June 5, 2024 • 14 mins
On tonight’s episode I will be exploring the ways that being impatient has cost me across all the domains of my life and how I have managed to recover.
Also as has become customary I will catch those that are following up on my family’s odyssey of purpose and on where I sit currently across all 4 domains.
This will be an interesting topic so check it out today when I go live on Facebook or YouTube or when I post on tonight on YouTube and all major podcast platforms!
I am in a place right now where I am trying to impact as many ADHD parents as a possibly can because God has really just put it on my head to be of service.
So I want to give you an hour of my time completely free!
In that hour I will apply my training as a life coach to assess your biggest obstacles and give you at least three strategies customized to provide immediate relief in your life. Free of cost or obligation.
Register for your free consultation now while my schedule still has openings! Free Consultation
I can’t wait to help you take back your life! See you soon!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Hello, welcome back to Authentic On Airwith Bruce Alexander.
(00:02):
I am your host, Bruce Alexander.
And as you can see, I'm sporting my CapeCod shirt because we just came back from
the ocean, the coast, and I feel like acompletely different person.
I want to start by just for one, talkingabout how funny the process is.
I was ready to.
throw it all away and just give up ontrying to be a healthier person ever again
(00:27):
because my back was so jacked up.
Today I walked with my kids two and a halfmiles and I'm sitting here presenting my
podcast standing up because I don't have achair here.
There's not there's not a good sit downsituation here but I'm literally okay for
the first time standing up for more thantwo minutes at a time and that's on top of
(00:49):
having taken
a two and a half mile walk and done someintermittent HIIT workouts, I feel the
best I've felt in a long time.
So I kind of skipped ahead.
That's, I just, I'm so excited to feellike my body is actually something that is
helping me again, versus it beingsomething that is a hindrance and an
obstacle to everything I want toaccomplish in my life.
(01:10):
So I just want anybody who is dealing withthe darkness of being unfit or being in
pain.
to know that if you're doing the rightthings and you're showing up for yourself,
even when it's hard, it does pay off.
Now, today I feel amazing.
Tomorrow I might feel like crap again, butthis one day is the best day that I've had
(01:32):
in months.
And so it is totally worth it just for afeeling of remembering what it feels like
to actually move my body again.
So yeah, just keep trying.
The podcast has...
Really being, I mean, every, like all ofmy content creation has been kind of
taking a little bit of a backseat rightnow because for one, I was not doing a
(01:57):
good job of trusting the process.
I was trying to take everything back undermy control, things I had let go and given
to God.
And I was really enjoying life by trustinga higher power.
I had started to get scared and started toadd things back onto my plate.
Just grab one thing at a time and add itback onto my plate to where I was in this.
this chaos of scarcity so like I didn'treally know how to operate.
(02:21):
And I realized that I was doing this, Iwas stacking and I was like, you know
what, like I'm starting to put things backon my plate that I had been feeling so
much better knowing that I had given themto God and that they were things that I
can't control right now.
Like I can do the small steps, I can dowhat I can do, but trying to will myself
(02:42):
into.
more clients trying to will myself into ahouse that's not showing up, trying to
will myself into the perfect relationshipis not going to happen.
I have to let go of the result and show upevery day and just be confident that I'm
taking the right steps to build, build mydream life.
And so having pulled back, taken some timeto reassess and to just kind of reground
(03:08):
myself.
I feel so much better getting back into.
content creation today.
So I'm usually one who's all about likejust show up for yourself, push through,
push through, but the why has to be there.
You have to understand why you're showingup and why you're pushing through because
yes, on bad days, you have to show up foryourself because that's when you're going
to grow.
But if you don't remember why you'reshowing up, you don't remember what the
(03:31):
process that you're supposed to betrusting is, then you are doing what
exactly the title of this episode is, isyou're being inefficient.
by being impatient.
You are taking, you're getting so worriedabout the, the end of the process coming
to you sooner that you're wasting energy.
You're wasting time.
You're wasting all kinds of things bytrying to hurry up something that you
(03:54):
can't hurry up.
So cycle back a little bit.
Sorry.
I'm a little geeked up today.
I got the blood flowing energy going, but,as I said, let's just do our little, our,
our four domain check -in.
Body is feeling the best it has felt in along time.
I'm still standing right now.
Like that is something that would not havebeen happening a month ago.
(04:17):
So, well, I've already been pretty goodabout that.
So I'll move on to my being.
It's hard because I was not feeling asclose to God because I didn't realize that
I was hiding in that fear again.
I mean, this is something that I'm very,
(04:37):
open and saying is I'm scared a lot.
I'm trying not to get paralyzed by thatfear and I'm trying to stay on on target
and on focus to what I need to keep doingto keep taking small steps to building my
dream life.
It is easy to get impatient and try to hitthe home run and you end up striking out.
(04:57):
I don't want to strike out anymore.
I don't want to keep trying to take bigshots, you know.
Like I don't want to go all in every timeI sit down at the poker table and either
hit it big or lose all my chips becausemost of the time you lose all your chips.
And this has happened to me multiple timesand I'll talk about that more in a second.
So that's my body, that's my being.
Like right now I just need to show up andstop hiding from God because he already
(05:21):
knows my short fallings.
He already knows my fears and I just needto be truthful with myself so I can know
that he sees me.
I can feel seen and validated and heard.
and I can cleanse myself of those fearsand just walk in faith for him.
It's a very different feeling.
It doesn't mean that you're no longerscared.
(05:41):
It just gives you a strength to keepmoving.
My balance, things are going really goodwith Kate.
I just realized we've been on the road fora month and a half.
We have been without a home for a monthand a half.
It has happened so quickly, but it hasbeen truly amazing.
(06:01):
to like all the things I've taken my kidsto see, all the things that Kate has
accomplished that she said she would neverbe able to do, she's done and we have
grown closer together through all of that.
And I'm really thankful for this journeyfor giving us that.
Now, honestly, I would love to also findsome place to call home.
That is really, you know, really what iskind of weighing heavily on me right now
(06:23):
because this living from Airbnb to Airbnblife is not cheap.
I don't have any doubt that in the futuremoney will come, but I don't want money to
run out before we find some place that wecan call home and, you know, and start to
put down roots again.
So that is something that has been alittle bit challenging to work through,
(06:44):
but Kate and I have been really good atkind of taking turns as to being strong
for each other.
And that's like, that's a real partnershipfor me is that I can be vulnerable and I
can talk about whenever I'm struggling.
And she steps up and carries the weightfor me.
And today was one of those days where tostart the day, I was feeling really heavy
(07:05):
and I was really struggling with nottrusting the process and with, you know,
trying to bring the end result to me rightnow.
And she said, it's okay.
She was just there for me and, you know,and let me, you know, express my concerns
and heard me and saw me and validated meand let me get all that toxic crap out of
my brain.
And then I felt so much better.
(07:26):
It's so different whenever you have apartner that you're able to speak
truthfully to, and you don't have to putup a front.
When you're putting up a front, then youhave nowhere to turn whenever things are
tough.
You have nobody to talk to about whounderstands the truth of the predicament
you're in.
And that's a scary place.
That's a place that led to a lot ofdangerous things for me.
(07:47):
So body being balanced, and also thingswith the kids are going great.
They're going with my, you know,
Every time I go exercise, they go with meand we're having great walks and we're
having more experiences because I'm morephysically capable to do things.
And I'm more present because I'm lessworried about how I'm showing up for them.
And I'm just showing up for them.
And, you know, that's a lovely feeling.
(08:09):
And to just draw energy from thatrelationship is a really great experience
that I continue to feed into.
And it keeps feeding back into me andbusiness.
This is the one that continues to be astruggle because.
I'm a new business owner, like really likein all things, like in the scale of all
things, it's only been a little over ayear since I struck out on my own and it's
(08:30):
been less than six months and I reallysolidified who I'm trying to serve and
what I'm trying to do.
And so sometimes I doubt my ability to dowhat I do, even though my clients have all
seen the success of me doing what I do.
I just have trouble remembering thatsuccess.
I have trouble remembering.
that I am good enough.
(08:53):
I'm good enough for this and thateventually I'm gonna find my client base
that is going to allow me to do this fulltime without the fear of where the next
paycheck is gonna come from, without thefear of scarcity, without the fear of how
are we gonna pay for this place that we'retrying to live.
And I'll tell you what, the first stepthat I think that is gonna help drive me
there is being able to present like this.
(09:14):
Like I'm better at this.
Being able to be free in my body and likestand up.
Like this means I can go out to people andstart having conversations again and not
worrying about like, where can I sit down?
Where, you know, I need to make surethere's a place where I can be seated or
I'm not going to be able to like be atthat place.
This is, it's a game changer for me.
So physically being more fit has gotten memore excited about my business again.
(09:40):
Also like, you know, truth be told, nobodywants to take advice from a fat person.
you know, unless somebody's fatter thanme, then they might, but most people
aren't really keen on taking any kind ofadvice from somebody who looks like they
don't know what's going on in their body,which I do, you know, and I'm doing all
(10:00):
the things I can to take care of it.
So I'm not really concerned about whatthey think, but I know that perception and
I know that once I am, I am more fit andwell taken care of, it'll be, my appeal
will be much broader.
And so I'm really excited about thatbecause I see the growth happening.
I see where I'm starting to like, youknow, gain ground on that vision of me who
(10:25):
was this leader of people, this leader ofADHD parents who is bringing them along
and helping them see the success that I'veseen and, you know, feel the growth that I
felt.
So that's business.
Unfortunately, the truth of the businessis like, I need more clients.
I just do.
So I've been trying, like I try to, to setup a group thing and use Facebook ads.
(10:49):
And there was just a lot of noise andpeople who were not serious about like
improving their lives.
And I thought about doing it for a lowcost, I thought about doing it for no
cost.
And honestly, I'm just, I don't knowwhat's going on there.
I like, I haven't figured that part out,but like this free consultation game, I'm
really serious about, about just trying toget people in and have conversations with
(11:11):
them that changed their lives.
just one conversation to help their livesget better and then to work with them
moving forward if they like it, if theysee value in it, if they can make the
investment of themselves.
But being happy that I just got to make animpact on somebody through one call is the
(11:31):
goal right now to get more of those calls.
So all of this circles back around to...
You have to trust the process.
You have to, for one, you have to knowwhat your process is.
You have to know what the big pictureyou're driving towards is.
And then you have to like define the stepsthat you're taking and then just let go of
the result.
(11:52):
It's like if you were doing what you setforth, you are going to assess, you're
going to evaluate, but it's not about theresult.
It's about how you're about, you know,looking at the process as it goes and how
effective it is being.
And sometimes if you're working on thingslike me and my back, I had to just trust
that it was going to work because youcan't tell from day to day how much less
(12:15):
pain it is sometimes.
Sometimes you just have to trust that it'sgoing to work.
And you know, in the big part of that, Ididn't understand before, you know, the
past few months of learning how to trustthe process is that whenever you tell the
truth and whenever you're truly open andvulnerable about the process you're
developing,
then God enters that process.
(12:37):
And it is like whenever you can't figureout the answer, that answer is God.
And that is what I felt is like wheneveryou just show up and do the steps, God is
going to help get you to where you'retrying to go.
And I have so much trouble trusting thatin business because I don't know why.
(12:58):
Like business and God are not somethingthat I've felt like have matched in the
past, but.
I know that it's true because God is allthings.
So God is my body.
God is my relationship with my wife and mykids.
God is my relationship with myself.
Why would God not be my business as well?
So it's something that I have to stoptrying to rush and be more patient with
(13:23):
because whenever I stop being patient,whenever I stop trusting the process, I
waste money, I waste time, I waste energy,I waste resources, and it's silly.
So that is the overall goal of this wholeprocess is trust the process and don't be
so much in a rush that you're beinginefficient.
I'm gonna keep it short because I wanna goback and hang out with my family because
(13:44):
it's been a great day and I wannacontinue.
That is it for today.
I will talk to you next week on AuthenticOn Air.
Thank you so much for listening and alsoif you would like to have a free
consultation call where I promise I willgive you at least three strategies or
techniques that will help improve yourlife today.
then please go to www .impulsive .lifeforward slash consult and get free, like a
(14:07):
free one hour call in which I will giveyou those techniques based specifically
off of the situations and the strugglesthat you are going through right now.
It says for ADHD parents and I am reallylooking to help change some lives and help
to see the same growth I've seen in mine.
So I'll talk to you guys later, bye.
Hello, welcome back to Authentic On Airwith Bruce Alexander.
(00:02):
I am your host, Bruce Alexander.
And as you can see, I'm sporting my CapeCod shirt because we just came back from
the ocean, the coast, and I feel like acompletely different person.
I want to start by just for one, talkingabout how funny the process is.
I was ready to.
throw it all away and just give up ontrying to be a healthier person ever again
(00:27):
because my back was so jacked up.
Today I walked with my kids two and a halfmiles and I'm sitting here presenting my
podcast standing up because I don't have achair here.
There's not there's not a good sit downsituation here but I'm literally okay for
the first time standing up for more thantwo minutes at a time and that's on top of
(00:49):
having taken
a two and a half mile walk and done someintermittent HIIT workouts, I feel the
best I've felt in a long time.
So I kind of skipped ahead.
That's, I just, I'm so excited to feellike my body is actually something that is
helping me again, versus it beingsomething that is a hindrance and an
obstacle to everything I want toaccomplish in my life.
(01:10):
So I just want anybody who is dealing withthe darkness of being unfit or being in
pain.
to know that if you're doing the rightthings and you're showing up for yourself,
even when it's hard, it does pay off.
Now, today I feel amazing.
Tomorrow I might feel like crap again, butthis one day is the best day that I've had
(01:32):
in months.
And so it is totally worth it just for afeeling of remembering what it feels like
to actually move my body again.
So yeah, just keep trying.
The podcast has...
Really being, I mean, every, like all ofmy content creation has been kind of
taking a little bit of a backseat rightnow because for one, I was not doing a
(01:57):
good job of trusting the process.
I was trying to take everything back undermy control, things I had let go and given
to God.
And I was really enjoying life by trustinga higher power.
I had started to get scared and started toadd things back onto my plate.
Just grab one thing at a time and add itback onto my plate to where I was in this.
this chaos of scarcity so like I didn'treally know how to operate.
(02:21):
And I realized that I was doing this, Iwas stacking and I was like, you know
what, like I'm starting to put things backon my plate that I had been feeling so
much better knowing that I had given themto God and that they were things that I
can't control right now.
Like I can do the small steps, I can dowhat I can do, but trying to will myself
(02:42):
into.
more clients trying to will myself into ahouse that's not showing up, trying to
will myself into the perfect relationshipis not going to happen.
I have to let go of the result and show upevery day and just be confident that I'm
taking the right steps to build, build mydream life.
And so having pulled back, taken some timeto reassess and to just kind of reground
(03:08):
myself.
I feel so much better getting back into.
content creation today.
So I'm usually one who's all about likejust show up for yourself, push through,
push through, but the why has to be there.
You have to understand why you're showingup and why you're pushing through because
yes, on bad days, you have to show up foryourself because that's when you're going
to grow.
But if you don't remember why you'reshowing up, you don't remember what the
(03:31):
process that you're supposed to betrusting is, then you are doing what
exactly the title of this episode is, isyou're being inefficient.
by being impatient.
You are taking, you're getting so worriedabout the, the end of the process coming
to you sooner that you're wasting energy.
You're wasting time.
You're wasting all kinds of things bytrying to hurry up something that you
(03:54):
can't hurry up.
So cycle back a little bit.
Sorry.
I'm a little geeked up today.
I got the blood flowing energy going, but,as I said, let's just do our little, our,
our four domain check -in.
Body is feeling the best it has felt in along time.
I'm still standing right now.
Like that is something that would not havebeen happening a month ago.
(04:17):
So, well, I've already been pretty goodabout that.
So I'll move on to my being.
It's hard because I was not feeling asclose to God because I didn't realize that
I was hiding in that fear again.
I mean, this is something that I'm very,
(04:37):
open and saying is I'm scared a lot.
I'm trying not to get paralyzed by thatfear and I'm trying to stay on on target
and on focus to what I need to keep doingto keep taking small steps to building my
dream life.
It is easy to get impatient and try to hitthe home run and you end up striking out.
(04:57):
I don't want to strike out anymore.
I don't want to keep trying to take bigshots, you know.
Like I don't want to go all in every timeI sit down at the poker table and either
hit it big or lose all my chips becausemost of the time you lose all your chips.
And this has happened to me multiple timesand I'll talk about that more in a second.
So that's my body, that's my being.
Like right now I just need to show up andstop hiding from God because he already
(05:21):
knows my short fallings.
He already knows my fears and I just needto be truthful with myself so I can know
that he sees me.
I can feel seen and validated and heard.
and I can cleanse myself of those fearsand just walk in faith for him.
It's a very different feeling.
It doesn't mean that you're no longerscared.
(05:41):
It just gives you a strength to keepmoving.
My balance, things are going really goodwith Kate.
I just realized we've been on the road fora month and a half.
We have been without a home for a monthand a half.
It has happened so quickly, but it hasbeen truly amazing.
(06:01):
to like all the things I've taken my kidsto see, all the things that Kate has
accomplished that she said she would neverbe able to do, she's done and we have
grown closer together through all of that.
And I'm really thankful for this journeyfor giving us that.
Now, honestly, I would love to also findsome place to call home.
That is really, you know, really what iskind of weighing heavily on me right now
(06:23):
because this living from Airbnb to Airbnblife is not cheap.
I don't have any doubt that in the futuremoney will come, but I don't want money to
run out before we find some place that wecan call home and, you know, and start to
put down roots again.
So that is something that has been alittle bit challenging to work through,
(06:44):
but Kate and I have been really good atkind of taking turns as to being strong
for each other.
And that's like, that's a real partnershipfor me is that I can be vulnerable and I
can talk about whenever I'm struggling.
And she steps up and carries the weightfor me.
And today was one of those days where tostart the day, I was feeling really heavy
(07:05):
and I was really struggling with nottrusting the process and with, you know,
trying to bring the end result to me rightnow.
And she said, it's okay.
She was just there for me and, you know,and let me, you know, express my concerns
and heard me and saw me and validated meand let me get all that toxic crap out of
my brain.
And then I felt so much better.
(07:26):
It's so different whenever you have apartner that you're able to speak
truthfully to, and you don't have to putup a front.
When you're putting up a front, then youhave nowhere to turn whenever things are
tough.
You have nobody to talk to about whounderstands the truth of the predicament
you're in.
And that's a scary place.
That's a place that led to a lot ofdangerous things for me.
(07:47):
So body being balanced, and also thingswith the kids are going great.
They're going with my, you know,
Every time I go exercise, they go with meand we're having great walks and we're
having more experiences because I'm morephysically capable to do things.
And I'm more present because I'm lessworried about how I'm showing up for them.
And I'm just showing up for them.
And, you know, that's a lovely feeling.
(08:09):
And to just draw energy from thatrelationship is a really great experience
that I continue to feed into.
And it keeps feeding back into me andbusiness.
This is the one that continues to be astruggle because.
I'm a new business owner, like really likein all things, like in the scale of all
things, it's only been a little over ayear since I struck out on my own and it's
(08:30):
been less than six months and I reallysolidified who I'm trying to serve and
what I'm trying to do.
And so sometimes I doubt my ability to dowhat I do, even though my clients have all
seen the success of me doing what I do.
I just have trouble remembering thatsuccess.
I have trouble remembering.
that I am good enough.
(08:53):
I'm good enough for this and thateventually I'm gonna find my client base
that is going to allow me to do this fulltime without the fear of where the next
paycheck is gonna come from, without thefear of scarcity, without the fear of how
are we gonna pay for this place that we'retrying to live.
And I'll tell you what, the first stepthat I think that is gonna help drive me
there is being able to present like this.
(09:14):
Like I'm better at this.
Being able to be free in my body and likestand up.
Like this means I can go out to people andstart having conversations again and not
worrying about like, where can I sit down?
Where, you know, I need to make surethere's a place where I can be seated or
I'm not going to be able to like be atthat place.
This is, it's a game changer for me.
So physically being more fit has gotten memore excited about my business again.
(09:40):
Also like, you know, truth be told, nobodywants to take advice from a fat person.
you know, unless somebody's fatter thanme, then they might, but most people
aren't really keen on taking any kind ofadvice from somebody who looks like they
don't know what's going on in their body,which I do, you know, and I'm doing all
(10:00):
the things I can to take care of it.
So I'm not really concerned about whatthey think, but I know that perception and
I know that once I am, I am more fit andwell taken care of, it'll be, my appeal
will be much broader.
And so I'm really excited about thatbecause I see the growth happening.
I see where I'm starting to like, youknow, gain ground on that vision of me who
(10:25):
was this leader of people, this leader ofADHD parents who is bringing them along
and helping them see the success that I'veseen and, you know, feel the growth that I
felt.
So that's business.
Unfortunately, the truth of the businessis like, I need more clients.
I just do.
So I've been trying, like I try to, to setup a group thing and use Facebook ads.
(10:49):
And there was just a lot of noise andpeople who were not serious about like
improving their lives.
And I thought about doing it for a lowcost, I thought about doing it for no
cost.
And honestly, I'm just, I don't knowwhat's going on there.
I like, I haven't figured that part out,but like this free consultation game, I'm
really serious about, about just trying toget people in and have conversations with
(11:11):
them that changed their lives.
just one conversation to help their livesget better and then to work with them
moving forward if they like it, if theysee value in it, if they can make the
investment of themselves.
But being happy that I just got to make animpact on somebody through one call is the
(11:31):
goal right now to get more of those calls.
So all of this circles back around to...
You have to trust the process.
You have to, for one, you have to knowwhat your process is.
You have to know what the big pictureyou're driving towards is.
And then you have to like define the stepsthat you're taking and then just let go of
the result.
(11:52):
It's like if you were doing what you setforth, you are going to assess, you're
going to evaluate, but it's not about theresult.
It's about how you're about, you know,looking at the process as it goes and how
effective it is being.
And sometimes if you're working on thingslike me and my back, I had to just trust
that it was going to work because youcan't tell from day to day how much less
(12:15):
pain it is sometimes.
Sometimes you just have to trust that it'sgoing to work.
And you know, in the big part of that, Ididn't understand before, you know, the
past few months of learning how to trustthe process is that whenever you tell the
truth and whenever you're truly open andvulnerable about the process you're
developing,
then God enters that process.
(12:37):
And it is like whenever you can't figureout the answer, that answer is God.
And that is what I felt is like wheneveryou just show up and do the steps, God is
going to help get you to where you'retrying to go.
And I have so much trouble trusting thatin business because I don't know why.
(12:58):
Like business and God are not somethingthat I've felt like have matched in the
past, but.
I know that it's true because God is allthings.
So God is my body.
God is my relationship with my wife and mykids.
God is my relationship with myself.
Why would God not be my business as well?
So it's something that I have to stoptrying to rush and be more patient with
(13:23):
because whenever I stop being patient,whenever I stop trusting the process, I
waste money, I waste time, I waste energy,I waste resources, and it's silly.
So that is the overall goal of this wholeprocess is trust the process and don't be
so much in a rush that you're beinginefficient.
I'm gonna keep it short because I wanna goback and hang out with my family because
(13:44):
it's been a great day and I wannacontinue.
That is it for today.
I will talk to you next week on AuthenticOn Air.
Thank you so much for listening and alsoif you would like to have a free
consultation call where I promise I willgive you at least three strategies or
techniques that will help improve yourlife today.
then please go to www .impulsive .lifeforward slash consult and get free, like a
(14:07):
free one hour call in which I will giveyou those techniques based specifically
off of the situations and the strugglesthat you are going through right now.
It says for ADHD parents and I am reallylooking to help change some lives and help
to see the same growth I've seen in mine.
So I'll talk to you guys later, bye.
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