Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
It's Ashley and the jam In Morning Show with DJ
Foreign and Sautia, and it's.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
Time for another DM dilemma.
Speaker 3 (00:09):
All right, babes. We have a little thing called DM dilemma.
Speaker 4 (00:14):
And you know, I think a lot of times you
might have something going on in your life and everybody
in your circle is just too close to the situation, right,
Like I already have a preconceived notion about Joey the
X that my friend dated, So I'm always going to
feel the type of way about Joey, and then I
won't be able to really give you an unopinionated opinion.
Speaker 5 (00:35):
Yeah, because you always think a bunch of friends.
Speaker 3 (00:37):
Yeah, because I always want to slap Joey.
Speaker 4 (00:39):
So anyways, if you're going through it and you have
a little dilemma in your life and you need somebody
who you know kind of doesn't know anybody in the
situation to give you an.
Speaker 3 (00:49):
Opinion, We're here for you.
Speaker 4 (00:50):
You can always DM me at Ashley Feldman to ease
on the Ashley. You can stay anonymous like our girl
today and you know we'll do our best and everybody else.
Speaker 3 (00:59):
Can you know way in as well.
Speaker 4 (01:02):
Obviously she wants to stay anonymous. She said, I've been
dating this guy for six months. It's been going great.
I've met his family, we went to a family party,
et cetera. My family live is out of state, but
they have met him via FaceTime. We met on Facebook dating,
and he has shown continuous effort and I know he
really likes me. I stay over his place often. We
(01:25):
have talked about even being exclusive with each other. But
when I mentioned him taking down his Facebook dating app,
he says, I'm not ready. He has mentioned that he's
scared of commitment and sorry, I feel like I'm all
over the place. But basically, should I be worried that
he won't take down his dating profile?
Speaker 5 (01:43):
Absolutely, that guy does not want to be in a
relationship though.
Speaker 6 (01:47):
He said, I'm not cool with a commitment. Right.
Speaker 3 (01:50):
He mentioned her that he is scared commitment.
Speaker 5 (01:54):
Which I feel like sometimes. Yeah, it's another way of
him saying he doesn't you know what I mean nothing,
He's really scared of me.
Speaker 6 (01:59):
He's problem here.
Speaker 4 (02:01):
She's kind of saying, everything's been going so well, We've
met each other's families, all these things.
Speaker 3 (02:07):
Is this a major red flag?
Speaker 7 (02:08):
Like?
Speaker 3 (02:09):
Should she dump him?
Speaker 5 (02:10):
Well? She wants more?
Speaker 1 (02:11):
Right, sounds like that I mean, I can now she
wants a relationship with him clearly.
Speaker 6 (02:16):
Boom.
Speaker 1 (02:16):
Yeah, Well, what's the problem he's not committing? Boom, problem solved?
Move on.
Speaker 6 (02:24):
How do you tell you what we want? And then
you come back and be like, oh, well, I think
I can know. He told you he doesn't want to commit.
Why you're sitting here scratching your head wondering what's going on?
You've got your answer. He'd been told you.
Speaker 4 (02:36):
So that's my devil's advocate here. He is everything she
wants in a man and all of the things except
for that.
Speaker 3 (02:45):
Is this like break up worthy?
Speaker 4 (02:47):
Should she cut her her losses here and move on
or should she just keep trying to fight the good
fight and hope that sooner or later he's like, fine,
I will get rid of my Facebook getting it, by
the way, that would make me feel a whole type
of way.
Speaker 6 (02:59):
Honestly, got to weigh the pros and the corns. Are
you okay with him still? You know, wanting to be
out here because they're not exclusive. Obviously they've talked about
being together, but they're not together, right, That's how I'm assuming,
like they've he's met the family. They kind of.
Speaker 3 (03:13):
Thought about her, Are you hooking up with other people?
Speaker 6 (03:16):
I'm sure she's not, but he is.
Speaker 5 (03:19):
That seems pretty clear. I think that's what he likes
about this.
Speaker 6 (03:21):
But it sounds to me like he's being honest with
her and tell him that, Like, look like what dating?
We're cool?
Speaker 4 (03:25):
We vi She said that she's by the way, she's
live texting me as we speak. She are dming. She said,
they are both both exclusive, not hooking up with the people.
But you know what, it would make me feel like
he's just on there waiting to see if something better comes.
Speaker 3 (03:40):
Yeah, that would hurt my heart.
Speaker 5 (03:42):
Yeah, hurt exclusive. What's the difference in being in a relationship? Nothing?
Speaker 4 (03:46):
Nothing, And this is just going She can say all
she wants that she's not worried about it.
Speaker 3 (03:51):
He can have that. This is going to eat her alive. Yeah,
but is it worth breaking up over?
Speaker 5 (03:55):
They've only because she wants something specific and he doesn't
down the line there exactly. This is the way around.
Speaker 6 (04:02):
If she really believes that in what she wants is
a relationship and a man, a husband or whatever, and
this guy is not offering that, why you here, move on?
Speaker 4 (04:12):
I'm saying to her, what exactly does he say when
you ask him to take down profile.
Speaker 6 (04:18):
Because I'll tell you what, as long as he knows
that this is what you want, and you're still I guess,
not allowing him, but he still knows that he could
be on this dating site and you're kind of like
succumbing to that. He's going to continue doing his own thing.
Speaker 3 (04:30):
Yeah, he's going to tell you got to put Yeah, you.
Speaker 6 (04:32):
Got to put your foot down and tell him, hey,
listen me and you vibe. And that's the only contention
that I have with you is Facebook.
Speaker 4 (04:38):
Dating, honestly, And all my friends are going through this,
and I just want to I just want to slap
guys sometimes because why would you not take down the
stupid profile? But you want to meet her parents, you're
introducing her to your family, you're doing sleepovers every night.
Speaker 3 (04:53):
Why is potential all that effort and then not take
down the dating part?
Speaker 1 (04:57):
Because this potential or this potential and these options in
this convenience.
Speaker 4 (05:01):
I said, what exactly does he say when you say
you need to take down the profile? He's very quick
to change the subject and says he's not ready.
Speaker 6 (05:07):
How old are there?
Speaker 5 (05:08):
That's a good question. It sounds like he's going yeah,
but you know what, I want to be shocked if
they were on the late twenties and too.
Speaker 6 (05:14):
That's what I'm thinking her broken twenties or thirties, early
thirties of late twenties, he'd better be young.
Speaker 3 (05:20):
They're both twenty nine.
Speaker 5 (05:21):
Yes, he's a girl, please, that's just playing games he's starting.
Speaker 6 (05:26):
It's just he's not going to think about settling until
his mid to late thirties.
Speaker 5 (05:30):
Orange he finds the one and maybe she's not the one,
which sucks to him.
Speaker 3 (05:33):
She just goes, should I distance myself or just end it?
Speaker 5 (05:37):
Distance? I don't think I have to end it, but
I wouldn't that bad for her?
Speaker 6 (05:40):
Like? Does she really hate the fact that he's still
on Facebook dating? I hate that?
Speaker 7 (05:43):
Sure?
Speaker 6 (05:44):
Does she know that he's out here dating other people?
Speaker 4 (05:47):
If I'm dating a guy for six months, we're doing sleepovers.
He's introducing me to mommy. Okay, he's telling me I
want you. I want to meet your family so badly.
We're going to get on FaceTime and have a little
with them because we can't see them in person because
they live in another state.
Speaker 3 (06:03):
You can't delete your stupid Facebook profile for me.
Speaker 6 (06:05):
Thirty and you're thirty six months, is a little quick
to be meeting the family. No, it's not.
Speaker 5 (06:09):
That is fine and behind.
Speaker 3 (06:11):
But even if that's the case, he's the one that's
he's the one doing it.
Speaker 6 (06:15):
He sounds like he's loving and.
Speaker 3 (06:16):
You can't take down your Facebook profile. For me that
that's a.
Speaker 5 (06:18):
Little especially when quote unquote, you're not sleeping with anybody else.
Speaker 3 (06:22):
Let's see what everybody else thinks.
Speaker 4 (06:24):
Six one seven, nine three one one nine four five
six one seven nine three one one nine four five
Everything else is perfect, But the person you're seeing for
six months is refusing to date take down their Hi, everybody,
good morning. It's actually in the gym in morning show.
We are doing a DM dilemma right now. If you're
(06:44):
going through something and you need, you know, honest, open
opinions from people who don't know any of the players
in the story that is your life, you can always
DM me at Ashley Feldman two ease on the Ashley
will do our best to help you. I got an
anonymous message today. I'm dating this guy for six months.
It's been going great. So I've met his family, went
to family parties. My family lives out of state, but
(07:05):
they've met him via FaceTime. We met on Facebook dating
and he has shown such continuous effort.
Speaker 3 (07:10):
I know he likes me. I stay over his place
very often.
Speaker 4 (07:13):
We talked about being exclusive with each other, but when
I mentioned taking down the Facebook dating app, he says
he's not ready. He has mentioned that he's scared of
commitment and I'm sorry, I'm all over the place. But basically,
should I be worried that he won't take his profile down?
We asked a couple follow up questions, are you guys
hooking up with anybody else?
Speaker 8 (07:30):
Know?
Speaker 4 (07:31):
What does he say when you ask him to take
down the Facebook profile? She says he's quick to change
the subject and says that he is not ready. Both
twenty nine years old, and she wants to know now
should she distance herself or just end this relationship. Let's
go to Will will Is in Dorchester.
Speaker 7 (07:48):
Hi, Will, how you doing?
Speaker 6 (07:50):
Ashley?
Speaker 3 (07:51):
What's up, bab? What are your thoughts on this? She's listening,
by the way, so be nice.
Speaker 7 (07:55):
My thoughts on this right? I feel like she should
give it more time because, as y'all said, is six
months the exclusive. She obviously goes on the app. You
know what, I'm saying, I feel like a lot of
women stopped being so controlling. God gives us free will.
First of all, the guy's thirty years old, he lived
thirty years of his life, and he's supposed to give
(08:17):
all of this control to a woman after six months?
Speaker 5 (08:20):
Well, fine, not get it?
Speaker 3 (08:22):
Okay?
Speaker 5 (08:22):
Fine?
Speaker 4 (08:23):
So then why say to her we're not talking with
other people right? Why take her to meet mom and dad?
Why take her to family parties? You're putting things in her.
Speaker 7 (08:34):
Let you no, no, see you guys take it as
cleaning with your head. Want to we want to confirm
and let you guys know that we're willing to commit.
Just give us some time. You got to give a
man some time. It takes more time bus to commit
than women.
Speaker 3 (08:50):
Oh my god, I.
Speaker 4 (08:52):
Just think it's I think you're giving unrealistic expectations. There's
no reason for me to meet your family if you're
not sure if you're going to commit to me or not.
And also you're not going to take down your Facebook profile,
but you will expect.
Speaker 3 (09:04):
Me not to hook up with anybody else for what why.
Speaker 7 (09:08):
I'm not saying I expect that that's the reason why
I'm not committing. I'm not committing yet because I don't
know what to expect out of this relationship. It's been
six months.
Speaker 3 (09:17):
What is a good timeframe for Will from Dorchester? When
do we know?
Speaker 4 (09:21):
You're saying six months, Like, that's not a lot of time.
So when when does Will from Dorchester know? How long
does it take?
Speaker 7 (09:27):
I say the time is unknown. You don't know when somebody.
You could be with somebody for five years and they
could cheat on you, like you don't ever know. But
if somebody has giving you all the right signs that
they're not going to do you wrong, they're treating you right,
they're willing to.
Speaker 3 (09:46):
I would argue that.
Speaker 4 (09:47):
I would argue that he's not giving her all the
right signs because he's still keeping up his dating profile.
Speaker 3 (09:52):
That's not a good sign.
Speaker 7 (09:54):
That's one sign. Just saying SI sign.
Speaker 6 (09:58):
That's a big signing.
Speaker 3 (10:00):
That's a but that's a massive thing.
Speaker 7 (10:02):
Her feet and say she got ugly feet, But hey man,
that's one thing.
Speaker 4 (10:09):
Well I'm not dancing with you today. You're part of
the problem.
Speaker 3 (10:12):
But thank you. I appreciate the call. Erica is in Townsend,
High Erica, Hi, how are you so opposite end?
Speaker 4 (10:20):
You're like, as soon as you started dating your I'm
assuming now husband.
Speaker 3 (10:25):
Yes, okay, you guys you met on the apps?
Speaker 4 (10:29):
Yeah, and how did you guys handle the app situation?
Speaker 2 (10:33):
Once we started dating and we basically fell in love
with like right away, we were done with it. We
deleted them. So I think this girl needs to end it.
Speaker 3 (10:42):
Really.
Speaker 2 (10:43):
Yeah, I really think she said, Well.
Speaker 4 (10:45):
Listen, you're not alone, because there's a lot of other
calls saying the same thing. How long were you and
your husband dating at the time before you got rid
of the apps?
Speaker 2 (10:54):
We were talking for a while, I would say two months.
Speaker 3 (10:57):
Two months? Well did you hear that? Months? And we
deleted the apps? Erica, thank you for the call, just saying.
Speaker 4 (11:05):
Melissa is in Dartmouth, Hi, baby, Hello, So you're backing four.
Speaker 3 (11:11):
Ends claim it's only been six months.
Speaker 8 (11:13):
I think this is ridiculous. It's only been months, and
I think that women need to.
Speaker 7 (11:18):
Be smarter than that.
Speaker 8 (11:19):
Sorry, no offense, but men are men, and they're gonna
tell you what they want to tell you to get
what they want.
Speaker 4 (11:25):
The fact that he's taking listen, I'm not I'm not
six months, okay, but I think you can know for
sure in six months if this is someone that you
could see a future with, so I'm sure for her.
She's like, all right, yeah, maybe it's even six months,
but I want a future with this guy. I want
more time with this guy. He's telling me we're not
hooking up with other people. He's introducing me to mom
(11:45):
and dad and taking me to family parties, giving me
all the signs, but then he won't take down his
dating profile.
Speaker 2 (11:52):
Yeah, I get it.
Speaker 8 (11:53):
Guys are guys, but six months is not a lot
of time. You don't know somebody in that amount of time.
Speaker 3 (11:57):
So do you think that she should leave?
Speaker 8 (12:02):
I don't think that she should leave. I just think
she should set realistic expectations. But I'm not trying to
be rude in saying that at all. Like I've been
married for decades and I know how men are. You
have to give them patience and you have to allow
them time. They have to come into themselves. They have
to know that this is what they want, Like, you
have to be realistic about things.
Speaker 3 (12:20):
Six months is nothing, All right, all, thanks for the call.
Speaker 4 (12:24):
It just feels like Melissa's giving, give and giving, and
that's like a lot to give up.
Speaker 3 (12:31):
I don't like that attitude of.
Speaker 4 (12:32):
Like we have to wait for them when they are ready,
like f that she's ready and he's telling her let's
be exclusive.
Speaker 6 (12:39):
From the app, she's happy. Aside from the app, she
is happy. She's treated like a queen. He treats her right.
I mean that in we know, but that's what she's saying.
She's saying he is everything that I wanted a man,
except for the app.
Speaker 5 (12:51):
Well, I know, but also the commitment part, because he's
our committing.
Speaker 6 (12:55):
Okay, but she's more upset about the app and the
fact that he potential could see other people. Aside from that,
she's a happy camp. But with this guy, I just.
Speaker 3 (13:05):
Asked, do you guys fight about anything else? She's bubbling.
Speaker 5 (13:07):
But I also feel like at the end of the day,
if he was really that into her, he get rid of.
Speaker 6 (13:11):
The I hear, I hear, Yeah, they're taking the parents.
I think it's too soon.
Speaker 3 (13:15):
Crazy And yes, it gave us false expectations. That's crazy.
Speaker 6 (13:20):
Yeah, unless he doesn't care about stuff like that and
he takes every girl to me Jeeves's parents, then that's
a different story. But yes, I understand that part where
she's like, Okay, he's taking me to meet the fan.
That must mean that he really really likes me, get it.
Speaker 3 (13:31):
He made a mistake by doing that.
Speaker 4 (13:33):
He made a mistake by telling her we're not hooking
up with any other other people, because again, you're giving us.
Speaker 3 (13:38):
False expectation on the false cord.
Speaker 4 (13:41):
I asked her, and she said, they've only really had
one argument so far in the six months. I'm just saying,
if she's writing me, well, you're listening, you're writing me,
you're asking us about this, you've clearly feel in your
gut that something is off.
Speaker 3 (13:54):
Like it, I mean, let this man, let them, Let
let him go and do his thing.
Speaker 6 (13:58):
Tell him that, tell him I'm gonna I'm going to
back out for a little bit because you don't seem
like you're ready to commit, and I need someone who's
going to give me that commitment. And if you can't
do that for me, then it's cool. And if he
bounces back and says, I, you know what, I don't
want to lose you, maybe you need to apply some
pressure on him on that.
Speaker 4 (14:12):
I think so, because I feel like he's really in
the driver's seat right now, so I think she needs
to kind of bump him a little bit and be like, no,
this is this is what I want.
Speaker 3 (14:20):
This is how we need to do it either way,
keep us proofs what ends up happening. And I see
a couple other GM dilemmas coming in.
Speaker 4 (14:28):
So again, if you're going through something and you need
some advice at Ashley Feldman to ease on the Ashley one.
It's Ashley and the jam In Morning Show with DJ
Foreign and Sautia, and it's.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
Time for another DM dilemma.
Speaker 3 (00:09):
All right, babes. We have a little thing called DM dilemma.
Speaker 4 (00:14):
And you know, I think a lot of times you
might have something going on in your life and everybody
in your circle is just too close to the situation, right,
Like I already have a preconceived notion about Joey the
X that my friend dated, So I'm always going to
feel the type of way about Joey, and then I
won't be able to really give you an unopinionated opinion.
Speaker 5 (00:35):
Yeah, because you always think a bunch of friends.
Speaker 3 (00:37):
Yeah, because I always want to slap Joey.
Speaker 4 (00:39):
So anyways, if you're going through it and you have
a little dilemma in your life and you need somebody
who you know kind of doesn't know anybody in the
situation to give you an.
Speaker 3 (00:49):
Opinion, We're here for you.
Speaker 4 (00:50):
You can always DM me at Ashley Feldman to ease
on the Ashley. You can stay anonymous like our girl
today and you know we'll do our best and everybody else.
Speaker 3 (00:59):
Can you know way in as well.
Speaker 4 (01:02):
Obviously she wants to stay anonymous. She said, I've been
dating this guy for six months. It's been going great.
I've met his family, we went to a family party,
et cetera. My family live is out of state, but
they have met him via FaceTime. We met on Facebook dating,
and he has shown continuous effort and I know he
really likes me. I stay over his place often. We
(01:25):
have talked about even being exclusive with each other. But
when I mentioned him taking down his Facebook dating app,
he says, I'm not ready. He has mentioned that he's
scared of commitment and sorry, I feel like I'm all
over the place. But basically, should I be worried that
he won't take down his dating profile?
Speaker 5 (01:43):
Absolutely, that guy does not want to be in a
relationship though.
Speaker 6 (01:47):
He said, I'm not cool with a commitment. Right.
Speaker 3 (01:50):
He mentioned her that he is scared commitment.
Speaker 5 (01:54):
Which I feel like sometimes. Yeah, it's another way of
him saying he doesn't you know what I mean nothing,
He's really scared of me.
Speaker 6 (01:59):
He's problem here.
Speaker 4 (02:01):
She's kind of saying, everything's been going so well, We've
met each other's families, all these things.
Speaker 3 (02:07):
Is this a major red flag?
Speaker 7 (02:08):
Like?
Speaker 3 (02:09):
Should she dump him?
Speaker 5 (02:10):
Well? She wants more?
Speaker 1 (02:11):
Right, sounds like that I mean, I can now she
wants a relationship with him clearly.
Speaker 6 (02:16):
Boom.
Speaker 1 (02:16):
Yeah, Well, what's the problem he's not committing? Boom, problem solved?
Move on.
Speaker 6 (02:24):
How do you tell you what we want? And then
you come back and be like, oh, well, I think
I can know. He told you he doesn't want to commit.
Why you're sitting here scratching your head wondering what's going on?
You've got your answer. He'd been told you.
Speaker 4 (02:36):
So that's my devil's advocate here. He is everything she
wants in a man and all of the things except
for that.
Speaker 3 (02:45):
Is this like break up worthy?
Speaker 4 (02:47):
Should she cut her her losses here and move on
or should she just keep trying to fight the good
fight and hope that sooner or later he's like, fine,
I will get rid of my Facebook getting it, by
the way, that would make me feel a whole type
of way.
Speaker 6 (02:59):
Honestly, got to weigh the pros and the corns. Are
you okay with him still? You know, wanting to be
out here because they're not exclusive. Obviously they've talked about
being together, but they're not together, right, That's how I'm assuming,
like they've he's met the family. They kind of.
Speaker 3 (03:13):
Thought about her, Are you hooking up with other people?
Speaker 6 (03:16):
I'm sure she's not, but he is.
Speaker 5 (03:19):
That seems pretty clear. I think that's what he likes
about this.
Speaker 6 (03:21):
But it sounds to me like he's being honest with
her and tell him that, Like, look like what dating?
We're cool?
Speaker 4 (03:25):
We vi She said that she's by the way, she's
live texting me as we speak. She are dming. She said,
they are both both exclusive, not hooking up with the people.
But you know what, it would make me feel like
he's just on there waiting to see if something better comes.
Speaker 3 (03:40):
Yeah, that would hurt my heart.
Speaker 5 (03:42):
Yeah, hurt exclusive. What's the difference in being in a relationship? Nothing?
Speaker 4 (03:46):
Nothing, And this is just going She can say all
she wants that she's not worried about it.
Speaker 3 (03:51):
He can have that. This is going to eat her alive. Yeah,
but is it worth breaking up over?
Speaker 5 (03:55):
They've only because she wants something specific and he doesn't
down the line there exactly. This is the way around.
Speaker 6 (04:02):
If she really believes that in what she wants is
a relationship and a man, a husband or whatever, and
this guy is not offering that, why you here, move on?
Speaker 4 (04:12):
I'm saying to her, what exactly does he say when
you ask him to take down profile.
Speaker 6 (04:18):
Because I'll tell you what, as long as he knows
that this is what you want, and you're still I guess,
not allowing him, but he still knows that he could
be on this dating site and you're kind of like
succumbing to that. He's going to continue doing his own thing.
Speaker 3 (04:30):
Yeah, he's going to tell you got to put Yeah, you.
Speaker 6 (04:32):
Got to put your foot down and tell him, hey,
listen me and you vibe. And that's the only contention
that I have with you is Facebook.
Speaker 4 (04:38):
Dating, honestly, And all my friends are going through this,
and I just want to I just want to slap
guys sometimes because why would you not take down the
stupid profile? But you want to meet her parents, you're
introducing her to your family, you're doing sleepovers every night.
Speaker 3 (04:53):
Why is potential all that effort and then not take
down the dating part?
Speaker 1 (04:57):
Because this potential or this potential and these options in
this convenience.
Speaker 4 (05:01):
I said, what exactly does he say when you say
you need to take down the profile? He's very quick
to change the subject and says he's not ready.
Speaker 6 (05:07):
How old are there?
Speaker 5 (05:08):
That's a good question. It sounds like he's going yeah,
but you know what, I want to be shocked if
they were on the late twenties and too.
Speaker 6 (05:14):
That's what I'm thinking her broken twenties or thirties, early
thirties of late twenties, he'd better be young.
Speaker 3 (05:20):
They're both twenty nine.
Speaker 5 (05:21):
Yes, he's a girl, please, that's just playing games he's starting.
Speaker 6 (05:26):
It's just he's not going to think about settling until
his mid to late thirties.
Speaker 5 (05:30):
Orange he finds the one and maybe she's not the one,
which sucks to him.
Speaker 3 (05:33):
She just goes, should I distance myself or just end it?
Speaker 5 (05:37):
Distance? I don't think I have to end it, but
I wouldn't that bad for her?
Speaker 6 (05:40):
Like? Does she really hate the fact that he's still
on Facebook dating? I hate that?
Speaker 7 (05:43):
Sure?
Speaker 6 (05:44):
Does she know that he's out here dating other people?
Speaker 4 (05:47):
If I'm dating a guy for six months, we're doing sleepovers.
He's introducing me to mommy. Okay, he's telling me I
want you. I want to meet your family so badly.
We're going to get on FaceTime and have a little
with them because we can't see them in person because
they live in another state.
Speaker 3 (06:03):
You can't delete your stupid Facebook profile for me.
Speaker 6 (06:05):
Thirty and you're thirty six months, is a little quick
to be meeting the family. No, it's not.
Speaker 5 (06:09):
That is fine and behind.
Speaker 3 (06:11):
But even if that's the case, he's the one that's
he's the one doing it.
Speaker 6 (06:15):
He sounds like he's loving and.
Speaker 3 (06:16):
You can't take down your Facebook profile. For me that
that's a.
Speaker 5 (06:18):
Little especially when quote unquote, you're not sleeping with anybody else.
Speaker 3 (06:22):
Let's see what everybody else thinks.
Speaker 4 (06:24):
Six one seven, nine three one one nine four five
six one seven nine three one one nine four five
Everything else is perfect, But the person you're seeing for
six months is refusing to date take down their Hi, everybody,
good morning. It's actually in the gym in morning show.
We are doing a DM dilemma right now. If you're
(06:44):
going through something and you need, you know, honest, open
opinions from people who don't know any of the players
in the story that is your life, you can always
DM me at Ashley Feldman two ease on the Ashley
will do our best to help you. I got an
anonymous message today. I'm dating this guy for six months.
It's been going great. So I've met his family, went
to family parties. My family lives out of state, but
(07:05):
they've met him via FaceTime. We met on Facebook dating
and he has shown such continuous effort.
Speaker 3 (07:10):
I know he likes me. I stay over his place
very often.
Speaker 4 (07:13):
We talked about being exclusive with each other, but when
I mentioned taking down the Facebook dating app, he says
he's not ready. He has mentioned that he's scared of
commitment and I'm sorry, I'm all over the place. But basically,
should I be worried that he won't take his profile down?
We asked a couple follow up questions, are you guys
hooking up with anybody else?
Speaker 8 (07:30):
Know?
Speaker 4 (07:31):
What does he say when you ask him to take
down the Facebook profile? She says he's quick to change
the subject and says that he is not ready. Both
twenty nine years old, and she wants to know now
should she distance herself or just end this relationship. Let's
go to Will will Is in Dorchester.
Speaker 7 (07:48):
Hi, Will, how you doing?
Speaker 6 (07:50):
Ashley?
Speaker 3 (07:51):
What's up, bab? What are your thoughts on this? She's listening,
by the way, so be nice.
Speaker 7 (07:55):
My thoughts on this right? I feel like she should
give it more time because, as y'all said, is six
months the exclusive. She obviously goes on the app. You
know what, I'm saying, I feel like a lot of
women stopped being so controlling. God gives us free will.
First of all, the guy's thirty years old, he lived
thirty years of his life, and he's supposed to give
(08:17):
all of this control to a woman after six months?
Speaker 5 (08:20):
Well, fine, not get it?
Speaker 3 (08:22):
Okay?
Speaker 5 (08:22):
Fine?
Speaker 4 (08:23):
So then why say to her we're not talking with
other people right? Why take her to meet mom and dad?
Why take her to family parties? You're putting things in her.
Speaker 7 (08:34):
Let you no, no, see you guys take it as
cleaning with your head. Want to we want to confirm
and let you guys know that we're willing to commit.
Just give us some time. You got to give a
man some time. It takes more time bus to commit
than women.
Speaker 3 (08:50):
Oh my god, I.
Speaker 4 (08:52):
Just think it's I think you're giving unrealistic expectations. There's
no reason for me to meet your family if you're
not sure if you're going to commit to me or not.
And also you're not going to take down your Facebook profile,
but you will expect.
Speaker 3 (09:04):
Me not to hook up with anybody else for what why.
Speaker 7 (09:08):
I'm not saying I expect that that's the reason why
I'm not committing. I'm not committing yet because I don't
know what to expect out of this relationship. It's been
six months.
Speaker 3 (09:17):
What is a good timeframe for Will from Dorchester? When
do we know?
Speaker 4 (09:21):
You're saying six months, Like, that's not a lot of time.
So when when does Will from Dorchester know? How long
does it take?
Speaker 7 (09:27):
I say the time is unknown. You don't know when somebody.
You could be with somebody for five years and they
could cheat on you, like you don't ever know. But
if somebody has giving you all the right signs that
they're not going to do you wrong, they're treating you right,
they're willing to.
Speaker 3 (09:46):
I would argue that.
Speaker 4 (09:47):
I would argue that he's not giving her all the
right signs because he's still keeping up his dating profile.
Speaker 3 (09:52):
That's not a good sign.
Speaker 7 (09:54):
That's one sign. Just saying SI sign.
Speaker 6 (09:58):
That's a big signing.
Speaker 3 (10:00):
That's a but that's a massive thing.
Speaker 7 (10:02):
Her feet and say she got ugly feet, But hey man,
that's one thing.
Speaker 4 (10:09):
Well I'm not dancing with you today. You're part of
the problem.
Speaker 3 (10:12):
But thank you. I appreciate the call. Erica is in Townsend,
High Erica, Hi, how are you so opposite end?
Speaker 4 (10:20):
You're like, as soon as you started dating your I'm
assuming now husband.
Speaker 3 (10:25):
Yes, okay, you guys you met on the apps?
Speaker 4 (10:29):
Yeah, and how did you guys handle the app situation?
Speaker 2 (10:33):
Once we started dating and we basically fell in love
with like right away, we were done with it. We
deleted them. So I think this girl needs to end it.
Speaker 3 (10:42):
Really.
Speaker 2 (10:43):
Yeah, I really think she said, Well.
Speaker 4 (10:45):
Listen, you're not alone, because there's a lot of other
calls saying the same thing. How long were you and
your husband dating at the time before you got rid
of the apps?
Speaker 2 (10:54):
We were talking for a while, I would say two months.
Speaker 3 (10:57):
Two months? Well did you hear that? Months? And we
deleted the apps? Erica, thank you for the call, just saying.
Speaker 4 (11:05):
Melissa is in Dartmouth, Hi, baby, Hello, So you're backing four.
Speaker 3 (11:11):
Ends claim it's only been six months.
Speaker 8 (11:13):
I think this is ridiculous. It's only been months, and
I think that women need to.
Speaker 7 (11:18):
Be smarter than that.
Speaker 8 (11:19):
Sorry, no offense, but men are men, and they're gonna
tell you what they want to tell you to get
what they want.
Speaker 4 (11:25):
The fact that he's taking listen, I'm not I'm not
six months, okay, but I think you can know for
sure in six months if this is someone that you
could see a future with, so I'm sure for her.
She's like, all right, yeah, maybe it's even six months,
but I want a future with this guy. I want
more time with this guy. He's telling me we're not
hooking up with other people. He's introducing me to mom
(11:45):
and dad and taking me to family parties, giving me
all the signs, but then he won't take down his
dating profile.
Speaker 2 (11:52):
Yeah, I get it.
Speaker 8 (11:53):
Guys are guys, but six months is not a lot
of time. You don't know somebody in that amount of time.
Speaker 3 (11:57):
So do you think that she should leave?
Speaker 8 (12:02):
I don't think that she should leave. I just think
she should set realistic expectations. But I'm not trying to
be rude in saying that at all. Like I've been
married for decades and I know how men are. You
have to give them patience and you have to allow
them time. They have to come into themselves. They have
to know that this is what they want, Like, you
have to be realistic about things.
Speaker 3 (12:20):
Six months is nothing, All right, all, thanks for the call.
Speaker 4 (12:24):
It just feels like Melissa's giving, give and giving, and
that's like a lot to give up.
Speaker 3 (12:31):
I don't like that attitude of.
Speaker 4 (12:32):
Like we have to wait for them when they are ready,
like f that she's ready and he's telling her let's
be exclusive.
Speaker 6 (12:39):
From the app, she's happy. Aside from the app, she
is happy. She's treated like a queen. He treats her right.
I mean that in we know, but that's what she's saying.
She's saying he is everything that I wanted a man,
except for the app.
Speaker 5 (12:51):
Well, I know, but also the commitment part, because he's
our committing.
Speaker 6 (12:55):
Okay, but she's more upset about the app and the
fact that he potential could see other people. Aside from that,
she's a happy camp. But with this guy, I just.
Speaker 3 (13:05):
Asked, do you guys fight about anything else? She's bubbling.
Speaker 5 (13:07):
But I also feel like at the end of the day,
if he was really that into her, he get rid of.
Speaker 6 (13:11):
The I hear, I hear, Yeah, they're taking the parents.
I think it's too soon.
Speaker 3 (13:15):
Crazy And yes, it gave us false expectations. That's crazy.
Speaker 6 (13:20):
Yeah, unless he doesn't care about stuff like that and
he takes every girl to me Jeeves's parents, then that's
a different story. But yes, I understand that part where
she's like, Okay, he's taking me to meet the fan.
That must mean that he really really likes me, get it.
Speaker 3 (13:31):
He made a mistake by doing that.
Speaker 4 (13:33):
He made a mistake by telling her we're not hooking
up with any other other people, because again, you're giving us.
Speaker 3 (13:38):
False expectation on the false cord.
Speaker 4 (13:41):
I asked her, and she said, they've only really had
one argument so far in the six months. I'm just saying,
if she's writing me, well, you're listening, you're writing me,
you're asking us about this, you've clearly feel in your
gut that something is off.
Speaker 3 (13:54):
Like it, I mean, let this man, let them, Let
let him go and do his thing.
Speaker 6 (13:58):
Tell him that, tell him I'm gonna I'm going to
back out for a little bit because you don't seem
like you're ready to commit, and I need someone who's
going to give me that commitment. And if you can't
do that for me, then it's cool. And if he
bounces back and says, I, you know what, I don't
want to lose you, maybe you need to apply some
pressure on him on that.
Speaker 4 (14:12):
I think so, because I feel like he's really in
the driver's seat right now, so I think she needs
to kind of bump him a little bit and be like, no,
this is this is what I want.
Speaker 3 (14:20):
This is how we need to do it either way,
keep us proofs what ends up happening. And I see
a couple other GM dilemmas coming in.
Speaker 4 (14:28):
So again, if you're going through something and you need
some advice at Ashley Feldman to ease on the Ashley one.
Popular Podcasts
Crime Junkie
Does hearing about a true crime case always leave you scouring the internet for the truth behind the story? Dive into your next mystery with Crime Junkie. Every Monday, join your host Ashley Flowers as she unravels all the details of infamous and underreported true crime cases with her best friend Brit Prawat. From cold cases to missing persons and heroes in our community who seek justice, Crime Junkie is your destination for theories and stories you won’t hear anywhere else. Whether you're a seasoned true crime enthusiast or new to the genre, you'll find yourself on the edge of your seat awaiting a new episode every Monday. If you can never get enough true crime... Congratulations, you’ve found your people. Follow to join a community of Crime Junkies! Crime Junkie is presented by audiochuck Media Company.
24/7 News: The Latest
The latest news in 4 minutes updated every hour, every day.
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.