Self Sabotage. Lasting Change. Cost of Skinny. Gratitude.

Author Leanne Ellington is on for all 4things this week! FIRST THING: Amy and Leanne talk about self-sabotage, and how we as humans get in our own heads, and convince ourselves that we are ‘weak willed’, or need to power our way through life. Is there a way to convince yourself out of this mindset? SECOND THING: Leanne breaks down the 5 ingredients of self-imaging, and why think-yourself-positive mantras and short-term motivation doesn’t work for lasting change. THIRD THING: Amy and Leanne talk about the ‘cost of skinny’ and how to un-brainwash yourself from the ‘Diet Mentality’. Leanne tells her insane story about her spine surgery and how she was able to identify, and ‘unbrain’ herself from her relationship with food, her body, and herself. FOURTH THING: Leanne breaks down the importance of gratitude & shares 4 things she’s grateful for! *RadioAmy.com for your own #4things gratitude journal or any #4things + espwa items!!!  

 

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
Okay, cast up little food for yourself life. Ain't. Oh
it's pretty bay, It's pretty beautiful thing that for a

(00:23):
little more kicking with four Happy Thursday, everybody. I hope
you're having a great week. I have a guest on
with me today for All four Things. Her name is
Leanne Ellington and I was introduced to her by my
friend Laura Lee, who's out. Laura Lee balanced on Instagram

(00:45):
if you remember her from the podcast, and maybe you
follow her on Instagram because she has such amazing recipes
and a couple of really awesome cookbooks, and she was
also part of our Outwag series. She was someone that
shared her disordered eating story. So she reached out to
me and said, hey, I really feel like Leanne could
be great for the podcast. So she introduced us Leanne

(01:06):
and I started emailing and then we finally got around
to recording this week. Leanne is an author. She is
a science loving educator, and we'll hear that when we
talk how she brings science into things. And then you'll
also hear in our chat that she is a chocolate
chip cookie connoisseur and she has some amazing recipe and
if she ends up giving it to me, I'll see
if she'll let me share it with y'all too, because

(01:27):
apparently her chocolate chip cookie bar situation concoction that she
puts together is pretty awesome. A Lienn loves to empower women.
I could tell that right away when I met her,
especially since she showed up to my house wearing Empower
Women t actually the one that we sell through the
shop Forward, which my daughter did the artwork for. I
was definitely surprised, but I could tell she wanted to

(01:49):
show up being supportive of what we do and that
was super cool, and I could just see her passion
for wanting to help women change how they feel on
the inside. Maybe we all need to be breaking up
with thoughts that hold us back, and hopefully after you
listen to this, you could maybe pinpoint some thoughts that
you're having that you need to split with. The four

(02:09):
things you're gonna hear us talk about our self sabotage
lasting change, and that's through some self image work. The
cost of skinny, which her story is an interesting one
for sure, as her dad took her to her first
weight Watchers meeting when she was only eight years old,
so she has put in a lot of work to
undo what she was exposed to in the diet world

(02:29):
at an incredibly young age. And lastly, we taught gratitude.
She's got some insight on why it's good for us
from the science side, and then she shares four things
that she is grateful for. So here is my chat
with Leanne, and I hope you enjoy it. Okay, so

(02:49):
let's talk about what's really causing self sabotage. Yeah, you know,
I think it's really first important to identify what self
sabotage is not, you know, so we can then talk
about what it is. You know, I hear from women
all the time and they think like, hey, I'm such
a self sabotage I know what to do, but can't
get myself to do it. And I believe that that's
actually not how it works. Self sabotage doesn't work that
way in the brain. You know, nobody clearly says hey,

(03:11):
I think I'm gonna sabotage myself today, you know. But
what it is is it's something going on higher up
in the brain that's causing us to feel like that.
Because we witness ourselves time and time again say hey,
this time it's going to be different, or I'm going
to start again on Monday, and then we witness ourselves
not falling through on those promises that we keep, or
the promises that we make, because we don't keep them,
and we think, hey, there's something wrong with us. I
must there must be a me problem, you know, and

(03:33):
a lot of women think, you know, especially around the
food and body side of things, like I have a
food problem, I have a body problem, I am weak
willed or willpower problem. But I don't believe it's any
of those things. I think it's what's happening that's actually
causing the self sabotage. So if we can identify what
those are and eliminate the cause, it's the difference between
like identifying that there's a fire and constantly putting the
fire out versus saying, hey, there's a cause of the fire.

(03:55):
Let's address the cause so that the fire stop popping up.
And that's when it leads into what self sabotage actually is.
So what is the girl who cried Wolf part of that?
You know, the girl who cried wolf? I think we
all have that version of ourselves where we're like, Hey,
this time it's gonna be different. This Monday, you know,
I'm gonna start something, and we but we get to
that point where we stop actually telling people about it

(04:16):
because we are afraid that we're gonna get called out on,
you know, not falling through on our promises. That version
of ourselves we all you know, I can speak for myself,
but a lot of women I talk to you pride
ourselves on being really reliable for other people, but when
it comes to ourselves, we just make promises because we
think we should or it's better than not doing anything,
and we end up living in the gray where we're
not really in, but we're not really out, and that's

(04:37):
sometimes gonna be a lot harder, just kind of living
in that gray, and we end up becoming that girl
who cried wolf, which is like, hey, I say I'm
gonna do something and I don't, and we believe ourselves
less and less every single time that happens. It's not benign.
It can actually be really harmful to our self esteem
and self image. So what do we do to break
that pattern? Yeah? For sure, I think the first thing
is just really like identifying the three main things that

(04:59):
I show my client aiance that cause self sabotage and
how we can eliminate those, you know, the first one
would just be, you know, setting yourself up for what
I call a losing game. You know, and the diet
mentality and the weight loss mentality is a great way
to just kind of you know, model this. But you know,
anytime you are dealing with you commit to something and
it's full of restriction, deprivation, punishment, persuading yourself to do

(05:19):
the things that you don't want to do or that
you think you should do, that's a losing game. We
know ourselves, we're never going to follow through on that
long term. It's just it's too much threat to the brain.
We don't enjoy something, we're always going to be forcing
ourselves to white knuckle or will power away through. So
anytime something is you know, again that force, that persuasion,
shaming yourself into doing something, coercing yourself that is going

(05:42):
to affect cause self sabotage or what appears to be
self sabotage, because not even the most you know, willpowered,
strong discipline person can sustain something that that's really unsustainable
long term, we're all going to feel like victim to
self sabotage. So the first thing is really just you know,
not setting yourself up for that losing game. The restriction
that the punishment something that's just super super hard and

(06:04):
gets harder the more you practice it, rather than getting
easier the more you practice it. That's the first thing.
The second thing I would say would be, you can't
outsmart your self image. And we're gonna talk about that more.
But you know you can't out diet it, you can't
out willpower it. So if you have that voice in
your head that's saying, oh, this is just what I do.
I just don't finish the things that I start like,
this is just who I am. I am weak willed,

(06:26):
I am a self sabotager. You can positive motivate and
rab rab yourself to the cows come home. But eventually
that self talk and that self image, the default that's there,
will take over. It will it will win, so to speak.
And so again if the self talk is is going
is counteracting what you're trying to stick with, again, it's
gonna win and you're gonna feel like a self sabotager.

(06:47):
But in reality, you're you've just never addressed the self
talk that's causing you to play out again, the reality
that you've played over in your head. I do that
for sure, but I mean you're saying that, and I
know that the things I repeat to myself over and
over that necessarily aren't getting me anywhere for sure, holding
me yeah, and this is this is never me coming

(07:08):
from some high mountain, even when I talked to my clients,
and it's not like, oh that was so two thousand
and sixteen like address that. You know, this is the
kind of awareness and language that I'll be practicing the
rest of my life because it's such a you know,
a pertinent thing. You know, our thoughts create our outcomes.
Our thoughts create our results, and if we don't align
the two, we're gonna end up, you know, again falling
into that self sabotage trap. But it's not really self sabotage.

(07:29):
It's just our brain, that habitual thought pattern that's just
kind of just doing the same thing over and over again.
I mean, I'm sure you'll get into this when you
tell yourself that lie say. The first one comes to
the head of like, I'm this is just who i am.
I'm always this way, I am this, and it's something negative.
Do you have something you instantly recommend we do to,
you know, and it is a bigger conversation because it's
really committing to shifting the thinking. But one of the

(07:50):
things that distinctions I teach my clients is the data
versus the drama. You know, the drama is where all
the shame, the blame, the guilt, the comparisonitis, the inner
sectionistic thoughts or that's where they live in the drama. So,
just to give you an example, I ate a cookie.
That's just the data, right, I ate a cookie is
the data, It's the reality of what happened. Right. The
drama is that was bad, that was wrong cookie. I'm

(08:13):
a self sabotager. I'm weak will. That's what I do.
It's whatever story meaning added justification is attached to it.
That's where the pain lives, you know. Well, And with
that particular example, and I know you're just giving one
the bummer about foods being labeled good and bad. Is
society has done that for us, So then it's not
even us making up the lie. It's like society has

(08:34):
said no, this is bad, you shouldn't eat this, or
the diet industry, which is totally multi bajillion dollar industry,
and of course they want us to think that some
stuff is good and bad. That's speaking of you know,
we talked about un learning this year. That's something I
have worked super hard to unlearn is that I'm not bad.
The cookie is not bad, and I'm not bad for

(08:55):
eating cookie, absolutely, and it's that unfortunately that main mains
aim I put that in air quotes has become the
air quotes authority, you know. And that's really what I'm
here to do, is it, because it it's not as
simple as there's good foods bad foods. There's no good
foods or bad foods. And it's easy for me to
say that in theory until you shift the paradigm. And
I I call it the diet and weight loss mentality

(09:15):
because it is an entire language. I learned it since
I was eight years old, you know. I's we get
indoctrinated into it, and it takes that kind of like
line in the sand where we have to first. And
this is really the purpose of these four things that
I'm sharing, is like, let's shift the paradigm. If we
keep practicing more of that same conversation, we're gonna be
in that level of consciousness and in turn, the solution

(09:36):
that we really need is not going to live in
that conversation. It's like the way I described the diet
and weight loss mentality. People think they want to get
better at it, but in reality it is the problem.
So what we really need is to hold learn a
whole different language, a new paradigm. And unfortunately a lot
of the health and weight loss and wellness world isn't
really talking about that. They're having conversations about the same things,

(09:59):
like there are new no food, good foods and bad
foods within the context of the same paradigm. So the
conversation doesn't change, and the only way the game can
change is when we change the conversation. It's not enough
to just acknowledge. We have to actually make those shifts
in our brain. And just like you, I was Indoctrinata
into it too. So it's a hard shift to make.
But the first step is becoming aware that the language
and the paradigm of thinking that we're using is the problem.

(10:22):
It's not the problem and the good and bad cookie
that was the example, but any language we're saying in
our head that if we're repeating it, and that becomes
the mantra. If it's negative, then that's the problem. Exactly
that the drama lives in the judgment. So you asked,
what's the easiest way to shift it. The easiest way
to shift it is look for the drama. Bring yourself
back to the data. Look for the drama. Bring yourself

(10:42):
back to the data. You know. And I work with
moms too. Oh I was late to pick up my kid.
That's the data. The drama is I'm a bad mom?
What's wrong with me? All that? It's like, no, the
data is I was late. Well yeah, but then that
also like the other day, and it actually did open
up a in the words and drama because I think
for me and our family right now, we're working on

(11:04):
consistency and predictability, and then being late can cause like
the kinds of unknown issues. But that's that's for us.
Other day, what's the next thing that stage? Yeah, for
self sabact, I was just gonna say, like, what's causing
it would just be And this is really the big one.
This is if it's wired in your brain. So especially
when it comes to where I noticed this again, showing

(11:24):
up as an effect in a symptom is like one
of the first things I do with my clients is
we do a brain on it, and it's a distract
and part of it as a distraction on it, like
how much time are you spending mindlessly, eating, mindlessly scrolling
through Facebook and Instagram, numbing out on Netflix, online shopping,
drinking wine, whatever it is that we use to distract, numb, procrastinate,
or just it's an emotional stress kind of you know,

(11:46):
really emotionally triggering thing that we're using to number distract.
There's a brain thing going on. You can't out willpower that,
white knuckle yourself through it. There is what our brains
are actually looking for is this oxytocin, and we're giving
endless amounts of dope mean, and so we're being overfed
yet undernourished, and what we really need is this like
social emotional connection in our brain. And so again you

(12:08):
can't outsmart and out you know, willpower the wiring in
your brain, and less that gets addressed, you're going to
constantly show up as if you're a self sabotager. But
it's just your brain doing its thing. So you're confirming
to us because I fully believe this, but I think
it's hard for people to grasp at times it was
for me. We can rewire our brains absolutely neuroplasticity, says it.
I mean, and any age that they used to think

(12:30):
like after a certain age, you couldn't. It's like, no,
the brain is this multiple, pliable, plastic thing that we
become what we practice. One of my favorite quotes about
how the brain works is our brain becomes whatever it
rests on. You know. So when my brain is resting
on Netflix and mindless eating, like it's it's a mush
of emotion, of shame of all these things. But when I,

(12:52):
you know, radically take ownership of my emotional health and
take ownership of the thoughts that create the feelings that
create the outcomes that I, you know, am creating day
and day out, that's when everything shifts. And and by
the way, this again like I used to be such
a victim to my circumstances. I used to be this
person that's like life is just happening to me and
my my body is just who I am, and like
all this extra weight, like this is just who you are.

(13:13):
Lean or these struggles that I had with food and
like my you know, addictions to sugar and my disordered eating,
I was like great and and I lived as this
victim to my circumstances because I didn't know what I
didn't know, and I didn't have the awareness of changing
my thoughts. And I know changing your thoughts is and
as sexy as hey go drop ten pounds in ten minutes,
But it's like we're talking about lifelong transformation here, and
nobody wants short term change that they just give back
because they can't sustain it anymore and think there are

(13:34):
self sabotagers. So all of this is just coming from
my experiences of like all the stuff that didn't work,
all the things that left me in my own food
and body and shame, prison and just really what again?
Radical ownership and taking responsibility but also knowing what it
is it's causing it is huge. Yeah, And then I
think accepting to which society then defines this is what

(13:55):
you should look like. And when when you realize and
can accept that every buddies bodies are so different and
that there is not this is the normal and or
this is what you should be striving towards, you can
get that part out. I just think of like brain clutter,
when you're cluttered with that's my goal. If you really
do want mental clarity and to stop self sabotaging in

(14:17):
whatever area. So for now we're talking about body image stuff.
I think that ditching that part of it then gives
you that freedom to be like, Okay, I do want
to work on me being a better person. And if
that means I end up in a pair of jeans,
it's five sizes bigger than I thought, or who knows,

(14:38):
two sizes smaller than where I was, So be it, absolutely,
because that's what I would get stuck on. Well, this
is what we're I'm trying to look like, this is
what I'm supposed to look like. And then when I
let that go, all the other stuff. Sorry, it made
room in my brain for all this other more important
work because I was focused on the wrong things. At
least I too. I want that to be a message

(14:59):
of normalizing all the bodies. Yes, absolutely, And it's one
of those things like we another part that we got
indoctrinated into is like we either have to be like
skinny or happy, healthy or happy, you know, hungry or overweight.
I mean, it's just like all these ores and it's like, no,
I want to be happy and healthy, and oftentimes why
I'm so passionate about the weight loss mentality and the

(15:20):
diet mentality and kind of acknowledging that it is a
mentality that really it's it's a disordered thought process, and
the acceptance movement is is huge, but it's like, how
do we get there? One of the reasons it's so
dangerous is because when we move towards weight loss, we're
actually nine times out of ten moving away from happiness
and away from health and what do we want at
the end of the day. The reason people think they
want to lose weight is because they think they'll be

(15:41):
happy and have freedom and have peace of mind. But
usually the diet mentality just takes them in the direction
of being in a prison and unhappiness. Yeah, and it's like,
get what you want, and what you think you want
is to be skinny and fit and lean and all that.
It's like, no, you want who who you want to
be at the end of that rainbow. But if you
practice being the version of yourself that shame herself, blames herself,
you know, moves an opposite direction of health and happiness.

(16:03):
What you see is who you be, Like, you'll take
that with you and trust me, I got that really
skinny lean bod and I was miserable, you know, And
it really is that it's an inner job. As as
cheesy as it sounds, it's it's really is, you can't
outsmart yourself image. Well, the next thing I want to
get into speaking of she brought that up is the
five ingredients of self imaging, So we'll do that next. Okay,

(16:29):
five ingredients of self imaging? What you got for us? Yeah, So,
you know, one of the things is that, like, like
we're talking about, when the last thing we think we
want to be look a certain way, have a certain
amount of money, a certain relationship status, all these things
outside of us, right, and then if you're anything like me,
you get those things and you don't do the inner work,
and it's all empty and meaningless at the end of
the day. If you're not who you want to be,

(16:50):
or if you hate who you have to be to
get there, what you have to do to get there.
So one of the things that came out for me was,
you know, kind of after I left the fitness industry,
I gave my self permission to just get right with
food and get right with my body. And I'm like,
why is it that I have, you know, built successful
businesses and have this body that I thought I wanted
in this amazing lifestyle and you know, the all the recognition,

(17:10):
and I was on TV and like all this stuff,
and I'm like, why do I feel empty and meaningless?
There's a number of things that let me to this,
but I had this realization that I never made over
my self image, and so a lot of you know,
self help and motivational stuff gave me some good tools,
but I really knew that there was some deep down
beliefs that don't just go away after decades of thinking it.
So I started becoming this kind of mad scientists of

(17:31):
the self image. And you know what I came up
with was the holes for me, Like where is that
gap between who I know I want to be and
who I'm witnessing myself time and time again showing up
as no matter how many times I say, no, this
is the last time I'm gonna do differently, there was
something I couldn't outwork. And the other side of it
is self love felt a little freely to me for

(17:51):
a while because it stayed very logical. It's like, you know,
love yourself no matter what and accept yourself no matter what.
And I love that in theory but it's like, wait
a minute, I've been shaming myself for thirty years, Like
how do you just automatically start loving yourself because the
world tells you to write? So I needed to make
it more practical, applicable for myself and my law. I
call it like science with a splash of woo, Like

(18:11):
I love the woo woo, but I needed some some logic,
brain science based stuff. And so as I was going
through the self image, kind of the science of it
and looking at the way the female brain is wired
and a lot of my stuff is skewed towards the
female brain because I am my own first client, like
I just needed to figure out. I call it owning
my own crazy. Um is how I help other people
own theirs. And when I say crazy, I mean we're

(18:32):
not crazy, We're just human, but we feel like it's sometimes.
So the five ingredients are self acceptance, and we'll talk
about that, self care, self esteem, self worth, and self endorsement.
And I'll just quickly take you through all five of
those and you can ask me anything that feels curious
for you. Self acceptance is you know, it's twofold. It's
accepting yourself where you are the weight that you are,

(18:54):
like wherever you are in life, but without all that shame,
without all that blame, without all that comparisonite, without all
that perfectionism. So much easier said than done. But you know,
the question I asked people is like, what's the alternative?
Right Everywhere you are right now is where you are
right now. One of my favorite quotes is, when you
argue with reality, you suffer. So when you argue with

(19:15):
where you are currently, you suffer. When you argue with
your weight, you suffer. Right So any alternative to accepting
where you are and who you are right now, you're
going to be constantly living in the past. And the
solution doesn't happen in the past. Solution happens here and
in the future. So you're automatically gonna be problem focused
rather than solution focus. But here's the other side of
self acceptance that people don't talk about, because I think
a lot of people talk about accepting who you are,

(19:37):
But you don't always have to like where you are
right now. You're allowed to want to say, hey, you
know what, there's a version of me that I would
feel better in my body, feel better in my accomplishments,
all those things like you're allowed to desire to want
more for yourself, but don't shame yourself in the meantime
while you're here. And I think that's what a lot
of like self acceptance movements are saying, is like, no,

(19:57):
you're not allowed to want to change your body. You're
not allowed to change yourself because that means you're not
accepting yourself. And I think it's the difference between like
loving and liking yourself. I can love myself and and
prefer to be a version of myself that serves me.
So the other side of self acceptances accepting that you
don't have to accept where you are right now, but
stay in the love conversation while you get there. Gotcha. Yes,

(20:20):
I've used that before, but not on myself. I've used
that to a family member or your spouse or you know.
I love you, but I just don't like you right now. Absolutely,
But we just need to continue to love ourselves and
stay the course. Yeah. Absolutely, and except where we are
because when we argue with the reality of it, we're
focusing on problems and that's where the suffering comes in. Yeah,

(20:40):
So that's self acceptance. Self care is three dimensional, you know,
a lot of people are talking about self care right now,
like it's a food and fitness thing, like it's a
bubble bath thing, like it's a journaling thing. And that's
definitely part of it. But the paradigm I teach my
clients is I teach p M S. It's physical, it's mental,
and it's social emotional, social emotional. I'll come back to you.
But it's that part of the brain that we that

(21:01):
that shows up what when we're talking about in the
thing one about that mindless eating and mindless consuming, mindless scrolling,
it's that social brain that we're actually looking for connection
and oxytocin, but we're feeding it lots of dopamine and
like short term gratification. But I'll come back to that.
So physical, mental, and social emotional. Physical is like what
do you need physically to take care of yourself? My

(21:22):
definition of take care of yourself is is your nervous
system healthy. The nervous system is the queen of everything,
or the king if you're a man listening, and it's
basically the system of every system in our body. So, however,
the nervous system is reacting right now, whether it's nervous
or whether it's relaxed and at ease. It dictates like
what branch of your nervous system you're in, but it

(21:44):
also dictates every system below it. So gastro intestinal system
is affected, adrenal's, cardiovascular system, musculo skeletal system, respiratory system.
I could go on and on and on. Your nervous
system is the queen or king of your of your
brain and your body. And so if you're constantly that
you know, sympathetic branch of your nervous system, it doesn't
matter what you eat or how much you move if

(22:06):
you're not really addressing it from the head on. So
physical self care is like what do you need to
take care of yourself on a physiological level, getting yourself
out of pain? I mean everything. And it's again, it's
not a weight loss conversation. Like we said before, a
lot of times, the weight loss takes us away from
that direction of health. Yeah, very true. We had a
doctor on our Outweigh series that I hear him in

(22:27):
my head all the time saying over and over that
the anxiety that we put when we're debating whether or
not we should eat something, or the stress we feel
after we've eaten it if we're playing the blame game
and different things, all of that is releasing more harmful
chemicals or whatever in our body than the actual food

(22:49):
that we consumed. Absolutely, yeah, you know, I see. And
this actually trickles down into the mental and social emotional
cascade as well, because I talked about the tail of
two cookies all the time and basically noticed that theam
of chocolate chip cookies always is. And my examples shows
you where my love of food is. But if I
eat a chocolate chip cookie and I'm eating it with
peace and freedom and enjoying the deliciousness of it and

(23:10):
connecting with my friends or family while I eat it,
I'm in that relaxed branch of my nervous system, and
all system of systems are firing optimally, gastro intestinals firing optimally.
You know, I'm producing you know, dopamine and serotonin and
oxytocin and muscular skeletally. I'm relaxed, and my my respiratory
system is relaxed. Versus same cookie, no different. The data

(23:30):
is I ate a cookie, but if the drama is
shame like I shouldn't eat that, that's bad or this
is wrong or this is what I do. I'm in
that sympathetic branch of my nervous system cortisol, adrenaline, epinephrin.
My muscles are contracted, my breath is you know, you know,
not optimally firing. My gastro intestinal system is shut down
because it thinks I'm running from a saber tooth tiger,
like two totally different cascades that are happening based on

(23:52):
the thoughts that we're thinking. So what I say all
the time is it's not what you're doing, it's who
you're being while you're doing the doing that determines how
things process or don't. Like, you're better off eating the
chocolate chip cookie with peace than a kale salad in distress.
So the P was your physical what is it M?
And M is mental? So really just like all the
spinning plates that are in your mind and like typical

(24:14):
stresses in your life, you know, are you taking care
of that like it's part of your health? A lot
of people aren't. They look at stress as last and
mental mental duress as last, and they don't even think
of it because again it's not in this fitness and
food conversation, so they're not even thinking about it. When
it comes to self care. And then the third would
be that social emotional how much are you taking care
of your emotional brain and your social emotional brain. Are

(24:35):
you isolated lonely? All of those things are not benign.
Just like we just talked about in the tail of
two cookies, feelings, emotions are not benign. Sadness and mental
stress and distress. You're in that stress branch of your
nervous system, and they all overlap. So let's say I'm eating,
I'm even exercising when I'm already sympathetic dominant, and I'm
all stressed out, and I go do a really high
intensity like exercise or circuit. I think it's good. Oh,

(24:58):
it's you know, adrenaline all that, But it's like, no,
it's actually a lot of threat to the nervous system
and a lot of stimulus to the nervous system. You're
better off walking, taking a bath, breathing when you're in
that distress for being still exactly, it's interesting to think
of the science behind why not doing anything might be
the best thing you could do for yours. Absolutely one
of your like the best weight loss plans you want

(25:19):
to go on. I call it a stress diet like
you take rid of get rid of all the physical, mental,
and social emotional stress in your life. If there's weight
that's being held onto because your nervous systems holding onto it,
it'll release it. Like it really is just science, you know.
The food and fitness have a part, you know. Don't
get me wrong, don't hear what I'm not saying, you know,
but it definitely is such a bigger picture than that,
and I wish the world was talking about it from that,

(25:40):
you know, top down approach. My therapist told me that
self care for me is maybe just sitting down and
watching an episode of Real Housewife. Yes, absolutely, because it
just her. I don't know, that's my brain turns my
brain off and I can just sit there and watch it.
And I don't always get to do it, but even

(26:00):
some other shows or that my husband and I like
to watch, it's totally different. That's not necessarily necessarily self care.
But if I have an opportunity alone for thirty minutes,
and I can sit and do that, because even with books.
Right now, I'm just constantly reading parenting books and or
listening to audio books and mentally taking notes, and I
feel like my brain is a million different directions, so

(26:22):
just to be able to shut it off. And I
would have never looked at that as self care. I
would look at that as just like a guilty habit
or a guilty pleasure. Sorry that I shouldn't. I shouldn't
be sitting here watching Real Households. I don't have time
for this. But actually I've been given permission and that's
the thing I need to do it. Yeah, that's why
I also want to make the disclaimer of like all

(26:44):
these things that I'm talking about, they're so personal, Like
I can't tell you what your self care plan is.
You have to become an advocate and become your own
expert and figure out what that is. And it's the
distinction like one episode of Real Housewives or even two
or whatever it is to just shut your brain off.
It's a tool of entertainment and relaxation and all that
versus if you watch ten of them, then it's a
weapon of mass distraction. And us just knowing the distinction,

(27:05):
because that's what the product of, like putting a blanket
statement around Real Housewives and saying it's bad or it's
you know, a guilty pleasure. That's where we get the judgment.
It's like, no, it's not it's my it's my self
care for today. And that's why nobody can tell you
what your self care plan is, and anybody that tries
to tell you what's best for you run fast and
far nice. What's after self care? Yeah, so um self esteem.

(27:26):
I call it the no like trust factor. Most women
are just walking around not trusting themselves because they've lost
trust in themselves. They've witnessed themselves kind of like the
girl who cried Wolf, you know, making promises that they
can't keep, don't have any intention of keeping, or like
don't want to keep. You know, they're making them because
they think they should. And every time we do that,
it's not benign. We believe ourselves less and less. And

(27:46):
so I think falling in like and falling like the
no like trust factor. Get to know yourself, which is
what we're doing right now. These awarenesses I call him awareness.
Awareness is meaning like having the awareness that you have
the ability to have an awareness of these things you know,
and then falling back and trust with yourself. Trusting yourself
is that. One of the first things I do with
my clients is like, where have you lost trust with
yourself and bridging that gap, because that's where we're out

(28:07):
of integrity with ourselves. That's what I call self esteem.
We've been going over trust a lot in our house
because I want to make sure, like, hey, I I
trust you, you have that. There's something about when you
can trust somebody else, there's comfort there. So I can
imagine if we're not trusting ourselves, how uncomfortable, and we
can reflect it outwards, like we can project on other

(28:28):
people our lack of a trust of ourselves. Like, really,
if I were to bottom line the trust factor, it's
like the promises you make and the promises that you keep.
Like if you just monitor those two things and you
like commit to being absolutely an integrity with those two things,
your self esteem will just go through the roof. If
all you do is monitor your promises. Yeah, easier said
than done. Yeah, you know, I'm school. I'm coaching myself
all the time, Like this is me talking to me too,

(28:48):
you know so? And then yeah, the fourth one is
self worth, like know what you're weighing, Know what you're measuring.
I grew up with a currency of when I lose
a certain amount of weight or when I weigh a
certain amount, gene size, how many push ups I can do,
money in my bank account, relationship sat is, how many
calories a that day. Like we're weighing and measuring ourselves,
but all these external factors, and by the way, those
can be really powerful tools. It's not like totally stop

(29:10):
weighing and measuring yourself by those things. But no, when
they're a tool, and no, when they're a weapon of comparison,
shame all those things and then create a currency that
actually reflects who you want to be. And that again
is just a rewiring of thinking and shifting what you're
weighing and what you're measuring. That's my definition of self
worth because when I was just weighing my weight and

(29:31):
you know, clients or likes on Facebook, you name it,
like I've weighed and measured them all. It's empty and
meaningless and it doesn't give you what you think it
will give you unless you really have that inner, inner
knowing and love. And I'll just take this opportunity to
to remind people that that's why we should never compliment
someone's body. Yeah, it's a tricky subject and like you're
talking about earlier, can be triggering. Yeah, because it's like

(29:52):
that's if that's what someone is using to weigh their worth,
then when you compliment it, then they are like, okay, yeah,
I'm I'm worth more now, so I gotta keep going
totally yeah okay. The fifth the fifth thing I call
it self endorsement. So you hear people say like, oh,
I don't care what other people think about me, Not
really possible. We're wired to care what other people think

(30:15):
about us. We have that same part of the brain
it's called the A C C, but it's it's specifically
dedicated to looking around and seeing what I call third
party awareness. Do they like me, do they accept me?
Do they connect with me? Do they think I'm cool?
It's that social brain. Interestingly enough, it's actually bigger in
the female brain. It's one of the differences between the
male and the female brain. Of the male and female

(30:36):
brain genetically are the same, but it's that one percent
difference that makes a massive difference why women are told
they're more emotional or where they're hard on their sleeves.
We physiologically have a bigger emotional pain center in our brain,
so we're wired to look for what other people think
of us more. That's why I believe that the self
imaging work is actually, I don't want to say, more
important for women. But that's why I'm you know, more

(30:56):
purposeful about bringing it to women because we kind of
need it more. But self endorsement. What's not possible is
not caring what other people think about us. What is
possible is caring what you think and say and feel
about yourself, if not more as much as what other
people think about you, and writing your own narrative endorse like,
endorse yourself, validate yourself. People think that that is like

(31:18):
you know, cocky or or you know, superficial or I'm bragging,
but it's like no knowing again crossover with self worth,
knowing your worth and being able to be a stand
for who you are unapologetically. And nobody taught that to me.
I was always looking like, hey, do they think I'm cool? Okay,
I must be cool. Do they think I'm an expert
at what I'm talking about? Okay, I must be an expert.

(31:39):
DoD they think I'm beautiful? Okay, I must be beautiful.
And that's a losing game. It's fleeting, it doesn't work,
um and it's no fun at the end of the day. Okay, Yeah,
I'm yeah, I'm taking notes. I see some people do
it beautifully. I see some people do it in a
sort of a tacking. I'm like, oh, get over yourself.
But some people I am envious of their confidence and
how much they even themselves and they are their best

(32:02):
self promoter for sure. Ever, and we all need a
little cheerleader, you know, squad in our in our back
behind us. We all need that support. But it's when
we when we rely on it, that I think things
can get in trouble and we can't produce it for ourselves.
And I get it to like if confidence is compartimentalized,
and you know, we're confident in one area and again
this is always this is just what I'm working on
the rest of my life. I think these that's the

(32:23):
other misconception of all this self image stuff. It's like
one and done. No, It's like, to me, this is
a lifelong game, like new level, new devil. I don't
deal with like the food, you know, disordered eating anymore,
but like I have other coping mechanisms or I have
other you know, holes in my self image. And the
cool thing about it is when you look at yourself
through the lens of your self image. It always grows

(32:43):
and evolves as you do, and you can just keep
shifting it. Well. Love that, And next I want to
get into back to the diet mentality unbrainwashing ourselves, and
we'll get into a little bit more of your story
with the cost of skinny and what you had to
go through. Okay, So while I had a needing disorder

(33:11):
and crazy unhealthy relationship with food for sure for many
many years of my life, I don't know that it
resulted in anything like you had going on. How in
the world did you end up with back surgery? Yeah, ironically,
So I lost all this weight and then got into
the fitness industry and was this you know, air quotes
expert for in the fitness world, and I was on

(33:33):
TV and newspapers and people think it was like, Oh,
she was carrying around all this extra weight, that's how
she heard her back. It's like, No, I was actually
at the height of my career and I was in
great shape when I injured my spine. And you asked
ten different doctors what they think happened, and they'll give
you ten different answers. But I think what happened was,
first of all, I think if I knew then what
I knew now, I could have avoided it. But I'm

(33:54):
also grateful that it happened, because I wouldn't be able
to be here having this conversation with you if it didn't.
You know, there was a greater purpose in it. But
basically I was this sedentary couch potato kid teenager. Brought
it with me into adulthood. I never discovered exercise until
I was in my mid twenties. I was in chorus
and your book to Avoid Pe. So what I did
was as an adult, I never had these like functional

(34:15):
movement patterns or like the patterns that athletic kids have
growing up. So I went and got really you know
fit and lean on top of a very unstable body.
It first manifested itself with a little bit of shoulder
pain that I felt was maybe like an injured rotator cuff,
and then it turned into debilitating back pain that it

(34:35):
was about four years in between my first spell of
pain and my actual surgery, where I did everything I
could to avoid it, you know, pain management. You know,
we did the X rays of the m R. I
s all that, and nobody could really address a direct cause.
To be honest, basically it culminated and it got to
the point where like I needed an emergency surgery because
it was not getting better, and and there was a

(34:56):
lot of basically calcified hard and nerve fluid sitting on
or this clue is sitting on my nerves, so they
need to get in there. So the surgery was a success,
but I actually had a lot of neurological struggles afterwards,
Like the left side of my body and the right
side of my body felt different, I cognitively, emotively. The
way I described it as like the lights went off
when I went under anesthesia, and I was just different
when I came back on, Like I felt more physically

(35:17):
and emotionally. I just processed things different. I had like
balance issues. I was scared. You know, it's twenty five
at the time, and I was like, what is my
body going to be like at nine? And so I
had to become my own advocate. And basically, you know,
physical therapy, you know, muscular skeletal stuff like didn't help
I need. I knew something inside me was like this
is a nerve thing. So I went and you know,

(35:38):
studied the nervous system, the physical which led me to
the mental and emotional, and it's causing us to have
these conversations now. But I realized, like literally that that
weight loss mentality the harder, faster, more, no pain, no gain.
I just wasn't listening to my body. What my body
was telling me to do was like slow down, get functional,
probably go eat a sandwich land like get some bread
and you get some you know, carves in you. I was.

(35:59):
It was just a combination of just like I had
not healed my struggle with food, and I was depending
on exercise to outburn what I was eating. And I
knew that if I stopped, I would gain weight, and
I would have rather like dealt with an injury at
the time. That's just who I was, then go gain weight.
It was a part of my disordered thinking. But you know,
the dysmorphic relationship with my body, like no matter how

(36:21):
thin I got, you know, I call it the face
off between my fat head and my skinny head. I
had this awareness at a photo shoot for a magazine
I was contributing to Fitness, our ex magazine at the time.
They were like wanting me to share my before and
after story, long story, a little less long. My editor
kind of double dog dared me to do a bikini shoot,
and I had this breakdown like a week out from
the bikini shoot, where I was just like the leanest

(36:41):
I'd ever been, like looking at the mirror at my
like toned arms and my flat tummy and all the
things I thought I wanted, and I was just hysterical
because that's when I knew nothing had shifted. I call
it the face off between my fat head and my
skinny head, like I literally had that's when all the
self imaging stuff really, you know, surface for me. So
you know, it's this prison where it's a prison of
thinking like it's never enough, like never skinny enough, never

(37:02):
fit enough, never successful enough, and it is a cost,
you know. And again, if you keep looking at it
like the weight is the thing that you want, or
the weight loss and diet mentality is the thing you
want to get good at, You're going to keep practicing
more of the problem. So when it comes to like
you know, other people really identifying because I believe and
this is a blanket statement, but and I'm generalizing, but

(37:22):
I truly believe it is like if you have gotten
indoctrinated into the weight loss mentality of the diet mentality.
There is a cost of skinny, and that's why I'm
just here to create that awareness of like what's yours.
And I find that they fall into a couple of
different categories, you know, and this really just reflects mine.
The first one is like your relationship with food. I
call it a food prison. So is it restriction, deprivation, counting, weighing,

(37:44):
you know, micromanaging every carb you eat, fat, protein, all
that versus you know, this idea of freedom and listening
to your body and knowing when you're why you're eating,
and who you're being while you're eating it. And really
that's a healing your relationship with food conversation, you know.
The second prison is this this body prison. You know.
It can come in a different couple of different fashions
where you feel like the insides don't match the outside,
the actual body image, like what you're saying to yourself

(38:07):
and about your body. Um. But also a lot of
women are living in this pain prison because their sedentary
and their doctors like, hey, you need to go lose weight,
and they're like, wait, I just went to an exercise
class and hurt myself. And it's this ficious cycle, like
they can't go run a five k. So there's a
pain prison and a big population of women that are
suffering in that, you know, and it's a self fulfilling
prophecy kind of which. Back to the doctor that was

(38:27):
on our Outweigh special, he's a doctor who he used
to say that to patients and he's like, I had
no place telling any of my patients they needed to
go lose weight. He's like, I was actually contributing to
the problem. So anyways, Yeah, it's a great because if
anybody ever is telling you that, I would try to
go see a new doctor exactly, somebody that actually advocates
for you and what you need and ask you the

(38:48):
questions that you need. But that's an example of a
body prison. But also like what I call waiting for
the weight, Like when I lose the weight, then I'll
get in a bathing suit. When I lose the weight,
then I'll go hang out with my children and you
know outside. When I lose the eight then I'll go
for the job that I want, the relationship I want.
It's waiting for the weight, and that's a body prison
of itself. You're missing life, it's passing you by. Do
you follow the bird's papaya. Yeah, she's such a great

(39:11):
example of not wanting to miss life's moments because she's
not gonna let There was a time in her life
where she would have missed swimming with her kids because
she was worried about how she looked in a bikini
and cellulide in this and that, blah blah blah. And
now she's just out there rocking it and is such
an encouragement. So I agree. I'm so inspired by her.
Same say, the other two prisons to just be aware of,

(39:33):
you know that, like social and relationship prison. Like I
can't even tell you how many women I talk to
you that their weight is a third wheel in their
relationship with their partner, with their kids, Like who they're
being in front of their children about their weight? Where
is it affecting you relationally? But also just like missing
out on social things like oh, I can't go there
because there will be food there, or there I can't
eat that, or like what if people see me in

(39:54):
a bathing suit or shorts or whatever, And it's just
like this social prison. You know, that's the other cost
of skinny, the last cost of skinny that I want
to bring awareness to I think it's the most important one.
It's your relationship with yourself. You know, for me, my
emotional home as in like this was my identity, these
rerely goggles I saw myself through. My emotional home was fat.
Even though that's not a feeling, I made it a feeling.

(40:16):
My emotional home was shame and you know, self abandonment
and self rejection and and criticism and and you know, comparisonitis.
Like that was my emotional home. That was my cost
of skinny because I was so focused on who I
wasn't and focus on And by the way, it would
have never been enough. I would have never been skinny enough.
It wouldn't have mattered because my identity was fat. And

(40:36):
so those are the four main prisons that I invite
people to look out for. Is the food prison, a
body prison like kind of social and relational prison. And
then your own emotional home what what where do you
spend the majority of your time emotionally? And I know
for you, the wait stuff started early and wasn't even
your fault. And well, I think a lot of listeners
don't know. When you think of how you are as

(40:57):
a parent and what you're projecting onto your children in
I think of how I did some harmful things. I've
only been a mom almost three years now because we
adopted and they're older. So my daughter even remember, she's
seen the shift in me and how I wouldn't allow
certain foods and how I ate one way and then
now how I'll have ice cream with them. She notices
that different. Or if we're at the store and I

(41:18):
allow certain candies to be their chips to be thrown
in the car that I would have never allowed, and
she's like, you're so different than you used to be.
I would have never thought you would have let us
buy that. And so it's you know, it's not just
affecting you, it's affecting those around you. And I know,
for you quickly, just share the butter story from when
you were eight years old, right, I remember, you know,

(41:38):
my dad took me to weight watchers when I was
either seven or eight. I was in third grade. My
brother and I were making omelets in the kitchen and
he saw us using the whole stick a better because
we just didn't know. And my dad, I just have
to say, is he's my biggest champion, my biggest fan.
Now and the drama used to be my dad caused
me to gain weight. The data is no, he took
me to weight watchers. Um, so he took me to
weight watchers because he was scared I was going to

(41:58):
turn out like him. He just loving me the best
way he could. But I didn't know that at the time,
and I developed a lot of daddy issues around it.
You know that I had to go heal. And that's
another thing when I talk about like taking radical ownership
and responsibility. I talked to a lot of women. You know,
the majority of the women I work with are in
their forties, fifties, and sixties, and you know, some of
them are living in a narrative where it's like, well
this is how I'm going to because my mom did

(42:20):
this to me, or like I had a horrible childhood.
And there is absolutely know love and compassion for our past,
and we have to at some point in time take
ownership for who are being right now. It's not to
dismiss what happened to us, but when it comes to
the narrative of us taking ownership and healing something, we
have to, I believe, take ownership of what we have

(42:40):
the ability to do now and focusing on you know
what we didn't get from our families or what was
done to us, you know, with our story around food
or whatever. Um. Although it can be really powerful to
just you know, resolve that, it's also very problem focused
and again your solution lives on the other side, you know.
So that's the other thing. A lot of women I
work with had eric was done to them. And here,

(43:02):
at the end of the day, parents are just doing
the best they can with what they got and trying
to love their kids, you know. And I have clients
that come to me and say, hey, I've noticed my
daughter is gaining weight, And the first thing I say
to them is you have to become who you want
to model to them. That's the solution to that is
become the model of what you want them to learn.
It's not about what you say, it's about what you do.
Just like your daughter's noticed, she didn't notice that the food.

(43:24):
She noticed the care free version of you. She noticed
the freedom version of you that was like, hey, this
is delicious, We're going to enjoy this together. And it
was the energy that she really noticed. And then I'm
sure she put those words to it, but she first
noticed that energy from you and you both win. You
get to be that version of yourself as a mom,
and she gets you as a mom because you're modeling it.
It's just who That's what I mean by who you're being.

(43:45):
That was you not just doing a doing. It was
you being a different version of yourself. And that's what
reacted in you doing differently. That's huge, this version of me. Yes, well,
you're doing the work I hear. I mean you really are.
You're asking the questions and it's we're all on that journey.
It's a lifeline journey. Okay, So as we do with

(44:10):
a lot of guests, Lean, I'm gonna have you share
four things that you're grateful for, and just gratitude is
something we have got to focus on always. I'm not
the best at it, but I mean that's why Mary
and I tried to make our own four things Gratitude journal,
and we'll not tried. We did, and but we wanted
to make it simple. But I have some listeners that

(44:31):
are like, I don't even want to do that. I
don't want to write anything down. So my challenge to
everyone listening is, after you hear Leanne, share hers like,
what's your plan to practice gratitude today. Can you make
a list of four if you don't want to write
them down, or if you already have a four things journal,
go grab it and and do yours. Whether it's morning, afternoon, night,
find a time. But some people I'll share what they've

(44:53):
emailed in is they just kind of popcorn do it
throughout the day, like four random times. They're intentional about
noticing and speaking out loud. I am thankful for this.
Oh wow, look at this right now. I'm very thankful
for this moment. And then they get there four throughout
the day and then they start over again the next
day if they can. So it's not anything that you
have to write down, I'll do. I think there is

(45:14):
power in writing it, and I have noticed that in myself.
But if you're just easing in or dip in your
toe in the gratitude pool, and you know, I think
right now, with where we are in this season, rough
as it is, there's a lot going on, but we're
entering election time and we have to take care of ourselves.
There's a lot of negativity out there, and I just

(45:38):
wanted to be Christmas time. I want the election to
be over, but take care of yourself. If you are
watching the news, limit your news. If you are noticing
a bunch of politics stuff on Instagram, monitor how long
you're on there. Make sure you're following diverse things. You're
not just inundated by one side or following hateful people
spewing this and that about either side. I don't care

(45:59):
which one it is. Let's take care of ourselves doing
these times and choose to be kind and then also
focus on what we can do for ourselves. And you know,
gratitude is something you can do for yourself. So with
that said, lean and also I want to point out
I'm thankful. It was really cool when I opened the
door and we had never met before, but I opened
the door and Leanne is wearing an Empowered Women Empower

(46:20):
Women shirt that my daughter Stashira design, which is so awesome.
And when Mary and I were putting that together, we
wanted a way to give back to organizations that are
supporting women and girls all around the world. So that
is cool that you have that on. It's one of
the what I think about this show and what you're
doing really well. Thank you. So that warmed my heart

(46:43):
and then I just think of Stashira my daughter and
how she did such a great job, so I'm thankful
for her. To see. Then it's like a domino. Then
you can be like, oh, and then I'm thankful for
and then I think of her soccer game this week,
and I'm thankful for her soccer coach, and like it's you.
It's I know, sometimes it seems daunting, but you can
think of the things. So that said, I would like

(47:04):
to hear what you are thankful for? Yeah, and just
a quick little kind of caveat about that. You know.
I also used to struggle with the whole gratitude thing.
I thought I was doing it wrong, Like it became
a shopping list almost for me, you know, And so
the distinctions that came for me are really just like,
first of all, what's the alternative If I'm not in gratitude,
I'm in lack. I'm thinking about what I don't have,
who I'm not being, what's not working, what where I'm

(47:25):
not enough? You know? And it really is talking about
this self image and identity thing. It's like the conversation
for me shifted from like, instead of doing gratitude, how
can I become the version of myself that practices gratitude,
and it really is just literally like what do they
say where energy goes or where time goes? Energy flows, right,
and so it's like if your focus or where focus goes,
I should say if your focus, it's literally a shift

(47:47):
in focus. Like you just demonstrated that cascade when you
folk shifted your focus to gratitude. It was a cascade
to cascade to cascade. And that's really how energy works.
Like we get to choose, like what are we focusing on?
You know, so in terms of gratitude in general, focusing
more on what you do have and what you do
want more of and like the solution that you want
to create. And one of the things I do is
I'm almost grateful in advance. That's one of my versions

(48:09):
of faith, like being grateful in advance for what I
can't yet see and just because again, what's the alternative
in the waiting? I can either be an anxiety and
like man disappointment or like fear that it's not going
to happen, or I can just live with this kind
of like almost positive expectation that it is. You know.
So in terms of the three the four things I'm
grateful for, I have to say Nashville, first of all,

(48:29):
because I'm not a born Nashvillian. And it's just it's
transformed everything about my life. Who I am, the courage
that I needed to gather to do some of the
things I'm doing, And I don't believe I would have
found my faith if I hadn't moved to Nashville, And
just the actual city itself is just it bolsters creativity
and self love and it's amazing. And I'm biased because

(48:50):
I love here, but I live here because I love
it and I'm grateful for it. So that's the number
one nice thing. Number two would be warm chocolate chip cookies.
And this too, just kind of explained about this. This
is how I love on people. It started a friend
of mine was having a cancer adversary party. She had cancer,
she survived, and she was having a wig party and
I was like, you know what, I could get her
a bottle of wine or something, but I she loved

(49:11):
chocolate chip cookies. I'm like, I'm going to research and
make the best of the best of chocolate chip cookies.
So I like kind of pulled from a bunch of
different recipes and made a cookie cake, a chocolate chip
cookie cake. And I've been told that it's people's favorite
or the best they've ever had. I personally am biased
and love it, but now it's just this symbol of
love for me, like when I love on somebody, I
for birthdays and stuff I love with a big chocolate

(49:33):
chip cookie cakes, so warm chocolate chip cookies. And it
also just really symbolizes how far I've come with my
own relationship with Yah. I might need to get that
recipe absolutely. The third thing might seem a little bit ironic,
but it's really I'm grateful every day for my past
suffering and shame. You know, we talked about that the
depth of your darkness equals the height of your light.
And it's only because I know who I was when

(49:54):
I was living in my own food and body and
shame prison that I can meet women where they are
and they know they're not being judged and I can
hold that space for them because I've been there, and
and to be honest, I never want to forget it,
like I never want to forget where I came from,
because that allows me to not only connect, but give
women permission to you know, I can speak about my
stuff without any shame anymore. This was, it's just data,

(50:15):
It's just part of my story. And if I can
give women on written permission to just step into their
own story and see that their own pain and shame
and suffering is their gateway out, like it is their
door to freedom. Um, then I'll share it all day,
every day, and I'll be grateful for it every day.
Fourth thing would be having four seasons in the year.
I grew up in Florida, where we had two seasons
hot and hotter, and just being in a place where

(50:36):
there is a summer, a winter, a fall of spring
which is your favorite fall for sure, the burst of colors,
and of course the pumpkin spice everything, and just being
able to see the distinction like we all have our
own metaphorical seasons, but just having actual seasons to kind
of create a clearing when you need it is priceless.
Oh yeah, I think I know that most of my
listeners their favorite time is Fault too, because we do

(50:59):
four things Fault pull Over and people have gone crazy
for them this year, which is awesome because they support
my life Speaks in Haiti right now in the work
that they're doing. But we have a burnt orange one
with different four things and them a run one with
another four things, and they're so people are so excited
to get them. I think that we're just so eager
for fall. And the temperature started to drop here a

(51:21):
little bit, so I am so with you on the fall.
And I think most of my listeners are in with
the fall or my four Things community, or at least
people that shop a squaw because the fall. Bolliver's now,
I'm like ready for next fall. So maybe we can
add another color. Last year we just did the orange,
then we added the roon, and then now I'm like thinking, oh,

(51:41):
Mary and I need to talk about do we need
like a map color one or a maple syrup? Call yeah,
something next year with another four things, because it's just such.
There's something about the good tire, good energy, good well.
I'm glad it's fall. We get to get out and
enjoy that, especially Nashal. We got awesome weather here today.
So I hope wherever you are, you are having a

(52:01):
awesome day, an awesome week and you head into your weekend.
I guess with the podcast, it's weird, you never know
when people are actually listening. But thank you Leanne for
coming by, Thanks for having me. If people will want
to find you, where do they go? Yeah, you can
find me at Leanne Ellington dot com. It's l e
A n n e E L l I n G
t O n dot com. And if you are curious
to hear about my philosophies around you know, the stressless

(52:24):
eating mentality and healing yourself image and relationship with food,
you can just go to stressless eating dot com stress
less eating dot com. Awesome. Well, so nice to meet
you