Beach Too Sandy, Water Too Wet
A comedy podcast featuring dramatic readings of one-star reviews written by real people with not-so-real problems. Hosted by Xandy and Christine Schiefer. Produced by the Forever Dog Podcast Network.
Episodes
May 7, 2025 • 102 mins
Apologies for confusing Helen Mirren with the real star of Devil Wears Prada, Diane Keaton.
See Christine and her popcorn pants on tour!! https://www.beachtoosandy.com/tour
Join our Patreon for Noddy content! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy
We have merch! https://www.beachtoosandy.store
Xandy's stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer
Watch clips of your favorite moments! https://www.youtube.com/beachtoosandywatertoowet...
Mark as Played
April 30, 2025 • 84 mins
We love Pinto Macbean and definitely not because we're afraid of him!
See us on tour!! https://www.beachtoosandy.com/tour
Join our Patreon for Noddy content! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy
We have merch! https://www.beachtoosandy.store
Xandy's stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer
Watch clips of your favorite moments! https://www.youtube.com/beachtoosandywatertoowetWatch videos from our episodes on TikTok! https://t...
Mark as Played
April 23, 2025 • 65 mins
Everyone wish Christine a happy birthday!
See us on tour!! https://www.beachtoosandy.com/tour
Join our Patreon for Noddy content! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy
We have merch! https://www.beachtoosandy.store
Xandy's stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer
Watch clips of your favorite moments! https://www.youtube.com/beachtoosandywatertoowet
Watch videos from our episodes on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy
Xtine's Et...
Mark as Played
April 16, 2025 • 95 mins
See us on tour and don't throw quarters at us!! https://www.beachtoosandy.com/tour
Join our Patreon for Noddy content! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy
We have merch! https://www.beachtoosandy.store
Xandy's stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer
Watch clips of your favorite moments! https://www.youtube.com/beachtoosandywatertoowet
Watch videos from our episodes on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy
Xtine's Etsy: https://...
Mark as Played
April 9, 2025 • 92 mins
See us on tour and at our EPCOT after party!! https://www.beachtoosandy.com/tour
Join our Patreon to get pre-sale access! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy
We have merch! https://www.beachtoosandy.store
Xandy's stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer
Watch clips of your favorite moments! https://www.youtube.com/beachtoosandywatertoowet
Watch videos from our episodes on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy
Xtine's Etsy: https...
Mark as Played
April 2, 2025 • 83 mins
SEE US ON TOUR!!! Tickets on sale this Friday!! https://www.beachtoosandy.com/tour
Join our Patreon to get pre-sale access! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy
We have merch! https://www.beachtoosandy.store
Xandy's stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer
Watch clips of your favorite moments! https://www.youtube.com/beachtoosandywatertoowet
Watch videos from our episodes on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy
Xtine's Etsy: htt...
Mark as Played
March 26, 2025 • 68 mins
After recording this episode, Xandy found an empty can of rootbeer on his floor.
Join our Patreon to watch us watch Noddy being naughty! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy
We have merch! https://www.beachtoosandy.store
Xandy's stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer
Watch clips of your favorite moments! https://www.youtube.com/beachtoosandywatertoowet
Watch videos from our episodes on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy
Xtin...
Mark as Played
March 19, 2025 • 74 mins
If your name is O'Brien, Murphy, Fitzpatrick, etc. it's a very BIG day.
Join our Patreon to watch us watch Noddy being naughty! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy
We have merch! https://www.beachtoosandy.store
Xandy's stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer
Watch clips of your favorite moments! https://www.youtube.com/beachtoosandywatertoowet
Watch videos from our episodes on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy
Xtine's Etsy:...
Mark as Played
March 12, 2025 • 78 mins
We expect to see your thumbs up if you like this episode.
Join our Patreon to watch us watch Noddy deal with Goblins! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy
We have merch! https://www.beachtoosandy.store
Xandy's stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer
Watch clips of your favorite moments! https://www.youtube.com/beachtoosandywatertoowet
Watch videos from our episodes on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy
Xtine's Etsy: https://w...
Mark as Played
March 5, 2025 • 71 mins
We're confident Jimmy Carter would've been a sand monster.
Join our Patreon to watch us watch Noddy for some reason! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy
We have merch! https://www.beachtoosandy.store
Xandy's stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer
Watch clips of your favorite moments! https://www.youtube.com/beachtoosandywatertoowet
Watch videos from our episodes on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy
Xtine's Etsy: https://ww...
Mark as Played
February 26, 2025 • 91 mins
If you see Christine by the Charles River trying to sell you on eternal life... no you didn't.
Join our not so secret labor force! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy
We have merch! https://www.beachtoosandy.store
Xandy's stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer
Watch clips of your favorite moments! https://www.youtube.com/beachtoosandywatertoowet
Watch videos from our episodes on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy
Xtine's Et...
Mark as Played
February 19, 2025 • 85 mins
A new wave of freshness! Listen now!
Join our not so secret labor force! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy
We have merch! https://www.beachtoosandy.store
Xandy's stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer
Watch clips of your favorite moments! https://www.youtube.com/beachtoosandywatertoowet
Watch videos from our episodes on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy
Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/thextinefiles
Learn more abo...
Mark as Played
February 12, 2025 • 90 mins
Sit around the fire as Christine regales you with the Ballad of Dr. Perky
Send us a voicemail! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy
We have merch! https://www.beachtoosandy.store
Xandy's stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer
Watch clips of your favorite moments! https://www.youtube.com/beachtoosandywatertoowet
Watch videos from our episodes on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy
Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/thexti...
Mark as Played
February 5, 2025 • 111 mins
Susej, I choose you!
Send us a voicemail! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy
We have merch! https://www.beachtoosandy.store
Xandy's stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer
Watch clips of your favorite moments! https://www.youtube.com/beachtoosandywatertoowet
Watch videos from our episodes on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy
Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/thextinefiles
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megap...
Mark as Played
January 29, 2025 • 66 mins
A big yellow star took my business away.
Ad-free listening and full video episodes! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy
We have merch! https://www.beachtoosandy.store
Xandy's stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer
Watch clips of your favorite moments! https://www.youtube.com/beachtoosandywatertoowet
Watch videos from our episodes on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy
Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/thextinefiles
Lea...
Mark as Played
January 22, 2025 • 101 mins
Xandy is streaming again! We'll see how long that lasts...
Xandy's stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer
Ad-free listening and full video episodes! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy
We have merch! https://www.beachtoosandy.store
Watch clips of your favorite moments! https://www.youtube.com/beachtoosandywatertoowet
Watch videos from our episodes on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy
Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop...
Mark as Played
January 15, 2025 • 62 mins
Do you remember your first polycarbonate hardside spinner luggage?
Ad-free listening and full video episodes! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy
We have merch! https://www.beachtoosandy.store
Watch clips of your favorite moments! https://www.youtube.com/beachtoosandywatertoowet
Watch videos from our episodes on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy
Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/thextinefiles
Xandy's stream: t...
Mark as Played
January 8, 2025 • 86 mins
How else am I supposed to watch you poop??
Ad-free listening and full video episodes! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy
We have merch! https://www.beachtoosandy.store
Watch clips of your favorite moments! https://www.youtube.com/beachtoosandywatertoowet
Watch videos from our episodes on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy
Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/thextinefiles
Xandy's stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer
L...
Mark as Played
January 1, 2025 • 61 mins
happy wonderwall!!!!! bapp.
We have merch! https://www.beachtoosandy.store
Ad-free listening and full video episodes! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy
Watch clips of your favorite moments! https://www.youtube.com/beachtoosandywatertoowet
Watch videos from our episodes on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy
Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/thextinefiles
Xandy's stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer
Learn more about...
Mark as Played
December 25, 2024 • 82 mins
Happy Holidays! We hope this episode isn't the highlight of your occasion.
We have merch! https://www.beachtoosandy.store
Ad-free listening and full video episodes! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy
Watch clips of your favorite moments! https://www.youtube.com/beachtoosandywatertoowet
Watch videos from our episodes on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy
Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/thextinefiles
Xandy's s...
Mark as Played
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