PWM35: Walkin’ Cheese- Kerrang 62, Feb/March 1984 (part 1)

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
this next ACT uh asked me to read
this Black Sabbath Iron Maiden and Molly
Hatchet could not be here tonight but
they all had sex and are proud to
announce the birth of their two-headed
baby Tenacious D
[Music]

(00:26):
[Music]
right I'm
recording welcome welcome do you
want would you like to introduce this
week's episode uh you can

(00:48):
okay welcome to can IOD with Madness the
podcast uh for all your
karang 80s need
oh smooth what do what do we normally
say the podcast that looks at old issues
of Kang for some reason um yeah really

(01:09):
um really well delivered there I was I
was contacted by um our friends at
getting down and wordy podcast where
they talk about songs and they talk
about language and like words and they
also talk about Eurovision right um and
they said do you want to join a group of
podcasters who basically put ads on each

(01:31):
other's podcasts that's a good idea yeah
right so um we need to record an ad okay
I mean I've got an ad but it's like I
did it when we first started so the
quality is not great and we don't really
sort of say what it's about we just talk
so am I involved in that oh it's just I
just cut a clipped of it out of an

(01:52):
episode Oh you mean for us yeah oh right
I thought you were going to do an ad for
they they would give you they add we
would put there six people doing it and
you're sort of rotating and each month
each pod you put out you grab one of
their ads and put it in the middle of
yours and I've got some like
interstitial bits of Music which I don't

(02:13):
really have any use for but that would
be a really good use for them yeah
intercial yeah I don't know what that
word means it means like just a little
sting just a tiny little sting okay um
cuz when our Oliver our musical director
when he did our theme tune he also did a
couple little stings for us got it which

(02:34):
I've used a couple of times but we
mostly just kind of blather through
don't we um yeah well that sounds it's a
good idea so how so who are we are we
advertising someone
today no no we're recording an ad for
ourselves where I put I will put on the
thing for them to put in their own
episodes

(02:54):
right so you can hear the cogs in my
head but when are we I mean not that we
need to help other people but but does
someone not want to give us something to
put into something yeah yeah but that
doesn't happen today today well that
will happen when I edit it oh right you
got it to edit in this one right right
that's what I'm talking about yeah right

(03:14):
okay but we need we need to do a new ad
got it so how would you got it sell this
utter nonsense to prospective honestly I
wouldn't I just wouldn't just I'd say
there's probably something better out
there well I mean yeah there's something
else life's very short that's not in

(03:35):
question but
um yeah we need to think of something
I'll think of
[Music]
something Riz greetings gendered
language Ana Matas the ick what makes
some words sound funny why just listen
to music when you can overanalyze the

(03:55):
words and the songs music language and
Eurovision all crammed in into one
[Music]
podcast find us anywhere you listen to
[Music]

(04:17):
podcast yeah so what have we been doing
um we've been to see Tenacious D yes and
how was that do you want to give us your
honest
review well that makes it sound like I'm
going to say to him bad no um it was
really good yeah well of course it was
really good it was fantastic wasn't it
yeah yeah um yeah was exactly what you

(04:38):
would expect on one and um yeah it was
really good the um support Act was
really funny and really good and I Dave
Hill Dave Hill yeah he came because we
didn't know whether there was going to
be support and then he just came on on a
bike and then was toiling nunchucks
about and he was singing a song about
being a caveman in a spaceship which

(04:59):
I've had in my head ever since yeah is
it there anything on YouTube for him I
haven't looked followed I've followed
him on Instagram well go look the
internet is right in front of us okay
I'm staring at
it oh I can see all your history of what
you search for
dodgy I'll give you a a glimpse most of

(05:19):
it is either Disney or Star
Wars um and something by K
Bush Dave see if I if I type Dave Dave
hill I'll get guy from Slade wen't
I uh is that him uh that's him yeah see
my eyesight's not good enough to see his
face from where we were sitting we was

(05:39):
we weren't s s close no but I think it's
when you're seeing at the arena people's
faces are like just light aren't they
because the the spotlight so it's
um you I think you'd have to be pretty
close to see someone's facial features
from an arena would
you you'd have to be very close

(06:00):
I was in a fight a song that's a song
yeah I think um we could both appreciate
that just stupid for stupid sake and
it's a no that sounds like an insult
stupid for stupid sake I don't mean that
I mean it's just stupid well it's stupid
in the way Tenacious D is stupid it
really
fit it's more stupid than Tenacious D

(06:23):
that's that's I think that's the weird
thing they were
um I think because they've hone their
craft that they're you
know they can really play and really
sing and it's
like their um I just find a baby well in
my pocket I think I just remembered got

(06:43):
we start going on
walks um you know to get healthy even
though I feel like it's making me feel
worse um but I've decided to treat
myself and have walking cheese uh when
we go for walk so I'm finding normal um
vegan baby bells in my pockets and I
think I've got one in my bag that I need

(07:04):
to remember to take away and the wax you
can thoroughly recommend vegan baby Bell
yeah cuz they taste weird like um I mean
actually baby bells I never liked they I
don't think baby bells really taste a
much I don't think e really taste much
it's like plasticky cheese is it yeah
it's about the texture rather than
theast vegan baby bells taste like

(07:26):
um I don't know nice I mean hella
expensive an absolute ripoff well yeah
but you know walking cheese so little
little recommendation for you there
walking cheese cheese if you're going
walking just take some cheese I mean
you're you don't do it you refuse to do
walking cheese but I like my cheese on a
cracker it's a nice little addition you

(07:47):
know have a walk have some cheese
although I do finish it by I mean we've
not even turned the corner we can you
know smell our
house um but yeah and it's already gone
but you know I enjoy it while it's there
so shut
up uh is there anything else you want to
say about Tenacious D oh uh what was

(08:08):
your favorite
bit when they sang uh the
devil beab boss yeah that's the one
excellent excellent version of beab Boss
yeah um so what were your three favorite
Tenacious D songs you were telling me um
that the road

(08:32):
and was it Pick of
Destiny I I do like
that I also like low hanging through and
but then I also like the
Roadie
um know have you seen the video to the
Roadie yes it's like 10 minute yes
sketch I uh sent that to my boss did to

(08:54):
make a point that I feel like the
road yeah
um but yeah it's funny because you have
to stand in the stand in the wings of
marketing and never get any of the
spotlight yeah
exactly yeah I'm not I'm not the big

(09:14):
flashy person on stage
so that's fine though I think that's
where I belong I really liked this time
that they had the full band because last
time we saw them it was about 10 years
ago it was just the two of them playing
acoustic wasn't it it was a much smaller
venue though yeah but it was it's really
nice to have seen both you know both the

(09:36):
acoustic and the electric version of the
D isn't it yeah they were it was really
good yeah although you know when he said
um how many people saw Pick of Destiny
yeah and he said you didn't [ __ ] see
it in the cinemas I wanted to say I did
we did all right forget I exist

(10:01):
sh me out the way we could have both
said I did walk over me to get to them
that's hardly what I was thinking it's
what you just
did
um yeah no we did yeah and but
apparently people didn't I bet plenty of
people in that Arena went to see it
there were some young people though were

(10:22):
there yeah that girl in front of us who
was getting really excited she must have
been in her 20s yeah which is really
weird isn't it yeah cuz I forget how
long ago that first an aous D album came
out yeah why would someone in the 20s be
into them like J I don't understand
youth I'm not going to try cuz they they

(10:42):
all listen to All Sorts now don't they
nothing's nothing makes sense it's not
just chart music chart music it's not
um yeah I mean good on them but also
shut up with your youth flaunt it in my
face you know when he said is there any
gamers in yes I thought well I am but if

(11:06):
I ever identify as a gamer just just
punch me in the
face I'll happily punch you in the face
um you do associat a gamer I mean you're
streaming on Twitch or in one of those
stupid chairs that looks weird
but you know have neon in the background
but other than that but like there's not

(11:28):
that's not you play a lot I do anytime I
fall asleep on the sofa which is a
lot you play it bold as gate you play it
yeah
so but like calling yourself a gamer
there a that's got bad associations I
think
well gamer you just a I think you're

(11:48):
just a bit too old to be gamer yeah I
suppose so yeah you have to be I I play
computer games that's that's what you do
uh and Ro play games um um you know that
song video games that he does it
mentions Red Dead Redemption 2 right and
I wanted to say I know a guy who worked
on
that should have heckled that from the

(12:10):
audience when I finished Red Dead
Redemption too I wanted to send this guy
a bunch of hours or something I was so
grateful cuz it's such a good game right
yeah and you're not a
gamer such a geek all right all right do
you know how I said I got some [ __ ]
good content yeah yeah for today right I

(12:31):
mean if you want us to get to the
magazine sorry you know you know how we
roll by
now these things take time so I've got I
have in my hand Mega metal Kang number
10 okay right well that is a magazine
well it's not specifically about the
magazine I'm going to read you a a pen

(12:52):
pal letter so you remember I reached out
to some people yes and I had three
responses yes got another one to today
okay today you got today yeah so is that
lie or is that no no it's true today
like literally just before I finished
work at an email oh really yeah so and
it's an amazing letter so I'm going to

(13:14):
read this hi there who wants to help me
send me all your bonjie de leopard and
Cinderella articles SL pictures and I'll
send you info on your favorite bands I
would also like palen Pals male or
female 14 plus from the USA you like the
above bands plus crew AOS Smith heart
Zeppelin poison Etc John bonji

(13:35):
lookalikes welcome if female you must be
madly in love with John bonjovi WR to
Lisa Ventura Worster
right
so let's find my email okay it's
exciting I mean I got a Facebook message
and an email but I think I largely said

(13:56):
the same thing so and and I sent I sent
these messages like I know February or
something so message thank you so much
for your Facebook message I'm so sorry I
didn't spot it until last night it
landed in my message request spam folder
which I confess I rarely check but I
will now on I am in I am indeed leas AV
venturer who put an ad in Kang magazine

(14:19):
back in 1988 it's so hard to believe
that back then there was no email or
Internet or mobile phones and the
landline telephone and writing letters
were the two ways of keeping in touch
with
people had quite a few pen pals as a
result of my ad two which I'm still in
touch with today one has become one of
my best friends her Facebook is here a

(14:40):
just a few weeks ago we were talking
about kran contacts and how we met
through writing letters to each other
when she responded to my ad we used to
love Kang writing letters to each other
and talking about how much we love heavy
metal we lost touch for a little bit we
reconnected again in
2007 uh and we've been very close
friends ever since so much so that she
attended an investure ceremony at winter

(15:02):
castle with me when I was awarding an
MBE for services to cyber security and
diversity inclusion what it gets it gets
better it turns out that we are both
neuro Divergent diagnosed with autism
and ADHD but much later in our lives I
was 44 when I was diagnosed with autism

(15:22):
and 49 when I was diagnosed with ADHD on
top of that being pimp paled through
Karan contacts helped helped us both
massively in terms of the isolation we
felt from our peers because of being
autistic and having ADHD though neither
of us knew why we felt that way at the
time I struggled socially so having the
outlet of writing letters and having pen

(15:43):
pals was a godsend today I've built up a
huge Network on social media um through
my work in the cyber security industry
and I love building inclusive
communities I am still just as much into
heavy metal and bonjo V AOS Smith and
tons of other rock bands
as I was back when I placed the ad and
I've seen many of them live over the

(16:03):
years uh if you would like me to share
more please let me know Fiona and I
would love to be guests on CIP with
Madness if you will have us I'm a
regular podcast host and interviewer and
have taken part in many podcasts um
about cyber security and neurodiversity
and diversity and inclusion so I know

(16:23):
the drill what's involved probably all
that apart from cyber security because I
would have literally
UT uh a final thing this might be really
cheeky but if you have a copy of the pen
palad I would love to have a screenshot
um I've tried both Fiona and myself have
tried to locate it but to no avail um so
I had a look through and I couldn't find

(16:45):
it in Karan contacts but it was it was
actually in that Mega metal right when I
was I was desperate for people to like
because I was just getting nothing from
the people I wrote to um so I wrote back
to
uh side
note does she know that you're going to

(17:05):
read out the letter yes she said she
said feel free to share anything okay uh
here's the magazine in full blah blah
blah blah blah
um and yeah no I I sent a Coran contacts
as a PDF but she's not in that um so
she's also said

(17:29):
oh yeah I couldn't spot you in there
blah blah blah and cut all this um so I
said we haven't had any guests on so far
we're just getting into the whole
podcasting thing but I definitely want
to expand in the future it would be
great to have some readers from back in
the day either on G B with bandas or
another podcast we've got in development
I was going to say you're going to talk
about that so I'll definitely be in

(17:49):
touch um yeah they'd be good on that and
then I took a picture of the thing and
sent it over to her
um I'm so chuffed to have this thank you
a she said uh and she said um you're
more than welcome to share anything I
give you on the podcast so it's fine
that I read all that out but how

(18:10):
brilliant is that really brilliant yeah
pause for Thought share anything on the
podcast so she can we can share what she
said
yeah that is very nice yeah that's the
sort of wholesome message I want really
nice yeah a yeah no I always thought
like well this podcast is just you you

(18:32):
and me having a conversation I don't
know whether conversations are stretch
but yeah well you know I talk at you you
talk at me you know me going really a
the cats yell at us you know started it
but yeah I develop it you know I totally
because she want and that um Joanne that
wrote to us a while back she to about

(18:52):
guess is that I'm immature and I don't
know how to sort to people other than
you yeah
and you know speaking to humans worries
me but you do that all the time you used
to interview people for work I know but
I don't think I was very good here yeah
but you did
it right refer back to my the statement

(19:14):
I don't think I was very good at it um I
sing in the car I'm not very good at it
I'm pretty good and I also wonder
whether any of these people have
actually listened because if they you
know I imagine this podcast is not
everyone don't let her listen to before
she agrees to be on it you know one of
the you can't cuz we we find what
happens is that oh you get all in your

(19:36):
head about it so just don't definitely
don't listen to us um talking about
stuff before you come on because then
you'll definitely say
no um that's really nice yeah oh lovely
wholesome lovely that is wholesome as

(19:57):
[ __ ] um
yeah so and I mean I mean suppose we're
going to do it
soon but are you going to speak about
well possible Adventure in in in vague
details for now yeah it was your idea so
you my idea pitch it well actually I

(20:17):
don't know because what if people steal
steal the idea because it's well who
cares I care but like I think there's
other there's other people doing this
kind of stuff there's there's no
original ideas right there's 17 podcast
scaredy cats and you
can't you know stop people from calling
their podcast Scaredy Cats true okay

(20:40):
well some people get very angry about
Scaredy Cats we
were um going to do a a separate podcast
speaking to guests who have a passion
for something so that passion can be
about anything but it has to be a
passion that's the
stipulation you don't just do it and
call it a

(21:00):
passion side
eye
um yeah so
um that's it really we've don't want to
give too much away this we've got a few
people in mind well we've got two guests
confirmed and said they're looking
forward to it yeah we've got some some
of our friends that we haven't asked but

(21:21):
we think probably do it maybe if we
really
really yeah we really haven't asked them
yeah I need to ask that person I need to
ask that person but we do have two
external people yeah um and these are
people who you know how you go through
life and you randomly um that was meant

(21:43):
to say randomly I don't know what came
out my mouth then randomly it's hard to
say um meet people in life but some PE
like you can have really brief
interactions with people so like five
minutes in your entire life and
something about that 5 minutes leaves an
impression on you and that impression is

(22:04):
normally because they there's something
they're like they're passionate about
something or yeah it's probably because
they're passionate about something
because if you were passionate about
something you won't really remember it
um but this has happened notably twice
for me so that's what the two people who
instantly popped into my head um and
I've asked both of those people and they
both have agreed to it and seem excited

(22:24):
about I can only remember one uh which
one the Prince guy okay well the um
comic oh yeah yeah yeah yeah so um well
we'll keep we'll keep it close to our
chest yes but it'll be good because it's
basically going to be listening to
people talk very passionately about
something that they're passionate about

(22:45):
and you know that it doesn't matter
whether that topic is something that you
would ever personally be interested in
but someone who has a gen like we're
talking genuine passion so when you're
talking to someone and you and it's
their Soul talking to you that is what
we're looking for yeah because then
that's like that's cool no matter what
it they're talking about you know let's

(23:06):
not don't want to be awful but but so
this podcast is it's going to be us
interviewing these people but we're
basically just going to let them talking
it's not going to be our nonsense which
is what this we're going to say we're
going to save our nonsense for this I'm
going to be professional I'm going to
have questions but not loads of
questions and I'm going to try not to

(23:28):
give my my um
opinions oh well yeah that's important
because um it's not it's not going to be
it's not about
us is about what they're passionate
about so yeah anyway don't steal the
idea you [ __ ] TOS um I think F cotton
does something similar [ __ ]
off right actually she's got a cat I

(23:50):
can't get mad she's put up a Instagram
video her in a cat before so oh have to
like her
whatever I hate girls like that who are
sort ofish my age and look really young
and chendy it's like whatever sit my
chuit bottoms and
my achy joints and my walking cheese and

(24:10):
you know whatever I mean this this
episode is definitely going to be called
Walking cheese walking cheese yeah do it
honestly and it could be any cheese I
mean you know hash let's keep it vegan
but you know you can get nice vegan
cheese Cathedral City vegan cheese is
weird when you first have it it's Crum
way more crumbly than normal Cathedral

(24:30):
City get over that but once you've had
it you get cravings for it I swear to
God V life is you love viol like the the
spreadable what what do they call it
cream cheese have you stopped buying
that because you got too obsessed of it
because not bought any in in a limited
yourself I could just Chow Down on a
whole tub of that in one go that's and I

(24:53):
never I never like cream cheese that
much content um yeah pop and ice down on
my life you could do an for yeah that's
that's for that's for my only fans um oh
my God will people pay only fans to
watch you eat VI life there's a lot of
weird people I would be happy for you to
do that women can watch you do that and

(25:13):
I don't care what Joy they get out of it
there's literally no woman on the planet
it's going to be some weird guy isn't it
who care if that weird guy's going to
pay us I don't care he can watch you and
do whatever he wants all right smear
himself with v life as he's watching you
oh are VI life going to sue us no we're
saying we enjoy it it's nice uh if
you're listening your VI life please

(25:34):
sponsor us that be I mean that' be your
dream can baby Bell vegan the Greek
white block whever they call it that's
really nice is it yeah can't remember
what that you're just you're just stuck
on your Cathedral City and your I'm
obsessed with that Cathedral City
craving baby Bell
yeah so right so that's cheese covered

(25:57):
yeah okay this is this is your One-Stop
shop for uh vegan cheese opinions
honestly because yeah everyone knows
when you first have it vegan cheese is
like you're like this is [ __ ] I'll never
be happy again but then you get over
that in about a day I don't think with
the cathedral city it was you do not
miss normal cheese like I I really don't

(26:19):
and I used to eat cheese didn't I cheese
was my thing you used to be of a cheese
fiend yeah and
um now mate give me Cathedral City
plant-base any day any day I mean it's
bit crumbly but you know it's super
crumbly yeah that's the downside you
know Cel they worst things

(26:40):
cegan speak of the devil cats have
started meowing again okay let's so
you're actually going to look at the
magazine now actually going to look at
some
[Music]
karang
the you out where to see your I want
your opinion and description of this

(27:04):
cover of cang hold on I'm not looking uh
something
sexy an
80s oh
um um I mean open my eyes
and neither one of those two
descriptions are accurate but it looks

(27:26):
more
40s
and
uh you
know I'm no all painting so I can hardly
sit here being like you're not
good-looking but it's Phil Collins so
when I said sexy um it's Phil Collins
you make your own mind up if you like

(27:47):
that magic let's just find out how old
Phil Collins was in 1980 in February
March 1984 20 years younger than me
probably
I mean he didn't look old he just looks
like Phil Collins Phil Collins has
always had that look he's he's never I
don't know he looked pretty cool in uh

(28:08):
no no finish don't bother finishing
sentence that no like if you see if you
see Genesis live at the batter clan in
1973 he looks cool as [ __ ] no like T
tons of hair tons of hair not much on
his head not on his head

(28:28):
not on his head well he had a bit of
hair on his head oh that's what we want
nice hairy
back so anyway yeah we've got um off to
him karang number 62 God love him apart
from the whole facts in his wife
thing I think in his autobiography he

(28:50):
says he didn't do that did
he he says a lot of stuff and then he
made that song What were was it in ible
touch saying's really toxic I think he
fxs his wife after what's what's that
song though is that the one I'm saying
is that yeah yeah when it's like oh get
over yourself well do you know what

(29:11):
right before we get a bad it's an banger
but before we get into
karang like longterm list wait how old
is
he oh my God I thought you lost interest
right he's 73 now I was going to say
he's not 73 there you idiot he's about
12 right how long ago is 1984

(29:32):
19 40 Years Years about 20 years ago so
he was 33 shut up oh my God imagine you
at work that guy comes in and he's like
I'm 33 you be like [ __ ]
off why you pretending like why you
being a creep why are you saying you're
33 when you're obviously 66 I mean that

(29:54):
coat looks warm though doesn't it
doesn't that look like a really good
quality
coat well it was probably W
mate um and he's got a he's got a nice
scarf and a and a
hat what you need on the front of Kang I
think he was wearing a flat cap a lot in
this era but yeah I think this is the

(30:15):
most ridiculous Kang cover we've had
isn't
it yeah I don't I don't normally have a
guy with big hair playing guitar or or a
sexy lady
yeah you don't get a stubbly grumpy
looking man in a flat carp Ander you

(30:36):
know warm over he don't even look that
grumpy he just looks a bit cheesed off
SM like like he's gone down to the
corner shop to get a
um finger
fudge and he's like they didn't have any
fingers of fudge left and he's like like
he knows it's not the end of the world

(30:57):
but he's just a bit like you had to get
a Kit Kat I had my heart set on that
and but he it wasn't like he just really
wanted he just thought I might get a
finger fudge and it was just more
fleeting thing and then he was just like
oh so it's more that level of
disappointment I was going to say can
you still get a finger fudge but you
bloody well could in 1984 exactly right

(31:18):
in February 23 do you think there's some
way we could reach out to Phil Collins
and find out whether he likes finger or
kick what he obviously does that's seems
more like a child's no he just fancied
he just fancied it it was like 10p he
wasn't starving but he just fancied
something sweet that just wasn't like
tons of stuff you know and he thought

(31:40):
well Bob on I'll get to the uh Corner
Shop they'll have it went to each wasn't
there so just was like that's
disappointing I'm not going to let ruin
my day but it's
disappointing and that's the face he's
pulling and if you question that look at
his face listen to my narrative and

(32:01):
you'd be like yeah you're
right
right long-term listeners speaking of
nothing to do with that toys us is
coming back to the High Street I didn't
know it gone
away for God
Jeffrey um Jeffrey and

(32:22):
helpers
um I don't know what to say about that
just be happy Revelation that Toys R Us
is why did did Toys R Us go away for a
reason yeah because no one buys from the
high Sho anymore right but they they
said yeah I don't I mean I think they're
going to come back fleetingly because

(32:43):
people do not buy on the High Street
anymore like so it's God bless them but
it's not going to last long but when
they said a Shop's coming back I was I
was desperate for it to be
wwor wwor was [ __ ] amazing I remember
I used to go into Walworth and like
you'd be able to get cheap Christmas
decorations amazing and I once got a um

(33:06):
four cassettes you could mix and match
any of their four cassettes and um it
was near Christmas time obviously so I
bought I was buying like four Christmas
cassettes and one of them was A Whiter
and I didn't know what A Whiter was um I
just thought well it's Christmas is it
so it'll be good but I didn't know what
A Whiter was and if you know what A
Whiter is it's

(33:28):
that and Christmas are the worst
combination you can ever if you just
awful so um and like you couldn't
actually do you know what I don't I
think I might have taken it back because
it was that bad it was the worst thing
that
I ever ever had and it was like four
tapes for tenna or

(33:49):
something um
but you're on your Christmas playlist oh
brilliant well we talk talk about your
WHL tape on one of our Christmas
episodes this is one of those things
where I've mentioned it and you're like
all right Grandma you've told us about
this and I'm like have
I yeah but we had we had three Christmas

(34:10):
episodes so I don't know which which of
the Christmas episodes it was like this
year
Christ um oh [ __ ] that's creepy um but
yeah so well not everyone listens to
everything we say and I don't so
um no warw I mean oh that warw Christmas

(34:31):
adver I listen to on a loop Adventure
call Brilliant
um yeah could have sworn I put a whirl
it so maybe you took it off because it's
awful and no one wants to listen to it
it's the worst thing ever it's not
Christmasy it's not Seas sidey I mean

(34:53):
maybe if you grew up in
Whitby um
it would mean something to you but
growing up without WHL it's say I
mean I'm just surprised I didn't know
what a whirl it's was but I think there
was even a picture of it on the front of
the cassette but you you just don't know
what it is maybe I thought it's like an

(35:14):
organ an organ's a Christmasy like
normal it is a an kind of an organ isn't
it well it's or so I guess so but it
doesn't sound like an organ it sounds
like chis it sounds like you're at the
seaside
yeah it that's
it well I can't find
it um I just saw tin Turner weren't we

(35:37):
going to talk about something that we
watched well I've got some Tina Turner
content coming up okay but I thought
we'd talk we had talked separately and
said oh we should mention that we'd
watch that forgotten well I mean do you
want to talk about it now no I don't
care I just I don't really know what
we're talking about anymore but I just I

(35:57):
mean who knows ask me again in 5 minutes
and we'll have the same conversation we
talking about world which we've we've if
good luck for the next 40 years of
dealing super cuz I'm not going to get
any better this isn't going to get
better but like all I'm not even trying
to forget all this [ __ ] we would have
recorded it in December that's ages ago
it's not that long

(36:20):
ago see this actually this isn't as bad
as
some because this could be like a music
box couldn't it
yeah sounds all right that that doesn't
sound too bad but if you're at a German
Market you like like to hear that the
ones that were more like well I don't
like to be beside the Seas side you know

(36:41):
like that proper like that but
Christmasy but I think the the point is
when you don't know what a whit is and
you put a tape on and you obviously like
we mentioned before you invested you
know this wasn't the days when you could
piss away money although I did piss away
money but um for tapes is you know 25%

(37:06):
of your purchase and you put it in
you're like for [ __ ] sake that's what
right okay well now I know what a world
it to is [ __ ] my life um it's
disappointing but not as disappointing
or more disappointing than the fudge
incident from
earlier speaking back toil getting back
on to fil right so long-term listeners

(37:28):
will know that last episode and the one
before we were talking about Q from 1992
right and one thing that I had marked
out to talk about but I we didn't get
round to was the video review section
and there's a review
of what the what the video review
section the what the Vio yeah review

(37:52):
section I'll have to put you have that
VI
on the playlist so Phil Collins but
seriously videos right and I wanted to
read this out to you because it
basically Echoes something that you said
right Phil Collins has said no no no no
the you you human being no I understand

(38:13):
that [ __ ] listen what are you
reading oh my God what are you reading
though I'm reading a review of Phil
Collins but seriously the a review of
Phil Collins that's all you had to say
yeah Jesus yeah that's what I did say
right so from the middle of the review
yes um something about
fudge as for the misery while someone's

(38:35):
got to do it in songs like all of my
life do you remember and something
happened on the way to heaven Collins
writes about a world where relationships
are doomed men are always unfairly
having to take the blame and where women
nearly always lie hardly very right on
but obviously comes straight from the
heart and his one man repost to the
guardian women's page obviously strikes

(38:56):
a few familiar cords with millions of
record buyers now literally the other
day you were telling me that you thought
invisible touch was very toxic yeah cuz
it is you listen to it you're like oh
God all right yeah yeah yeah it's all
her fault is it yeah yeah it's her fault
is it it's definitely her fault MH can't
be yours you look at yourself in the

(39:19):
[ __ ] mirror Phil I mean if if you
read his autobiography it was mostly his
[ __ ] fault
right but even
so I'm just saying
that you know yeah you can hide it in a
banger it's all pop and fun but come on

(39:40):
come
on well come on we're talking about um
Genesis in
1984 rather than I think invisible
Church came out in ' 86 so this is a bit
before that um so on the cover of Kang
we've got Genesis alien culture we've
got Shai spider great white John Cougar

(40:02):
Rock goddess wendyo Williams Rick
Bromfield and John Sykes
lovely so in Mayhem this week we've got
a really good picture lovely picture of
status quo and it said uh they undertake
another major British Europe they know
that photo been
taken well yeah look they're giving it

(40:23):
the me Moody and magn who who is all of
them that guy
is he I think he always looked like that
is he yeah he knew it was being taken
did he yeah he looks like he's smiling
at his mom like his mom's gone put your
nice smile on he looks bit like um Kevin
from cornation Street I mean there's a h

(40:44):
modern reference for today's kids he
also looks like all commercialized he
does yeah
yeah Chris need
[Music]
him um so chart music I you must listen
to something that says chart music about
19 times a day cuz well when I'm at home
with you that's all I hear the the
podcast chart

(41:05):
music oh is that what it's called yeah
pleas playe that so you never told me
anything I don't know I'm sure I've told
you that you hav't maybe you have
actually yeah good point you might told
me five minutes about yeah
maybe andah would wait
what so the the article is called call

(41:27):
it quit uh oh um status quo undertake
another major British European tour from
April July and these shows will Mark the
band's farewell appearance as a live act
I mean some tight some tight jeans
armadillo of the month tight jeans
[Music]
action well I mean you know if you're in

(41:49):
status quo the quo I thought they wore
like denim on denim he's got a leather
jacket on them uh I don't think I
thought it was always denim on Den on
denim on denim I don't think they've
crystallized the look yet right okay so
this this was interesting to me because
when I was at school some of my friends
went to see status quo and it was a long

(42:10):
bloody time after 1984 so they clearly
didn't call it quit and I looked this up
basically like these two so is that the
guy that goes with him at the that's
Rick pit and Francis Rossy in the middle
he can they like him and that's all you
need to worry about
because they didn't call it quit is a

(42:32):
live act they just basically were sick
of each other and the band sort of split
up then these two
formed another band that were also sort
of called status quo leaving the others
in a Lurch and just went on for another
you know but maybe because of this photo
do you think and they thought come on

(42:53):
come on and neither here nor there so
we're going to go with
the the
two actually I think this guy on the end
the keybo player he um I think
he remained in the band but the other
two right but you don't know his name
got the well no is Andy bound I you know

(43:14):
I I don't know you know the history of
status quo but in it mad that like
they'd been going about 20 years at this
point and obviously they thought well
that's a long time you know we need to
call it quits and then or maybe maybe it
was cuz they played at live a didn't
they like a year after this they played
at live a and then everyone was

(43:37):
interested again so they thought so what
hits did they have when they were these
lot um I know rocking all over the world
right okay um
Caroline down down and that was with all
of them I think so right okay but they
just split and then kept all those songs
they yeah they kept going and did

(43:57):
some stuff that
wasn't right that good we used to we
used to make fun of the you [ __ ] kids
who like status quo cuz they seemed a
bit showers yet they didn't seem like a
proper rock band they just seem like I
make fun of kids who like status quo too
you know probably hang out with Jim
Davidson you know they they do sort of

(44:19):
make me cringe now yeah you've got
you've got a real status quo I do Haven
you only because I just feel like
anytime you hear them talk they're like
oh we're crazy rockers we take loads of
drugs and it's like oh God if you have
to keep saying it I'm going to start to
think that you may be just saying it

(44:41):
like it just feels a bit too um
forced do know what I mean and some of
the songs all right but well some of
some of them great you know rocking all
over the world I mean they didn't write
it it's cover
great come on you like you You' nod your

(45:03):
head you do that dance where you put
your I would I would not the thumbs the
bell I would not do that how dare you
how dare
you dare you few shandies dare do some
walking cheese it makes me cringe
thinking about it if I was out somewhere

(45:25):
and they played it I would cringe
oh I mean it's Dad rocking it but dads
need Rock too yeah but they can have
nickel back or whatever
now um well I found the video to the end
of the road tour I've put it on the
playlist so you can watch the whole
concert oh thank
God uh so moving

(45:47):
on what else we
got uh Rog Do's got a single out nice um
what's your feelings about Rog doter in
The Who
um like CSI
do do has no plans at present to tour
and as far as the who's position is

(46:08):
concerned the vocalist has stated that
quote if you can believe what Pete
Townsen says then it's over so and I
think they're on tour this year right so
but he thought they'd knocked it on head
in 84 so everyone's on tour and
everyone's over you um like a certain
song that he did for a certain movie
though don't you

(46:29):
a certain cover version of a certain
Elton John classic in a certain vampire
movie from a certain 987
chist
Christ um yeah okay yeah I mean maybe
the and gentlemen Mr Elon

(46:51):
[Music]
John so there's an article about spy are
you aware of spider
spider
spider uh well you got to explain that I
don't really know is it one of our
nephews yeah doesn't he didn't he once

(47:11):
say but I think they they we have some
nephews who were like children about 900
years ago and they obviously
occasionally say some words a bit funny
and we latch on to that and then only
ever use those words in a funny way
going forward so we've got wizard in our
garden and
um he saw it and he went is it is it and

(47:35):
um then he went not scary cuz he was
obviously terrified by it and he's
trying to convince himself that he
wasn't scared but he clearly was by this
um resin wizard um but you went is it uh
so we always say is it not scary um so
yeah and spider who said that I think

(47:56):
you same same one I think so or maybe
it's just the way he said wizard he's
not cogne so I don't know why it's
coming out cogne but
uh so it's just one of those things that
you you pick up from kids cuz they say
things in a funny way can't talk
properly but like say it
once slightly weird and we like not

(48:18):
rinse him to the face but we make we
make it like well that's all you can say
for it was in before he could really
talk properly you know I mean you can
have a conversation with him now but
like yeah back then it was just he's 43
now
so okay spider major corporation um yeah

(48:43):
so I think spider
Noam um so this this time the band of
decided to record what can only be
described as concept album the title
rough Justice referred to the hardtime
heavy metal fans gets from the media
indeed the lp opens up with a pompous
judge sentencing the band to death for
playing heavy metal oh

(49:04):
dear one there he's got nice blows
[Music]
on he said he says it's actually
happening big brother the media is Big
Brother right the media that he's
publicizing himself in right now also
the single here we go rock and roll is a
dig at the radio stations and the people
in the media who create Fashions and say

(49:27):
this band is hip this year or this week
and this band isn't hip
anymore uh and people have taken a piss
out of the fact they use the words rock
and roll in so many of their song titles
uh we'll keep writing songs about rock
and roll until people stop moaning about
it so that's not not a

(49:47):
very uh Progressive attitude to take is
it you just basically trying to piss
people off um but should we have a bit
of spider yeah
[Music]

(50:08):
oh
baby this worse quality than
[Music]
that I mean does that it feels like it's
someone pressing play record the same
time on a tape recorder in the same Hall
Scout Hall as uh
these guys playing without any plugged

(50:30):
in instruments but other than that
sounds good well I think that's part of
it but also my speakers are I do oh yeah
I mean yeah I don't think it's
like you know that [ __ ] it's it's not
like um don't feel like the
logo the logo is good well do you want
to describe the logo spider it's sort of

(50:52):
metal it's a spider on the word spider
it's got
fangs and red eyes and it's made of
metal and
weirdly you can really
see six of its
legs whereas obviously we all know that

(51:12):
the key point about spiders is their
eight legs so it seems weird like I
think the other two legs are under the p
and the e but then it feels a bit
like the whole thing about out spiders
is their eight
legs so to really really maximize their

(51:33):
six
legs I mean are these that's I mean I
think yeah I think that's a leg and
that's a leg with feet or something yeah
um but it just seems like a weird Choice
it I think I think the sort of chrome
rendering of it makes it a little bit
difficult to it's I mean it's [ __ ]
good for the time I couldn't make that

(51:56):
now bit of airbrush that I reckon I
couldn't do that could you make that
logo now was that good in in Photoshop I
could yeah piss off in first shop you do
it you know yeah some people can who do
you think you are you can do that
now right the next right right right do

(52:18):
it right do it so do it right the next
can IOD with Mattis logo is going to
look like that it's going to have a six
spider on it
yeah and you're going to eat your words
I bet do because do you about 5 minutes
from 84 84 look at
that look at it I couldn't have done it

(52:39):
in 84 paint was we were like mad on
paint in the early
2000s
paint and look at that yeah but
someone's actually done that with an
airbrush there was no digital art back
in right theer days they have what do
you mean they've done it with an

(52:59):
airbrush what do you mean on each
record no so they've done it with an
airbrush but it's still like clever it
looks
like
[Laughter]
what I'm just saying I mean this is what
what's made this podcast such a

(53:22):
hit I mean I'm just saying it's good for
the time
but what about the music does it sound a
bit status quo to
you I just realized is it the album's
called rough Justice it always like the
song that's the album The album's called
rough
[Applause]

(53:46):
Justice [ __ ] off this is not like States
quo States quo wishes they were like
this this is what stage want to be when
they're going on like oh aren't we rock
and roll oh we take drugs yeah you would
get it you want to be spider but you're
not
so

(54:10):
um I think qu definitely influen [ __ ]
off no
way in the same way that they're
influenced by
me all
right should we talk about something
else um Easy Action do you remember Easy

(54:31):
Action yeah no they got a song called We
we go rocking do you remember that song
uh play
it that's a person in a Ghillie
[Music]
[Applause]

(54:53):
suit this video looks familiar have we
looked this before yeah a long time ago
though hey look I remember
something it's bit bad
news it's pretty
good oh it's
Ace especially the
corus Okay this world got to pay

(55:17):
attention King tonight
Ro okay yeah got it oh all right okay
yeah yeah
yeah yeah good chorus Lads really

(55:37):
original not heard that before
um ballsy up temper
rockers with a lot of glitter and very
little soul oh
well you know not not a glowing review
but you know it was all right

(55:58):
Right Moving
on oh come on honey I wasn't that bad
right so well
communication well yeah Verity on tour
with Saxon this
year um I should find some Verity and
put that on the playlist haven't done

(56:19):
that um i' just like to take this
opportunity to say a big thank you to
White Snake guitarist Mel
for taking the trouble to get me
backstage passes for Castle Donington
because I come from the same town he
does Mel also gave me his own personal
pass so I could get in to see the band
at the Newberg Festival last year I
mention both facts now because it seems

(56:41):
that wh snake have had a lot of
criticism recently for supposingly
having no time for Ordinary People well
for my contact with Mel I'd say all this
dog is at to
laon a I mean there seems like there's
more to that story he's not doing that
for everyone is he
[Music]
no because he's not giving everyone
backstage passes but it's a nice thing

(57:03):
to do all right here's here's a good
letter for you yeah isn't it about time
Kuran gave some coverage to some of the
great bands from the past such as the
doors Santana and even Pink Floyd do you
realize that the average karang reader
probably knows everything there is to
know about modern quote bands like mly
crew Aussie Osborne Venom and Merciful
Fate why is mly crew not a band such

(57:26):
things yet such things as the origin of
for example Santana Jimmy Page's guitar
style Jim Morrison's vocal nuances and
Roger waters's inspirational
songwriting remain a virtual mystery for
them it's becoming painfully obvious
that all you care about promoting those
Macho stars who PS about in leather and

(57:46):
Chains music seems irrelevant to Kang
that's from Nancy Wilson
devote heart devote yeah
um why why is mly crew not a band um
this this person doesn't like mly crew
or the Osborne of any more Merciful Fate
and thinks karang should just be about

(58:07):
bands from the 60s and 70s
banned
bands well he thinks they just P out in
leather and
chains I mean they sort of do for some
of it but still a band and the Stars I'd
argue that stars is WR like that I think

(58:28):
um Nancy Wilson heart
devote uh really is just a way of a c to
be invented and is reading the wrong
magazine because you're not going to get
that from karang are you in in the mid
880s P Xavier Russell Dante brento and
Malcolm Dome know as much about rock as
my unborn brother who are they they're

(58:51):
all writers for Kang wow
Crums I mean this person's got a bit of
a problem haven't they they
are hey check it out spider spider
spider on
tour have we missed it yeah oh [ __ ] so
in Rocky USA they're talking about the

(59:13):
American Music Awards
um top group Top live group Top album
Top album cover and second best tour of
the year was how de Leopard fared with
Jo Elliot being voted best male singer
and sex object of the Year tring sting
Boy George Pat benitar and Dave Roth in

(59:34):
US Rock mag creams annual readers
poll Billy Idol was voted Punk of the
year I think that's fair I mean I I find
it funny that they've got a punk of the
Year award you punk maybe it's said like
that um you don't
punk maybe it's is that time the flashy

(59:57):
news magazine decreed that Ronald Reagan
and and dropof rip would jointly share
its Man of the Year award a Brazilian
gentleman wrote in to disagree David Le
Roth lead singer with the rock band Van
Halen should get get it he reckoned a
man who in a time of Crisis and World
tension brings Joy to the hearts of
millions of young

(01:00:19):
people um do you think David Lee Roth
was Man of the Year in 1984 because he's
bought Joyce a million
um my memory of 84 is hazy but I'd say
yeah probably
yeah I mean 84 was when the the 1984
with jump on came came out so 100%

(01:00:42):
you're not going to get better than that
are you no is advert for too close to
the ground by status quo it's not a very
good advert
um it's awful actually looks a bit like
Alice Cooper doesn't it it's a cartoon
if you can call it
that
it's it yeah you not a fan

(01:01:05):
no no oh no do you know what I think his
guitar is so heavy that he's too close
to the ground he's having to do the
splits to play it got it it's a concept
and it's in black and white and blue
because the blue is their jeans of
course cuz denim denim yeah that's what

(01:01:27):
I saying
denim denim um on tour with rock goddess
okay um looks like a nice hotel
room Brown on Brown on Brown well
everything was Brown in the early
curtains look scroll

(01:01:48):
up
oh the carpet the walls the bed covers
in a hotel and the headboard the bed
covers in a hotel were
Brown think about that for 5 seconds
imagine getting into a hotel room and
the bed covers of brown imagine that do
you think they all shared the same

(01:02:09):
room um probably so it's brown walls
brown carpet brown bed covers Brown
headboard beige
foam oh
my there were other colors though in the
70s weren't there yeah yeah but it's
just easier to do brown I think yes

(01:02:31):
sir well they look like fun girls anyway
don't they feeding a dog and ice cream
or milkshake or something like that
looks nice she's looking pretty cool in
the shiny trousers yeah rocking out
meeting the fans right a lovely Ross
Halen picture of Aussie Osborne mle crew
and

(01:02:51):
wasted they're all hanging out together
so do you think this was the tour
where you know Aussie was pissing on the
floor it looks like the right look the
right ear isn't it yeah snorting
ants supposedly oh do you know
what

(01:03:13):
like spiders in the night is that what
you're going to play no no I was going
to play
this when we were on tour with Aussie um
we'd always have these crazy parties
backstage and I'm like dude let's just
go to the [ __ ] room just chill out
come on and the [ __ ] Ro in the

(01:03:33):
[ __ ] and he's just going like I'm
like dude please I just [ __ ] grab him
like come on take him to the elevator I
find his room put the key in I'm like
okay bud I like pushed the door I'm like
okay bud you're in your room okay bye
he's like no [ __ ] come in B and I'm
like oh [ __ ] I almost got out of here
and he pulls me into his room pulls his

(01:03:54):
pants down and just shits on the [ __ ]
floor a [ __ ] big [ __ ] on the floor
and I'm
like I'm like okay dude I gotta go no
[ __ ] and he [ __ ] drags me back in
and now he picks up the [ __ ] and he's
got in his hands and he's just smearing
it all over the walls of his [ __ ]

(01:04:16):
hotel room I'm like dude I got to go
this is [ __ ] up and I just I I just I
remember turning around and and I just I
saw his his back and he was just
painting with his [ __ ] on the walls and
I just [ __ ] was like now's my chance
and I [ __ ] pinned it out of there
dude I was like this is on some other
Next Level [ __ ] like I'm not really

(01:04:36):
ready to compete at this level I'm cool
with you know taking a [ __ ] in the
toilet if Tommy Lee is saying that
something's too
much then that's quite something isn't
it I can I can tell your shocks I didn't
lie that yeah well I don't like poo

(01:05:00):
stor um I'm going to pretend that wasn't
true and that didn't
happen so that's they they didn't show
that in the dirt I thank God can you
imagine oh I could start G because I
feel like I'm I'm not too far away from
gipping now
so uh all right yeah should we talk

(01:05:22):
about something
else um latest Bob Seager single on
Capital oldtime rock and roll has been
used on the soundtrack to a movie called
Risky Business which is just
opened and that's like all anyone knows
about that song now is that film isn't
it that's the about that film is that

(01:05:44):
bit yeah have you never seen it uh
no weirdly yeah don't need seen that bit
yeah I guess so yeah it's pretty good
good I I watched it many many years ago
and I thought it was quite rude because
I was I was quite Young when I saw

(01:06:05):
ity he's a bit cheeky yeah I think he's
you have lady friends he's he's got my
my my memory of it is he's got rich
parents but they go away and he has a
wild party and he he hires like a high
class cor girl and she comes around and
he gets into some shenan is The Whisky
business yeah that was the risky

(01:06:26):
business yes Rebecca
deor why have I never seen it uh it
seems like the sort of thing you would
have
watched yeah
weird okay so we okay we've come to the
halfway point in the magazine and we're
going to uh leave you for another week

(01:06:47):
leave you high and dry but uh we'll be
back next time to uh pick up on this
fantastic so do you tell people that
there is also a playlist for the songs
that you cover in YouTube that they can
go and listen to and doesn't have to be
listening to our voice but it can be
listening to the songs that we cover
absolutely well you just did okay but do
you do you tell people that okay do you

(01:07:09):
yeah do you really Yeah you sort of do a
bit but you don't really explain it well
there's a
playlist that all the songs we talk
about but some people might not use
playlists in YouTube um so you went on
to so how no you misunderstood some
people might not know about playlists so
how would one find your playlist on

(01:07:30):
YouTube well if you go to that's a good
question if you on um Instagram I always
put a story with link on but if you go
to our link tree which is all of our
links where would they find the link
tree uh
it's link tree slod with Madness pod
with Madness yeah you've got links to

(01:07:53):
Instagram YouTube Twitter Twitter uh
whatever that is Apple Spotify email
Facebook but what about playlist which
is what we're talking about um well that
will take you to the playlist the
YouTube button but also I've got a link
to the YouTube playlist in the socials
section so yeah you just go to go to

(01:08:14):
link tree but where do people listen to
it on YouTube do you put the actual
podcast on YouTube I well I put the
podcast on YouTube but I put the
playlist on YouTube as well so you click
on that that takes you to playlist our
playlist all of the playlist all the
playlist we've ever done right so if
you're listening to can I pod with

(01:08:35):
Madness episode 35 you go to the episode
35
playlist and all of the stuff we talked
about okay is going to be on there and
you can just luxuriate in you know
there's a bit of quo on there there's
spider nice there's the r adultery song
which we didn't really talk about

(01:08:55):
um de leopard photograph I mean that
came out this week so you know there's a
lovely heartwarming story that Tommy Lee
tells about Aussie Osborne that's on
there I've put the equivalent clip from
the dirt nice uh next to it I've put
oldtime rock and roll
with Risky Business uh thing and you

(01:09:17):
know just some general related stuff and
you just just have fun with it so enjoy
it but tell your friends tell your Kang
loving music fan friends and would you
appreciate it if people subscribed yeah
if you subscribe let us know that you
sub let us know you've listened you
don't have to tell us you like it I mean

(01:09:38):
we prefer it if you did just just say hi
you know just reach out cuz we are
getting people downloading it it would
be nice if in the comment section on
YouTube If people could let us know what
they were listening to at the same time
so if they're around on the year and
this month what they would have been
listening to what their total favorite

(01:10:00):
hit was the time 1984 yeah so pop it in
the comments if you were so what was
what was yours well I was about I was
young so I mean coulden something really
cool it's probably Van Halen Jump was it
when I was three or whatever yeah
probably something from choco block

(01:10:21):
choco block was
definitely you remember choco block
that's any three-year-old is going to
love jump CU it's a fun song I Wish I
Was that cool I'd love to I was that
cool I really don't think it was but let
us know in the comments let us know your
favorite 1984 hit yeah um let us know
what are you up to did you ever write

(01:10:42):
into karang yeah let us know that did
you have any lifelong friends that you
made yeah let us know these are the sort
of things we thrive on yeah and do you
like walking cheese have walking cheese
Try It Go on your little mental health
walk have some walking cheese and you be
like yeah I understand

(01:11:04):
now and what whatever cheese does it for
you but just try it I a hobbit would
have had walking cheese you know when
they're kind of wandering out they want
second breakfast yeah they carry a bit
of cheese with them wouldn't they yeah
probably back in back in those
days yeah I done by
it I don't care

(01:11:26):
all right yeah right stay metal stay
metal say
cheese
[Music]
[Applause]
bye na should they were
kickass and who should I tell him said
that tell him it was

(01:11:47):
SAS tell him it was a
f okay
you know what you better tell him it was
s Squatch they won't know what friends
are talking about oh okay sure see you
yeah so

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}PWM35: Walkin’ Cheese- Kerrang 62, Feb/March 1984 (part 1)

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PWM35: Walkin’ Cheese- Kerrang 62, Feb/March 1984 (part 1)

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