#24 Gallo Chingon | Being a sex addict, a spouses death, mental health - Bang Two Three Podcast

Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
Hey beautiful people and thank youfor listening to the Bang 2 3
podcast. If you find this funny,entertaining, or insightful, feel
free to leave us a review on Applepodcast or if you want to make my day,
go show us some love on our Instagrampage because I love each and every
single one of you. Thank you forlistening. So is your manager a boy

(00:23):
or girl? Uh, guy, male. If yourmanager was a girl, would you fuck
her? They have to be really hotbecause I'm not a, I don't like to
shit where I eat, so they have to belike really hot and like into like a
lot of the stuff I'm into to even forme to consider like crossing that,

(00:44):
that line. So do you have somethingagainst fucking ugly bitches? I
mean, what's going on here, dude? Ohno, like back in the day, it wouldn't
even matter like size, shape,appearance. Back when I had my
intercourse addiction was reallydeep into it. I didn't care if it was
getting to that 12, 13 hour mark, I'dgo find whatever I could. But it's

(01:08):
kind of 12, 12, 13 hours. That wasyour cut off where you were, you was
feigning for some, for some puts.Yeah. My dry spells, from like 97
through 2001, other than basictraining, my dry spells were hours.
It wasn't days. Like if it was twodays, I was like something's wrong

(01:29):
with the world. Like the world needsto end because this is bullshit.
What, okay, what would you feelaround 12, 13 hours? Like was it just
a mental thing? Was it physical?What would you feel? Oh man, it's
been a while. It was kind of like Iwould just lose focus on anything
that was in my life other than tryingto find someone to get it in. And a lot

(01:52):
of times, at least back then, I had arotation, so it didn't have to get
close to that point. Like I wassaying, like my longest dry spells
were about 24 hours, but on averageit was 8 to 10 hours in between at the
most. Like by the time I woke up, I hadto either somebody coming in waking
me up or somebody on their way to comeover to see me. So hypothetically,

(02:13):
if you did fuck your boss, how wouldyou approach this sex? Would it be,
let's say also that you kind of don'tlike them because most people don't
like their boss. Would it just belike, listen, I'm just going to take
all my frustration out on them? Whatwould be your approach to this type
of intercourse? I don't knowbecause I haven't, since I've kind

(02:33):
of gotten clean, I guess, I haven'thad that kind of mindset anymore.
But if it were nowadays, and to say ifsomeone was attractive, what I
would probably do is figure out, arethey interested? Is there, first I
want to find out if they'reinterested and if they're down. If
they are down, then it would be adifferent conversation of like,
okay, well, what are they into? Whatkind of sex are they into? If they're

(02:56):
all three holes are open, then okay,I might want to proceed. If they only
do oral and vaginal, then I was like,fine, okay, you're one of those. So
it's like, you know, it's, yeah,there's a lot of factors that go into
it. Like I don't just jump into sexlike I used to. Hey, that's actually
an interesting point because I didsay that you don't like your boss. So

(03:18):
you're probably not sitting downtalking about life for fucking
three hours every day and just yourboss comes out the blue. Let's just
call her name Sandra. It's justlike, hey, Gaiyo, you want to come to
my place tonight? You would be takenlike, oh shit, you know, and be like,
oh shit, but you agree to this.Right? It's like, yeah, you know,

(03:40):
I'll go. So yeah, you're right. It isa weird situation. You think maybe
she would have like an anger orsomething like that. She's trying
to trap you, get you fired. Yeah. Imean, for me, it's more of, yeah, I'm
always analyzing the situationbecause again, it's not, I don't
have that fiend mentality anymorebecause before it was just an excuse
to feel better, to get over myfeelings because or feel better

(04:04):
whatever was about going on becauseit was essentially seeing my value
as a man. I could only increase myvalue by sleeping with women by the
more women I'm with, the more of a manI am. And so now that I realize that I
can detach from that, that my valueis my integrity and who I am and all
these other things that are not justone dimensional essentially, then

(04:25):
I can go ahead and maneuver in abetter way. So even if she was
interested and she was down to do allthe things I wanted to do, I would
still try to make sure that it'ssomething she wanted or is it just
something that she's, like yousaid, trying to get me fired, you
know, I'm trying to find the anglebefore I commit to it and make sure
that I'm not going to get anytrouble. Yeah. So I guess it would

(04:47):
make sense to clarify. So you,right, we just hopped into this,
right? I'm feeling froggy today. Iapologize if I caught you off guard.
No, no, no, this is fun. This is, thisis way different, but I like it. Hell
yeah. Yeah. So you are a selfdescribed recovered sex addict,
right? Okay. Yeah. And so that's,and by the way, I'm not asking you

(05:07):
these, would you fuck your bossquestions because you were a sex
addict? It was just on my mind. Just,just random. Do you think being are
you were a sex addict? Do you thinkthere are the state of being
addicted to sex? Do you think that isa bug or a feature of humans? Oh,

(05:29):
that's a good one. That is, that is avery different one. The, the cause
was a bug, but the outcome was afeature and I'll explain it this
way. So I was a sex addict because Ididn't know how to deal with my
feelings. I didn't know how to dealwith my emotions other than angry,
happy or sad. I don't understandanything else. Like it just didn't
make sense to me being depressed. IfI was depressed and I need to fix it,

(05:52):
the only way to fix it is to bust a nut.But the feature, a part of it is that
it made me good and it made me force meto develop social skills,
charisma, being funny, beingwitty. And it forced me to be better
with women in general. And as awhole, be better having with people
in general to have conversationsabout any topic and being able to

(06:14):
bounce between different worlds.Because being an intercourse
addict doesn't mean that I wasalways going for, you know,
whatever's around. And sometimes Iwould meet a doctor or a lawyer and
I'm going to get it in. It might takeme a couple of months. She's going to
be on the back burner while I fuckthese other women, but I'm going to
fuck me a lawyer. I'm going to fuck mea doctor. So then I had to get on their
level, essentially, even though Iwas a scrub. So, OK, so you talked

(06:38):
about intellectually becauseyou're me also, I am a fucking scrub.
So me thinking like in order to fuck alawyer, like, man, I got to be a smart
ass dude. Like I better read up on myshit. I better be somewhat
sophisticated. Is this what youwould do or how would you get on their
level? So to backtrack, we'retalking about late 90s, early
2000s. So this is early times of theInternet, a lot of information

(07:01):
really isn't out there. Googlewasn't even a thing. This is back
when we're talking like Alta Vista,Yahoo, GeoCities. Like there was a
bunch of different search engines.So there wasn't anything that you
could find information easily tobegin with. And so unless you knew
the website for something like youhad to know W, W, W, because this is we

(07:22):
enter the whole fucking thing on abrowser. So trying to find
information was difficult. So youjust still kind of had to figure
things out as you went. But the perksof the early days of the Internet,
especially with AOL is it kind ofmade you seem more respectable or
seem like, OK, at least this personisn't a murderer or whatever. You

(07:44):
know, there's kind of anassumption. If you could afford to
have a computer, a $2,000 computerand $20 a month to log on to the
Internet, because Internet wasn'tfree back then. Back then you had to
pay to get on, you had to dial in. Youcouldn't share pictures or wasn't
dating websites or even datingapps. It was just talking to people
and kind of just spitting game intolike, hey, I'm a 19 year old male on

(08:08):
this part of town. What do you like?What are you doing? And having all
these conversations with womentrying to understand them, trying
to understand their motivationsand then convince them, hey, well,
let's meet up for coffee atStarbucks or let's meet up at
Denny's and have a bite to eat orwhatever. And so once they agreed to
come on or to meet up, meet meoffline, what we called it then,
then it was it was easy because youalready had that. OK, you already

(08:29):
got the hook set and it's just amatter of, OK, you don't look like a
gross, disgusting person. Allright, let's go ahead and have sex.
Let's go ahead and hook up. And sohooking up back then was super easy.
Like if hook up culture startedthen, I don't know where we would be
now. But back then it was it was supereasy to get laid. It wasn't that it
was great or attractive or had a lotof game. It was just enough game to

(08:50):
get people to or girls to meet me inperson and go from there. So you
think it was easier to get laid backthen than now? Because everybody
everybody exclaims that, like,man, you can just trip and fall into
some beautiful woman. But you thinkit was easier then? Oh, yeah, it was a
fuck ton easier then. Like I said,all you had to do was have enough game
to convince them to meet youoffline. And once you met in person,

(09:13):
it was a matter, OK, where can wemeet? Or let's go back to your place.
Let's go back to my place. It wasn'treally that difficult. Now it's
more difficult because with datingapps, you got to swipe right. You
have to talk to them and you got tocome up with a great opener for them
to even bother to respond to you. Andthen it's like pulling teeth with
especially when girls don't haveanything on their profile or have

(09:35):
like two or three pictures andyou're trying to OK, what do you want
to? And all the guys are going to askthe same question. So you got to come
up with something that's unique anddifferent for them to even bother
paying attention to you to keeptalking to you. And they would lose
interest. Whereas the early days ofthe Internet, everyone was excited
to talk to anybody like anyconversation. Hey, how you doing?

(09:55):
Would turn into a long three day longconversation. It would it could
turn into hooking up in the next 30minutes. This is dependent on the
time of day, who you ended up meetingor you end up talking to. So back then
it was easier because there wasn'tthat abundance for women of guys
hitting on them and talking to them.So now, at least with with online
dating apps and all the other stuffthat's going around like Tinder,

(10:17):
Bumple, also shit. It is moredifficult, I think, for guys to hook
up that way. But it's easier for mebecause I do my stuff through in
person and having to walk up to awoman and have a conversation with
her and not be afraid of hearing a no.Yo, that is such good insight. I
never thought about it that waythat, yeah, you're right nowadays.
Like the bar is a lot higher too,right? Because, you know, if you're

(10:40):
putting up those Tinder profiles,like you got to write the perfect
bio, your picture's got to be good.You know, maybe you photoshop them a
little bit, but you don't tell them.The lighting has to be good. You
know, you have to have like decentclothes and shit like that. And, you
know, back then a chick, she didn'tknow since there wasn't the
Internet, she only knew what she'sseen in real life. So she couldn't go
on Instagram and see all these big,swole ass dudes. You know, one thing

(11:03):
I wanted to ask you was a lot of womensay that this sentence, hey, it
isn't just guys who want to get laidall the time. Girls want to fuck just
as bad as men. We just don't show it.Do you think that's true with your
past? Let me play doubles. I have toget real quick. Go ahead. Let me just

(11:23):
real quick. And I'm going to let you.Since you were addicted to sex, you
were probably fucking a bunch ofwhores. So your your view is skewed.
No, I never paid for sex. They mighthave been. I take that back. I did
hook up with a couple ofprostitutes, sex workers,
whatever to call them. But I didn'tfind out to laughter the fact that
they were. And through with them, itwas easy to referral sex. So women

(11:45):
have this thing where if you're goodin bed and they only see as a fuck
buddy, as a fuck toir or fuck friendswith benefits, they will pass you
off along to their friends. But backthen I didn't know about it because
they would send them each othereither instant messages or they
would call each other because wedidn't have. We had cell phones with
text messages were superexpensive. So they would call each
other and tell him, hey, you know,log on. And this is his screen name

(12:08):
and just talk to him and you won'tregret it. And I didn't find out
until. I don't even know how manytimes it had happened, but I knew one
girl kind of slipped up andmentioned something. Oh, yeah, so
and so was right. Right about what?And just getting passed around. So
hooking up my skewed view is beingable to see all forms of women from,
you know, trailer trash, toothlesswomen. them in to waitresses, to

(12:32):
doctors and lawyers and everythingin between. What's the best type of
woman? Like if you just, you justwalk in a bar and you're like, I just
want to find the best piece of pussytonight. What do I look for? Hmm. And
you're right. Everyone's flavor isdifferent, right? So what you call
good puss and what I call it isdifferent, right? So for me, good
sex or good puss is more of they'reopen to do and try anything. So

(12:57):
that's so my, my bar in a sense ishigher because not a lot of girls
have all three holes open. Somegirls are just oral and badge. Some
girls are just badge only they won'tgive head. Um, and there are girls
that won't give head, but it'll doanal and badge. So it just kind of
depends. Um, one thing that I havelearned is a good looking woman does

(13:17):
not equal good sex. It's possible,but more than likely your average
looking girl is going to be thebiggest freak and is going to be
better in bed than, you know, yoursuper models. Like, um, well, this
is a poor comparison, but say a girlthat looks like Ariana Grande and I
don't mean the facial features. Imean, like the body type, you know,
tea, small breasts, small ass, noass versus a girl like, uh, Kim K. If

(13:44):
she was natural or whatever, but sheknows she's a baddie, she more than
likely is going to lay there orexpect you to do more work or kind of
make you pay for more things or doextra things for her to bother to
give you head. That's going to beteeth scraping all the bad shit. So
I'd rather have a less than that orabout an average looking woman.
That's bad in bed than a hot lookingchick on my arm. I'm so glad you said

(14:08):
Kim K. There's a, there's a rumor Iheard that in the middle of sex, she
would stop and do her makeup and thengo back to having sex. And that's
fucking crazy, bro. I know she's KimK. But I, you got to go. I'm sorry.
Well, seeing her sex video, I waslike, Jesus, like that just kind of
reiterates my point. Like her headgame was terrible. She's just kind

(14:28):
of laid there for most of it. And I wasjust like, it was bad. She couldn't
even back it up. She couldn't throwit on her. Even Paris Hilton, Paris
Hilton was a little better at hand,but, you know, not by a lot. And so,
you know, for me, like I said, youknow, the more attractive they are
or the bigger the celebrity theyare, they're not going to have that
much experience because they'regoing to be called out as a slut for
hooking up and doing all those otherthings. So they don't get that

(14:49):
experience. And the lessattractive girls, for me, it's kind
of like a, like a fat girl. You know,the fat girl is always going to give
great head because she's not goingto get that off in. Well, similar,
apply that mindset to average plainJane girls. They're going to put it
on you because they want to keepgetting it. They want to have more
sex. They want to have good sex. Theywant to keep their partner around.
So how else are they going to keepthem unless they put it on them? Yo,

(15:11):
I, first of all, I completelyconcur. And I probably haven't had
as much sex as you, not even close. Isthat the, is that the telltale sign?
That's one of my theories is if you,if you get a girl in bed or whatever,
and the first thing she does is suckyou up like it is her last fucking
meal. I'm talking about like somecrazy ass head. Is that a sign that

(15:32):
she is like great in bed? That's agood indicator that she's more than
likely. Good in bed. See, have I had abad experience? Hmm. She's
definitely going to be better thanaverage. Uh, but then on that
inverse side, do you want to have heras your girlfriend or do you just
want to have her for fun? Becausethen you got to think if she's doing

(15:55):
this with you within the first hourof meeting you or the same night on a
meeting at our dance club or afterthe first date, now you got to think,
okay, has she been doing this?What's her body count? And I'm
speaking for guys in general, mepersonally, I don't care about body
count. My body count is stupid. Um, Istopped counting once I hit a
thousand and I was even off then.When I hit a thousand, uh, I used to

(16:18):
play a game that was just, yeah, itwas dumb. Shit. Damn. Yeah, that's
some crazy shit. Yeah. So you'reright. And, and I guess we're
talking about like good and bad inbed and it's all subjective. Maybe,
hey, maybe some guys like whenever,you know, a chick just lays there and
it's just like, all right, you know,maybe some chicks like the, maybe
some guys like the Kim K head orwhatever, where they don't even

(16:38):
suck it. So what, what tips, what,what's the best way to give a girl an
orgasm in your opinion? Give us theinside scoop here. Every girl's
different. R-really? Every girl isa lot different. Some will climax
from penetration, other from clit,other, they do need a vibrator on
their clits and climax. Othersclimax harder from anal. Uh, I've

(17:01):
known a few girls that get super wetjust from giving me head. Like they
just get close to coming. Uh, I hadone girl that couldn't come unless
she had come on her. Like if a guybusted on her, then she could come
like just, just being dirty likethat. So it's, it's all kinds of
things. The best way to get a girl tocome is paying attention to her, uh,

(17:24):
just paying attention to her, howshe reacts, how she moans. If she
moans more dirt in a certain stroke,keep that stroke. If also, well, so
if you were with a girl long enough towhere you can trust that you don't
have to wear a condom with her, youcan feel her getting wetter or
clenching tighter if you're payingattention. So it's, it's a lot of
work to get a girl to come, but beingable to guarantee or get more girls

(17:47):
to come is the best way to get them tobe like addicted to you. Uh, I have a
theory of a hundred that is one of mypodcast episodes. Short form is
just pretend you've only been with10 women and you only had sex with
them 10 times. Almost any guy I ask onearth that's had sex that many
times, if you ask them, how manytimes did you not come? It's

(18:09):
probably going to be less than five.And the reason that they didn't come
five times out of a hundred is morethan likely either whiskey dick or,
you know, they just rub one out thatday earlier, like right before they
got laid and they didn't realizethey're going to get laid later that
day. If you ask the women the samequestion, more often than not,
their numbers for them climaxing is10 to 50 % of the time. And it's not

(18:31):
like every guy makes them come onceor every guy makes them come half the
time. Most of the guys can't get themto come one or two guys, one or two
times, two or three guys, half thetime, but there's going to be one or
two other guys that'll make themcome every time or 90 % of the time.
And those are the guys that they willdrive three or four hours for just so

(18:52):
you can fuck them and go back homewhen you're done. So it's better for
guys to focus on getting girls tocome and climax and have orgasms,
repeated orgasms. And they'reputting your hands after that
point. They're dignitized.Exactly. Yeah, some shit. I learned
that word with a previous podcast,Layla. Shout out to Layla, who's

(19:12):
also a huge freak, self-proclaimedfreak. So does orgasms even matter?
Because you'll talk to some chicksand they'll be like, oh, it doesn't
matter. It doesn't matter. If I goand I have sex with a chick, like
let's just say, and it's, it's, it'slong, I don't, I don't bust in that in
two minutes, right? I fuck her for anhour. We do four play. We do, you
know, everything that she likes orwhatever, but she just doesn't

(19:34):
come. Is that just as good as makingher come? Or is it 90 % or what do you
think? I think it depends on the girlbecause there are some women that
haven't climax themselves that,you know, have a hard time coming
from sex. Most of the time. Sorry. Sothose specific girls, most of the
time they can only climax frommasturbation and playing with
themselves, but either, and this isin my experience, I'm not saying I

(19:57):
know every woman, but in myexperience with those women, a lot
of times they're tooself-conscious to come with a guy.
The first few times they're withthem because they're, they're in
their head. They're worried about,oh, you know, do I smell? Can he smell
me? Do I look fat? Like they can be intheir head and not be able to climax
that way. So it's probably going totake the 10th, 11th, 20th time of you

(20:22):
putting in the work for them toactually come. And so it can happen,
but it's again, you know, are yougoing to put in the work with all
these women or this particularwoman to keep going? Or are you the
type of guy that just does one nightstands, hits and quits it because
you're not getting what you want. Soon another point is I would
recommend guys have, um, Monk Blancflings with women versus trying to

(20:45):
have one night stands. Because one,you'd have to put in the work of
trying to find a new woman to hook upwith her and then try to go out the
next night, try to find someone,another woman, meet a girl on Friday
night. You might be able to see herFriday, Saturday and Sunday, or
just spend the whole weekend withher and have all the fun you want. And
maybe she'll want to see the nextweekend if you do it right. But if
you're trying to have one nightstands every night, every weekend,

(21:05):
you might find a girl that's good inbed, but because you're not putting
in the work, she's like, Oh, well,you're not good in bed. I don't want
to see you again. So now you're kindof like, you know, you, you takes a
hit to your confidence. You stop,um, going out because you're kind of
in your head or whatever. So it's,it's a lot of moving parts in it. Did
you try to get things working to havea woman to climax? Yo, does this shit

(21:28):
bother you? Because I'm, I'm, we'retalking about something that you
were previously addicted to,right? And we're kind of talking
about like the good sides of it.Like, yeah, getting all this ass or
whatever. And you are cool as afucking cucumber. Does this shit
not get to you? No. Um, because Irealized that, like I said, my
identity isn't about sex and beingthe super badass guy because I had

(21:51):
some, you know, uh, swings andmisses too. It's not like I got laid
every time I approached women, youknow, I'm not, uh, batting a
thousand all the time. I still getmisses, but now I'm more selective
about me to go in and at that anymore.So with that, I know that my
addiction, it isn't like, Oh, metalking about it makes me want it

(22:11):
again, kind of like with drugaddicts or food. Because on that
note, with like drug or alcohol to besober, you just don't do it anymore.
For food addicts, you still got toeat, you know, and, and the
representation of food addicts isthey get big, they get fat, they get
overweight. But with sexaddiction, you don't see it. It's
not like there's any kind ofphysical change in your body that's
noticable. So with that, I nevereven thought it was a problem. It

(22:35):
wasn't until I stumbled upon this,this random celebrate recovery,
uh, meeting with a friend of minethat I kept going to for a few times
and realized, Oh, shit, sexaddiction is a real thing. It's not
just something celebrities say toget out of having a pay alimony or
whatever. So with it, it wasn'tbased on my need for sex. It was based

(22:56):
on my need to feel good about myselfbecause I had a bad day and I didn't
know how to deal with those emotionsof negative feelings or sadness or,
you know, not feeling good. And now Iknow that if I feel bad, I could just
talk about it. Or process it in myhead. Hey, well, why was I upset
about this? Oh, because it remindedme something that happened when I

(23:17):
was a kid, that someone hurt myfeelings then I'm carrying that
until now done. I don't have to dealwith that or hold onto it. You know,
that's so interesting. You saidthat because I feel the same thing,
um, not with sex. So I, I think this isa common, like addictive behavior.
You have a really bad day, right? Youturn to your thing. Like you said, it
could be food. It could be alcohol.Yours was sex. And so how did you,

(23:43):
how, I guess now do you deal with thatbad day without turning to sex? Uh,
nowadays it's just more ofrealizing, Hey, it's not as big of a
deal as I'm going to make it in my headbecause I would get stuck on
something that, that bothered me.Um, you know, talk to a girl and she
told me, no, I didn't get a raise. Ididn't get a promotion. Uh, you

(24:06):
know, my wife didn't do X, Y or Z or,you know, last night I wanted to get
laid and she said no, or she rolledover or stayed asleep or whatever.
You know, so taking those andrealizing, Hey, I'm not the center
of the universe. As much as I like tobe, I do the world does not revolve
around me. The sun doesn't rollaround me. So I have to understand
that I have to be a part of society. Ihave to be a part of this ecosystem

(24:29):
that I'm in. So living that way makesme understand that eventually it's
going to be my turn. Eventually I'mgoing to get what I want. I just have
to have patience. I have to gothrough my life just like everybody
else and enjoy what I can when I can.Did you cheat on your wife? Oh yeah.
My first wife, I cheated on her left.Um, I told her when we first, first

(24:52):
got together, I'm going to get laidevery day. There's no question
about I want sex every day. And ofcourse most girls, oh yeah, haha.
ever. Yeah, sure. And, you know,whether she was a part of it, it
wasn't that wasn't my problem. Thatwas her problem because she didn't
want to have sex. And then of course,she'd find out I cheated on her.
She'd get mad, didn't want to havesex. I go cheat on her again. And then

(25:13):
eventually she'd get tired of notgetting laid. So then we'd have sex
and it'd be a vicious circle untilshe found out at the next girl, the
last girl that I hooked up with. Andso how did you convince her to not
fucking leave you for cheating? Sheeventually did. Like it was after a
while, she's got tired of it. But inthe beginning, I mean, it was just I

(25:35):
so I'm also in the king community andI'm a dumb. So with her, I had a lot of
essentially mind control over her.If she had if she was upset, she slept
on the couch, not me. I'm paying thebills. I take care of this. Daddy
sleeps in the bed. You got a problem?You go sleep on the couch. If you
stay, you know, and if you reallymisbehave, I had to sleep in the
closet like door closed, she'sgoing to go sleep in the closet

(25:58):
because, you know, she's want to acta fool. Then, you know, she's not
going to get to get human comfortsbecause I was a super asshole. Holy
fuck. Okay. Holy what is what's thattype of relationship like between a
Dom and whatever you callsubmissive? A submissive? What's

(26:19):
that like? It depends on how youdefine it and what you expect the
role to be like. What's yours? Whatwas yours like? With her, it wasn't
even established as submissive. SoI was part of the king community,
specifically being a Dom and arigor, which I would do role play to
Shabari, tie the woman up. But Ididn't really get into it. The real

(26:41):
part of it until after I gotdivorced. But for the most part, I
had a mentor that taught me how to be aDom, how to take care of things and
treat things. But I manipulatedwhen kind of like an extra mile was an
asshole to keep, essentially mindcontrol over her, keep her under my
heel. And that relationshipbasically was toxic because I

(27:02):
abused my power. So it wasn't ahealthy relationship with my first
wife. With my second wife, it wasbetter, but that was more, that was
more of a regular relationship.There wasn't a Dom submissive in
that one. She would be submissive ingeneral to me, but it wasn't really a
dynamic that we had together. So myDom sub stuff is more, you know,

(27:25):
between my first wife and secondwife and then after my second wife.
So when I wasn't married,essentially. And those
relationships can be anything froma daddy Dom with a little or a middle.
So littles are essentially womenthat kind of put the cells in the
space of being kind of like anelementary school age, coloring,

(27:45):
cute dresses, having tea parties,whatever. And middles are more kind
of like teenagers where, you know,they sit there and listen to music
from, you know, when they were ateenager, all these other kind of
stuff. And it doesn't have to besexual. Like this is just kind of
like being able to take care ofsomeone or give someone safety and
security where they don't have to bean adult. And then they see me like as

(28:07):
a Superman. So that's kind of thereward for me from that type of
relationship. But then there areDom sub relationships where, you
know, before they even get to havesex, before I even put it in them,
they have to crawl around and do XYZor clean up my house half naked or
whatever I want them to do. And itjust depends on whatever we

(28:28):
establish. But the reason they workis we have these conversations of
what we want, what we're willing totry our absolute knows and some
things that we might want to try. Butwe want to wait until there's a
little bit more trust andconfidence and safety with each
other before we explore these otherkind of things. So so the Dom stuff

(28:50):
would be mainly in the bedroom, butyou're saying sometimes it would
leak out of the bedroom. So ofcourse, in the bedroom, tire up,
spanker all the kinky shit shewants. But then you would also be
having a conversation. You'd belike, you know what, I don't like the
way you act. And today, sleep yourass on the couch. And she would say
yes, Daddy. So for those, at least sothe where I would have her sleep on

(29:12):
the couch or the the closet was justwith my first wife, just because I
was an asshole and mistreated herthat way. With the other ones when
they misbehave, I just spankedthem, or I deny them sex. Like I tell
them, okay, you're not getting sextoday, because you didn't you
didn't make me happy. And dependingon that relationship, I would bring
another sub in and fuck her in frontof the one that was behaved to show

(29:35):
her, hey, I'm going to get it. You'renot because you're not you're not
following the line, you're notfollowing the rules. And so it's
just part of being an intercourseaddict and falling into the King
community. Holy fuck, do yourealize that your sex life is like
the envy of 99 % of men? Hmm? Myaverage month for me is most guys

(30:01):
lifetime. Or at least before Irealized I was intercourse addict.
Now it's, I don't even run throughthat many women now, it's just kind
of like you keep the same smallharem, you know, women that I keep
talking to that I've known for thepast few years, because the
downside of having been anintercourse addict and not
realizing it and mistreating womenis a lot of women enjoy being used and

(30:24):
misused and treated like an objectand being objectified. But they
only like that in the bedroom. Theystill want you to treat them as human
being outside of that. And I wasn'tdoing that. I was just using and
abusing them. And if they didn'tlike it, but well, I'll find a new
one. Since I realized I was anintercourse addict, my approach to
sex wasn't just to get it in. It wasokay, I want a healthy relationship

(30:46):
with a woman or women in general. Andso I take care of them, treat them as a
normal human being, haveconversations with them, talk
about their life, their husband,their children, whatever's got
going on. And when they get divorcedor when they end up being single
again, we might play again if we'rein the same city. And so with that, I
can have technically my rotationthat I like and enjoy, but I don't

(31:09):
have to have the commitment of arelationship because I'm still
talking to these women over theyears. And whenever one of us are
free, then we'll go ahead and playtogether. Do you believe it's true
whenever people say that guys, likea man needs to get that phase out of
his system before he settles downthat, you know, I'm just going fuck a
bunch of women. Do you think thatit's that a man should get that over

(31:32):
with before settling down or?That's a, that's kind of a loaded
question or not even loaded, justhard for me to answer for other men
because everybody's going to bedifferent. In hindsight, I would
trade all of my experiences, allthese women that I've been with to
have one of those high schoolrelationships that they're, you
know, just each other's first andtogether for the past 20 plus years.

(31:56):
Yeah. And then that's, that's justme because I know I've been on both
sides of it. My wife that passed awaywhen we were together. I mean, we
were that hashtag relationshipgoals couple that everybody wanted
to be like and Vitas or wanted to fuckus. And so having that
relationship, I wish I could havehad that from high school onward.
And that was, you know, thehealthiest, best relationship

(32:19):
I've ever had. And so having thattype of relationship, having had
all the shit I've done throughout mylife with all the women I've had, I
would be okay with just one woman,but it takes more than just sex. It's
having the mental, spiritual,emotional maturity to be able to

(32:40):
have that because it's technicallyemotionally mature to want to have
sex with a bunch of women. And it'snot saying that it's wrong or
unhealthy is just more of, you know,you can have your, you can eat your
cake and have it too. If you approachthings the right way. I think it's
really important that you say thatand that people hear that from you

(33:00):
instead of me because you, you know,you fucked a thousand women, you
know, your previous sex addict.It's kind of like, it's like, if I
want to know, Hey, is it cool to be amovie star? I don't want to hear that
from you. I want to hear that from TomCruise. So to hear you say, Yeah,
man, you know, I would rather settledown with high school sweetheart is
really impactful. What did you feellike the day after your wife passed?

(33:27):
That I fell back into my bad habitsbecause it was, it was the, again,
the healthiest relationship I hadand that broke my heart. And, but
what was your emotions? Like, whatdid you feel like you woke up the day
after? What was your emotions? Whatwas your thoughts? She was in a car
accident. It was in a coma for a weekand she was technically brain dead

(33:48):
by the second day. So we had the wholefamily and everybody knew that she
was against that. She didn't want tobe a vegetable. She wanted to be the
plug, plug pooled. And we knew thisfrom the, like when we first started
dating, that was one of the firstconversations we had. Her family
knew about it. So we were waiting aweek for everybody to kind of be able
to come and kind of pay theirrespects. So it, it sucked and it was
painful to see her like that. Youknow, she had an arm and a cast. She

(34:15):
had a black eye cut, scrapes andbruises all over her. And so it was,
as a man, for me, an identity part ofit might be in a manner, manhood is
being able to protect your lovedones. And there was nothing I could

(34:36):
do for her. I wasn't a doctor. Therewasn't I can do to take her pain away.
There wasn't anything I can do to fixher. So that hurt me not just
emotionally, but also kind of feltlike an attack on my manhood that I
wasn't there to protect her. Iwasn't there to prevent this from
her. After she passed away, or, youknow, once we pulled the plug and her

(34:57):
heart stopped, it, um, there isn't away to, to put it into words other
than feeling an emptiness in mychest, because, you know, every
night I would, I would sing to her.I'd sing her some made up song, or I

(35:18):
make a parody of a song and just kindof, you know, just sing to her every
night. And we had a rule that we wouldnot go to bed angry at each other. And
we never did. We always hadconversations. The best thing
about the relationship was if shedidn't like something I did, or she
was upset at something that I did,she'd tell me, Hey, babe, you did
this a couple of days ago. I've beenthinking about it and I didn't like

(35:39):
it because blah, blah, blah. And soI'd sit and sitting on it and
realize, you know what, she'sright. That was fucked up with me or
it might be, well, I don't think it'sthat fucked up. Let's, let's talk
about this and figure out anotherway to deal with it. And so that's why
it was a healthiest relationshipfor me. And at the same time, having

(36:00):
her gone was just like, why do I needto be here? There's no point for me to
be here anymore. You know, she was myreason for being a better man. And so
within, I think two, three hours,I'd fucked one of her friends. Now,
to, to, holy fuck, we would havethree sons with women left and

(36:25):
right. We would have two or three,three sons a month. We'd had a couple
of four sons with other women. So itwasn't outside the realm. There's
people that knew that we were likethat. And we would invite some women
to come play with us from time totime. So some of these women were
people I'd already slept with.Others were women that, you know,

(36:47):
wanted to play with us or had heardrumors, but they weren't gay or bi or
interested in women. So they didn'twant to do anything. But now that I
was technically single, they wereall over it. So within the first 24
hours, I hooked up with four otherwomen just to feel something. It
wasn't even that I wanted to feelbetter. I just wanted to feel
something because I was like, youoften hear I was dead inside. I just

(37:10):
didn't give a shit about anything.And after that, I got tired, or not
even tired. I just didn't want tofall back into that bad habit and
just be a sex addict again. So I triedto force myself to be an alcoholic.
And yeah, you don't hear that everyday. Me being in my at the time I was in

(37:32):
my mid-30s and hangovers just suck.It just wasn't worth it anymore So I
just realized I need to go back andstart kind of getting back into the
program Working through myrecovery and then kind of get in a
better place. I was still fuckingaround Not as bad as when I was a
intercourse addict But more than Iwas after I realized what I was

(37:53):
doing. So I was getting about twogirls a week versus Only focusing on
women to have a relationship with soat that time that first six months
was me Trying to find someone toreplace her but then feeling guilty
for trying to replace her So it wasjust kind of like a little vicious
cycle of living that type of life Doyou think she was your soulmate? I

(38:16):
think so. Yeah We had you know petnicknames for each other we had Kind
of conversations about you know,why didn't I find you sooner? Why
didn't you come out here? Why didn'tthis or the other? but we were happy
with who we were and how we had ourrelationship because when we were
together We did more in the fouryears and 11 days we were together

(38:39):
than most married couples do in 20.We Very rarely stayed home When
first started dating we were livingin two different cities But we would
spend three-day weekends with eachother and it was like stay cations We
would either meet up in a small townhalfway between or I'd go to her
she'd come to me We go out basicallyevery night. We were together and
not going out drinking. I mean go outto like Gallas museum openings

(39:05):
divorce parties Whatever any typeof thing that just go out and
socialize So I think that's thereason or one of the reasons people
would see us as hashtagrelationship goals because we were
great together But we were finebeing alone. We could go to a party
arrive together mingle with newdifferent people make new friends
and You know at the end of the nightthen just leave together And we

(39:27):
didn't have to be we weren't thatcouple that had to be next to each
other Had to be touching eachother's hand or holding each
other's hand or whatever all thetime We could be fine on our own be the
life of the party and then just gohome and go do something else on our
own And eventually we kind of gottired. Hey man. We're we're getting
older. We can't keep this up all thetime So once a month we would have a D

(39:47):
&D game and after D &D We would have alittle potluck and then we'd have a
bonfire and either Karaoke I DJ or Iwould just we just hang out and just
enjoy the fire with friends So, youknow, even though we were taking it
easy one night a month. We were stilldoing stuff together and hosting
parties Man fuck this is beautifuldude. This sounds incredible. How

(40:11):
how do you deal with the fact that?I'm guessing no other woman will
ever Meet those type ofexpectations or those goals or that
type of bond you had with her It isdifficult because it's even harder
nowadays just find someone that'swilling to settle down with
Traditional gender roles becausethat's the type of relationship I

(40:33):
prefer. I don't like this Equalitystuff or yeah, I'm a boss bitch and I
can you give me a boss bitch overthere, but at home. I'm daddy I'm the
king you'll be my queen, but I ruleyou follow my rules and Some women
are into that but just for the kinkside but don't want to have a
relationship on it or other womenare Interested in the

(40:56):
relationship, but not into kink soit's more of just difficulty
finding a woman that's going to beinto that and that's also the way or
the reason I date the way I do I datemultiple women at once and I
wouldn't even commit or settle downto one until We've been seeing each
other for about a year because I wantto see how they behave Around
Christmas and around Valentine'sbecause I don't celebrate either

(41:18):
for Valentine's I do a thing I callvaloine which is like second
Halloween for Valentine's Day havea little party there and Christmas
I'm just against it for a bunch ofother reasons, but The only thing I
enjoy is just black Friday so I canbuy myself cheap stuff, but So yeah,
it's difficult to find a woman I'dlike to settle down, but the problem

(41:38):
is it's hard to find women that are onthat level or even want that type of
relationship Why aren't youagainst just all holidays then? Oh,
no, why those two? So Valentine's Iwith my wife It was just kind of an
example of we don't have tocelebrate or show how much we love
each other one day out of the year Wedid it every day and then with
Christmas my thing against it isChristmas has nothing to do with

(42:01):
Christ other than having Christ inthe name And I'm not a huge
Christian. I mean I am a Christian,but I'm more of that's my religion
That's my belief, but I'm not goingto expel Doctrine or you know say oh
you're a bad person because you'renot a Christian you do you I'm gonna
do me But my relationship with God ismine and so with Christmas. It's

(42:22):
we're celebrating with Santa ClausNobody really talks about Christ.
We're talking about a fat burglarcoming into your house And if you're
They'll get a present right you trythat burglar kids is a burglar. He's
fucking breaking into your house,right? Going down your chimney
exactly or however he gets in but thepoint is we're teaching our kids to

(42:42):
behave based on a lie and then we getsurprised when our kids don't want
to go to church because you know a lotof Christian Celebrations are
based on lies and you know the churchdoesn't get why we don't have more
kids staying in Church or not comingback or whatever So there's there's
a bunch of reasons or that's just oneof the bigger ones that I don't like

(43:04):
Christmas I even have an episode onthat too about why I hate Christmas
Christmas Yeah, I've heard a lot ofpeople and I kind of think of it too I
I'm ashamed to admit that it took memany years to think of it like this
But it seems like a lot of holidaysand Christmas being the biggest one
It's just an excuse for companies togo into our pocket and get fucking

(43:25):
all kind of money from us and shitlike that I'm and you're right. It is
for example Christmas is all aboutyou know It's supposed to be like
about the birth of Jesus No one talksabout that even like 4th of July and
stuff like that is supposed to beabout our country our independence
No one talks about that. We haveMemorial Day in a little while It
just seems like it's oh, it's aholiday go by a bunch of shit What

(43:49):
what was the best single moment ofyour life? Life Single moment so not
like a year I'm guessing for IGuessing it would be sex because I
don't know but but because if I wereto ask like a meth addict What was
your best moment? He would probablytell me the first time I took meth

(44:11):
right because you can't beatfucking drugs No, I think the best
moment was And it's kind of like moreof a feeling but the best moment was
When my daughter was you know superproud of me in elementary This was
before her mom started kind of myfirst wife started Kind of bad

(44:34):
mouthing me to her Because she wasmad at me and couldn't do anything to
hurt my feelings or piss me off But upuntil before that point, you know
for my daughter. I was her Supermanlike I could do no wrong She was
always excited for me to go to schoolbecause at the time I work nights So I
would go to like all her field tripsand field days and be a chaperone and

(44:55):
stuff And so I would carry Coolersfull of ice and drinks, you know on my
shoulders and they're like, oh man.He's so strong. Well your daddy She
was like, yeah, that's my daddy.That's my daddy. So for me that was
like the best feeling so Once my wifeand I got divorced You know, I
haven't talked to my daughter sinceshe just won't talk to me anymore

(45:17):
because everything my wife saidYeah, that is kind of fucked up but
That's also why I enjoy Thedaddy-dom little girl
relationship because it's notsexual. It can be sexual but for me I
get the enjoyment of someone seeingme as a Superman and that's the You
know me trying to replace thosefeelings and for me kink in general

(45:38):
is kind of like the poor man'sTherapy because you're dealing
with whatever traumas or issues youhave in your life in a sexual manner
So you can either normalize yourfeelings or you can get past
whatever is going on But that's justa way for someone to release. It
doesn't have to be sexual It doesn'thave to be Penetrative for sexually
penetrative, but it can be sexuallycharged and still be enjoyable for

(46:00):
you to Get some type of satisfactionor get that feeling of goodness that
you need in your life to fill thatemptiness because you know Mental
health isn't as an important thingas I think it should be now It's
getting better, but for the mostpart just to look kind of a stigma
with mental health isn't that crazyas shit that You can essentially

(46:23):
brainwash a little kid and tobelieve in whatever you want and
that this is weaponized usuallyagainst like, you know parents who
are fell out of favor with the otherone like how did that shit feel that
had to Feel super helpless To be tohave your daughter I'm sure you
loved her more than anything andthen to know that she's not with you

(46:44):
But she's kind of being brainwashedin a way against you At first I didn't
care at first like that wasn't evenon my mind because you know, I
Assumed that she didn't want to talkto me because you know She was mad
that I wasn't in the house that shewasn't she was mad that I wasn't

(47:04):
around like that That was my initialthought and at the time I was still an
intercourse addict. I didn't evenknow I was So I was like, oh fuck it
now. I can go do whatever I want. Idon't have to worry about getting
caught I don't have to worry abouthiding my phone. I don't have to
worry about this that the other I cango buck wild and do what I want again
So that was my initial thought itwasn't until Maybe two months, but

(47:27):
as you know what I haven't heard frommy daughter like I haven't talked to
her and I felt guilty like shit Ihadn't reached out to her. I hadn't
done anything So when I tried to talkto her, you know, she just wouldn't
respond she wouldn't talk to meshe'd hang up the phone whatever and
I didn't get it. So I talked to my wifebecause we were We weren't civil at
that point We would talk because wehad to for one reason or another But

(47:49):
it was you know, I don't know whyshe's mad at you. I don't know what
you should probably go talk to herLike how am I gonna talk to her? She's
not listening. Let me you know Canyou put on the phone? And so she was
kind of egging it on and kind ofthrowing in my face and Eventually
You know once we kind of had a had itout before we got the divorce
finalized She said yeah, I told hereverything that you did because she

(48:09):
needs to know what type of man herfather is like What does it have to do
your relationship in mind hasnothing to do with my daughter's
relationship? Like I could still bea good father to her even though it
was an asshole to you and so it's beenThis is a problem or you know shitty
life Fuck man. Do you think that sexaddiction is more destructive than

(48:30):
drug addiction? It depends on howDeep one or the other is With drug
addiction, I mean either die or Youcome close to dying and realize I
need to change something with sexaddiction It can't I think it could
be worse because You don't even knowyou have a problem. You don't even
know it is a problem Until you know atsome point Hopefully you get a

(48:55):
revelation because you're notgonna OD on sex you might catch you
know the hiv you might catch You knowwhatever type of STI and well now you
got to live with it But even thenthat's not gonna stop you like oh
shit Maybe I should change my waysbecause if you get the hiv well, it's
too late. You know yeah now you'refucked But you know herpes or
anything else that you have well,you know, you can live with it You can
still have sex you can still havepartners just be honest with them

(49:17):
whatever so it is It can't be moredestructive in the sense that you
don't even realize it's a problemversus losing your life So it's kind
of you know Six of one thing havedoesn't have another just depends
on how you look at it Yeah, that's agood point and and that that's kind
of what I was thinking because I wastrying to put myself in your shoes
and I don't even I don't think itwould ever really click to me that it

(49:41):
is a problem like oh, you know I'mjust hey. I'm just having lots of
sex. We when did it click for you? Wasthere a moment? yeah so after my
divorce I You know got on datingwebsites because this is 2010 so
there's still smartphones, butthere wasn't as many apps there as
there are now. And anyways, I metthis girl and we were talking, we

(50:07):
hooked up a couple of times with thatfor some reason, something told me,
you know what, she's gonna be a goodfriend, don't fuck it up. So just be
friends with her. And she was acodependent food addict and love
addict. And she was going to what'scalled Celebrate Recovery. And
Celebrate Recovery is a Christianbased, essentially like AA, SAA,

(50:28):
NA, all the anonymous that are outthere, but all in one place. And the
way it works is everybody comes inmale and female, comes to a big
group, and they'll have some type ofBible reading, or someone will
share their testimony, or someonewill read a testimony from someone
from another location, becauseit's a, I know it's nationwide, it

(50:49):
might be international group that,you know, hosts these things. And
they're always in a church. So it'skind of Christian based. But they
don't try to force you, oh, you haveto come to this church or whatever,
because they're across all thenominations, it's any church that
again, that'll host them. And so allthey ask is that you don't trash

(51:11):
talk, you know, God or, you know,make fun of it, just, you know, go
there and enjoy. No one's gonna tryto make you come to church, no one's
gonna try to you convert, is justacknowledge that it's a Christian
based thing. So you're going intothat with your eyes open. And so
after that little reading, orwhatever they have going on, then
everybody breaks off into theirgroups by sex. So females go on one

(51:31):
side, males go on another. Anddepending on what your addiction
is, whether it's, you know, drugs,alcohol, sex, love, food,
co-dependency, whatever. Womenhave more of the emotional stuff,
guys have more of the, the chemicalstuff, the drugs and alcohol. Other
women, there are women that havealcohol addictions, but anyways,
in those groups, I was going to theSex Attics one, and she would go to

(51:55):
whichever one was she needed helpwith that week. And the reason I was
going is because beforehand, wewould hang out whenever she was
getting off of those things,because she'd go two or three nights
a week. And so for us to hang out, I hadto wait for her to be done. And a lot of
times she wouldn't even get out tolike 10 o'clock at night, because
she couldn't say no, I got to go. Shewas too much of a people pleaser. So

(52:17):
she would do this, get stuck hangingaround, listen to someone sob
story, or get roped into helpingcleaning up or whatever. So the
reason I went was just to like, oh,hey, we got to go, we're going to
catch this movie and it starts at 9o'clock, we'll see you next week.
And I just went to the Sex Attic one,because well, I'm not an alcoholic,
I'm not a drunk, I'm not into, youknow, drugs, I don't do anything
else. So fuck it, I'll go to the SexAttics group. The Sex Attics group,

(52:40):
most of the guys in there would talkabout either being addicted to
porn, or addicted to talking to sexworkers, and just trying to talk
dirty to them, because they couldtalk dirty to a sex worker, and they
wouldn't get slapped like theywould with a normal woman. And so I
was like, oh, yeah, I masturbatedtwice today. Watch porn, right?

(53:03):
Just trying to play a long play therole. And I think it was after about a
month that I was going, this guyshared his story, he shared his
testimony of being a drug addict.And when he was sharing his story, I
was actually paying attention. Andall the reasons he gave, you know,
he's, you know, having a bad day,getting to fight with his wife, X, Y,

(53:23):
and Z, all the reasons he gave werethe same reasons I used to have sex.
And it was just like each time he saidit, he's kind of giving me like a stab
in the heart, like, hey, payattention, pay attention. And it
was just surprising for me to like,oh, shit, sex addiction,
intercourse addiction is a realthing. And crap, that's me. And so

(53:44):
that was a little scary, and alsokind of a reality check that I fucked
up a lot of things in my life becauseI'm an intercourse addict. And so it
took me probably a good day or two tosay, okay, now I need to fix this, how
do I fix this? And of course, I wasgoing to all these groups, because

(54:05):
we wouldn't just go to one, we wouldgo to different locations, we'd go
two, three times a week, but youcould go seven days a week all across
Houston to different celebraterecovery groups. And, you know,
I've been to all of them and been toall of these sex addicts who are so
like, well, shit, it's not like I cango just on Fridays or just on
Thursdays to this one place,because they don't know me there.

(54:26):
All of them knew me, all of them knewthat I'd said I was a porn addict. And
so I was a little embarrassed to say,hey, guys, actually, I'm a sex
addict, but I thought you guys arelame. And I didn't want to say that I
didn't realize I was. So luckily, Ihad a health plan. So I saw my
therapist or, you know, went andfound some therapists to try to see

(54:46):
what I could do to fix it. But withtherapists, for me, they were too
clinical. For me, it was like, thedifference between electrical
engineer and electrician.Electrical engineer knows
everything that you need to do theircode and how it's supposed to work to
build a house or build a building, orthe electrical components that go
into it. They have no idea how to putit on or how to put it together or how

(55:08):
to wire anything, right? As anelectrician, I have that practical
knowledge. So for me, it was like,I'm an electrician, I'm a sex
addict, I know how to do things.You're just this clinician that
knows by the book how things happen,how things kind of work and, you
know, the proper terms for things,but you don't know how to do what I do.
So I couldn't connect with them. Icouldn't respect them. I couldn't
listen to their advice because,yeah, sure, whatever, you don't

(55:31):
know what you're talking about.Yeah. So I switched over to SAA, Sex
Addict Anonymous. And in there, atleast in the two groups that I went
to, and I tried different times ofdays and different, or two
different locations, butdifferent times of day, different
meetings that they had, and almostall of them were just kind of the same
thing. Yeah, man. I didn't have anysex today. And I felt like I wanted to

(55:54):
have sex, but I called my sponsor andwe sat down and talked about it. And I
told them this kind of sex stuff thatI wanted to do, but I shouldn't
because I don't want to disappointthem. And I don't want to disappoint
you guys and blah, blah, blah, blah,blah, and sex, sex, sex, sex, sex,
sex, sex, you know, they weren'taddressing their issues. They were
just talking about not wanting todisappoint someone or let someone
else down. So it was more of living upto a standard, not fixing the root

(56:16):
cause. And so I said, fuck it, let megive Celebrate Recovery a try
again. And went there, startedworking through there. And in it,
when you're in the smaller groups,when they see that you really do want
to fix your problems, you getinvited into what's called a small
step study group or a step studygroup. And you work through the
steps. And the steps areessentially designed through

(56:39):
booklets. And you know, asking youimportant questions, or asking you
random questions, like, you know,when you get mad, what do you feel? Or
when you get angry, what's thecause? And when was the first time
you ever feeling this? So kind of anexample is, you know, if you get
angry, because some co worker, youknow, snarky, and he had to tell you,
yeah, that's what she said,dumbass. And so it's not that they
called you dumbass, it's not thatthey talk back to you. You're just

(57:00):
angry because it reminds you of atone, your aunt, your grandmother,
your cousin, your father, somebodyused when you were a kid. And you
couldn't do anything about itbecause you're a kid, because you
can't talk back to them, you got torespect them. So you're harboring
this anger from childhood. And it'sbasically because of the tone, not
because of what was said. So youranger kind of goes back, you know,
further than the instance, becausethere's nothing about it that

(57:23):
should make you mad. And so it's kindof those things of learning how to
deal with different types ofsituations, because you're going
back and addressing issues you'vehad growing up. So that's how I kind
of worked through all of this. And inthat, I kind of stayed sober, quote
unquote, where I didn't have sex forjust shy of six months. And after
that, my first one, I hooked up withthis girl that I was kind of talking

(57:46):
to and trying to hook up with back inthe day, but I kind of blew it because
I did the stupid thing and listeningto her conversation about what she
looks for in a guy. And I was like, I'mbad, you're describing me, we
should be boyfriend andgirlfriend. As soon as I said it, I
know I fucked up. And so I just kind ofkept her at bay and over time,
eventually we ended up hooking upJuly 4th, 2012. So anyways, Damn.

(58:08):
Yeah, what do you think about kind ofthis whole, like mental health
thing, right? So suicide rates aregoing up, depression rates are
going up, mental illness is goingup, everybody's fucking sad as shit
all the time. You know, my opinionare my loosely held belief or or just
back of the the napkin type of math onthis. And and I'm open to being wrong

(58:29):
is that I think in today's world, wejust don't have real fucking
problems. You know, people, youpress a button, you get shit
delivered straight to you, you go tothe grocery store, you don't have to
go grow the rice yourself, you justbuy some fucking rice and eggplants
and shit like that. You don't have tokill the cow, you don't have to kill
the you don't have a fucking liontrying to eat you or nothing like

(58:50):
that. And for example, if you lookat, for example, tribes, like
native tribes in the Amazon, theirsuicide rate and depression rate is
zero. Like they don't evenunderstand the concept. I think
I've seen a YouTube video, this guysaid he went contact one of these
tribes and I guess they werefriendly to outsiders. But this was

(59:12):
a hunter gatherer tribe, right?They were fucking naked. They kill
monkeys, they eat them with sticks.I mean, they don't have technology.
And he's like, what is your biggestfear in life? Right? Like this big
philosophical question, what'syour biggest fear? And he said
lions, I'm scared of lions. And thenhe asks this dude, he says, Oh, okay,

(59:32):
okay, that's that's really cool.What do you think? Where do you think
you go when you die? Like these bigphilosophical questions that we
worry about here in the States. Andthis guy said, we put them in a hole
that that's where you go when youdie. That that's it. And I think that
this like, we just don't haveproblems in in the world, bro. And
people are just like making up shit,they're sitting on their hands. And

(59:54):
their brain just goes fuckinghaywire. I think that's what's
happened. What do you think? That'sa loaded question. So, oh, man, let
it rip, dude, let it rip. One hand, Iunderstand the need for mental
health, because it makes us betterindividuals. On the other, I think

(01:00:14):
part of the problem is parenting.This overprotection, a lot of this
is and I'm guessing I'm I'mextrapolating and making a lot of
assumptions that a lot of ourproblems society is the parents we
have nowadays are not the parents wehad growing up. You know, for for Gen
Xers, I mean, fuck it, sink or swimbitch, fuck you, like, you know,

(01:00:35):
whatever. And for these other kids,younger millennials, I think elder
millennials have kind of had alittle bit of that. But younger
millennials, you know, oh, Timmy,take care of yourself. And don't
forget this, don't forget that. Soyou're you're you're put a lot of
pressure to not think about thingsand have a lot of pressure on you to
have these expectations. And soit's not. Hey, just real quick, you

(01:00:59):
know, what's crazy about that isthat the helicopter parent that
you're describing, and Icompletely agree, it goes
completely against everystatistic. Kids are safer, like
orders of magnitude more safenowadays, that we have helicopter
parents, then they were in thefucking 70s and 80s, like kids were
getting picked up, like 10 timesmore molested 10 times more killed

(01:01:22):
10 times more back then than they arenow. But now we helicopter parent is
fucking crazy. And that's more of anAmerican thing, I think, because I
have a friend. Fuck, was it Finland?He went to up there. It's not Sweden,
Swedish is IKEA. He's not an IKEAcountry, but he's in one of those two
up there. He's whatever's north ofEstonia. He went over there. And

(01:01:45):
he'd been living there. And he wasgoing walking his way walking to
work. And he saw these two kids in atree. One was a girl that was I think
she's like five feet high. And therewere both like five or six years old,
like they were small children. Thegirl was sitting on the tree and she
was whittling with the knife. Andthe boy was down near the top, which
who knows how high it was, he said itlooked like it was 50 feet, who knows

(01:02:05):
how tall it was, but it was prettyhigh up there for a kid. And he's over
there freaking out and trying totalk to them his Finnish, or
Swedish, or whatever fuckinglanguage it was, it wasn't that
good. And he's trying tocommunicate communicate to them
like, Hey, get down, you know, becareful, do you need me to help you
down, blah, blah, blah. And he'skind of started starting a

(01:02:25):
commotion causing a scene whereother Finnish people are coming
around. And I think it was like thethird or fourth person finally
understood enough English where hecould communicate with them to
communicate that he was worriedabout these kids that could hurt
themselves, right and The the I'mguessing finish. I'm gonna stick
with finish the finished personsaid They got up there. They can come

(01:02:48):
down like they get themselves upthere They'll get themselves down
and then he was like, but she has aknife He's like, yeah, she knows
which side is sharp as she cutherself And so that blew his mind and
it kind of changes perspective oflike hey, we worry too much about
kids and you know My parenting stylethere's there's a cartoon of like
Kangaroo and like I'll hold you mypouch until you're ready to go out

(01:03:12):
into the world and there's Polarbear and I'll teach you how to be a
bear and take you around the worldand Those are the things and then you
see a bird and he just kicks him outthe nest fly bitch Like that's my
parenting style like figured outfly or die. I don't care but Going
back to your question about likemental health and suicide rates I

(01:03:32):
Have a disdain for suicides like IAnd this is something I need to
change or kind of work on but I I feellike if you kill yourself like a You
you fuck up your family because youknow your parents your siblings
your kids whoever is above or belowyou That's still around like that
fucks with the mentally like youfuck up their lives one. Yeah, two

(01:03:56):
You're that much of a pussy that youcan't handle the problems air
quotes that are in this worldThere's nothing out there trying to
kill you actively Sure, you might goto bat-side of town get mugged and
killed but Generally mostcivilians aren't gonna get killed
or murdered in their day-to-daylives unless he has some kind of
psycho X or Some type of situationthat they put themselves in but by

(01:04:17):
and large We can expect to live to 70or 80 years old like those Amazon
tribes that you're talking about orany indigenous peoples That still
live off the land their lifeexpectancy is a little bit lower
because they're always out in thealms because of the way they live
It's lower, but they're happier ingeneral and we over here we're
trying to find all these things andwe have this technology and also the

(01:04:38):
crap and You got to be a little bitchwith your life and kill yourself
because it's too hard so on thatsense Fuck them like I don't respect
any suicide Their body of work. I'mtalking about celebrities too.
Like, you know celebrity suicidesf-sintin kills off But with with

(01:04:59):
mental health, I do think it'simportant to Get people to get to a
better place so they're moreself-resilient and more resilient
but I think that starts withparenting and teaching kids to be
Self-sufficient and self-reliantversus doing everything for them
and then they hit the real world andcan't do shit for themselves
because oh my god It's too much workto call dominoes in place and order

(01:05:21):
which you can do with it now. So whatthe fuck is your problem? Hey, you
don't have to come off that suicidetake dude. Fuck them. Fuck them
because hmm that's But because if aperson is really contemplating
suicide the worst thing you couldtell him is you know Fuck you you soft
bitch, right? That's the resthonestly the worst thing you could

(01:05:43):
tell him right is the worst thing Soif you're contemplating suicide
don't go kill yourself But do youmake a great point and it's an
original thought so fuck them No onthat note. I think suicide hotline
should be how to do it without makinga mess fuck calling Please tell me
not to kill myself. I want to I needattention. Fuck you do it your

(01:06:05):
little bitch. You don't have theballs Yo, this a this is so you're
wasting my air do it hurry up Yeah,maybe Maybe we should rework it
instead of like the suicide hotlineit should be like we give you like
here's the best way to kill yourselfBro, are you in the pain? Cut your

(01:06:28):
wrists. You don't want pain. Youjust want to go blow your brains out
But so so we met on reddit reddit haslike suicide like I'm thinking
about suicide subreddits, right?And if you go on these Dells like a guy
will make a post and he'll sayalright. This is it tomorrow. It's
over sorry and everybody Oh my gosh,don't do it Someone loves you out

(01:06:51):
there and you see this post was made ayear ago. They made the same post
yesterday It's like so not only didyou not kill yourself but you're
continually doing it and I think youhit it on the head bro. It's
attention now. Hey, don't get mewrong there's some crazy-ass
people out there like who's legitlike mentally fucking ill and Like

(01:07:12):
these people they'll killthemselves and that fucking sucks
But I think most of it is like someneedy ass Teenagers mostly young
people. Let's just call it what itis. It's young people. It's people
my age or younger Who are just outthere and they just like, you know
what? I didn't get enough attentionand You know what? I'm not pretty so I

(01:07:34):
can't get attention from otherpeople. I'm not talented I can't get
attention from other people. I'mnot smart. So I'm gonna kill myself
or else So crazy shit dude. Yeah, Imean it's it's annoying because You
know, there are people that wouldkill for the opportunities that
most people have in theindustrialized world There are
people in Latin America in SouthAmerica That would love to just live

(01:08:00):
in your house. They don't even needthe food you have They'll go get
their own whatever they need to dojust to be able to have a house as nice
as yours To have a TV like just mm-hmmall those different things that we
have in our life And oh it sucks my momwon't let me go to my boyfriend's
house and suck his dick You know fuckI can go in the backyard do
something. Don't go be a whoresomewhere else whatever Yeah, man,

(01:08:22):
this is a good point too And this thisjust goes to show that like
environment matters because Ithink the average person in the
world lives on like less than adollar a day Right, I mean a little
more and so how man on that point manWe're gonna run against the
conspiracy theories now. So fuck.Yeah, I think Russia and China have
it right and I'm not talking aboutlike the the way Society is or Putin

(01:08:45):
or you know, whatever is over thereI'm thinking more of how their
societies are the average Russiantheir Maximum debt like the the
average debt for a Russian is $20 20US dollars. Oh, I didn't know that
for perspective, I mean they'realso living on Depending on what
city they're in but between 15 to 40dollars a day is what they need to

(01:09:09):
live on and we're talking about alltheir meals and their utilities and
their home, right and That'sbecause they don't have a central
bank like we have with theinternational bank the the banking
system that we have in the world and Ithink a lot of our wars are to make
people fall under the same one ruleand For whatever reason Americans

(01:09:31):
in the western civilizationbelieve that inflation is okay
inflation is right And that's whyChinese labor is so cheap because
they don't have to raise theirprices They don't have inflation
because they don't have a world bankartificially inflating the prices
of things adding too much money anddevaluing it devaluing their
Currency, you know, our currency isworth less now than it's ever been,

(01:09:53):
you know back in the 30s You can buy ahouse for I think it was like two
thousand dollars and Inflationkeeps going up and up and oh no,
that's the way the economy works.No, it doesn't have to we could still
live off of You know a few thousanddollars a year Because back then the
money was backed by gold now. It'sjust based off of a whole bunch of
other tech that goes behind it Buttoo much to get into it now And so I

(01:10:15):
think those countries are happierbecause they don't have their debt
because they can live a Sustainablelife with you know, just a few
dollars a day or a couple hundreddollars a week versus us We got to
have a couple hundred dollars a dayand we got to have the newest cell
phone We have to have the newestiPhone or the newest Samsung or
whatever to be happy with our liveswhen you can look at other countries

(01:10:37):
and For the most part they're happyor they're content with their
lives. They're not missing out andin a sense It kind of falls into
ignorance is bliss if you don't knowyou're missing out on something
Then you don't know you're not happylike with those indigenous tribes
Yeah, the indigenous tribes are agreat point. I I think people should
talk more about that because thesepeople are happy as fuck So how is

(01:10:57):
Inflation so bad. So is it so let'sjust talk about bread. Let's just
keep it simple So bread goes up 20 % ifmy salary goes up 20 % as well Isn't
that all good or you're sayingthat's not happening. That's not
happening. No What's the last timeyou got a race? Like like it like

(01:11:17):
every year usually but I listen Ihave like one of the best jobs in the
world I get paid way too much. I'm nota good example, but whenever I
worked at McDonald's I would get IWorked at McDonald's for like four
years flipping burgers. I would getlike a nickel raise Every year which
is nothing Inflation on average isthree to four percent every year in

(01:11:40):
the US since 1930 you shit 33 32 Eversince we started recovering from
the Great Depression so every year 3% so 1933 a dollar is now worth 97
cents and Keeps going that waydividing, you know, three
subtracting 3 % off of that everyyear until nowadays Or you can use

(01:12:03):
one of those internet calculators.I think it's called 2013 dollar
calculator where you put in a datepast date and the current date and
it'll say a hundred dollars back in1883 is worth, you know $7,000
nowadays or whatever you just dowhatever you want to use so if you're

(01:12:23):
only making five cents a year That'snot even a percent because you're if
you're making an minimum wage anddepending on eight bucks Okay,
eight bucks. That's not even onepercent five cents is not one
percent of your salary So you'regetting less than inflation so
every year you're working atMcDonald's not getting a 3 % raise
you're losing money. So when you goto buy that that Loaf of bread and

(01:12:49):
gallon of milk, you know your firstyear you could buy it off of $1 wages
after taxes Your next year it takesyou an hour and 15 minutes to buy that
milk and buy that bread Four yearslater. It takes you three hours to
buy milk and bread and so, you knowYou're exchanging time for money.
So that doesn't even doesn't evencompute. So of course Life sucks now

(01:13:12):
people have to have two differentjobs and people want $15 an hour for
minimum wage, which That's a wholeother thing. I'm not against
raising the minimum wage But I'magainst people staying at
McDonald's for 15 20 yearsexpecting to get $30 an hour And
that's using and not having anyskills to back it up. Oh, yeah, a
hundred percent I mean that that'scommon sense people who make the

(01:13:33):
opposing argument. I mean thatThat's completely that's like
calling the sky purple. It's okay.You think that cool go over there But
yeah, so I see what you're sayingbecause the flip side is is you could
just demonize the company say heyMan, what the fuck inflation went up
5 % why didn't all the companies get 5% raises their shithole people? But

(01:13:56):
from their perspective, I can kindof understand it, right? It's like
damn you can't expect me to keep upwith the central bank every fucking
year So you're saying that hey if thecentral bank Just stops inflation
then hey everything's good.There's no more action needed for
everybody to be good to go Yes, but todo that you'd have to Remove the

(01:14:18):
central bank or at least in the US theFederal Reserve, which is not a US
government entity It's a privatebank They have absolutely nothing
to do with the US government otherthan having to contract to print
money How did that shit happen whatwhat what the fuck is this dude?
That's so weird I'll just tell tellyou and your listeners to Google the
creature from Jekyll Island it allstarted with or JP Morgan Chase and a

(01:14:44):
couple other people congressmanback in 18 something and they
created the federal bank and alsoit's in concert with the US income
tax before only corporations gottaxed and corporations banks
convince the US government, hey,you can get more money to tax people
as well, create a tax code. So webecame money for the government,

(01:15:08):
19, shit, 30 something somewhere inthere. At the same time as the
central bank, we got the IRS createdand all those other things, because
before then, we funded roads and wefunded everything that needed to be
done through the US government justby the US government itself. They
didn't have to tax people. They weretaxing the corporations, and there
weren't that many corporations tobegin with. Yeah, that's a good

(01:15:30):
point. I fucking hate taxes. Andhere's why. It's not because,
listen, it's not because I'm afucking pig, right? I don't want to,
you know, I want roads. I wantnational parks. I want, you know, to
help old people or whatever withMedicare or whatever. Like this is
all great. Here's why I hate taxes.It's like a thug, right? It's like a

(01:15:52):
thug comes up to me and I'm in school,right? I'm let's say I'm in like
sixth grade. He's bigger than me. Hesays, Hey, bitch, give me your lunch
money. And I'll just give him mymoney. All right, here you go, man.
I'm fucking scared. I don't, youknow, don't fucking hit me. I don't
know what he did with my lunch money.It doesn't even matter. There's
nothing I could do about it, right?There's nothing I could do. That's
what I feel like happens, man. Youget that check, half the checks

(01:16:15):
gone. Where did it go? Nobodyfucking knows. All right, well, let
me call somebody and figure outwhere it went. Nope, that doesn't.
Nope. I have no clue. It's like, allright, cool. So it went to write
taxes, help with like, you know,roads and like fucking mental
health facilities and hospital.Bro, my roads are shit. OK, the
hospitals are shit. Traffic shit.It's like, what the fuck is

(01:16:39):
happening? It's like, it's like thebully. It's just like, hey, give me
that shit. I'm going to do what I wantwith it. Fuck you. It's like, man, I
don't even know where none of thisshit's going. I would like to at
least this is what I would like. OK,we took a hundred dollars from you,
Chris, for your taxes. Ten dollarswent to fix a second street around
the corner. Another twenty buckswent to give the teachers ten

(01:17:01):
dollars raise. Forty bucks went tohelp build this. Like, at least I can
feel decent about myself. But,dude, I have no fucking clue where
this shit goes. How do people pass?Like, how are people OK with this?
People don't get together and votefor elected officials that will do

(01:17:21):
things for them to keep voting forthe incumbent. And, you know, the
people that vote are few and farbetween. There's not that. So, for
example, like in Texas, you know,they've got a shitty government.
And I can say that for Texas. But the,you know, it's a red state. And to
flip that states going to be nearlyimpossible. Because even though

(01:17:41):
you have three of the sorry, two ofthe top ten populated cities in the
U.S., Houston and Dallas, even withSan Antonio and Austin, those
cities are usually blue. But theentire state of Texas is so large and
red that, you know, yeah, you want tovote for a Democrat that's going to
take care of, you know, women'srights or women's health issues,

(01:18:03):
like abortion and not take thingsoff the table. And, you know,
actually improve the nationalgrid. But because that Democrat
mentioned that he wants to enforcesome some type of gun control, not
even explaining what he wanted todo. Just mentioned it. The state
said, fuck you. We're going to keepour red governor. We don't care. And
so on that note with how our moneygoes, it's a different way to see it.

(01:18:27):
Instead of seeing it as a bully, it'skind of seeing it as you're giving
someone a loan. You know, you'reyou're loaning someone a little bit
of your money, every paycheck. Andat the end of the year, when you know
that loan is up, you know, when you doyour file, your taxes, now you got to
go to that loan person that youloaned to them and tell them, hey, I
need that money back. And here are myreasons why when you do your

(01:18:50):
deductions and do your little maththat you got to do for your taxes, you
got to prove to the person that youloaned money to why you need your
money back. And they'll say, OK,most of this is right. OK, we'll give
you 90 percent of what you gave us. Orwe'll actually you owe us more money
because you didn't give us enough.So what I do is I file for exempt
whenever I hire onto a job. You can dothere's a section where you can

(01:19:12):
click essentially exempt fromtaxes that you will do all your money
back the previous year and you'll bedo all your money back this current
year. And so all they'll take is FICAMedicare and something else. I
forget what it is, but it's likethree things. And on a three
thousand dollar check, I only getlike two fifty taken out. Damn, you

(01:19:35):
know, that's fucking excellent,actually. But doesn't this kind of
just expose that us humans orAmericans or whatever? Like we're
just so easily manipulated by wordsand shit like that. Also,
government is so complex thatnobody fucking understands it all.
Right. They pass these bills likeone a week. They're like four
thousand pages long because Ithink, for example, I think Barack

(01:19:59):
Obama is probably the mostcharismatic president we've had,
unless maybe you could call Trump,but Trump's a bit abrasive. But I
think Obama could have been fuckingeverybody's wife and they still
would have voted for him, right? Hecould have been I mean, he could have
been banging out your wife, but hewas just so charismatic and that's
what wins. So how do we fix this toactually like solve problems

(01:20:23):
instead of voting in the person whojust kind of like strokes us with his
words? Um, I would think my idea orideal situation would be one.
Everybody can vote from theirphone. You can only have one cell
phone based on your. It's a greatidea. Everybody gets to vote that
way instead of having to go and getregistered and have, you know, all

(01:20:44):
these voter fraud things thatthey're talking about and all those
other situations. Some I think aretrue. Some have some points and some
might be fake. I don't know. But toavoid that kind of thing, if you're a
U.S. citizen, you get to voteregardless of whether you're a
felon or not. I think you should beable to still vote. Yes. Because the
whole idea is, OK, you go pay yourdebts at the society. But when you

(01:21:05):
come out as a felon, you still got abunch of strikes against you. You
still have your criminal recordthat people can look up. You can't
vote. There's a bunch of otherthings that make it harder for you to
have a life outside of prison onceyou come back out. So then what's the
point of being out here? Just go anddo crime. But anyways, so one,
everybody gets to vote on theirphones. Two, instead of having
presidential debates and beingswayed by video and charisma,

(01:21:28):
having someone do like a singleparagraph as president, I would do
one, two and three and have that andeverybody gets to vote based off of
that versus being swayed by looksbecause traditionally, at least up
until Obama, more often than not,the younger, better looking
candidate always wins thepresidency. Oh, shit. I didn't know

(01:21:50):
that goes all the way back to JFK.That was a good looking man,
supposedly. Yeah, that's sointeresting. You said that because
the plan that you just laid out isessentially the one I kind of
thought of as well one day, which isfun. Fucking crazy. I think
exactly. I think you should have, Idon't know, let's just call it like

(01:22:12):
red, white and blue app on yourphone, swayed by the government.
You vote on that. And before youvote, you could just like scroll
profiles, kind of like a like aFacebook profile and just like what
you said. Yeah, have askedpresident, I'm going to do these
three things. Don't have partyparty affiliations on it. Don't

(01:22:33):
have any other things that will givethem credibility. Like, for
example, oh, I was a senator for 13years. I passed this or anything.
Just tell me what the fuck you'regoing to do. I don't even need to know
your name to be honest. You couldgive me a fake name. I don't give a
shit. And that way you're 100percent right. I think that would
that would fix it all. But I think weboth know that this probably won't

(01:22:55):
happen. No, it's a lot. Do you want togo to a strange place with me? Are you
in that type of mood today? Yeah, wedo whatever. I mean, I got plenty of
time. I'm free for the rest of theday. Bro, all right, let's go to a
strange place. OK, I don't know why,but my brain really deals in
hypotheticals a lot. I find otherpeople's brain doesn't. But here's

(01:23:18):
a hypothetical for you. OK, allright. It's World War Two. It's the
height of World War Two. You live inGermany. You are a Jew, some Anne
Frank type shit, right? You'rehiding. You get somebody busing
your door or whatever. Oh, no, youknow, they you're terrified,

(01:23:40):
obviously. If anybody bussing yourdoor, you're terrified. You get
summoned. They say, hey, listen,listen, listen, no, it's OK. We are
from the German. We are Germansoldiers. We're not going to hurt
you. We're not going to hurt you.Adolf Hitler wants to talk to you,
Gayo. He wants to meet you. It's avery important thing. We're not
going to kill you. And let's just sayhypothetically, you believe that

(01:24:03):
they're not going to kill you.Because let's be honest, you don't
have a choice at this point. If theywant to kill you, you be dead. And you
find out that Adolf Hitler wants tomeet you because he somehow found
you attractive and he wants to havehe wants to be fucked by you. And so

(01:24:24):
you meet Adolf Hitler and you walkinto the door of his bedroom and what
do you see? Right? You're fuckingterrified. Oh, boy, I'm a Jew,
right? And I just walked intowhatever the White House of
Germany. I just walked into AdolfHitler's. This is outrageous. I
just walked into Adolf Hitler'sbedroom and he's posing with his ass

(01:24:45):
out and he has a thong on. What wouldyou fuck Hitler? It might do it. It
might win the war. You never know.And what? And so in exchange, I just
get to live or do I just rail him? You.Well, that no, no, OK, I'm putting
you in this like, you know, how likevideo games, like you start off like
this, like it fades and it's like,all right, you're in the zombie

(01:25:08):
apocalypse. You're just you are inAdolf Hitler's bedroom. He's
looking at you with his ass out andhis ass is hairy, right? This is the
forties. They didn't shave. He'slooking at you with his ass out and he
has on like a little black lace thongand he says, hey there, Gayo, what do
you do next? Oh, man, I don't know ifit's my life depended on it. I

(01:25:32):
probably would. I might have a hardtime getting it up because like
there's nothing about a man thatmakes me say, you know what, I want to
put my dick in that. The great point,by the way, great point. Yeah, if.
No. No, no, this is a good pointbecause you the soldiers because
the soldiers cannot know thesoldiers don't know that the reason
you're in there is to fuck Hitler,right? So the soldiers are not in on

(01:25:54):
it. You don't know either, right?You don't know. You just all you know
is you being led into this room,right? And it's Hitler and he
obviously wants to fuck, right? Soyou're terrified. Holy fucking
shit. I'm terrified. And now you'rethinking I need to get my dick up now,
right? And how are you going to dothat? Or do you just run? If it's by

(01:26:17):
run, I get killed. So if I if I know I'mgoing to get to live, I don't care if
the war ends, but I'm going to get tolive and not have to worry about
being killed because I'm a Jew. All Ihave to do is fuck them. You know, if
that's a condition, then I'll I'lljust have to have him suck me up to
suck me hard to be able to get inbecause I. I could sit there and

(01:26:41):
probably imagine something sexy.And maybe my imagination would be
better because, you know, only richpeople have TVs and all this other
stuff. So then my imagined nationwould have to be, you know, better
than what it is now. So I think Iprobably could get it up. It'd be a
tough time. I don't know if I couldget in. I don't know. It was a

(01:27:02):
condition that I get him offered. Igot a nut in him. Like, I don't know
what their rules are, but if I justgot to rail him. I don't know. You
don't know the rules, dude. Like Isaid, all you know is you just walked
it. You don't even know if you'regoing to live because think about it
like this. Think about it like this.If you're Hitler and you just got
railed by a Jew, wouldn't you wantto? Because if that Jew goes the next

(01:27:26):
day and tells everybody, you know,I'm saying, like, I think that. That
was part of the Nazi shit. It's likethey didn't like gay people. Like
you can't be gay, right? So and oh,Hitler's gay. So you know what I'm
saying? All of these angles. Andit's like, all right, you know what?
So hey, hey Hitler, I would bethinking like, what do I want to call

(01:27:46):
him to make him happy? Hey, NaziHitler, big daddy Hitler. Hey, you
want to come suck this tube? And nextthing you know, he's like, oh yeah,
I'd suck that Jewish cock. And nextthing you know, his little fucking
stash is rubbing your dick, right?How you feel about that? I don't

(01:28:09):
know, man. Like I've never had,that's a lot of hypothetical. The
only ones I really considered islike, if I ever do something where I
end up in prison, man, a mouth is amouth. Like I could probably get
behind a little twink and you know,have me a little fish bitch, but I
don't know if I could get behindrailing or getting railed by

(01:28:31):
anybody else. Like that's justoutside of prison. Yeah, I don't
think I could do it. I mean, unless Iwas guaranteed, hey, you're going
to live then, okay, fine, I'll find away to, but if I don't have that
guarantee, if I could just kill me,you know? Oh man, so, okay, so this is
a great distinct. We found out todaythat you, Gayo, if you were given the

(01:28:51):
ultimatum of some fucking gay sexwith Hitler or death, you'd choose
death. So you would tell, you wouldimmediately scream, so like,
Hitler's fucking gay, he wants me tofuck him, he's in a thong, help me.
Something, yeah, fuck it, you know?And then again, who knows, I'd
probably even try to kill him if Iknew that, hey, it might not end the

(01:29:14):
war. That's a great point. At least Iwould be able to avenge other Jews,
so I'd probably die trying to killhim or get to kill him and then get
killed either way. But yeah, that isa weird hypothetical, but yeah,
I'll have to go with death, yeah,because I just, you know, and even

(01:29:34):
with that gay sex in prison, I mean,we're talking like life in prison,
no parole, like I murdered familiesupon families and there's no death
sentence or death penalty in thatstate, then okay, fine, you know,
I'm here for life, I might as well getit in some way, but otherwise, yeah,
I just don't see myself, yeah, doingany gay sex. Yeah, I recently talked

(01:29:55):
to a guy, Wesley, who spent 10 yearsin jail, and that's what he told me
that surprised me. He said, man, thebiggest, most strong fucking
rocked up, just bodybuildingdudes, and not like dudes who are so
spoken, like the guys who would beatyour ass physically, because, I
mean, listen, their boxers,they're badass dudes, he's like,
those are the dudes, they were thebottoms, like they didn't even

(01:30:19):
wanna like just fuck someone, theylike, oh yeah, I'm going, get
fucked, but you can't talk about it,like you can't be like, oh, you
little twink, you little fuckingbitch, you bottom bitch, because
they beat your fucking ass, so yeah,it's not, I mean, it's not uncommon,
I don't know what I would do, I think,I think you bring up a really good
point with the Hitler shit, like,how about you fuck him either so good

(01:30:44):
that you fucking rupture, yourupture his intestines, or you,
maybe you fuck him like the best dickhe's ever gotten in his life, right?
And to where he's like, oh wow,you're a good little Jewish bitch,
like, oh my gosh, like I have to haveyou back, and then you're like, oh,
why don't we, I'm a little hungry,why don't we have like a nice

(01:31:06):
baguette cream cheese, and he'sfucking Hitler, right? So he's
like, yeah, I got, and then you getthe fucking butter knife, and you
say cream cheese this, bam, and youstab his ass with that butter knife,
and you save the world, this couldhave happened, we'd never know, you
could save the world, bro, neverknow. That's a way, I mean, like I

(01:31:26):
said, it just depends on thesituation, depends on what's going
on, how much I know, like, do I go gettransported there now, or did I grow
up in the 40s, so I mean, there's a lotof, but I think in general, unless
there's a way immediately that Icould try to kill him, other than, I
mean, I guess maybe with my barehands, I could probably try to chuck
him out, and snap his neck orwhatever. That's a good point.

(01:31:47):
Yeah, that's true. That's true too,because like I said previously,
nobody on this earth can know Hitleris gay, except Hitler. So his guards
don't know, so he can't have likesecurity guards in there, and
you're right, he's bending over,thinking he's about to take some
dick, you just grab his fuckingneck, and you just choke slam him and
kill him. That's a good idea too.Yeah, but at the same time, I kill

(01:32:09):
him, then how do I get out? Because Idon't know what password or code he
has, or tells the guards to letwhoever just railed him out. And
then again, maybe he just getsrailed, and then has the guards
killed him anyways. So it doesn'tmatter, whoever comes out that door
first is gonna get shot, so, youknow, who knows? But it might be

(01:32:30):
worth trying to kill him, who knows?That's a good fucking point, yeah,
maybe, yeah, maybe just try to killhim, or... Yeah, man. What if you're
like, all right, you know, Hitlersucked me off, his little mustache
was rubbing up on my dick, man, it'suncomfortable, but fuck it, you
know, I'm in fear for my life, so theblood's pumping anyway, so maybe my
dick's hard. And you know, and youstart fucking him, and you never

(01:32:55):
fucked a man, right? You don't evenknow if he has STDs or anything, man,
fuck. And you start fucking him, andnext thing you know, he starts
speaking in that Hitler voice thatyou see all the videos. Suck his
snuck, no it's not, it's not, no it'snot. He just starts going off, and
you lose it, you start, he's like, ohshit, your dick gets soft, holy

(01:33:16):
fuck. And next thing you know, hegets up and he tells you calmly, he's
like, no, I like it, keep going. Howdo you hold it together and continue
fucking him? To have him suck me offagain, or suck me off, I don't know.
Like there's, there's, it's justnot like, that's one of those you

(01:33:36):
need more time to process and thinkabout, but. Yeah, that's tough. Or
final answers, yeah, just try tokill him. Yeah, no, I didn't even
think of that one, to be honest withyou. This whole scenario just kind
of came to me while you were using thebathroom, am I weird? But yeah, man,
I didn't even think of that, yeah,just fucking kill him, because he

(01:33:56):
didn't look like a large man oranything like that, so yeah, just
fucking strangle him, especiallyif you're a Jew, right? This is the
number one enemy of your entirefucking people. This is the guy who
you fear the most, so yeah, youshould just fucking kill him in the
most brutal way possible, and youknow what, I'll die for that. Damn,

(01:34:17):
yeah, good answer, dude. Lastquestion, because I think, one
thing I respect about you, and wehaven't even talked about all the
crazy shit you've been through, wetalked about fucking Hitler
instead, you've gone through somelife experiences that I think are

(01:34:39):
very uncommon in my opinion, justall kind of crazy shit. What's your
best advice to young people? Bestadvice, I would say are the two
pieces I got from my parents, from mymother, I got, whether you're with
her for an hour, or the rest of yourlife, make her feel like she's the

(01:34:59):
only one, and if you do that, you'llget just about anything you want
from the woman you're with, whetherit's just that night or the rest of
your life. For my father, the bestpiece I got was, women are born with
the pussy, they don't want anotherone, and it's not just, I mean, he
meant it just with women, but fromthat, I was able to apply it to how I am

(01:35:24):
in general overall, and command andkeep respect from everyone, and not
have people try to overstep anyboundaries with me. I mean, joking
around here is one thing, butpersonal with work, with just
anybody out in the world, ifanything comes up, and some
stranger tries to make a joke andsay, oh, you look gay today with that

(01:35:48):
Hawaiian shirt you wear, whatever,I'll put a stop to it right there,
hey, I don't know you like that, youwanna step outside, I'll fuck you
up, but we're not gonna play this,oh, you're a fag, you little bitch
game, because I'll show you who's abitch, and it's not me. So it just
depends on how you wanna live yourlife and how you wanna be treated and
respected, because you can liveyour life in fear and in shame, or you

(01:36:10):
can choose to have self-respect foryourself and make others respect
you, and it's not like you make them,it's just that you command it by the
way you give respect, becausethere's not something, there's two
schools of thoughts of like, ohyeah, you should give respect to
everyone, and you need to earnrespect one way or another, but
either way, if you show yourself aperson of value, and I'm not talking

(01:36:30):
about high value males or whatever,just show that you have a value for
yourself, that you respectyourself, then others will tow the
line as well. Yo, that's fuckinggreat, that's fucking great
advice. I hear a lot of people sayinglike, oh, I don't give a shit, if you
don't respect me, then fuck you orwhatever, and this is, I think this
is a complete cop out for some bitchbullshit, because I would just

(01:36:54):
challenge everybody, it's like,oh, I don't care if you respect me,
everybody knows what it feels liketo be disrespected, right? In the
workplace, at school, we were allbullied, even if we were
disrespected by parents orwhatever, it doesn't feel good,
man, so if you cannot feel that, thenfuck yeah, carry yourself
accordingly. But yeah, dude, Iguess I always ask people, where can

(01:37:19):
people find you in all of this, butit's all gonna be in the show notes,
what are you up to next? I know youhave your podcast, it's excellent,
everybody should listen to it. Whatare you up to next? So right now, my
podcast, it's kind of like onhiatus, I'm depending on whether I
wanna change it or revamp it, soright now, Suisse is not my
favorite, it's basically just lifedating and sex advice, with a little

(01:37:41):
bit of a kink twist, but it's notsuper kinky, the kink twist is just,
kinksters in general, we alwayscommunicate with each other what we
want before we even have sex, so thatwe were all on the same page, we're
not having any surprises or tryingto figure out what they're into, if I
could put it in her butt or whatever,so that's the thing that I try to

(01:38:02):
push, is always be honest andcommunicative with your partner
and whoever you're dealing with,because if you do that, then there's
not gonna be any mistakes, there'snot gonna be problems later. And
other things that I'm doing, I'malso the co-host of Block Talk,
BLOKK Talk, I kinda do the samething, but I'm working with, I'm the

(01:38:22):
co-host and the creator, he's like a15 year younger version of me, so
it's like you get to see a 20 year old,he's about to turn 30, but you get to
see a 20 something version of me andyou get to see kind of like the calmer
version of me and kind of like givingadvice that way and same kind of
concept and ideas about dating andrelationships. And then right now

(01:38:42):
I'm editing and helping out with theJust Nate podcast, it doesn't have a
title yet, but he's Just Nate with a Kon TikTok, Instagram and all this
other stuff, he's a guy that goes outand helps homeless people and
whatever they ask for, he'll get itfor him, whether it's tents,
clothes, gas, whatever they need,he's gonna go out and buy it for him.
And he's got a big following andthere was a point in my life where I

(01:39:05):
was homeless, so it's kind of nearand dear to me, so I help out with that
however I can. And eventually atsome point I might redo my podcast or
just do one that's different justbased on my name, but you can find me
easily in all my socials atsucescias.xyz, you can find my
socials, you can text me, you cancall me, actually don't call me, I

(01:39:26):
don't know if I don't know yournumber, I'm not gonna answer, but
you can text or email me and find anyway to get a hold of me and talk to me
there. Awesome, I'm glad I asked,because I did not know about like all
the homeless podcasts and stufflike that. Gayo, thanks so much for
coming on, dude, I hope you have agreat day. You did the same,
appreciate it, thanks for having meon. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep.

(01:39:46):
Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep.

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#24 Gallo Chingon | Being a sex addict, a spouses death, mental health

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}#24 Gallo Chingon | Being a sex addict, a spouses death, mental health