December 24, 2025 • 43 mins
Lots of listener advice needed with one wondering if she needs to spill some tea to a wife and another wanting to know how old is too old to live at home.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
It's Ashley and Morning Show and it's time for another
DM dilemma.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
Hi, everybody, I'd say this a lot.
Speaker 3 (00:11):
I probably not often enough, but I think when you're
going through something and everybody in the family is too
close to it, it's hard to get just a honest opinion.
And I mean that in a sense of like my
bestie calls me to tell me something about her ex
like I already had. I already hate her, so now
(00:33):
I can't like remove that from my brain. I hate
all of the things that she's done, so I can't
give you just like a let me just put that
to the side and just pretend that I don't know
all these things and give you my honest opinion, because.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
No, I hate that person.
Speaker 3 (00:44):
So that's why we invented this segment, the DM dilemma,
because I think sometimes you just need to tell people
who have no idea about you, your life, anything you
have going on, don't know the players in the story,
don't know their past, and just like, Okay, this is
I'm hearing it for the first time, and this is
how I think about it. Uh six one seven nine
three one one nine four five That a sixty one
(01:04):
seven nine three one one nine four five. I got
this DM. She's staying anonymous. I tried to get her
to call in, and her quote back to me son
was I can't because I've already been threatened that he
will press charges on me.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
If he knows I'm telling people.
Speaker 4 (01:23):
Yeah, you can't press charges for that, So that's crazy.
Speaker 2 (01:25):
The initial I'll run you through the convo. This was
the initial message. At some point on the show today Ash,
Can you guys.
Speaker 3 (01:31):
Talk about what what you would do if you know
somebody is having Slash had an affair, and whether or
not to tell the woman. I am in the middle
of this and I have no idea what to do,
so of course, you know may bullying.
Speaker 2 (01:41):
Can you call in? And she said I'd rather not.
Speaker 3 (01:43):
He's already threatened me that he'd pressed charges on me
if I tell his wife. Happy to give more details,
but please keep me anonymous.
Speaker 4 (01:51):
Yeah, you can't press charges on somebody for telling like
the wife an affair. That's the craziest thing I've ever heard.
It's also stupid.
Speaker 3 (01:56):
I also haven't read this part because she just responded
because I asked for more. So she said I knew
the guy first, and I met his wife at a
mutual party. We both went through divorces this past year,
but finalizing got delayed for various reasons. I realized, now,
I'm an idiot for believing that we have been dating,
hooking up off and on since we both moved out
of our respective homes.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
I found out last week. They reconciled a while back,
but he was just at my place last.
Speaker 4 (02:22):
Oh my god, it's her, Oh my god.
Speaker 5 (02:23):
That just.
Speaker 4 (02:26):
I thought she was a friend as well. All right.
Speaker 3 (02:33):
I found out because a mutual friend mentioned to me
that they were so happy they were able to work
things out, and I was legit dumbfounded. I immediately reached
out to him. He confirmed and immediately started backtracking, begging
me not to say anything, threatening to bring me down
with him.
Speaker 2 (02:51):
Et cetera, et cetera.
Speaker 3 (02:53):
I want to tell her so she's not trying to
reconcile with this absolute curse word, but I also don't
want of the drama, and having met her, I'm worried
she will now blame me for this mess.
Speaker 4 (03:06):
Oh my god, so they're carving me for mom. They
aren't really friends. They've met each other their acquaintances, they're
not close friends.
Speaker 3 (03:12):
No, now that way know it's her. I'm just going
to quickly read the first part again because I wasn't
even okay. I knew the guy first, and I met
his wife at mutual parties. We both went through divorces
last year, but finalizing his got quote delayed for various reasons.
Now I realize I'm an idiot for believing that. So
here they are, they're thinking they're divorces, they're hooking up.
(03:35):
They're both probably like, oh, we can you know, both
relate to what each other's going through.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
You're going through divorce. I'm going to divorce.
Speaker 3 (03:41):
He was lying and saying his was getting delayed, but
in fact he never got the divorce. He was still married. Yeah,
And she said, we've been dating, hooking up off and
on since we both moved out of our quote respective homes,
and I found out last week. He reconciled a while back,
but he was just at my place this past weekend.
I found out as a mutual friend mentioned to me
that they were so happy that the couple was able
(04:04):
to work things out, And I'm just dumbfounded.
Speaker 4 (04:06):
She doesn't want the drama part of it. So if
that is the actual case, and don't tell the wife
because it's only going to bring chaos. And clearly this
guy is not a good dude. So just cut yourself
loose from this guy and never speak to him again.
Speaker 2 (04:19):
It seems like the only way or reason you would
do it is for the get even. Yeah, you know
what I mean, which I understand hurting. You just went
through a divorce.
Speaker 3 (04:28):
You really thought you probably found someone that you can
can confide in and confess your soul to and all
the things. And now you're pissed because you're hurt and
you want to get even. But is the get even
worth it? Because if you know this woman enough to
know that she's just going to blame you, then you're.
Speaker 2 (04:41):
Going to feel even worse. It's not like you two
are going to have like his first wife's club.
Speaker 4 (04:46):
I don't think anything positive is going to come from this.
That's why I think just cut yourself loose.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
Now.
Speaker 4 (04:50):
I do understand the get even part, And like there's
a part of me that says, call her and tell
her like everything.
Speaker 2 (04:54):
Because then he's getting a pass, like he got the
best of both worlds. He was banging her last weekend.
Speaker 4 (04:59):
I know, I know, I just don't think that this
is the only girl, and I don't think he's gonna stop.
So why haven't put yourself in that whole scenario thing?
Speaker 3 (05:06):
I see both sides too, because now I'm like, look
at him winning, Yeah, like how does he get to
win on this? And that's the get even part, right,
cause damn, he.
Speaker 4 (05:17):
Was probably lying the entire time about the divorce.
Speaker 3 (05:20):
The divorce was a life. Let's just go ahead and
call it what it is. The divorce was a lie,
which we hear a lot of times on this show.
We got together on the you know, promise of he
was going to finalize the divorce and he never dies.
Speaker 4 (05:32):
Now, if you are gonna say something, just drop a
quick line, drop the information. Then again, cut yourself loose
out of everything.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
Let's see what everybody else thinks. Six one seven nine
three one one four five six one seven nine three
one one nine four five. Anonymous is going through divorce.
Speaker 3 (05:48):
She meets a guy also going through a air quotes
divorce and things are going well.
Speaker 2 (05:53):
She's with him last weekend, they're hooking up. She goes
to work and she finds out, oh, he was actually
never getting divorced. That was a lot hi and he
is happy at home with his wife. Does she tell
or does she's not not she's listening. By the way, Hi, everybody,
good morning. It's actually in the jam In Morning show.
That was crazy because we had a DM dilemma. Anonymous
was like, I just don't know whether I should tell
(06:15):
the wife or not.
Speaker 3 (06:17):
I know about like an affair that happened. So here
I am thinking she found out a coworker was having
an affair.
Speaker 2 (06:22):
But oh no, no, no, no, no no, no, she was involved.
She's going through divorce. She meets a guy also going
through a divorce. Hers was finalized, his got air quotes delayed.
Come to find out there was no divorce on the horizon.
Now she wants to know do I tell the wife?
And this is like the age old.
Speaker 3 (06:37):
Question right six one seven nine three one one nine
four five. You're with somebody, you find out they have
another somebody?
Speaker 2 (06:44):
Do you tell or do you not? Lauren is in
Hyde Park? Hi, Lara, good morning, Hello, Hi.
Speaker 3 (06:52):
Al Alicia from Worcester, It says Lauren from Hyde Park.
I don't That's why I don't trust these two. They
all sent me right out. They said me, all right
on up, all right, Alicia?
Speaker 2 (07:02):
Does she tell? Good morning, and she's listening, by the way,
so let's you know, be nice.
Speaker 6 (07:07):
Okay, Yes, I think she absolutely should tell Okay, personally,
I would want to know instead of someone's speaking around. Yeah,
two people already know him and her.
Speaker 3 (07:17):
I absolutely would tell you know, I I so, I
I understand that because I would want to know too.
But she said she's the type of female that she
already knows is going to blame her. So it's like,
does that play a role in it too? Like are
you just wasting your time if you know that this
woman is going to be like.
Speaker 2 (07:31):
Well, you're a home record, it's your fault. I don't know.
Speaker 6 (07:34):
Well, whose it is to know?
Speaker 2 (07:39):
All right? I appreciate that Alicia friends at all, friends
at all.
Speaker 6 (07:44):
She doesn't have to take it.
Speaker 2 (07:45):
Yeah, that's right, I guess anonymous, this is a roll
of the dice. Now I don't know who I'm talking to?
Is this anonymous?
Speaker 7 (07:53):
Hi?
Speaker 8 (07:53):
Hi?
Speaker 3 (07:55):
So yeah, Hi, Sati tells me that you're going through
something similar, so you you know you're in the thick
of it as well, and what's your advice?
Speaker 7 (08:06):
My advice is I'm the wife in this situation. I
had found out that my husband was cheating on me.
He told this woman that he was going through a divorce,
and I tried reaching out to her because I did
find out who she was during my detective Yeah, because
my God's feeling was telling me, and best believe I
(08:27):
found out. So I tried reaching out to her and
she would neglect to talk to me, to tell me
her side of the story. And as a wife, that's
all I wanted to know. And as far as her
not I mean being acquaintances with this woman, I mean
as that, like, if she's gonna blame her, let her
blame her. It's really the husband. And if she wants
to stay with the husband, that comes down to that.
(08:49):
But at least she can get it off her chest.
As a wife, it's like the most betrayal thing.
Speaker 3 (08:54):
And no, I can't even like makes me literally want
to vomit even thinking about even hearing you say that
being on the other end of it, being the wife.
And I'm so sorry that happened to you. Where are
you guys at if you don't mind me asking in
your marriage now?
Speaker 7 (09:08):
So the last time he slept with me, he filed
for divorce the week after.
Speaker 2 (09:13):
Oh and this was after you had caught him.
Speaker 8 (09:17):
Yep.
Speaker 3 (09:18):
So you were willing to kind of like take him
back and work through it, and yet he's still like.
Speaker 7 (09:23):
I wanted to. We've been married a long time together,
ten years, have a child, Like I was willing to
do anything to make your work, and he told me
it was over. It was not, and then he blindsided
me with that. So tell the wife.
Speaker 3 (09:38):
Yeah, I mean, I'm sick to my stomach again for you.
And there's really nowhere else to go after this call.
I mean, you're the wife, You've been through it. Tell
the wife, and I'm misus. Thank you for being so
open about that that, I mean, you know it.
Speaker 2 (09:50):
Even who else are we going to at?
Speaker 4 (09:52):
As the spouse, I would always want to know if
this was happening, right, like what are you?
Speaker 2 (09:58):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (09:59):
But I would feel worse about Like she already feels
terrible about herself right because she's thinks she's hooking up
with this guy. Now she knows that he's married wholy
married to somebody else, And you're already feeling bad. And
then you tell the wife, thinking you're doing the right
thing by letting her know that she's getting played, and
she turns it on you and calls you a home
wrecker or something.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
They're not gonna make you feel any better. In fact,
can make it feel worse.
Speaker 4 (10:22):
So if you're going to go into it like that,
then maybe don't have expectations that just like you said
that you and the other female are going to be
like compadres.
Speaker 2 (10:29):
Actually, maybe there is one more to go to. Is
Charlie a guy.
Speaker 4 (10:32):
Charlie's a guy.
Speaker 3 (10:33):
Let's talk to Charlie like a guy's perspective on this.
Charlie is in Somerset. After you hear from a wife
who's been through it, it's kind of hard to go
anywhere else but guy's perspective on this, Charlie, what are
your thoughts?
Speaker 8 (10:46):
So as a guy's perspective on it, I got to
wash about three years ago, and you know it's all
well with good. That being said, I think both parties
are at faulved. You know, she got divorced, or she
was getting divorced she didn't know for sure, or he
lied to her about him getting divorced. They were hooking up. Listen,
(11:11):
no one's gonna win in this situation. Yeah, because your
losses move on with your life. You know the truth.
No one's gonna win. If you feel like you're gonna
be blamed for something that you initiated yourself and without
knowing for sure what was going on, then why are
you even gonna go down that riage?
Speaker 2 (11:32):
Charlie.
Speaker 3 (11:33):
I think this guy wins if she doesn't tell. I
mean she like I think he wins because he's been
hooking up with two chicks for the for god only
knows how long.
Speaker 8 (11:42):
They're both thinking the totally get it, And I completely
understand your point if you want that, And yeah, I
mean I agree, he definitely won. He got the best
of both worlds. But if you don't want the drama
to come along with that, and you don't want to
look at the one being blamed and everything like that,
and you're kind of on there it's about that, then
why are you even going to initiate saying anything?
Speaker 2 (12:03):
I guess if you're if you're asking the question, she's
clearly teetering both ways on it, right.
Speaker 8 (12:09):
I mean, it's a totally BS situation for both parties.
And you know, he's a threat bag for doing what
he did and now you know, not being truthful and
just you know, forthcoming. But you know that's the world
we live in a lot of people just you know,
they go down that road and they don't they want
to have fun, and she would they can get away
with and obviously that's what he did. But at the
(12:29):
end of the day, you know, just walk away, turn
your back, you know.
Speaker 3 (12:38):
Yeah, I just thank you for the call, and I
just move on with yourself, all right. I just uh,
I just DMed her. She's listening, and I just said,
I hope you're hearing all this. I don't know if
it's helping one way or the other. And she said,
I am listening, thank you.
Speaker 4 (12:50):
No decision on what she's going to do, though, because
I feel like in the moment her emotions are probably
like all over the place.
Speaker 2 (12:58):
All right, Well, she just saw it, I put any thoughts.
Let's see if she bubbles. But yeah, I think I
think I could see both whichever way she chooses. I
get it, like it's you.
Speaker 4 (13:08):
Know, there's two sides of this. As a husband, I
would want to know. But on the other end of things,
I don't want to get involved in somebody's life that
even though I was involved with it, Like, even though
I was involved in something like that, I just don't
want I would cut myself out of the whole thing.
Speaker 3 (13:20):
She's bubbling, she's writing a small novella.
Speaker 2 (13:24):
Here we go.
Speaker 3 (13:25):
This guy has been where my head is at. But
I totally hear the woman as well. She's torn, she's
torn get but I feel like she will keep us
posted on this either way, whichever one. Again, it's like,
choose peace, walk away or whatever, and then if not,
you tell, and who knows, maybe you do catch a
woman who's like, thank you, because here I am like
giving up my life for this man who's treating me
(13:47):
like trash. But yeah, she's like, I'm sorry, I just
don't know what I'm gonna do yet. Well, you know,
we'll be doing waiting, waiting.
Speaker 2 (13:54):
I feel like I'm a.
Speaker 9 (13:54):
Part of sowing showing.
Speaker 1 (13:59):
Sustain's number one one for hip hop jam in ninety
four or five.
Speaker 2 (14:05):
I feel a little embarrassed. Listen.
Speaker 3 (14:10):
I think that in general, Hi, everybody, by the way,
I think everybody has one thing. Sorry, most people, AJ,
wyn't you hop on my kids.
Speaker 4 (14:19):
Most that is very true.
Speaker 2 (14:21):
Most people only have one thing where they're like, whow
absolute red flag like that that you know, that's it.
I can see behind Santy AJ's.
Speaker 3 (14:32):
List of red flags that's there's seventy things on that list,
like literally seventy. But if you could only name one
each one of you, one thing where you're like, that's it,
like absolute red flag.
Speaker 2 (14:44):
See you later. I'm out.
Speaker 4 (14:45):
Mine would have to be a dirty room. And then
one step below that is bad credit score, red flag.
Speaker 2 (14:51):
I know you absolutely hate that he's this credit score ash.
I listen. I know there's seven hundred and fifty thousand
million things, but how can I pick one?
Speaker 9 (15:02):
I mean, the smoking is at the top of my list,
whether you're a cigarette smoker or like a pothead, and.
Speaker 2 (15:08):
It's not for you.
Speaker 10 (15:09):
No.
Speaker 3 (15:10):
Dakota Johnson. We all know Dakota Johnson actress. She dated
Chris Martin for a long time. I was actually sad
when they broke up. Let's say, let's say some Dakota
Johnson films. I mean, the main one that sticks out
to me is Fifty Shades of Gray.
Speaker 4 (15:21):
Yeah. I don't even know if I can name another one.
I know she's been in some other stop, but those
are the Little.
Speaker 2 (15:26):
Spider Lady or something she played.
Speaker 4 (15:29):
She was, Yeah, Madam Webb, Madam Webb, that's right, she was.
But they are most known ones are the fifty shades.
Speaker 3 (15:37):
She was asked what her red flag is in dating,
and she said, quote men who wear flip flops.
Speaker 2 (15:43):
If you meet a man who wears flip flops.
Speaker 4 (15:46):
Run, I agree.
Speaker 3 (15:49):
I feel embarrassed because prior to us moving to Marshfield,
the fireman wasn't wearing flip flops like that, like he ever.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
But then we moved to this coastal beach town and
we wear flip flops now, and I'm not moving it
like he tosses on his flops when we go to
the beach. That's not a red flag for me.
Speaker 4 (16:06):
But you're saying now, you're insinuating that he wears them
like every day, like going down to the mailbox, the trash,
never only to the beach.
Speaker 2 (16:13):
It's like a beach thing.
Speaker 4 (16:14):
Yeah, I understand that, but right now it's not beach season.
Speaker 2 (16:17):
Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, he's not wearing.
Speaker 4 (16:19):
Them, because again, if you're walking to the beach, you're
going to the beach, that's completely fine and acceptable. Yeah,
But if you're walking around the house and going to
like the market and flip flops.
Speaker 2 (16:27):
I don't know if he's gone to the market, but
I think we've gone out maybe in Marshfield, like to
grab a drink or something, and he's I could picture, but.
Speaker 4 (16:35):
You can admit that they're not really like the toughest
thing around, right.
Speaker 2 (16:39):
I don't know, it's not up there. I don't listen.
The man has no style, he has nothing. And that's
but that's not a guy in flip flops. That's not
going to be an ultimate like. I won't date them.
Speaker 9 (16:52):
If I walk I say that with my husband, but
he evolved into that afterwards.
Speaker 2 (16:56):
Yeah he's mister mars.
Speaker 4 (16:58):
But if I walked in there was some bliff flop on,
what would you say to me?
Speaker 2 (17:01):
Well, that's you can't use you no offense. You can't
use yourself as an.
Speaker 9 (17:04):
Example, and don't use my feet, don't but I have
to use someone else, like.
Speaker 4 (17:08):
Use down the hall.
Speaker 2 (17:09):
Come it gives less man, it's like, yeah, you're who
Like somebody comes into an assault and attack me. I
don't want the man the flip flop to protect it.
Speaker 4 (17:19):
I get it.
Speaker 3 (17:19):
I get from old baby, you're dead, like you don't
even make it to me, slip slide die?
Speaker 2 (17:26):
What is my number one?
Speaker 8 (17:28):
Red?
Speaker 4 (17:29):
I feel like the thing with you is the thing.
And then and then that leads into the basketball thing.
If you they can't beat you in basketball.
Speaker 2 (17:36):
At the red flag, yeah, I would have.
Speaker 3 (17:39):
I mean, I've never dated anybody that can't beat me
one on one, and it would be really hard for
me to go.
Speaker 2 (17:44):
To sleep at night knowing that you're like a bitch
boy that couldn't like body me down in the pains.
I don't.
Speaker 4 (17:50):
Okay, fine, but there are Navy seals out there who
can't hit a three, fine, but they can.
Speaker 2 (17:55):
Kill some physic for sure. They should physically be able to.
Speaker 3 (17:58):
I am a big woman, yeah, Like, so they have
to be able to like body me down in the paint.
Speaker 2 (18:05):
And you're not going to beat me in a shooting competition.
No one that I've dated has done that, but you
should be able to beat me one on one. You
should physically be able to do that.
Speaker 4 (18:14):
I know. But like you have to understand that you're
good at basketball Division one athlete good, Like this isn't
just like oh I can shoot my horse, like you're
really good. So it's a tough ask.
Speaker 2 (18:26):
I know.
Speaker 3 (18:27):
But if we're talking red flags, like Dakota Johnson is
flip flops, like okay, that's mine. Yeah, but you're right,
and shout out to the short Kings because but I
like again, five ten, that's my cutoff right there.
Speaker 4 (18:38):
Do you have anything on that level like flip flop
or something like that that's not like basketball, something like
that some would consider minor, not even like.
Speaker 2 (18:46):
Okay, this is a good question. I'm gonna play a song.
Speaker 3 (18:48):
You guys call us with your red flags that are
just like crazy Land, and I will think of a
small little one for myself. Six one seven nine three
one one nine four five six one seven nine three
one one nine four five little red flags that are
weird for you. The Fireman's sisters say, use.
Speaker 2 (19:06):
Us guys that run run.
Speaker 3 (19:12):
Oh my god, Hi everybody, Good morning, It's Ashley and
the Gym. In Morning Show, Dakota Johnson, the actress from
Fifty Shades of Gray.
Speaker 2 (19:18):
And Madam Webb, which by the way, flopped.
Speaker 3 (19:21):
I think I love her though she saw it. She
said that her biggest red flag is a guy that
wears flip flops. She said, if you see a guy
wearing flip flops, run, aj goes, I know something that
is a red flag of yours. And I was like, what,
She's like a man that wears ankle socks absolutely disgusting.
Stop cover up your ankle bone. But guess what, I
look at it every day. I'm having sex with the
(19:43):
man that wears them.
Speaker 2 (19:45):
It's tough.
Speaker 4 (19:45):
Do you want to know something that's worse than both
of those boat shoes?
Speaker 2 (19:49):
Boat shoes hate like the hay dude type of the hay.
Speaker 4 (19:53):
Dudes, But then they transition to the ones that are
like a vineyard vines one.
Speaker 2 (19:57):
Oh, yeah, it's not my vibe.
Speaker 3 (20:00):
Melissa is in Abington. Melissa agrees with aj. Smoking definitely
a red flag?
Speaker 2 (20:05):
What else?
Speaker 11 (20:06):
Yeah, it's so crazy.
Speaker 7 (20:08):
I agree with everything you just said. So smoking in drugs.
Speaker 8 (20:12):
I didn't play basketball in college, but.
Speaker 7 (20:15):
I would play pick up at like a rec center.
And my thing was if I could be doing a sport,
I cannot date you.
Speaker 2 (20:21):
Yeah, dude, who are you protecting? As somebody comes in
with a gun, I gotta jump up. I'm gonna you
can't protect me?
Speaker 7 (20:30):
All right?
Speaker 2 (20:30):
Melissa, thank you.
Speaker 3 (20:31):
By the way, when you say drugs, do you mean
like like.
Speaker 7 (20:34):
Like anything and everything?
Speaker 3 (20:37):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (20:37):
All right, shut up, un let's thank you for the call.
Megan is in graft And Meg, what's your red flag? Hey?
Speaker 6 (20:45):
So mine definitely would be like bad oral hygiene.
Speaker 2 (20:49):
Okay, so like yellow teeth, Maybe brushes with his wife's toothbrush,
maybe doesn't brush at all. Yeah, okay, yeah.
Speaker 10 (20:57):
And by the way, like I'm I'm on a dating
site and I like, if I see yellow teeth, that's
just like I automatically it's like now.
Speaker 3 (21:07):
Ye bye bye, we don't want any butter teeth today, Meg,
I agree.
Speaker 2 (21:13):
Uh. Nicky is in Boston, Nikki, tell everybody your red flag.
Speaker 6 (21:20):
So my biggest red flag for a guy is a
guy that wear bonnets in public.
Speaker 3 (21:25):
I can't like the thought of this is already giving
me tears in my eyes.
Speaker 2 (21:29):
I'm laughing so hard, Like why are you out here
being a nana? Like what are you doing?
Speaker 6 (21:35):
I don't know, but there is nothing masculine about that
at all.
Speaker 7 (21:39):
And that's what I.
Speaker 3 (21:41):
That's all I think of. I mean, listen, do I
wear when I have just blown my hair dried? Do
I toss my bonnet on in the house when I
take a shower? Well yeah, but I'm not leaving the house.
Speaker 2 (21:51):
No.
Speaker 7 (21:51):
I've seen guys out here with their head and I
can't stand.
Speaker 4 (21:55):
That's nuts.
Speaker 2 (21:55):
And I stand with you on that, Nikki. Thank you
for the call. Amy is in Franklin. Aim, tell everybody
what your red flag is.
Speaker 5 (22:03):
Well, I have to agree. I'm five to nine, so
height is definitely one. But right after that, if you
have dirty shoes, period, I don't care what shoes they are.
If they're all dirty and crooked and the tongue is
flopping and they're talking to you, I'm good. We don't
want to thank you.
Speaker 2 (22:17):
Yeah, we don't want to speak. We don't want to
speak to your shoes. We want to ye.
Speaker 5 (22:20):
Dirty shoes is a no go because that just speaks
to me about hygiene.
Speaker 2 (22:24):
Oh interesting, all right, Barrian, Ammy, thank you so much
for the call. I mean, everybody has their thing, right.
Speaker 3 (22:30):
I just think if you are somebody you know, let's
just use AJ for example, like I, you should just
be wide open. You should like the person could have
yellow teeth, bad shoes, their breath smells, they haven't showered
in eight weeks.
Speaker 2 (22:43):
Beggars can't be choosers.
Speaker 4 (22:44):
But some people just are. And it's sad to see.
Speaker 2 (22:47):
Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Speaker 1 (22:51):
Show Good Morning, Bustin's number one for hip hop jam
in ninety four or five.
Speaker 3 (22:59):
Hi, guys, good morning, I got a DM from anonymous,
and I tried to begg her to come on because
I was like, I want to hear more because I
think it's important, you know. I wanted to guess this
poor guy up before we, uh we got to this part.
Speaker 2 (23:10):
But she said no, no, no, no, I'll be listening.
Speaker 3 (23:13):
By the way, if you're going through anything and you
kind of want just an outside opinion, you can always
DM me at Ashley Feldman two e's on the Ashley
so Son. She goes, here's the topic, ash how old
is too old to still be living with your parents?
So of course I write back, give me a little more.
Speaker 2 (23:32):
She says, everything is great, everything is going well, things
are good. But he's thirty, he works full time and
he's still living at home.
Speaker 4 (23:44):
This one's pushing it, like it depends what the situation is,
Like does he want to save money, but he's working
full time, so he should have enough and should want
to be out of the house. So this one is
just over the line for me.
Speaker 3 (23:56):
Do you notice that when guys call in they say
they're single. One of the first like, within my first
five questions, I'm like, where do you live? Yeah, do
you have a car? Because it matters like it does
it matters now listen sign of the times. I think
a lot more people are staying at home because financially
it doesn't make sense for them to live on their
(24:17):
own or whatever they came to be.
Speaker 2 (24:18):
But you can get roommates. You definitely cant get live
the life of having multiple roommates, and you know what
I mean, like get out on your own.
Speaker 4 (24:26):
Like I feel like, if you're in your twenties, then
I can understand totally. You can definitely do it. But
if you're thirty, if it's thirty, you need to be
out of the house to write.
Speaker 2 (24:34):
Hear that too, like are you is he three zero
on the dot? Like what?
Speaker 4 (24:37):
Like I need because I always think of the whole thing. Like,
say you go on a date and things are going well,
you want to bring somebody back to your place. It's
really hard to bring a date back to your parents'
house and you really can't get too comfortable there.
Speaker 2 (24:48):
Never forget.
Speaker 3 (24:49):
While my friend went on a date, guy was like,
do you want to come back to my house? And
mommy and Daddy were sitting in.
Speaker 2 (24:54):
The living room.
Speaker 3 (24:55):
First off balls on his part, but they were just
it was there. He lived with his parents and they
were sitting in the living room when he brought my
friend back. Yeah, who's thirty eight years old.
Speaker 4 (25:05):
And for that poor girl, then what then you go
into his room where you guys you have to stay
confined and then shut in to the bathroom like that.
You can't do it.
Speaker 3 (25:12):
I know, I know, but yeah, it's tough, Like it's
a weird because everybody's financial situation is different.
Speaker 2 (25:21):
You certainly don't want to judge.
Speaker 3 (25:22):
And they're listen, there's levels to this, right, Maybe the
person's home because grandma lives there and they need help
taking care of her. I don't know's there's things right
that you could maybe be like, okay, I could understand.
Speaker 2 (25:33):
But say, this guy is thirty five years old, works
full time and still living with mommy and daddy. Like
I don't. I don't feel good about that.
Speaker 4 (25:39):
I feel like this is a major issue because she's
dming us as like asking you about this, so she
feels uncomfortable about this. And it's more than just the
fact that like he's taking care of anybody. I think
he just can't cut the cord, like get out of
the house.
Speaker 2 (25:53):
Let's see what other people think.
Speaker 3 (25:54):
Let's make him thirty five because she just put in
his thirties and that's tough.
Speaker 2 (25:59):
We don't know, Oh is he thirty on the dot?
Speaker 4 (26:01):
Which makes it worse. He's thirty five, man, this is bad.
Speaker 3 (26:05):
Thirty five years old works full time. Every other part
of him is great, like things are going well. But
he lives at home with mommy and daddy. And if
she's going to spend time with him there, she's gonna
be looking at baby photos of him.
Speaker 4 (26:19):
You're trying to be quiet.
Speaker 2 (26:21):
Six one seven, nine three one one nine four five
six one seven nine three one one nine four five
A Has anybody gone through this? And B thirty five
years old? Come back to my house. Mom's making spaghetti.
I'm good, hilarious six one seven nine three one one
nine four five. You want to join the combo? Uh?
Speaker 3 (26:41):
Anonymous is dating a guy. It's going really, really well.
And you know what, as I say this out loud,
it's been tough in these streets. We hear it on
every Tuesday for beyond this white Maybe this is something
now in this day and age, people are gonna have
to suck up.
Speaker 2 (26:53):
I don't like it.
Speaker 3 (26:54):
But the guy's thirty five years old, works full time
and lives at home with mommy and daddy, and she's like,
I can't handle it.
Speaker 2 (27:02):
It's the one thing that's holding her.
Speaker 4 (27:04):
Back as an adult. You can't stomach that because it's uncomfortable.
Speaker 3 (27:07):
Kinga is in Worcester almost thirty two years old, so
thirty one, almost thirty two, and you still live at
home with your parents as well as your boyfriend. Now,
I think this makes it a little different because you
guys are both in the same situation, don't you.
Speaker 12 (27:24):
Yes, I agree. You know, obviously financial situations are tough,
but I think we also have that European background that
you know, you live with your parents until you know,
kind of that you're married. Not that we're you know,
we don't have to do that. We're over to getting
a house before getting married. But you know, life is
stuff out there, and we both get along with all
of our parents well, and it just makes sense for us.
Speaker 3 (27:47):
I live at home with mom and dad. Okay, I
meet somebody who also lives at home with mom and dad.
I think this is null and void. I don't even
think we have time. We're both going through the same situation.
We probably both say we can't wait for one day
to not live with mom and that. But if one
does and one doesn't, that that's tough.
Speaker 12 (28:06):
Right, yeah, correct, And you know, obviously people's relationships with
their parents are different, the partner relationship is different.
Speaker 6 (28:15):
But I want, I just.
Speaker 12 (28:16):
Want to tell anonymous there's nothing to be ashamed of.
You know, maybe if this guy has no savings and
I don't know, it's really has a bad I don't
even know how to explain it.
Speaker 2 (28:26):
Well, no, listen, no, I know what you're saying.
Speaker 3 (28:27):
Because we had some girl calling. She didn't want to
come on, but she was like, maybe he has a
gambling addiction. But so what you're getting at is like,
if there's something else going on as to why they
have to live at home with mom and dad, then
we might want to dig in.
Speaker 12 (28:38):
Yeah maybe of course, like age like, yeah, they trust me.
I don't want to live at thirty two with my parents.
Speaker 5 (28:43):
Like I want to get out.
Speaker 12 (28:45):
I've been wanting to get out, but just d to
the you know, lifestyles and the world and financial situations.
Speaker 7 (28:51):
It's you know, it is what it is.
Speaker 2 (28:52):
And let me ask you something. Do you guys do
sleepovers at each person's parents house?
Speaker 7 (28:58):
No?
Speaker 8 (28:59):
But with this relationship.
Speaker 12 (29:00):
It's still pretty new. But the fact that we're taking
our relationship serious, like you know, we're probably going to
find a house within a year or something. Okay to
be to be determined, but you know, I'm sure my
mom wouldn't be okay with my mom would be okay
for him to sleep over like that the other day
when he was over.
Speaker 3 (29:17):
Right, all right, Well, best of luck to you guys,
and thank you for this other perspective where she's like,
it's nothing to be ashamed of.
Speaker 2 (29:23):
It's fine.
Speaker 3 (29:23):
By the way, I remember when I first met the
fireman and he started telling me about like some of
his friends and stuff and oh, they might meet.
Speaker 2 (29:31):
Us out whatever in Southie.
Speaker 3 (29:34):
Yeah, like a lot of them live at home till
late later.
Speaker 4 (29:42):
Thirties, could be. Yeah, it's like, come on.
Speaker 2 (29:44):
Not everybody, but this happens like it's not it does? Uh?
Jess is in framing Uh not to be confused with
framing him. I don't know, Hi, Jess, how are.
Speaker 5 (29:57):
You all right?
Speaker 2 (29:58):
So you think this is normal? Talk to me.
Speaker 10 (30:00):
This is normal, and I'll tell you why. I am
of an Asian gal it is very cultural to live
with their parents. So I recently got engaged. My fiance
have been you know, hermon and I haven't lived with
my parents in the past four years. And when we
are getting married, even when we buy our next house,
they're expected to live with us until we they grew
(30:22):
old to pass away.
Speaker 4 (30:24):
Wyeah, yeah, no way, no way.
Speaker 7 (30:31):
Yeah.
Speaker 10 (30:32):
We've lived together for four years and he actually loves it.
He actually loves it. He's like, it's so easy, I
come home if you don't want to pok moms books already,
Like what else is it?
Speaker 6 (30:41):
Why?
Speaker 2 (30:42):
Why have why go.
Speaker 10 (30:43):
Out and spend so much money on rent, live at
home and get all those lovelieres?
Speaker 2 (30:48):
All right? So wait, but like you have no privacy.
Speaker 10 (30:53):
So we converted our basement into a full studio basically
without the kitchen. So we share a kitchen, but our
basement is basically a full on studio. So they're upstairs
on the second floor. We're all the way downstairs.
Speaker 4 (31:05):
All right.
Speaker 10 (31:05):
That's helping it noisy, if you know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (31:09):
That's what I'm saying.
Speaker 4 (31:10):
That helps.
Speaker 3 (31:11):
But yeah, I guess, listen, if it's a cultural thing,
I can I can get behind it. And I understand
she's not giving me that vibe. Jess it's not like
she's saying he told me, you know what I mean.
She's just saying thirty five years old, he works full
time and he lives at home.
Speaker 2 (31:25):
Like it's I don't I think it'd be different.
Speaker 10 (31:27):
He'll say, you're dating. I will say your dating pool
is definitely shorter because a lot of people don't understand
that culturally. Like I can't go out there say it,
not with my fiance going out there and saying, hey,
by the way, not only are you going to live
with my parents before we're even engaged, but when we
get married, you're expected to do the exact same thing. Oh,
I couldn't very differ.
Speaker 3 (31:48):
I couldn't agree with you more. I would be like,
thank you so much for this drink. I'm out because
like I couldn't do it.
Speaker 2 (31:54):
So, yes, I can see why you're dating. Pool would shrink. Yeah,
like my mother and I. Yes, God, that's I. We'll
call her for anything, my bestie, that's my gal. If
we live together, I would be in jail. Okay, in jail.
Diddy and I together, yeah, murder.
Speaker 10 (32:10):
Well, I get it. There are like times where they're
butt heads or even my parents and I butt heads
on him. And I feel like I'm stuck in the middle.
But I think at the end of the day, it's
like it's cultural as a respect saying like I want
to make sure my parents are set when they get there,
so and he understands that, thankfully. And I found a
partner that'll thing to understand it. But like I said,
it's very difficult finding a person you want to date
(32:31):
for having a selective few that is willing to do
that long term. There are guys that will say, Okay,
I'm fine with it and then realize maybe a couple
of years later we need to move out.
Speaker 6 (32:42):
Yeah, yeah, it's difficult.
Speaker 3 (32:45):
Well listen, it is difficult, and thank you for the
perspective on it. We're getting a lot of different because
obviously I'm getting DMS people being like absolutely not thirty
five full time should be living on his own.
Speaker 2 (32:55):
But there's I can't fight the cultural aspect to it.
But I don't think that's what this is.
Speaker 4 (33:00):
To her point, Culturally, uh, Dominicans, sometimes this will happen.
But I'll also say culturally, most cultures are more more
respectful to boundaries. The White and laws are not respectful
to boundaries. They intrude and that's the issue there.
Speaker 2 (33:14):
Whites don't see boundary. They just like they're like, hey,
I'm here and there's in your bedroom.
Speaker 4 (33:20):
Say morning show, Good morning.
Speaker 1 (33:23):
Boston's number one for hip hop, he am in ninety
four or five.
Speaker 2 (33:29):
Andia's issues.
Speaker 3 (33:30):
We know this about him, and in your head you're
probably running through all of them thinking, what is she
about to talk about? I don't know if people really
have we spoken about the things that you do on
the road. People really know about this.
Speaker 4 (33:44):
We mentioned it one time, like years years ago, so
they don't really know.
Speaker 3 (33:48):
No, santi is he will cut you off and then
he will pretend as if it is your fault. He
has like these tactics that he does when he does
something wrong on the road, So he is at faull
in all of these.
Speaker 2 (34:00):
Stories, you guys, he is at fault, but he tries.
Speaker 3 (34:04):
To put it on the other person as if it's
something that they have done.
Speaker 4 (34:07):
Yeah, so I'll cut somebody off and then they'll always
pull up because you always have to do the thing
of like you want to see what the person looks
looks like right you pull up next to them.
Speaker 2 (34:18):
If I do something wrong, I don't want to look
at them but I don't.
Speaker 4 (34:21):
Want does it to you? You pull up and you turn,
you want to write there, you do it.
Speaker 2 (34:26):
That's true.
Speaker 9 (34:26):
If someone is something bad to me, I'm like, who
did that? So when somebody does that to me, I
can feel them coming up.
Speaker 4 (34:31):
So I always you make like a funny face or
look like like I'll cross my eyes or something like
that to just throw them off and they don't know
what to do. Yesterday, it was my fault again and
the lady pulled up next to me. So what I
did this time? And I have to say this because
I feel like it goes with the story. She was attractive, right,
(34:51):
she was not. So I looked at her and I
pointed at her and I went like that and the
way I held my hand was like kind of like
kind of like kind of limpy, like you know that
center And she followed me for twelve miles. Got off
the exit. I was only able to escape because I
pulled into the home depot parking lot, did a few things,
(35:12):
and then went towards my house because my house is
right off the highway.
Speaker 9 (35:15):
Yeah, she followed me like she didn't come into home depot,
but she did not, but she was following me one
thousand percent. And again I don't think she would have
done anything to me because like physically, like she couldn't.
Speaker 4 (35:24):
She was very small. But at the same time, I
was like, this is a little crazy, Like what did
she think she was going to do? Yesterday? I got
into my head. I'm like, was that I need to
stop doing this because it's one thing to give somebody
the finger. I feel like you can stomach the finger,
but if somebody is able to insult you like that, yeah,
that's a different emotion there.
Speaker 3 (35:42):
You have to understand, though people die from road rage incidents.
I know people are out here killing each other because
of road rage.
Speaker 4 (35:50):
But I didn't think this was road rage. I just
thought it was like augh, you know, and I.
Speaker 2 (35:54):
Thought that that was solved that But none of it
should ever get to that. But it does because people
don't like this stuff. Stop wait, stop risking your life.
Speaker 4 (36:03):
This Back in the day when I used to do
stunting on the radio station and I had these in
my car for something else, but then I kept the
miss in my car. So I used to have little
signs that I would hold up. One would be the finger,
one would say f you, and all these things so
when I would have these things in the car, i'd
be able to pull it up and have a sign
of you. There were a few of my figure with
(36:24):
the other ones like kind of.
Speaker 3 (36:26):
Had I can't we can't even go into a depth
of the things that he'll do in the car, but
like this man will go as as far as like
to drool, like in the front seat, you know what
I mean.
Speaker 2 (36:37):
Like to like someone. He'll cut somebody off and then
that person will pull up next to him so pissed off,
and then they look and it's a it's a man
drooling behind the wheel.
Speaker 4 (36:46):
But if you think about it, right, if you saw that,
what do you do?
Speaker 2 (36:49):
Do?
Speaker 4 (36:49):
You just go? Oh, like I get it.
Speaker 2 (36:51):
Yeah, I'd be like, I'm sorry. I didn't even do
anything wrong.
Speaker 4 (36:53):
I'd be like, I'm sorry, or are you?
Speaker 5 (36:55):
Like?
Speaker 4 (36:55):
What is that person driving? Exactly right? So that's the
whole effect that I'm kind of going for, and it
usually just mitigates the whole conflict. Yeah they didn't.
Speaker 3 (37:05):
No road Ridge is real people, you hear just like
these crazy crazy stories.
Speaker 2 (37:11):
I've been in the car with the fireman. He has
it a couple times.
Speaker 4 (37:15):
I know you told me one story where like there
was almost like an altercation.
Speaker 2 (37:18):
Right.
Speaker 8 (37:18):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (37:18):
So I was driving and we were pulling out of
a liquor store, obviously, and the guy wanted my spot, right,
He wanted me to pull out fast we could get
the spot. So I'm trying to reverse and he's not
backing up enough for me to get out of the spot.
So the fireman like leans out of the window and
like gives him the hand, like, hey, just back up
a little bit, like she's driving him.
Speaker 2 (37:38):
She can't get out, and the guy goes off. He's like, ef,
you let's go, and then he let's go. Bitch.
Speaker 3 (37:48):
Fireman didn't like that, did not like that. So then
he gets out of the car. He yells at him,
gets back in the car. We reverse out. The guy,
instead of.
Speaker 2 (37:57):
Pulling into the spot, speeds ahead of me and cuts
off our car. Whoa, so we can't My hands were
so tight on the wheel because again, you don't know,
you don't know if people are like you just don't
know how mad people are. I mean, he called me a.
Speaker 3 (38:13):
Bitch, Why are you Like, yeah, it was We've had
a few.
Speaker 2 (38:16):
Instances like that.
Speaker 4 (38:16):
I have to say that Massachusetts is probably one of
the worst places where I see it like every morning,
especially with like the fastening stuff. If you're in the
fast lane not going fast and the cars get so
close to you.
Speaker 2 (38:26):
Happened this morning. I understand me too. I got I
get over that. I was going like seventy five. I
wasn't going slow, but the truck got so like within
an inch of me. I got over right away.
Speaker 3 (38:39):
I don't.
Speaker 2 (38:40):
I don't mess around like ya, let me get out
of your way, buddy. Yeah. Cool, but that, Yeah, that
happens a lot.
Speaker 4 (38:45):
And then you hear the stories about people like pulling
guns and like firing, which that's what I'm saying. Yeah,
I understand. But again, like Massachusetts is next level. And
that's one I think if you start to drooling all
this stuff, like oh, like all right, that is fine.
Just pushed a lot.
Speaker 2 (38:57):
You just drewl in your front seat. Maybe save a life.
Six one seven nine three one one nine four five
six one seven nine three one one nine four five.
There is something about the road rage in Massachusetts that's different.
Have you been involved? Hi, everybody, Good morning, It's Acshuley
and the jam In Morning Show.
Speaker 3 (39:15):
It'sat even just telling me a story from years back
of a road rage incident on ninety three where guy
just pulls out a gun and shoots a lady for
cutting out, Like the is crazy out there.
Speaker 4 (39:26):
And now the guy's gonna now he's doing life. So yeah,
it's insane out there. Right.
Speaker 3 (39:30):
There's something about that being in the car for people
that it puts you to a new level of edge.
I mean, listen, when I'm in bumper to number of traffic,
it does like it does something to my soul.
Speaker 2 (39:40):
I'm not myself.
Speaker 4 (39:41):
You also feel like a safety net when you're in
your car, right because you're traveling. You don't think that
somebody can get to you. It's different than if you
pass onody on the street and even little things.
Speaker 2 (39:48):
I mean if if if you and I get to
an intersection to stop signs at the same time and
I wave you to go because it's either marry you
and we could both go at the same time, and
I wave you to go, and you don't give me
the yeah, who are you?
Speaker 6 (40:02):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (40:02):
And why did your mother hate you? Because that's that's
not right I And it's like I think about it
later on in the day, it's like, let let it go.
Riva is in Southbridge, VA. People are mad out there
behind the wheel.
Speaker 5 (40:17):
Yeah, yes they are.
Speaker 13 (40:19):
Oh my goodness. My husband asking all the time, how
do I get myself into these things?
Speaker 2 (40:23):
What happened?
Speaker 11 (40:26):
So I'm driving to work. It's probably like six forty five.
Speaker 13 (40:29):
In the morning, like no one should be that angry
in the morning, and there was an accident.
Speaker 11 (40:33):
So I was like, I'm gonna be laying for work.
Speaker 13 (40:35):
It's it's what it is. So there, I don't know
where the accident is, so I'm.
Speaker 11 (40:40):
Thinking, like I should probably go over, but I was like,
you know what, I'm just gonna wait whatever.
Speaker 13 (40:44):
Next thing, you know, there's this truck driver to my
right hanging.
Speaker 11 (40:48):
Out of his window screaming at me, and I'm like,
oh my gosh, what.
Speaker 12 (40:52):
Is your issue?
Speaker 11 (40:53):
I was like, okay, dude, whatever, Like I'll.
Speaker 13 (40:54):
Go behind you.
Speaker 11 (40:55):
Like it's not that big a deal.
Speaker 10 (40:57):
So I the car.
Speaker 13 (40:59):
Behind him lets me go in. He's hanging out of.
Speaker 11 (41:01):
His window in front of me, screaming at me, and
I'm like, okay, dude, whatever.
Speaker 8 (41:05):
So I flip them off.
Speaker 13 (41:07):
He breaks out and I'm like, oh my goodness. So
I go around him and so his lane is stopped.
The lane that I'm in now goes ahead of him,
so as I'm passing him, I shake out my tongue
in both my middle fingers and I'm like, whatever.
Speaker 5 (41:22):
Dude, so.
Speaker 8 (41:25):
Who told me to do that?
Speaker 13 (41:26):
He got so pissed he ripped his wheel to the
right and tried to knock me off the road.
Speaker 2 (41:30):
Oh my god, this was a scene.
Speaker 11 (41:35):
It was so it just so happened that it happened
in front of like where the accident was.
Speaker 13 (41:40):
So after I was like, oh my gosh, imu die,
I like sped away.
Speaker 2 (41:44):
He didn't follow me.
Speaker 13 (41:45):
So I'm wondering if.
Speaker 11 (41:46):
The police saw what he did and kept him because
it was crazy.
Speaker 3 (41:50):
Yeah, that's a lot, but that listen, this is there's
a zero shock in my eyes because this is what
happens out there in the streets. People act nuts and listen.
I've also been in a culprit by the way, and
reavia thank you for the call of I do something
wrong and the person is like mother efing me and
I'm going.
Speaker 2 (42:07):
I'm sorry, I'll hit my chest like. There are times
where I know it does and it doesn't. Sometimes some
people they don't care because they're that mad. But yes,
I had, but I I'm not the perfect driver. I've
messed up. I'm from New Jersey. We're notorious for being
bad drivers.
Speaker 4 (42:21):
But I think the expectation, at least what people think
is that like, if something like that happens, they don't
take responsibility for it. They give you the F you back,
which causes a whole thing. Just mitigate it.
Speaker 3 (42:30):
Also, can I just say I don't like use the
middle finger. I don't do this.
Speaker 4 (42:36):
I don't.
Speaker 2 (42:37):
I don't even know.
Speaker 3 (42:38):
Like that is so weird to me that people will think,
like I never use middle to be honest. People that
give the middle finger, I'm like, you're the weirdo. Yes,
do that two things in the car. That's the universal
sign for FU. So everybody can can understand that in
the car. But that's also why I had the signs.
Speaker 2 (42:53):
I could just lift up the sign and yeah, Like
if I would much rather hold up a postcard that
said like F you, And I see people.
Speaker 3 (43:00):
Running around giving both middle fingers, I'm like, are you okay?
Speaker 2 (43:03):
Like do you a little sim of t L
It's Ashley and Morning Show and it's time for another
DM dilemma.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
Hi, everybody, I'd say this a lot.
Speaker 3 (00:11):
I probably not often enough, but I think when you're
going through something and everybody in the family is too
close to it, it's hard to get just a honest opinion.
And I mean that in a sense of like my
bestie calls me to tell me something about her ex
like I already had. I already hate her, so now
(00:33):
I can't like remove that from my brain. I hate
all of the things that she's done, so I can't
give you just like a let me just put that
to the side and just pretend that I don't know
all these things and give you my honest opinion, because.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
No, I hate that person.
Speaker 3 (00:44):
So that's why we invented this segment, the DM dilemma,
because I think sometimes you just need to tell people
who have no idea about you, your life, anything you
have going on, don't know the players in the story,
don't know their past, and just like, Okay, this is
I'm hearing it for the first time, and this is
how I think about it. Uh six one seven nine
three one one nine four five That a sixty one
(01:04):
seven nine three one one nine four five. I got
this DM. She's staying anonymous. I tried to get her
to call in, and her quote back to me son
was I can't because I've already been threatened that he
will press charges on me.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
If he knows I'm telling people.
Speaker 4 (01:23):
Yeah, you can't press charges for that, So that's crazy.
Speaker 2 (01:25):
The initial I'll run you through the convo. This was
the initial message. At some point on the show today Ash,
Can you guys.
Speaker 3 (01:31):
Talk about what what you would do if you know
somebody is having Slash had an affair, and whether or
not to tell the woman. I am in the middle
of this and I have no idea what to do,
so of course, you know may bullying.
Speaker 2 (01:41):
Can you call in? And she said I'd rather not.
Speaker 3 (01:43):
He's already threatened me that he'd pressed charges on me
if I tell his wife. Happy to give more details,
but please keep me anonymous.
Speaker 4 (01:51):
Yeah, you can't press charges on somebody for telling like
the wife an affair. That's the craziest thing I've ever heard.
It's also stupid.
Speaker 3 (01:56):
I also haven't read this part because she just responded
because I asked for more. So she said I knew
the guy first, and I met his wife at a
mutual party. We both went through divorces this past year,
but finalizing got delayed for various reasons. I realized, now,
I'm an idiot for believing that we have been dating,
hooking up off and on since we both moved out
of our respective homes.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
I found out last week. They reconciled a while back,
but he was just at my place last.
Speaker 4 (02:22):
Oh my god, it's her, Oh my god.
Speaker 5 (02:23):
That just.
Speaker 4 (02:26):
I thought she was a friend as well. All right.
Speaker 3 (02:33):
I found out because a mutual friend mentioned to me
that they were so happy they were able to work
things out, and I was legit dumbfounded. I immediately reached
out to him. He confirmed and immediately started backtracking, begging
me not to say anything, threatening to bring me down
with him.
Speaker 2 (02:51):
Et cetera, et cetera.
Speaker 3 (02:53):
I want to tell her so she's not trying to
reconcile with this absolute curse word, but I also don't
want of the drama, and having met her, I'm worried
she will now blame me for this mess.
Speaker 4 (03:06):
Oh my god, so they're carving me for mom. They
aren't really friends. They've met each other their acquaintances, they're
not close friends.
Speaker 3 (03:12):
No, now that way know it's her. I'm just going
to quickly read the first part again because I wasn't
even okay. I knew the guy first, and I met
his wife at mutual parties. We both went through divorces
last year, but finalizing his got quote delayed for various reasons.
Now I realize I'm an idiot for believing that. So
here they are, they're thinking they're divorces, they're hooking up.
(03:35):
They're both probably like, oh, we can you know, both
relate to what each other's going through.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
You're going through divorce. I'm going to divorce.
Speaker 3 (03:41):
He was lying and saying his was getting delayed, but
in fact he never got the divorce. He was still married. Yeah,
And she said, we've been dating, hooking up off and
on since we both moved out of our quote respective homes,
and I found out last week. He reconciled a while back,
but he was just at my place this past weekend.
I found out as a mutual friend mentioned to me
that they were so happy that the couple was able
(04:04):
to work things out, And I'm just dumbfounded.
Speaker 4 (04:06):
She doesn't want the drama part of it. So if
that is the actual case, and don't tell the wife
because it's only going to bring chaos. And clearly this
guy is not a good dude. So just cut yourself
loose from this guy and never speak to him again.
Speaker 2 (04:19):
It seems like the only way or reason you would
do it is for the get even. Yeah, you know
what I mean, which I understand hurting. You just went
through a divorce.
Speaker 3 (04:28):
You really thought you probably found someone that you can
can confide in and confess your soul to and all
the things. And now you're pissed because you're hurt and
you want to get even. But is the get even
worth it? Because if you know this woman enough to
know that she's just going to blame you, then you're.
Speaker 2 (04:41):
Going to feel even worse. It's not like you two
are going to have like his first wife's club.
Speaker 4 (04:46):
I don't think anything positive is going to come from this.
That's why I think just cut yourself loose.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
Now.
Speaker 4 (04:50):
I do understand the get even part, And like there's
a part of me that says, call her and tell
her like everything.
Speaker 2 (04:54):
Because then he's getting a pass, like he got the
best of both worlds. He was banging her last weekend.
Speaker 4 (04:59):
I know, I know, I just don't think that this
is the only girl, and I don't think he's gonna stop.
So why haven't put yourself in that whole scenario thing?
Speaker 3 (05:06):
I see both sides too, because now I'm like, look
at him winning, Yeah, like how does he get to
win on this? And that's the get even part, right,
cause damn, he.
Speaker 4 (05:17):
Was probably lying the entire time about the divorce.
Speaker 3 (05:20):
The divorce was a life. Let's just go ahead and
call it what it is. The divorce was a lie,
which we hear a lot of times on this show.
We got together on the you know, promise of he
was going to finalize the divorce and he never dies.
Speaker 4 (05:32):
Now, if you are gonna say something, just drop a
quick line, drop the information. Then again, cut yourself loose
out of everything.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
Let's see what everybody else thinks. Six one seven nine
three one one four five six one seven nine three
one one nine four five. Anonymous is going through divorce.
Speaker 3 (05:48):
She meets a guy also going through a air quotes
divorce and things are going well.
Speaker 2 (05:53):
She's with him last weekend, they're hooking up. She goes
to work and she finds out, oh, he was actually
never getting divorced. That was a lot hi and he
is happy at home with his wife. Does she tell
or does she's not not she's listening. By the way, Hi, everybody,
good morning. It's actually in the jam In Morning show.
That was crazy because we had a DM dilemma. Anonymous
was like, I just don't know whether I should tell
(06:15):
the wife or not.
Speaker 3 (06:17):
I know about like an affair that happened. So here
I am thinking she found out a coworker was having
an affair.
Speaker 2 (06:22):
But oh no, no, no, no, no no, no, she was involved.
She's going through divorce. She meets a guy also going
through a divorce. Hers was finalized, his got air quotes delayed.
Come to find out there was no divorce on the horizon.
Now she wants to know do I tell the wife?
And this is like the age old.
Speaker 3 (06:37):
Question right six one seven nine three one one nine
four five. You're with somebody, you find out they have
another somebody?
Speaker 2 (06:44):
Do you tell or do you not? Lauren is in
Hyde Park? Hi, Lara, good morning, Hello, Hi.
Speaker 3 (06:52):
Al Alicia from Worcester, It says Lauren from Hyde Park.
I don't That's why I don't trust these two. They
all sent me right out. They said me, all right
on up, all right, Alicia?
Speaker 2 (07:02):
Does she tell? Good morning, and she's listening, by the way,
so let's you know, be nice.
Speaker 6 (07:07):
Okay, Yes, I think she absolutely should tell Okay, personally,
I would want to know instead of someone's speaking around. Yeah,
two people already know him and her.
Speaker 3 (07:17):
I absolutely would tell you know, I I so, I
I understand that because I would want to know too.
But she said she's the type of female that she
already knows is going to blame her. So it's like,
does that play a role in it too? Like are
you just wasting your time if you know that this
woman is going to be like.
Speaker 2 (07:31):
Well, you're a home record, it's your fault. I don't know.
Speaker 6 (07:34):
Well, whose it is to know?
Speaker 2 (07:39):
All right? I appreciate that Alicia friends at all, friends
at all.
Speaker 6 (07:44):
She doesn't have to take it.
Speaker 2 (07:45):
Yeah, that's right, I guess anonymous, this is a roll
of the dice. Now I don't know who I'm talking to?
Is this anonymous?
Speaker 7 (07:53):
Hi?
Speaker 8 (07:53):
Hi?
Speaker 3 (07:55):
So yeah, Hi, Sati tells me that you're going through
something similar, so you you know you're in the thick
of it as well, and what's your advice?
Speaker 7 (08:06):
My advice is I'm the wife in this situation. I
had found out that my husband was cheating on me.
He told this woman that he was going through a divorce,
and I tried reaching out to her because I did
find out who she was during my detective Yeah, because
my God's feeling was telling me, and best believe I
(08:27):
found out. So I tried reaching out to her and
she would neglect to talk to me, to tell me
her side of the story. And as a wife, that's
all I wanted to know. And as far as her
not I mean being acquaintances with this woman, I mean
as that, like, if she's gonna blame her, let her
blame her. It's really the husband. And if she wants
to stay with the husband, that comes down to that.
(08:49):
But at least she can get it off her chest.
As a wife, it's like the most betrayal thing.
Speaker 3 (08:54):
And no, I can't even like makes me literally want
to vomit even thinking about even hearing you say that
being on the other end of it, being the wife.
And I'm so sorry that happened to you. Where are
you guys at if you don't mind me asking in
your marriage now?
Speaker 7 (09:08):
So the last time he slept with me, he filed
for divorce the week after.
Speaker 2 (09:13):
Oh and this was after you had caught him.
Speaker 8 (09:17):
Yep.
Speaker 3 (09:18):
So you were willing to kind of like take him
back and work through it, and yet he's still like.
Speaker 7 (09:23):
I wanted to. We've been married a long time together,
ten years, have a child, Like I was willing to
do anything to make your work, and he told me
it was over. It was not, and then he blindsided
me with that. So tell the wife.
Speaker 3 (09:38):
Yeah, I mean, I'm sick to my stomach again for you.
And there's really nowhere else to go after this call.
I mean, you're the wife, You've been through it. Tell
the wife, and I'm misus. Thank you for being so
open about that that, I mean, you know it.
Speaker 2 (09:50):
Even who else are we going to at?
Speaker 4 (09:52):
As the spouse, I would always want to know if
this was happening, right, like what are you?
Speaker 2 (09:58):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (09:59):
But I would feel worse about Like she already feels
terrible about herself right because she's thinks she's hooking up
with this guy. Now she knows that he's married wholy
married to somebody else, And you're already feeling bad. And
then you tell the wife, thinking you're doing the right
thing by letting her know that she's getting played, and
she turns it on you and calls you a home
wrecker or something.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
They're not gonna make you feel any better. In fact,
can make it feel worse.
Speaker 4 (10:22):
So if you're going to go into it like that,
then maybe don't have expectations that just like you said
that you and the other female are going to be
like compadres.
Speaker 2 (10:29):
Actually, maybe there is one more to go to. Is
Charlie a guy.
Speaker 4 (10:32):
Charlie's a guy.
Speaker 3 (10:33):
Let's talk to Charlie like a guy's perspective on this.
Charlie is in Somerset. After you hear from a wife
who's been through it, it's kind of hard to go
anywhere else but guy's perspective on this, Charlie, what are
your thoughts?
Speaker 8 (10:46):
So as a guy's perspective on it, I got to
wash about three years ago, and you know it's all
well with good. That being said, I think both parties
are at faulved. You know, she got divorced, or she
was getting divorced she didn't know for sure, or he
lied to her about him getting divorced. They were hooking up. Listen,
(11:11):
no one's gonna win in this situation. Yeah, because your
losses move on with your life. You know the truth.
No one's gonna win. If you feel like you're gonna
be blamed for something that you initiated yourself and without
knowing for sure what was going on, then why are
you even gonna go down that riage?
Speaker 2 (11:32):
Charlie.
Speaker 3 (11:33):
I think this guy wins if she doesn't tell. I
mean she like I think he wins because he's been
hooking up with two chicks for the for god only
knows how long.
Speaker 8 (11:42):
They're both thinking the totally get it, And I completely
understand your point if you want that, And yeah, I
mean I agree, he definitely won. He got the best
of both worlds. But if you don't want the drama
to come along with that, and you don't want to
look at the one being blamed and everything like that,
and you're kind of on there it's about that, then
why are you even going to initiate saying anything?
Speaker 2 (12:03):
I guess if you're if you're asking the question, she's
clearly teetering both ways on it, right.
Speaker 8 (12:09):
I mean, it's a totally BS situation for both parties.
And you know, he's a threat bag for doing what
he did and now you know, not being truthful and
just you know, forthcoming. But you know that's the world
we live in a lot of people just you know,
they go down that road and they don't they want
to have fun, and she would they can get away
with and obviously that's what he did. But at the
(12:29):
end of the day, you know, just walk away, turn
your back, you know.
Speaker 3 (12:38):
Yeah, I just thank you for the call, and I
just move on with yourself, all right. I just uh,
I just DMed her. She's listening, and I just said,
I hope you're hearing all this. I don't know if
it's helping one way or the other. And she said,
I am listening, thank you.
Speaker 4 (12:50):
No decision on what she's going to do, though, because
I feel like in the moment her emotions are probably
like all over the place.
Speaker 2 (12:58):
All right, Well, she just saw it, I put any thoughts.
Let's see if she bubbles. But yeah, I think I
think I could see both whichever way she chooses. I
get it, like it's you.
Speaker 4 (13:08):
Know, there's two sides of this. As a husband, I
would want to know. But on the other end of things,
I don't want to get involved in somebody's life that
even though I was involved with it, Like, even though
I was involved in something like that, I just don't
want I would cut myself out of the whole thing.
Speaker 3 (13:20):
She's bubbling, she's writing a small novella.
Speaker 2 (13:24):
Here we go.
Speaker 3 (13:25):
This guy has been where my head is at. But
I totally hear the woman as well. She's torn, she's
torn get but I feel like she will keep us
posted on this either way, whichever one. Again, it's like,
choose peace, walk away or whatever, and then if not,
you tell, and who knows, maybe you do catch a
woman who's like, thank you, because here I am like
giving up my life for this man who's treating me
(13:47):
like trash. But yeah, she's like, I'm sorry, I just
don't know what I'm gonna do yet. Well, you know,
we'll be doing waiting, waiting.
Speaker 2 (13:54):
I feel like I'm a.
Speaker 9 (13:54):
Part of sowing showing.
Speaker 1 (13:59):
Sustain's number one one for hip hop jam in ninety
four or five.
Speaker 2 (14:05):
I feel a little embarrassed. Listen.
Speaker 3 (14:10):
I think that in general, Hi, everybody, by the way,
I think everybody has one thing. Sorry, most people, AJ,
wyn't you hop on my kids.
Speaker 4 (14:19):
Most that is very true.
Speaker 2 (14:21):
Most people only have one thing where they're like, whow
absolute red flag like that that you know, that's it.
I can see behind Santy AJ's.
Speaker 3 (14:32):
List of red flags that's there's seventy things on that list,
like literally seventy. But if you could only name one
each one of you, one thing where you're like, that's it,
like absolute red flag.
Speaker 2 (14:44):
See you later. I'm out.
Speaker 4 (14:45):
Mine would have to be a dirty room. And then
one step below that is bad credit score, red flag.
Speaker 2 (14:51):
I know you absolutely hate that he's this credit score ash.
I listen. I know there's seven hundred and fifty thousand
million things, but how can I pick one?
Speaker 9 (15:02):
I mean, the smoking is at the top of my list,
whether you're a cigarette smoker or like a pothead, and.
Speaker 2 (15:08):
It's not for you.
Speaker 10 (15:09):
No.
Speaker 3 (15:10):
Dakota Johnson. We all know Dakota Johnson actress. She dated
Chris Martin for a long time. I was actually sad
when they broke up. Let's say, let's say some Dakota
Johnson films. I mean, the main one that sticks out
to me is Fifty Shades of Gray.
Speaker 4 (15:21):
Yeah. I don't even know if I can name another one.
I know she's been in some other stop, but those
are the Little.
Speaker 2 (15:26):
Spider Lady or something she played.
Speaker 4 (15:29):
She was, Yeah, Madam Webb, Madam Webb, that's right, she was.
But they are most known ones are the fifty shades.
Speaker 3 (15:37):
She was asked what her red flag is in dating,
and she said, quote men who wear flip flops.
Speaker 2 (15:43):
If you meet a man who wears flip flops.
Speaker 4 (15:46):
Run, I agree.
Speaker 3 (15:49):
I feel embarrassed because prior to us moving to Marshfield,
the fireman wasn't wearing flip flops like that, like he ever.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
But then we moved to this coastal beach town and
we wear flip flops now, and I'm not moving it
like he tosses on his flops when we go to
the beach. That's not a red flag for me.
Speaker 4 (16:06):
But you're saying now, you're insinuating that he wears them
like every day, like going down to the mailbox, the trash,
never only to the beach.
Speaker 2 (16:13):
It's like a beach thing.
Speaker 4 (16:14):
Yeah, I understand that, but right now it's not beach season.
Speaker 2 (16:17):
Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, he's not wearing.
Speaker 4 (16:19):
Them, because again, if you're walking to the beach, you're
going to the beach, that's completely fine and acceptable. Yeah,
But if you're walking around the house and going to
like the market and flip flops.
Speaker 2 (16:27):
I don't know if he's gone to the market, but
I think we've gone out maybe in Marshfield, like to
grab a drink or something, and he's I could picture, but.
Speaker 4 (16:35):
You can admit that they're not really like the toughest
thing around, right.
Speaker 2 (16:39):
I don't know, it's not up there. I don't listen.
The man has no style, he has nothing. And that's
but that's not a guy in flip flops. That's not
going to be an ultimate like. I won't date them.
Speaker 9 (16:52):
If I walk I say that with my husband, but
he evolved into that afterwards.
Speaker 2 (16:56):
Yeah he's mister mars.
Speaker 4 (16:58):
But if I walked in there was some bliff flop on,
what would you say to me?
Speaker 2 (17:01):
Well, that's you can't use you no offense. You can't
use yourself as an.
Speaker 9 (17:04):
Example, and don't use my feet, don't but I have
to use someone else, like.
Speaker 4 (17:08):
Use down the hall.
Speaker 2 (17:09):
Come it gives less man, it's like, yeah, you're who
Like somebody comes into an assault and attack me. I
don't want the man the flip flop to protect it.
Speaker 4 (17:19):
I get it.
Speaker 3 (17:19):
I get from old baby, you're dead, like you don't
even make it to me, slip slide die?
Speaker 2 (17:26):
What is my number one?
Speaker 8 (17:28):
Red?
Speaker 4 (17:29):
I feel like the thing with you is the thing.
And then and then that leads into the basketball thing.
If you they can't beat you in basketball.
Speaker 2 (17:36):
At the red flag, yeah, I would have.
Speaker 3 (17:39):
I mean, I've never dated anybody that can't beat me
one on one, and it would be really hard for
me to go.
Speaker 2 (17:44):
To sleep at night knowing that you're like a bitch
boy that couldn't like body me down in the pains.
I don't.
Speaker 4 (17:50):
Okay, fine, but there are Navy seals out there who
can't hit a three, fine, but they can.
Speaker 2 (17:55):
Kill some physic for sure. They should physically be able to.
Speaker 3 (17:58):
I am a big woman, yeah, Like, so they have
to be able to like body me down in the paint.
Speaker 2 (18:05):
And you're not going to beat me in a shooting competition.
No one that I've dated has done that, but you
should be able to beat me one on one. You
should physically be able to do that.
Speaker 4 (18:14):
I know. But like you have to understand that you're
good at basketball Division one athlete good, Like this isn't
just like oh I can shoot my horse, like you're
really good. So it's a tough ask.
Speaker 2 (18:26):
I know.
Speaker 3 (18:27):
But if we're talking red flags, like Dakota Johnson is
flip flops, like okay, that's mine. Yeah, but you're right,
and shout out to the short Kings because but I
like again, five ten, that's my cutoff right there.
Speaker 4 (18:38):
Do you have anything on that level like flip flop
or something like that that's not like basketball, something like
that some would consider minor, not even like.
Speaker 2 (18:46):
Okay, this is a good question. I'm gonna play a song.
Speaker 3 (18:48):
You guys call us with your red flags that are
just like crazy Land, and I will think of a
small little one for myself. Six one seven nine three
one one nine four five six one seven nine three
one one nine four five little red flags that are
weird for you. The Fireman's sisters say, use.
Speaker 2 (19:06):
Us guys that run run.
Speaker 3 (19:12):
Oh my god, Hi everybody, Good morning, It's Ashley and
the Gym. In Morning Show, Dakota Johnson, the actress from
Fifty Shades of Gray.
Speaker 2 (19:18):
And Madam Webb, which by the way, flopped.
Speaker 3 (19:21):
I think I love her though she saw it. She
said that her biggest red flag is a guy that
wears flip flops. She said, if you see a guy
wearing flip flops, run, aj goes, I know something that
is a red flag of yours. And I was like, what,
She's like a man that wears ankle socks absolutely disgusting.
Stop cover up your ankle bone. But guess what, I
look at it every day. I'm having sex with the
(19:43):
man that wears them.
Speaker 2 (19:45):
It's tough.
Speaker 4 (19:45):
Do you want to know something that's worse than both
of those boat shoes?
Speaker 2 (19:49):
Boat shoes hate like the hay dude type of the hay.
Speaker 4 (19:53):
Dudes, But then they transition to the ones that are
like a vineyard vines one.
Speaker 2 (19:57):
Oh, yeah, it's not my vibe.
Speaker 3 (20:00):
Melissa is in Abington. Melissa agrees with aj. Smoking definitely
a red flag?
Speaker 2 (20:05):
What else?
Speaker 11 (20:06):
Yeah, it's so crazy.
Speaker 7 (20:08):
I agree with everything you just said. So smoking in drugs.
Speaker 8 (20:12):
I didn't play basketball in college, but.
Speaker 7 (20:15):
I would play pick up at like a rec center.
And my thing was if I could be doing a sport,
I cannot date you.
Speaker 2 (20:21):
Yeah, dude, who are you protecting? As somebody comes in
with a gun, I gotta jump up. I'm gonna you
can't protect me?
Speaker 7 (20:30):
All right?
Speaker 2 (20:30):
Melissa, thank you.
Speaker 3 (20:31):
By the way, when you say drugs, do you mean
like like.
Speaker 7 (20:34):
Like anything and everything?
Speaker 3 (20:37):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (20:37):
All right, shut up, un let's thank you for the call.
Megan is in graft And Meg, what's your red flag? Hey?
Speaker 6 (20:45):
So mine definitely would be like bad oral hygiene.
Speaker 2 (20:49):
Okay, so like yellow teeth, Maybe brushes with his wife's toothbrush,
maybe doesn't brush at all. Yeah, okay, yeah.
Speaker 10 (20:57):
And by the way, like I'm I'm on a dating
site and I like, if I see yellow teeth, that's
just like I automatically it's like now.
Speaker 3 (21:07):
Ye bye bye, we don't want any butter teeth today, Meg,
I agree.
Speaker 2 (21:13):
Uh. Nicky is in Boston, Nikki, tell everybody your red flag.
Speaker 6 (21:20):
So my biggest red flag for a guy is a
guy that wear bonnets in public.
Speaker 3 (21:25):
I can't like the thought of this is already giving
me tears in my eyes.
Speaker 2 (21:29):
I'm laughing so hard, Like why are you out here
being a nana? Like what are you doing?
Speaker 6 (21:35):
I don't know, but there is nothing masculine about that
at all.
Speaker 7 (21:39):
And that's what I.
Speaker 3 (21:41):
That's all I think of. I mean, listen, do I
wear when I have just blown my hair dried? Do
I toss my bonnet on in the house when I
take a shower? Well yeah, but I'm not leaving the house.
Speaker 2 (21:51):
No.
Speaker 7 (21:51):
I've seen guys out here with their head and I
can't stand.
Speaker 4 (21:55):
That's nuts.
Speaker 2 (21:55):
And I stand with you on that, Nikki. Thank you
for the call. Amy is in Franklin. Aim, tell everybody
what your red flag is.
Speaker 5 (22:03):
Well, I have to agree. I'm five to nine, so
height is definitely one. But right after that, if you
have dirty shoes, period, I don't care what shoes they are.
If they're all dirty and crooked and the tongue is
flopping and they're talking to you, I'm good. We don't
want to thank you.
Speaker 2 (22:17):
Yeah, we don't want to speak. We don't want to
speak to your shoes. We want to ye.
Speaker 5 (22:20):
Dirty shoes is a no go because that just speaks
to me about hygiene.
Speaker 2 (22:24):
Oh interesting, all right, Barrian, Ammy, thank you so much
for the call. I mean, everybody has their thing, right.
Speaker 3 (22:30):
I just think if you are somebody you know, let's
just use AJ for example, like I, you should just
be wide open. You should like the person could have
yellow teeth, bad shoes, their breath smells, they haven't showered
in eight weeks.
Speaker 2 (22:43):
Beggars can't be choosers.
Speaker 4 (22:44):
But some people just are. And it's sad to see.
Speaker 2 (22:47):
Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Speaker 1 (22:51):
Show Good Morning, Bustin's number one for hip hop jam
in ninety four or five.
Speaker 3 (22:59):
Hi, guys, good morning, I got a DM from anonymous,
and I tried to begg her to come on because
I was like, I want to hear more because I
think it's important, you know. I wanted to guess this
poor guy up before we, uh we got to this part.
Speaker 2 (23:10):
But she said no, no, no, no, I'll be listening.
Speaker 3 (23:13):
By the way, if you're going through anything and you
kind of want just an outside opinion, you can always
DM me at Ashley Feldman two e's on the Ashley
so Son. She goes, here's the topic, ash how old
is too old to still be living with your parents?
So of course I write back, give me a little more.
Speaker 2 (23:32):
She says, everything is great, everything is going well, things
are good. But he's thirty, he works full time and
he's still living at home.
Speaker 4 (23:44):
This one's pushing it, like it depends what the situation is,
Like does he want to save money, but he's working
full time, so he should have enough and should want
to be out of the house. So this one is
just over the line for me.
Speaker 3 (23:56):
Do you notice that when guys call in they say
they're single. One of the first like, within my first
five questions, I'm like, where do you live? Yeah, do
you have a car? Because it matters like it does
it matters now listen sign of the times. I think
a lot more people are staying at home because financially
it doesn't make sense for them to live on their
(24:17):
own or whatever they came to be.
Speaker 2 (24:18):
But you can get roommates. You definitely cant get live
the life of having multiple roommates, and you know what
I mean, like get out on your own.
Speaker 4 (24:26):
Like I feel like, if you're in your twenties, then
I can understand totally. You can definitely do it. But
if you're thirty, if it's thirty, you need to be
out of the house to write.
Speaker 2 (24:34):
Hear that too, like are you is he three zero
on the dot? Like what?
Speaker 4 (24:37):
Like I need because I always think of the whole thing. Like,
say you go on a date and things are going well,
you want to bring somebody back to your place. It's
really hard to bring a date back to your parents'
house and you really can't get too comfortable there.
Speaker 2 (24:48):
Never forget.
Speaker 3 (24:49):
While my friend went on a date, guy was like,
do you want to come back to my house? And
mommy and Daddy were sitting in.
Speaker 2 (24:54):
The living room.
Speaker 3 (24:55):
First off balls on his part, but they were just
it was there. He lived with his parents and they
were sitting in the living room when he brought my
friend back. Yeah, who's thirty eight years old.
Speaker 4 (25:05):
And for that poor girl, then what then you go
into his room where you guys you have to stay
confined and then shut in to the bathroom like that.
You can't do it.
Speaker 3 (25:12):
I know, I know, but yeah, it's tough, Like it's
a weird because everybody's financial situation is different.
Speaker 2 (25:21):
You certainly don't want to judge.
Speaker 3 (25:22):
And they're listen, there's levels to this, right, Maybe the
person's home because grandma lives there and they need help
taking care of her. I don't know's there's things right
that you could maybe be like, okay, I could understand.
Speaker 2 (25:33):
But say, this guy is thirty five years old, works
full time and still living with mommy and daddy. Like
I don't. I don't feel good about that.
Speaker 4 (25:39):
I feel like this is a major issue because she's
dming us as like asking you about this, so she
feels uncomfortable about this. And it's more than just the
fact that like he's taking care of anybody. I think
he just can't cut the cord, like get out of
the house.
Speaker 2 (25:53):
Let's see what other people think.
Speaker 3 (25:54):
Let's make him thirty five because she just put in
his thirties and that's tough.
Speaker 2 (25:59):
We don't know, Oh is he thirty on the dot?
Speaker 4 (26:01):
Which makes it worse. He's thirty five, man, this is bad.
Speaker 3 (26:05):
Thirty five years old works full time. Every other part
of him is great, like things are going well. But
he lives at home with mommy and daddy. And if
she's going to spend time with him there, she's gonna
be looking at baby photos of him.
Speaker 4 (26:19):
You're trying to be quiet.
Speaker 2 (26:21):
Six one seven, nine three one one nine four five
six one seven nine three one one nine four five
A Has anybody gone through this? And B thirty five
years old? Come back to my house. Mom's making spaghetti.
I'm good, hilarious six one seven nine three one one
nine four five. You want to join the combo? Uh?
Speaker 3 (26:41):
Anonymous is dating a guy. It's going really, really well.
And you know what, as I say this out loud,
it's been tough in these streets. We hear it on
every Tuesday for beyond this white Maybe this is something
now in this day and age, people are gonna have
to suck up.
Speaker 2 (26:53):
I don't like it.
Speaker 3 (26:54):
But the guy's thirty five years old, works full time
and lives at home with mommy and daddy, and she's like,
I can't handle it.
Speaker 2 (27:02):
It's the one thing that's holding her.
Speaker 4 (27:04):
Back as an adult. You can't stomach that because it's uncomfortable.
Speaker 3 (27:07):
Kinga is in Worcester almost thirty two years old, so
thirty one, almost thirty two, and you still live at
home with your parents as well as your boyfriend. Now,
I think this makes it a little different because you
guys are both in the same situation, don't you.
Speaker 12 (27:24):
Yes, I agree. You know, obviously financial situations are tough,
but I think we also have that European background that
you know, you live with your parents until you know,
kind of that you're married. Not that we're you know,
we don't have to do that. We're over to getting
a house before getting married. But you know, life is
stuff out there, and we both get along with all
of our parents well, and it just makes sense for us.
Speaker 3 (27:47):
I live at home with mom and dad. Okay, I
meet somebody who also lives at home with mom and dad.
I think this is null and void. I don't even
think we have time. We're both going through the same situation.
We probably both say we can't wait for one day
to not live with mom and that. But if one
does and one doesn't, that that's tough.
Speaker 12 (28:06):
Right, yeah, correct, And you know, obviously people's relationships with
their parents are different, the partner relationship is different.
Speaker 6 (28:15):
But I want, I just.
Speaker 12 (28:16):
Want to tell anonymous there's nothing to be ashamed of.
You know, maybe if this guy has no savings and
I don't know, it's really has a bad I don't
even know how to explain it.
Speaker 2 (28:26):
Well, no, listen, no, I know what you're saying.
Speaker 3 (28:27):
Because we had some girl calling. She didn't want to
come on, but she was like, maybe he has a
gambling addiction. But so what you're getting at is like,
if there's something else going on as to why they
have to live at home with mom and dad, then
we might want to dig in.
Speaker 12 (28:38):
Yeah maybe of course, like age like, yeah, they trust me.
I don't want to live at thirty two with my parents.
Speaker 5 (28:43):
Like I want to get out.
Speaker 12 (28:45):
I've been wanting to get out, but just d to
the you know, lifestyles and the world and financial situations.
Speaker 7 (28:51):
It's you know, it is what it is.
Speaker 2 (28:52):
And let me ask you something. Do you guys do
sleepovers at each person's parents house?
Speaker 7 (28:58):
No?
Speaker 8 (28:59):
But with this relationship.
Speaker 12 (29:00):
It's still pretty new. But the fact that we're taking
our relationship serious, like you know, we're probably going to
find a house within a year or something. Okay to
be to be determined, but you know, I'm sure my
mom wouldn't be okay with my mom would be okay
for him to sleep over like that the other day
when he was over.
Speaker 3 (29:17):
Right, all right, Well, best of luck to you guys,
and thank you for this other perspective where she's like,
it's nothing to be ashamed of.
Speaker 2 (29:23):
It's fine.
Speaker 3 (29:23):
By the way, I remember when I first met the
fireman and he started telling me about like some of
his friends and stuff and oh, they might meet.
Speaker 2 (29:31):
Us out whatever in Southie.
Speaker 3 (29:34):
Yeah, like a lot of them live at home till
late later.
Speaker 4 (29:42):
Thirties, could be. Yeah, it's like, come on.
Speaker 2 (29:44):
Not everybody, but this happens like it's not it does? Uh?
Jess is in framing Uh not to be confused with
framing him. I don't know, Hi, Jess, how are.
Speaker 5 (29:57):
You all right?
Speaker 2 (29:58):
So you think this is normal? Talk to me.
Speaker 10 (30:00):
This is normal, and I'll tell you why. I am
of an Asian gal it is very cultural to live
with their parents. So I recently got engaged. My fiance
have been you know, hermon and I haven't lived with
my parents in the past four years. And when we
are getting married, even when we buy our next house,
they're expected to live with us until we they grew
(30:22):
old to pass away.
Speaker 4 (30:24):
Wyeah, yeah, no way, no way.
Speaker 7 (30:31):
Yeah.
Speaker 10 (30:32):
We've lived together for four years and he actually loves it.
He actually loves it. He's like, it's so easy, I
come home if you don't want to pok moms books already,
Like what else is it?
Speaker 6 (30:41):
Why?
Speaker 2 (30:42):
Why have why go.
Speaker 10 (30:43):
Out and spend so much money on rent, live at
home and get all those lovelieres?
Speaker 2 (30:48):
All right? So wait, but like you have no privacy.
Speaker 10 (30:53):
So we converted our basement into a full studio basically
without the kitchen. So we share a kitchen, but our
basement is basically a full on studio. So they're upstairs
on the second floor. We're all the way downstairs.
Speaker 4 (31:05):
All right.
Speaker 10 (31:05):
That's helping it noisy, if you know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (31:09):
That's what I'm saying.
Speaker 4 (31:10):
That helps.
Speaker 3 (31:11):
But yeah, I guess, listen, if it's a cultural thing,
I can I can get behind it. And I understand
she's not giving me that vibe. Jess it's not like
she's saying he told me, you know what I mean.
She's just saying thirty five years old, he works full
time and he lives at home.
Speaker 2 (31:25):
Like it's I don't I think it'd be different.
Speaker 10 (31:27):
He'll say, you're dating. I will say your dating pool
is definitely shorter because a lot of people don't understand
that culturally. Like I can't go out there say it,
not with my fiance going out there and saying, hey,
by the way, not only are you going to live
with my parents before we're even engaged, but when we
get married, you're expected to do the exact same thing. Oh,
I couldn't very differ.
Speaker 3 (31:48):
I couldn't agree with you more. I would be like,
thank you so much for this drink. I'm out because
like I couldn't do it.
Speaker 2 (31:54):
So, yes, I can see why you're dating. Pool would shrink. Yeah,
like my mother and I. Yes, God, that's I. We'll
call her for anything, my bestie, that's my gal. If
we live together, I would be in jail. Okay, in jail.
Diddy and I together, yeah, murder.
Speaker 10 (32:10):
Well, I get it. There are like times where they're
butt heads or even my parents and I butt heads
on him. And I feel like I'm stuck in the middle.
But I think at the end of the day, it's
like it's cultural as a respect saying like I want
to make sure my parents are set when they get there,
so and he understands that, thankfully. And I found a
partner that'll thing to understand it. But like I said,
it's very difficult finding a person you want to date
(32:31):
for having a selective few that is willing to do
that long term. There are guys that will say, Okay,
I'm fine with it and then realize maybe a couple
of years later we need to move out.
Speaker 6 (32:42):
Yeah, yeah, it's difficult.
Speaker 3 (32:45):
Well listen, it is difficult, and thank you for the
perspective on it. We're getting a lot of different because
obviously I'm getting DMS people being like absolutely not thirty
five full time should be living on his own.
Speaker 2 (32:55):
But there's I can't fight the cultural aspect to it.
But I don't think that's what this is.
Speaker 4 (33:00):
To her point, Culturally, uh, Dominicans, sometimes this will happen.
But I'll also say culturally, most cultures are more more
respectful to boundaries. The White and laws are not respectful
to boundaries. They intrude and that's the issue there.
Speaker 2 (33:14):
Whites don't see boundary. They just like they're like, hey,
I'm here and there's in your bedroom.
Speaker 4 (33:20):
Say morning show, Good morning.
Speaker 1 (33:23):
Boston's number one for hip hop, he am in ninety
four or five.
Speaker 2 (33:29):
Andia's issues.
Speaker 3 (33:30):
We know this about him, and in your head you're
probably running through all of them thinking, what is she
about to talk about? I don't know if people really
have we spoken about the things that you do on
the road. People really know about this.
Speaker 4 (33:44):
We mentioned it one time, like years years ago, so
they don't really know.
Speaker 3 (33:48):
No, santi is he will cut you off and then
he will pretend as if it is your fault. He
has like these tactics that he does when he does
something wrong on the road, So he is at faull
in all of these.
Speaker 2 (34:00):
Stories, you guys, he is at fault, but he tries.
Speaker 3 (34:04):
To put it on the other person as if it's
something that they have done.
Speaker 4 (34:07):
Yeah, so I'll cut somebody off and then they'll always
pull up because you always have to do the thing
of like you want to see what the person looks
looks like right you pull up next to them.
Speaker 2 (34:18):
If I do something wrong, I don't want to look
at them but I don't.
Speaker 4 (34:21):
Want does it to you? You pull up and you turn,
you want to write there, you do it.
Speaker 2 (34:26):
That's true.
Speaker 9 (34:26):
If someone is something bad to me, I'm like, who
did that? So when somebody does that to me, I
can feel them coming up.
Speaker 4 (34:31):
So I always you make like a funny face or
look like like I'll cross my eyes or something like
that to just throw them off and they don't know
what to do. Yesterday, it was my fault again and
the lady pulled up next to me. So what I
did this time? And I have to say this because
I feel like it goes with the story. She was attractive, right,
(34:51):
she was not. So I looked at her and I
pointed at her and I went like that and the
way I held my hand was like kind of like
kind of like kind of limpy, like you know that
center And she followed me for twelve miles. Got off
the exit. I was only able to escape because I
pulled into the home depot parking lot, did a few things,
(35:12):
and then went towards my house because my house is
right off the highway.
Speaker 9 (35:15):
Yeah, she followed me like she didn't come into home depot,
but she did not, but she was following me one
thousand percent. And again I don't think she would have
done anything to me because like physically, like she couldn't.
Speaker 4 (35:24):
She was very small. But at the same time, I
was like, this is a little crazy, Like what did
she think she was going to do? Yesterday? I got
into my head. I'm like, was that I need to
stop doing this because it's one thing to give somebody
the finger. I feel like you can stomach the finger,
but if somebody is able to insult you like that, yeah,
that's a different emotion there.
Speaker 3 (35:42):
You have to understand, though people die from road rage incidents.
I know people are out here killing each other because
of road rage.
Speaker 4 (35:50):
But I didn't think this was road rage. I just
thought it was like augh, you know, and I.
Speaker 2 (35:54):
Thought that that was solved that But none of it
should ever get to that. But it does because people
don't like this stuff. Stop wait, stop risking your life.
Speaker 4 (36:03):
This Back in the day when I used to do
stunting on the radio station and I had these in
my car for something else, but then I kept the
miss in my car. So I used to have little
signs that I would hold up. One would be the finger,
one would say f you, and all these things so
when I would have these things in the car, i'd
be able to pull it up and have a sign
of you. There were a few of my figure with
(36:24):
the other ones like kind of.
Speaker 3 (36:26):
Had I can't we can't even go into a depth
of the things that he'll do in the car, but
like this man will go as as far as like
to drool, like in the front seat, you know what
I mean.
Speaker 2 (36:37):
Like to like someone. He'll cut somebody off and then
that person will pull up next to him so pissed off,
and then they look and it's a it's a man
drooling behind the wheel.
Speaker 4 (36:46):
But if you think about it, right, if you saw that,
what do you do?
Speaker 2 (36:49):
Do?
Speaker 4 (36:49):
You just go? Oh, like I get it.
Speaker 2 (36:51):
Yeah, I'd be like, I'm sorry. I didn't even do
anything wrong.
Speaker 4 (36:53):
I'd be like, I'm sorry, or are you?
Speaker 5 (36:55):
Like?
Speaker 4 (36:55):
What is that person driving? Exactly right? So that's the
whole effect that I'm kind of going for, and it
usually just mitigates the whole conflict. Yeah they didn't.
Speaker 3 (37:05):
No road Ridge is real people, you hear just like
these crazy crazy stories.
Speaker 2 (37:11):
I've been in the car with the fireman. He has
it a couple times.
Speaker 4 (37:15):
I know you told me one story where like there
was almost like an altercation.
Speaker 2 (37:18):
Right.
Speaker 8 (37:18):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (37:18):
So I was driving and we were pulling out of
a liquor store, obviously, and the guy wanted my spot, right,
He wanted me to pull out fast we could get
the spot. So I'm trying to reverse and he's not
backing up enough for me to get out of the spot.
So the fireman like leans out of the window and
like gives him the hand, like, hey, just back up
a little bit, like she's driving him.
Speaker 2 (37:38):
She can't get out, and the guy goes off. He's like, ef,
you let's go, and then he let's go. Bitch.
Speaker 3 (37:48):
Fireman didn't like that, did not like that. So then
he gets out of the car. He yells at him,
gets back in the car. We reverse out. The guy,
instead of.
Speaker 2 (37:57):
Pulling into the spot, speeds ahead of me and cuts
off our car. Whoa, so we can't My hands were
so tight on the wheel because again, you don't know,
you don't know if people are like you just don't
know how mad people are. I mean, he called me a.
Speaker 3 (38:13):
Bitch, Why are you Like, yeah, it was We've had
a few.
Speaker 2 (38:16):
Instances like that.
Speaker 4 (38:16):
I have to say that Massachusetts is probably one of
the worst places where I see it like every morning,
especially with like the fastening stuff. If you're in the
fast lane not going fast and the cars get so
close to you.
Speaker 2 (38:26):
Happened this morning. I understand me too. I got I
get over that. I was going like seventy five. I
wasn't going slow, but the truck got so like within
an inch of me. I got over right away.
Speaker 3 (38:39):
I don't.
Speaker 2 (38:40):
I don't mess around like ya, let me get out
of your way, buddy. Yeah. Cool, but that, Yeah, that
happens a lot.
Speaker 4 (38:45):
And then you hear the stories about people like pulling
guns and like firing, which that's what I'm saying. Yeah,
I understand. But again, like Massachusetts is next level. And
that's one I think if you start to drooling all
this stuff, like oh, like all right, that is fine.
Just pushed a lot.
Speaker 2 (38:57):
You just drewl in your front seat. Maybe save a life.
Six one seven nine three one one nine four five
six one seven nine three one one nine four five.
There is something about the road rage in Massachusetts that's different.
Have you been involved? Hi, everybody, Good morning, It's Acshuley
and the jam In Morning Show.
Speaker 3 (39:15):
It'sat even just telling me a story from years back
of a road rage incident on ninety three where guy
just pulls out a gun and shoots a lady for
cutting out, Like the is crazy out there.
Speaker 4 (39:26):
And now the guy's gonna now he's doing life. So yeah,
it's insane out there. Right.
Speaker 3 (39:30):
There's something about that being in the car for people
that it puts you to a new level of edge.
I mean, listen, when I'm in bumper to number of traffic,
it does like it does something to my soul.
Speaker 2 (39:40):
I'm not myself.
Speaker 4 (39:41):
You also feel like a safety net when you're in
your car, right because you're traveling. You don't think that
somebody can get to you. It's different than if you
pass onody on the street and even little things.
Speaker 2 (39:48):
I mean if if if you and I get to
an intersection to stop signs at the same time and
I wave you to go because it's either marry you
and we could both go at the same time, and
I wave you to go, and you don't give me
the yeah, who are you?
Speaker 6 (40:02):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (40:02):
And why did your mother hate you? Because that's that's
not right I And it's like I think about it
later on in the day, it's like, let let it go.
Riva is in Southbridge, VA. People are mad out there
behind the wheel.
Speaker 5 (40:17):
Yeah, yes they are.
Speaker 13 (40:19):
Oh my goodness. My husband asking all the time, how
do I get myself into these things?
Speaker 2 (40:23):
What happened?
Speaker 11 (40:26):
So I'm driving to work. It's probably like six forty five.
Speaker 13 (40:29):
In the morning, like no one should be that angry
in the morning, and there was an accident.
Speaker 11 (40:33):
So I was like, I'm gonna be laying for work.
Speaker 13 (40:35):
It's it's what it is. So there, I don't know
where the accident is, so I'm.
Speaker 11 (40:40):
Thinking, like I should probably go over, but I was like,
you know what, I'm just gonna wait whatever.
Speaker 13 (40:44):
Next thing, you know, there's this truck driver to my
right hanging.
Speaker 11 (40:48):
Out of his window screaming at me, and I'm like,
oh my gosh, what.
Speaker 12 (40:52):
Is your issue?
Speaker 11 (40:53):
I was like, okay, dude, whatever, Like I'll.
Speaker 13 (40:54):
Go behind you.
Speaker 11 (40:55):
Like it's not that big a deal.
Speaker 10 (40:57):
So I the car.
Speaker 13 (40:59):
Behind him lets me go in. He's hanging out of.
Speaker 11 (41:01):
His window in front of me, screaming at me, and
I'm like, okay, dude, whatever.
Speaker 8 (41:05):
So I flip them off.
Speaker 13 (41:07):
He breaks out and I'm like, oh my goodness. So
I go around him and so his lane is stopped.
The lane that I'm in now goes ahead of him,
so as I'm passing him, I shake out my tongue
in both my middle fingers and I'm like, whatever.
Speaker 5 (41:22):
Dude, so.
Speaker 8 (41:25):
Who told me to do that?
Speaker 13 (41:26):
He got so pissed he ripped his wheel to the
right and tried to knock me off the road.
Speaker 2 (41:30):
Oh my god, this was a scene.
Speaker 11 (41:35):
It was so it just so happened that it happened
in front of like where the accident was.
Speaker 13 (41:40):
So after I was like, oh my gosh, imu die,
I like sped away.
Speaker 2 (41:44):
He didn't follow me.
Speaker 13 (41:45):
So I'm wondering if.
Speaker 11 (41:46):
The police saw what he did and kept him because
it was crazy.
Speaker 3 (41:50):
Yeah, that's a lot, but that listen, this is there's
a zero shock in my eyes because this is what
happens out there in the streets. People act nuts and listen.
I've also been in a culprit by the way, and
reavia thank you for the call of I do something
wrong and the person is like mother efing me and
I'm going.
Speaker 2 (42:07):
I'm sorry, I'll hit my chest like. There are times
where I know it does and it doesn't. Sometimes some
people they don't care because they're that mad. But yes,
I had, but I I'm not the perfect driver. I've
messed up. I'm from New Jersey. We're notorious for being
bad drivers.
Speaker 4 (42:21):
But I think the expectation, at least what people think
is that like, if something like that happens, they don't
take responsibility for it. They give you the F you back,
which causes a whole thing. Just mitigate it.
Speaker 3 (42:30):
Also, can I just say I don't like use the
middle finger. I don't do this.
Speaker 4 (42:36):
I don't.
Speaker 2 (42:37):
I don't even know.
Speaker 3 (42:38):
Like that is so weird to me that people will think,
like I never use middle to be honest. People that
give the middle finger, I'm like, you're the weirdo. Yes,
do that two things in the car. That's the universal
sign for FU. So everybody can can understand that in
the car. But that's also why I had the signs.
Speaker 2 (42:53):
I could just lift up the sign and yeah, Like
if I would much rather hold up a postcard that
said like F you, And I see people.
Speaker 3 (43:00):
Running around giving both middle fingers, I'm like, are you okay?
Speaker 2 (43:03):
Like do you a little sim of t L
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