicate, and I
find that when I do get somewhere between seven, it's like,
if you're below a five or a six, your outfit's
not as good. But if you if you aim towards seven,
you look put together and it works. So one is
(09:20):
your droop that because hair, make up, and out I
feel like you need to do all three. But anyways,
I've actually never called it a hot line. So I
love listening to y'all keep up the good words and
have the day you need to have.
Speaker 4 (09:35):
Bye.
Speaker 2 (09:36):
I love that I know you still got the hot line,
and I love that she said have the day you
need to have. Thank you, Maggie, and hi Molly, you
hear Molly in the background, which I love this tip.
So in the Ralph Lauren episode, hearing her talk about
the hair and makeup, was also reminded me that you
shared with us.
Speaker 5 (09:55):
That you got to look expensive.
Speaker 4 (09:57):
How to look expensive? Yes, you just need to have well.
Speaker 5 (10:01):
I shared it, but I also debunked. At the same time.
Speaker 1 (10:03):
I was saying, like, I don't really get it, so
I don't want people to listen to this and be like, Catherine,
what the thing was that you have to have two
of three hair, makeup, outfit. So you could have hair
and makeup and like be wearing sweatpants, but you'll look expensive.
And I was like, I still don't look expensive. Don't
know what I look like. I look like it didn't
get fully ready.
Speaker 5 (10:24):
I like this. So she's saying that something like.
Speaker 1 (10:28):
More flashy, it is more points. So it's not like
a point for every item.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
Oh I don't it was a point like your shoe. No,
because i've since then, since we got this voicemail. I
don't know if my phone picked up on it, but
my algorithm has shown me people doing the rule of seven.
And I saw someone explain like, your shoes are one point,
your jeans are one point.
Speaker 1 (10:50):
You're well, Maggie said, if you have something like super
bold or a bold color or something that could sometimes
kind of two points. Okay, yeah, so I think that,
but maybe that as a beginner, just do seven when
everything's a point. But as you get more advanced in
the rule of seven, sometimes if you have a very
poppy pop of whatever, that can be too.
Speaker 5 (11:12):
It's like if you have crazy earrings, maybe is that
too Yeah? Maybe because then like you don't want to
have too much.
Speaker 2 (11:17):
Yeah, because that could be like your statement yes peace. Yeah,
So there you go, rule of seven.
Speaker 5 (11:23):
We need this is what we need?
Speaker 4 (11:25):
What do we need?
Speaker 5 (11:27):
Whatever? Lady lady.
Speaker 1 (11:28):
I feel like sometimes that's not a term of endearment.
Whatever person that you said you liked.
Speaker 2 (11:35):
The fashion girl that says here's what you're gonna wear
tomorrow and it's likely in your closet without spending any money. Yes,
she's definitely a lady. She's definitely in her twenties and
she lives in New York.
Speaker 5 (11:43):
Okay, she probably thinks I'm a lady.
Speaker 1 (11:45):
Yes, does So we need somebody to like that to
come on here and give us like five tips to
live by or like I just need like quick, easy,
like this kind of stuff. Because as I've gotten older
and I never thought this would happen. So this is
a word to the wise to all the younger people
(12:06):
who feel like getting dress is really simple. I never
thought I'd get to the point where I'm like, I
don't know how to dress, and I don't I know,
there's things that I like when I go shopping, but
then I don't really know how they go together anymore,
you know, like I need to take a new crush.
Speaker 4 (12:21):
Well, why don't you just if you know what you like,
why don't you just wear what you like?
Speaker 1 (12:25):
No, because there's because well I buy things I like,
but then I'm like, I don't know how to put
this together to make it look like how I want
it to look, you know, so it's not like I
it will only wear things that are cool, like I
might enjoy something that's not new or whatever.
Speaker 8 (12:41):
Like when I cleaned out my closet.
Speaker 1 (12:54):
When I clean up my closet when I moved, my
friends tried to get rid of some items in my
closet that they hardcore made.
Speaker 5 (13:00):
Fun of to the point I had tears.
Speaker 4 (13:03):
Oh, I remember that time you killed me.
Speaker 2 (13:05):
Well, I don't want to say that, Okay, just kidding deep, Well,
I don't think that that's bad. It wasn't like in
the moment you were just like, hey, I'm processly. You
just said you had tears. Well they saw the tears, right,
so why would it be weird that you talked to
me about it.
Speaker 4 (13:22):
You didn't say anything bad.
Speaker 5 (13:23):
Okay, okay, okay, okay.
Speaker 1 (13:26):
Anyway, I kept things that they were like these are
not in style. This is so embarrassing that you have these.
But I was like, I love those and I don't
know how to wear them right now, but I love them,
and so I doesn't need some help figuring out how
to wear things that I still love that don't go
with whatever jeans are in style.
Speaker 2 (13:44):
Now. You know, this mom popped up on my feed
the other day. I do not follow her, but she
obviously helps people dress or something. And she was replying
to a commentary that said her like soccer mom outfits
were too elevated and they wanted something a little more relatable.
And she was like, guys, I'm wearing pants and a
(14:07):
white button down, like she did look cute, and then
she had like a sweater around with like you know,
sneakers and a purse and fun sunglasses, Like she looked
really cute, and yeah, it might be elevated because we
want to wear leggings or joggers.
Speaker 4 (14:24):
But she has a vibe like this is her vibe.
Speaker 2 (14:27):
And she's like, I swear to you, there's this outfit
is relatable.
Speaker 4 (14:31):
I'm wearing a white button down. It's like a sheet.
Speaker 2 (14:34):
It's like it's not even ironed, and it's just untucked loose,
like big oversized white button down. And she was like,
but she had a vibe, I did this become elevated,
Like it's not. This is so cozy and comfortable and easy.
It's just as easy as throwing on sweats or a
T shirt or a hoodie.
Speaker 5 (14:54):
It's for her because she's used to wearing that.
Speaker 2 (14:56):
For her, for her, yes, but like if someone else.
She was trying to provide an outfit that is a
little bit more like a step up. But like then people,
she was like, I can't win with y'all, Like this
is not a complicated outfit and this is relatable's need.
Speaker 5 (15:12):
Fashion therapy is what we need.
Speaker 4 (15:14):
And I'm what do you mean fashion therapy?
Speaker 5 (15:16):
Like this is a whole new niche like I my specialties,
eating disorders, weedy people who are going through fashion crisis.
Speaker 2 (15:22):
I do think that social media has made it obviously
way more complicated.
Speaker 1 (15:27):
Yeh.
Speaker 2 (15:27):
I mean we used to just have to flip through magazines,
but you didn't have people, Like when you were flipping
in the magazine, you didn't have someone talking to you
and telling you what to do.
Speaker 1 (15:37):
This is out, This is so embarrassing. This is why
I would never wear this again. Oh that's what I
have on right now.
Speaker 5 (15:42):
There is that.
Speaker 2 (15:43):
One person that I follow and I still like her,
but she does do these posts where it's like she's like,
things I would never do are things you need to
stop doing right now, and then she'll go through five
examples and I still.
Speaker 5 (15:55):
Think she looks cute.
Speaker 2 (15:56):
And it's one of the things I literally was wearing
the other day and it's like, okay, whatever, I'm still
gonna wear it. But I just thought, wow, so bold
of her to be like stop doing this right now.
Speaker 5 (16:05):
You lose her. Yeah, you're like watching it and you're
like looking at your like.
Speaker 2 (16:09):
Shang alrighty oh yeah yeah yeah. My boyfriend said something
interesting last night. He loves jeans, loves.
Speaker 5 (16:20):
On himself, Like, what do you mean more.
Speaker 2 (16:23):
Than he He was like, I'm gonna go changing a
something more comfortable.
Speaker 5 (16:28):
Stop it. No, he didn't do it.
Speaker 2 (16:30):
He did, and he went and he put jeans on,
and I was like, I thought you were changing into
something more comfortable, and he was like I did, and
I was like jeans. He goes, I love jeans. I
think jeans are really comfortable brand of jeans. They were
just normal jeans, and I got my mind was blown.
Speaker 1 (16:49):
What's EPHN crazier is I think men's jeans are like less,
They're like not as stretchy most of the time too.
Speaker 2 (16:56):
Yes, they weren't stretchy. These were just normal geens. And
I was like, you're this is Are you a psychopath killer?
Speaker 1 (17:02):
That is one of the most interesting facts I've learned
about him, I know, and I can't relate because I
will go a whole week without wearing jeans.
Speaker 5 (17:11):
I will find ways to avoid wearing.
Speaker 2 (17:13):
Like I can't wait to take my jeans off and
put on sweatpants.
Speaker 4 (17:18):
Which I thought.
Speaker 2 (17:19):
You know, he has these Viory joggers that are so soft,
like they have a material of Viory that's like the
softest thing I've ever felt. And he has those in
a jogger and he put on jeans to chill around
the house.
Speaker 1 (17:35):
I can see somebody be like, I'm gonna wear a
comfortable outfit somewhere and it be jeans. But if I'm
in the house, the comfort is it's a different scale.
It's out of the house comfort and in the house comfort.
Out of the house comfort.
Speaker 5 (17:48):
Can be jeans.
Speaker 1 (17:49):
I can see how that can be more comfortable than
dress pants or for women, like a dress or a
skirt or something in the house comfort leggings. Not honestly,
I've moved on from leggings house comfort because they're tight,
baggy sweatpants, a pair of sweatpants that are at least
one size too big for me.
Speaker 5 (18:07):
Yeah, when I say I'm putting something more comfortable on,
that's what I mean.
Speaker 2 (18:11):
Like when when we said we're kind of living in
our feeling things.
Speaker 4 (18:16):
Sweat set like, I wasn't lying. That wasn't an exaggeration.
Speaker 2 (18:19):
It's obviously not every single day, but you did wear
it yourselves.
Speaker 4 (18:22):
You did wear it multiple days.
Speaker 5 (18:24):
I've worn it.
Speaker 1 (18:25):
I've worn those pants other than the day I washed them,
every single day at some point. Yeah, they're might get
home from work put them on. I don't want them
to bed because I get hot in sweatpants.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
I have been getting so hot when I sleep. But
I think that's my perimenopause. Like sometimes I'm having these
hot flushes. But I woke up so wetting.
Speaker 5 (18:43):
So you don't want to be with the other night.
Speaker 4 (18:44):
Like I just I woke up in like half my stuff.
Speaker 2 (18:46):
When I woke up in the morning, I had clothes
like like, I wasn't naked, but I think I went
to bed cold, so I had socks on, which I
normally don't sleep with socks, but I was cold, so
I had the socks on, and I had pants, and
I had a long sleeve top because there's my whole
pajama set. The pants were off, my top was still on,
my underwear was still on. Like I wasn't totally, but yeah,
I had stripped myself. Speaking of a sweating so have
(19:10):
you ever put witch hazel under your arms?
Speaker 6 (19:15):
No?
Speaker 5 (19:16):
Is this for like having super sweaty armpits?
Speaker 4 (19:18):
Well, I don't an armpit.
Speaker 5 (19:22):
Under I just called it under arms.
Speaker 1 (19:26):
One of my biggest beans, and he just looked at
me like I was the best disc it.
Speaker 4 (19:33):
No, I didn't.
Speaker 5 (19:34):
In this house we use under arms. You can say it.
I'm not going to, okay.
Speaker 2 (19:41):
One of my pet peeves also is on items. You
have the regular item and then the company will make
a value size or you know, family size, large family size.
It'll be the normal packaging, but up in the top
in big letters. It'll be like dal Usa on the bottle.
(20:02):
I realized, I don't like that.
Speaker 4 (20:04):
I don't like that at all on cereal boxes.
Speaker 5 (20:07):
Why don't you like on facewash.
Speaker 2 (20:10):
On lotion?
Speaker 4 (20:11):
I don't like it.
Speaker 2 (20:13):
I was at the grocery store the other day. I
don't want that all my stuff. I want the packaging
how it comes. If it's large, just let the bottle
speak for itself next to like I don't need I
don't need the extra large or value size, or.
Speaker 4 (20:31):
It's not sure is it more fifty more? I don't
want that on the bottle or the cereal.
Speaker 1 (20:37):
Box because it makes you feel like you're buying a
value size, and then you're.
Speaker 5 (20:40):
Like, no, I don't.
Speaker 2 (20:41):
I don't think it's I associate it with. It just
messes up the packaging, like you have the the like
if I get sometimes I get the survey lotion or
the Survey foaming facewash.
Speaker 4 (20:56):
Well, sometimes the bigger bottle will be on sale and
contemplate find it because I don't like esthetically that at
the top of it, it'll have this yellow like say,
it's it's pretty green and white bottle, and then on
the top and yellow and red.
Speaker 2 (21:12):
It's like value back or more or family size.
Speaker 5 (21:17):
I don't know.
Speaker 4 (21:18):
It just throws me off. Now you're looking at me weird.
Speaker 2 (21:21):
No, I'm just like, maybe this is very weird vulnerable
pet peeve that I have.
Speaker 4 (21:26):
But I had this thought at the grocery store the
other day.
Speaker 2 (21:29):
I was like, it's just really one of my pet
peeves that I don't think I've ever voiced until now.
Speaker 5 (21:34):
And how do you feel now that you got that
off your chain?
Speaker 2 (21:37):
I feel like, I hope I'm not the only one.
You probably aren't if anybody else out there listening feels
the same way or not alone.
Speaker 4 (21:44):
I like the packaging the way it is.
Speaker 1 (21:46):
You should get, like, you know how you did this
with your I think you did this with your laundry rooms.
Speaker 5 (21:51):
You've got different bottles to pour stuff.
Speaker 1 (21:53):
Into, so you could get a reasonable bottle and then
pour your value size into that bottle so it still
looks pretty and you get the discount.
Speaker 4 (22:00):
Okay, I can do that. I can sign off on that.
Speaker 5 (22:04):
I'm sorry that this is hard for you.
Speaker 2 (22:06):
It's not really that hard, but it's just something that
came to mind as a pet peep, because.
Speaker 4 (22:10):
The other word for under arm is a pet pee.
Speaker 5 (22:14):
Say it no time.
Speaker 4 (22:16):
I don't really, No, I hate it. I hate it.
Speaker 5 (22:18):
This is exposure therapy. No, I hate it. Just say
it separately, say arm arm, say.
Speaker 2 (22:25):
Pitt, pitt, you did it, I did it. How do
you feel I cannot be alone in this either.
Speaker 5 (22:31):
No, it's not a I don't love it.
Speaker 4 (22:33):
Yeah, but you you said it's so casual it roll
off the tongue.
Speaker 1 (22:36):
Yeah, you're like, I want to be somebody who says
under arms, okay, but I'm somebody who says.
Speaker 4 (22:40):
No, don't say it, don't say it, don't say it.
Speaker 2 (22:43):
Don't say it. Oh oh oh. I cannot handle it
like I do commercials for Ideal Image, and I have
for twenty years on the radio, twenty years, and thank goodness,
they appreciate on part part under arm, underarm. But Bobby
(23:04):
and I've done the spots together over the years as well,
on and off, and sometimes he'll go in and say
armpit and I'm like, can't say that.
Speaker 4 (23:11):
They prefer under arm because they.
Speaker 8 (23:13):
Are like me.
Speaker 2 (23:14):
It's classier Anyway, back to my original point about with Chasil.
I believe my daughter maybe as the first person that
(23:34):
saw this, or my daughter and I ended up talking
about because we saw it on TikTok or something. So
I bought some with Chasil for her and she was
gonna put it on her under arms. It's supposed to
help with sweating and odor whatever. And I used to
make my own deodorant, and then I started buying it
from Milk and Honey because it was basically the same ingredients.
(23:57):
But over the years, I don't know if something has
cha changed and how they do it.
Speaker 4 (24:01):
But it's different.
Speaker 2 (24:02):
So I either need to go back to making my
own or figure out a new plan, because I bought
some other ones, like at the drug store that I
thought I would like.
Speaker 1 (24:09):
But do you wear you wear aluminum free deonderant? Well, yeah,
it's okay. Yeah, I wear an anti purseprit you go.
You're all about, you're all in on the.
Speaker 5 (24:20):
I'm in on it, Okay. I tried years ago to
do the like whatever deodorant aluminum free yeah, and then
like the chartroll and all that, but it ruined all
my clothes.
Speaker 4 (24:31):
Yeah, but you haven't tried my homemade version.
Speaker 1 (24:33):
I haven't, but I think I was traumatized because I
had all these It ruined all my like sports pros
and stuff because I would wear it when I would
I was teaching cycling. I was like working out every
single day, and it made these huge white rings on
my armpits around all my nice, like nicer stuff.
Speaker 5 (24:49):
I would teach it and it ruined all my stuff.
Speaker 2 (24:51):
Well, I don't know what brand that is, Like I
haven't had an issue, Yeah, don't. Yeah, maybe they've made improvements,
but I know that everybody's pH their whole. But like
how your body responds to different types of deodorant is
so different for everybody, and everybody sweats differently. But I've
been adding the Witch Hazel. When I get out of
(25:12):
the shower, I'll just put some on a cotton pad
and kind of wipe it under my arms, and it's
helped so much.
Speaker 4 (25:19):
It's like I don't sweat as much.
Speaker 2 (25:21):
Yeah, and then so and then I put like a
little bit of the deodorant my milk and honey one
that I'm not totally loving at the moment. But I
haven't you gone to get all my ingredients.
Speaker 4 (25:30):
To make my own. I have it on my list.
Speaker 2 (25:32):
I need to do that, but some days I'm not
wearing anything because I just do the Witch Hazel.
Speaker 5 (25:37):
So do you work out with yodorant on?
Speaker 2 (25:39):
I haven't been at pilates, but I'm not I don't
really sweat that much at plates. Yeah, sometimes I just
wanna say.
Speaker 5 (25:46):
Don't get the machine next to Amy.
Speaker 2 (25:48):
No, it's not that kind of pilates. It's like a
stretch and I mean we were.
Speaker 4 (25:53):
Working but really hard. It is hard, but I'm not
sweating that much. Like the room's not.
Speaker 5 (25:58):
Hot, I will say, he says. So I like and
like lagree and stuff.
Speaker 1 (26:02):
I like those workouts because you could go there and
then go do something after versus like a lot of
other workouts, like I have to get totally reready and
like take a shower. So that's to good like pre
work if you don't have time to get ready.
Speaker 4 (26:12):
Yes, sir, like you can go another day.
Speaker 5 (26:15):
You said you did your makeup and then went to
plotis and then went to work.
Speaker 2 (26:17):
Yeah, I know. So anyway, that's my Witch Hazel Deodora
situation that nobody asked for. But maybe somebody is in
a similar spot, and hey, I don't know why the
witch Hazel works.
Speaker 4 (26:31):
Probably should look that up, but it's working. Give it
a go, Give it a go. We do have another voicemail.
Speaker 2 (26:38):
This is from Sadie and it is a follow up
to last week's couch Talks. We got an email from
a listener that had some disordered eating behaviors pop up
after she tore her meniscus. And this is a listener
who also tore her meniscus and she's just affirming some
of the advice that we gave and encourage that listener
(27:01):
and maybe other listeners out there that maybe are going
through something similar.
Speaker 4 (27:04):
So this is.
Speaker 6 (27:05):
Sadie a Me and kat I to show. I am
listening to today's episode about the girl who tore herminis
and is having to sit and I actually am a
thirty three year old mom of three who tore my
acl and meniscus. A kid's versus parent soccer game there
(27:26):
and I have it starts the same thing, but I
literally think, like Amy says, what does this make possible?
And so then I after you know, it took a
while of sitting in it to figure out, I may
onto the next thing go go, always wanting to like
the party, do all the things, have everything done, don't
(27:46):
ask for help. Well that's the kind of person I am.
And I've had to step back and slow down and
enjoy the time in and you know, I'm going like
what race can I do? Noxt but whatever? And I've
had to take a step back and it's been actually,
really it was very hard mentally, but it's actually been good.
(28:08):
So thank you for that. And I just want to
tell that listener that you can something from this and
it can teach you something. So listen to Amy and
that because I've been able to get through this because
of that mindset of what is it being possible? What
are the paps of this? What can I do? Now?
(28:29):
Thanks for always bringing positive life to my life. I've
learned a lot to listen to Amy on the Bobby
Bone Show. To this show, you guys put things in
perspective a lot for me.
Speaker 2 (28:41):
So I will say that original question came from Donald Miller,
which I don't know who he credits that originally coming from,
but Kat and I interviewed him a couple of years
ago and he gave us that question of what does
this make possible? And there's studies around that word what
of like versus versus why? Yeah, and how what is
(29:02):
so much more powerful? Like people that use what live
a more fulfilled life?
Speaker 5 (29:08):
That is interesting. I don't know that. Yeah, I know,
just I try to stay away.
Speaker 1 (29:13):
I mean I still say it, but stay away from
why because it feels more accusatory or more negative.
Speaker 4 (29:19):
Yeah, why did this happen to me?
Speaker 5 (29:21):
Versus what does this? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (29:23):
I think the Ted talk I saw on it like
about the fulfillment in life. It was a Ted talk
and one of the examples that was given was like,
you know, if you have an employee that's at odds
with her boss or something. And I'm paraphrasing the whole
thing here, but like you could go to your boss
and be like, why are you treating me this way?
(29:44):
Or why is there this tension? Or why am I
in this position? Instead of here.
Speaker 4 (29:51):
It's like why why? Why?
Speaker 2 (29:52):
When you could go to your boss, or you could
ask yourself like what could I be doing differently? Or
what can I do to add value? What do you
need from me? Or what can we do to resolve this?
Like it sounds very different, just that that that one word.
Speaker 5 (30:09):
Change takes you out of victim.
Speaker 4 (30:12):
Yes, yeah, yeah, which is what Donald Miller.
Speaker 5 (30:16):
Yeah, his whole book.
Speaker 4 (30:17):
Ye, a mission here on a mission. There's a victim,
the villain, the hero. Is there a fourth character?
Speaker 5 (30:26):
That's it?
Speaker 4 (30:27):
Victim, hero, villain.
Speaker 1 (30:29):
Speaking of I talked to you today about we should
talk about drama triangle.
Speaker 5 (30:32):
It's very similar. Yeah, so maybe next couple weeks we'll
talk about that.
Speaker 2 (30:37):
I remember the first time my our couple therapist. It
was when Ben and I were doing couple's therapy. We
were already separated. We were going and our couple therapists
brought out the old white board and the drama triangle.
Speaker 5 (30:50):
Really, it's one of my favorite things to teach.
Speaker 2 (30:53):
Yeah, and I had I mean that was what only
a few years ago. I had never heard of it before,
And in that moment, I was like, oh, I could
think of multiple relationships and scenarios and times where I
had been one of those characters.
Speaker 5 (31:09):
Yeah, and we all I don't want we all do that.
Speaker 4 (31:11):
Yeah, we won't give it away.
Speaker 5 (31:12):
I mean people could google.
Speaker 2 (31:13):
It, but no, no, don't google it because we're going
to talk about it again. You're gonna learn about it
from Cat because she's a licensed therapist and she knows
what she's talking about. Yeah, yeah, so thank you for
the voicemails. We love hearing from y'all. If you want
to call and leave us a voicemail, you can eight
seven seven two o seven two o seven seven teamwork, Yeah,
makes the dream work. And then if you want to
(31:35):
email us, you can for couch talks as well, voicemail
or email, ask a question, share some advice, call her hotline, yeah,
and the email is hey there at feelingthingspodcast dot com.
We are Feeling Things podcast on all the socials and YouTube,
and someone from one of our social clips the other
day commented, like, oh my gosh, I was dying laughing.
(31:57):
It was when I think it was the whenever you
we talked about how your husband wasn't masculine and.
Speaker 4 (32:02):
We were like dying laughing in the social clip.
Speaker 2 (32:04):
Well, they had listened to the podcast and they thought
it was so funny, but then later when they saw
the social clip, they were laughing even more and they
were like, I just subscribe to YouTube because now I
know I need to be watching y'all because this just
made me laugh even more seeing y'all laugh instead of
just hearing you laugh.
Speaker 6 (32:21):
Thank you, so.
Speaker 2 (32:22):
Yeah, like and subscribe and we hope you have the
day you need to have.
Speaker 4 (32:27):
Bye Bye,
Feeling Things with Amy & Kat News
Host
Amy Brown
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