June 27, 2025 • 27 mins
"Celebrating Uniqueness, Empowering Every Mind"
"Empowering Neurodivergent Lives with Products Designed for You"
Kelsey is discovering her Autistic Identity as an adult. She is using her enterprise to connect with the community. Its a small business and a big labour of love integral to her newly developing Autistic Identity.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
AutisticRadio.com (00:03):
We speak our words, we listen, we speak our words, we listen.
We speak our words.
We listen.
We speak our words.
We
Jules-AutisticRadio.com (00:18):
listen.
Hello everybody, thank you forlistening again to Autistic Radio.
We have a lot of differentthings that we do here.
One of those is looking to give voice toAutistic people , who are making a change,
making a difference, or have somethingto say about how Autism is in this world.
(00:41):
Kelsey.
Kelsey has produced The Calm Crate.
The Calm Crate?
Sounds like a bargainfor families out there.
It sounds like a bargain forthose of us who like to change
our stim toys from time to time.
Wear them out.
Stim toys to calm ourselvesin certain situations.
(01:04):
Hello, Kelsey.
Let me introduce you today.
Kelsey-Kind-Crate (01:10):
Hi, Jules.
Jules-AutisticRadio.com (01:11):
Hi.
Well, we've got, um, Harry over there inone of the studios and Ray is probably
going to join us in a few moments.
While we're waiting for allthat, can you tell me about how
you discovered your own autism?
Kelsey-Kind-Crate (01:26):
Of course.
So, I was diagnosed with severaldifferent things when I was in my 20s.
There was a lot of depression, anxiety,bipolar, just lots of different
things that never felt fitting.
(01:49):
And the medication that I was given,
And every couple of months I would go backto my GP and I would say, I don't think
this antidepressant is working anymoreand they would just give me another one.
And when I had originally asked thepsychology people I was under, you know,
(02:15):
I, I think I'm autistic and I think Imust have been about 24 or 25 at this age.
And I said to them, Ithink I'm autistic and.
I could see them kind of look andsay, you, you're so well spoken and,
(02:36):
you know, you almost have a degree innursing and, you know, you go out and
you do things, you're not autistic.
And then we left it at that.
And then when I was 27, I reached.
back to that topic becauseI was struggling in work
(02:58):
with burnout continuously.
Noise was unbearable all the time and I'dhad to drop my hours quite significantly.
So I'd went from 37 and a halfto 30 to 22 and a half and that
(03:18):
was to, to manage my burnout.
And I got a differentpsychologist this time.
And we'd done a, a small, smallquiz before we'd done a, the
official autism diagnosis tool.
And she sat with me and I answered herquestions and she just kind of looked
(03:41):
at me and was like, we've got thiswrong, you're definitely autistic.
And at that moment, I kind of felt,
I felt.
Like, yeah.
I, I felt like I didn'tfit in with the world.
(04:05):
I felt that surely everybody isn'tdepressed all the time, forever
and ever, every single month.
Surely people don't cry at the dropof the hat when they're burnt out.
Over working too much and everything'sjust started to make sense in my
life and then we've done the themassive autism diagnostic tool and
(04:31):
My partner now wife at the time.
She was interviewed.
There was a lot of childhood thingsbrought back up that We, we laugh
about now that back in the 90s, theyweren't picked up in, in females.
It was just kind of seen as,I was quiet and shy and like
to collect pieces of paper.
(04:52):
And that, that was me.
That was just kind of the, the thingthat I liked and I was obsessed with
the TV show Buffy and all I want totalk about was Buffy and play Buffy and
I didn't want anyone to interrupt me.
So it was very rigid thinking,rigid like when I was younger and
conversation with me was absolutely dire.
(05:14):
I had to learn social skills.
So that's sort of how I've managedto find out I was autistic and find
out that I'm actually now okay andthat the last 31 years of my life
are starting to make sense now.
Jules-AutisticRadio.com (05:33):
Wow.
I'm glad that I Shut up,and just listen to you.
It was, it was a, it was a The waythat you put that together, in the
round like that, as one whole scene,put together, is very autistic for me.
(05:58):
It's, it's just the way wecommunicate, we have to have all of
the little bits of information putout gradually, so that then people
can see the whole picture at the end.
So, not interrupting you whileyou did that was important to me.
I could see where it, how it was shaping.
Harry-Autistic-Association.org:
Harry-Autistic-Association.org (06:18):
What I found interesting about Kelsey's
introduction there is the typicalstereotypical response a lot of people
have got from the medical professionor even just other people in general
is when you talk about autism,autism is this very negative thing.
(06:42):
So if you have been generally.
In society's eyes, success in life, andyou , according to others, , you have
achievements, like, a degree, you'vegot a job, , you go out and socialise,
, it's like, if you do all that, youcan't be autistic, and I think that's
(07:05):
quite damaging, and quite damaging.
It's frustrating thathappens to a lot of people.
I think it's changing slowly, butyou hear so many of these stories,
you're doing too well to be autistic.
You're living too well to be autistic,and that's the assumptions that are made.
So, it's another great exampleof , why people like Kelsey
(07:28):
aren't, , diagnosed or identified.
You know, understanding of autism isjust not about people suffering and
being evident that they're suffering andbeing limited because It's not like that.
Life isn't like that.
And as we all know, everybodyis individual and unique.
(07:50):
, thank you for sharing.
Kelsey-Kind-Crate (07:53):
Thank you both . I definitely feel that it is that difficult
sort of area that we're in just nowwhere, , if you look a certain way
and act a certain way, then, well,there's no chance, , you could be
autistic and the conversation, , wasclosed down and wasn't actually had.
(08:18):
Whereas if, , a few years earlier, hadwe went into that conversation, they
would have known that I I have neverbeen able to live on my own, I would
have constantly need reminded to eatand drink and shower and do all those
things and work is a fantastic routinefor me, which the shorter hours and
(08:41):
the routine at work kept me going.
There was definitely things in thebackground would have been picked up
had that conversation went further thanwell, you just don't look autistic.
So yeah, I think you bothmake very good points.
Yeah.
Jules-AutisticRadio.com (09:00):
But we can take some hope from this, can't we?
We can say that there has been enoughof a change within the professions
to notice autism enough in peoplewho are Getting by, masking it,
covering it up, for them , to change.
And you met , a professional whosaid, Wow, we got these labels wrong.
(09:24):
We need to look at this autism thingthat actually you had possibly been
pointing out to them previously.
So, there is a change there.
And I think for the people that arelistening to this, If they just listen
to your story, they will identifysometimes, in themselves, their own
(09:47):
need to go along and say, You know, Ido know enough about autism myself now
from the information that's out there.
I need to challenge some of these labelsthat have been put on me and I need you
to open up and think about autism for me.
So, what you're doing there isputting a very relatable story for
(10:11):
other people to be inspired by.
Kelsey-Kind-Crate (10:15):
I did have amazing support from an occupational
therapist when I was in that sortof six months period of getting the
official, on paper, diagnosis of autismand she was absolutely brilliant.
Got dyspraxia, so wedone some exercises and.
(10:37):
tools to work with that.
We talked a lot about maybesome anger or, I don't know,
being upset at the misdiagnosis.
But looking towards the futureand how can we change that?
And after my diagnosis and when Iwas discharged from the services,
(11:01):
I was actually asked by her to comeback and do a talk to all the nurses
from the mental health centre.
I'd done a talk about my misdiagnosis.
I was
Asked by her if I would come in andtalk with these nurses who were all
(11:23):
mental health trained background andhad people my age or slightly younger
on their caseloads and I went in,there was a presentation on the wall.
It was all about how I hadbeen misdiagnosed my whole
life and I'm actually autistic.
(11:43):
And that made much more sense in my life.
I was okay.
I was learning things, knew aboutmyself, learning how to manage different
things that come along with autism.
And yeah.
A few, was it a month, maybe later?
I got some feedback from thateducation and a lot of the nurses
(12:07):
had said that having a chat withsomebody who was autistic instead
of somebody who was Neurotypical
coming and teaching about autism wasso much more beneficial in the way that
they went back to their own caseloadsand realized so many different cases
(12:33):
of the females on their case wereactually autistic and didn't have
.AUPD or BPD.
So it was, it was a massive thingthat we had done and hopefully we're
planning to do it again sometime soon.
The outcome of that was theproper diagnosis for people
(12:54):
and that's great to me.
Jules-AutisticRadio.com: That is a lovely thing. (12:57):
undefined
You're working in the health serviceand the professionals around you are
bright enough and intelligent enough tosay come and speak to us, advocate, and
you see immediate effects from that.
That's a wonderful story.
I want to move on to Calm Crate becauseone of the things you talked about when we
were chatting was that you found stim toyssomething that had a place in your life.
Kelsey-Kind-Crate (13:23):
So I've always been known to fidget or have something in my
hand that I'm constantly playing with andI didn't really know what sensory toys
were until I was
.diagnosed with autism, and a group that I'd went to, a lot of the adults
(13:45):
there had different types of stim toys.
So one night I was on many differentretail sites trying to buy myself a
few, and the prices were, astronomical.
It
got me thinking, you know, I wonderif there's something I can do to
(14:08):
help people, you know, we're inthis budget financial crisis, what
if I start making up sensory boxes?
So I, I was thinking about differentnames for a long time and sensory toys.
stim toys, they definitelyhelped me feel calm.
(14:29):
And then the word crate just calme from, Icould picture in my head all these little
stim toys and fidget teddies and alldifferent things sit in a little crate.
They don't actually get sentout in crates, they go in boxes.
I thought the name was quite nice.
So I went with that and startedputting usually about, probably
(14:55):
up to nine different sensory toys.
So little clickers, anything that spins.
And on my website, I've got a partwhere it says customize, because I know
that what I put in the box for somebodymight, you know, they might actually
not like the touch of it or the texture.
(15:16):
Um, so I try and make, make itso personalized to that person.
It's for adults and children.
And a lot of peopleabsolutely loved the idea.
So they were getting sensory toys.
And boxes with lots of different thingsin it and pins and pin badges to wear
(15:39):
for 10 and they weren't having tospend an absolute fortune to get their
kids these toys are for themselves.
Jules-AutisticRadio.com: Okay, so this isn't a business (15:46):
undefined
as far as you're concerned.
What this is, is a, is a voluntary servicewhere you're putting things together
that people need and you're doing itin a way that, I don't know, Is sending
a bit of love out there, isn't it?
It's you're taking the thing that Made youcalm, helped you and making it available
(16:10):
in a, in an easier form and in a, uh,an accessible form for other people
and you're even keeping the price down.
That, that seems lovely.
Kelsey-Kind-Crate (16:21):
Definitely.
I absolutely, even now, I know youcan't see me, but I'm smiling ear to
ear when I talk about the calm cratebecause I just absolutely love putting
all my effort into making the boxes.
Thank you so much.
so accessible for people to buy andmaking sure that their needs are met.
(16:45):
So they can send me an emailand it can be almost a novel.
I will read it and I will makesure that they're getting exactly
what they want in that box.
And I always sign it off, you know,by saying thank you for supporting
my small, I suppose it is a businesskind of, so I always say thank you
(17:05):
for supporting my small business.
In the, in the sense that, you know,they've, they've looked me up, they've
bought some of the products that I haveand the feedback that I have been getting
has been so lovely and it just reaffirmswhy I do it, if that makes sense.
I just, I love it.
Jules-AutisticRadio.com: This is part of your life. (17:26):
undefined
It's, it's as much a benefit to youto know that what you're doing is
reaching out amongst your communityand, and they are appreciating you
in a way that is personal to you.
You know that they are enjoyingthese things in the way
(17:46):
that you're enjoying them.
This is, this is more than a business.
This is a, a part of how youhave dealt with your diagnosis.
That, that's a very positivething for you, I'm sure.
Kelsey-Kind-Crate (18:04):
It definitely feels like part of who I am now.
So, I felt quite lost for alittle bit, trying to figure out
how I was going to go forward.
And, how I was going to be brave enough totalk about being autistic in my workplace
(18:32):
and socially because the, the informationwasn't there for people and nobody
really knew much about autism that isaround me and I thought, Even putting out
information when I do the calm crate andif I'm on Instagram one day and I'll put
(18:57):
some products up, but then I'll do maybea post all about burnout and how, you
know, there's resources out there and whatother things can help people from burnout.
So kind of put both of them togetherin the hopes that, you know, Even if
people don't go and purchase from thecalm crate, hopefully they get some
(19:20):
benefit from reading about burnoutin ways that I've found helpful and
maybe ways that they can find helpful.
And I always try and, you know,signpost to places that could help them.
So it's definitely, I feel like it is apart of who I am and I just, I love it.
It's opened up so many, so manydoors for me and it's been brilliant.
Jules-AutisticRadio.com (19:43):
I love hearing what you're saying there, Kelsey.
I do worry a little bit, those of us thatfind about, out about our autism late
in life, , we can run at things a littlebit, we can get a bit too involved in it.
And I always think that there's a,there's a need to, to say to people
(20:03):
to slow down, calm down, take it easy,don't burn yourself out on this subject,
just because you've got the relief ofunderstanding parts of you, I would
say to people, take some time overthis, because you're going to find some
unexpected things along the way thatare going to take your time and energy,
but as long as you're managing this, andthis is acting as a positive thing for
(20:27):
you, It seems to me this is the, exactlythe sort of thing that other autistic
people in your position might look to do.
It might not be setting up Calm Crate,but it might be putting out their own
ideas on how they felt about theirown autism to share with other people.
Which I think is part of this podcast.
(20:48):
What you're saying there is going tobe so recognisable to so many people.
Kelsey-Kind-Crate (20:55):
You're definitely right about the burnout and getting
so involved in a project that you,you can't sort of see your way up.
I have a partner who isvery autistic informed.
(21:17):
She's not autistic herself, butshe's a social worker, so she's done
quite a lot of different courses.
So she, she's really good with me and,and the, Aspect of saying, I think you
might need to take a day off today.
And her judgment is alwayscorrect when I'm in burnout.
So I'll, I'll, I'll always listen to her.
(21:38):
And
when I first started the calm crate,she kind of thought, okay, this
is a nice, you know, maybe this isa special interest at the moment.
Of course, my partner is sounderstanding and amazing and she knows.
(21:59):
the signs of burnout and whatI start to act like and look
like just before burnout.
So she'll, she'll sort of say to me, Ithink today is a day you need to take off.
I know that you love the calmcrate, but you need to disengage.
And when I first started the calmcrate, she was convinced that
(22:24):
this was You know, hyper fixation.
I, I was just gonna be over it in threemonths and it's almost been a year now.
So I feel like I won that one becauseI've kept at it, but I've not managed to
burn myself out during it because I'vealways had that support around me from
(22:48):
my wife to say, okay, enough's enough.
You're exhausted.
Time to go to bed and maybe take aweek, a break, whatever it is you need.
before you don't like what you'redoing or before you get too burnt
out, you can't return to it.
And I appreciate that so much.
Jules-AutisticRadio.com (23:06):
Okay.
So it sounds as though there was goodadvice in there, but what you've done
is you've navigated it and make surethat the, the burnout doesn't happen
and that you've moderated thingswith the help from another person.
That that's really what I tryto say to people is that we can
get into a groove on things.
(23:27):
If we're not careful, straightafter diagnosis and, and that is
another possibility of a difficultywe might put up for ourselves.
I'm glad you've managed tonavigate your way around that.
I also think the idea that they said,Oh, this might just be one of your
enthusiasms and you're going to drop it.
Well, they said that about autistic radioand three years later, we're still here.
Kelsey-Kind-Crate (23:50):
Oh, I, I, that's, that's, that's, that's, It's so
funny, I feel like that's the casefor a lot of, you know, things that
people see as special interests.
Like, oh that'll, that'll fade away in,in a few months and we're, we're all
still staying strong with what we lovebecause we've got such a passion for it.
And it's the same with, with theradio, and you guys, such a Passion
(24:14):
for what you do and I love listeningto the, the edited clips when I'm
in my bed, I'll sit and listen tothem and they're always brilliant.
So, so yeah, so we've, we'venot, we've not given up yet.
Jules-AutisticRadio.com (24:28):
Well, Kelsey, you're part of the revolution.
You're part of the autistic revolutionwhere the people who would not have
been understood to be autistic in thepast, finding their voices, saying
things and expressing things aboutautism that Potentially are going to
help the professions and those otherpeople who knew about their autism
(24:48):
all along because they themselvesare in a much more difficult and
different position with their autism.
It's been great speaking to you today.
Let's make sure that everyoneknows how to find your service.
Find the Calm Crate.
What are the website details?
Kelsey-Kind-Crate (25:09):
The Calm Crate.
So it`s:
https://thecalmcrate.company.site/.
Jules-AutisticRadio.com (25:23):
To take that web address you've just given me, Kelsey, I'm
going to put it in the program notes andit's going to appear around the place.
So hopefully you won't get over, over,uh, subscribed with the request, but
maybe one or two other people will knowthat you're out there and know that
when you're getting your supports, yourfidget spinners and all those other
(25:45):
toys, stim toys from you, that they'recoming from somebody who understands
what they're doing, why they're doing it,from the inside as an autistic person.
Lovely speaking with you today.
I hope we will have another opportunityto speak to you in another context,
but for now, Kelsey, thank youfor being the focus . in our late
(26:08):
diagnosis, late date diagnosis show.
Thank you for coming andspeaking with us today, Kelsey.
Kelsey-Kind-Crate (26:14):
Thank you so much for having me.
It's been an absolute pleasure and Ijust love, love the autistic radio.
com and love listening to you guys.
So it's been a privilege to be on it.
AutisticRadio.com (26:25):
Thank you.
Cheers now.
I'll just stop the recording.
Jules-AutisticRadio.com: AutisticRadio.com (26:29):
That's the
beauty of the short introductionsto podcasts that we make.
An introduction to somebody.
Somebody with somethingto say about autism.
And that includes you.
It's very easy to makea recording with us.
We might publish 10 minutes orwe might publish 30 minutes.
(26:52):
It's about your relationship toautism, whether you're a professional,
a carer, or somebody with autism, anautistic person of autistic identity.
Contact me, Jules.
News at autisticradio.
com And let's make a recording togetherso that you can join and expand
(27:14):
upon the conversation around autism.
We speak our words, we listen, we speak our words, we listen.
We speak our words.
We listen.
We speak our words.
We
Jules-AutisticRadio.com (00:18):
listen.
Hello everybody, thank you forlistening again to Autistic Radio.
We have a lot of differentthings that we do here.
One of those is looking to give voice toAutistic people , who are making a change,
making a difference, or have somethingto say about how Autism is in this world.
(00:41):
Kelsey.
Kelsey has produced The Calm Crate.
The Calm Crate?
Sounds like a bargainfor families out there.
It sounds like a bargain forthose of us who like to change
our stim toys from time to time.
Wear them out.
Stim toys to calm ourselvesin certain situations.
(01:04):
Hello, Kelsey.
Let me introduce you today.
Kelsey-Kind-Crate (01:10):
Hi, Jules.
Jules-AutisticRadio.com (01:11):
Hi.
Well, we've got, um, Harry over there inone of the studios and Ray is probably
going to join us in a few moments.
While we're waiting for allthat, can you tell me about how
you discovered your own autism?
Kelsey-Kind-Crate (01:26):
Of course.
So, I was diagnosed with severaldifferent things when I was in my 20s.
There was a lot of depression, anxiety,bipolar, just lots of different
things that never felt fitting.
(01:49):
And the medication that I was given,
And every couple of months I would go backto my GP and I would say, I don't think
this antidepressant is working anymoreand they would just give me another one.
And when I had originally asked thepsychology people I was under, you know,
(02:15):
I, I think I'm autistic and I think Imust have been about 24 or 25 at this age.
And I said to them, Ithink I'm autistic and.
I could see them kind of look andsay, you, you're so well spoken and,
(02:36):
you know, you almost have a degree innursing and, you know, you go out and
you do things, you're not autistic.
And then we left it at that.
And then when I was 27, I reached.
back to that topic becauseI was struggling in work
(02:58):
with burnout continuously.
Noise was unbearable all the time and I'dhad to drop my hours quite significantly.
So I'd went from 37 and a halfto 30 to 22 and a half and that
(03:18):
was to, to manage my burnout.
And I got a differentpsychologist this time.
And we'd done a, a small, smallquiz before we'd done a, the
official autism diagnosis tool.
And she sat with me and I answered herquestions and she just kind of looked
(03:41):
at me and was like, we've got thiswrong, you're definitely autistic.
And at that moment, I kind of felt,
I felt.
Like, yeah.
I, I felt like I didn'tfit in with the world.
(04:05):
I felt that surely everybody isn'tdepressed all the time, forever
and ever, every single month.
Surely people don't cry at the dropof the hat when they're burnt out.
Over working too much and everything'sjust started to make sense in my
life and then we've done the themassive autism diagnostic tool and
(04:31):
My partner now wife at the time.
She was interviewed.
There was a lot of childhood thingsbrought back up that We, we laugh
about now that back in the 90s, theyweren't picked up in, in females.
It was just kind of seen as,I was quiet and shy and like
to collect pieces of paper.
(04:52):
And that, that was me.
That was just kind of the, the thingthat I liked and I was obsessed with
the TV show Buffy and all I want totalk about was Buffy and play Buffy and
I didn't want anyone to interrupt me.
So it was very rigid thinking,rigid like when I was younger and
conversation with me was absolutely dire.
(05:14):
I had to learn social skills.
So that's sort of how I've managedto find out I was autistic and find
out that I'm actually now okay andthat the last 31 years of my life
are starting to make sense now.
Jules-AutisticRadio.com (05:33):
Wow.
I'm glad that I Shut up,and just listen to you.
It was, it was a, it was a The waythat you put that together, in the
round like that, as one whole scene,put together, is very autistic for me.
(05:58):
It's, it's just the way wecommunicate, we have to have all of
the little bits of information putout gradually, so that then people
can see the whole picture at the end.
So, not interrupting you whileyou did that was important to me.
I could see where it, how it was shaping.
Harry-Autistic-Association.org:
Harry-Autistic-Association.org (06:18):
What I found interesting about Kelsey's
introduction there is the typicalstereotypical response a lot of people
have got from the medical professionor even just other people in general
is when you talk about autism,autism is this very negative thing.
(06:42):
So if you have been generally.
In society's eyes, success in life, andyou , according to others, , you have
achievements, like, a degree, you'vegot a job, , you go out and socialise,
, it's like, if you do all that, youcan't be autistic, and I think that's
(07:05):
quite damaging, and quite damaging.
It's frustrating thathappens to a lot of people.
I think it's changing slowly, butyou hear so many of these stories,
you're doing too well to be autistic.
You're living too well to be autistic,and that's the assumptions that are made.
So, it's another great exampleof , why people like Kelsey
(07:28):
aren't, , diagnosed or identified.
You know, understanding of autism isjust not about people suffering and
being evident that they're suffering andbeing limited because It's not like that.
Life isn't like that.
And as we all know, everybodyis individual and unique.
(07:50):
, thank you for sharing.
Kelsey-Kind-Crate (07:53):
Thank you both . I definitely feel that it is that difficult
sort of area that we're in just nowwhere, , if you look a certain way
and act a certain way, then, well,there's no chance, , you could be
autistic and the conversation, , wasclosed down and wasn't actually had.
(08:18):
Whereas if, , a few years earlier, hadwe went into that conversation, they
would have known that I I have neverbeen able to live on my own, I would
have constantly need reminded to eatand drink and shower and do all those
things and work is a fantastic routinefor me, which the shorter hours and
(08:41):
the routine at work kept me going.
There was definitely things in thebackground would have been picked up
had that conversation went further thanwell, you just don't look autistic.
So yeah, I think you bothmake very good points.
Yeah.
Jules-AutisticRadio.com (09:00):
But we can take some hope from this, can't we?
We can say that there has been enoughof a change within the professions
to notice autism enough in peoplewho are Getting by, masking it,
covering it up, for them , to change.
And you met , a professional whosaid, Wow, we got these labels wrong.
(09:24):
We need to look at this autism thingthat actually you had possibly been
pointing out to them previously.
So, there is a change there.
And I think for the people that arelistening to this, If they just listen
to your story, they will identifysometimes, in themselves, their own
(09:47):
need to go along and say, You know, Ido know enough about autism myself now
from the information that's out there.
I need to challenge some of these labelsthat have been put on me and I need you
to open up and think about autism for me.
So, what you're doing there isputting a very relatable story for
(10:11):
other people to be inspired by.
Kelsey-Kind-Crate (10:15):
I did have amazing support from an occupational
therapist when I was in that sortof six months period of getting the
official, on paper, diagnosis of autismand she was absolutely brilliant.
Got dyspraxia, so wedone some exercises and.
(10:37):
tools to work with that.
We talked a lot about maybesome anger or, I don't know,
being upset at the misdiagnosis.
But looking towards the futureand how can we change that?
And after my diagnosis and when Iwas discharged from the services,
(11:01):
I was actually asked by her to comeback and do a talk to all the nurses
from the mental health centre.
I'd done a talk about my misdiagnosis.
I was
Asked by her if I would come in andtalk with these nurses who were all
(11:23):
mental health trained background andhad people my age or slightly younger
on their caseloads and I went in,there was a presentation on the wall.
It was all about how I hadbeen misdiagnosed my whole
life and I'm actually autistic.
(11:43):
And that made much more sense in my life.
I was okay.
I was learning things, knew aboutmyself, learning how to manage different
things that come along with autism.
And yeah.
A few, was it a month, maybe later?
I got some feedback from thateducation and a lot of the nurses
(12:07):
had said that having a chat withsomebody who was autistic instead
of somebody who was Neurotypical
coming and teaching about autism wasso much more beneficial in the way that
they went back to their own caseloadsand realized so many different cases
(12:33):
of the females on their case wereactually autistic and didn't have
.AUPD or BPD.
So it was, it was a massive thingthat we had done and hopefully we're
planning to do it again sometime soon.
The outcome of that was theproper diagnosis for people
(12:54):
and that's great to me.
Jules-AutisticRadio.com: That is a lovely thing. (12:57):
undefined
You're working in the health serviceand the professionals around you are
bright enough and intelligent enough tosay come and speak to us, advocate, and
you see immediate effects from that.
That's a wonderful story.
I want to move on to Calm Crate becauseone of the things you talked about when we
were chatting was that you found stim toyssomething that had a place in your life.
Kelsey-Kind-Crate (13:23):
So I've always been known to fidget or have something in my
hand that I'm constantly playing with andI didn't really know what sensory toys
were until I was
.diagnosed with autism, and a group that I'd went to, a lot of the adults
(13:45):
there had different types of stim toys.
So one night I was on many differentretail sites trying to buy myself a
few, and the prices were, astronomical.
It
got me thinking, you know, I wonderif there's something I can do to
(14:08):
help people, you know, we're inthis budget financial crisis, what
if I start making up sensory boxes?
So I, I was thinking about differentnames for a long time and sensory toys.
stim toys, they definitelyhelped me feel calm.
(14:29):
And then the word crate just calme from, Icould picture in my head all these little
stim toys and fidget teddies and alldifferent things sit in a little crate.
They don't actually get sentout in crates, they go in boxes.
I thought the name was quite nice.
So I went with that and startedputting usually about, probably
(14:55):
up to nine different sensory toys.
So little clickers, anything that spins.
And on my website, I've got a partwhere it says customize, because I know
that what I put in the box for somebodymight, you know, they might actually
not like the touch of it or the texture.
(15:16):
Um, so I try and make, make itso personalized to that person.
It's for adults and children.
And a lot of peopleabsolutely loved the idea.
So they were getting sensory toys.
And boxes with lots of different thingsin it and pins and pin badges to wear
(15:39):
for 10 and they weren't having tospend an absolute fortune to get their
kids these toys are for themselves.
Jules-AutisticRadio.com: Okay, so this isn't a business (15:46):
undefined
as far as you're concerned.
What this is, is a, is a voluntary servicewhere you're putting things together
that people need and you're doing itin a way that, I don't know, Is sending
a bit of love out there, isn't it?
It's you're taking the thing that Made youcalm, helped you and making it available
(16:10):
in a, in an easier form and in a, uh,an accessible form for other people
and you're even keeping the price down.
That, that seems lovely.
Kelsey-Kind-Crate (16:21):
Definitely.
I absolutely, even now, I know youcan't see me, but I'm smiling ear to
ear when I talk about the calm cratebecause I just absolutely love putting
all my effort into making the boxes.
Thank you so much.
so accessible for people to buy andmaking sure that their needs are met.
(16:45):
So they can send me an emailand it can be almost a novel.
I will read it and I will makesure that they're getting exactly
what they want in that box.
And I always sign it off, you know,by saying thank you for supporting
my small, I suppose it is a businesskind of, so I always say thank you
(17:05):
for supporting my small business.
In the, in the sense that, you know,they've, they've looked me up, they've
bought some of the products that I haveand the feedback that I have been getting
has been so lovely and it just reaffirmswhy I do it, if that makes sense.
I just, I love it.
Jules-AutisticRadio.com: This is part of your life. (17:26):
undefined
It's, it's as much a benefit to youto know that what you're doing is
reaching out amongst your communityand, and they are appreciating you
in a way that is personal to you.
You know that they are enjoyingthese things in the way
(17:46):
that you're enjoying them.
This is, this is more than a business.
This is a, a part of how youhave dealt with your diagnosis.
That, that's a very positivething for you, I'm sure.
Kelsey-Kind-Crate (18:04):
It definitely feels like part of who I am now.
So, I felt quite lost for alittle bit, trying to figure out
how I was going to go forward.
And, how I was going to be brave enough totalk about being autistic in my workplace
(18:32):
and socially because the, the informationwasn't there for people and nobody
really knew much about autism that isaround me and I thought, Even putting out
information when I do the calm crate andif I'm on Instagram one day and I'll put
(18:57):
some products up, but then I'll do maybea post all about burnout and how, you
know, there's resources out there and whatother things can help people from burnout.
So kind of put both of them togetherin the hopes that, you know, Even if
people don't go and purchase from thecalm crate, hopefully they get some
(19:20):
benefit from reading about burnoutin ways that I've found helpful and
maybe ways that they can find helpful.
And I always try and, you know,signpost to places that could help them.
So it's definitely, I feel like it is apart of who I am and I just, I love it.
It's opened up so many, so manydoors for me and it's been brilliant.
Jules-AutisticRadio.com (19:43):
I love hearing what you're saying there, Kelsey.
I do worry a little bit, those of us thatfind about, out about our autism late
in life, , we can run at things a littlebit, we can get a bit too involved in it.
And I always think that there's a,there's a need to, to say to people
(20:03):
to slow down, calm down, take it easy,don't burn yourself out on this subject,
just because you've got the relief ofunderstanding parts of you, I would
say to people, take some time overthis, because you're going to find some
unexpected things along the way thatare going to take your time and energy,
but as long as you're managing this, andthis is acting as a positive thing for
(20:27):
you, It seems to me this is the, exactlythe sort of thing that other autistic
people in your position might look to do.
It might not be setting up Calm Crate,but it might be putting out their own
ideas on how they felt about theirown autism to share with other people.
Which I think is part of this podcast.
(20:48):
What you're saying there is going tobe so recognisable to so many people.
Kelsey-Kind-Crate (20:55):
You're definitely right about the burnout and getting
so involved in a project that you,you can't sort of see your way up.
I have a partner who isvery autistic informed.
(21:17):
She's not autistic herself, butshe's a social worker, so she's done
quite a lot of different courses.
So she, she's really good with me and,and the, Aspect of saying, I think you
might need to take a day off today.
And her judgment is alwayscorrect when I'm in burnout.
So I'll, I'll, I'll always listen to her.
(21:38):
And
when I first started the calm crate,she kind of thought, okay, this
is a nice, you know, maybe this isa special interest at the moment.
Of course, my partner is sounderstanding and amazing and she knows.
(21:59):
the signs of burnout and whatI start to act like and look
like just before burnout.
So she'll, she'll sort of say to me, Ithink today is a day you need to take off.
I know that you love the calmcrate, but you need to disengage.
And when I first started the calmcrate, she was convinced that
(22:24):
this was You know, hyper fixation.
I, I was just gonna be over it in threemonths and it's almost been a year now.
So I feel like I won that one becauseI've kept at it, but I've not managed to
burn myself out during it because I'vealways had that support around me from
(22:48):
my wife to say, okay, enough's enough.
You're exhausted.
Time to go to bed and maybe take aweek, a break, whatever it is you need.
before you don't like what you'redoing or before you get too burnt
out, you can't return to it.
And I appreciate that so much.
Jules-AutisticRadio.com (23:06):
Okay.
So it sounds as though there was goodadvice in there, but what you've done
is you've navigated it and make surethat the, the burnout doesn't happen
and that you've moderated thingswith the help from another person.
That that's really what I tryto say to people is that we can
get into a groove on things.
(23:27):
If we're not careful, straightafter diagnosis and, and that is
another possibility of a difficultywe might put up for ourselves.
I'm glad you've managed tonavigate your way around that.
I also think the idea that they said,Oh, this might just be one of your
enthusiasms and you're going to drop it.
Well, they said that about autistic radioand three years later, we're still here.
Kelsey-Kind-Crate (23:50):
Oh, I, I, that's, that's, that's, that's, It's so
funny, I feel like that's the casefor a lot of, you know, things that
people see as special interests.
Like, oh that'll, that'll fade away in,in a few months and we're, we're all
still staying strong with what we lovebecause we've got such a passion for it.
And it's the same with, with theradio, and you guys, such a Passion
(24:14):
for what you do and I love listeningto the, the edited clips when I'm
in my bed, I'll sit and listen tothem and they're always brilliant.
So, so yeah, so we've, we'venot, we've not given up yet.
Jules-AutisticRadio.com (24:28):
Well, Kelsey, you're part of the revolution.
You're part of the autistic revolutionwhere the people who would not have
been understood to be autistic in thepast, finding their voices, saying
things and expressing things aboutautism that Potentially are going to
help the professions and those otherpeople who knew about their autism
(24:48):
all along because they themselvesare in a much more difficult and
different position with their autism.
It's been great speaking to you today.
Let's make sure that everyoneknows how to find your service.
Find the Calm Crate.
What are the website details?
Kelsey-Kind-Crate (25:09):
The Calm Crate.
So it`s:
https://thecalmcrate.company.site/.
Jules-AutisticRadio.com (25:23):
To take that web address you've just given me, Kelsey, I'm
going to put it in the program notes andit's going to appear around the place.
So hopefully you won't get over, over,uh, subscribed with the request, but
maybe one or two other people will knowthat you're out there and know that
when you're getting your supports, yourfidget spinners and all those other
(25:45):
toys, stim toys from you, that they'recoming from somebody who understands
what they're doing, why they're doing it,from the inside as an autistic person.
Lovely speaking with you today.
I hope we will have another opportunityto speak to you in another context,
but for now, Kelsey, thank youfor being the focus . in our late
(26:08):
diagnosis, late date diagnosis show.
Thank you for coming andspeaking with us today, Kelsey.
Kelsey-Kind-Crate (26:14):
Thank you so much for having me.
It's been an absolute pleasure and Ijust love, love the autistic radio.
com and love listening to you guys.
So it's been a privilege to be on it.
AutisticRadio.com (26:25):
Thank you.
Cheers now.
I'll just stop the recording.
Jules-AutisticRadio.com: AutisticRadio.com (26:29):
That's the
beauty of the short introductionsto podcasts that we make.
An introduction to somebody.
Somebody with somethingto say about autism.
And that includes you.
It's very easy to makea recording with us.
We might publish 10 minutes orwe might publish 30 minutes.
(26:52):
It's about your relationship toautism, whether you're a professional,
a carer, or somebody with autism, anautistic person of autistic identity.
Contact me, Jules.
News at autisticradio.
com And let's make a recording togetherso that you can join and expand
(27:14):
upon the conversation around autism.
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