Beyond Broken Vows | Christian Marriage, Adultery, Pornography Addiction, Sexual Betrayal, Intimacy
***Top 1.5% Global Podcast*** Dear Betrayed, Are you in shock? Confused, devastated, hurt, angry and feeling like you are not enough? Do you feel like it must be your fault, like you should have somehow seen the signs? Are you grieving the death of the marriage you thought you had? Dear Betrayer, Have you been believing the lie that if people knew what was really in your heart and mind, they would turn their back on you? Have you been convinced that your wife and family would leave you and you would lose everything if/when you came clean? Beloved, do you both feel like your marriage is over? Well, you’re right. That marriage full of secrets and lies IS over. But now there is hope for an honest and transparent marriage - one full of trust, safety, connection, forgiveness, acceptance, and intimacy that you’ve never known before. Bold statement, right? You may be thinking, “No way!” That’s okay. We understand… Hi, we are Johnny and Emily Spigelmire and we have been where you are... As a result of adultery fueled by pornography, the marriage vows we had exchanged as starry-eyed newlyweds and had worked so hard to keep were eventually shattered. We’ve been through hell and back. But we are here, together, to let you know that this devastation we experienced was actually a gift. Of course, we didn’t see it that way at first and you probably don’t either. But, through a commitment to recovery, our faith in God, and our hope for redemption, we set out on a journey of healing, and we can’t wait to share what we’ve learned with you. We now have a marriage that continually blows our minds, and we give God all the glory! So, if you’re ready to move from heartbreak and pain to hope and healing, grab your favorite beverage, get comfy, and join us on a journey of faith as we talk through difficult questions like; Is there hope for our marriage? Can I fix all the damage I’ve done? Can I ever trust again? Is true intimacy even possible? We will also do deep dives into the topics of: * Isolation * Guilt and Shame * Anger * Rejection * Addiction * Trauma * Body Image * Triggers * Communication * And more… Our story, like yours, is a messy one. But, with God’s help, it is possible to recover what was lost, stolen, or given away. We know this because God has turned the ashes of our lives into something beautiful and we believe he can do that for you too. You can connect with us at: support@beyondbrokenvows.com https://insider.beyondbrokenvows.com/ https://coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com/ We would love to be part of your journey to healing and wholeness!
Episodes
We hope you were able to find some special moments this Christmas even if you are walking through the pain of sexual betrayal. You may be really glad that this year is ending, but not sure next year will be any better.
We’re just dropping in for a quick message of encouragement today and give you some hope and direction for this coming year.
We are sharing an inspiring and meaningful message from Sarah Young the author of Jesus...
As a wife, you may be reeling from the news of sexual betrayal and you are in shock, grieving, and lost.
Or as a husband, your infidelity may have recently been discovered and the shame is suffocating and you feel like you are going to lose your wife and everyone who truly matters to you.
And you may be saying to yourself, “I am alone and I have no hope”.
Our mission here at Beyond Broken Vows is to tell our story of how sexu...
True healing from sexual sin and betrayal is a journey that goes beyond just stopping certain behaviors; it demands a fundamental transformation of the heart.
For husbands, the journey to rebuild trust and find healing can be challenging, filled with obstacles that can slow down progress and unintentionally cause more conflict. Often we can get in our own way without realizing it.
In this episode, we'll identify six spiritual a...
When a wife discovers her husband’s sexual betrayal, her world shatters. The path to healing is difficult enough without unknowingly creating additional roadblocks.
In this episode, we explore 4 common but counterproductive patterns that keep Christian wives stuck in their pain.
We’ll identify these self-sabotaging behaviors, uncover the biblical truths that dismantle them, and provide practical steps to help you start moving f...
After the discovery and disclosure of sexual betrayal in a marriage, couples who choose to stay married and embrace the healing and recovery journey, will eventually need to address their sexuality again.
This will look different for every couple, but the ultimate goal is to have a healthier sexual intimacy than before the destruction of porn-fueled infidelity came to light.
We have been working on this part of our marriage rel...
We understand you may be in the middle of the fall-out from sexual betrayal in your marriage. Maybe you just found out, or you have been found out. Maybe you’ve been walking this path for a while and still feel like you can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel.
As the holiday season approaches, this unwanted and extremely painful circumstance can destroy all the anticipation of spending special time with family and friends. T...
The aftermath of sexual betrayal is a complete upheaval of a marriage’s foundation. It doesn’t just damage trust—it systematically dismantles it, leaving a wife questioning her entire reality. The world she knew is gone, replaced by a landscape of pain, confusion, and profound uncertainty.
For husbands who have broken our marriage vows, this new reality teaches us a critical truth: trust is not a default setting. It's more like a...
Today we honor our veterans who defended our land, people, and way of life—a commitment reflecting a biblical understanding of nationhood. The military is a God-ordained institution for maintaining order (Romans 13), and honoring veterans acknowledges this divine role.
Their sacrifice secured our religious freedom, allowing us to worship and spread the Gospel. A strong national defense protects our Christian civilization, as stre...
The devastation of sexual betrayal leaves no part of a marriage untouched. It obliterates the very trust the relationship was built upon.
For the spouse who discovers the lies and hidden double life, it’s as if the floor has vanished beneath their feet. Their entire understanding of reality is fractured in an instant, leaving them disoriented and questioning everything they thought was true.
And husbands who have been unfaithfu...
Sexual betrayal destroys all trust in a marriage. When the lies and double life of an unfaithful husband (or wife) come to light, the betrayed spouse has no solid ground to stand on. What was real is instantly shattered and nothing is clear anymore.
It can leave an unfaithful spouse struggling for a way to regain the trust that was selfishly tossed aside. Trust is earned - not expected just by virtue of staying married.
But whe...
When trust has been shattered after marital infidelity is revealed through either discovery or confession, what hope does a repentant husband have for regaining his wife’s trust? Will she ever be able to trust him again?
These are common questions many couples ask as they sift through the rubble of what was once considered to be a happy, loving, and committed marriage.
Fortunately, there is an answer to this difficult question ...
When infidelity shatters the reality of a perceived happy marriage and reveals a foundation crumbling under the weight of lies and deception, one of the most difficult losses is the trust that was instinctively given when exchanging vows to love, honor, and cherish one another.
This loss of trust can be more painful than betrayal itself. It can leave a wife on unsteady ground with little hope that any trust for her husband can be...
Have you ever thought about how the toughest barriers holding you back might not be out there in the world, but instead created in the hidden corners of your own mind?
For the man battling sex addiction, the compulsive behavior is often just the symptom of a deeper problem: a faulty belief system built on a foundation of shame, self-loathing, and the unshakable conviction that you are, at your core, unforgivable. This is the sile...
Navigating the aftermath of a husband’s sexual betrayal is a complex and deeply painful journey for a wife.
While a natural desire to support his recovery may exist, it often clashes with powerful, protective emotions born from the trauma itself.
The act of showing compassion can feel fraught with risk, not as a sign of a lack of love, but as a defense mechanism against further pain and a means of preserving her own fractured s...
When you hear the word “honesty,” what comes to mind? Is it a simple binary—you either tell the truth or you don’t?
Or do you see it on a sliding scale, where a “little white lie” is a 2 and a deliberate, premeditated deception is a 10?
If your marriage has been shattered by porn-fueled infidelity, you know the brutal truth: the lies and deception surrounding the acting out are often more destructive to trust than the acts them...
In marriages wounded by sexual betrayal, the deepest injury isn't the act itself, but the web of lies that concealed it.
It’s a staggering reality that the concept of honesty is not as straightforward as many would like to believe.
Lies can come in various forms, from outright falsehoods to subtle omissions and misleading statements, all of which can have profound effects on trust in relationships.
What is the key to complete...
What comes to mind when someone brings up 12-Step recovery?
Maybe you think of Alcoholics Anonymous?
Or perhaps group meetings?
Do you also wonder if 12-Step programs are only for those who don’t see Jesus as Savior and Lord of all?
Should followers of Christ consider participating, even if Jesus isn't the central focus?
There are certainly some common misconceptions about where the original twelve steps come from and how...
Today we wrap up our series, I Need You Where I AM. In the first episode of our series, we focused on a statement that many betrayed wives relate to, "My Husband Just Doesn’t 'Get It'.”
And what is the “it” he’s not getting? Not understanding the magnitude of what his actions through infidelity have done to her.
In the second episode in our series, we covered some of the ways betrayed wives are affected by their husband’s infi...
Today in the second installment of our series, I Need You Where I Am, we turn the spotlight fully onto the wreckage inside a wife’s body and soul after sexual betrayal.
The physical, emotional, and spiritual effects of betrayal trauma are real and profound. A wife experiencing these effects may think she is going crazy. She is not. It just feels that way.
As we talked about last week, a husband who “gets it” understands the mag...
Today we want to speak to both spouses who are bravely navigating the deep and challenging waters following a discovery and disclosure of sexual betrayal.
We understand that this emotional journey can feel overwhelming and may be difficult to sort out on your own.
Today we’re excited to present a relatable word-picture that aims to make the experience of a husband’s infidelity a little easier to understand for both partners.
...
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