Living in the Light of Christ: Ephesians 5

Episode Transcript
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Ti’heasha Beasley (00:00):
Foreign.

Pastor Brent McQuay (00:10):
Welcome to another episode of Between Sermons.
I'm your host, Brent McQuay, and I'm
the lead pastor at Disciples Church. And
what we're doing here is we are
continuing the conversation from Sunday and really
turning that monologue of a sermon into
a dialogue. Getting a little bit of
a back and forth, getting to dig
a little bit deeper. And we are
in a series now on the book

(00:32):
of Ephesians, hence my big fat study
Bible. And we're going to have some
fun today. And to help us do
that, Taisha, how you doing today?

I am well. I am so happy
to be back. I'm excited.

You took a week off.

What was that all about? I did.
I just a day of rest. Yep.
I needed some rest.

Oh, so you preached and then you
needed rest the next day.

Marcus Ivy (00:55):
Oh, yeah, I forgot about that.

Marcus, how do you feel about that?
That idea?

Marcus Ivy (01:00):
I'm here.

Oh, we show up.

You show. Oh, oh, okay. But I
did see last week's episode, and I
saw that you were teaching from your
phone. Yeah.

I got my study Bible at the
house, and I was like, well, I
got three more study Bibles in my
office. I'll just grab one of those.

Yeah.

And then I realized that none of
them were the ESV translation, and I
was like, for consistency, I'll just do
it from my phone.

You should have always be prepared.

Marcus Ivy (01:26):
We're supposed to bring the word.

No. I gave her a hard time.
Like, in the first week or second
week, it was like I had my
big study Bible. Was it David?

It was David.

Her husband had his big study Bible.
And we're like. And I came nerding
out about the Bibles, like, because we
had the same study Bible, just different
wrapping on it.

Marcus Ivy (01:42):
Gotcha. Okay.

And then we look over at Taisha,
and can somebody give me my phone?

I'm building some strong muscles in this
podcast.

Thick skin.

Thick skin. Not strong muscles.

Not strong muscles.

Marcus Ivy (01:55):
Thick skin, thick skin.

Thick skin.

Strong muscles, though, to throw fists. Like,
you try to fight.

Someone's ready for battle. She ready to
fight hands, man. But I love being
on the podcast, so it's a joy
to be back with my family. And
we have today's special guest, Marcus Ivy.
How you feel sitting in the seat
right now? I know you had to
teach two lessons yesterday, and now you're

(02:21):
here. How do you feel?

Marcus Ivy (02:23):
Yeah, I feel like this is a
real hot seat.

This is. This is right.

Marcus Ivy (02:27):
Yeah. Sunday probably was no. No comparison
to this, so.

Absolutely.

Marcus Ivy (02:32):
Yeah. I'm ready, though. Let's go.

Yes. Because People don't know. Just an
FYI, when I listen to the message,
I listen to it twice. The first
time of quest to receive and the
second time to like, tear it apart
a little bit and be like, oh,
I'm gonna ex this. I'm an ex
that.

Marcus Ivy (02:47):
So about to tear me up.

No, I'm gonna be easy on you.
I'm gonna be easy today. But I'm
excited. How's Ephesians going for you guys?
How do you feel about it? We're
on week five.

Marcus Ivy (02:57):
Yeah, I think it's been. It's been
good because it's just been, you know,
just life application. Yeah. It's not a
lot of, you know, mysteries and things.
It's like, here it is. This is
what it is. And just in our
groups, just, you know, just hearing the
people really talk about it and to
be excited about it and to hear
other people, you know, how they understand

(03:18):
the word, I mean, it's just been
real good. We're in Pastor Jason Park's
group.

Okay.

Marcus Ivy (03:24):
So, yeah, it's been good.

So before we move on to your
intake, I know that you said on
stage that you were not going to
share with us from last week, Chapter
four.

Marcus Ivy (03:36):
Oh, yeah.

What your. But, you know, that was
the first thing I was like, oh,
we're going to find that out tomorrow.

Marcus Ivy (03:43):
I think it was paired of. Was
it six. The one with the talking.
Well, let's see which one it was.
Which one was that? I think it
was six.

No corrupt talk.

Marcus Ivy (03:55):
Yeah, the no corrupt talk.

12:12 from verse 29. Let no corrupting
talk come out of your mouth. And
that. That actually is present in in
ver. In chapter five.

Marcus Ivy (04:04):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So you got double slap.

Marcus Ivy (04:06):
Yeah, I got double whammy. Yeah. So.
So in short, I. You were looking
to close on a house.

Yeah.

Marcus Ivy (04:12):
And. And it, you know, it's. It's.
It's crazy how much information they want
want. And it's like you just send
them information and they're requesting it again.
And so, you know, we just had
a good time in church. We listen
to the word and so I go
to my emails, get the email, they
requesting something I had just sent them
the night before. And so, you know,
I, you know, I was starting to

(04:33):
say some corrupting words possibly.

I need an example.

And I'm just like, you didn't start
with per my last email.

Marcus Ivy (04:41):
Yeah, almost like, like, yeah, check this
out. But. And so like, in the
midst of that, Crystal and I, we.
My wife, we just kind of was
laughing like, man, we got challenged already.
It was like, man. So, yeah, it
was very convicting and challenging, but to
have that and to not continue in
it, you know, So I was checked
right away, so I was able to
cut it off and then like, all

(05:03):
right, let's get what they want. You
know, probably last Sunday, it probably would
have been. The conversation would have carried
on a little bit more, but. Yeah.
So thank you, Pastor Brent.

Hey, thank Paul. He wrote it. Thank
the Holy Spirit. He inspired it.

Marcus Ivy (05:17):
Yeah.

But is that something that you struggle
with? Because. Is it fair to say,
because you had that moment that this
is something that you deal with?

Marcus Ivy (05:25):
No, it was just like, boom. And
it came up. It was like, yeah.
So it was like a lot of
pressure, you know, dealing with buying a
house and stuff. And it was just
like every day, almost every other day,
there was something, and it was just,
like, bubbling up.

I guess, the season. Okay.

That's the fun thing about all those
imperatives is they apply to all of
us.

Yeah.

Marcus Ivy (05:47):
Yeah.

You know, and, yeah, you might have
one that you're, like, struggling with, but
that doesn't mean that the other one's
not going to creep its ugly head
and be like, hey, you forget about
me?

Marcus Ivy (05:55):
Because when you were going over the
list, that was one that I definitely
didn't even.

Yeah, you're like, that's.

Marcus Ivy (06:00):
That's not me. Yeah. And then Holy
Spirit, like, oh, yeah, it is you
today, buddy.

Yeah.

Marcus Ivy (06:05):
Right?

Yes. What about you, Pastor Brent? What
have you been enjoying the most? I
know you like this side of Ephesians
because it's talking about what we're supposed
to do as believers.

I think just the. The whole study
itself has been. Has been great because
this has always been one of my
favorite books of the Bible. I. I
probably could call it my favorite book
of the Bible. I just have to
be hesitant because, you know, every time
I do a deep dive into something,
it becomes my new favorite.

Marcus Ivy (06:32):
Right.

But I've loved Ephesians for a really
long time because it is just. It
is so beautifully written. The structure, the
language, the poetry of it, the. The
breakdown of three chapters just forming this
foundation for what we believe and why
we believe it, and then that foundation
becoming the. The source or the fuel

(06:53):
for our behavior, that it's. You don't
just do these things. Right. I think
you even talked about it in your
message. Like, you don't do these things
so you can be a saint. Because
you're a saint. You do these things.
So it's because of chapters one, two,
and three now I'm going to do
chapters four and six. And so I've
always loved that. Now getting to see

(07:13):
other people, it's almost like every conversation
I have, it's like little light bulbs
are just going off and they're like,
man, this chapter, this book is so
amazing.

I'm like, I know.

So it's just. It's just cool to
see people kind of go on that
journey.

Yeah. Were you intentional with the elite
team to plan out this book because
of the name change of Disciples Church?
Because.

Not at all.

Okay.

We actually, we planned out Ephesians before.
We actually planned out the name change
because we, I mean, we had already
started to dabble into the name change,
but it was like, man, we were,
what, a couple of months in, maybe
a few weeks in.

Yeah.

To that conversation. And so now, honestly,
we chose it first and foremost because
I love it, but second, because it's.
It's six chapters and we wanted a
six week series. Literally, like, that's about
as deep as it goes.

Wow.

Marcus Ivy (08:06):
I was talking to Crystal yesterday too,
was like, you know, although we're doing
a six week series on this, it
actually could be like a six month.

Oh, man.

Marcus Ivy (08:13):
Because there's so much.

It is.

I mean, how many, how many verses
have we just totally glossed over?

Marcus Ivy (08:18):
Yeah, just kind of glossed over.

Like, I think mine last week. Like,
I didn't say anything about ascending and
descending. And like, Paul goes on this
whole rant and I'm just like, all
right, moving on. Right. You know, you
skip out on everybody's. Everybody's like, talk
about the husbands and wives.

Marcus Ivy (08:31):
And you're like, no, we ain't doing
that.

The good part, the juicy part is
that.

And then, I mean, I. Last week
I had a 15 point sermon.

Marcus Ivy (08:40):
Right.

Like, which, which that's, that's not. That's
way too much information.

Marcus Ivy (08:45):
Like, I didn't count the imperatives in
chapter five, but I think it was
a lot. And so I was like,
no, I'm not going. Let's just kind
of mold this together and give it.

What's funny about the imperative things is
there's tons of different lists.

Marcus Ivy (08:59):
Yeah.

Because, like, the way the Greek language
works, there's some things that in English
it appears as an imperative, but in
the original Greek it wasn't. There's some
things that are like, is this one
imperative or is this four imperatives off
of one sentence? And so, like, the
numbering is all over the place, but,
like, the general consensus is the average.
I guess I would say is there's
40 in the book of Ephesians.

Wow.

One in chapters one, two, and three,
15 in chapter four, and I think
that makes it 14 in chapter five.

Marcus Ivy (09:30):
Yeah.

But, like, I've also seen people that
have a list of, like, 20 in
chapter five. So it really. It just
depends on how you categorize them.

Marcus Ivy (09:39):
Right.

You know, it's like if. If he's
telling you to do this thing and
this thing is that one or two.

Marcus Ivy (09:45):
Right. Yeah.

That y'all are already nerding out. We
didn't even get to that part of
the show because I'm like, what? No,
I'm just playing.

That's. That's why I did appreciate. I
did enjoy the way you broke down,
creating almost categories. Yeah. And. And your
original message. You had a fourth category.

Marcus Ivy (10:06):
Yeah.

And I told you to cut it.
Like, I was like, you ain't got.

Marcus Ivy (10:08):
Time for that one.

You are. You are to be way
over.

Yeah.

Wasn't that prophetic?

Marcus Ivy (10:16):
I would imagine so.

Was it?

Never. Are you trying to affirm your
prophetic gift on the show?

Marcus Ivy (10:23):
Maybe you should come back.

That was not prophetic. That was experience.
That was.

No, I think a lot of things
you do, Pastor Brent, is prophetic. Whether
you want to like choosing Ephesians as
we enter discipleship church so the Holy
Spirit be speaking.

I don't think that that would categorize
as prophetic. That's. That's just sometimes God
is doing things and you don't know
what he's doing and why. Like Ephesians.
I love Ephesians.

Yeah.

It's six weeks. Let's do Ephesians.

Yeah.

And God's like, yeah, I need you
to do Ephesians.

Marcus Ivy (10:53):
Right.

I'm so sad that I missed out
on the conversation about prophetic, because we
can't go backwards. But that's a place
I love to. To talk about. But
anyway, we're not going to dwell there.

It's a new day, Tyisha.

It's a new day.

We're on chapter five.

We're on chapter five. I will stay
the course. So before we dive into
conversation, Marcus, can you kind of take
us on a journey of chapter four
for those who did not catch, you
know, the message, and I do advise
you to go if you can, and
re. Watch the sermon from yesterday. It
was an amazing message. But just a
really quick recap of what this passage

(11:29):
was about before we dive into husband
and wives.

Marcus Ivy (11:32):
Oh, we did. We dived into that.

Oh, we gonna dive.

Marcus Ivy (11:35):
So.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Marcus Ivy (11:37):
It's. Paul is amazing how Brent said
That, you know, he's poetic in how
he does things. And so verses one
and two were very poetic. It was
very. Let's set the scene for what
I'm about to present to you. And
as I was kind of studying, I
was like this kind of slick because,

(11:58):
you know, the hard stuff, the hard
part, it really starts in chapter, in
verse three. So it's like, you know,
therefore be imitators, you know, be children.
And you know, this sweet smelling aroma,
all these wonderful words. And then he
says, but sexual immorality, impure things, you
know, he lists off, says this list

(12:18):
of these things that we need to
start, you know, talking about. And so
it's like, hey, you know, you know,
I love the way he does it.
He's almost like, you know, like an
uncle or a grandfather. Hey, do this,
don't do that, do that, you know,
and, and just following, just kind of
in, in Ephesians 5, it flowed. So,
so awesome how he does it. I
mean, it's Paul as God's inspired word,

(12:39):
but it made it real kind of
easy to apply. Right. You know, if,
if you're open to that, you know,
we can list all these things out
and then don't do anything about them
and just read it and it's just
another good book.

Yeah.

Marcus Ivy (12:52):
But I think, you know, even just
being in Ephesians, just kind of walking
through Ephesians, it really makes you. Ephesians
is a maturing book.

It is.

Marcus Ivy (13:01):
It makes you mature.

Yes.

Marcus Ivy (13:04):
If you really want to mature. So
it's there. And so, you know, just
kind of going through this, walking through
love and you know, some of the
things, even as I was going through
it, like the sections, the first section,
walk through love one through seven, it's
like, well, how does this equate, you
know, walking in love? Well, you have
to walk in love to overcome these
type of things. You know, walking in

(13:24):
this light, you know, we have to
understand that it's not our light and
it's his light. And you know, just
walking in wisdom, one of the verses
said, you know, we can't keep doing
these foolish things, right? Because the time
is evil. Like the days are evil.
So why, you know, as a maturing
believer, as a maturing saint, we can't
continue doing those things. And, you know,

(13:46):
it checked me. I look at my
life and just kind of like how
God matured me and it's like, man,
I wish I could have matured faster
in this. But it was all obviously
according to his plan, but kind of
revisiting this and just kind of going
through Ephesians. It's like this opportunity for
everyone to mature. So. And then. Yeah,
so just leaving off with the walk

(14:07):
in wisdom and just coming up into
the marriage part, I wanted to go
into that. You know, I've been married
for 21 years, but it's a lot
of truths and awesomeness in that section
as well. So.

Yeah, yeah, you say, I've been married
for 21 years. I have experience to
match with this past.

Marcus Ivy (14:27):
Yes.

I love it. Well, thank you for
that quick, you know, summary of that
book. So just thinking about some things
you were talking about in your lesson.
I like how you use the flashlight
example, shining the light. And so how
when you're putting together this passage, how

(14:50):
do you get these illustrations? Like, how
did that come to mind when you
were reading that passage? Because you had
a lot of different. You were jumping.
It went from, like, sexual immorality. Immorality
to walking in love. That type of
stuff stressed me out when it's like
all these different themes in one passage.
So how did you get to the
place where you were able to illustrate

(15:11):
all of those things?

Marcus Ivy (15:12):
I love using illustrations. I think it
makes the word comes to life and
especially for a heavy message like this.
So it's really just all God downloading,
you know, I'll prepare a message and
then it's just like, oh, yeah, you
were training. So the light. And then
you start doing this. And this is
how you was doing this. So, oh,
yeah, let's use that. Even with just

(15:34):
the table, the conversation about the table
at my job, you know, just making
sure we put up barriers because I
would really do that before I left
my office, before I got my key
code, because I think somebody else in
the office had. And the building had
a key. And I knew something was
missing in my thing. So, you know,
just kind of, kind of, you know,
how can we make this more appliable

(15:56):
where people of all generations can, you
know, can catch it? And actually, one
of my friends texted me last night
and was like, my son and I
were talking about this message all the
way home. And he really, you know,
you really resonated with him on that,
the table exercise. He was like, you
know, we have to be careful, you
know, what we put up and how

(16:16):
we do things. And so just to
hear that, that I was able to
reach generations in that. It was cool.

So people watching probably like, what is
the table? What was that referring to?

Marcus Ivy (16:29):
Yeah, when I worked at my office,
I had a table in my. A
desk in my Office. And I would
make sure, you know, it was kind
of. Probably. Probably. I guess now. Yeah.

I was thinking that when he was
preaching, I'm like, my man, this is
paranoid.

Marcus Ivy (16:43):
Yeah, but what's they call OCD or
whatever, one of those terms. But it
was just like I would put a
pin, like on a telephone cord. Cause
I knew somebody was coming to my
office. Like, I knew it. And so
anyway, yeah, it was just a strategic
thing to do. So when I came
in the next day, I can look
and say, okay. And I think just

(17:04):
what we have to really do in
our spiritual life, we have to put
things in order so that we'll know.
Okay, you know what? I'm out of
order here. You know, this is out
of place because we can get into
a place where we start doing things
routinely and they become normal. They become
back in place, even as a believer.

Yeah, that's good.

Yeah. And the passage says that these
things should be out of place among
you.

Marcus Ivy (17:30):
Yes.

And so it's this idea that, like,
when you would come in and you'd
see your desk, you knew immediately something
wasn't right. We should have the like.
When you're reading through, you know, let
there be no filthiness or foolish talk,
nor crude joking. These are out of
place among you. So when you hear
a Christian using crude humor and filthiness

(17:53):
and foolish talk, there should be something
that goes that's out of place, that's
not right.

Marcus Ivy (17:58):
Yeah.

And so I love the example because
it's. It's a real world, I guess,
illustration of what we should be experiencing
spiritually.

Marcus Ivy (18:08):
Yeah. Because we can easily get caught
in those conversations. Right? Yeah. A lot
of times you hear those jokings and
you know, yeah, I'm Christian, but then
you come participate and listen. Yeah, see,
And I didn't even use that. Did
you notice that? Did you notice?

Water cooler.

Marcus Ivy (18:22):
Yeah, I didn't even use the water
cooler.

The illustrations you use of, like, being
a part of the gossip at the
barbershop shop or being a part of
the gossip at the.

Marcus Ivy (18:31):
No, not at the water cooler.

Not at the water cooler. It's the
inside thing. But I was. I was
happy to hear that. It was something
you. Something that came out in this
passage. And I would love to. This
is a moment for you guys to
nerd out on. There's a term in
this scripture that Paul uses when he
addresses us as saints. A lot of

(18:53):
times, especially the re. We love our
reformed community, but a lot of times
we always identify ourselves as sinners saved
by grace and So I remember having
this conversation with David. Maybe it was
a long time ago, and it was
before I had Nehemiah, so that's how

(19:14):
long ago it was. And he kept
saying, like, we're sinners saved by grace.
I'm like, you know, I'm tired of
hearing that. And he was like, why?
I was like, because I'm a saint
now. Now that I'm a believer, I'm
a saint. And so how do you
help people? Because I feel like when
we stay in this center, saved by
grace mentality, I feel like that just
opens up so many. Like, I'm always

(19:38):
gonna mess up. I'm always gonna, you
know, fall and fall short of the
glory. So this being called a saint,
I feel like was intentional by Paul
to kind of, like, switch our mindsets,
like you said, to build those barriers,
to walk in love. So what are.
What are your input on that? Is.
Is it wrong to say we're sinners

(19:58):
saved by grace, or should we just
address ourselves as saints?

Both do both. Both. Both statements can
be true at the same time. You
are a sinner, and you are a
saint, and we get that from Paul.
So, like, Paul refers to everybody as
saints, but then he also says, I'm
the chief of sinners.

Yeah.

So, like, there's an. There's an understanding,
there's an identity of, I am a
sinner saved by grace, but I'm also
a saint. And so, like, you also
look at when Paul says, you know,
should we keep on sinning so the
grace may abound.

Marcus Ivy (20:30):
Certainly.

Certainly not. Like, that's. That's a stupid
thing to ask. Like, so when somebody
takes the message of I'm a sinner
saved by grace and uses that as
permission to continue in sin. Wrong. When
somebody takes the I'm a saint, which
means I no longer sin. Well, James
also said, for anyone that says, I
have not, I have no sin, he's

(20:52):
a liar. Right. So, like him, yeah.
The truth is not in it. So,
like, you have to take the totality
of Scripture and that. That's what is
awesome about doing a deep dive into
one book of the Bible. But also,
you know, you have to take things
within the structure of Scripture. And so
both statements are true statements. Both statements

(21:12):
also include dangers if you take it
to an extreme in one direction or
an extreme in the other. So are
you a sinner saved by grace? Yes.
Are you a saint? Yes.

I guess that clears up. Mic drop.
Okay, so I'll identify as a saint
and say that I have issues and
I always need Grace. Yeah. So that's
a good place.

It keeps you in a place of
humility, which is huge in scripture. It's
huge in God's eyes. Yes. I mean,
it's. It's the. We're going to jump
all over the place now. It's the
huge difference between David and Saul. Like,
both of them sin. And you could
easily argue that David's sin was way
worse than Saul's sin. But Saul had

(21:58):
pride and arrogance in his sin. David
had humility.

Marcus Ivy (22:02):
Yes.

In his sin. So, like, there is
something about being a sinner saved by
grace that. That reminds us of our
humanity, of our need for a Savior,
of the grace of God in our
lives. It keeps us from becoming puffed
up. Where some people that take that
I'm a saint thing, it puffs up.

Marcus Ivy (22:21):
Made it.

Yeah, man.

It's man. Stay humble.

Yeah.

Recognize where you are, but also live
as a saint. Right. So, like, recognize
you were a sinner.

Yeah.

Saved by grace.

Marcus Ivy (22:32):
Yeah.

Yeah.

Marcus Ivy (22:32):
I think that's good. It's a call
to remembrance and not a remembrance to
go back to.

Right.

Marcus Ivy (22:38):
But a remembrance to keep going forward.
So I think. Yeah, that's. That's an
awesome way how you put that.

So who was Paul, and maybe we
talked about this in previous podcast episodes,
but who was Paul writing to? I
guess, for me, I want. That's really
important to understand some of the things
he was addressing, because we know it's
relevant to us now in 2025. But
what was the church? Why did he
feel like he had to address these

(23:03):
imperatives?

So here, here's the fun thing about
Ephesians. It's one of, I think only
two of his letters, maybe three, that
isn't written to address an issue. So
it isn't that he's gotten word of
man. There's some idolatry happening. There's some
fornication happening. This is one of the
reasons why I do love Ephesians, because

(23:25):
it's such a blanket statement of the
faith. And so he's writing to. Primarily
his audience is gentile believers. Right. So
it's not a Jewish audience, although there
is Jewish influence. That's why he addresses
the Jew and Gentile thing so much.
So that's affecting the area because it's
a. Ephesus was a trade city, so

(23:46):
it's a port city. And so there's
probably a lot of Jewish people there.
But from what we gather from the
Scriptures, it was primarily gentile converts to
Christianity. And so he's writing to them.
And in the context of where they
are. There's great wealth. There's a lot
of spiritual oppression in the sense of.

(24:06):
There's these hierarchy of deities in Ephesus.
They're a very spiritual place. They wanted
the occult, they wanted the power, dark
magic, all kinds of stuff. So. So
they're in this context of hyper spirituality,
great wealth and a diversity of people.

Marcus Ivy (24:23):
Sounds like somewhere we live, I was
gonna say.

And that's part of what makes Ephesians
such a great book, is that there
are so many parallels like this. This
was like a great city or demonstration
of America. Yeah. And so. Yeah. And
so we can find a lot of
parallels in the people and what they're
going through. But that's why, like, chapter
six, we're going to get into a

(24:46):
lot of the. The spiritual warfare stuff
with the armor of God. But it's
sprinkled all throughout is this. This whole
deity system they had. And it was
about a tiered system. That's why you
hear a lot in Ephesians where Paul
talk about the name that is above
every other name. And it's. It's basically,
it's saying, hey, I know that you
think this God is better than that
God is better than that God is

(25:07):
better than that God, but guess what?
There's someone above every name on that
list.

Yeah.

And so there's. Yeah, it's a very
interesting book in that it wasn't written
because of a specific sin issue that
he's trying to address. So he's. He's
really just equipping them for the spiritual
battle that they're in.

Yeah.

And so that spiritual battle, they need
to be walking in a manner worthy
of the calling. They need to be
imitators of God, that they need to
be walking out these things as a
demonstration. They need to be walking in
light because there's a lot of darkness
around them. And so they need to
be doing these things. But they're doing
these things because chapter one, two, and
three is all about God's love and
his grace. And so. Yeah, it's kind

(25:46):
of cool.

Yeah.

Marcus Ivy (25:48):
And, you know, I think that's why
this book kind of maybe is relating
to so many people now, especially in
our study, that we're breaking it down
verse by verse, because it is now,
like these things are going on now.
It's not something where it's like this
Old Testament field that you can't relate
to these things. I think people at

(26:10):
D.C. and across the street are going
through right now 20, 25. And so
I think that's why People have a
hunger for it. And I think that's
why people are really involved in their
groups. You know, there's no quiet time
in groups. I think really, people need.
Needed this right now. You know, not

(26:30):
to be biblically a nerd, but for
such a time as this.

I was just gonna say it's like.

Marcus Ivy (26:35):
Really, really needed now. And it just.
It doesn't even matter what. How old
you are. You know, if you're able
to understand, you can see these things
clearly right before our eyes right now.

And back to something you said earlier,
like the. I wish it was strategy
on our part. Clearly, it's strategy on
the Holy Spirit's part. But as we,
you know, rebranded the church, renamed the
church, as we got everybody hyped and
excited about being disciples, and. And then
the question is, well, what does that
look like? If, like, because it's so

(27:10):
much of it is. Is about that
walk. Yeah, right. Because discipleship, it's a
process. It's a journey. Right. Christianity sometimes
just becomes a prayer. You pray, but
discipleship is a path that you walk.
And so much of Ephesians, Paul is
laying out what that walk looks like
and what that walk does not look

(27:31):
like. So, like, make sure you're doing
the things you're supposed to be doing
and stop doing the things you're not
supposed to be doing.

Yeah, man. Even just thinking about just
the encouragement that this chapter brings, even
beyond the pages. So, like, understanding the
background, understanding where Paul was when he
wrote it, like, all of that is
an encouragement to our faith. Like, could
you imagine being imprisoned and you're still
encouraging the body to, like, live this

(27:58):
life? Like, how many of us, Pastor
Brand Marcus, could, if you were confined
or you had something going on in
your life, so heavy, and which you
probably do, that I do not know
about. But you said still took the
assignment to encourage the church. Like, I
feel like that's kind of like what's
happening with this book of Ephesians. Just
seeing his lifestyle, Paul's lifestyle and being

(28:20):
like, man, it's needed. Like, this is
needed.

Marcus Ivy (28:24):
Paul is very intentional about not focusing.

On himself, on his self. Yes.

Marcus Ivy (28:29):
That's what I'm trying to get to.
I think that's one of the awesome
things about that. And I think that's
just another lesson that we can learn.
I don't know if it's an imperative
in there, but we need to stop.
Actually, it was. It was in chapter
five that we need to be kind
to one another, tenderhearted. We need to
be paying more attention to Other people.
Because this world does offer the opportunity
for us to get self pitied and

(28:51):
self exposed, you know, just kind of
closed off to me and mine and
no one else's, so. But that's not
the walk of a disciple, man.

So. Good. All right, well, let's transition
into this little section on HUDs.

We can't yet. We can't yet.

Okay. Less. Less. Yes, go ahead, host.

So my favorite ver. Like my life
verse, the. The thing that has shaped
who I am and I go back
to on a daily basis is Ephesians
5, 15 and 16. And I have
it memorized in the NIV, not the
ESV. But I'm going to go ahead

(29:30):
and say it how I got it,
because I. I have such a hard
time saying it any other way. But
be very careful then how you live.
Not as unwise, but as wise. Making
the most of every opportunity. Because the
days are evil.

Marcus Ivy (29:45):
Yes.

And that's good if you can wake
up every day with that mentality of,
I'm going to be very careful how
I live today. Right. It's not about
how I'm going to live 10 years
from now. No. Today I'm going to
be very careful. I live because if
I'm not careful, I can. I can
fall into a lot of stupid stuff.

Marcus Ivy (30:02):
Yeah.

If I'm not careful, if not thinking
about what I'm doing and I'm not
planning out how I'm walking this walk,
I'm gonna. I'm gonna be that. That
woman that's staring at her phone, walking
into the hole in front of her.
Right. And so I'm gonna be very
careful how I live. Not as unwise,
but as wise. There is a wise
way of living. There's an unwise way
of living. This demonstrates for you what

(30:23):
wisdom looks. So you take the rest
of Ephesians and you just say, okay,
where's the wisdom? You know, in the
way I'm living. It is unwise for
me to be fornicating. It's unwise for
me to be lying and cheating and
stealing and having a crude language. So
I'm gonna walk in wisdom, not in

(30:44):
as unwise. And I'm going to make
the most. And this is the one
that just. It hit me like I
loved every part leading up to it.
But it was make the most of
every opportunity. That as a disciple, I
want to be reminded that every day
God has given me an opportunity for
something, to encourage somebody, to share the
gospel with somebody, to coach somebody, to

(31:06):
correct somebody every day, to demonstrate the
love of God to somebody that's never
experienced it before, but every single day.
And this is kind of my personal
belief of scripture, but that is that
every day has purpose and meaning, that
every day has opportunity. Right. Like the
opportunity didn't come for you just to
preach on Sunday, right? Yeah, that's an

(31:28):
opportunity. But you had opportunity on Saturday.
You got opportunity today, you're gonna have
opportunity next Sunday, even though you're not
gonna be on stage. Right. And so
I think every. Every single disciple needs
to be looking at their day going,
okay, God, where's the. Where's the Holy
Spirit opportunity here? And the opportunity may
be while you're at the grocery store,
the opportunity maybe while you're walking the
dog. The opportunity may be when you're

(31:49):
at the restaurant and the server looks
like they're having a hard day. But
there is an opportunity every single day
for you to demonstrate your faith. So
what are you gonna do with it?

Marcus Ivy (31:59):
That's why, you know, and when I
say walk in wisdom, you have to
be intentional about that. You know, just
like the lady looking at her phone
and not even realizing this big gaping
hole in front of her and walks
directly into the hole. And then using
the example of a baby, you know,
there's things that maturity allows to do,
and sometimes you have to make sure

(32:21):
that you're not doing unwise things. But
how. Sometimes you gotta be stable like
a little baby before you take that
step. Wait, let me see what's going
on first. Let me see what's going
on. Like you said, start the day
off with being just kind of getting
stable, you know, in your word and
stuff like that. Before you go, take
steps. A lot of times we will
wake up and just haphazardly just open

(32:41):
and start the day without one starting
seeking God, without having no type of
devotion. And then. So we're just walking
around here foolishly. Yeah, foolishly. You know,
unwise. I mean, we get our wisdom
from the word. And so to start
your day off like that, with that
scripture, we have to get a spiritual
base, I guess, you know that I'm

(33:02):
kind of saying. And that's wisdom. Yeah,
that's wisdom.

I love that analogy that you used,
too, of the walking like a baby.
Like, there's something about when you first
put your faith in. In. In Christ.
Like you are a baby. Yeah, spiritually,
and. And babies are gonna fall a
lot more than somebody that's mature. However,
at the same time, I'm 40. I
can still trip and fall down the
stairs.

Like, if not, you're not paying attention.

Not paying attention. Like the other day,
like, my feet were tired. They weren't
coming up as high as I thought
they were coming up, and I just
tripped over nothing.

I wish I could have saw nothing.
I do.

What a jerk.

I do.

Where's the love?

This.

I wish I was there with a
camera.

I would have recorded it. But it's.

Marcus Ivy (33:45):
That would have got some likes.

It would have got some likes.

We'll reenact it somewhere.

Okay?

No, but I think that there's. There's
an understanding that, hey, as you mature,
you can still trip and fall. Like,
you can still be struggling with your
walk. However, if you're 40 and you're
still walking like you're 2, there's. There's
probably a problem there. Right? There's probably
an issue. So in that spiritual journey,
we should be maturing, we should be

(34:12):
growing. But don't kill yourself over, you
know, the trip that you had yesterday.

Marcus Ivy (34:16):
Right, the trips, yeah. I think that's
why I brought up about maturity. You
know, we, you know, some people can
be 30 years within this Christian walk
and still be immature or just as
immature as a new believer. And you
know that tripping, you know that tripping
doesn't even faze them anymore because it's
just natural.

I'm just clumsy.

Marcus Ivy (34:35):
Yeah, I'm just an old, clumsy saint.
Just keep tripping and stuff like that.
And so. Yeah. So, you know, I
think we definitely have to be mindful
of how we're walking this thing out,
because this walk is not, you know,
it's not for us. You know, the
light, you know, when I was talking
about the path, we should be producing
fruit and that those things, the goodness,
the truth and stuff, it should be

(34:56):
lighting up the path for other believers,
other non believers and believers alike, you
know, and it's because it's not our
light anyway. Yeah, it's not our light
anymore.

I said it before. You can get
old in Christ without getting maturing it
out.

Marcus Ivy (35:08):
Yeah. Miles, what do we got?

Oh, we talk about. It's not the.
It's not the years, it's the Miles.

Marcus Ivy (35:13):
It's the Miles.

That's good. It reminds me of a
conversation. And thank you for bringing this
up, because I would have totally went
to wives and husbands and we would
have missed.

Everybody's mad at me right now. Like,
we've been waiting for the wives and
husbands.

Cut it off again. Cut it off
again.

We're out of time. Sorry, guys. We'll
see.

No, see you next week. No, it
reminded me of A conversation I had
with a friend this weekend, and she
was like, have you seen this episode
of this. You know, she was just
name out all these recent shows I
used to indulge in with her. I
was like, no, friend, I haven't seen
those. She was like, I need you
to come from behind the Bible. She

(35:52):
literally said this to me, I need
you to come from behind the Bible
and get with. Get with your culture.
And I was like. I went home
and I was like, God, am I
too. Like, I don't want to be
too safe.

Marcus Ivy (36:03):
Can I watch Hot Wives of Atlanta?

Right.

Marcus Ivy (36:06):
Housewives.

It's a whole new scene, whole new
season. But I really feel like the
more you mature.

Marcus Ivy (36:12):
Yeah.

The more you're just drawn to, like,
His Word and the agenda of God's
kingdom. And not to say that anyone
who indulge in those things are not.
But, like, I am just in a
space right now where it's like, man,
this is my life. I live it,
like. And I enjoy studying His Word

(36:33):
and. Because I know we are living
in the. In a day and age
where if you're not careful, it just
takes that one opportunity and you're back
in the streets. But it's like, it's
so important to just as. As we
mature, to just continue to understand, like,

(36:53):
things will fall off and it's okay.

But that. That conviction that you're feeling,
it's. I mean, it's verse three and
four. But sexual immorality and all impurity
or covetousness must not even be named
among you as is proper among saints.
Let there be no filthiness, nor foolish
talk, nor crude joking, which are out
of place. Okay, so what, you're recognizing

(37:19):
that there's some stuff that are just
out of place. Right. There's some stuff
that is being named among Christians that
shouldn't be named among Christians. And I
think what, what, what becomes dangerous. And
this is. Man, I heard this, this
quote when I was a teenager, and
it wrecked me. This preacher said, why
be entertained by something that Christ died

(37:40):
to save you from? And it's this
idea that there are some people out
there that would be like, I would
never have an affair. I would never
fornicate. But your favorite TV show is
all about an affair.

Wow.

The entire premise of the show is
about an affair, and you're just caught
up in the drama of it. Yeah.
But you're being entertained by a sin
that you're like, oh, well, I would
never commit that sin.

Marcus Ivy (38:06):
Yeah.

But that sin is entertaining.

Well, I hope you really love us
because we are stepping on toes, including
mine sometimes.

Marcus Ivy (38:18):
We're checking all saved favorites on your.
On directv.

Go through your ch. That going to
be a new requirement for membership. We
got to go through your watch history.

So what about those? I mean, that
just opened up a whole another conversation.
Do we allow the Holy Spirit to
convict us in those areas or. Okay,
cuz then we don't want to tell
people like, you cannot watch Atlanta Housewives
or you cannot watch whatever shows you.
Cuz you like crime and thriller movies.
Pastor, how I threw you under the

(38:52):
bus.

I love good mystery.

So.

But yeah, no, and. And that is
where Holy Spirit conviction comes to play.

Yeah.

Now we have to be careful because
I think it was in chapter four
we talked about. Oh man, what was
it? How the Gentiles. When you, when
you walk, as the Gentiles walk, you
become callous. And I think that some
people put so much faith and trust
in. Well, the Holy Spirit would tell

(39:23):
me when I'm wrong. Yeah, maybe he
has been. He's been telling you it's
wrong, but you're callous to his voice
and so you're not feeling it and
you're not hearing it, even though he's
saying it. And so sometimes, yes, we
need the Holy Spirit always, but sometimes
you also need a fellow believer to

(39:43):
come alongside and be like, you know,
I don't know if you prayed about
that one or not, but maybe you
should. And there's absolutely been times where
I've been in the middle of a
season of a show, I've already watched
like five episodes and I'm like, man,
this is so good. And all of
a sudden I'm like, why am I
being entertained watching this? Why am I
being entertained by this?

Marcus Ivy (40:01):
But like I talked about yesterday, the
deceptive words. Sometimes you can say those
deceptive words for yourself. You can deceive
yourself. That's not that bad.

Oh yeah.

Marcus Ivy (40:11):
You know, they're not showing nothing. You
know, I'm watching it by myself. You
know, there's nothing going on. I'm. I'm
good watching this show or participating in
this. It's not that bad. We deceives
our. We deceive ourselves.

It's crazy. There's a lot of heart
checks.

There's a lot of nuance to all
this too. So like, I, I don't
want somebody to be like, man, Brent,
don't even. He won't even allow a
TV in his house. Like, we're not,
we're not going there.

Marcus Ivy (40:34):
No, we're not. Going.

But caution.

That's a whole. Whole thing. So if
you want to know what to watch
or what not to watch, leave it
in the comments and we'll let you
know. And I'm just playing.

We just have a thumbs up or.

Marcus Ivy (40:47):
A thumbs down or maybe sideways.

Right.

Pray about that one.

Right? No, that's.

Marcus Ivy (40:53):
But you know, and I know we
mentioned, you know, like, a lot of
people use that, you know, I wait
till Holy Spirit convict me. Well, how
long you gonna wait when he already
did it? You know, and that's part
of that being callous, you know. Oh,
he didn't convict me on this yet.
You know, he. Yeah, probably. So you
just don't want to hear.

Oh, no, he hasn't convicted me about
living with my girlfriend.

Marcus Ivy (41:10):
Right.

No. But his word says not to
do that. Like, do you need the
Holy Spirit conviction when it just plainly
says, like, hey, don't have sex outside
of marriage.

Marcus Ivy (41:20):
Right.

Yeah. It's so funny. I told David
yesterday, when we get to heaven, it's
going to be a lot. A lot
of Easter egg. You know how you.
The Easter egg moments where you. It's
like all these clues around you that
it was like, it's always been there.
God's going to. It's always been there,
and you totally missed it.

Marcus Ivy (41:39):
God has given us so many. For
you should be.

I would both love and absolutely hate
if, like, you get to heaven and
God's like, all right, we're gonna replay
your life.

Oh, my goodness.

And I'm just gonna have commentary.

Oh, my God. That would be. Okay.

See, Brent, when you said that, that.
That was not what you were supposed
to say. All right, Brent, so you
see how you went there? You were
actually supposed.

Oh, my goodness.

I would love that. And I would
hate that at the same time. Like,
it'd be so devastating.

I know it would be. Man, all
the moments we missed, all the moments.

Marcus Ivy (42:13):
Coming to a theater near you.

Man, I. I had that. That moment
the other day where it was like
somebody came and talked to me about
something, and then they left and, like,
they walked away. And after they walked
away, I was like, I should have
prayed for them. Why didn't. Why don't
I pray for them? And I, like,
look out. And then they're gone.

Marcus Ivy (42:31):
And I'm like, that's gonna be on
your real.

Yeah, yeah. Holy Spirit's gonna be like,
I tried to get your attention, but
you were so focused on something else,
you didn't even realize that that was
a moment for you to pray for
them.

Marcus Ivy (42:43):
Yeah.

That's. Listen, man. That's a real man.
That's even convicting within itself. Like, why
we need God even more. Like waking
up. I'm gonna wake up and just
stand in the middle of the room,
be like, okay, God, what are we
doing today? Because I don't want to
miss nothing. Just. No, that's so good.
Before we do that, before we go
to husband and wives, I do what

(43:06):
one thing I really. I've been waiting,
and I'm not going there yet, because
I do want to. Pig. It was
a verse, I think it was 13
and 14 that I really love. But
when it says. But when anything is
exposed by the light, it becomes visible.
For anything that becomes visible is light.
Therefore, it says awake. Oh, sleepers. And

(43:27):
arise from the dead and Christ. And
Christ will shine on you. I love
that word, awake. Oh, sleeper. What do.
Let's. Let's expound on that. What do
you think that means?

Marcus Ivy (43:37):
It's a spiritual awakening. Spiritual. Let's get
up. Yeah, like, get up. You know,
you, everybody. What's that term? Woke. I'm
woke. Wake up in Christ. You know
what I'm saying? Yeah. If we can
say so many things and adopt so
many terms, but this awakened. Wake up,
sleep. So many people are dead in

(43:58):
their sin and just dead to just
the knowledge of Christ. It's time to
wake up. And even saints, it's time
to wake up. We can be kind
of nodding off sometimes. It's just time
to wake up, wake up. Everybody who
sleep, everybody just wake up. You know,
the time is drawing near. It's getting

(44:21):
closer and closer. And I wouldn't dare
be caught. Sleep on a job, you
know, on a job. And then, unfortunately,
we can look at the disciples. They
were asleep. Jesus told them to stay
awake. It's kind of like a repeating
thing. Like, man, they couldn't stay awake.
But, yeah, we came. He's like, man,
wake up, y'all. Like, it's this urgency,
I think, behind this, I think, you
know, so, yeah, just wake up.

What I love is 13 and 14
is followed by 15.

That's what maybe.

And so that. And that's, you know,
that's not just how numbers work. That's
how the Paul's train of thought goes.
Like, so the. The wake up is.
Is the motivation for walking wisdom. Being
careful how you're living, not being unwise,
but wise. Making the most of opportunity.
Like, you can't make it the most
of an opportunity if you miss it.

(45:10):
Like, if you're asleep to it. Yeah,
right. So I Think that. That they
can all kind of gels together.

Marcus Ivy (45:16):
Right.

I love that really quick first love
when he. I think it was William
McDowell, when he was, like, highlighting the
difference between revival and the awakening. And
I thought that was really cool. I
don't know if I've ever read it
in scripture yet. I'm trying to recount
in my head about the awakening phrase,

(45:37):
but how he said, like, the revival
was for those who are lost in
the awakening is for the children. Church.
I don't even know.

I don't remember the. The. That part
of the.

Yeah. So. But it was, to me,
that stood out because we hear a
lot of people talking about revival, and.
And I liked how he said the
awakening was for those who were already
here. And so maybe I got to
study it some more. But maybe the
two correlate with, like, awakening as a
believer.

I. I have had conversations with people
before. They're like, man, I really hate
the term revival, because revival means something's
dead. And if the church needs revival,
that means the church is dead. Like,
if we get to a point where
we need revival, we have screwed something
up big time for too long. So.

Marcus Ivy (46:22):
Right.

I think the. The awakening could be.

Sleep. You stop sleeping.

Stop sleeping during my sermons.

Yeah, yeah. No, it don't have nothing
to do with. You.

Ain'T throwing no shade.

No, you ain't gonna throw no shade.
Okay, let me stop laughing and go
to the next part. Wives and husbands,
we don't even have to stay there
long. Let's give. If you had an
opportunity to talk on that portion, what

(46:59):
would you have said? What illustration would
you have given?

Marcus Ivy (47:03):
I probably would have brought my wife
on stage and said, husbands do everything
that she.

Okay, that was a cop out.

Marcus Ivy (47:12):
I wouldn't have done that. I think
me and Pastor Brent kind of talk
about this on the passing is that
we have to be responsible of our
own roles, our own directives that were
given to us within this passage. You
know, it says, wives, submit to your
own husbands. And, you know, a lot
of times husbands bring that to the
court. My wife's supposed to submit to

(47:34):
me and this and all of that.
But why are you so concerned of
what she's supposed to be doing when
you have directions to follow as well?
So I can't be concerned about my
wife submitting me, submitting to me when
I'm supposed to love her, and I'm
not doing that, and vice versa. She
can't be concerned about me loving her
when she's not submitting to me. So
everyone has this role for the lack

(47:56):
of better words to do, to follow,
and you can't. Yeah. Do they cross
every once in a while? Yeah. Yeah.
But we're talking about based upon what
the word says. It says that wives
are supposed to do this and husbands
are supposed to do this. And it's
specific, and that's what we need to
kind of stick to, you know, And
I think that's where a lot of

(48:16):
issues where come within marriage is. Because
you're worrying about what I supposed to
be doing or you're not taking care
of what you're supposed. Supposed to be
doing.

Okay.

Yeah. I think that for me, that's
the. Probably the biggest point to make
with this passage is first of all,
it's wives submit to your own husband.
Some people have twisted that to be.
Women submit to men.

Because I was gonna say the own
husband thing is sticking out to me.

Yeah. So, like, you're married.

Yes.

But that doesn't mean you have to
submit to me.

Marcus Ivy (48:49):
Right.

Because I ain't your husband. Right, right.
You submit to David. And so we
just have to be careful of what
is the actual parameters of this. It's
not a blanket statement. All women submit
to all men. Yeah, It's. It's supposed
to be a structure because it's this
whole thing, the whole purpose of it,
It's a model.

Yep.

Right. Like my relationship with soul is
supposed to be a demonstration of Christ's
relationship with the church, the body of
Christ. And so I do my part,
she does her part. And we're a
reflection for people around us of God.
And so, yes, we. We absolutely have
to then focus on our part. If.

(49:28):
If I get so caught up in
trying to force my wife to do
her part, I'm already out of line,
I'm already out of bounds. And so
I need to do my part. And
here's the hardest part for. For couples,
I do my part regardless of her
execution of hers. So I love my

(49:51):
wife even when she doesn't respect me.
And I've had too many conversations with
men that say, well, I can't love
her because she doesn't respect me. Or
I stop loving her because she stopped
respecting me. It's like, it really don't
matter. Like, you are called to you,
you committed. I'm marrying this woman. Now.

(50:12):
Your commitment is, I will love her
regardless of how she responds to that
love, regardless of what she does towards
me, I will love her wives. I'm
going, we're gonna respect my husband regardless
of. But he's not loving me the
way I want to be loved. I'm
sorry. That sucks. Try and get him
into marital counseling and fix that thing.

(50:34):
However, that doesn't give you permission to
stop doing your part.

Marcus Ivy (50:37):
Yeah.

And that's. That's probably where people are
going to wrestle with us the most,
is when the other party doesn't do
their part. Which is why Paul will
all say, don't be unequally yoked in
the first place. In the first place.

Marcus Ivy (50:48):
Yes, some of us.

We get our. We get ourselves in
a problem because, like, look, I have
an amazing marriage, but it's because my
wife does her part, I do my
part, and it works.

Marcus Ivy (50:59):
And you have to. That's something you
have to learn. Something that doesn't come
overnight, where it's automatic. Well, I'll just
speak for Marcus. It didn't come over,
you know, because, you know, you're in
this new relationship. You're married, you have
kids, you're working, you're doing all of
these things. You got careers, and, you
know, the only thing you're seeing in

(51:19):
that person is what they're not doing.
And I'm not concerned about what I'm
doing. Cause you supposed to be my
wife. I know what you supposed to
be doing. Right. But I'm not learning.
I'm not learning how to be. Take
my role as a husband. And so
you get this mixture of, now I'm
over in your Kool Aid, and you
trying to find out what my flavor
is, and everybody is all messed up.

(51:40):
Right?

And. And Kool Aid and flavors.

I was like, okay, we got to
go there.

Marcus Ivy (51:46):
Different flavors. Yeah. I don't know.

Am I too white for that reference?

Maybe. But he.

Marcus Ivy (51:52):
He's also a kid showing my age.
Yeah. Yeah.

I. Anyways, I'm just playing with that,
too, though. I love that you talk
about learning, because it. It's not as
simple as. Well, I love my wife
because I do these things, and so
that. That means I love her. Does
she know that? Does she feel that?
Right? And so, like, for me, like,

(52:18):
it goes back to the. The love
languages, which isn't really biblical, but it's
great. Like psychology, Right? Like, I had
to learn, how does my wife receive
love?

Marcus Ivy (52:30):
Yes.

Because I thought that when I just
walked by and said, hey, I love
you, that she got warm tinglies.

Marcus Ivy (52:36):
Yeah.

And it's like, no, no. When. When.
So her thing is acts of service
and gifts. So, like, when I show
up with a gift out of nowhere,
she's like, oh, you really do love
me. And it's like, But I said
I love you 18 times today. But
it was the gift that I brought.
It was the, hey, I know you've
been asking for me to change the
mirror in the bathroom. And so I
went ahead and I changed the mirror

(52:58):
in the bathroom, which.

Is a real thing.

Which is a very real thing. There's
literally at the trash pile right now
is the old mirror.

I heard.

So. So, like, there. There are things
that I thought I was doing to
show her love. And there were seasons
in our marriage where she was like,
I just. I don't feel like you
love me. And I'm like, but, like,
I've been doing all these things. But
it wasn't how she was receiving the
love. And that works both ways. You
know, there a woman may say, but
I. I do respect and honor my

(53:27):
husband. It's like, okay, but when you
talk to him, the way you talked
to him the other day, when you
criticize the way he was talking with
the kids, the way you did that
communicated to him, I don't respect you.
I don't honor you. And so you
actually have to have a conversation with
your spouse and find out, okay, how
do I communicate these things to you?

(53:47):
How do I make sure that you
feel what I'm trying to help you
feel like? If it's the wife, how
do I show respect and honor you?
If it's the husband, how do I
love you in a way that you
know that I love you without just
it being word. And it may be
words. And sometimes it is. My wife's
like, hey, I just need to hear
you say, I love you. I was

(54:08):
like, okay, I love you. And she's
like, okay, sometimes it's as simple as
that. But communication is. Is where. Where
it all comes together. And. And one
of the brilliant things about God is
he designed us and then gave us
rules based on our design. And so
he designed women for a need for

(54:30):
this affection and this. This love. And
then he designs men with this need
for honor and respect, and then he
gives the other one the job of
providing. Right. Which is why you need
both parties to be doing their part,

(54:50):
or somebody's going to feel left out.

Marcus Ivy (54:53):
Yeah.

I would even say, oh, my gosh,
I just had this conversation with a
sister. This is why it's important to
have a good relationship or work towards
that with your husband. Because if you
have these male and female friendships, you
start giving each other those things that

(55:13):
were meant to be given to your
spouse, start looking for.

It from other places.

Yes. So I think that's you know,
important to point out here, the, the
last thing I wanted to kind of
end with was verse 32, because it's
just a question I have. And I'm
wondering if others have this question, why
is. It seems very clear about marriage
and the different roles we have, but

(55:38):
why does it say this mystery is
profound? And I am saying that it
refers to Christ and the church. Why
is it a mystery, the connection.

Between Christ and the church and man
and woman. So he. He ties first,
he ties it back into Genesis where
he says, therefore a man shall leave
his father and mother, hold fast to
his wife, and two shall become one
flesh. He's referencing back to Genesis when
that takes place. And he's basically saying
it was a mystery because Christ and

(56:09):
the church wasn't there. But when Adam
and Eve were formed, it was. It
was a future picture of the. The
relationship between Adam and Eve is the
picture that is going to come several
thousand years later in the first century
between Christ and the church, the head
and the body, the love and the
honor and the respect that's going back
and forth. The sacrifice, man, we didn't

(56:29):
even talk about that. But some, some,
sometimes women are like, man, how come
we got the hard job? Like, we
have to respect him and honor him
and all he has to do is
love us like we're so lovely, okay?
But he defines that love as sacrifice.

Marcus Ivy (56:42):
Sacrifice.

Like Christ loved the church by dying
for it, sacrificing his life. So that
means the love that a husband's supposed
to give to his wife is complete,
total sacrifice. The husband walks into. And
this, this is where it's so funny
to me that women are like, man,
but I have to, I have to
respect him and he's my authority and

(57:03):
I have to listen to him. It's
like, yeah, but he has to die
for you. Which means if he's actually
doing his part, how would you not
respect that? How could you not honor
that? How could you not be like,
I'm gonna submit to that? I mean,
he's. He's willing to put his needs
second. Yeah.

Marcus Ivy (57:20):
There's an automatic respect for the armed
forces because they die for this country.
And so you hear people, you know,
thank you for your service. Thank you
for your service. But same, same way,
you know, they're going to. To die.
You know, like, literally die. They supposed
to.

Yeah. So. So, husbands, if you're really
loving your wife, that means she comes
first.

Marcus Ivy (57:38):
And everything comes first in everything.

I love that you say you're not
biased on your truths. Like, you Just
stand ten toes down in, in any
area. Cuz when you go to your
small group this week, I'm sure that's
going to be an interesting conversation with
the man in your group. Man, that,
that's real life. And I can, and
I can say I'm very grateful that
I have a husband who I see

(58:03):
die to himself every day to love
me because I'm. I could be difficult
just being honest. It got real quiet.
It got real.

Marcus Ivy (58:17):
I'm looking at the scriptures.

That's what, that's how you know we're.

Family here at wife for 17 years.
I know when to keep my mouth
shut.

Marcus Ivy (58:25):
Man, my head went straight to word.

Oh, look at that. I got a
lot of things highlighted. I wonder what
I have highlighted here.

Well, this is a great way to
end the show. How about that? At
least I have self awareness. We're not
gonna go there. I'm very aware that
I could be difficult sometimes and my
family here at D.C. knows that not
at all.

You're a joy to have on the
team.

Thank you.

I mean that.

Oh, you mean it?

I mean it.

Okay. Oh, see, thank you.

No sarcasm at all.

Okay, today. No, just fine. Anyway, as
we end, what is the takeaway from
this chapter that we can just leave
with our audience to kind of meditate
on? So we used to do a
contest, but we kind of took that
out because Pastor Brent would always win
because he's had years of studying one
book. So he always.

Marcus Ivy (59:18):
This is his favorite.

This is his favorite.

Marcus Ivy (59:20):
Definitely not doing no contest.

We don't have a chance. So just
share a moment or a takeaway for
the audience from this passage.

Marcus Ivy (59:30):
Just keep walking. You know, no matter
what comes in your life, no matter
what trials and tribulations, we all know
that we're in this evil days, and
I said it yesterday. You know, this
is no condemnation, Right. But it's not
avenue for excuses either. So just keep

(59:50):
walking. If you fall, if you trip,
just keep walking. Mature and you'll grow.
You know, the longer you walk, the
stronger your legs to get. Keep going.
Don't be so down on yourself. If
something does trip you up, just get
up and keep walking. You know, there's
a lot of things in this chapter
that, you know, we have to face

(01:00:10):
head on and just be true to
yourself. Be real. Yeah, I'm dealing with
this. Lord, help me. Help me with
this. You know, I'm dealing with that.
Lord, help me with this. And just.
Just keep walking.

Ti’heasha Beasley (01:00:21):
That's good. I was just being convicted
in the moment while you Were talking.

Marcus Ivy (01:00:26):
Oh, that's why you put your head
down.

Put my hand down. Thank you, Holy
Spirit. Okay. What about you, Pastor Brad?

Pastor Brent McQuay (01:00:32):
I mean, Obviously I love 15 and
16. That's the verse. But for our
church right now, as disciples, our number
one goal is to become more like
Christ. So start with verse one. Let
verse one be your motivation. Verse one
is, therefore, be imitators of God as
beloved children. So the whole point of

(01:00:52):
this walk that we're on is to
imitate Christ, like, to become more like
him. And if you use that as
your model, then it's like, okay, would
Jesus say these things? No, then I
shouldn't say these things. Okay, would Jesus
go to these places and do these
things? Things that I'm doing? No, I
probably shouldn't do those things. Right. And
then, okay, what did. How did Jesus

(01:01:13):
treat people? How did he forgive? How
did he love? How did he talk
to people? And so if Jesus did
it, I should probably follow suit. So
if you start with be imitators of
God, that that's going to become the
fuel, the motivation for everything else. Yeah.

And I think I want to just
add one more thing. So, you know,
we talked about being in darkness and
stuff. We walked in that. That's who
we were. We did. We practice that
every day. So now that we're in
Christ, the more practice we, you know,
so, so, so the more I got
better and better at sin, the more
I did it because that's who I
was. So now that I'm not in

(01:01:47):
darkness, now that I'm not darkness, the
more and more we walk in Christ
and become like Christ, the more more,
you know, we. We will step and
start looking like Christ. So, you know,
it's almost like you. I used to
tell the guys that I used to
work with, it's like you spent this
many years doing the wrong thing, and
you have perfected this. Well, not really,
because you got caught. But you've done

(01:02:09):
these things for so long. Take the
same energy like Paul and transfer it
over into this good thing, and good
things will start falling off. Stuff that
you may have had habits with or,
you know, some stuff will just fall
off. You don't even know it's gone.
Oh, man, I don't even do that
anymore. And that's why I stress just
to keep walking. Yeah, Just to keep
walking.

That's good.

Yeah. Some. Something interesting about that. The
walking in darkness. There was a time
in your life when you were. And
I say you, as in all of
us doing the wrong thing. Proudly.

Yes.

Openly There's a danger in believers who
now know better but still want to
do those things. And so now they're
turning off the flashlight and they've gotten
really good at hiding the sin and
they've kept that thing in darkness and
they've kept that thing hidden from, from

(01:03:09):
the people around them. And so like,
the caution that I would give for
people right now is if the. If
reading through Ephesians, you're starting to see
all these habits, all these things that
you're not supposed to be doing, and
you've gotten really good at hiding those
things from your spouse, from your friends,
from. From other believers, man. Use this
as an opportunity to shine light on

(01:03:30):
it.

Yep.

That's so good. And the way to
top it all off that came to
me was arise, arise from verse 13
and 14. So that's all I have.

Wake up.

Wake up. It's time to wake up
because we need you for such a
time as this. We hope you've been
enjoying this conversation with us with the
book of Ephesians. We are just loving
it over here, as you can tell.
Go ahead. And if you haven't had
an opportunity to watch the replays from
any of the sermons the last five

(01:04:03):
weeks, go ahead and do that. Check
it out. Also, we've been having amazing
conversations here on between sermons, so make
sure you catch up up there because
it's coming to the end next week.
Are you guys sad? I am. Actually,
we're a little sad over here because
it's such a good book. But if
you are in a season where you
feel like God is taking you deeper,
sharpening you, this is a great sermon

(01:04:25):
to like indulge in and really study
and take to your small groups, take
to your friend conversations. It's a really
good just tool to use for 2025.
So go ahead, like share and comment
on this video. Continue to like the
page. We love that you're connecting with
us and until time. We love you
and we'll see you soon.

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