444pm Drop in Sundays Adult Autism Conversation Open to All EP37

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
AutisticRadio.com (00:00):
We speak our words, we listen, we speak our words, we listen.
We speak our words.
We listen.
We speak our words.
We listen.

Jules-AutisticRadio.com (00:18):
Hi there.
Every Sunday a group of autisticpeople get together and drop in.
It's an informal group.
But some of the things that peoplesay deserve a bigger audience,
so they give us permission for usto put them in a an edited reel.
And that's what we are here for today'sedited reel of the conversations

(00:40):
that we have about our own autism.
Cheers, enjoy.
Two autistic people travelingoff to South America together.
So I think it's quite normal forthe autistic sensibility to think
of all the different go wrong kind,

Raymond-AutisticRadio.com: which part of south. (01:00):
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They're

Jules-AutisticRadio.com: going off to Peru. (01:02):
undefined

Raymond-AutisticRadio.com (01:04):
Hi.
The right place at the right time.

Jules-AutisticRadio.com: We've got gr joining us. (01:06):
undefined
Gr we met when we did a recording.
I'm doing a an edit for a podcast.
They're somebody who's really intomusic and they also were interviewed,
so they did a bit of advocacy.
So, uh, we invited them to come anddrop in and, and join in with everybody.
And that's what.
Alright.
Thanks for catching me up.
I wasn't sure if they, but Reginaand you were talking to, I was like,

Nicola-AutisticRadio.com (01:31):
what's all this?

It feels a little bit like being the host at
a party, trying to make sure thateverybody's comfortable and saying, oh,
this person's coming in, or that person.
Hi, Lucy's coming in.
Hi, Lucy.

Hi.
Yeah, yo.
Hi, Lucy Hila.

Hi.
Welcome.
To the village shop.

Yeah,
Jules, it's like, it is, I quite like it.
The idea of like you being like the hostof a party, because there's times before
I've really appreciated it when you'veexplained my jokes, um, to everyone.
You'll be like I feel like normallyI say my jokes and nothing happens.
And then you're like, Nicola,I told an autistic joke.
I feel like I would do bettersocially if I had somebody like you.

(02:11):
Shut me around.

It's like having a personal voiceover in
the background, but it also soundsa bit like mansplaining as well.
So I'm always in two minds as towhether I'm being helpful or whether
I I'm being a pain, you know,

Raymond-AutisticRadio.com: designated translator. (02:24):
undefined

Yeah, like I feel like it's more like the narrator and

Raymond-AutisticRadio.com: are we in the, at this party, (02:29):
undefined
at parties?

Now we have to explain what Christopher
references because the people inthe United States might not be,
um.
Oh, I see.
Sorry.
That's probably my job to do that then.
Yeah, so Christopher Robin is the childwho, uh, is in control of all the toys
in AA Mills Poo, which Winnie the pooover in the United States and Canada and

(02:56):
New Zealand or all these other places.
I'm not sure how common it is.
I've seen it in bookshops inthese different countries.
But yeah, I'm Christopher Robin, whichmeans I'm probably an eight boy explaining

thank you.
I was like taking a little moment there.
'cause I went off and I wonder becauseI, I think that there has been like
a, a Disney film on, or Pixar orsomething like that quite recently.
So I think it'll be global.
I'm not sure.

Wow.
This mushroom pizza's really good.

I'm just gonna jump in and be this
comment that's in the chat.
I have the kitten.
Unfortunately the camera isn'tworking on my laptop tonight.
Oh, this is exciting.
She

kitten.
She has

Lucy-AutisticRadio.com (03:33):
arrived.

I'm not gonna tempt you to squeeze the
kitten so it makes a meowing sound.

She's actually fast asleep next to me at the moment.
Yeah, we've had a, we'vehad a lovely couple of days.
I'm covered in scratches.
Which means it's all working really well.
Mama Cat.
Mama Cat.
Hi gi.
Thank you.
There were a few bumps along the way.
Sorry,

Gary, uh, or gr did you mention that you did
extensive traveling when you were fallingThe Rolling Stones around on tour?

GR-Gary-AutisticRadio.com (04:01):
First I went west with San Francisco and
the furthest I went east was Berlin.

Yeah, because travel comes up a lot in our
discussions about whether or not.
Autistic people havedifficulties with travel or not.

Yeah, it's the only, I only for the rolling stones.
I used to dream, that'show I coped to be honest.
They didn't send you a limousine?
No,
I flew with the crew to Spain in 1999.
I was behind Mick Jagger on
the plane.
How?
Actually, I, I was in the, um, depart.

(04:36):
I was in the airport and he walked pastme and been a hero of mine for years.
And, um, I, as I say, my copingmechanism was drinking and I was
actually on my way to the loop,so I went as quickly as I could.
And when I came back out, I wentand walked around and found him.
So I went up to him and very quietlyI said, excuse me, is this a bad

(04:58):
time to ask for an autograph?
And he looked quitesurprised and he said, no.
And so I handed him mypassport and he signed it.
And I was just blathering around,you know, like a fan saying I I've
waited 21 years to this moment.
And he said, wow.
And I said, I've seen everyshow on this tour except for.
He said fantastic.

(05:18):
And then he handed hispassport back to me.
He handed my passport back to me andhe held out his hand to shake my hand
and he said, have a safe journey.
And then when I got on the plane, he, Isaw him walk down the aisle and he sat
in front of me, but I'd had my moment.
I mean, he was with his son,it was his private time.
I'd already taken up his timeafter he signed my passport.

(05:38):
I went to the, it was, um, I, itwas just a per, it was perfect.

Yeah.
Even when you, me, that said no.
Almost heard in his accent.

Yeah.
I mean.
I mean, they say Don't meet your heroes.
And the thing is that he, um, it was hisprivate time and he was with his son.
But, um, yeah, he was nice.
I mean, I've met so many, um,through following stones around,
uh, I met Brian Adams once I.
I met, um, Jude Law at a show once.

(06:12):
But, uh, I mean, I said helloto Keith Richards once I met
Ronnie Wood very briefly.
Charlie Wats had a, a a strangeconversation with him after he'd done
big with his, uh, boogie Woogie band.
I said hello to Mick Taylor, who wastheir second guitarist once, so I've met
them all except, um, Brian Jones and Imet most of their backing people, uh,

(06:33):
singers and keyboard players, et cetera.

Raymond-AutisticRadio.com: You met Mick Taylor. (06:36):
undefined
He was my favorite.

Yeah, he, um, I he was walking off stage.
I said, hello, Mick.
He just smile at me.
Because I had friends with a guy
name in.
Um, played on, yeah,
I mean, swell.

(07:00):
Seminal punk band.
The song called Read About Seymour,which is reputed to be where
Blur got their original band lanefrom because they were Seymour.
And there's a, a gorilla's video whereyou see a guy, one of the animated
characters wearing a swell maps t-shirt.
So they were obviously fans.
Thi Moore is a big of, uh, swells.

(07:21):
I heard that story
about swell maps.
Yeah.
About, um, about Blur and, uh, Seymour.
So

Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I know about that.
Yeah.

I mean, um, I've the Swell Maps sort of led me to
the No man who did the Autism Man songbecause they were big Swell Maps fans
and they've done some recordings withUhhow Head, another member, and also, um.
He was a member of Swell Maps.
It's all,
uh, it's all connected.
It's all, um, like I say, when, whenI saw the Rolling Stone on top of

(07:57):
the, in 1978, it changed my life.
It really did.

Who was.

I saw people that were putting that their different
fame to fame, you know, tiny bits thatthey were with or alongside some famous
people, somebody put about Jude Law.
And GR was talking aboutthe Rolling Stones.
Mark Strong's an actor he'sbeen in various things.
Often playing some quite nasty roles, butI couldn't tell you which films he's in.

(08:27):
He's

Raymond-AutisticRadio.com: in the first Shazam movie. (08:27):
undefined
I think you find My school's famousat Irv Welsh attended it, which was
like three or four years above me,so I didn't see him or anything.

Yeah, I I, I do always have a story.
Um, Jude Law was at Rolling Stone'sconcert with, um, Sienna Miller.
Two, sat two rows behind me andturned around and pointed to Jude
and, uh, Sienna gave him an elbow.
And I, I said to him, um, how, howmuch I admired, um, the film Sky

(08:58):
Captain in the world of tomorrow.
And he was, he was quite humble.
Seemed quite nice.
I wish I'd actually spoken toSienna Miller because she'd just
done a movie about Ed Sedgwick.
And, uh, it's all tied up in thatAndy Warhol Velvet Underground period.
And I wish I'd, I wish I'dspoken to her a bit about that.
Really,

I think you do well in the Embrace Autism group.
I attend every Wednesday, Gary, whichis just strangely all men, apart
from one woman who's one of the,um, what's the word, presenters.
Yeah.
And so when the lads startgetting into the record
collections, it gets a bit wild.

Yeah.
I mean, I could thing I always say topeople that, 'cause I was into horror and
science fiction films and TV and books.
Before I was into music and I'mstill into all those things.
And I often say to people that ifif I'd applied my brain to science
and not music and films that we'd,we'd have clean, sustainable energy

(09:55):
now and we'd all be going around andflying cars, but I decided it was more
important knowing who the directorof the 1922 version of was and who
played a per on the Rolling Stones.
It's only rock roll sessions, but go.

It does seem to be that list making quality.
I've always wondered why as an artisticperson or autistic people in general,
perhaps wanna consume popular culture.
It's there, it's convenientand it's quite, tasty.
But, um,

(10:35):
there's a bit of.

I think

it's,

I mean, I have lists and uh, like I've got
a list of all the horror and sciencefiction films that are coming out over
the next seven years by release date.
And, um, but the day I used to, usedto, uh, I've been in a few quiz teams.
And always done well.
And years ago, I, I used to, um, Iused to call quiz machines in pubs.

(10:59):
I used to call 'em cashpoint machinesbecause I could, I could just go in and
once I got the hang of how the machineoperated I could just literally empty it.

Raymond-AutisticRadio.com: What like a fruit machine? (11:09):
undefined
'cause my friend was good at that.
It just used to monitorits usage and then step in.

You.
One night I went outadmittedly this was 1990s.
I went out with 20 pence pieceto the pub at seven o'clock and I
came home at half past 11, drunkwith five pounds in my pocket.
And one night I took42 pounds out of a mil.
One night I empty million at 35 pounds,and then they unplugged the machine.

(11:35):
Two pound outta it.
I'm going back 25 years.
So it was quite a lot of money and um,people in the pub would come up to me and
say, here's 20 P, what can you do with it?
I'd walk off one night, thisguy says, here's 20 P, you are
so good on the quiz machine.
Do something with it.
So I walked off and I literally cameback a minute later and he said,
well, that's 20 pence piece wasted.

(11:56):
And I gave him one pound, 20.
So I time,
every 10 seconds his moneywas, uh, was increased.
It's, um, and people saidlike, why don't you go on?
Who wants to be a millionaire?
But or on quiz shows.
But the thing is it just seems.
Like I, I do it for fun.
And it just seems a bit Toryto use that sort of knowledge

(12:20):
for money making like that.
I know it sounds tough.
When I was on the Stones tour and I endedup working for them and I started to get
really uncomfortable, I was doing merch.
I started to get really uncomfortablebecause that was my hobby and now it
was something I was making money out of.
And it was like my relationshipwith the music had changed and

(12:40):
I wasn't comfortable with that.
I mean, I did merch for, um, usher atone point and I had no problem with that.
'cause I didn't really, musicdidn't, it wasn't my music.

I used to do merch from bands as well.
Gr.
I've got to say I agree with you becauseit does fundamentally, especially
if you really like the band, it doesfundamentally change the way you see it.
'cause you're looking it from the inside.
And so the experience isvery different and it's work.
That's the thing.
And it, it feels uncomfortableto be working, doing the
thing that you usually love.
Just being at.

(13:11):
Um, so yeah, I understand that one.

Yeah, I mean, the, the people I was working
for the, there was, they offeredme, um, they offered me a few things
and I just wasn't really interested.
And, um, but it got to a point if itwas gonna be a big show and there was
gonna be a lot of money, we used tobe stood outside selling posters for.

(13:35):
You wouldn't get the call becausethey would keep those ones themselves.
But and the last one they, theyoffered me and then they never rang
back, was just up the road from it,Broadlands, it was, uh, busted and um.
And, uh, they said, yeah, turn up.
And then, uh, one of the guys who didgo, said to me, well, they decided

(13:56):
there was more, they wanted to keepthem up themselves, but I, I'm the
man as well that turned down Donna,because they said, would you do Madonna?
And I said, well, okay.
And, but they wanted me to driveto London, pick up the posters.
Then drive up to Liverpool,get a ferry over to Dublin, and
the gig was at slain Castle.
Do the gig, and thendrive all the way back.

(14:17):
And, um, they just seemedlike a lot of hassle.
Um, I mean, my, my travel expenseswould've been paid, but I would've
only got the money I made atthe gig, which might be like
50 or 60 quid if I was lucky.
So I turned on her down.
I'm sure she did.
Without
these

things.
Felt as though you werebit more part of it.
If you were like, I know even doingthe car parking or security or litter
picking or being one of the green atGlastonbury, I remember my daughter did
a running and of the entertainment and.
It felt as though she was workingthere and she had a group of buddies

(14:59):
that were all in the know, if behindthe scenes backstage and all that.
So yeah, what you aresaying surprises me a bit.

Well, there was a local project here, the set a cinema in
the local village hall, uh, once a month.
And I went onto that.
They got me in 'cause I'd worked inmarketing and, and they had me doing
marketing, which is right, pressreleases and making sure posters
were stuck up in the local shops.
And, um, the thing about thatwas when we did the first one

(15:27):
it was clear that the audience.
Was over 60.
So it was Gray Market, graypan, and they never showed film
that I actually wanted to see.
Well, there were two films that theyshowed, which were films I would actually
want to see, but other than that, theynever showed a film that I, I was even
remotely interested in, so I didn't mind.
Setting up the room andscreens and all that, it,

(15:51):
it didn't bother me because the filmsdidn't matter and, and sometimes
I would go down in the evenings tomake sure the hall was all okay.
And as soon as the film started, I wasoff over to the local, um, multiplex to
see whatever that week's release was.
And horror has got a.
A bit more respectable now, but, um, Imean, horror films were always considered,

(16:15):
uh, sort of next to pornography really,and science fiction until, um, oh, until
just after Star Wars science fictionwas considered to be for children.
Wasn't considered an adultfilm genre despite things like

two.
Um,
in my land.
And the fact of thematter is it's just work.
And, um, so yeah, you're kind ofin, but they're long days and hiring
days and, you know, I didn't getpaid a heck of a lot for what I did.
Um, mean, and I, I alsodid one time a day,

(16:59):
one.
Within that, and I wasjust knackered by it.
It was, you know, it would be, itwould be lovely if you felt like
there was some sort of, but by theend of it, you, you just cannot
stand the sight of everybody else.
You want to go home and go to bed.
So yeah, you're kind of in, butat the same time it you realize
that a job is a job as a job.

I think even the bands hate that treadmill.

Yeah.
I mean, a lot people forget that.
I mean, I, I follow a lot of, um, I neverused to follow a lot of artists that were
sort of off the radar, smaller indie bandswho were playing small venues, but a lot
of people, I do more now, but a lot ofpeople don't realize that, um, for every,
uh, rolling Stones and Taylor Swift.

(17:41):
There's, um, there's four people jumpingin the back of a van driving miles and
basically not earning any money outta it.
It's, um, it's not all, uh,glitz and glam and the crews.
I think stones treat theircrews relatively well.
I. But, um, most of the crews, I, Ithink it's just, I mean, if you've
you know, you turn up, you set all thestaging up, you might get a couple of

(18:04):
hours off, the band is finished, thenyou take down the staging and then you
pack it away, and then a few hours later,you're in the next town, next venue.
You setting it all up again.
It's hard work.

Yeah, it is.
And um, and I found I was working fromsort of two o'clock in the afternoon
to two o'clock in the morning andthen getting onto a sleeper coach
and then waking up at maybe about10 o'clock and then, you know, going
around again and doing it again.
And in all this, you've also gottaremember I'm doing sort of t-shirt
counting and, and making sure nothing getsnicked and you know, and really being in

(18:37):
charge of that store by myself then doingall the, all the stuff afterwards where.
The people I was working for.
So
it was just tiring.
And I like gr.
I used to use alcohol a lot for nervesand for the socialization thing, so
I can kind of relate to that bit too.

Yeah.
Also, if you are one T-shirt short andthey couldn't work out where it was, I
bet they docked that out of your pay.
'cause um, when I did the posters for, um,usher, there was counting posters up again
and again and again because there weretwo or three they couldn't account for.
And, um, one time on the stones,uh, these lithographs we were

(19:17):
selling at the Stones gigs.
These were arc quality lithographs.
They were like 70 or $80 each.
And there was, there were one shorton stock, and, uh, so that meant
that we would all lose the moneyout of our wages to cover the $80.
Turned out one of the guys had actuallygiven some, given someone a litho, one
of the guys who was actually in charge.

(19:38):
But, um, yeah, we were sat there likewe were criminals because of one litho.

I used to be able to be a bit creative
anyway with my accounting becauseI did it all on paper at the end.
You know, I, I tend, I maybe shouldbe admitting this out loud, but
maybe I, I might have fluffed afew of the figures to make it look
a bit better than it actually was.
But I mean, you know, really difficultwhen there's only one of you on a big
stool and something just gets liftedbecause, you go away feeling terrible

(20:03):
that you hadn't done your job properly,but honestly they're expecting you to do
an awful lot on, on very little sleep.
Yeah, I

mean, the guy usher, which is the Stones
thing was a whole different setup.
But when I did the Russia and we hadtwo different sorts of posters and um.
So you'd put the two posters onthe ground and then every time
someone bought one, you'd pick itup, roll it up and hand it to them.
And I said to the guys, I said,we're sat around doing nothing.
Why don't we roll the posters up now andthen when people buy it, you can just

(20:35):
put two single posters on the ground.
Then when you buy them, you just.
At the time on the transaction, itmakes everything easier for everyone.
And, um, they sent someone off to buybags of rubber bands and we did that.
And, um, it just seemed like asimple thing they hadn't thought of.

You do get a latitude sort of to, to maybe make a
few differences to the way you do thingsand you, you kind of organize it to
your own sort of comfort in the end.
Uh, and, and I really didn'thave anybody else helping me.
The only person.
Hang around a bit, but you know, Ididn't, I would just do it to my, so I
would find little shortcuts and ways tomake it easier for myself, especially

(21:12):
if I was doing a big venue, like I wouldplay, uh, we would play the, um, Astoria
in London in Central London, which had ahuge capacity and I was the only person
man in the merch, so I had to get just so

yeah.
Do.
11
years ago I went to quite a traumaticpart of my life and, uh, I say to
people, I reverted to factory settings.
So all the years of learning socialthings and interacting with people, I
just went back to factory settings and.

(21:47):
A couple of years after that, that wasdiagnosed as autism, but I wouldn't, um,
I, um, I, I went to see the stones inHyde Park in 2022 and I took some selfies
and, um, and, uh, I, when I put them onFacebook, I said I had a face that looked
like I'd been slapped with a wet fish.
I really did look unhappy and miserable.

(22:09):
Packed in there.
They, they're one of the fewbands that I would do that for.

Yeah, I, um, I went through a, a period of time where I,
I, I was quite mute in social situations.
For me, um, I mean, I've said this before,but I know you're not, you're new to
this GII was, I was, um, late diagnosedor like discovered I guess when I.
I'm 51 now, so I've only hada very limited amount of time

(22:34):
where I've known about this.
But you know, I, looking back, I can seethe patterns and the things that I used
to do that, that are, are signs of autism.
So yeah, it's, it's, I, I too would goback to factory sentencing times and just
not be able to do the, the going out.
I'm a bit bit like that now, to be honest.
I don't like to at all now.

(22:54):
I preferred my own companyand keeping my own council.

Yeah, I was 53.
And, uh, I, um, I give all credit to mymother who was always there and supported
me and helped me and, and the traumaticincident in my life was when she passed
away, when, when I was 50, and I.
All my life.
And once that was gone,that was my safety net.

(23:19):
No matter what happened, I knew Icould, my home was here and she was
here, and that support was there.
With my father who died 33
years ago, uh, with myfather, I would say he was.
My father was, I think years went pastwhen my father and I never even spoke.

(23:40):
And it was not because of any, ananimosity, he just didn't speak to anyone.
And when we'd go to family gatheringsor, or when we'd visit the relatives,
'cause my, my parents both came fromlarge families and he would sit in the
car, he wouldn't even want to come inand he would just sit in the car for.
His thing was gardening and, um,both my parents were farm people

(24:01):
and, uh, in the back garden here,when my father was physically
active, it was just all vegetables.
It was just incredible.
He, he could just grow anything.
That was his thing.

Okay, I just wanna make a timely reminder
for people taking part in thefour by 4 4 4, um, choices here.
If you are speaking out loud.
You can either have your whole, of yourtrack, whatever you say, removed so that
it doesn't appear when we put it out asa podcast, or you can have it included.
So if you say personal things,now you have to make a decision at

(24:36):
the end of this, whether you wantto put these things out or not.
And that might change howfar you go into things.
Okay.

Yeah,

I've,

I've, um, I've got no problem with that.

It seems like you've been through a lot
gl uh, with that I understand.
Uh, and I've lost both my parents quitesomewhat after one another, and it does
feel like you lose that support thatsort of line to somebody who can kind of
look after and, and shelter you a bit.
So it makes you feela little bit more like

GR-Gary-AutisticRadio.com: you're a little bit more exposed. (25:13):
undefined
I.
There's the, uh, the film a LakeDiscovery, which, um, I can't remember
if you were on the discussion on Monday,but, um, there's a film I did with
some students called a Lake Discovery.
It's all in there.
It's, um, yeah, it's, it's an open wound.
I also had the council told me when mymother died, I'd been made homeless.
I lived.
That was years and years.
That's nearly five years of that.
And um, it's, I'm

(25:45):
here.
And there were times whenI didn't think I'd make it.
I'm not gonna go, I don'twanna go further than that.
'cause it might betriggering to some people.

Lucy-AutisticRadio.com: Absolutely understand. (25:54):
undefined
And thank you for sharing.
Yeah.

GR-Gary-AutisticRadio.com: I. There's the old gag. (25:57):
undefined
Uh, I'm just trying to think where at, Ithink of Hitchhiker's guy to the galaxy.
Yeah.
It was deep thought, wasn't it?
He said there was some computer, it couldtalk hin legs off of a donkey, but I could
persuade it to walk afterwards and, um,I can talk, I could do it as an Olympic
sport, especially about films and music.

(26:17):
That's

really funny.

I just want to bring in something from the text.
Raymond says.
Your experience was like being uprooted.
I think that's a veryinteresting metaphor for that.
Or similarly, he used the word like,

yeah, I mean, I would, my mother was
probably, she probably had a DHD.
She was obsessed with housework.
She kept the house uptogether all the time.
And, um, when she came out of hospitalwith a terminal diagnosis, I think
she just came home to, uh, makesure that I knew what I needed to
do in the house so that I'd be okay.

(26:52):
And also my mother met quite a fewcelebrities and um, but she never
said anything about, every oncein a while a story would pop up
and, um, I'll be honest with you,if they, of their self-importance,
um.
Yeah.
Very funny stories when she, butshe would never say anything.

(27:12):
One day she, we'd be watching TV andshe'd say, Hmm, I'm not that Sean Connery.
And then the story wouldpop out as she met.
Sean Connery didn't gowell, she met Mick Huck.
That didn't go well,

but there you go.
All
the ears in Graces.
Okay, I'm just gonnapop you on mute for a.
So that you get into the idea ofbeing mute and not being mute, and
sometimes we take a few minutes so thatanybody who is out there who hasn't
been in the conversation gets theopportunity to join in their own time.

Harry-AutisticRadio.com (27:47):
Well, good evening everybody and
Justin's discussion today.

Asking, is the music allowed in the background?
Sorry, but are you asking if you'vegot music in your background?
I can't hear anything.
Harry.

Yes.
Uh, it's caused the deeperdownstairs about music.
I'm just wondering if it's goingto interfere with the sound.
It's not that bad.
It's just that, because Iknow the microphone sensitive.

Hey mate.
I had a nice green van chime inonce when I was speaking to you.

Well, there has been a couple of times where
we've had conversations and I've beenhearing kinda, you know, background
noises because this sounds so good.
I keep thinking it's my ownarea just to realize and the
person stops speaking and they
mute.
It's to somewhere else.
And I can remember one time thinkJules uh, went and walked away to get
a cup of tea or something and didn'tgo and mute, uh, which was unusual.

(28:37):
And uh, when they came back,
I heard this hum hum thum.
I thought somebody wascoming into my living room.
I don't really like that.
Well, I mean, I thought somebody wasactually walking in my house because
the sound was, that's been good.
So
yeah,

I've been in Zoom meetings where people, you can hear
people having fights themselves in their.

Harry-AutisticRadio.com: Well, I can recall that (28:55):
undefined
there were times, years agowhere it was one of the Zoom
meetings that ever happened.
People weren't used to it, andit was like a couple were at this
meeting, you know, itwas like housing meeting.
And I
think what happened is they weretalking about someone at the meeting.
They said something or made a mistakeor whatever, but they left the mute off

(29:19):
and they heard them and it caused such abig fallout, I imagine them being there.
So there's a lot to learnwith things like that.
And you get people that used to comein with a tailies on and thought
that's normal, the tell on in thebackground, but it's that sensitive.
I remove a clock in the livingroom because it ticks and I've got
air freshener things that can, uh,
automatic

(29:44):
is off every 10 minutes.
So I remove that from the room whileI'm recording or while I'm speaking
on here because I sensitive I ifother people hear it, but I hear it.
So it seems everybody else can.

I used to visit a relative every Sunday, and I would only
go if they agreed to switch off the rearfreshener because when it used to jet
out while I was sitting there, it usedto freak me out and I used to go into a
kind of weird reaction because of the.
Yeah, I knew I was going to get abad reaction in my nose and throat to
the stuff, so that's when it began tobe apparent that there was something

(30:19):
going on with me, because I was moaningabout smells in people's houses.

Yeah, I get you.
I've only had this sortof thing I recently.
But I can remember like being in someone
else's house, not realizing they've gotit, and then this kind of noise happens.
You're going, what is that noise?
Sometimes it's not even that.
Sometimes it's just even noise, just
like phones going off or bleepingor just something like that.
It's like it kind of throws you,but if you're not used to it.

(30:44):
But then with the freshobviously gives off a smile,
and if you're not used to that.

I lived in a little village, really little
village, not so very long ago.
And the worst part about livingthere, and I did actually move, was
I lived next to a church which hada clock tower and it would chime
every hour, morning, noon night,midnight, one o'clock in the morning.
And I hated it so much.

(31:14):
It drove me around the bend.
I ended up moving here because.

Yeah, Jules, should you have, uh, new data?
'cause I can recall some ofthat happening in some kind of
broadcast that we've had in the

past.
He may be away, helping outwith the Trump fire brigade.

Yeah.
But, uh, it a time where I stayed in a,and it was right next to the cathedral.
And it wasn't like a clock thing,but I was there for a weekend.
So Sunday morning I had a nice week andOng to see the mass was starting and my
bed room was right next to that side.

(31:52):
So yeah, I get it.
But.
Obviously if it's something that happensregular basis, it's somewhere where you
live, that would be quite, discomforting.
Absolutely.
Especially if it did itat midnight and all that.
I didn't realize that that happened.
I thought, I don't know why Ithought, but I thought when it
got till certain times at night,
and obviously during the night,that it wouldn't do that till a

(32:19):
certain time.
Six 10,

I

suppose.

Stop.
That's what I thought.
There'd be like an embargo having massive,
it's.
Strong
thing.
It is like number one,uh, it keeps you awake.
And number two, it reminds you ofthe hours going past in your life.

(32:43):
And I know that sounds weird, but itwas really, it's like, it's like this,
just like counting down every hour.
I have to, 'cause I couldhear it from work as well.
Uh, I, I, I found that it,it just really gotta me.

Well,
that's the thing.
Yeah, because it's, it'sthe measurement of time.
So if you hear that, you knowthat an hour's passed or if for 15
minutes or whatever it, it does.
So I, I totally get that.
Because even though they say people areartistic, obsessed with time, it's more
scheduling than time I would think.
And you don't want to remembered ofevery measurement of the time you.

(33:16):
Lost and just living, and thencheck the time when you need to.
So I totally get that.

I remember trying to read the Sundial at one of
our local parks, was walking the dogs.
It took me a while to figure it out,you know, it's like not instinctive
anymore to follow the sun, is it?
Especially when it's dull,

it's
gonna be really boring.
And talk about my cat.
She's called Jessie and she has been,this has absolutely been the light
of my life for the last three days.
It's been just her and her and her,and she's really, I, I've been feeling
really terrible over Daisy goingand I, and you know, and that's.

(33:55):
Not being in my life hasbeen really bad for me.
So having a new animal has actuallyreally made me feel better, um, having
this soul in the house, relying on.
And she right next, right now.
So yeah.
This is her now.
Um, so she's gonna, and I,I think you, thanks, Reja.
I do feel mellow.

(34:15):
I see you putting text that I say mellow.
I feel it because, um, it's allstarting to come back to me now.
I'm starting to have somewhere whereI can put those emotions again.
It's really good for me.

Raymond-AutisticRadio.com: You're making me think. (34:28):
undefined
My dog is inherited from her.
She began to accumulate animals.
You know, it was amenagerie after a while.
There were rats, there weregers, there were various rodents.
There was five dogs at one point.
She never had cats, good birds.

(34:48):
Uh, so.
I'm not saying it becomes anaddiction or anything, but some
people are very tied into animals.
And, uh, it can get,it can become a thing.
Yeah, it's a thing.
And, uh, it's a wonderful thing.

Lucy-AutisticRadio.com: It's an emotional thing. (35:02):
undefined
That's the thing.
For me it's just been an emotionalthing, having her and, you know,
I, I just feel, and I feel like I'mresponsible as well, which really helps.
She's filled a little hole.
But I, I, one at a time with animalswith me, apart from when I had my budgets
and they just br like wildfire and Ihad loads of them, but, um, it's one

(35:24):
at a time for me because I don't reallyhave the energy for more than one.
But yeah, she's great.
So far she's great.

Raymond-AutisticRadio.com: Yeah, tropical fish can (35:30):
undefined

Lucy-AutisticRadio.com: become too much as well. (35:32):
undefined
My dad had tropical fish and mybrother broke the tank by accident.
When they were on holiday, my momand dad were on holiday and my
dad had this big tropical fishtank, um, on the upstairs landing.
And my brother had decided he wasgonna go into the loft, which just
happened to be above the tank.
This is many moons ago decades.
And he went up.

(35:53):
And he pushed up the, the loft lidand it fell and it hit the fish
tank, which broke, and then thewhole of the top floors flooded.
All the fish died.
It was my dad's pride and joy.
And he phoned me up in apallet where I was living.
I had to go and clean it all up for him.
So yeah, we went offtropical fish after that,

I.
Sometimes they not voluntarily.
They just sort of appear in your headsometimes and they're quite sore.
So they're obviously old woundsthat you have kinda opened up
again for some weird reason.

Lucy-AutisticRadio.com: Yeah, that one's big. (36:30):
undefined
'cause my dad was gonna walkthrough the door and I, and, uh, I
think I've, I've probably kind of
explained what my dad was like.
Yeah, the, the big sort of controllingautistic father that he was thinking
about him walking through the doorand seeing, uh, a lot of broken
glass and a lot of dead fish.
Yeah, that was the dread of course.

(36:53):
Yes.
Thank you, Raymond.
The dread, uh, he said on
the, but yeah.
Thing about once your father comes home,
I.
Controlling.
I

Raymond-AutisticRadio.com: see that time's up. (37:04):
undefined
Just the ladies know.
Speaking of time there ju

Jules-AutisticRadio.com: how are we doing guys? (37:10):
undefined
Is that us for today?
Yeah.
We're just finished.
I noticed it.
That was good.
My name is in

the chat.

Jules-AutisticRadio.com: What's that about? (37:15):
undefined

Oh, it's just about the chains.
So the A
church or a clock.
We're just talking about howLucy lives somewhere where it
was every 15 minutes, every.
It would chime and then it'd

be quite, it'd be, quite staggering
because it's still loud.
It's 5.
44 now, so our drop in hour is finished,and thank you to all the people who
have texted, and also to the peoplewho have put their voices to this,
that are going to allow us to put someof those words out into the podcast.
If you join us here at the 444, your voiceisn't recorded, your text isn't recorded,

(37:56):
but the people here have given permission,so that it's an example for others.
See you again.
Always.
Reliably.
Sunday.
444pm.
Cheers guys.

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