January 31, 2024 • 13 mins
In this episode, I wanted to give some info on what it's like to be bipolar and be in a good place. Not manic and not depressed; not melancholic but just ok. I'm in a good place and I just wanted to share that.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Hello and welcome to Bipolar Thoughts. My name is Steven and I'll be your host.
(00:09):
Hello everybody and welcome to today's show. I know it's been a little while since I made
a full episode and I haven't been consistent but like I said in one of my other videos
I've had a lot of shit going on. I've had a few deaths in the family and some other things
(00:31):
kind of going on. Just a lot of personal shit going on. Schools kick back up again and I'm
trying to get back in the swing of things. I've got fraternities and fucking organizations
and student government. Everything else that like is just a bunch of shit and then like
(00:52):
on top of that that's just out that's just in school things and there's outside things
that I'm trying to that I'm a part of that I'm trying to work on that take up time. So
it's just been I found myself in like not necessarily taken on more than I'm like biting
off more than I could chew but found myself more occupied than I used to be. So that's
(01:17):
why things have just kind of been a little bit more inconsistent than they normally have
or that they used to be I guess. And I still haven't got rid of this rickety fucking chair.
I don't know when I'm going to. Here in the summer things are probably going to change.
(01:37):
I believe that my kids are going to be coming. So I'm going to have all three of them which
means that I'm going to lose my office which means I'm going to have to figure out some
kind of new setup and when and how I'm going to record because that's going to be it's
going to be interesting. We'll figure that out. But I'm actually in a pretty good place
(02:00):
right now. I mean I don't want to jinx that you know knock on wood but I feel like for
once in a long time like things are starting to kind of pan out the way that they're supposed
to. Like I said I'm not going to get into like each and every little thing just because
it's not really what's important. And honestly I kind of wanted to keep this as kind of a
(02:26):
shorter episode. I didn't really want it to go too too long. So but what's important is
that I am okay. I'm actually I'm doing okay. I wouldn't say that I'm like I'm not like
manic okay and I'm not like I'm just okay. And like it's a weird to say and it's hard
(02:51):
to like I guess wrap your mind around that especially if you're not like if you if you
don't have a back roller or if you don't have a mental health disorder or you know or anything
like that then it's like well yeah you're supposed to be okay. You know like I don't
know I don't know how to explain that but it's just like to be okay is like it's almost
(03:18):
like being melancholy but not but without the like the lethargic like shit that comes
with it I guess like with melancholy you're you're like you just don't give a shit and
it's not that I don't give a shit about things like I've definitely lost interest in things
so my depression still hasn't completely gone away. I'm just I'm okay. I'm not in a bad
(03:44):
place and but I'm I'm not in a great place but I'm I'm in a good place. I'm not I feel
like there are some things that have been kind of looming over my head that are starting
to kind of like work themselves out. Again my I guess that my kids are probably going
to be coming that's a whole another kink that's kind of I think starting to work itself
(04:08):
out and so I think things are starting to look up you know and that makes me feel good
makes me feel hopeful you know I wanted to give off some some information on this episode
about like what it's like to be bipolar and be in a good place but like I did some research
(04:33):
to try and find like some kind of like neurological connection or just I don't know anything and
maybe I just didn't do a good enough you know good enough search or deep dive or whatever
but I just really couldn't find a whole lot on like specifically on like what it's like
(04:53):
to be bipolar and be in like in a good place doesn't like everything just kind of came
up with like symptoms of bipolar and shit like that so it wasn't really like it was
kind of hard to find like real like deep dive evidence and again I wanted to keep this kind
of short so I didn't want to put too much too much into it. Like I said I've still got
(05:19):
some things that are kind of like looming over my head but they're they're starting to
work themselves out and I feel like things are falling into place the way that they're
supposed to. I feel like like the universe is kind of like I mean at some point I kind
of threw my hands up and was like alright look whatever whoever you're gonna have to
(05:43):
make everything happen you're gonna have to do this because I can't do it on my own you
know and I think that's an important thing especially for people with bipolar to understand
is that like it's okay to ask for help it's okay to say I'm not okay you know and even
doing that means that you are okay. I know that sounds kind of contradictory or like
(06:06):
sounds weird but just knowing that you're not okay means that you're doing okay enough
to recognize that you're not okay. It sounds weird but it's the truth I mean you know sorry
you know I mean and they even say like in recovery you know that like admitting is the
(06:31):
first step you know that you have a problem that's the first step well admitting that
you need help is kind of like the first step and it means that you're okay you know that
you're on the right path to being okay or better than just okay I guess I don't know.
(06:54):
But I did want to I did just kind of want to get all this out in the open as things
get updated I'll kind of let you guys know I'll talk about them more and more as like
as things become more solid then I'll kind of keep you guys updated and another sorry
(07:20):
about them not being like a ton of information in this one it just there wasn't a ton to
find at least for me if you can find it then great please please please send me links I
would love to do another episode you know with a deeper dive into this that would really
mean I would love that I don't know if you guys would but I would love to do a little
(07:44):
bit more about like what it's like to be you know or not even just bipolar but like to
have any kind of mental disorder and to like be or even in recovery if you have an addiction
and to just be okay not like not be you know wildly on the wild side we are you're just
synatically great and you know fucking rainbows and sunsions but you're not on the depressed
(08:10):
like I can't get out of bed don't want to you know or melancholic like don't give a
shit kind of kind of way either you just be and be okay that's a weird feeling for me
I don't I don't know that I've ever been able to just be like I don't I don't know if that's
(08:32):
the medicine or what I just started acupuncture a long ago from my back because I kind of
screwed my backup when I was in the military actually just up my percentage for it which
was a battle but actually it really wasn't all that hard if I actually got a really nice
(08:55):
lady this time this time around so that I will say that that was actually a pretty decent
experience with the VA which is very rare I'm kind of off rambling now that the point
of it is is that it's I guess my main message is that it's okay to just be okay I don't
(09:27):
know what else to say other than that I guess really my next big thing is is I want to hear
from you guys I haven't really had a chance to like hear from you guys so I would really
like for you guys to put in the comments whether you like this episode whether you would like
(09:48):
to hear more information about it if you have more information about it you know leave it
in the comments put you know put some links in there not just for me but for other people
you know because if there's if you leave a comment and somebody else sees it and your
comment might inspire somebody else so I might inspire you but you might inspire somebody
(10:10):
else and all of that inspires me so that's let's just kind of keep that train going I
guess I feel like this is kind of a shitty episode but it's 4.15 in the morning and I
got to get it in when I can I got shit I got to do after this start getting ready for school
(10:36):
but I wanted to at least get this done and at least get you guys updated a little bit
on you know kind of what's going on why I haven't been so consistent and then I promise
I'm going to try and be a little bit more consistent I'm working on a schedule once
I get my schedule with the fraternity and with a few other things kind of like some
(10:58):
of the kinks kind of worked out then I'll be able to figure out where I when I can be
a little bit more how I can be a little bit more consistent but right now things there's
just a lot of things just kind of up in the air so once those things figure themselves
out which they will in the next week or so some of them at least then I can I can build
(11:23):
a better schedule and I can be a little bit more consistent with you guys but I appreciate
all your help all your support and spread the love you know again not just for me I
love the support I love the community that we're building here but I want this to be
(11:45):
a community for other for everyone I want I want it not to just be based on me like
if I want you guys to leave a comment so that it like if you like it and you are you are
inspired by something or you have an idea or you have more information or something
leave it in the comments so that somebody else might see it because if they see it and
(12:09):
then they get inspired then maybe they'll go off and they'll make their own episode or
their own pocket you know what I mean like I feel like I don't want this to be centered
around me I want this to be centered around us as a community so if we help I don't know
(12:30):
that's that's just what my goal is again I feel like this was a shitty episode I apologize
I'm gonna end it just because I feel like I'm rambling and just wasting time and space
on this on this so I hope you enjoyed it or at least got something out of it like share
comment whatever we'll definitely like and share and comment subscribe cool I mean I'd
(12:59):
appreciate it but I really I just want to get the message out there that you don't have
to sit in the dark alone
Hello and welcome to Bipolar Thoughts. My name is Steven and I'll be your host.
(00:09):
Hello everybody and welcome to today's show. I know it's been a little while since I made
a full episode and I haven't been consistent but like I said in one of my other videos
I've had a lot of shit going on. I've had a few deaths in the family and some other things
(00:31):
kind of going on. Just a lot of personal shit going on. Schools kick back up again and I'm
trying to get back in the swing of things. I've got fraternities and fucking organizations
and student government. Everything else that like is just a bunch of shit and then like
(00:52):
on top of that that's just out that's just in school things and there's outside things
that I'm trying to that I'm a part of that I'm trying to work on that take up time. So
it's just been I found myself in like not necessarily taken on more than I'm like biting
off more than I could chew but found myself more occupied than I used to be. So that's
(01:17):
why things have just kind of been a little bit more inconsistent than they normally have
or that they used to be I guess. And I still haven't got rid of this rickety fucking chair.
I don't know when I'm going to. Here in the summer things are probably going to change.
(01:37):
I believe that my kids are going to be coming. So I'm going to have all three of them which
means that I'm going to lose my office which means I'm going to have to figure out some
kind of new setup and when and how I'm going to record because that's going to be it's
going to be interesting. We'll figure that out. But I'm actually in a pretty good place
(02:00):
right now. I mean I don't want to jinx that you know knock on wood but I feel like for
once in a long time like things are starting to kind of pan out the way that they're supposed
to. Like I said I'm not going to get into like each and every little thing just because
it's not really what's important. And honestly I kind of wanted to keep this as kind of a
(02:26):
shorter episode. I didn't really want it to go too too long. So but what's important is
that I am okay. I'm actually I'm doing okay. I wouldn't say that I'm like I'm not like
manic okay and I'm not like I'm just okay. And like it's a weird to say and it's hard
(02:51):
to like I guess wrap your mind around that especially if you're not like if you if you
don't have a back roller or if you don't have a mental health disorder or you know or anything
like that then it's like well yeah you're supposed to be okay. You know like I don't
know I don't know how to explain that but it's just like to be okay is like it's almost
(03:18):
like being melancholy but not but without the like the lethargic like shit that comes
with it I guess like with melancholy you're you're like you just don't give a shit and
it's not that I don't give a shit about things like I've definitely lost interest in things
so my depression still hasn't completely gone away. I'm just I'm okay. I'm not in a bad
(03:44):
place and but I'm I'm not in a great place but I'm I'm in a good place. I'm not I feel
like there are some things that have been kind of looming over my head that are starting
to kind of like work themselves out. Again my I guess that my kids are probably going
to be coming that's a whole another kink that's kind of I think starting to work itself
(04:08):
out and so I think things are starting to look up you know and that makes me feel good
makes me feel hopeful you know I wanted to give off some some information on this episode
about like what it's like to be bipolar and be in a good place but like I did some research
(04:33):
to try and find like some kind of like neurological connection or just I don't know anything and
maybe I just didn't do a good enough you know good enough search or deep dive or whatever
but I just really couldn't find a whole lot on like specifically on like what it's like
(04:53):
to be bipolar and be in like in a good place doesn't like everything just kind of came
up with like symptoms of bipolar and shit like that so it wasn't really like it was
kind of hard to find like real like deep dive evidence and again I wanted to keep this kind
of short so I didn't want to put too much too much into it. Like I said I've still got
(05:19):
some things that are kind of like looming over my head but they're they're starting to
work themselves out and I feel like things are falling into place the way that they're
supposed to. I feel like like the universe is kind of like I mean at some point I kind
of threw my hands up and was like alright look whatever whoever you're gonna have to
(05:43):
make everything happen you're gonna have to do this because I can't do it on my own you
know and I think that's an important thing especially for people with bipolar to understand
is that like it's okay to ask for help it's okay to say I'm not okay you know and even
doing that means that you are okay. I know that sounds kind of contradictory or like
(06:06):
sounds weird but just knowing that you're not okay means that you're doing okay enough
to recognize that you're not okay. It sounds weird but it's the truth I mean you know sorry
you know I mean and they even say like in recovery you know that like admitting is the
(06:31):
first step you know that you have a problem that's the first step well admitting that
you need help is kind of like the first step and it means that you're okay you know that
you're on the right path to being okay or better than just okay I guess I don't know.
(06:54):
But I did want to I did just kind of want to get all this out in the open as things
get updated I'll kind of let you guys know I'll talk about them more and more as like
as things become more solid then I'll kind of keep you guys updated and another sorry
(07:20):
about them not being like a ton of information in this one it just there wasn't a ton to
find at least for me if you can find it then great please please please send me links I
would love to do another episode you know with a deeper dive into this that would really
mean I would love that I don't know if you guys would but I would love to do a little
(07:44):
bit more about like what it's like to be you know or not even just bipolar but like to
have any kind of mental disorder and to like be or even in recovery if you have an addiction
and to just be okay not like not be you know wildly on the wild side we are you're just
synatically great and you know fucking rainbows and sunsions but you're not on the depressed
(08:10):
like I can't get out of bed don't want to you know or melancholic like don't give a
shit kind of kind of way either you just be and be okay that's a weird feeling for me
I don't I don't know that I've ever been able to just be like I don't I don't know if that's
(08:32):
the medicine or what I just started acupuncture a long ago from my back because I kind of
screwed my backup when I was in the military actually just up my percentage for it which
was a battle but actually it really wasn't all that hard if I actually got a really nice
(08:55):
lady this time this time around so that I will say that that was actually a pretty decent
experience with the VA which is very rare I'm kind of off rambling now that the point
of it is is that it's I guess my main message is that it's okay to just be okay I don't
(09:27):
know what else to say other than that I guess really my next big thing is is I want to hear
from you guys I haven't really had a chance to like hear from you guys so I would really
like for you guys to put in the comments whether you like this episode whether you would like
(09:48):
to hear more information about it if you have more information about it you know leave it
in the comments put you know put some links in there not just for me but for other people
you know because if there's if you leave a comment and somebody else sees it and your
comment might inspire somebody else so I might inspire you but you might inspire somebody
(10:10):
else and all of that inspires me so that's let's just kind of keep that train going I
guess I feel like this is kind of a shitty episode but it's 4.15 in the morning and I
got to get it in when I can I got shit I got to do after this start getting ready for school
(10:36):
but I wanted to at least get this done and at least get you guys updated a little bit
on you know kind of what's going on why I haven't been so consistent and then I promise
I'm going to try and be a little bit more consistent I'm working on a schedule once
I get my schedule with the fraternity and with a few other things kind of like some
(10:58):
of the kinks kind of worked out then I'll be able to figure out where I when I can be
a little bit more how I can be a little bit more consistent but right now things there's
just a lot of things just kind of up in the air so once those things figure themselves
out which they will in the next week or so some of them at least then I can I can build
(11:23):
a better schedule and I can be a little bit more consistent with you guys but I appreciate
all your help all your support and spread the love you know again not just for me I
love the support I love the community that we're building here but I want this to be
(11:45):
a community for other for everyone I want I want it not to just be based on me like
if I want you guys to leave a comment so that it like if you like it and you are you are
inspired by something or you have an idea or you have more information or something
leave it in the comments so that somebody else might see it because if they see it and
(12:09):
then they get inspired then maybe they'll go off and they'll make their own episode or
their own pocket you know what I mean like I feel like I don't want this to be centered
around me I want this to be centered around us as a community so if we help I don't know
(12:30):
that's that's just what my goal is again I feel like this was a shitty episode I apologize
I'm gonna end it just because I feel like I'm rambling and just wasting time and space
on this on this so I hope you enjoyed it or at least got something out of it like share
comment whatever we'll definitely like and share and comment subscribe cool I mean I'd
(12:59):
appreciate it but I really I just want to get the message out there that you don't have
to sit in the dark alone
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