December 3, 2020 • 29 mins
FIRST THING: Amy is back for all Four Things! In the First Thing, Amy debuts the chorus of a song that Brittney Spencer is writing about Outweigh! And then Amy shares a newsletter that Lisa Hayim sent out. SECOND THING: Staying calm, something that has been pretty hard to do this year. Amy shares some tips that she’s been using that might help you out, especially if this year is a little more than what we all thought it would be. THIRD THING: Amy gives another update about Steven from Home Street Home. Then she talks about some ideas and ways that she, and you to, can help the homeless this year, and maybe brighten someone’s day who might be a little down on their luck. FOURTH THING: Amy shares a quote that has resonated with her lately. She also talks about the meditation app that she uses!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
Okay, little food for you so life. Oh it's pretty bay,
it's pretty beautiful than that. A little moth kicking four
(00:32):
brown Happy Thursday. I want to start today's episode off
with something fun, which would be announcing the winner of
our giveaway from last Thursday's Gift Guide episode. So congrats
to Ashley Babinot. I have sent you a d M
so you likely know that you already won. But a
big thank you to everyone that took a screenshot of
the episode and posted it and their stories saying that
(00:53):
they were grateful for the episode. It was super cool
to see all those in my d M s. Mary
and I saw all the time bags, you know, because
part of the giveaway rules or that you had to
tag at Radio Amy and at the Shop Forward. So
we randomly picked a winner and maybe we'll do another
giveaway soon because it was pretty awesome to see all
the tags out there. I don't really ask y'all to
(01:15):
do that often because it kind of feels a little weird,
but again, it is awesome promotion for the podcast, but
a win win in a way because if we do
it with a giveaway, then you have a chance to
get something for yourself in return. So if you miss
last week's episode and you still have Christmas shopping to do,
I encourage you to go back and listen because this
(01:36):
week Spoash shifted our giving to try to buy a
new sports wheelchair for a little girl named Lily that
was at the same orphanage that my kids were at
in Haiti. So if you shop anything a squad this week,
you'll be helping out with that. And for the month
of December, we've also shifted giving to Project Meta Share.
We have worked with this organization before. They are the
best and they're doing a lot of great work in
(01:57):
the Central Plateau region of hey d for moms, babies, education,
et cetera. And I'm just gonna say this real quick
about the four things to it's the customized ones. We
are about to reach production capacity, So if you want
to customize some as gifts for people, then do it today.
We do have pre made totes, so we've got you
covered for a little bit if you end up having
(02:20):
to shop later. But if you can shop in the
next day or so and you want something customized, I
highly encourage you to do it now. Today's episode is diverse,
for sure, but that's my favorite kind of episode as
a lot of you may know. First thing is the
hook of a song that gives me goose bumps. It's
a song that we're working on if you have food
and body issues, and it will be something that you
(02:41):
can listen to for encouragement and it's so good. I'm
also going to share with you a newsletter my friend
Lisa sent out that is on the same topic of
food and body issues. That's especially important during this holiday
season where you may be indulging or eating foods that
you normally don't eat, and hopefully that will of view
the peace of mind you need to just get through
(03:02):
this holiday season still loving yourself and not freaking out.
And the second thing, I'm gonna share tips for staying calm,
which is also important during the holiday season depending on
your family dynamics. Then in the third thing, I share
about some homeless kits that my family and I will
be making this winter. And in the fourth thing, I
have an awesome quote for you. So that's this week's
(03:24):
episode in a nutshell. I hope you enjoy, and I
guess I should say for four things, totes and all that,
you can go to radio amy dot com and it'll
get you links to anything that I have going on,
from the Bobby Bone Show to shop a Splat to
Christmas pimp and joy items to my Amazon page in
case you want to pull gift ideas from there as well.
(03:45):
So Radio Amy dot com. Al Right, here's today's episode.
Enjoy First, Okay, I've been dying to share this with y'all.
My friend Britney Spencer, who has come on the podcast
in multiple times. She did the Gift Guide episode with
us and help me write that jingle. She has come
on to talk to me about Black Lives Matter. She
(04:07):
has come on. Actually she's gonna be doing a podcast
takeover for me maybe next Thursday, not quite sure, but anyway,
she should be a familiar face if you are familiar voice,
if you have been a regular podcast listener. And when
I say face, I highly recommend if you have Instagram
you go follow her v R I T t any
Y Spencer. Brittany can be spelled so many different ways,
(04:29):
but that's how she spells hers. And she wrote a song,
well this is just the chorus part. We're gonna work
on versus to it. But she started a song for
Outweigh about Outweigh, which is the podcast that I do
with Lisa Hame on disordered eating and eating Disorders, and
the song is so good, well, the chorus of this
(04:51):
soon to be song, and I don't think it's anything
that's going to be released anywhere other than well here
on this podcast, in the Outweigh podcast, but just about
loving your body, a life without disordered eating, outweighs everything,
and I feel like this song is going to speak that,
and I feel like it can be something that you
could listen to if you're having a day where you're
(05:13):
really struggling. Because even though I'm in recovery, there's still
days where I have to reset and make sure that
my brain doesn't take me to a place that can
be quite dangerous and destructive. So this song, I think
we'll do that for us again. The whole song isn't
done yet, but here is the chorus, and I cannot
(05:34):
wait for you all to hear the whole thing one day,
but you can let me know what you think. So
far of the chorus, here you go. I won't let
my body up outwait everything that I'm made, won't spend
my life trying to change. I'm learning to love who
I am. I get I'm strong, I feel free, I
know who. Every part of it is beautiful and hello
(06:02):
out with if you feel a little She'll love to
the let's say good day and did June and die out?
Isn't that so good? And that's just Brittany playing at
home on her guitar. There's nothing official about what I
just played for you, but as we add more, we
(06:23):
will share more of the song. But I hope that
it is a gift to you and our Outweigh listeners,
that a life without disordered eating outweighs everything. So another
thing that I want to get into here in the
first thing is a newsletter that my girl Lisa sent out.
I'm just gonna read to you word for word what
she sent And when I opened up this email, I thought,
this is so perfect, Lisa, you are so good with
(06:46):
the words. And while she's writing about Thanksgiving, and here
we are a week after Thanksgiving, but we still have
Christmas dinners, other holiday parties, New Year's Eve. This is
just that time of year where you have all the
things and you feel like you've gained five pounds every
single day, and that is just not the case. So
while Lisa's writing about Thanksgiving, just no. This can apply
(07:09):
to really any day where you might be having some
of these thoughts. So here's what Lisa wrote. Let me
guess you overrate on Thanksgiving and now you're quote paying
for it. And this time it's not just in your head.
Your scale says. So you wait in in the morning,
and a mere few hours later, boom, the scale reflected
a five more pounds, maybe even eight. It's just a fact.
(07:32):
Numbers don't lie. I know many people are jumping on
the cleanses and the diets these last few days simply
because they need to fix the damage. I want to
take this moment to just state some facts that you
may not know about your body and how it all works. First,
I'm gonna calm you down, so breathe seriously. Join me
for a big inhale through the nose and an even
(07:54):
bigger and longer exhale through the mouth. Do it again,
this time even bigger, letting your belly expand on the
inhale and exhale through the mouth like you're fogging a glass.
The panic is helping no one return to this breath.
To remember that healthy habits are opposite to weight loss
related behaviors also have some water. I'd say this even
(08:18):
if you didn't go up five pounds. Water is key
to feeling good and moving things along. Also, throw on
some comfy clothes. Chances are you didn't even notice the way,
if not for the scale. But clothing can make us
focus and harp rather than forcing yourself into clothing that
probably didn't feel comfy even before said weight gain, Now
is the time to wear comfy clothes so you can
(08:39):
take the focus off your physical appearance and make decisions
that come from a good place. Also, it's no one
is wearing real pants right now. Anyway, better luck in
next I'm gonna share with you the facts. Number One,
all foods have weight, even zero calorie foods. Think about water.
You can drink a gallon of water and it won't
(08:59):
provide knee energy. The scale may go up from the
water in your body, but your body isn't doing anything. Secondly,
water enters the body many ways. I we take in
water in other ways besides drinking it. Many foods have
water weight. This is a good thing. We may hold
onto extra if there's been excess sodium, but remember it
all needs to come into the body, most of it temporary. Third,
(09:23):
carbs sometimes hold onto water. This doesn't mean you did
anything wrong or that you should stop eating carbs, Oh,
dear Lord, No. But from a science perspective, when we
convert carbs stored as glycogen, which is our carb sources
that live in our muscles and get used as energy,
it takes about three grams of water with it. Fourth
thing here there could be light food sensitivities you may
(09:46):
not even know about. Sometimes our bodies have anti inflammatory
reactions to foods. It may not present as a rash
or an obvious allergy as you know it. But during
the holidays, you may eat foods that you don't normally
eat in your immune system is plun strong enough to
handle the perceived invader. To do so, it may cause
some inflammation. This is your body's natural way of protecting
(10:08):
you allow for it. Fifth point, Muscle recovery causes inflammation.
Did you exercise in the last few days? When we
work out strength train specifically, we cause little micro tears
in our muscle. The process of healing and growing involves
some natural inflammation that involves pulling a fluid let. Your
muscles recover by continuing to give them food and energy.
(10:29):
Of all types. Sixth point. If you only eate protein
to quote eat clean, can we get some fiber up
in here? Don't forget some of the best carbs are
veggies that have fiber. It's not just good for the heart,
it also moves things along. You might be a bit
backed up. The best thing you can do during holidays
and times of stress, when you feel focused on numbers
(10:49):
is instead focus on the healthy behaviors like a movement,
enjoying food, getting outside. Say this to yourself, I can
move my body joyfully today. I can eat all foods today.
Remember that without the scale or focusing on weight, you
will for sure find that healthy behaviors are not just
good for you, they're enjoyable. Veggies and fruit and whole
(11:12):
grains are delicious and you'll feel great eating them. Drinking less,
being mindful with your alcohol consumption will make your body
feel better too. Rarely does someone say I wish I
had drink more. Lastly, moving your body in a way
that feels good for you, be that walking or running
or spinning or yoga or rollerblading. Movement and exercise gives
you endorphins. And then I love Lisa's newsletters because she
(11:35):
puts great little memes in there, and she included the
l Woods one from Legally Blonde, where she talks about
how she exercises and exercise releases endorphins and endorphins make
you happy, and happy people don't kill people, or something
like that. So it was a super cute way to
wrap this up. Lisa and I just loved, loved, love
this newsletter. It was such a good reminder. I used
(11:55):
to spend my holidays restricting right up until big meal,
and then I would eat the big meal and then
I would get so full, and then I would spend
the next three days cleansing and restricting. And I got
to say, this year was amazing. I got to experience
a healthy Thanksgiving last year, but I think I was
still wrapped up in counting macros at that point, which
(12:18):
if you listen to Outweigh you might know a little
bit more about my story. With that, I encourage you
if you feel like you are trapped in a vicious
cycle with food and body image stuff and you don't
know how to get out that you do check out
our Outweigh podcast. It is a series that we did here.
It lived within four things. But now, in case you
missed the memo. It is its own podcast, and we
(12:40):
have episodes that go up every Saturday. There are quick
episodes about thirty minutes. We've got our stories, other people's
real stories. We have experts coming on. We hope that
it will give you a lot of different tools to
keep in your toolbox to help dig you out of
diet culture. I was wrapped up in it for a
too long and I feel so much better now that
(13:02):
I'm out of it. And it was pretty amazing to
just relax this last week with Thanksgiving. Even post Thanksgiving,
I woke up the next day. I ate as normal.
I ate breakfast, I lunch, I ate carbs, I fat,
I ate dairy. I ate things that I used to
never allow myself because I would have indulged in tons
of quote unquote bad stuff on Thanksgiving Day. So if
(13:25):
that is how you have felt this last week, I
just want to send you some encouragement. You're not alone.
You're feeling that way because society has told us that
that is how we should behave It's very acceptable to
be wrapped up in that mentality. So sending you a
virtual hug right now. Don't freak out. There is opportunity
(13:45):
for things to look very very different for you when
it comes to food in your body, and my hope
is that you will get there one day. But it
really isn't an overnight thing. I've been working on this
for a while now and I'm not saying that it's easy,
and there might be setbacks, but Lisa has been a
huge help for me, and and so have some other
people and resources, which again you can probably figure out
(14:08):
who all those people are if you check out the
Outweigh podcast. So let's talk staying calm here for the
second thing, which is hard to do if you are
frustrated or angry or just having a hard time, which
this is a year where yes, we have all been
having a difficult time, but we also have our other
(14:29):
life things that would be happening whether or not there's
a pandemic. I mean, this stuff could come up, you know,
into what back in twenty nineteen whenever we weren't dealing
with coronavirus, or it may come up in two which
hopefully will be free of this come then. But we
still have circumstances that come up in our life that
make us angry or frustrated or put us into some
sort of fight or flight mode where we feel threatened.
(14:52):
So I want to read with you a little section
from a book that I have been reading by Dr
Terry Levy about staying calm. And he starts this section
of his book off with a quote from Abraham Lincoln
that says, there is nothing stronger than gentleness. And I
love that. I feel like maybe sometimes being gentle might
be perceived as weakness, but if Abraham Lincoln, pretty solid dude,
(15:15):
says there is nothing stronger than gentleness. And now I'm
just going to read word for word what is printed
here under this section about staying calm to give you
some tools to use. Now, what you're going to be
hearing is about a child and a parent, but this
can apply to any relationship. My husband and I have
been using this in how we navigate difficult conversations or
(15:38):
hard times, or when we're really frustrated or angry. So
it could work with your significant other, it could work
with your roommate, your coworker, whoever you might have some
tension with. And I mean, we're in the holiday season,
which is supposed to be the most wonderful time of
the year, and I truly think that it is. And
things are merry and bright, but for some people when
(15:58):
you're home for the holidays, that can be extremely stressful,
depending on your family dynamic. So I'm going to give
you these tips through written right here in the book.
Very simple but just stuff you can walk yourself through.
If you start to feel as though you're not going
to be able to stay calm, you need to do
these things all right. Here's what Doctor leave You wrote.
(16:20):
It is difficult to stay calm when you are threatened, angry,
or frustrated. However, this is the most important time to
do so, especially when dealing with your wounded children. Losing
your temper and overreacting only leads to saying or doing
something you regret later. Staying calm allows you to think
before you act. Your child will respect you and see
(16:41):
you as a positive role model, and you will feel
better about yourself. The three steps to staying calm include stop,
tune in, and act. Okay, this is me talking again,
not the book, but see how this could apply to
to any relationship. Right now, it's saying that this is
between a parent and a wounded child, but really, my
husband and I have been using stop, tune in and act,
(17:03):
so I know that you can use this in other
areas of your life. Okay, back to the book Stop understop,
he wrote, don't act impulsively. Take a deep breath, relax
your body, calm your mind. Under tune in, he wrote,
be aware of yourself talk and your body signals. Yourself
talk will either agitate you or calm you down. No
(17:26):
one makes us angry. Anger is always a choice. You
can choose to be angry or choose not to be angry.
Whenever your anger escalates, you're saying something to yourself that
is making you angrier. For example, if you say to yourself,
my child will never learn to listen and respect me,
you will feel hopeless and give up. Be aware of
your body signals such as shallow breathing, elevated heartbeat, clenched jaws,
(17:50):
and flushed cheeks. Your body is telling you that you
are physically and emotionally escalating. And the next one under act,
he wrote, Once you are calmed down and control, you're
much more likely to think logically, resulting in constructive problem solving.
You can now share your thoughts and feelings in a clear, honest,
and appropriate way, or decide on another course of action
(18:12):
that will be helpful. To your child or spous or whatever.
That was me adding that in here back to the book.
When in doubts, say nothing. If you are not sure
how to respond, differ until later you can say, I'll
get back to you later, dad, and I will discuss
this and let you know. Okay, So there you go,
staying calm. You need to do these three things. Stop,
(18:33):
don't act impulsively, tune in, be aware of how you're
talking to yourself inside your body signals self talk, and
then lastly act because then you can make a more proactive, controlled,
constructive decision and move forward. So I have no idea
if this might be helpful for y'all, but this has
(18:53):
been a great tool for me. It seems so simple,
and some of you might be like, oh, yeah, I
already do that, But some of us, I don't think.
When you're in a mode and you're so frustrated and angry,
and we all have different life scripts, I guess like
we have different things in our past that cause us
to react in a way that sometimes might be more impulsive,
and it's not very proactive. It's very reactive, and it's
(19:17):
not your fault. I don't know. It really just depends
on how you were raised, different things you've experienced in
your life, but we all have different things that trigger
us and maybe send us to a state of not calm.
And yeah, our heart rate goes up, or we get
flush cheeks, or we are jaw gets clenched, and we
don't know what to do. But I can tell you
these three things have been a huge blessing for me lately,
(19:40):
and that is to stop tune in and then act
and give yourself grace. I'm throwing that in there because
you're not going to execute this perfectly in every situation
that you feel frustrated. But I promised you the more
you practice it, the easier it will get. And I
love that when it comes time to act, you actually
have permission to say I'll give back to you later
(20:01):
on this, because that's you recognizing you're not in a
space to have a constructive conversation about it yet. Do
you still need to do some more tuning in? But
you were able to stop tune in and realize I
don't really know that I have the solution right now,
So let's talk about this later in whether it's with
your child, your husband, your wife, a family member, whatever
(20:21):
it is, it's going on. Stuff that's said in the
heat of the moment is not going to get you
anywhere in a constructive manner. So there you have it.
Some tips to help you stay calm in case you
might need that literally later today, or who knows, you
might need them in a couple of weeks or next year,
but at least you've got them. Stop, tune in and
act if you listen to Tuesday's episode. This week, the
(20:54):
fifth thing I mentioned that Steven had to go to
the hospital. He is the founder of Homes Street Home,
the homeless ministry here in Nashville. He was on the
Gift Guide episode which aired last Thursday, and on Thursday night,
Thanksgiving night, he had a stroke. I can't believe it,
but he is doing okay. I said that I would
give y'all an update because I knew that he had
(21:16):
gone through something. I just didn't know the details. And
here's a text that I got back from him after
I was checking in. He said, I'm doing okay. I
had a stroke Thursday night, no permanent damage just week.
I went back to the doctor yesterday and everything is stable.
It's just going to take a while to get back
to full strength. They've got me on a medication routine
that should keep the possibility of another one at bay.
(21:36):
Thanks for checking in on me. So I just wanted
to update you on that because he is a huge
part of the homeless community here in Nashville. He was
homeless here for five years. Now he is not, and
now he has committed his life to serving the homeless
here and I just adore him and think he's an
amazing person. He has a lot on his plate and
(21:57):
now he is dealing with this. So if you all
could just keep Stephen in your prayers, that would be awesome.
And I bring him up in this thing as well,
because I want to go over simple idea of some
winter homeless kits that you could keep in your car
as it starts to get cold outside and when you're
driving around. If you're single, this could be a great
(22:18):
thing for you to do. If you've got a boyfriend
or husband, maybe you all could get together to do it,
but especially if you have kids, this is an awesome
thing to do as a family. So here's what we're
going to be doing in our family. I'm going to
get some big ziploc bags, the big plastic kind, and
I'm gonna have a beanie on hand for each bag.
(22:40):
I'm gonna do a pair of gloves. I'm gonna do
a pair of socks. And here's something I learned from
my friend Steven. Giving a homeless person a big bag
of cheap socks that has twelve pair in it that
you got at Walmart or Target on sale or whatever,
don't do that. I'd rather you take the money that
you spent on twelve socks and by one really good
(23:02):
pair of socks that is going to go much further
with someone that is cold and sleeping outside. That is
a better gift to them than getting ten socks. They
don't need to be rotating out their socks. They're not
worried about that. They're worried about staying warm, and those
cheap ones they don't do it. So that is one
thing that Stephen taught us last year when he came
(23:23):
on the podcast. I'm going to throw in a scarf.
Some body wipes, even baby wipes work just as well,
depending on what you're able to find. A travel toothbrush,
travel toothpaste, chapstick definitely a big thing during the winter.
Some granola bars and other snacks. I'm gonna do some nuts.
But the kids also wanted to throw in some of
(23:45):
their Halloween candy because they thought that would be a
nice treat, which I totally agree. Some people might be like, no,
you don't need to give them candy, but they should
enjoy the things in life like we get to enjoy.
And in fact, like in a Snicker's or a Reese's cup,
there's some peanut butter in there, which is more satisfying
and has something to it. Then maybe I don't know,
(24:05):
like a bag of Skittles, Like we're gonna give them
some good, hardy type candy. You could also add deodorant
if you wanted to, some hand lotion small first aid
kits cough drops is another good one. And then if
the weather is really cold, depending on where you live
in the country, you maybe could throw in some of
those hot hand warming packs. I think that's a great idea.
And then everything can go inside that big old zip
(24:28):
block bag and then when you hand it to them,
maybe if you have some bottles of water also in
your car, if that'll fit in the bag, great, but
if not, you could just give them the water and
the bag. Oh and then another thing I didn't mention here,
but just popped in my head that I think we're
gonna do is like a gift card to a McDonald's
or maybe even some cash. When I'm on my way
to work, I pass a couple of the same homeless
(24:50):
people every day, and I know that two blocks from
there there's a McDonald's, So I think I'm gonna do
McDonald's because I know that's close by and they can
go get a warm coffee or a hamburger or hot
biscuit or whatever they choose to get. But you know,
just think of where you see certain people and if
you have the opportunity to bless them in this way,
that would be awesome. Because the weather is getting really
(25:11):
cold out and it was snowing here the other day
in Nashville, and I just feel as though we went
from warmish fall weather to boom, super cold, and that's
a big adjustment for people, especially if you're you're living outside.
So I mean, just think about it, and then this
is another time where you can really practice gratitude and
be thankful for the things that you have in your
(25:33):
life that keep you warm, whether it's a jacket, nice boots,
a car, a house, hot food, gloves stuff like that. Okay,
well that is it on this thing. I just wanted
to share with you all what we're going to be
doing in our house now that it's getting cold out
and quickly, I'll just say Steven's website again in case
you all want to make a donation to his organization.
(25:55):
It's home Street Home t in dot org and the
tienas for tennis. See again, I can vouch that he
is doing wonderful things here. So if you're looking for
a place to give this holiday season, that might be
an awesome place for you to donate. So for the
(26:18):
last thing today, I'm gonna leave you with a quote
that I thought was pretty awesome. You've probably heard it before,
but it's something that just really has resonated with me
lately because I spend a lot of times worrying about
other things, or maybe other people and what they might
be thinking or what they're doing, and really I need
(26:39):
to oftentimes just look in the mirror. So this quote
comes from Aldus Huxley. Pretty sure that's how you say
his name. Sorry if I got that wrong, but here's
the quote. There's only one corner of the universe you
can be certain of improving, and that's yourself boom, your corner.
That is what you can focus on. Because unless you're
(27:02):
willing to put in the work and work on yourself
and look in the mirror and really face some things,
then I think you're just going to be extremely disappointed
in trying to look at everything else for improvement. You
can be in control of improving yourself. I say this
quote right now to remind me and to encourage you,
(27:23):
and I'm also going to share with you right now
the Headspace app. I maybe have talked about it before,
but I thought it falls in line with this quote,
so I'm gonna bring it up now anyways. But it
is a meditation app, and that is one way where
you can be more mindful and center yourself and deal
with stress and anxiety, sleep problems, if you're having trouble focusing.
(27:46):
It kind of can help you out with a lot
of different things. But you can start out with just
three minutes a day. They do have a basic pack
which is free. This isn't a commercial, by the way.
This I'm just letting you know the details, but you
can get like an upgraded package, which is a subscription
which can cost you a monthly fee. But if you're
looking to build some healthy habits, and maybe you're looking
(28:06):
to be more mindful and meditate than I encourage you
to check out the Headspace app and y'all can join
me in doing that. I've done a few different meditation apps.
This is just currently the one that that I'm on.
I don't know, I may have another one to recommend
for y'all. I would love it. If you have any
that you want to recommend to me, please send them
to me. Or if there's any YouTube videos or anything
(28:28):
that's kind of worked for you to help with mindfulness
and meditation. I am not an expert when it comes
to this, but it's something that I am trying to
do more of, so I thought I would share that
with y'all. I'll say the quote one more time before
we totally wrap. There's only one corner of the universe
you can be certain of improving, and that is yourself.
(28:48):
I'll just Huxley all right, hope you'll have a great
rest of your week, and I'll see you next Tuesday
for the fifth thing.
Okay, little food for you so life. Oh it's pretty bay,
it's pretty beautiful than that. A little moth kicking four
(00:32):
brown Happy Thursday. I want to start today's episode off
with something fun, which would be announcing the winner of
our giveaway from last Thursday's Gift Guide episode. So congrats
to Ashley Babinot. I have sent you a d M
so you likely know that you already won. But a
big thank you to everyone that took a screenshot of
the episode and posted it and their stories saying that
(00:53):
they were grateful for the episode. It was super cool
to see all those in my d M s. Mary
and I saw all the time bags, you know, because
part of the giveaway rules or that you had to
tag at Radio Amy and at the Shop Forward. So
we randomly picked a winner and maybe we'll do another
giveaway soon because it was pretty awesome to see all
the tags out there. I don't really ask y'all to
(01:15):
do that often because it kind of feels a little weird,
but again, it is awesome promotion for the podcast, but
a win win in a way because if we do
it with a giveaway, then you have a chance to
get something for yourself in return. So if you miss
last week's episode and you still have Christmas shopping to do,
I encourage you to go back and listen because this
(01:36):
week Spoash shifted our giving to try to buy a
new sports wheelchair for a little girl named Lily that
was at the same orphanage that my kids were at
in Haiti. So if you shop anything a squad this week,
you'll be helping out with that. And for the month
of December, we've also shifted giving to Project Meta Share.
We have worked with this organization before. They are the
best and they're doing a lot of great work in
(01:57):
the Central Plateau region of hey d for moms, babies, education,
et cetera. And I'm just gonna say this real quick
about the four things to it's the customized ones. We
are about to reach production capacity, So if you want
to customize some as gifts for people, then do it today.
We do have pre made totes, so we've got you
covered for a little bit if you end up having
(02:20):
to shop later. But if you can shop in the
next day or so and you want something customized, I
highly encourage you to do it now. Today's episode is diverse,
for sure, but that's my favorite kind of episode as
a lot of you may know. First thing is the
hook of a song that gives me goose bumps. It's
a song that we're working on if you have food
and body issues, and it will be something that you
(02:41):
can listen to for encouragement and it's so good. I'm
also going to share with you a newsletter my friend
Lisa sent out that is on the same topic of
food and body issues. That's especially important during this holiday
season where you may be indulging or eating foods that
you normally don't eat, and hopefully that will of view
the peace of mind you need to just get through
(03:02):
this holiday season still loving yourself and not freaking out.
And the second thing, I'm gonna share tips for staying calm,
which is also important during the holiday season depending on
your family dynamics. Then in the third thing, I share
about some homeless kits that my family and I will
be making this winter. And in the fourth thing, I
have an awesome quote for you. So that's this week's
(03:24):
episode in a nutshell. I hope you enjoy, and I
guess I should say for four things, totes and all that,
you can go to radio amy dot com and it'll
get you links to anything that I have going on,
from the Bobby Bone Show to shop a Splat to
Christmas pimp and joy items to my Amazon page in
case you want to pull gift ideas from there as well.
(03:45):
So Radio Amy dot com. Al Right, here's today's episode.
Enjoy First, Okay, I've been dying to share this with y'all.
My friend Britney Spencer, who has come on the podcast
in multiple times. She did the Gift Guide episode with
us and help me write that jingle. She has come
on to talk to me about Black Lives Matter. She
(04:07):
has come on. Actually she's gonna be doing a podcast
takeover for me maybe next Thursday, not quite sure, but anyway,
she should be a familiar face if you are familiar voice,
if you have been a regular podcast listener. And when
I say face, I highly recommend if you have Instagram
you go follow her v R I T t any
Y Spencer. Brittany can be spelled so many different ways,
(04:29):
but that's how she spells hers. And she wrote a song,
well this is just the chorus part. We're gonna work
on versus to it. But she started a song for
Outweigh about Outweigh, which is the podcast that I do
with Lisa Hame on disordered eating and eating Disorders, and
the song is so good, well, the chorus of this
(04:51):
soon to be song, and I don't think it's anything
that's going to be released anywhere other than well here
on this podcast, in the Outweigh podcast, but just about
loving your body, a life without disordered eating, outweighs everything,
and I feel like this song is going to speak that,
and I feel like it can be something that you
could listen to if you're having a day where you're
(05:13):
really struggling. Because even though I'm in recovery, there's still
days where I have to reset and make sure that
my brain doesn't take me to a place that can
be quite dangerous and destructive. So this song, I think
we'll do that for us again. The whole song isn't
done yet, but here is the chorus, and I cannot
(05:34):
wait for you all to hear the whole thing one day,
but you can let me know what you think. So
far of the chorus, here you go. I won't let
my body up outwait everything that I'm made, won't spend
my life trying to change. I'm learning to love who
I am. I get I'm strong, I feel free, I
know who. Every part of it is beautiful and hello
(06:02):
out with if you feel a little She'll love to
the let's say good day and did June and die out?
Isn't that so good? And that's just Brittany playing at
home on her guitar. There's nothing official about what I
just played for you, but as we add more, we
(06:23):
will share more of the song. But I hope that
it is a gift to you and our Outweigh listeners,
that a life without disordered eating outweighs everything. So another
thing that I want to get into here in the
first thing is a newsletter that my girl Lisa sent out.
I'm just gonna read to you word for word what
she sent And when I opened up this email, I thought,
this is so perfect, Lisa, you are so good with
(06:46):
the words. And while she's writing about Thanksgiving, and here
we are a week after Thanksgiving, but we still have
Christmas dinners, other holiday parties, New Year's Eve. This is
just that time of year where you have all the
things and you feel like you've gained five pounds every
single day, and that is just not the case. So
while Lisa's writing about Thanksgiving, just no. This can apply
(07:09):
to really any day where you might be having some
of these thoughts. So here's what Lisa wrote. Let me
guess you overrate on Thanksgiving and now you're quote paying
for it. And this time it's not just in your head.
Your scale says. So you wait in in the morning,
and a mere few hours later, boom, the scale reflected
a five more pounds, maybe even eight. It's just a fact.
(07:32):
Numbers don't lie. I know many people are jumping on
the cleanses and the diets these last few days simply
because they need to fix the damage. I want to
take this moment to just state some facts that you
may not know about your body and how it all works. First,
I'm gonna calm you down, so breathe seriously. Join me
for a big inhale through the nose and an even
(07:54):
bigger and longer exhale through the mouth. Do it again,
this time even bigger, letting your belly expand on the
inhale and exhale through the mouth like you're fogging a glass.
The panic is helping no one return to this breath.
To remember that healthy habits are opposite to weight loss
related behaviors also have some water. I'd say this even
(08:18):
if you didn't go up five pounds. Water is key
to feeling good and moving things along. Also, throw on
some comfy clothes. Chances are you didn't even notice the way,
if not for the scale. But clothing can make us
focus and harp rather than forcing yourself into clothing that
probably didn't feel comfy even before said weight gain, Now
is the time to wear comfy clothes so you can
(08:39):
take the focus off your physical appearance and make decisions
that come from a good place. Also, it's no one
is wearing real pants right now. Anyway, better luck in
next I'm gonna share with you the facts. Number One,
all foods have weight, even zero calorie foods. Think about water.
You can drink a gallon of water and it won't
(08:59):
provide knee energy. The scale may go up from the
water in your body, but your body isn't doing anything. Secondly,
water enters the body many ways. I we take in
water in other ways besides drinking it. Many foods have
water weight. This is a good thing. We may hold
onto extra if there's been excess sodium, but remember it
all needs to come into the body, most of it temporary. Third,
(09:23):
carbs sometimes hold onto water. This doesn't mean you did
anything wrong or that you should stop eating carbs, Oh,
dear Lord, No. But from a science perspective, when we
convert carbs stored as glycogen, which is our carb sources
that live in our muscles and get used as energy,
it takes about three grams of water with it. Fourth
thing here there could be light food sensitivities you may
(09:46):
not even know about. Sometimes our bodies have anti inflammatory
reactions to foods. It may not present as a rash
or an obvious allergy as you know it. But during
the holidays, you may eat foods that you don't normally
eat in your immune system is plun strong enough to
handle the perceived invader. To do so, it may cause
some inflammation. This is your body's natural way of protecting
(10:08):
you allow for it. Fifth point, Muscle recovery causes inflammation.
Did you exercise in the last few days? When we
work out strength train specifically, we cause little micro tears
in our muscle. The process of healing and growing involves
some natural inflammation that involves pulling a fluid let. Your
muscles recover by continuing to give them food and energy.
(10:29):
Of all types. Sixth point. If you only eate protein
to quote eat clean, can we get some fiber up
in here? Don't forget some of the best carbs are
veggies that have fiber. It's not just good for the heart,
it also moves things along. You might be a bit
backed up. The best thing you can do during holidays
and times of stress, when you feel focused on numbers
(10:49):
is instead focus on the healthy behaviors like a movement,
enjoying food, getting outside. Say this to yourself, I can
move my body joyfully today. I can eat all foods today.
Remember that without the scale or focusing on weight, you
will for sure find that healthy behaviors are not just
good for you, they're enjoyable. Veggies and fruit and whole
(11:12):
grains are delicious and you'll feel great eating them. Drinking less,
being mindful with your alcohol consumption will make your body
feel better too. Rarely does someone say I wish I
had drink more. Lastly, moving your body in a way
that feels good for you, be that walking or running
or spinning or yoga or rollerblading. Movement and exercise gives
you endorphins. And then I love Lisa's newsletters because she
(11:35):
puts great little memes in there, and she included the
l Woods one from Legally Blonde, where she talks about
how she exercises and exercise releases endorphins and endorphins make
you happy, and happy people don't kill people, or something
like that. So it was a super cute way to
wrap this up. Lisa and I just loved, loved, love
this newsletter. It was such a good reminder. I used
(11:55):
to spend my holidays restricting right up until big meal,
and then I would eat the big meal and then
I would get so full, and then I would spend
the next three days cleansing and restricting. And I got
to say, this year was amazing. I got to experience
a healthy Thanksgiving last year, but I think I was
still wrapped up in counting macros at that point, which
(12:18):
if you listen to Outweigh you might know a little
bit more about my story. With that, I encourage you
if you feel like you are trapped in a vicious
cycle with food and body image stuff and you don't
know how to get out that you do check out
our Outweigh podcast. It is a series that we did here.
It lived within four things. But now, in case you
missed the memo. It is its own podcast, and we
(12:40):
have episodes that go up every Saturday. There are quick
episodes about thirty minutes. We've got our stories, other people's
real stories. We have experts coming on. We hope that
it will give you a lot of different tools to
keep in your toolbox to help dig you out of
diet culture. I was wrapped up in it for a
too long and I feel so much better now that
(13:02):
I'm out of it. And it was pretty amazing to
just relax this last week with Thanksgiving. Even post Thanksgiving,
I woke up the next day. I ate as normal.
I ate breakfast, I lunch, I ate carbs, I fat,
I ate dairy. I ate things that I used to
never allow myself because I would have indulged in tons
of quote unquote bad stuff on Thanksgiving Day. So if
(13:25):
that is how you have felt this last week, I
just want to send you some encouragement. You're not alone.
You're feeling that way because society has told us that
that is how we should behave It's very acceptable to
be wrapped up in that mentality. So sending you a
virtual hug right now. Don't freak out. There is opportunity
(13:45):
for things to look very very different for you when
it comes to food in your body, and my hope
is that you will get there one day. But it
really isn't an overnight thing. I've been working on this
for a while now and I'm not saying that it's easy,
and there might be setbacks, but Lisa has been a
huge help for me, and and so have some other
people and resources, which again you can probably figure out
(14:08):
who all those people are if you check out the
Outweigh podcast. So let's talk staying calm here for the
second thing, which is hard to do if you are
frustrated or angry or just having a hard time, which
this is a year where yes, we have all been
having a difficult time, but we also have our other
(14:29):
life things that would be happening whether or not there's
a pandemic. I mean, this stuff could come up, you know,
into what back in twenty nineteen whenever we weren't dealing
with coronavirus, or it may come up in two which
hopefully will be free of this come then. But we
still have circumstances that come up in our life that
make us angry or frustrated or put us into some
sort of fight or flight mode where we feel threatened.
(14:52):
So I want to read with you a little section
from a book that I have been reading by Dr
Terry Levy about staying calm. And he starts this section
of his book off with a quote from Abraham Lincoln
that says, there is nothing stronger than gentleness. And I
love that. I feel like maybe sometimes being gentle might
be perceived as weakness, but if Abraham Lincoln, pretty solid dude,
(15:15):
says there is nothing stronger than gentleness. And now I'm
just going to read word for word what is printed
here under this section about staying calm to give you
some tools to use. Now, what you're going to be
hearing is about a child and a parent, but this
can apply to any relationship. My husband and I have
been using this in how we navigate difficult conversations or
(15:38):
hard times, or when we're really frustrated or angry. So
it could work with your significant other, it could work
with your roommate, your coworker, whoever you might have some
tension with. And I mean, we're in the holiday season,
which is supposed to be the most wonderful time of
the year, and I truly think that it is. And
things are merry and bright, but for some people when
(15:58):
you're home for the holidays, that can be extremely stressful,
depending on your family dynamic. So I'm going to give
you these tips through written right here in the book.
Very simple but just stuff you can walk yourself through.
If you start to feel as though you're not going
to be able to stay calm, you need to do
these things all right. Here's what Doctor leave You wrote.
(16:20):
It is difficult to stay calm when you are threatened, angry,
or frustrated. However, this is the most important time to
do so, especially when dealing with your wounded children. Losing
your temper and overreacting only leads to saying or doing
something you regret later. Staying calm allows you to think
before you act. Your child will respect you and see
(16:41):
you as a positive role model, and you will feel
better about yourself. The three steps to staying calm include stop,
tune in, and act. Okay, this is me talking again,
not the book, but see how this could apply to
to any relationship. Right now, it's saying that this is
between a parent and a wounded child, but really, my
husband and I have been using stop, tune in and act,
(17:03):
so I know that you can use this in other
areas of your life. Okay, back to the book Stop understop,
he wrote, don't act impulsively. Take a deep breath, relax
your body, calm your mind. Under tune in, he wrote,
be aware of yourself talk and your body signals. Yourself
talk will either agitate you or calm you down. No
(17:26):
one makes us angry. Anger is always a choice. You
can choose to be angry or choose not to be angry.
Whenever your anger escalates, you're saying something to yourself that
is making you angrier. For example, if you say to yourself,
my child will never learn to listen and respect me,
you will feel hopeless and give up. Be aware of
your body signals such as shallow breathing, elevated heartbeat, clenched jaws,
(17:50):
and flushed cheeks. Your body is telling you that you
are physically and emotionally escalating. And the next one under act,
he wrote, Once you are calmed down and control, you're
much more likely to think logically, resulting in constructive problem solving.
You can now share your thoughts and feelings in a clear, honest,
and appropriate way, or decide on another course of action
(18:12):
that will be helpful. To your child or spous or whatever.
That was me adding that in here back to the book.
When in doubts, say nothing. If you are not sure
how to respond, differ until later you can say, I'll
get back to you later, dad, and I will discuss
this and let you know. Okay, So there you go,
staying calm. You need to do these three things. Stop,
(18:33):
don't act impulsively, tune in, be aware of how you're
talking to yourself inside your body signals self talk, and
then lastly act because then you can make a more proactive, controlled,
constructive decision and move forward. So I have no idea
if this might be helpful for y'all, but this has
(18:53):
been a great tool for me. It seems so simple,
and some of you might be like, oh, yeah, I
already do that, But some of us, I don't think.
When you're in a mode and you're so frustrated and angry,
and we all have different life scripts, I guess like
we have different things in our past that cause us
to react in a way that sometimes might be more impulsive,
and it's not very proactive. It's very reactive, and it's
(19:17):
not your fault. I don't know. It really just depends
on how you were raised, different things you've experienced in
your life, but we all have different things that trigger
us and maybe send us to a state of not calm.
And yeah, our heart rate goes up, or we get
flush cheeks, or we are jaw gets clenched, and we
don't know what to do. But I can tell you
these three things have been a huge blessing for me lately,
(19:40):
and that is to stop tune in and then act
and give yourself grace. I'm throwing that in there because
you're not going to execute this perfectly in every situation
that you feel frustrated. But I promised you the more
you practice it, the easier it will get. And I
love that when it comes time to act, you actually
have permission to say I'll give back to you later
(20:01):
on this, because that's you recognizing you're not in a
space to have a constructive conversation about it yet. Do
you still need to do some more tuning in? But
you were able to stop tune in and realize I
don't really know that I have the solution right now,
So let's talk about this later in whether it's with
your child, your husband, your wife, a family member, whatever
(20:21):
it is, it's going on. Stuff that's said in the
heat of the moment is not going to get you
anywhere in a constructive manner. So there you have it.
Some tips to help you stay calm in case you
might need that literally later today, or who knows, you
might need them in a couple of weeks or next year,
but at least you've got them. Stop, tune in and
act if you listen to Tuesday's episode. This week, the
(20:54):
fifth thing I mentioned that Steven had to go to
the hospital. He is the founder of Homes Street Home,
the homeless ministry here in Nashville. He was on the
Gift Guide episode which aired last Thursday, and on Thursday night,
Thanksgiving night, he had a stroke. I can't believe it,
but he is doing okay. I said that I would
give y'all an update because I knew that he had
(21:16):
gone through something. I just didn't know the details. And
here's a text that I got back from him after
I was checking in. He said, I'm doing okay. I
had a stroke Thursday night, no permanent damage just week.
I went back to the doctor yesterday and everything is stable.
It's just going to take a while to get back
to full strength. They've got me on a medication routine
that should keep the possibility of another one at bay.
(21:36):
Thanks for checking in on me. So I just wanted
to update you on that because he is a huge
part of the homeless community here in Nashville. He was
homeless here for five years. Now he is not, and
now he has committed his life to serving the homeless
here and I just adore him and think he's an
amazing person. He has a lot on his plate and
(21:57):
now he is dealing with this. So if you all
could just keep Stephen in your prayers, that would be awesome.
And I bring him up in this thing as well,
because I want to go over simple idea of some
winter homeless kits that you could keep in your car
as it starts to get cold outside and when you're
driving around. If you're single, this could be a great
(22:18):
thing for you to do. If you've got a boyfriend
or husband, maybe you all could get together to do it,
but especially if you have kids, this is an awesome
thing to do as a family. So here's what we're
going to be doing in our family. I'm going to
get some big ziploc bags, the big plastic kind, and
I'm gonna have a beanie on hand for each bag.
(22:40):
I'm gonna do a pair of gloves. I'm gonna do
a pair of socks. And here's something I learned from
my friend Steven. Giving a homeless person a big bag
of cheap socks that has twelve pair in it that
you got at Walmart or Target on sale or whatever,
don't do that. I'd rather you take the money that
you spent on twelve socks and by one really good
(23:02):
pair of socks that is going to go much further
with someone that is cold and sleeping outside. That is
a better gift to them than getting ten socks. They
don't need to be rotating out their socks. They're not
worried about that. They're worried about staying warm, and those
cheap ones they don't do it. So that is one
thing that Stephen taught us last year when he came
(23:23):
on the podcast. I'm going to throw in a scarf.
Some body wipes, even baby wipes work just as well,
depending on what you're able to find. A travel toothbrush,
travel toothpaste, chapstick definitely a big thing during the winter.
Some granola bars and other snacks. I'm gonna do some nuts.
But the kids also wanted to throw in some of
(23:45):
their Halloween candy because they thought that would be a
nice treat, which I totally agree. Some people might be like, no,
you don't need to give them candy, but they should
enjoy the things in life like we get to enjoy.
And in fact, like in a Snicker's or a Reese's cup,
there's some peanut butter in there, which is more satisfying
and has something to it. Then maybe I don't know,
(24:05):
like a bag of Skittles, Like we're gonna give them
some good, hardy type candy. You could also add deodorant
if you wanted to, some hand lotion small first aid
kits cough drops is another good one. And then if
the weather is really cold, depending on where you live
in the country, you maybe could throw in some of
those hot hand warming packs. I think that's a great idea.
And then everything can go inside that big old zip
(24:28):
block bag and then when you hand it to them,
maybe if you have some bottles of water also in
your car, if that'll fit in the bag, great, but
if not, you could just give them the water and
the bag. Oh and then another thing I didn't mention here,
but just popped in my head that I think we're
gonna do is like a gift card to a McDonald's
or maybe even some cash. When I'm on my way
to work, I pass a couple of the same homeless
(24:50):
people every day, and I know that two blocks from
there there's a McDonald's, So I think I'm gonna do
McDonald's because I know that's close by and they can
go get a warm coffee or a hamburger or hot
biscuit or whatever they choose to get. But you know,
just think of where you see certain people and if
you have the opportunity to bless them in this way,
that would be awesome. Because the weather is getting really
(25:11):
cold out and it was snowing here the other day
in Nashville, and I just feel as though we went
from warmish fall weather to boom, super cold, and that's
a big adjustment for people, especially if you're you're living outside.
So I mean, just think about it, and then this
is another time where you can really practice gratitude and
be thankful for the things that you have in your
(25:33):
life that keep you warm, whether it's a jacket, nice boots,
a car, a house, hot food, gloves stuff like that. Okay,
well that is it on this thing. I just wanted
to share with you all what we're going to be
doing in our house now that it's getting cold out
and quickly, I'll just say Steven's website again in case
you all want to make a donation to his organization.
(25:55):
It's home Street Home t in dot org and the
tienas for tennis. See again, I can vouch that he
is doing wonderful things here. So if you're looking for
a place to give this holiday season, that might be
an awesome place for you to donate. So for the
(26:18):
last thing today, I'm gonna leave you with a quote
that I thought was pretty awesome. You've probably heard it before,
but it's something that just really has resonated with me
lately because I spend a lot of times worrying about
other things, or maybe other people and what they might
be thinking or what they're doing, and really I need
(26:39):
to oftentimes just look in the mirror. So this quote
comes from Aldus Huxley. Pretty sure that's how you say
his name. Sorry if I got that wrong, but here's
the quote. There's only one corner of the universe you
can be certain of improving, and that's yourself boom, your corner.
That is what you can focus on. Because unless you're
(27:02):
willing to put in the work and work on yourself
and look in the mirror and really face some things,
then I think you're just going to be extremely disappointed
in trying to look at everything else for improvement. You
can be in control of improving yourself. I say this
quote right now to remind me and to encourage you,
(27:23):
and I'm also going to share with you right now
the Headspace app. I maybe have talked about it before,
but I thought it falls in line with this quote,
so I'm gonna bring it up now anyways. But it
is a meditation app, and that is one way where
you can be more mindful and center yourself and deal
with stress and anxiety, sleep problems, if you're having trouble focusing.
(27:46):
It kind of can help you out with a lot
of different things. But you can start out with just
three minutes a day. They do have a basic pack
which is free. This isn't a commercial, by the way.
This I'm just letting you know the details, but you
can get like an upgraded package, which is a subscription
which can cost you a monthly fee. But if you're
looking to build some healthy habits, and maybe you're looking
(28:06):
to be more mindful and meditate than I encourage you
to check out the Headspace app and y'all can join
me in doing that. I've done a few different meditation apps.
This is just currently the one that that I'm on.
I don't know, I may have another one to recommend
for y'all. I would love it. If you have any
that you want to recommend to me, please send them
to me. Or if there's any YouTube videos or anything
(28:28):
that's kind of worked for you to help with mindfulness
and meditation. I am not an expert when it comes
to this, but it's something that I am trying to
do more of, so I thought I would share that
with y'all. I'll say the quote one more time before
we totally wrap. There's only one corner of the universe
you can be certain of improving, and that is yourself.
(28:48):
I'll just Huxley all right, hope you'll have a great
rest of your week, and I'll see you next Tuesday
for the fifth thing.
Feeling Things with Amy & Kat News
Host
Amy Brown
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