Beyond Broken Vows | Christian Marriage, Adultery, Pornography Addiction, Sexual Betrayal, Intimacy
***Top 1.5% Global Podcast*** Dear Betrayed, Are you in shock? Confused, devastated, hurt, angry and feeling like you are not enough? Do you feel like it must be your fault, like you should have somehow seen the signs? Are you grieving the death of the marriage you thought you had? Dear Betrayer, Have you been believing the lie that if people knew what was really in your heart and mind, they would turn their back on you? Have you been convinced that your wife and family would leave you and you would lose everything if/when you came clean? Beloved, do you both feel like your marriage is over? Well, you’re right. That marriage full of secrets and lies IS over. But now there is hope for an honest and transparent marriage - one full of trust, safety, connection, forgiveness, acceptance, and intimacy that you’ve never known before. Bold statement, right? You may be thinking, “No way!” That’s okay. We understand… Hi, we are Johnny and Emily Spigelmire and we have been where you are... As a result of adultery fueled by pornography, the marriage vows we had exchanged as starry-eyed newlyweds and had worked so hard to keep were eventually shattered. We’ve been through hell and back. But we are here, together, to let you know that this devastation we experienced was actually a gift. Of course, we didn’t see it that way at first and you probably don’t either. But, through a commitment to recovery, our faith in God, and our hope for redemption, we set out on a journey of healing, and we can’t wait to share what we’ve learned with you. We now have a marriage that continually blows our minds, and we give God all the glory! So, if you’re ready to move from heartbreak and pain to hope and healing, grab your favorite beverage, get comfy, and join us on a journey of faith as we talk through difficult questions like; Is there hope for our marriage? Can I fix all the damage I’ve done? Can I ever trust again? Is true intimacy even possible? We will also do deep dives into the topics of: * Isolation * Guilt and Shame * Anger * Rejection * Addiction * Trauma * Body Image * Triggers * Communication * And more… Our story, like yours, is a messy one. But, with God’s help, it is possible to recover what was lost, stolen, or given away. We know this because God has turned the ashes of our lives into something beautiful and we believe he can do that for you too. You can connect with us at: support@beyondbrokenvows.com https://insider.beyondbrokenvows.com/ https://coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com/ We would love to be part of your journey to healing and wholeness!
Episodes
The disclosure is done. The secrets are out. Now what?
If you’ve been through Full Therapeutic Disclosure—or if you’re still mustering the courage to start—you know this isn’t the end. It’s the real beginning. Because truth doesn’t just expose the brokenness… it reveals the path forward.
This is the second half of our FTD episode—where we walk you through the final 3 steps of the disclosure process.
- The Impact Letter: He...
Marriage isn’t just a contract—it’s a covenant, a sacred vow before God and man.
But sexual betrayal doesn’t just break trust… it shatters the covenant itself. The foundation is cracked. The vows feel like a lie. And now, both of you are standing in the wreckage—one drowning in grief, the other paralyzed by guilt.
But here’s the truth: You can’t rebuild on broken ground. Before forgiveness, before reconciliation—before even dec...
Have you ever stumbled upon a quote that just felt like it was made for you? You know, the kind that resonates so deeply with what you’re going through that it seems like a turning point in your journey?
We all encounter those special quotes that cause us to pause and reflect. While we’re not promising that your life will be changed by them, today we’re sharing with you some of our own special sayings—affectionately dubbed BBVism...
In the tumultuous journey of marriage, trust is the cornerstone that holds this covenant union together. But what happens when this trust is shattered by sexual betrayal? How does a betrayed wife comprehend this new reality she never saw coming?
In today’s episode, we dive deep into these questions with the insightful perspectives of Robin Wilson and Christy Bottom, authors of their newly released book, Who is God Now: Hope In Go...
Have you ever stepped out in faith, trusting God’s call even when the road ahead looked uncertain?
Two years ago, we took that leap—surrendering our fears, our past hurts, and our plans, to follow where Jesus was leading us. And we’re here to tell you: God has been faithful. Not just in sustaining us, but in growing us—deepening our marriage, stretching our faith, and opening doors in ministry we never could’ve imagined.
This j...
Infidelity profoundly shakes the emotional foundation of a marriage, often leading to feelings of confusion, mistrust, and pain. In the midst of all this chaos, it's common for couples to feel unsure of how to find their way forward.
In this episode, we’re excited to explore how the Emotions Wheel, based on Plutchik’s theory and Willcox’s tool, can be a wonderful resource for couples facing the aftermath of betrayal.
By usin...
When sexual betrayal shatters a marriage, the deepest wounds often come with agonizing questions—especially about God’s timing. Why did He allow the lies to continue for years? Where was He when the vows were being broken?
In this raw conversation, we tackle the three most tormenting questions betrayed wives ask God, and the surprising hope Scripture offers both the betrayed and the betrayer.
This isn’t an episode about quick f...
Being betrayed by hidden infidelity is like walking through a museum you helped build—room by room, the laughter, whispered promises, and the quiet certainty of a shared history. Every glance, every touch, every “I love you” hung like priceless art on walls you thought would stand forever.
But somewhere deep in the walls, a gas leak has been growing—invisible, silent, deadly. You walked through those halls for years, never smelli...
The discovery of sexual betrayal in your marriage can feel like a punch in the gut, leaving you reeling and unsure of what to do next.
As a betrayed wife, you are experiencing trauma. As a husband who has been found unfaithful, you are probably scared and trying to fix what you’ve broken. Neither one of you are sure what the future will look like.
But if you are listening to our podcast, you’re taking a brave step in the right ...
In this raw and emotional episode, we dive into the painful reality of how the phrase “I love you” can feel hollow and even triggering after sexual betrayal in marriage.
When those same words were whispered to someone outside the covenant, they lose their sacred weight—leaving the betrayed spouse questioning their truth. We explore the agony of speaking (or hearing) “I love you” when trust has been shattered, and why those words ...
Today we are so excited to dive into a conversation on the destructive impact of marital infidelity and the journey of healing and restoration with our special guests Matthew and Joanna Raabsmith.
Matthew and Joanna will share their deeply personal experience with sexual betrayal in their marriage and how they overcame this devastation to experience a marriage they never dreamed possible. Now, they're on mission to help others f...
In our 100th episode of the Beyond Broken Vows podcast, we’re throwing a little celebration for the incredible journey of our podcast and the amazing work that God has done through it.
Join us as we share our personal experiences navigating the tricky waters of pornography and infidelity in our marriage. We’ll dive into the real challenges couples often face when reaching out for help.
Together, we’ll explore ten common hurdles...
On today’s episode, we delve into the topic of euphoric recall, a painful yet critical aspect of sexual addiction recovery.
Emily shares her perspective as a betrayed wife, highlighting the emotional turmoil that accompanies these intrusive memories.
Meanwhile, Johnny explains his own experiences with euphoric recall and outlines a robust four-step battle plan to confront and dissolve these recollections.
It’s not a pleasant ...
Today we’re tackling an incredibly important topic: porn withdrawal and its impact on those bravely striving to break free from porn addiction.
We chat about both the mental and physical symptoms that can pop up during this journey, along with the challenges people often face when trying to leave behind the familiar paths of addiction.
We’ll share some practical steps to help you overcome these hurdles with confidence. We’ll al...
What is addiction?
How does it work?
Is it just about deciding to stop destructive behaviors?
Addiction can be a mystery for many couples. Husbands may wonder if they are addicts after betraying their spouse. Wives often struggle to understand how their partner could engage in such hurtful actions for so long.
When our marriage faced sexual betrayal six years ago, we were just as confused about sexual addiction as many of y...
When it comes to confronting the aftermath of sexual betrayal, each of us will set out on a unique journey to healing and restoration.
This was certainly true of our guest April Truitt. April shares the deeply personal and transformative story of her marriage's journey through infidelity. After discovering her husband's affair, April recounts the emotional devastation and the path to recovery that followed. She discusses the underl...
After sexual betrayal is discovered in a marriage and the couple decides to embark on the journey to recovery, there are many opportunities for social events to become emotionally challenging, causing what many call triggers.
Today we recount a fun, awkward, semi-harrowing story of our weekend adventure at a pirate-themed wedding; fraught with danger, and also some victories.
Listen in to hear which tools in our relational tool...
You may be wondering if sex will ever be fulfilling and satisfying for you or your spouse now that the reality of sexual betrayal has invaded your marriage.
If you are at the very beginning of the discovery and disclosure of infidelity through pornography or other sexual expressions outside of your marriage, you might be wondering if you’ll ever have sex again, or if you’ll even want to have sex with your spouse again.
It’s a v...
Connection...
When you think about connecting with others, what comes to mind?
What does it truly mean to be connected, and what are healthy connections? And speaking of healthy connections, it makes you wonder—are there unhealthy connections?
What do your connections look like in your life?
Join us today as we dive into these intriguing questions and explore the meaning of connections together!
We pray this blesses you,
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