November 28, 2024 • 31 mins
WATCH THE FULL EPISODE ON OUR YOUTUBE CHANNEL HERE!
ACC Head G Lane joins Manaia Stewart to regurgitate the best topics from his morning on the Hauraki Breakfast including the most elaborate excuses you've used to get out of something and the worst pranks you've seen (0:00).
Then the fellas take a deep dive into all of the action from Day 1 of the Black Caps 1st Test against England at Hagley Oval; who won, who lost and what record is Tim Southee closing in on? (12:28).
Finally, they get to your feedback in 'Yours Please' (23:30).
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Life for the X would be a Gaden studio and
brought to you is always by Export Ultra of the
Beer for here. This is the Agenda Podcast for Friday,
the twenty ninth of November.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
The Agenda Podcast the home of sporting nonsense and clap trap,
brought to you by Export a Culture.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
Day two of the Test match starts today at eleven
o'clock and we'll get to the recap of day one.
A very eventful day one and just a few moments time.
But Lane, you're on breakfast this morning. So he I
was on Hardaki this morning.
Speaker 3 (00:29):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (00:30):
What was firing up the listeners on Hidaki breakfast this morning?
Speaker 3 (00:33):
Wow? It was the story about the South Korean individual
who got out of He tried to get out of
compulsory military service by putting on weight and becoming too
a beast to serve. So he ballooned out to one
hundred and three kg's which I thought, that's not it's
not a bird. But he's five ft six Okay, that's huge.
So and he got a one year suspended sentence and
(00:56):
his mate who who heat threw under the bar and
said he came up with the idea. He got six
months just.
Speaker 4 (01:02):
For coming up with the idea. Yeah, why would you
get ben for that? I know, that's what I said.
Speaker 3 (01:06):
I was like, how did he throw why did he
throw him under the bus?
Speaker 4 (01:09):
That he made me do it?
Speaker 3 (01:10):
Yeah, defence, Yeah, and it works, he said. He gave
me the idea and told me what to eat anyway.
The line the line was down there, what have you
done to get out of something? And I told a
story ever made at school who let a firework off
on his face to get off the French exam.
Speaker 4 (01:24):
In his own face.
Speaker 3 (01:25):
Yeah, and he he steed me in the back because
him and I used to sit together in French in
year eleven, so fifth form for school Sea and we
fucking sucked at French. And like Miss Baylis's teacher hated us,
should separate us every class. We have to sit in
the corners. And we cheated all year in the in
the internal exams, you know how you and then if
you can't sit the exam at the end of the year,
(01:45):
they do an agritat of your scores throughout the year.
And he led a firework off into his face like
a week before exam and he got eighty six percent
in an agritat I sat it and got he four percent.
Now I'm gonna say, Sam Haslam, I was way better
at French than you. You you were looking at a
(02:07):
twenty percent or below, and you let a Roman candle
off in your face so you can get an aggregat.
And I thought that was pretty extreme. So people work.
Though it did work, some people said turn. One guy
said it told to get out of her committing to
a long term relationship. He told her he had leukemia.
Oh my god, he said, I don't feel good about myself.
But it was effective.
Speaker 4 (02:28):
Well, and then she was like and then she benned him.
Speaker 3 (02:31):
No, yeah, no, he broke up because he said, I've
got leukemia. I can't put you through it. Blah blah blah.
Speaker 1 (02:35):
Oh right, yeah, I thought he said I've got leukemia
and she said, oh, I'm out.
Speaker 4 (02:38):
And you guys are perfect for each other.
Speaker 3 (02:42):
And then loads of people who've like one guy worked
with a guy who had seven grandparents die.
Speaker 4 (02:47):
Yeah, stuff like that.
Speaker 3 (02:49):
But I said, you get when the argument was you
can have as many uncles and aunties die as you
want because a lot of people they don't need to
be blood relatives to call them uncle or auntie. Yeah,
you know, everyone's got a family friend that you just
call uncle Steve or whatever. It's pretty suspicious pretty quickly, Yeah,
it does.
Speaker 4 (03:05):
And the moving.
Speaker 3 (03:06):
Jobs that resets.
Speaker 1 (03:07):
Yeah, but like you would know if multiple of my
grandparents have died.
Speaker 3 (03:12):
Yeah, I'm starting to go. It depends what kind of
family situation you've come from though as well, because some
people do have up to six grandparents. Well if they
come from a you know, if they're a step child
or come into a blended family and you've got everyone's
got four dam Yeah. Yeah, but you're right, you could
have a you could have you could have eight. Yeah.
So there's a lot of a lot of that chat
going on a lot of funerals. One guy got out
(03:34):
of an exam at university by saying, is his grandfather
had died? And the lecturer said, what, that's really sad,
But if we're going to pass you in a kind
of an agritech kind rule, we need a proof that
he's dead. And he went home and on PowerPoint created
the service sheet for his funeral and put a photo
(03:54):
of his granddad. He said, a really poor job, and
then he bought that the next day. Here's the from
the funeral here's the pamphlet, doctor the whole thing.
Speaker 1 (04:03):
Uh yeah, that is pretty that is pretty bad. I
had not to get out of something. But I had
a mate who has mate pranked him by doctoring up
a fake news article and he made the whole He
wrote the article. He took photos from my mate's Facebook
page from years ago and photoshopped like a little hitler
(04:24):
mo onto him and then put it up and it
was just like, you know, Christ church Man photographed and
blah blah blah blah blah, may may not have been
a member of the the Forces at one point, and
just and sent it send him. So then uploaded that
to a website, sent him the link so that when
he clicked the link, here's the fucking page of the newspaper.
Speaker 4 (04:46):
And he but he'd actually just docked it all up.
Speaker 1 (04:48):
And so my mate for freaked out deactivated all of
his social media accounts.
Speaker 3 (04:53):
I was like, so that just a prank.
Speaker 4 (04:54):
It was just a prank.
Speaker 1 (04:55):
I was like, that is way too fucking far, Like,
how did you get through that whole thing and not
go hang on?
Speaker 3 (05:02):
We actually talked about pranks as well. We know it's confessionals.
You can confess a sin and I confess that I
hollowed out an oreo and replaced it with toothpaste and
gave it to my children last night.
Speaker 4 (05:12):
Last night, what to make them brush their teeth?
Speaker 3 (05:16):
No, just them stealing the oreos. Oh yeah, that's not bad.
I had the oreos are for lunch. He opened a
packet and just disappears, and they're like, who all the oreos?
It's like three kids on the couch going shack like
I don't know, Like, well, it wasn't fucking me, it
wasn't your mum, it wasn't the dog.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
And they're like, and so you put the toothpaste on what?
And then put them back in the package to see who? Great,
Ye did you find the culprit?
Speaker 3 (05:46):
Yes, Ralph the oldest did he come in?
Speaker 1 (05:49):
And that's like, and I've told this story before, but
at the boarding school I went to before I was there, uh,
there were these kids doing beer in the sort of
ceiling cavity.
Speaker 3 (06:03):
It'll we brew situation going on, thanks man, brewing beers.
It's quite a pungent thing to do, but so does
a boys hostel. But you actually, when come to think
of it, the process of brewing does smell like my
son's room.
Speaker 4 (06:17):
It's that kind of musty, yeasty kind of men.
Speaker 3 (06:20):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:21):
Yeah, And so the guys that were in the dormed
in they found the set up and instead of just
like bringing everyone into the common room, they put laxatives
into the brew and then they waited.
Speaker 3 (06:36):
It was about a week later after.
Speaker 1 (06:37):
It was like bottled or whatever, and people drinking it
and everyone who shit themselves.
Speaker 3 (06:42):
They rounded them up, disciplined them. It's a real long
bow that one. That's yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
But honestly, like we've talked about boarding school before, but
it's like prison. It's just a bunch of decades sitting around.
They got nothing but time. All they do is just
think about doing the dumbest shit that you could possibly
think of. Yeah and so yeah, but then some of
the matrons they're sitting around thinking about.
Speaker 3 (07:04):
What's going on. Ye they know, they know what's up.
They're going to find their own fun as well. I
had a friend who started a pawn club at boarding school,
so he had quite a significant supply of mags, but
he also had some videos as well, and he managed
to get a key to the French room at the
far end of one of the locks, and he sent
(07:25):
out an invite and everyon had to pay like two
bucks or something, and he hitted it and two bucks
and he then put a projector down and put it
into the VCR and did a basically a screening. Yeah. Fuck,
I don't know why we thought we would get away
with it, But of course immediately our teacher has walked
(07:45):
past at eleven thirty at night and the fucking French
room was lit up like a Christmas tree with pawn
on the fucking water, and they just storm in and
there's just twelve dudes in the room watching. They didn't
even give ou money back.
Speaker 4 (08:00):
That is so far you knew the RESCU when you've
paid up there two dollars.
Speaker 1 (08:05):
That's so funny you say that we did the exact
same thing at university because in our whole you could
rent or not rent, but you could borrow a projector
if you wanted to do like a group studying session
so that everyone could look at the same thing. We'd
be like, yep, Friday night, we're doing a group study session.
None of us are studying the same shit. Your pee
kids got English kids, and we just rent out the
(08:26):
projector and then we're in whoever's got the biggest room.
Speaker 3 (08:29):
It's like there's twelve DDes in there, but everyone's studying this.
Speaker 4 (08:33):
Yeah, we're well a eighty inch.
Speaker 1 (08:40):
Projection of just the most heinous shit you did to
say in your life.
Speaker 3 (08:46):
I met a week ago.
Speaker 1 (08:47):
Yeah, you gotta get anywhere around the world, they'll be
doing the exact same thing. Okay, so it was pranking people. Yeah,
and what have you done to get out of here?
Speaker 3 (08:55):
Yeah? Pretty much. And we had a good discussion on
star signs and I just don't get signs right. And
do females just sit around talking about star signs with
each other? Yeah, I don't know because I couldn't tell
you one you give me a date. Yeah, I'll be like,
no idea.
Speaker 4 (09:12):
Yours is cancer, isn't it?
Speaker 3 (09:14):
I did have cancer? Yeah, you don't have it anymore?
What does that? Should? Just joke your here on this podcast? Right?
Speaker 4 (09:27):
Long time? La cancer?
Speaker 3 (09:35):
No, that was a lot biggest cashion around there. And
what's the point? And yeah, I know what it is.
I think I figured I think I figured it out.
It's fantasy sports for checks.
Speaker 4 (09:44):
Yes, yes it is. It's because it doesn't make sense.
Speaker 1 (09:48):
It doesn't make sense, it doesn't matter, it's not real
but you let it impaged every facet of your life.
Speaker 3 (09:54):
And also I'm massively burnt by it because as an
underage drinker trying to get into bars and Hamil and
I had a fake ID and every time they would
give me because I'd memorize my birthday everything, I'd fucking
nail it a false name everything, there's nothing they couldn't
spell it whatever, And then they just say, what's your
star signed? I'm like, you, motherfucker, ha, that's brilliant. Yeah.
(10:16):
And as soon as he hears the take you got
star sign, you got and you get out of here. Ah.
So I'm quite I'm a little bit. I've got a
little bit of PTSD around star signs because of that fact,
because I don't know them.
Speaker 4 (10:27):
That would have been you're in to learn all of
the stars.
Speaker 3 (10:29):
I refused.
Speaker 1 (10:30):
Also, never trust a dude who knows all the stars signs, correct,
particularly if.
Speaker 4 (10:35):
You're a woman that meets a dude and he knows
them all.
Speaker 3 (10:37):
He's running an angle here and either that or you're
not going to have any kids to him and he's
going to break out with you later on because he's
a Capricorn.
Speaker 1 (10:47):
All right, let us take a quick break, we'll come
back and we'll recap the first day of the cricketing test.
Speaker 4 (10:55):
Just before we get into the cricket lane.
Speaker 1 (10:56):
Last night, I was driving the ute home and I
got stuck in the Auckland traffic. YEP guy pulls up
next to me and honks his horn and I wind
my window down look out. Then I guess, I mean you, bro,
is that a later model front on that thing? I
was like, Oh, I'm not too sure, broad yeah, because
what year is it? We're stuck in traffic, like, oh,
(11:17):
that's a ninety eight And he's like, yeah, well no
I don't have to I think the lights are a
bit different on thee anyway.
Speaker 4 (11:23):
Looks mean, Bro, I love it. I love that it's
black awesome. And I was like, you can bid for
it on.
Speaker 3 (11:30):
You hours.
Speaker 4 (11:31):
Well, that's the thing. This is the last day.
Speaker 1 (11:33):
It's your last chance to bid on our nineteen ninety
eight Ford Falcon that main We're not having a later
model front on it on Auto Trader. All proceeds going
to November n Z. The auction closes at five pm
to night right the Friday. So if you listen to
this on Saturday, you've cooked it. So if you listen
to this right now and you've been interested in this
you at all, it is still hovering around twelve grand.
Speaker 3 (11:53):
Yes, but as we know with auctions, they just they
start to heat up at it and they do, Yeah,
I remember you got the five grand with a free
shit in there, so who So really it's it's seven grand.
Speaker 1 (12:01):
We're looking at one thousand dollars of petrol vouchers, same
worth of grocery vouchers, iPhone sixteen pro Marshall amp beer
fridge in a Mikita job site radio. So it's basically
a five thousand dollars discount on this ute. And like
you said, last chance to bid on that classic Kiwi
Text Yute to three two three six for a direct
link to the listing and while you're there, tell New
(12:23):
Zealand about your car for free. On Auto Trader Day
one Summer Cricket. It was cricket and Christmas yesterday and
it was an absolute scorcher down there in christ Hitch
at Hagley Oval. I've got the entire score sheet on
the back page here. We finished the day three nineteen
for eight. Saudi and Phillips still at the starts. Kan
(12:44):
Williamson dismissed for ninety three, Latham forty seven, Ravendra thirty
four and Glenn Phillips still chipping away there on forty one.
Speaker 4 (12:53):
So eight wickets in three hundred and nineteen runs. It's
pretty good day.
Speaker 3 (12:57):
It's not bad, but I think it could have been better,
and I think would be a bit disappointed that they're
not three nineteen for five, yeah, or four, because everyone
got a start. Rational Avenger he looked great for his
thirty four. He hit a full toss of Bashers straight
to midwicket. It was a terrible, terrible ball and he'll
(13:17):
be kicking himself about that. Everyone else got a start.
In terms of Latham with forty seven, he's the only
one who got a delivery that was a wicket ball
right caught behind. Admittedly Conway was that was a sharp
chance at Canson caught in Bold was good as well.
But Williamson at ninety three when something got a bit
big on him and he just spooned it to point.
The same thing happened to Daryl ma Sure he just
(13:37):
skuied one, got sucked into the bouncer game. Blundell he
got seventeen again, kind of a soft dismissal as well
on the cut shot. But Sheer got four wickets the
orthodox right arm offee. Yeah, that didn't nothing look threatening.
Speaker 4 (13:52):
No, he wasn't doing nah.
Speaker 3 (13:54):
So I think that's probably the biggest gift four Test
wickets for Shower Basher ever have. But Phillips he look good.
He was taking the attack to them. They looked pretty
tired at the end there. It was a hot day
and that northwester was parnishing. Oh my god. And Stokes
didn't have a great day. Drop the cats. You got
a bit of tap with the ball. It was getting
(14:15):
a little bit frustrated.
Speaker 4 (14:16):
They were bowlers.
Speaker 3 (14:17):
We're getting a bit a bit upset. Yeah. They were
bitching about the foot the footmarks and the foothold and
through the crease.
Speaker 4 (14:25):
Which was a bit slippery because they kept falling over.
Speaker 3 (14:27):
Yeah. So look, did in bowl great, But we didn't
that great either, you know what I mean. So it's
fairly even. But if we can fart to three point
thirty because the average score first innings at Hagley is
only about two seventy. Right, So we're here to part now.
But my worry is that that picture is not it's
(14:48):
not as spicy as previous years Hagley, but saying that's
Matt Henry with a new pill in his hand when
that seam is hard and we've got a fair you know,
not inexperienced. But there's some new batsmen in there, and
the likes of Jacob Bethel, Bethel's bleach. But you got
(15:08):
Zach Crawley and Duckett opening and got Bleach at first, right,
then you got Roote Brooke and Ollie Pope. So it's
a fairly fairly formidable batting lineup. Yeah, with this Bethel
Feller come from. This is the first time, I mean
his debut as well. But yeah, he's bowling. You've got
a few overs. He got one over, I got one over.
He went for five. Yeah, we call it Jacob Beth
(15:28):
always got the peroxide bleached. Here, Betel's bleach, we're calling him. Yeah,
he's never batted three before and he's now making his
dis debut and betting three. It's such bears. It's such
a bears game gamble, isn't it. It's yeah, it will
it pay off?
Speaker 1 (15:44):
I don't know's beIN Duckett in the flesh for the
first time in my life. Yesterday yesterday what does it.
Day before when we were out there watching them warm up,
Lord of the Rings extra, the shortest professional athlete I've
ever seen in my life. It was actually like it
was so no noticeable how short he is, and I
reckon it's a massive advantage.
Speaker 3 (16:03):
Well, yeah, the short balls, A good length ball was short.
He can go back and pulling cut that's right. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (16:09):
And then just the way that you'd have to change
your length because of how comically short this dude is.
Speaker 3 (16:15):
And then at the other end you've got Zach Crawley,
who's about six three, yeah, six four, he's huge. He's
one of the biggest opening batsman in world cricket, batting
with one of the shortest yes openers in world cricket.
Speaker 4 (16:25):
It's like a left right combination. Yeah, it is that bamboozling.
Speaker 3 (16:28):
You're right. Actually, I think I'd rather bowlder a left
and right hander, yeah, than a midget and a giant.
That's right.
Speaker 1 (16:34):
It's a it's a brilliant tactic. They just have, you know,
an absolute zoo of players out there. This guy's lefty,
this guy's righty. This guy's six foot four, this guy's
four foot six.
Speaker 3 (16:44):
Yeah, there's the batting is a bit of a worry.
The bowling didn't look great from England, I must have.
It didn't. Chris Wokes didn't look quite the Chris Wokes
of the past because he was I always found him
quite metronomical and he was Glean McGrath back of a
length top of off. Yeah, I felt he was just
sprang it around a little bit. And that's our first
look at Gus Atkinson and Brighton cass with the great ass. Yeah,
(17:08):
and he couldn't stand on his feet.
Speaker 2 (17:10):
It didn't.
Speaker 3 (17:11):
They didn't put any fear up any of the Batsmen
and they all got themselves out really, like I was saying,
apart from potentially Latham and Conway who got you know,
they were good dismissals.
Speaker 4 (17:22):
Revenge was run in particular, he'd be so he'd.
Speaker 3 (17:24):
Be kicking himself for that, you would be for you mean, yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 4 (17:28):
It looks like how it was. The last man stands
with it.
Speaker 3 (17:30):
Yeah, charging down full toss straight to midwork out and
you're like he would.
Speaker 1 (17:34):
Just be like ah, sort of half pulled out of
it and sort of just off the toe that yeah.
Speaker 3 (17:40):
Yeah, but that was good to get everyone back together
face you see commentary and Lee heart Jason Hoyt and
Jeremy Wells Lee Baker yesterday, and Tony Lyle was in
there as well, and down some strange angles around. Lee
and Jeremy revealed when they went to commentary school down
and willing yeah, because we're talking. I think Lyle had
(18:03):
a boiled sweet in his mouth and while commentary yeah,
and the guys are saying, look, you know, down at
commentary school, it's one of the first things we get towards.
You cannot commentate with something in your mouth, and that
to ram at home, Jeremy Coney stood up and put
himself in Waddle's mouth while he tried to call it
over to illustrate you, to illustrate the point and how
(18:25):
uncomfortable it is to listen to someone with a mouth
full and commentate, And so Tony immediately spat it out
and said, your point taken.
Speaker 1 (18:32):
You know, even the visual you don't need to see it.
We're sitting we do the podcast where the commentary is
done as well. There are notes written on pads in
front of me, a couple of score updates, an illustration
of a fielding set up, and then I've got to
text you nipple, Okay, Bgeriola. This is the note that's
(18:56):
written on the pad in front of me. The New
Zealand peer is set two balls prior. Does that mean
the New Zealand pier is set two balls prior. I
don't know what that means at all.
Speaker 3 (19:07):
That means at all.
Speaker 1 (19:07):
And then the next one is I just wonder if
England and then it doesn't, and then it stops.
Speaker 3 (19:12):
I've got bones stress an Ivory Coast, Cote Devoir.
Speaker 1 (19:18):
Yeah, so I don't know that sounds like reckless note
writing as well. That is halfway down the page and
then at the bottom of the page a blank page.
Speaker 4 (19:27):
I have someone in fron with that.
Speaker 5 (19:28):
Guys, that is from the byc if you were to choose,
who would have ridden something like that in the corner.
Speaker 4 (19:35):
So still a commentator just wrong day.
Speaker 1 (19:37):
Who writes the first note on a blank page halfway
down it?
Speaker 3 (19:42):
This is a man who picks a new pad up
every day. Yeah, well, so they're punt's looking good. They
put one hundred dollars on from the tab hunch money
on Williamson top scoring ye, but also as a counter
our game day hunch, we put a honey on Glenn
Phillips been top scorer, So we've hedged it. Yeah, we've
hedged it. He was paying ten to fifty though the
(20:03):
top score, so there's a lot more money on that
than Williamson who was only three fifty.
Speaker 1 (20:07):
He's got a long way to go to because he's
only on forty one. I mean it's pretty safe. So
what he would score another fifty?
Speaker 3 (20:12):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (20:12):
Where at three eighty by the end three ninety almost
four hundred.
Speaker 3 (20:16):
Expecting big things from him, but he's got Saudi in
support with him. How good would it be if Soudy
managed to beat his top score in his last series
against England, in which he got his initial seventy seven.
Speaker 4 (20:31):
Yeah, I wonder that would be incredible.
Speaker 1 (20:35):
What is the most annoying time for us to get
out for the English team?
Speaker 3 (20:40):
You know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (20:41):
Because I always find this so annoying, like whenever I
used to play, and even when you're watching it, it's
always so annoying. You wake up, you go out there,
you warm up your bowl for like two overs, and
then all of a sudden you're back in the shed
and then you get to come out and.
Speaker 3 (20:54):
I think if we can bat for an hour, that
will really piss them off because That means they have
to come out an hour before lunch. Yeah, and do
they go for of course they're going to go for
the runs because they're playing baseball, but that's going to
be nigglie. An hour before lunch. That means that New
Zealanders can go hard for an hour, get back in
the sheds of forty minutes, get to rup down and
(21:14):
come out and go hard. Yeah, so an hour it
would be good open.
Speaker 1 (21:17):
Yeah, yeah, that would be the most annoying. And do
you reckon that's what their thing is. I don't think
they've got a number now. I think I think they've
got a number.
Speaker 3 (21:24):
I think three point fifty would be right, would be on,
would target for them, But so you never know. With
Sow when his bettings got he's all over the place
and he's just looking for that length border heave through
caw corner.
Speaker 4 (21:36):
He got a hold of one.
Speaker 1 (21:37):
Oh he did, he got a he got one four,
but I think it was about a one bounce four. Yeah,
all right, so coverage resumes. I look at it, it'll
be underway by the time you're listening to this. Don't
get caught out of the fact that the on the TV.
It's on TV and Z I know a lot of
people looking for it on Sky. Yeah it's but check
(21:57):
us on the old iHeartRadio, which you will have figured
out how to use. But now, all right, let's take
one more quick break and then we'll get to some
of the yours please, as we haven't done while we're
on the road, just quickly before we get into yours, please,
Live Fitness and Movember have put mindset exercise on all
of the gym machines. The kiwis can strengthen their minds
between sets. Now I know this lane not because I
(22:19):
work at the ACC, but because I.
Speaker 3 (22:21):
Go to the gym quite often.
Speaker 1 (22:22):
I don't like to you, I don't like to talk
about it the gym, but in this instance I will.
So they've what they've done is they've put up these
QR codes around next to the machines. So because I
know you see it all the time, people they'll finish
their set and then they'll just sit there and just
doom scroll and then often they'll get stuck there for
like ten minutes and design out and they're like, oh shit, sorry,
(22:43):
and then get back to do it. So Life Fitness
and November have been like, look, how do we look,
how do we look at making that time a bit
more useful. So they've put these gym QR codes around
the gym, scan them and then they'll give you a
couple of little mintw weeks sizes they do in between mindsets,
a couple of mind sets, some sets of mindsets, and
(23:05):
then that way you're going to be stronger mentally and
physically when you walk out of the ending.
Speaker 4 (23:09):
On top of that, you will not deck around for.
Speaker 1 (23:11):
So long between the sets, yes, which will improve everyone
else's mental health around you as well.
Speaker 4 (23:16):
So look out for those around the place they'll be in.
Speaker 1 (23:20):
There are a lot of gyms, I mean certainly the
one that I was at this morning, yep, and then
the guy I was with, So I check these out
as like scan it mate, you might get me in
your ears telling you what today.
Speaker 3 (23:31):
Well myself for Jemmy Wells.
Speaker 4 (23:32):
Yeah, that's right.
Speaker 1 (23:34):
So look out for those mindset QR codes and work
out your most important body part.
Speaker 3 (23:39):
Your mind.
Speaker 4 (23:40):
Now it's time for yours, please, yours.
Speaker 2 (23:43):
Please brought you by leader home of.
Speaker 4 (23:48):
Five of them to get through this morning. First call
of yours.
Speaker 6 (23:50):
Please get a magn it just on the tap market
surely we can get one for some saldi to surpass.
Speaker 3 (23:58):
One hundred Test match sexes.
Speaker 6 (24:01):
He's got what seven innings to get six six sixes.
Speaker 3 (24:05):
I reckon you can get it done. I'd love to
put a wee cheeky drop on that one. I don't
mind that.
Speaker 1 (24:10):
Don't mean if he got two this morning, then he's
looking at one in in Inx.
Speaker 3 (24:15):
But that's if he gets in. Should we ask car
and TB and sports book.
Speaker 1 (24:19):
Yeah, see if we can get something on that. The
sports book will be out later on today as well.
Thank you very much for the call. Another call here
yours please?
Speaker 6 (24:27):
Yeah, you get our fellas just on the not leaving
your beer mottels around the office. I think as we
come into the festive season, people need to remember the
parable of the slowest antelope. You know, it's the slowest
antelope that gets eaten by the lines. It's fine a
Christmas dude, get pursed. Do whatever you want. Don't be
the don't be the story, don't be the drunkest, don't
make the biggest mess, don't make the biggest you know,
(24:48):
insult to the boss, and just cruise through. Everyone's talking
about the drunkest guy, not the second drunkest guy. Hooru.
Speaker 3 (24:55):
That's the problem. They don't you don't know you're the
drunkest till the morning. Yeah, that's the that's that's the
great conundrum. Well, yeah, this is the problem.
Speaker 1 (25:03):
And also I would I appreciate the parable, but it's
not the slowest antelope. It's the leader of the peloton
as the one everyone talks about. It's the one who's
way out in front. That's why you just got to
sit right there in the peloton, in the pack draft
off the back of someone else. But I would also
say the other part of that is, once someone is
quite clearly the story, you've got free rang absolutely like
(25:25):
go helpful leather after there. But there will be a
lot of people on new jobs. Particularly that's where it
becomes hazardous. If you've been working there for a long time,
it's sort of it's all right, you know, people have
seen what you're capable of.
Speaker 3 (25:37):
But it's that first Christmas party. Yeah, stay away from
the CEO, say that anyone you report to. Yeah, just
just just give arms length.
Speaker 1 (25:46):
Yeah, stick with the people on your on your pay
scale and you'll be fine. I'm sure we'll get to
more fest of seasoned advice as the week's drag on.
Towards the end, here another caller here yours.
Speaker 7 (26:01):
Can yeah, megan talking about the old Kevin durand board
spot broadcast betting. That's fun, funny, I said. Another one
of these fellas won some money on some fella doing
the old scratch and sniff basketball pre three free throw routine.
I reckon, you guys should run a little cheeky, little
(26:22):
acc sports book. You have to be absolute nonsense and
it'd have to be non monetary value. Three bears, three chips.
Speaker 3 (26:29):
Free, free free now mendel uh, Yeah, I have.
Speaker 1 (26:37):
I have talked to the BIT about this kind of
shit quite often, and the biggest problem that they have
is obviously for transparency issues, they need to have a
real clear different definition of what it is that you're
gambling on and what is like, how do we know
that it's happened. That's why the scratch and sniff was
such a squirrelly one, because it's like, now, what did
he scratch?
Speaker 3 (26:59):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (27:00):
Because it was quick.
Speaker 3 (27:01):
I think Also, I think there's some sort of legislative
kind of issue around the TAB because TAB, technically owned
by the government, have licensed it out to entain Australia
to run it, but essentially it is the one and
only betting platform in New Zealand, and I think to
do comedy bets like what's the sex of the of
(27:24):
Prince William's third child that kind of thing, or what's
the weight of the child and that kind of that's
kind of interesting. It actually doesn't sit within the current
law of the tab and the New Zealand Racing Board
and gambling, so there's a bit more squirrely shit going
on around. They can't just go and make a odd
up that's not sports related or backed by statistics or.
Speaker 1 (27:47):
You know what I mean, because then they could pull
the odds out of their ass.
Speaker 3 (27:50):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (27:51):
So but in Trump's America, the Land of the Free,
they can, Yeah.
Speaker 3 (27:54):
They can. In England's the same. In England, a guy
won a bunch of money. He bet on his four
year old playing for England in football and he put
like one hundred pounds on and I think William Hill
gave him some stupid odd yeah right, so in just
some book. Yeah, some bookie gave him some odds and
it came in and he won, you know, a couple
of hundred thousand pounds. I like it. Yeah, that kind
(28:16):
of stuff. That stuff, that's what they get to do
over there. But here was still kind of still a
little bit backwards and the fact that we now one
and only bidding platform as government owned.
Speaker 1 (28:27):
Yeah, I was just trying to think of what kind
of future I could bet on myself. Like, I guarantee
I'll have fifteen beers down by the time the sunsets tonight.
Speaker 3 (28:36):
Yeah, but that's very No one's going to take those
odds on twenty five, twenty four and a half go over.
Speaker 1 (28:45):
I'll beming made at do it. But then, okay, I
think we've got two more, two more yours space.
Speaker 8 (28:51):
Hey, boys, you're talking about a conference or division system
and super Rubia. There was in the mid twenty tens.
It was an Aussie New Zealand and two SOFAFRAN conferences.
And people keep complaigning because there was a fucking shit
Aussie team that keep making it through to the semi
finals because they were the best team on the worst conference. Anyway, No,
(29:14):
I probably doesn't really because that was the time when
Crusaders suck.
Speaker 3 (29:19):
I get it, but I mean that's what conferences do, though,
you know, like I think you take with good with
the bed.
Speaker 4 (29:26):
Also, like I know, we talked about it.
Speaker 1 (29:28):
Was it last year where it was some team made
it into the Super Rugby Finals playoffs.
Speaker 4 (29:34):
And they had the rebels, wasn't that?
Speaker 5 (29:35):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (29:35):
And they had like a massive negative one loss record,
and yeah, it's kind of called. They get into the playoffs,
they inevitably get humped in the first round and it's
basically a bye week for whoever plays them.
Speaker 3 (29:47):
It's not that bad.
Speaker 1 (29:49):
But also we just want the conferences so that we
just play our own teams more.
Speaker 3 (29:54):
One last call to hear your space, gentlemen.
Speaker 5 (29:58):
There was a bit of chat, I think it was
last week during the French game for a yellow card.
What sort of cheer the players should be sitting on?
I got to thinking, it's called a sunburn, right, or
it used to be called a sunburn?
Speaker 3 (30:10):
So what sort of ben.
Speaker 5 (30:13):
Should they get? A ben? What sort of ben should
they be sitting in? Throw that French riffer in the burn?
Speaker 3 (30:18):
Jesus Christ, can oscar the grouch type bin would be good? Yeah,
trash can and you just they hop in it and
when you put the trash can lid on it, and
when the tens up, you take the trash can lid
off and they come out.
Speaker 1 (30:31):
They oscar the grouch out of the The referee runs over,
but now with the new rule where they review it,
they lift the trash head. Sorry mate, that's actually a red,
and then they put the trash can back down there.
Speaker 4 (30:44):
Okay, yeah, that's great.
Speaker 3 (30:45):
Yeah. I think it needs to be that because you
can't wheelly. Bin's just a bit yeah, but too modern.
Speaker 1 (30:49):
I think it needs to be what about like a
skip Oh yeah, too big, A.
Speaker 3 (30:54):
Little bit too big. I mean we talked about it
should be more humiliating, like a toilet seat and you
have to pull your pants down and sit on it. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (31:00):
I would say that the plastic Bunnings cheer is pretty
humili Yeah, that's that's up.
Speaker 3 (31:04):
There may be a camp toer, like like a really
small camp, like a puff Oh no camp hit like
camping right yeah sorry, camping chip.
Speaker 4 (31:12):
Yeah no, I was just thinking like the ottoman over there.
Speaker 3 (31:15):
Yeah no, no, no, no camp like so when you
go when you go to camp?
Speaker 1 (31:20):
Yeah, sorry, miscommunication, Yeah, no camping. All right, let's look
this thing on the head. We will be recording the
sports book straight after this, and other than that, we'll
see you on Monday for another episode of the gender podcast.
Speaker 3 (31:36):
You've been listening to.
Speaker 2 (31:37):
The ACC's a gender podcast brought to you by Export Ultra.
For more episodes, like and follow on iHeartRadio. You get
your podcast
Life for the X would be a Gaden studio and
brought to you is always by Export Ultra of the
Beer for here. This is the Agenda Podcast for Friday,
the twenty ninth of November.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
The Agenda Podcast the home of sporting nonsense and clap trap,
brought to you by Export a Culture.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
Day two of the Test match starts today at eleven
o'clock and we'll get to the recap of day one.
A very eventful day one and just a few moments time.
But Lane, you're on breakfast this morning. So he I
was on Hardaki this morning.
Speaker 3 (00:29):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (00:30):
What was firing up the listeners on Hidaki breakfast this morning?
Speaker 3 (00:33):
Wow? It was the story about the South Korean individual
who got out of He tried to get out of
compulsory military service by putting on weight and becoming too
a beast to serve. So he ballooned out to one
hundred and three kg's which I thought, that's not it's
not a bird. But he's five ft six Okay, that's huge.
So and he got a one year suspended sentence and
(00:56):
his mate who who heat threw under the bar and
said he came up with the idea. He got six
months just.
Speaker 4 (01:02):
For coming up with the idea. Yeah, why would you
get ben for that? I know, that's what I said.
Speaker 3 (01:06):
I was like, how did he throw why did he
throw him under the bus?
Speaker 4 (01:09):
That he made me do it?
Speaker 3 (01:10):
Yeah, defence, Yeah, and it works, he said. He gave
me the idea and told me what to eat anyway.
The line the line was down there, what have you
done to get out of something? And I told a
story ever made at school who let a firework off
on his face to get off the French exam.
Speaker 4 (01:24):
In his own face.
Speaker 3 (01:25):
Yeah, and he he steed me in the back because
him and I used to sit together in French in
year eleven, so fifth form for school Sea and we
fucking sucked at French. And like Miss Baylis's teacher hated us,
should separate us every class. We have to sit in
the corners. And we cheated all year in the in
the internal exams, you know how you and then if
you can't sit the exam at the end of the year,
(01:45):
they do an agritat of your scores throughout the year.
And he led a firework off into his face like
a week before exam and he got eighty six percent
in an agritat I sat it and got he four percent.
Now I'm gonna say, Sam Haslam, I was way better
at French than you. You you were looking at a
(02:07):
twenty percent or below, and you let a Roman candle
off in your face so you can get an aggregat.
And I thought that was pretty extreme. So people work.
Though it did work, some people said turn. One guy
said it told to get out of her committing to
a long term relationship. He told her he had leukemia.
Oh my god, he said, I don't feel good about myself.
But it was effective.
Speaker 4 (02:28):
Well, and then she was like and then she benned him.
Speaker 3 (02:31):
No, yeah, no, he broke up because he said, I've
got leukemia. I can't put you through it. Blah blah blah.
Speaker 1 (02:35):
Oh right, yeah, I thought he said I've got leukemia
and she said, oh, I'm out.
Speaker 4 (02:38):
And you guys are perfect for each other.
Speaker 3 (02:42):
And then loads of people who've like one guy worked
with a guy who had seven grandparents die.
Speaker 4 (02:47):
Yeah, stuff like that.
Speaker 3 (02:49):
But I said, you get when the argument was you
can have as many uncles and aunties die as you
want because a lot of people they don't need to
be blood relatives to call them uncle or auntie. Yeah,
you know, everyone's got a family friend that you just
call uncle Steve or whatever. It's pretty suspicious pretty quickly, Yeah,
it does.
Speaker 4 (03:05):
And the moving.
Speaker 3 (03:06):
Jobs that resets.
Speaker 1 (03:07):
Yeah, but like you would know if multiple of my
grandparents have died.
Speaker 3 (03:12):
Yeah, I'm starting to go. It depends what kind of
family situation you've come from though as well, because some
people do have up to six grandparents. Well if they
come from a you know, if they're a step child
or come into a blended family and you've got everyone's
got four dam Yeah. Yeah, but you're right, you could
have a you could have you could have eight. Yeah.
So there's a lot of a lot of that chat
going on a lot of funerals. One guy got out
(03:34):
of an exam at university by saying, is his grandfather
had died? And the lecturer said, what, that's really sad,
But if we're going to pass you in a kind
of an agritech kind rule, we need a proof that
he's dead. And he went home and on PowerPoint created
the service sheet for his funeral and put a photo
(03:54):
of his granddad. He said, a really poor job, and
then he bought that the next day. Here's the from
the funeral here's the pamphlet, doctor the whole thing.
Speaker 1 (04:03):
Uh yeah, that is pretty that is pretty bad. I
had not to get out of something. But I had
a mate who has mate pranked him by doctoring up
a fake news article and he made the whole He
wrote the article. He took photos from my mate's Facebook
page from years ago and photoshopped like a little hitler
(04:24):
mo onto him and then put it up and it
was just like, you know, Christ church Man photographed and
blah blah blah blah blah, may may not have been
a member of the the Forces at one point, and
just and sent it send him. So then uploaded that
to a website, sent him the link so that when
he clicked the link, here's the fucking page of the newspaper.
Speaker 4 (04:46):
And he but he'd actually just docked it all up.
Speaker 1 (04:48):
And so my mate for freaked out deactivated all of
his social media accounts.
Speaker 3 (04:53):
I was like, so that just a prank.
Speaker 4 (04:54):
It was just a prank.
Speaker 1 (04:55):
I was like, that is way too fucking far, Like,
how did you get through that whole thing and not
go hang on?
Speaker 3 (05:02):
We actually talked about pranks as well. We know it's confessionals.
You can confess a sin and I confess that I
hollowed out an oreo and replaced it with toothpaste and
gave it to my children last night.
Speaker 4 (05:12):
Last night, what to make them brush their teeth?
Speaker 3 (05:16):
No, just them stealing the oreos. Oh yeah, that's not bad.
I had the oreos are for lunch. He opened a
packet and just disappears, and they're like, who all the oreos?
It's like three kids on the couch going shack like
I don't know, Like, well, it wasn't fucking me, it
wasn't your mum, it wasn't the dog.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
And they're like, and so you put the toothpaste on what?
And then put them back in the package to see who? Great,
Ye did you find the culprit?
Speaker 3 (05:46):
Yes, Ralph the oldest did he come in?
Speaker 1 (05:49):
And that's like, and I've told this story before, but
at the boarding school I went to before I was there, uh,
there were these kids doing beer in the sort of
ceiling cavity.
Speaker 3 (06:03):
It'll we brew situation going on, thanks man, brewing beers.
It's quite a pungent thing to do, but so does
a boys hostel. But you actually, when come to think
of it, the process of brewing does smell like my
son's room.
Speaker 4 (06:17):
It's that kind of musty, yeasty kind of men.
Speaker 3 (06:20):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:21):
Yeah, And so the guys that were in the dormed
in they found the set up and instead of just
like bringing everyone into the common room, they put laxatives
into the brew and then they waited.
Speaker 3 (06:36):
It was about a week later after.
Speaker 1 (06:37):
It was like bottled or whatever, and people drinking it
and everyone who shit themselves.
Speaker 3 (06:42):
They rounded them up, disciplined them. It's a real long
bow that one. That's yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
But honestly, like we've talked about boarding school before, but
it's like prison. It's just a bunch of decades sitting around.
They got nothing but time. All they do is just
think about doing the dumbest shit that you could possibly
think of. Yeah and so yeah, but then some of
the matrons they're sitting around thinking about.
Speaker 3 (07:04):
What's going on. Ye they know, they know what's up.
They're going to find their own fun as well. I
had a friend who started a pawn club at boarding school,
so he had quite a significant supply of mags, but
he also had some videos as well, and he managed
to get a key to the French room at the
far end of one of the locks, and he sent
(07:25):
out an invite and everyon had to pay like two
bucks or something, and he hitted it and two bucks
and he then put a projector down and put it
into the VCR and did a basically a screening. Yeah. Fuck,
I don't know why we thought we would get away
with it, But of course immediately our teacher has walked
(07:45):
past at eleven thirty at night and the fucking French
room was lit up like a Christmas tree with pawn
on the fucking water, and they just storm in and
there's just twelve dudes in the room watching. They didn't
even give ou money back.
Speaker 4 (08:00):
That is so far you knew the RESCU when you've
paid up there two dollars.
Speaker 1 (08:05):
That's so funny you say that we did the exact
same thing at university because in our whole you could
rent or not rent, but you could borrow a projector
if you wanted to do like a group studying session
so that everyone could look at the same thing. We'd
be like, yep, Friday night, we're doing a group study session.
None of us are studying the same shit. Your pee
kids got English kids, and we just rent out the
(08:26):
projector and then we're in whoever's got the biggest room.
Speaker 3 (08:29):
It's like there's twelve DDes in there, but everyone's studying this.
Speaker 4 (08:33):
Yeah, we're well a eighty inch.
Speaker 1 (08:40):
Projection of just the most heinous shit you did to
say in your life.
Speaker 3 (08:46):
I met a week ago.
Speaker 1 (08:47):
Yeah, you gotta get anywhere around the world, they'll be
doing the exact same thing. Okay, so it was pranking people. Yeah,
and what have you done to get out of here?
Speaker 3 (08:55):
Yeah? Pretty much. And we had a good discussion on
star signs and I just don't get signs right. And
do females just sit around talking about star signs with
each other? Yeah, I don't know because I couldn't tell
you one you give me a date. Yeah, I'll be like,
no idea.
Speaker 4 (09:12):
Yours is cancer, isn't it?
Speaker 3 (09:14):
I did have cancer? Yeah, you don't have it anymore?
What does that? Should? Just joke your here on this podcast? Right?
Speaker 4 (09:27):
Long time? La cancer?
Speaker 3 (09:35):
No, that was a lot biggest cashion around there. And
what's the point? And yeah, I know what it is.
I think I figured I think I figured it out.
It's fantasy sports for checks.
Speaker 4 (09:44):
Yes, yes it is. It's because it doesn't make sense.
Speaker 1 (09:48):
It doesn't make sense, it doesn't matter, it's not real
but you let it impaged every facet of your life.
Speaker 3 (09:54):
And also I'm massively burnt by it because as an
underage drinker trying to get into bars and Hamil and
I had a fake ID and every time they would
give me because I'd memorize my birthday everything, I'd fucking
nail it a false name everything, there's nothing they couldn't
spell it whatever, And then they just say, what's your
star signed? I'm like, you, motherfucker, ha, that's brilliant. Yeah.
(10:16):
And as soon as he hears the take you got
star sign, you got and you get out of here. Ah.
So I'm quite I'm a little bit. I've got a
little bit of PTSD around star signs because of that fact,
because I don't know them.
Speaker 4 (10:27):
That would have been you're in to learn all of
the stars.
Speaker 3 (10:29):
I refused.
Speaker 1 (10:30):
Also, never trust a dude who knows all the stars signs, correct,
particularly if.
Speaker 4 (10:35):
You're a woman that meets a dude and he knows
them all.
Speaker 3 (10:37):
He's running an angle here and either that or you're
not going to have any kids to him and he's
going to break out with you later on because he's
a Capricorn.
Speaker 1 (10:47):
All right, let us take a quick break, we'll come
back and we'll recap the first day of the cricketing test.
Speaker 4 (10:55):
Just before we get into the cricket lane.
Speaker 1 (10:56):
Last night, I was driving the ute home and I
got stuck in the Auckland traffic. YEP guy pulls up
next to me and honks his horn and I wind
my window down look out. Then I guess, I mean you, bro,
is that a later model front on that thing? I
was like, Oh, I'm not too sure, broad yeah, because
what year is it? We're stuck in traffic, like, oh,
(11:17):
that's a ninety eight And he's like, yeah, well no
I don't have to I think the lights are a
bit different on thee anyway.
Speaker 4 (11:23):
Looks mean, Bro, I love it. I love that it's
black awesome. And I was like, you can bid for
it on.
Speaker 3 (11:30):
You hours.
Speaker 4 (11:31):
Well, that's the thing. This is the last day.
Speaker 1 (11:33):
It's your last chance to bid on our nineteen ninety
eight Ford Falcon that main We're not having a later
model front on it on Auto Trader. All proceeds going
to November n Z. The auction closes at five pm
to night right the Friday. So if you listen to
this on Saturday, you've cooked it. So if you listen
to this right now and you've been interested in this
you at all, it is still hovering around twelve grand.
Speaker 3 (11:53):
Yes, but as we know with auctions, they just they
start to heat up at it and they do, Yeah,
I remember you got the five grand with a free
shit in there, so who So really it's it's seven grand.
Speaker 1 (12:01):
We're looking at one thousand dollars of petrol vouchers, same
worth of grocery vouchers, iPhone sixteen pro Marshall amp beer
fridge in a Mikita job site radio. So it's basically
a five thousand dollars discount on this ute. And like
you said, last chance to bid on that classic Kiwi
Text Yute to three two three six for a direct
link to the listing and while you're there, tell New
(12:23):
Zealand about your car for free. On Auto Trader Day
one Summer Cricket. It was cricket and Christmas yesterday and
it was an absolute scorcher down there in christ Hitch
at Hagley Oval. I've got the entire score sheet on
the back page here. We finished the day three nineteen
for eight. Saudi and Phillips still at the starts. Kan
(12:44):
Williamson dismissed for ninety three, Latham forty seven, Ravendra thirty
four and Glenn Phillips still chipping away there on forty one.
Speaker 4 (12:53):
So eight wickets in three hundred and nineteen runs. It's
pretty good day.
Speaker 3 (12:57):
It's not bad, but I think it could have been better,
and I think would be a bit disappointed that they're
not three nineteen for five, yeah, or four, because everyone
got a start. Rational Avenger he looked great for his
thirty four. He hit a full toss of Bashers straight
to midwicket. It was a terrible, terrible ball and he'll
(13:17):
be kicking himself about that. Everyone else got a start.
In terms of Latham with forty seven, he's the only
one who got a delivery that was a wicket ball
right caught behind. Admittedly Conway was that was a sharp
chance at Canson caught in Bold was good as well.
But Williamson at ninety three when something got a bit
big on him and he just spooned it to point.
The same thing happened to Daryl ma Sure he just
(13:37):
skuied one, got sucked into the bouncer game. Blundell he
got seventeen again, kind of a soft dismissal as well
on the cut shot. But Sheer got four wickets the
orthodox right arm offee. Yeah, that didn't nothing look threatening.
Speaker 4 (13:52):
No, he wasn't doing nah.
Speaker 3 (13:54):
So I think that's probably the biggest gift four Test
wickets for Shower Basher ever have. But Phillips he look good.
He was taking the attack to them. They looked pretty
tired at the end there. It was a hot day
and that northwester was parnishing. Oh my god. And Stokes
didn't have a great day. Drop the cats. You got
a bit of tap with the ball. It was getting
(14:15):
a little bit frustrated.
Speaker 4 (14:16):
They were bowlers.
Speaker 3 (14:17):
We're getting a bit a bit upset. Yeah. They were
bitching about the foot the footmarks and the foothold and
through the crease.
Speaker 4 (14:25):
Which was a bit slippery because they kept falling over.
Speaker 3 (14:27):
Yeah. So look, did in bowl great, But we didn't
that great either, you know what I mean. So it's
fairly even. But if we can fart to three point
thirty because the average score first innings at Hagley is
only about two seventy. Right, So we're here to part now.
But my worry is that that picture is not it's
(14:48):
not as spicy as previous years Hagley, but saying that's
Matt Henry with a new pill in his hand when
that seam is hard and we've got a fair you know,
not inexperienced. But there's some new batsmen in there, and
the likes of Jacob Bethel, Bethel's bleach. But you got
(15:08):
Zach Crawley and Duckett opening and got Bleach at first, right,
then you got Roote Brooke and Ollie Pope. So it's
a fairly fairly formidable batting lineup. Yeah, with this Bethel
Feller come from. This is the first time, I mean
his debut as well. But yeah, he's bowling. You've got
a few overs. He got one over, I got one over.
He went for five. Yeah, we call it Jacob Beth
(15:28):
always got the peroxide bleached. Here, Betel's bleach, we're calling him. Yeah,
he's never batted three before and he's now making his
dis debut and betting three. It's such bears. It's such
a bears game gamble, isn't it. It's yeah, it will
it pay off?
Speaker 1 (15:44):
I don't know's beIN Duckett in the flesh for the
first time in my life. Yesterday yesterday what does it.
Day before when we were out there watching them warm up,
Lord of the Rings extra, the shortest professional athlete I've
ever seen in my life. It was actually like it
was so no noticeable how short he is, and I
reckon it's a massive advantage.
Speaker 3 (16:03):
Well, yeah, the short balls, A good length ball was short.
He can go back and pulling cut that's right. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (16:09):
And then just the way that you'd have to change
your length because of how comically short this dude is.
Speaker 3 (16:15):
And then at the other end you've got Zach Crawley,
who's about six three, yeah, six four, he's huge. He's
one of the biggest opening batsman in world cricket, batting
with one of the shortest yes openers in world cricket.
Speaker 4 (16:25):
It's like a left right combination. Yeah, it is that bamboozling.
Speaker 3 (16:28):
You're right. Actually, I think I'd rather bowlder a left
and right hander, yeah, than a midget and a giant.
That's right.
Speaker 1 (16:34):
It's a it's a brilliant tactic. They just have, you know,
an absolute zoo of players out there. This guy's lefty,
this guy's righty. This guy's six foot four, this guy's
four foot six.
Speaker 3 (16:44):
Yeah, there's the batting is a bit of a worry.
The bowling didn't look great from England, I must have.
It didn't. Chris Wokes didn't look quite the Chris Wokes
of the past because he was I always found him
quite metronomical and he was Glean McGrath back of a
length top of off. Yeah, I felt he was just
sprang it around a little bit. And that's our first
look at Gus Atkinson and Brighton cass with the great ass. Yeah,
(17:08):
and he couldn't stand on his feet.
Speaker 2 (17:10):
It didn't.
Speaker 3 (17:11):
They didn't put any fear up any of the Batsmen
and they all got themselves out really, like I was saying,
apart from potentially Latham and Conway who got you know,
they were good dismissals.
Speaker 4 (17:22):
Revenge was run in particular, he'd be so he'd.
Speaker 3 (17:24):
Be kicking himself for that, you would be for you mean, yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 4 (17:28):
It looks like how it was. The last man stands
with it.
Speaker 3 (17:30):
Yeah, charging down full toss straight to midwork out and
you're like he would.
Speaker 1 (17:34):
Just be like ah, sort of half pulled out of
it and sort of just off the toe that yeah.
Speaker 3 (17:40):
Yeah, but that was good to get everyone back together
face you see commentary and Lee heart Jason Hoyt and
Jeremy Wells Lee Baker yesterday, and Tony Lyle was in
there as well, and down some strange angles around. Lee
and Jeremy revealed when they went to commentary school down
and willing yeah, because we're talking. I think Lyle had
(18:03):
a boiled sweet in his mouth and while commentary yeah,
and the guys are saying, look, you know, down at
commentary school, it's one of the first things we get towards.
You cannot commentate with something in your mouth, and that
to ram at home, Jeremy Coney stood up and put
himself in Waddle's mouth while he tried to call it
over to illustrate you, to illustrate the point and how
(18:25):
uncomfortable it is to listen to someone with a mouth
full and commentate, And so Tony immediately spat it out
and said, your point taken.
Speaker 1 (18:32):
You know, even the visual you don't need to see it.
We're sitting we do the podcast where the commentary is
done as well. There are notes written on pads in
front of me, a couple of score updates, an illustration
of a fielding set up, and then I've got to
text you nipple, Okay, Bgeriola. This is the note that's
(18:56):
written on the pad in front of me. The New
Zealand peer is set two balls prior. Does that mean
the New Zealand pier is set two balls prior. I
don't know what that means at all.
Speaker 3 (19:07):
That means at all.
Speaker 1 (19:07):
And then the next one is I just wonder if
England and then it doesn't, and then it stops.
Speaker 3 (19:12):
I've got bones stress an Ivory Coast, Cote Devoir.
Speaker 1 (19:18):
Yeah, so I don't know that sounds like reckless note
writing as well. That is halfway down the page and
then at the bottom of the page a blank page.
Speaker 4 (19:27):
I have someone in fron with that.
Speaker 5 (19:28):
Guys, that is from the byc if you were to choose,
who would have ridden something like that in the corner.
Speaker 4 (19:35):
So still a commentator just wrong day.
Speaker 1 (19:37):
Who writes the first note on a blank page halfway
down it?
Speaker 3 (19:42):
This is a man who picks a new pad up
every day. Yeah, well, so they're punt's looking good. They
put one hundred dollars on from the tab hunch money
on Williamson top scoring ye, but also as a counter
our game day hunch, we put a honey on Glenn
Phillips been top scorer, So we've hedged it. Yeah, we've
hedged it. He was paying ten to fifty though the
(20:03):
top score, so there's a lot more money on that
than Williamson who was only three fifty.
Speaker 1 (20:07):
He's got a long way to go to because he's
only on forty one. I mean it's pretty safe. So
what he would score another fifty?
Speaker 3 (20:12):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (20:12):
Where at three eighty by the end three ninety almost
four hundred.
Speaker 3 (20:16):
Expecting big things from him, but he's got Saudi in
support with him. How good would it be if Soudy
managed to beat his top score in his last series
against England, in which he got his initial seventy seven.
Speaker 4 (20:31):
Yeah, I wonder that would be incredible.
Speaker 1 (20:35):
What is the most annoying time for us to get
out for the English team?
Speaker 3 (20:40):
You know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (20:41):
Because I always find this so annoying, like whenever I
used to play, and even when you're watching it, it's
always so annoying. You wake up, you go out there,
you warm up your bowl for like two overs, and
then all of a sudden you're back in the shed
and then you get to come out and.
Speaker 3 (20:54):
I think if we can bat for an hour, that
will really piss them off because That means they have
to come out an hour before lunch. Yeah, and do
they go for of course they're going to go for
the runs because they're playing baseball, but that's going to
be nigglie. An hour before lunch. That means that New
Zealanders can go hard for an hour, get back in
the sheds of forty minutes, get to rup down and
(21:14):
come out and go hard. Yeah, so an hour it
would be good open.
Speaker 1 (21:17):
Yeah, yeah, that would be the most annoying. And do
you reckon that's what their thing is. I don't think
they've got a number now. I think I think they've
got a number.
Speaker 3 (21:24):
I think three point fifty would be right, would be on,
would target for them, But so you never know. With
Sow when his bettings got he's all over the place
and he's just looking for that length border heave through
caw corner.
Speaker 4 (21:36):
He got a hold of one.
Speaker 1 (21:37):
Oh he did, he got a he got one four,
but I think it was about a one bounce four. Yeah,
all right, so coverage resumes. I look at it, it'll
be underway by the time you're listening to this. Don't
get caught out of the fact that the on the TV.
It's on TV and Z I know a lot of
people looking for it on Sky. Yeah it's but check
(21:57):
us on the old iHeartRadio, which you will have figured
out how to use. But now, all right, let's take
one more quick break and then we'll get to some
of the yours please, as we haven't done while we're
on the road, just quickly before we get into yours, please,
Live Fitness and Movember have put mindset exercise on all
of the gym machines. The kiwis can strengthen their minds
between sets. Now I know this lane not because I
(22:19):
work at the ACC, but because I.
Speaker 3 (22:21):
Go to the gym quite often.
Speaker 1 (22:22):
I don't like to you, I don't like to talk
about it the gym, but in this instance I will.
So they've what they've done is they've put up these
QR codes around next to the machines. So because I
know you see it all the time, people they'll finish
their set and then they'll just sit there and just
doom scroll and then often they'll get stuck there for
like ten minutes and design out and they're like, oh shit, sorry,
(22:43):
and then get back to do it. So Life Fitness
and November have been like, look, how do we look,
how do we look at making that time a bit
more useful. So they've put these gym QR codes around
the gym, scan them and then they'll give you a
couple of little mintw weeks sizes they do in between mindsets,
a couple of mind sets, some sets of mindsets, and
(23:05):
then that way you're going to be stronger mentally and
physically when you walk out of the ending.
Speaker 4 (23:09):
On top of that, you will not deck around for.
Speaker 1 (23:11):
So long between the sets, yes, which will improve everyone
else's mental health around you as well.
Speaker 4 (23:16):
So look out for those around the place they'll be in.
Speaker 1 (23:20):
There are a lot of gyms, I mean certainly the
one that I was at this morning, yep, and then
the guy I was with, So I check these out
as like scan it mate, you might get me in
your ears telling you what today.
Speaker 3 (23:31):
Well myself for Jemmy Wells.
Speaker 4 (23:32):
Yeah, that's right.
Speaker 1 (23:34):
So look out for those mindset QR codes and work
out your most important body part.
Speaker 3 (23:39):
Your mind.
Speaker 4 (23:40):
Now it's time for yours, please, yours.
Speaker 2 (23:43):
Please brought you by leader home of.
Speaker 4 (23:48):
Five of them to get through this morning. First call
of yours.
Speaker 6 (23:50):
Please get a magn it just on the tap market
surely we can get one for some saldi to surpass.
Speaker 3 (23:58):
One hundred Test match sexes.
Speaker 6 (24:01):
He's got what seven innings to get six six sixes.
Speaker 3 (24:05):
I reckon you can get it done. I'd love to
put a wee cheeky drop on that one. I don't
mind that.
Speaker 1 (24:10):
Don't mean if he got two this morning, then he's
looking at one in in Inx.
Speaker 3 (24:15):
But that's if he gets in. Should we ask car
and TB and sports book.
Speaker 1 (24:19):
Yeah, see if we can get something on that. The
sports book will be out later on today as well.
Thank you very much for the call. Another call here
yours please?
Speaker 6 (24:27):
Yeah, you get our fellas just on the not leaving
your beer mottels around the office. I think as we
come into the festive season, people need to remember the
parable of the slowest antelope. You know, it's the slowest
antelope that gets eaten by the lines. It's fine a
Christmas dude, get pursed. Do whatever you want. Don't be
the don't be the story, don't be the drunkest, don't
make the biggest mess, don't make the biggest you know,
(24:48):
insult to the boss, and just cruise through. Everyone's talking
about the drunkest guy, not the second drunkest guy. Hooru.
Speaker 3 (24:55):
That's the problem. They don't you don't know you're the
drunkest till the morning. Yeah, that's the that's that's the
great conundrum. Well, yeah, this is the problem.
Speaker 1 (25:03):
And also I would I appreciate the parable, but it's
not the slowest antelope. It's the leader of the peloton
as the one everyone talks about. It's the one who's
way out in front. That's why you just got to
sit right there in the peloton, in the pack draft
off the back of someone else. But I would also
say the other part of that is, once someone is
quite clearly the story, you've got free rang absolutely like
(25:25):
go helpful leather after there. But there will be a
lot of people on new jobs. Particularly that's where it
becomes hazardous. If you've been working there for a long time,
it's sort of it's all right, you know, people have
seen what you're capable of.
Speaker 3 (25:37):
But it's that first Christmas party. Yeah, stay away from
the CEO, say that anyone you report to. Yeah, just
just just give arms length.
Speaker 1 (25:46):
Yeah, stick with the people on your on your pay
scale and you'll be fine. I'm sure we'll get to
more fest of seasoned advice as the week's drag on.
Towards the end, here another caller here yours.
Speaker 7 (26:01):
Can yeah, megan talking about the old Kevin durand board
spot broadcast betting. That's fun, funny, I said. Another one
of these fellas won some money on some fella doing
the old scratch and sniff basketball pre three free throw routine.
I reckon, you guys should run a little cheeky, little
(26:22):
acc sports book. You have to be absolute nonsense and
it'd have to be non monetary value. Three bears, three chips.
Speaker 3 (26:29):
Free, free free now mendel uh, Yeah, I have.
Speaker 1 (26:37):
I have talked to the BIT about this kind of
shit quite often, and the biggest problem that they have
is obviously for transparency issues, they need to have a
real clear different definition of what it is that you're
gambling on and what is like, how do we know
that it's happened. That's why the scratch and sniff was
such a squirrelly one, because it's like, now, what did
he scratch?
Speaker 3 (26:59):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (27:00):
Because it was quick.
Speaker 3 (27:01):
I think Also, I think there's some sort of legislative
kind of issue around the TAB because TAB, technically owned
by the government, have licensed it out to entain Australia
to run it, but essentially it is the one and
only betting platform in New Zealand, and I think to
do comedy bets like what's the sex of the of
(27:24):
Prince William's third child that kind of thing, or what's
the weight of the child and that kind of that's
kind of interesting. It actually doesn't sit within the current
law of the tab and the New Zealand Racing Board
and gambling, so there's a bit more squirrely shit going
on around. They can't just go and make a odd
up that's not sports related or backed by statistics or.
Speaker 1 (27:47):
You know what I mean, because then they could pull
the odds out of their ass.
Speaker 3 (27:50):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (27:51):
So but in Trump's America, the Land of the Free,
they can, Yeah.
Speaker 3 (27:54):
They can. In England's the same. In England, a guy
won a bunch of money. He bet on his four
year old playing for England in football and he put
like one hundred pounds on and I think William Hill
gave him some stupid odd yeah right, so in just
some book. Yeah, some bookie gave him some odds and
it came in and he won, you know, a couple
of hundred thousand pounds. I like it. Yeah, that kind
(28:16):
of stuff. That stuff, that's what they get to do
over there. But here was still kind of still a
little bit backwards and the fact that we now one
and only bidding platform as government owned.
Speaker 1 (28:27):
Yeah, I was just trying to think of what kind
of future I could bet on myself. Like, I guarantee
I'll have fifteen beers down by the time the sunsets tonight.
Speaker 3 (28:36):
Yeah, but that's very No one's going to take those
odds on twenty five, twenty four and a half go over.
Speaker 1 (28:45):
I'll beming made at do it. But then, okay, I
think we've got two more, two more yours space.
Speaker 8 (28:51):
Hey, boys, you're talking about a conference or division system
and super Rubia. There was in the mid twenty tens.
It was an Aussie New Zealand and two SOFAFRAN conferences.
And people keep complaigning because there was a fucking shit
Aussie team that keep making it through to the semi
finals because they were the best team on the worst conference. Anyway, No,
(29:14):
I probably doesn't really because that was the time when
Crusaders suck.
Speaker 3 (29:19):
I get it, but I mean that's what conferences do, though,
you know, like I think you take with good with
the bed.
Speaker 4 (29:26):
Also, like I know, we talked about it.
Speaker 1 (29:28):
Was it last year where it was some team made
it into the Super Rugby Finals playoffs.
Speaker 4 (29:34):
And they had the rebels, wasn't that?
Speaker 5 (29:35):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (29:35):
And they had like a massive negative one loss record,
and yeah, it's kind of called. They get into the playoffs,
they inevitably get humped in the first round and it's
basically a bye week for whoever plays them.
Speaker 3 (29:47):
It's not that bad.
Speaker 1 (29:49):
But also we just want the conferences so that we
just play our own teams more.
Speaker 3 (29:54):
One last call to hear your space, gentlemen.
Speaker 5 (29:58):
There was a bit of chat, I think it was
last week during the French game for a yellow card.
What sort of cheer the players should be sitting on?
I got to thinking, it's called a sunburn, right, or
it used to be called a sunburn?
Speaker 3 (30:10):
So what sort of ben.
Speaker 5 (30:13):
Should they get? A ben? What sort of ben should
they be sitting in? Throw that French riffer in the burn?
Speaker 3 (30:18):
Jesus Christ, can oscar the grouch type bin would be good? Yeah,
trash can and you just they hop in it and
when you put the trash can lid on it, and
when the tens up, you take the trash can lid
off and they come out.
Speaker 1 (30:31):
They oscar the grouch out of the The referee runs over,
but now with the new rule where they review it,
they lift the trash head. Sorry mate, that's actually a red,
and then they put the trash can back down there.
Speaker 4 (30:44):
Okay, yeah, that's great.
Speaker 3 (30:45):
Yeah. I think it needs to be that because you
can't wheelly. Bin's just a bit yeah, but too modern.
Speaker 1 (30:49):
I think it needs to be what about like a
skip Oh yeah, too big, A.
Speaker 3 (30:54):
Little bit too big. I mean we talked about it
should be more humiliating, like a toilet seat and you
have to pull your pants down and sit on it. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (31:00):
I would say that the plastic Bunnings cheer is pretty
humili Yeah, that's that's up.
Speaker 3 (31:04):
There may be a camp toer, like like a really
small camp, like a puff Oh no camp hit like
camping right yeah sorry, camping chip.
Speaker 4 (31:12):
Yeah no, I was just thinking like the ottoman over there.
Speaker 3 (31:15):
Yeah no, no, no, no camp like so when you
go when you go to camp?
Speaker 1 (31:20):
Yeah, sorry, miscommunication, Yeah, no camping. All right, let's look
this thing on the head. We will be recording the
sports book straight after this, and other than that, we'll
see you on Monday for another episode of the gender podcast.
Speaker 3 (31:36):
You've been listening to.
Speaker 2 (31:37):
The ACC's a gender podcast brought to you by Export Ultra.
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