August 1, 2025 • 39 mins
In this episode of Christian Book Blurb, host Matt McChlery sits down with author Nikki Nhyira to discuss her powerful memoir, "Healing from Bulimia and the Truth Shall Set You Free." Nikki shares her personal journey of overcoming bulimia, the role of faith in her recovery, and the importance of surrendering control to find true freedom. Tune in for an inspiring conversation about healing, faith, and the transformative power of God and storytelling.
Links
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Visit Nikki Nhyira's website
With thanks to this episode's sponsors 'God Whispers are Life Changers' by Michael and Delane Salkheld
Takeaways
- Nikki Nhyira emphasizes addressing the mental aspects of eating disorders.
- Faith and surrendering control were pivotal in Nikki's healing journey.
- Honesty and open conversations are crucial for breaking stigma and building support.
Sound Bites
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"Healing is possible, and it starts with addressing the mental aspects of eating disorders, not just the physical symptoms."
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"Faith taught me to surrender control, and in doing so, I found true freedom and healing."
- "Honesty and authenticity are key to breaking the stigma around mental health and building supportive communities."
Chapters
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Introduction and Welcome - 00:00
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Understanding Bulimia - 02:15
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The Role of Faith in Recovery - 10:30
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Breaking the Stigma - 18:45
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Finding Freedom Through Surrender - 25:00
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Life After Recovery - 32:10
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Conclusion and Farewell - 40:00
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
This is Christian Book Blurb brought to you by author and songwriter Matt McChlery Get abehind the scenes glimpse into the lives of some of your favourite Christian authors, hear
about their books and faith.
Also, why not check out my website, mattmcleary.com.
This episode of Christian Book Blurb is sponsored by the book God Whispers Our LifeChanges by Michael and Delaine Sulkeld.
(00:26):
Available now from godwhispersforlife.com.
Hello and welcome to this episode of the Christian Book Blur podcast where we like toencourage you in your discipleship one book at a time.
As we meet some amazing Christian authors and learn about their books, their lives andtheir faith.
(00:49):
I'm your host, Matt McChlery.
Thank you so much for clicking over here and joining us today.
I'm going to be speaking about truth that heals and we're going to be delving into NikkiIntra's story.
all about overcoming bulimia.
Now let's welcome Nikki to the show.
(01:12):
Hi Nikki.
Hello.
Thanks so much for joining us today.
Now you've written a really good book called Healing from Bulimia and the Truth Shall SetYou Free.
So can you just tell us a little bit about your story?
Some of the history leading up to...
(01:35):
Well, first of all, I think let's begin with what is bulimia and then we can talk aboutsort of what led into it because...
Yeah, some listeners may not even know what it is.
Yes, of course.
oh Yeah, first of all, I just wanted to say thank you so much for having me on.
It's such an honor.
(01:55):
excited.
Yeah, I'm looking forward to having this discussion.
oh So bulimia is an eating disorder uh that some may or may not be aware of.
And the eating disorder is basically characterized by periods of time where you restrictyour food intentionally, uh periods of time where
(02:18):
Food is then purged usually, but there's also a strand called non-purging bulimia.
So it's essentially, you feel guilty for consuming food, even though it's just healthyfood for your body.
And usually you try to compensate for those behaviors.
So it might be self-induced vomiting, it might be using laxatives, and usually people arevery concerned about their weight and their body image.
(02:42):
So it's a mental illness that's characterized by a lot of distress around your body image.
And is it linked to anorexia?
I think people know of anorexia a bit more.
Is there a link or is it just another eating disorder on the same sort of spectrum?
Yeah, so it is a different eating disorder, but I would say they're linked in that a lotof eating disorders have commonalities between them.
(03:06):
And some people might actually fluctuate between different eating disorders.
So you might go from being diagnosed as anorexic to maybe being diagnosed as bulimic tomaybe suffering with binge eating disorders.
So there's a wide spectrum of eating disorders.
And your book, Healing from Volumia and the Truth Shall Set You Free.
(03:30):
It's, it, you've done it really well.
I've been really impressed with it.
Oh, thank you.
In that it's, it's a memoir.
You're telling your story of what you went through and you do really well in conveyingsort of the emotions and the mental state that you're in at the certain times that you've
(03:51):
told us about.
But then you're also balancing that with sort of
education and scripture and sort of a teaching element as well.
that's really good.
So let's just go back to your story then.
um So can you just tell us some of the history leading up to your eating disorder?
Yes, so I would say it started first coming online when I was around 14.
(04:16):
And I think there were numerous factors that contributed to that.
I come from a very sort of like a mixed family or mixed household in that half of myfamily are athletic, like professional athletes.
And then the other half really, really struggled with body image and their weight and notreally liking how they looked.
(04:38):
And so
I think the message that I got growing up, even though it wasn't intentional, but themessage was essentially like, the body is something that needs to be very strictly
controlled and disciplined.
And if you're out of control at any point, then, quote unquote, you can gain weight.
And that's possibly like the worst thing that you can do.
was very much, it was just the unconscious message that was there.
(05:02):
So I think that was already in the foundations of my thinking, oh I think as well growingup.
as a young woman as well, there's lots of pressure placed upon you and your body image aswell.
And so it sort of came online around 14 years old as a way to kind of control elements ofmy life that I saw as uncontrollable.
I had quite like a strict household and I think my brain automatically went to, okay, away that I can regain control is around how I look essentially.
(05:33):
And so it started off with you wanting to have control or have sort of some sense ofcontrol.
But then as you say in your book, it then started controlling you, the tables kind ofturned.
So how did the eating disorder start to take over your life?
(05:55):
Yeah, so they're a weird one because exactly as you said, you can start feeling like,yeah, this is it.
I'm gaining back control.
I'm in charge.
But you're never really in control.
I sort of liken eating disorders to addictions.
There's a point at which the tables really do turn.
And for me, that came in, it really stole a lot of my concentration and my autonomy.
(06:18):
So this was when I was in school, about 14, 15.
It would be situations where, you know, I can't concentrate in class or...
revised for my classes, literally because I would be so hungry because I hadn't eaten inhow many days or that day, for example, it would control how I spent time with friends.
(06:38):
And also what's really, I think quite insidious about them is that it really just takesover your mind.
So every single moment I'm thinking about how to cut calories, I'm thinking about, I lookreally awful in this.
always trying to...
you know, uh fix something that was never really an issue, but it just completely takesover uh your mind, your time.
(06:59):
You know, I wasn't going out with friends, that sort of thing.
And you also speak about, in the book, where...
You were, you were wanting help, but lots of things got in the way of you actuallyspeaking it out loud.
(07:23):
There's one instance where you wrote a letter that you were going to give to a doctor.
And it's a fantastic letter.
And I'm reading it thinking, yes, if the doctor sees this, you're definitely going to getthe help you need.
And then you say, oh, well, I never sent that letter.
And it was just like, ah, so, so what.
What were some of the barriers that kept you from seeking help, even though you kind ofwanted it?
(07:50):
Yeah, there were so many.
mean, the first one was racially um in terms of the school I went to and my upbringing.
So I'm a black woman uh and I grew up in a very sort of like Caucasian environment.
And I think unfortunately, there's still a stigma around eating disorders and they'restill viewed as very much like a white woman's disease, which isn't true.
(08:12):
Like it affects people from all different racial backgrounds, uh all different classbackgrounds.
But in terms of the rep...
representation is actually not really there for black and brown bodies.
Especially on films and things, you get the stereotypical image, you?
Yes, definitely.
And even when eating disorders are represented, I would find a lot more narratives aroundanorexia and around being very slim and underweight.
(08:36):
So it was a mixture of being a black woman and not I wasn't physically underweight, whichI think is quite important to mention.
With non-purging bulimia and bulimia in general, the danger isn't necessarily from beingphysically underweight.
It's more the mental illness.
It can lead to depression.
And there were points where I was very
suicidal, it has negative impacts on your heart and on all sorts of internal organsbecause you're not looking after them properly.
(09:03):
But I think so something that stopped me was saying like, I couldn't possibly have aneating disorder.
I'm quote unquote overweight according to BMI, which isn't necessarily the best indicationof your health, right?
em Or I'm a black woman and people are going to see that and think, no, you don't havehave this issue.
So there was a lot of shame, I think, around my actual physical weight.
(09:25):
Around my faith as well, think I had sort of interpreted Christianity as meaning that Ishouldn't have any issues or that my eating disorder was a reflection of my lack of faith.
And so almost speaking out about the eating disorder felt like I would be being like a badtestimony to God.
(09:45):
Yeah, I was going to ask you how sort of your faith impacted that as well, so that'sreally interesting.
So you do mention in your book that you have actually broken free from this um eatingdisorder.
So how did you manage to break free?
(10:05):
Yes, so one of the main reasons I wrote the book obviously is to help people to break freethemselves and also because I really wanted to take the time to explain the nuances of how
I was healed because I think if I just say it flippantly it sounds so crazy that and Idon't want people to take it the wrong way but one of the big things was that I actually
(10:30):
engaged in the Daniel Fast, the 21 Day Fast.
And the focus there was not weight loss.
The focus there was not even praying to God to heal me from an eating disordernecessarily.
The focus was I just wanted to spend time with God essentially.
And it was sort of the first fast I'd ever engaged in.
And the reason I say it's so crazy is that it almost sounds like telling someone who's anaddict, you know, I just went on a bender for a weekend and then I didn't have any issues
(10:57):
afterwards.
Like I would never really tell someone, you know.
Just fast if you have an eating disorder and that was so obvious.
Because I don't think that's what it was, but I think God used that time to reprogram mymind and draw me closer to Him and root me deeper in love and faith and surrender the
control that I was trying so tightly to have around my body and around my life.
(11:21):
And so that really, after that, I didn't actually experience any bilinear symptoms at all.
And then even before that, I think He was taking me on this journey of
learning that I am lovable uh on this journey of learning to surrender.
I think surrender is probably the biggest word that comes up for me.
I was really trying to control how others saw me, trying to control how I received love.
(11:46):
uh Almost like I will deserve love when I look a certain way or when I feel a certain wayin my body.
And I think God was teaching me like, no, actually you are already loved.
it's okay that you have weaknesses and vulnerabilities because I'm able to overcome all ofthose.
This idea of control is very interesting.
(12:09):
Where it starts off, you want it to be in control and then it kind of takes over control.
But actually you found freedom by surrendering control to God rather than to the disorderor to other people's expectations or your thoughts of what other people might be thinking
(12:30):
of you or what you're thinking of yourself.
You just...
it's a surrender of that control um brought that freedom.
That's really interesting.
You mentioned that you wrote the book because you wanted to give the nuances surroundingyour healing journey, is great.
But for me, for someone who, I say I haven't experienced eating, I love eating too much, Ithink.
(12:58):
a bit too much.
was doing a workout just before this.
I must admit I haven't done a workout in I don't know how long, but I need to because youknow, the desserts that there's too many around that I enjoy.
We love eating too, like people with eating disorders also enjoy eating it.
It's just there's so much fear and shame around it as well that's attached to it.
(13:20):
Yeah, yeah, no, that is a good point.
But I'm just saying that your book, your book, um gives, gave me, I must say, an insightand a better understanding around what people who are experiencing an eating disorder,
might be thinking or going through.
(13:42):
And I must admit, certain people came to mind as I was reading it thinking, oh
this person might be on a similar journey because of what they said last month orsomething that happened.
I was like, oh, this kind of ties in.
I mean, they might not have an eating disorder, but you know, it just got me thinking abit more and trying to be a bit more aware of others just because I haven't experienced
(14:15):
it.
I'm not too sure what to look for or how to react.
so this book really helped in that.
So that was useful.
So thank you.
breaking free from your eating disorder and where are you today?
(14:36):
Where are you at right now as we talk together?
Yes, so by God's grace, I'm very happy, very healthy, very stable when it comes to bodyimage.
That's not to say I never have a down like day.
It's not to say like, I'll never, you know, feel like, I wish I looked like this person orthat.
But I think the difference is almost instantly, I recognize that, you know, attemptednegative pattern of thinking and I never allow myself to go down that path because I know
(15:04):
it's not true.
I like, why would I spend my time?
sort of spiraling on something that's not true and it's not helpful.
em And I can re-anchor myself on the truth.
Yeah, so I'm an artist, em I live in London.
I just think the difference is just that mental clarity and that freedom to live how Ibelieve God has purposed me to live.
(15:28):
I've got a lovely support system, wonderful family and friends.
em And yeah, it's actually funny because I think...
If I hadn't written this book, I probably wouldn't spend much time reflecting on eatingdisorders or being in that space.
eh And the book is kind of what's brought me back there to be thinking about it.
(15:48):
But I just point that out to say there's like a massive difference in my thinking now.
Yeah, really good.
And it's that, as the Bible says, how we take captive every thought and make it obedientto Christ and His Word.
yeah, that's really good.
So in the book, Healing from Bulimia and the Truth Shall Set You Free, you have a chapterin it called Christianity and Prayer Group.
(16:13):
And in it you say, I thought having faith meant I had to be happy all the time.
But then...
your experience was you weren't happy all the time.
So could you just explain, oh well, if faith isn't being happy all the time, what is itactually?
Yeah.
So for me, faith is an unshakable foundation in what God says, in God's word, and what hesays.
(16:43):
That looks at it with all the nuance and complexity of the Bible.
Because I think sometimes we take things out of context.
So we look at verses that say, not be anxious about anything.
And then the second we feel any kind of spike of anxiety, it's like, that's it, I don'thave faith.
or I'm singing against God because I experienced anxiety.
But I think I'm really learning to, you know, look at the Bible as a whole.
(17:06):
I'm reading Psalms at the moment and there's so much in there about anxiety, you know?
When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought me joy.
It's not that David didn't experience anxiety, it's that he was able to bring it to God.
So for me, faith is now being honest about my experience and then being authentic enoughto say, hey God, this is how I'm feeling, but...
(17:29):
I know that you are sovereign over everything.
I think that's always the arc of the Psalms is I'm gonna lay out everything that I'mfeeling right now, but I'm also going to remind myself and my soul within me that you are
sovereign and you are in control and I can trust your plan is good for me and that youmake all things work together for my good.
So I think for me now, faith is saying, okay, here's what I'm experiencing in thephysical, but let me now em place that under the authority of the spiritual.
(18:00):
That's really good.
That's really good.
Thank you for that.
uh You also say elsewhere in the book that an eating disorder is a mental illness withphysical effects.
So can you just explain what you mean by this?
Yes, so I think we can get the two muddled and we can look at eating disorders as aphysical illness alone and it's not as a mental illness first and then the physical is a
(18:32):
byproduct of what's happening in your mental state.
oh And the reason I think it's really important to differentiate between the two is thatagain, like I had a lot of shame around, oh, I'm not.
massively underweight, therefore I can't seek help or treatment.
Not realizing that the issue was the mental illness.
Like if I was mentally healthy, I wouldn't be in these cycles, these obsessive cycles.
(18:55):
If I was mentally healthy, I'd be able to go out with my friends.
I wouldn't be terrified of looking in a mirror, these kinds of things.
So it's like focusing first on what mental effects are you experiencing?
And then yes, some people gain weight, some people lose weight, some people stay the sameway, but that's not the important thing.
It's always uh the mental that needs to be tackled.
(19:20):
In the book, you dig into this, you've already mentioned the Psalms, which was reallyhelpful, but does the Bible have anything to say about mental illness?
Because I think one of the things in the book you were saying was,
when you first sort of thought about, well, you know, mental illness, must mean I'mfailing as a Christian.
(19:43):
The Bible doesn't really talk about mental illness.
So therefore it shouldn't, you know, if I have it, therefore I'm not doing very well.
um But what does the Bible have things to say about mental illness?
Yeah, I definitely think so.
And I think it took me a long time to realize this.
I think one of my key verses, and it's something that I mention a lot in the memoir, is,my grace is sufficient for you, for my powers made perfect in weakness.
(20:15):
And I think for me, that's been such a grounding verse because I'm going, oh, actually,not only is my weakness okay, but it's the place in which God's grace is sufficient.
So I don't need to hide, I'm having mental struggles because God's grace is bigger thanany mental struggle.
So I think for me that that verse has really stuck with me and stayed true.
(20:39):
And then another thing that I felt like I got revelation around was just how Jesusoperated and the different types of afflictions that he healed and was willing to heal.
And they weren't all physical.
Some of these, I mean, the language used would have been
you know, someone is demon possessed, right?
(21:00):
And so like in the book, I kind of talk about maybe the different levels on which we cansee that language.
So yes, there's the spiritual, but then there's also, you know, now no one would ever saysomeone's demon possessed uh in a more like secular Western society.
But you would use words like fighting or demons.
You would use words like they're losing the fight against this kind of mental illness,right?
(21:22):
And so when I see Jesus interact with these people who are demon possessed,
I see him healing mental illnesses.
He talks about saving a boy who would throw himself into the fire.
He talks about saving a man who lived in the tombs and would cut himself.
To me, that's a self-harmer, that's someone with depression, which is something I used toengage in as well.
(21:46):
For me, he was going around healing not only physical, but mental illnesses.
That's really interesting.
And we also get characters in the Bible, don't we, who have sort of signs of mentalillness.
I'm thinking of, is it Jonah after he was really cross because God actually saved the citythat he went to and then he went to depression and sat under this tree and sort of, you
(22:15):
know, just depressed.
And was it Elijah as well?
think he had moments of...
of depression running away from God and anxiety attacks and all sorts of things.
Yep.
Yeah, one of them is definitely saying something along the lines of, that's it, I'm done,just take my life now.
You know?
Yeah.
yeah, yeah.
I wish I was never born, all that kind of thing.
(22:36):
Yeah, and got had very different responses to both of them, think, depending on who theywere as an individual.
So I think also healing can be very individual.
Hmm, no that's a good point.
Just before we have a short break, could you share with our listeners some of the thingsthat you found helpful in overcoming your eating disorder?
(23:02):
Yes.
So the first thing I would say is just to keep trying because I really do believe that uhhealing is possible.
And just because you try one avenue and it doesn't work doesn't mean a different avenue isnot going to work.
For me, I think opening up about the eating disorder was really useful because the eatingdisorder had kept me so shrouded in shame that it wasn't until I started speaking about it
(23:29):
that some of that
those boundaries, kind of shackles were able to be released.
I think that honesty and authenticity with others and with God em is actually what enablesyou to start stepping into freedom.
I'm thinking of things like em the, I don't know what the word would be, like maybe themantra, the list that the alcoholics anonymous have.
(23:51):
And one of them is being honest with myself, with others and with God.
And I think that trifecta is so important.
uh And once you're honest with one, I think you can start being open to be honest withothers.
And then once you're open, you can start getting a support system around you that mightlook like uh treatment from an eating disorder specialist center, but it might also look
(24:14):
like therapy.
It might also look like um journaling, whatever that is, but think having a robust supportsystem around you.
And then one thing I always say, like at the beginning, especially of the journey, I thinkit's quite important to do.
is to make a commitment em and do that in a very physical, tangible way by maybe throwingaway items that have anchored you to a false identity of an eating disorder.
(24:38):
So a lot of people have apps installed on their phone, apps that track your weight lossand every calorie that you eat, delete the apps.
oh If it's social media accounts that you're following that are really triggering or booksor whatever that is, but I think that you know what,
those things are that you turn to to maybe trigger you or to enable you to do thesethings.
(25:02):
And I think throwing them away is useful.
One thing in the book that you mentioned was that when you were throwing things away, Ithink it was your parents bathroom scales.
Chuck those in the bin.
Oh, well, I've never seen any of them use the scales, so they're not going to miss them.
(25:23):
So into the bin they go.
Yeah, that was.
It got to that point I was like we need to make some drastic action here.
Yeah, yeah, that's good.
thank you.
That's really helpful.
That's really helpful.
We've been chatting with the author Nikki Intra all about her book Healing from Bulimiaand The Truth Shall Set You Free.
(25:43):
Now I'll be back chatting with Nikki more about her life and her faith just after these,so stay tuned.
God Whispers Our Life Changes, a book by Michael and Delaine Sulkeld, is an incredibletrue-life story of Michael and Delaine, an ordinary couple who listened as God led them
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It is a story of life lessons by example.
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to keep supporting Christian books and authors.
Hi, welcome back to the Christian Book Blur podcast.
I've been chatting with author Nikki Inshera all about her book Healing from Bulimia andthe Truth Shall Set You Free.
We've had a great discussion all about the topics in the book before the break.
But on this side of the interval, Nikki, we like to, well, get to know the author a bit iswhat I usually say, but I think we've got to know you quite well already through what
(27:52):
we've been talking about.
But let's go for it.
you do for fun.
Yes, I am restarting to learn how to play piano.
That's been fun.
Yeah, it's really, fun.
I used to play as a child.
And then I stopped when I hit grade four.
I don't know if it's the same now, but grade four was the point where the theory startedto get really serious.
(28:17):
em And I, yeah, I was not very good at theory at all.
And I kind of stopped and I was never really practicing.
em But
I'm sort of just getting back into it for fun.
I'm learning how to play Bohemian Rhapsody at the moment.
We're halfway through.
Oh, wow.
Very fun.
Very exciting.
I was just about to say, have you gone right back to the very beginning, like do-re-mikind of stuff or...
(28:43):
Bohemian Rhapsody is pretty, serious stuff.
I know, I know.
mean, I'm playing, you know, my version of it.
I'm definitely not hitting every single part.
But yeah, I think just kind of learning how to enjoy hobbies again is fun.
I do a lot of dancing as well.
(29:04):
not at the same time as you play the piano
at the same time, I mean that would be cool.
That would be interesting.
Yeah.
That's the next challenge.
Yeah, no, really good.
um And what do you do?
You briefly mentioned that sort of what you do as a job or a career.
(29:25):
What are you involved in?
Yeah, so I'm actually a performer and a writer and a lecturer.
So I teach theatre and I teach uh playwriting and sort of creative writing, that sort ofthing.
And generally just help people tell stories is what I love to do.
Okay.
(29:45):
So storyteller in all sorts of different creative forms in a way.
Yeah.
Good.
I could see that that comes through in the book.
And is there a particular place on the planet that you really enjoy going to or visiting,or maybe you went there once on holiday and it was just fantastic.
(30:08):
Do you have somewhere special like that?
I am obsessed with Portugal.
I don't know what it is, but I love it.
Have you been?
No, not Portugal.
I've only been to like Portuguese restaurants, but I've actually been to the countryitself.
you should go because the food will be even better there, you know, so.
(30:28):
uh Yeah, I love it.
I don't know what it is.
I went there for a few years ago with a few friends.
And I think what it is that I really I love languages as well.
And I thought the language sound is so beautiful.
But the people were so welcoming.
And I left and I thought, okay, I need to learn Portuguese.
So I came back home, learned a bit of Portuguese, went and visited again, was able to havesome conversations with people.
(30:52):
Um, and i'm hopefully gonna go again next month actually
wow, wonderful.
When you say learn Portuguese, was it like using the Duolingo app or was yeah.
I was a Duolingo fiend for ages and that got me to a pretty decent level and then I gotbored of it and then I started listening to a few different podcasts.
(31:13):
I got myself to a, I would say a decent level and then I think I've fallen off it forquite a while now.
So I need to get my practice back on.
um Do you like hot drinks or cold drinks?
Hot drinks, I like tea.
I was gonna say, what's your go-to?
And is that, is that a normal sort of English breakfast or do you do sort of theseinfusions of, you know, like peppermint or green tea or...
(31:40):
You know what?
It's just a boring breakfast, builder's breakfast.
Yeah, that's it.
Does it have lots of sugar in it or no sugar?
oh
just the builder's breakfast and then some so I'm I'm a sort of a cheat vegan at themoment.
So I was vegan for quite a few years.
And that was something I didn't mention earlier that was sort of part of the eating sortof recovery journey.
(32:03):
uh And now I'm a bit more open and flexible, but I usually will just have like a soy milkor an almond milk because I prefer those milks now.
Okay.
Have you got any family?
I know we've talked about sort of relationships with parents and things in the lead up toyour story kicking off, but what about now?
Yeah, so I am, I'm the eldest of four children.
(32:25):
I've got three younger brothers.
I'm the only girl.
And we're all very close, which is lovely.
I went to see them this weekend, which was really nice.
Hadn't seen them in a while.
And I'm actually, this is a really interesting question because I'm actually on thejourney of reconnecting with a lot of family.
So when you were asking about places I like being, my other place that immediately came tomind was Ghana.
(32:50):
That's where my family are from.
Okay.
And I was able to travel to see some family I hadn't seen in decades a couple of yearsago.
And I think slowly those connections are being rebuilt.
So that's lovely to see.
lovely.
Yeah, that is great.
I'm, I'm from Zimbabwe myself originally.
An African connection there.
(33:14):
I did, well, like you, I did when I had family there.
Um, but all my sort of immediate family, have now left the country.
So I haven't been back in, in a long while, but there's, there's a few Zimbabwean familiesin my church actually.
Um, and they've been back fairly recently.
So.
I get little updates and snippets as to, you know, how things are going and that kind ofthing.
(33:38):
So yeah, that's good.
What is the Holy Spirit doing in your life at the moment?
Or has the Spirit put something on your heart that you're particularly thinking about orlearning about at the moment?
he is telling me to rest and I find that such a challenge.
(33:58):
I've got lots of podcast episodes about it, you know?
know.
Honestly, I need all the help I can get because every time I'm going to him and saying,okay, what next?
What next, Lord?
He's like, yeah, just rest.
Please give me something more tangible.
Yeah, I to run around.
I want something to do.
And he's just actually really telling me to take the time to rest in him.
(34:21):
So that's what I have to do.
So yeah, one particular episode, I think it's episode 40, it's called Understanding Restas Worship with a guy who's involved with like music and stuff called Sam Hargreaves.
And he's written a good book called The Rest is Worship.
That's the name of his book.
um And something that I learned from that, which I hadn't before, was he talked about thisthing called active rest.
(34:50):
Okay, yeah.
Rest doesn't just have to be sitting and doing nothing.
or sitting and watching Netflix, therefore I'm resting.
But you can just by doing something different that you don't normally do, can still giveyou that sense of rest and release, even though you're still doing.
(35:11):
It's like an active rest rather than just sitting and letting the world go by kind ofrest.
So that was interesting.
Anyway, there we go.
I thought I'd just drop that in there and a little bit.
40 if people...
are interested on the rest topic.
Have you got anything coming up soon?
(35:31):
Are you working on another book or project or, you know, it might not be a book, it mightbe something theatrical.
What are you working on at the moment?
So at the moment, I've just finished writing a script, actually, a screenplay, which is myfirst ever screenplay.
So I'm really excited about that.
I'm at the process of sharing it with some industry professionals and getting back lots offeedback and seeing what I want to tweak about it.
(35:57):
And I'm also, so this one is more, I'm thinking about it, but I would really love to seehow I can bring that into fruition at some point.
But I'm really interested in,
this concept of applying theology to um performance.
And specifically, I'm thinking about the theology of the actor's body.
(36:19):
how to, like, what does the Bible say about the body and how we can harness the body asworship?
And then how does that then translate to how actors are able to use their bodies?
So I think it's just this concept of combining everything I'm interested in, which islike,
bodies, body image, worship, and the arts.
(36:42):
Yeah.
I don't know when that's coming, but that's what I'm thinking.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
No, yeah, it's good.
It's a seed of an idea that's just starting to work its way through.
No, that's great.
Nikki, where can people find you to connect with you like social media or websites?
And more importantly, where can people buy your book Healing from Bulimia and the TruthShall Say?
(37:07):
Yes, so there's a few different places.
On Instagram, I've just recently started a new page called the Surrendered RecoveryProject.
No, the Surrendered Recovery Project.
And on there, there's updates about the book and also just some inspirational thoughts andinsights around body image just to help people through recovery.
(37:28):
I have a YouTube channel called Artist Archives, or lowercase, two words.
And you can find me on there usually talking about whatever creative project I'm on next.
And I have a new, quite a small, but a new, it's very exciting, a podcast called TheArtist Theology, which I can send a link to as well, uh talking about the relationship
(37:50):
between art and faith, because they're my two favorite topics.
And in terms of finding the book, it is available to purchase on Amazon, wherever youlive, really.
Wonderful.
So I'll pop a link to um your new Instagram page on the episode show notes so people canconnect with you and find out more about you um that way.
(38:17):
That just leaves you to say thank you so much, Nikki.
Thank you for your time.
Thank you for coming and speaking about your faith, your life, and your journey as well.
It's been a joy speaking to you today.
Thank you.
Thank you so much for having me, I loved it.
I just want to give a really big thank you to the sponsors of today's episode.
This is the book God Whispers Our Life Changes by Michael and Delaine Selkeld.
(38:41):
That book is available now from their website, GodWhispersForLife.com.
Do go and check it out.
And thanks also to you for listening to this episode of the Christian Book Blurb podcast.
Don't forget we come out on the first and the 15th of every month, so it will only be ashort few weeks.
before I'm back again speaking with another Christian author all about their books, theirlife and their faith.
(39:05):
So to encourage you in your discipleship one book at a time.
So do join me then.
I look forward to having the pleasure of your company really soon.
Thank you.
Goodbye.
Thanks for listening to Christian Book Blurb with your host, Matt McChlery.
Do give it a like, give it a share and let your friends know all about it.
(39:27):
We do hope to see you again soon.
on another Christian Book Blob.
This is Christian Book Blurb brought to you by author and songwriter Matt McChlery Get abehind the scenes glimpse into the lives of some of your favourite Christian authors, hear
about their books and faith.
Also, why not check out my website, mattmcleary.com.
This episode of Christian Book Blurb is sponsored by the book God Whispers Our LifeChanges by Michael and Delaine Sulkeld.
(00:26):
Available now from godwhispersforlife.com.
Hello and welcome to this episode of the Christian Book Blur podcast where we like toencourage you in your discipleship one book at a time.
As we meet some amazing Christian authors and learn about their books, their lives andtheir faith.
(00:49):
I'm your host, Matt McChlery.
Thank you so much for clicking over here and joining us today.
I'm going to be speaking about truth that heals and we're going to be delving into NikkiIntra's story.
all about overcoming bulimia.
Now let's welcome Nikki to the show.
(01:12):
Hi Nikki.
Hello.
Thanks so much for joining us today.
Now you've written a really good book called Healing from Bulimia and the Truth Shall SetYou Free.
So can you just tell us a little bit about your story?
Some of the history leading up to...
(01:35):
Well, first of all, I think let's begin with what is bulimia and then we can talk aboutsort of what led into it because...
Yeah, some listeners may not even know what it is.
Yes, of course.
oh Yeah, first of all, I just wanted to say thank you so much for having me on.
It's such an honor.
(01:55):
excited.
Yeah, I'm looking forward to having this discussion.
oh So bulimia is an eating disorder uh that some may or may not be aware of.
And the eating disorder is basically characterized by periods of time where you restrictyour food intentionally, uh periods of time where
(02:18):
Food is then purged usually, but there's also a strand called non-purging bulimia.
So it's essentially, you feel guilty for consuming food, even though it's just healthyfood for your body.
And usually you try to compensate for those behaviors.
So it might be self-induced vomiting, it might be using laxatives, and usually people arevery concerned about their weight and their body image.
(02:42):
So it's a mental illness that's characterized by a lot of distress around your body image.
And is it linked to anorexia?
I think people know of anorexia a bit more.
Is there a link or is it just another eating disorder on the same sort of spectrum?
Yeah, so it is a different eating disorder, but I would say they're linked in that a lotof eating disorders have commonalities between them.
(03:06):
And some people might actually fluctuate between different eating disorders.
So you might go from being diagnosed as anorexic to maybe being diagnosed as bulimic tomaybe suffering with binge eating disorders.
So there's a wide spectrum of eating disorders.
And your book, Healing from Volumia and the Truth Shall Set You Free.
(03:30):
It's, it, you've done it really well.
I've been really impressed with it.
Oh, thank you.
In that it's, it's a memoir.
You're telling your story of what you went through and you do really well in conveyingsort of the emotions and the mental state that you're in at the certain times that you've
(03:51):
told us about.
But then you're also balancing that with sort of
education and scripture and sort of a teaching element as well.
that's really good.
So let's just go back to your story then.
um So can you just tell us some of the history leading up to your eating disorder?
Yes, so I would say it started first coming online when I was around 14.
(04:16):
And I think there were numerous factors that contributed to that.
I come from a very sort of like a mixed family or mixed household in that half of myfamily are athletic, like professional athletes.
And then the other half really, really struggled with body image and their weight and notreally liking how they looked.
(04:38):
And so
I think the message that I got growing up, even though it wasn't intentional, but themessage was essentially like, the body is something that needs to be very strictly
controlled and disciplined.
And if you're out of control at any point, then, quote unquote, you can gain weight.
And that's possibly like the worst thing that you can do.
was very much, it was just the unconscious message that was there.
(05:02):
So I think that was already in the foundations of my thinking, oh I think as well growingup.
as a young woman as well, there's lots of pressure placed upon you and your body image aswell.
And so it sort of came online around 14 years old as a way to kind of control elements ofmy life that I saw as uncontrollable.
I had quite like a strict household and I think my brain automatically went to, okay, away that I can regain control is around how I look essentially.
(05:33):
And so it started off with you wanting to have control or have sort of some sense ofcontrol.
But then as you say in your book, it then started controlling you, the tables kind ofturned.
So how did the eating disorder start to take over your life?
(05:55):
Yeah, so they're a weird one because exactly as you said, you can start feeling like,yeah, this is it.
I'm gaining back control.
I'm in charge.
But you're never really in control.
I sort of liken eating disorders to addictions.
There's a point at which the tables really do turn.
And for me, that came in, it really stole a lot of my concentration and my autonomy.
(06:18):
So this was when I was in school, about 14, 15.
It would be situations where, you know, I can't concentrate in class or...
revised for my classes, literally because I would be so hungry because I hadn't eaten inhow many days or that day, for example, it would control how I spent time with friends.
(06:38):
And also what's really, I think quite insidious about them is that it really just takesover your mind.
So every single moment I'm thinking about how to cut calories, I'm thinking about, I lookreally awful in this.
always trying to...
you know, uh fix something that was never really an issue, but it just completely takesover uh your mind, your time.
(06:59):
You know, I wasn't going out with friends, that sort of thing.
And you also speak about, in the book, where...
You were, you were wanting help, but lots of things got in the way of you actuallyspeaking it out loud.
(07:23):
There's one instance where you wrote a letter that you were going to give to a doctor.
And it's a fantastic letter.
And I'm reading it thinking, yes, if the doctor sees this, you're definitely going to getthe help you need.
And then you say, oh, well, I never sent that letter.
And it was just like, ah, so, so what.
What were some of the barriers that kept you from seeking help, even though you kind ofwanted it?
(07:50):
Yeah, there were so many.
mean, the first one was racially um in terms of the school I went to and my upbringing.
So I'm a black woman uh and I grew up in a very sort of like Caucasian environment.
And I think unfortunately, there's still a stigma around eating disorders and they'restill viewed as very much like a white woman's disease, which isn't true.
(08:12):
Like it affects people from all different racial backgrounds, uh all different classbackgrounds.
But in terms of the rep...
representation is actually not really there for black and brown bodies.
Especially on films and things, you get the stereotypical image, you?
Yes, definitely.
And even when eating disorders are represented, I would find a lot more narratives aroundanorexia and around being very slim and underweight.
(08:36):
So it was a mixture of being a black woman and not I wasn't physically underweight, whichI think is quite important to mention.
With non-purging bulimia and bulimia in general, the danger isn't necessarily from beingphysically underweight.
It's more the mental illness.
It can lead to depression.
And there were points where I was very
suicidal, it has negative impacts on your heart and on all sorts of internal organsbecause you're not looking after them properly.
(09:03):
But I think so something that stopped me was saying like, I couldn't possibly have aneating disorder.
I'm quote unquote overweight according to BMI, which isn't necessarily the best indicationof your health, right?
em Or I'm a black woman and people are going to see that and think, no, you don't havehave this issue.
So there was a lot of shame, I think, around my actual physical weight.
(09:25):
Around my faith as well, think I had sort of interpreted Christianity as meaning that Ishouldn't have any issues or that my eating disorder was a reflection of my lack of faith.
And so almost speaking out about the eating disorder felt like I would be being like a badtestimony to God.
(09:45):
Yeah, I was going to ask you how sort of your faith impacted that as well, so that'sreally interesting.
So you do mention in your book that you have actually broken free from this um eatingdisorder.
So how did you manage to break free?
(10:05):
Yes, so one of the main reasons I wrote the book obviously is to help people to break freethemselves and also because I really wanted to take the time to explain the nuances of how
I was healed because I think if I just say it flippantly it sounds so crazy that and Idon't want people to take it the wrong way but one of the big things was that I actually
(10:30):
engaged in the Daniel Fast, the 21 Day Fast.
And the focus there was not weight loss.
The focus there was not even praying to God to heal me from an eating disordernecessarily.
The focus was I just wanted to spend time with God essentially.
And it was sort of the first fast I'd ever engaged in.
And the reason I say it's so crazy is that it almost sounds like telling someone who's anaddict, you know, I just went on a bender for a weekend and then I didn't have any issues
(10:57):
afterwards.
Like I would never really tell someone, you know.
Just fast if you have an eating disorder and that was so obvious.
Because I don't think that's what it was, but I think God used that time to reprogram mymind and draw me closer to Him and root me deeper in love and faith and surrender the
control that I was trying so tightly to have around my body and around my life.
(11:21):
And so that really, after that, I didn't actually experience any bilinear symptoms at all.
And then even before that, I think He was taking me on this journey of
learning that I am lovable uh on this journey of learning to surrender.
I think surrender is probably the biggest word that comes up for me.
I was really trying to control how others saw me, trying to control how I received love.
(11:46):
uh Almost like I will deserve love when I look a certain way or when I feel a certain wayin my body.
And I think God was teaching me like, no, actually you are already loved.
it's okay that you have weaknesses and vulnerabilities because I'm able to overcome all ofthose.
This idea of control is very interesting.
(12:09):
Where it starts off, you want it to be in control and then it kind of takes over control.
But actually you found freedom by surrendering control to God rather than to the disorderor to other people's expectations or your thoughts of what other people might be thinking
(12:30):
of you or what you're thinking of yourself.
You just...
it's a surrender of that control um brought that freedom.
That's really interesting.
You mentioned that you wrote the book because you wanted to give the nuances surroundingyour healing journey, is great.
But for me, for someone who, I say I haven't experienced eating, I love eating too much, Ithink.
(12:58):
a bit too much.
was doing a workout just before this.
I must admit I haven't done a workout in I don't know how long, but I need to because youknow, the desserts that there's too many around that I enjoy.
We love eating too, like people with eating disorders also enjoy eating it.
It's just there's so much fear and shame around it as well that's attached to it.
(13:20):
Yeah, yeah, no, that is a good point.
But I'm just saying that your book, your book, um gives, gave me, I must say, an insightand a better understanding around what people who are experiencing an eating disorder,
might be thinking or going through.
(13:42):
And I must admit, certain people came to mind as I was reading it thinking, oh
this person might be on a similar journey because of what they said last month orsomething that happened.
I was like, oh, this kind of ties in.
I mean, they might not have an eating disorder, but you know, it just got me thinking abit more and trying to be a bit more aware of others just because I haven't experienced
(14:15):
it.
I'm not too sure what to look for or how to react.
so this book really helped in that.
So that was useful.
So thank you.
breaking free from your eating disorder and where are you today?
(14:36):
Where are you at right now as we talk together?
Yes, so by God's grace, I'm very happy, very healthy, very stable when it comes to bodyimage.
That's not to say I never have a down like day.
It's not to say like, I'll never, you know, feel like, I wish I looked like this person orthat.
But I think the difference is almost instantly, I recognize that, you know, attemptednegative pattern of thinking and I never allow myself to go down that path because I know
(15:04):
it's not true.
I like, why would I spend my time?
sort of spiraling on something that's not true and it's not helpful.
em And I can re-anchor myself on the truth.
Yeah, so I'm an artist, em I live in London.
I just think the difference is just that mental clarity and that freedom to live how Ibelieve God has purposed me to live.
(15:28):
I've got a lovely support system, wonderful family and friends.
em And yeah, it's actually funny because I think...
If I hadn't written this book, I probably wouldn't spend much time reflecting on eatingdisorders or being in that space.
eh And the book is kind of what's brought me back there to be thinking about it.
(15:48):
But I just point that out to say there's like a massive difference in my thinking now.
Yeah, really good.
And it's that, as the Bible says, how we take captive every thought and make it obedientto Christ and His Word.
yeah, that's really good.
So in the book, Healing from Bulimia and the Truth Shall Set You Free, you have a chapterin it called Christianity and Prayer Group.
(16:13):
And in it you say, I thought having faith meant I had to be happy all the time.
But then...
your experience was you weren't happy all the time.
So could you just explain, oh well, if faith isn't being happy all the time, what is itactually?
Yeah.
So for me, faith is an unshakable foundation in what God says, in God's word, and what hesays.
(16:43):
That looks at it with all the nuance and complexity of the Bible.
Because I think sometimes we take things out of context.
So we look at verses that say, not be anxious about anything.
And then the second we feel any kind of spike of anxiety, it's like, that's it, I don'thave faith.
or I'm singing against God because I experienced anxiety.
But I think I'm really learning to, you know, look at the Bible as a whole.
(17:06):
I'm reading Psalms at the moment and there's so much in there about anxiety, you know?
When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought me joy.
It's not that David didn't experience anxiety, it's that he was able to bring it to God.
So for me, faith is now being honest about my experience and then being authentic enoughto say, hey God, this is how I'm feeling, but...
(17:29):
I know that you are sovereign over everything.
I think that's always the arc of the Psalms is I'm gonna lay out everything that I'mfeeling right now, but I'm also going to remind myself and my soul within me that you are
sovereign and you are in control and I can trust your plan is good for me and that youmake all things work together for my good.
So I think for me now, faith is saying, okay, here's what I'm experiencing in thephysical, but let me now em place that under the authority of the spiritual.
(18:00):
That's really good.
That's really good.
Thank you for that.
uh You also say elsewhere in the book that an eating disorder is a mental illness withphysical effects.
So can you just explain what you mean by this?
Yes, so I think we can get the two muddled and we can look at eating disorders as aphysical illness alone and it's not as a mental illness first and then the physical is a
(18:32):
byproduct of what's happening in your mental state.
oh And the reason I think it's really important to differentiate between the two is thatagain, like I had a lot of shame around, oh, I'm not.
massively underweight, therefore I can't seek help or treatment.
Not realizing that the issue was the mental illness.
Like if I was mentally healthy, I wouldn't be in these cycles, these obsessive cycles.
(18:55):
If I was mentally healthy, I'd be able to go out with my friends.
I wouldn't be terrified of looking in a mirror, these kinds of things.
So it's like focusing first on what mental effects are you experiencing?
And then yes, some people gain weight, some people lose weight, some people stay the sameway, but that's not the important thing.
It's always uh the mental that needs to be tackled.
(19:20):
In the book, you dig into this, you've already mentioned the Psalms, which was reallyhelpful, but does the Bible have anything to say about mental illness?
Because I think one of the things in the book you were saying was,
when you first sort of thought about, well, you know, mental illness, must mean I'mfailing as a Christian.
(19:43):
The Bible doesn't really talk about mental illness.
So therefore it shouldn't, you know, if I have it, therefore I'm not doing very well.
um But what does the Bible have things to say about mental illness?
Yeah, I definitely think so.
And I think it took me a long time to realize this.
I think one of my key verses, and it's something that I mention a lot in the memoir, is,my grace is sufficient for you, for my powers made perfect in weakness.
(20:15):
And I think for me, that's been such a grounding verse because I'm going, oh, actually,not only is my weakness okay, but it's the place in which God's grace is sufficient.
So I don't need to hide, I'm having mental struggles because God's grace is bigger thanany mental struggle.
So I think for me that that verse has really stuck with me and stayed true.
(20:39):
And then another thing that I felt like I got revelation around was just how Jesusoperated and the different types of afflictions that he healed and was willing to heal.
And they weren't all physical.
Some of these, I mean, the language used would have been
you know, someone is demon possessed, right?
(21:00):
And so like in the book, I kind of talk about maybe the different levels on which we cansee that language.
So yes, there's the spiritual, but then there's also, you know, now no one would ever saysomeone's demon possessed uh in a more like secular Western society.
But you would use words like fighting or demons.
You would use words like they're losing the fight against this kind of mental illness,right?
(21:22):
And so when I see Jesus interact with these people who are demon possessed,
I see him healing mental illnesses.
He talks about saving a boy who would throw himself into the fire.
He talks about saving a man who lived in the tombs and would cut himself.
To me, that's a self-harmer, that's someone with depression, which is something I used toengage in as well.
(21:46):
For me, he was going around healing not only physical, but mental illnesses.
That's really interesting.
And we also get characters in the Bible, don't we, who have sort of signs of mentalillness.
I'm thinking of, is it Jonah after he was really cross because God actually saved the citythat he went to and then he went to depression and sat under this tree and sort of, you
(22:15):
know, just depressed.
And was it Elijah as well?
think he had moments of...
of depression running away from God and anxiety attacks and all sorts of things.
Yep.
Yeah, one of them is definitely saying something along the lines of, that's it, I'm done,just take my life now.
You know?
Yeah.
yeah, yeah.
I wish I was never born, all that kind of thing.
(22:36):
Yeah, and got had very different responses to both of them, think, depending on who theywere as an individual.
So I think also healing can be very individual.
Hmm, no that's a good point.
Just before we have a short break, could you share with our listeners some of the thingsthat you found helpful in overcoming your eating disorder?
(23:02):
Yes.
So the first thing I would say is just to keep trying because I really do believe that uhhealing is possible.
And just because you try one avenue and it doesn't work doesn't mean a different avenue isnot going to work.
For me, I think opening up about the eating disorder was really useful because the eatingdisorder had kept me so shrouded in shame that it wasn't until I started speaking about it
(23:29):
that some of that
those boundaries, kind of shackles were able to be released.
I think that honesty and authenticity with others and with God em is actually what enablesyou to start stepping into freedom.
I'm thinking of things like em the, I don't know what the word would be, like maybe themantra, the list that the alcoholics anonymous have.
(23:51):
And one of them is being honest with myself, with others and with God.
And I think that trifecta is so important.
uh And once you're honest with one, I think you can start being open to be honest withothers.
And then once you're open, you can start getting a support system around you that mightlook like uh treatment from an eating disorder specialist center, but it might also look
(24:14):
like therapy.
It might also look like um journaling, whatever that is, but think having a robust supportsystem around you.
And then one thing I always say, like at the beginning, especially of the journey, I thinkit's quite important to do.
is to make a commitment em and do that in a very physical, tangible way by maybe throwingaway items that have anchored you to a false identity of an eating disorder.
(24:38):
So a lot of people have apps installed on their phone, apps that track your weight lossand every calorie that you eat, delete the apps.
oh If it's social media accounts that you're following that are really triggering or booksor whatever that is, but I think that you know what,
those things are that you turn to to maybe trigger you or to enable you to do thesethings.
(25:02):
And I think throwing them away is useful.
One thing in the book that you mentioned was that when you were throwing things away, Ithink it was your parents bathroom scales.
Chuck those in the bin.
Oh, well, I've never seen any of them use the scales, so they're not going to miss them.
(25:23):
So into the bin they go.
Yeah, that was.
It got to that point I was like we need to make some drastic action here.
Yeah, yeah, that's good.
thank you.
That's really helpful.
That's really helpful.
We've been chatting with the author Nikki Intra all about her book Healing from Bulimiaand The Truth Shall Set You Free.
(25:43):
Now I'll be back chatting with Nikki more about her life and her faith just after these,so stay tuned.
God Whispers Our Life Changes, a book by Michael and Delaine Sulkeld, is an incredibletrue-life story of Michael and Delaine, an ordinary couple who listened as God led them
(26:05):
from joblessness to starting and growing a business, then into ministries that have takenthem from underprivileged neighbourhoods in the United States to rural villages and orphan
care in sub-Saharan Africa.
It is a story of life lessons by example.
of the elation and frustration in starting and growing a business interwoven withheartwarming and heartbreaking stories of serving in their community and abroad and how
(26:35):
God led the way in it all.
God Whispers are Life Changes by Michael and Delaine Sulkeld is described as a must readfor anyone looking for God's direction in serving others.
It is available now
from their website, GodWhispersForLife.com, as well as on other online retailers.
(26:59):
Do grab yourself a copy today.
If you enjoy listening to this podcast, you can help keep it on the web.
All you've got to do is buy me a coffee.
Head over to BuyMeACoffee.com slash Matt McChlery to make a donation.
There is a link in this episode's show notes.
So go on, buy me a coffee today and help this podcast
(27:21):
to keep supporting Christian books and authors.
Hi, welcome back to the Christian Book Blur podcast.
I've been chatting with author Nikki Inshera all about her book Healing from Bulimia andthe Truth Shall Set You Free.
We've had a great discussion all about the topics in the book before the break.
But on this side of the interval, Nikki, we like to, well, get to know the author a bit iswhat I usually say, but I think we've got to know you quite well already through what
(27:52):
we've been talking about.
But let's go for it.
you do for fun.
Yes, I am restarting to learn how to play piano.
That's been fun.
Yeah, it's really, fun.
I used to play as a child.
And then I stopped when I hit grade four.
I don't know if it's the same now, but grade four was the point where the theory startedto get really serious.
(28:17):
em And I, yeah, I was not very good at theory at all.
And I kind of stopped and I was never really practicing.
em But
I'm sort of just getting back into it for fun.
I'm learning how to play Bohemian Rhapsody at the moment.
We're halfway through.
Oh, wow.
Very fun.
Very exciting.
I was just about to say, have you gone right back to the very beginning, like do-re-mikind of stuff or...
(28:43):
Bohemian Rhapsody is pretty, serious stuff.
I know, I know.
mean, I'm playing, you know, my version of it.
I'm definitely not hitting every single part.
But yeah, I think just kind of learning how to enjoy hobbies again is fun.
I do a lot of dancing as well.
(29:04):
not at the same time as you play the piano
at the same time, I mean that would be cool.
That would be interesting.
Yeah.
That's the next challenge.
Yeah, no, really good.
um And what do you do?
You briefly mentioned that sort of what you do as a job or a career.
(29:25):
What are you involved in?
Yeah, so I'm actually a performer and a writer and a lecturer.
So I teach theatre and I teach uh playwriting and sort of creative writing, that sort ofthing.
And generally just help people tell stories is what I love to do.
Okay.
(29:45):
So storyteller in all sorts of different creative forms in a way.
Yeah.
Good.
I could see that that comes through in the book.
And is there a particular place on the planet that you really enjoy going to or visiting,or maybe you went there once on holiday and it was just fantastic.
(30:08):
Do you have somewhere special like that?
I am obsessed with Portugal.
I don't know what it is, but I love it.
Have you been?
No, not Portugal.
I've only been to like Portuguese restaurants, but I've actually been to the countryitself.
you should go because the food will be even better there, you know, so.
(30:28):
uh Yeah, I love it.
I don't know what it is.
I went there for a few years ago with a few friends.
And I think what it is that I really I love languages as well.
And I thought the language sound is so beautiful.
But the people were so welcoming.
And I left and I thought, okay, I need to learn Portuguese.
So I came back home, learned a bit of Portuguese, went and visited again, was able to havesome conversations with people.
(30:52):
Um, and i'm hopefully gonna go again next month actually
wow, wonderful.
When you say learn Portuguese, was it like using the Duolingo app or was yeah.
I was a Duolingo fiend for ages and that got me to a pretty decent level and then I gotbored of it and then I started listening to a few different podcasts.
(31:13):
I got myself to a, I would say a decent level and then I think I've fallen off it forquite a while now.
So I need to get my practice back on.
um Do you like hot drinks or cold drinks?
Hot drinks, I like tea.
I was gonna say, what's your go-to?
And is that, is that a normal sort of English breakfast or do you do sort of theseinfusions of, you know, like peppermint or green tea or...
(31:40):
You know what?
It's just a boring breakfast, builder's breakfast.
Yeah, that's it.
Does it have lots of sugar in it or no sugar?
oh
just the builder's breakfast and then some so I'm I'm a sort of a cheat vegan at themoment.
So I was vegan for quite a few years.
And that was something I didn't mention earlier that was sort of part of the eating sortof recovery journey.
(32:03):
uh And now I'm a bit more open and flexible, but I usually will just have like a soy milkor an almond milk because I prefer those milks now.
Okay.
Have you got any family?
I know we've talked about sort of relationships with parents and things in the lead up toyour story kicking off, but what about now?
Yeah, so I am, I'm the eldest of four children.
(32:25):
I've got three younger brothers.
I'm the only girl.
And we're all very close, which is lovely.
I went to see them this weekend, which was really nice.
Hadn't seen them in a while.
And I'm actually, this is a really interesting question because I'm actually on thejourney of reconnecting with a lot of family.
So when you were asking about places I like being, my other place that immediately came tomind was Ghana.
(32:50):
That's where my family are from.
Okay.
And I was able to travel to see some family I hadn't seen in decades a couple of yearsago.
And I think slowly those connections are being rebuilt.
So that's lovely to see.
lovely.
Yeah, that is great.
I'm, I'm from Zimbabwe myself originally.
An African connection there.
(33:14):
I did, well, like you, I did when I had family there.
Um, but all my sort of immediate family, have now left the country.
So I haven't been back in, in a long while, but there's, there's a few Zimbabwean familiesin my church actually.
Um, and they've been back fairly recently.
So.
I get little updates and snippets as to, you know, how things are going and that kind ofthing.
(33:38):
So yeah, that's good.
What is the Holy Spirit doing in your life at the moment?
Or has the Spirit put something on your heart that you're particularly thinking about orlearning about at the moment?
he is telling me to rest and I find that such a challenge.
(33:58):
I've got lots of podcast episodes about it, you know?
know.
Honestly, I need all the help I can get because every time I'm going to him and saying,okay, what next?
What next, Lord?
He's like, yeah, just rest.
Please give me something more tangible.
Yeah, I to run around.
I want something to do.
And he's just actually really telling me to take the time to rest in him.
(34:21):
So that's what I have to do.
So yeah, one particular episode, I think it's episode 40, it's called Understanding Restas Worship with a guy who's involved with like music and stuff called Sam Hargreaves.
And he's written a good book called The Rest is Worship.
That's the name of his book.
um And something that I learned from that, which I hadn't before, was he talked about thisthing called active rest.
(34:50):
Okay, yeah.
Rest doesn't just have to be sitting and doing nothing.
or sitting and watching Netflix, therefore I'm resting.
But you can just by doing something different that you don't normally do, can still giveyou that sense of rest and release, even though you're still doing.
(35:11):
It's like an active rest rather than just sitting and letting the world go by kind ofrest.
So that was interesting.
Anyway, there we go.
I thought I'd just drop that in there and a little bit.
40 if people...
are interested on the rest topic.
Have you got anything coming up soon?
(35:31):
Are you working on another book or project or, you know, it might not be a book, it mightbe something theatrical.
What are you working on at the moment?
So at the moment, I've just finished writing a script, actually, a screenplay, which is myfirst ever screenplay.
So I'm really excited about that.
I'm at the process of sharing it with some industry professionals and getting back lots offeedback and seeing what I want to tweak about it.
(35:57):
And I'm also, so this one is more, I'm thinking about it, but I would really love to seehow I can bring that into fruition at some point.
But I'm really interested in,
this concept of applying theology to um performance.
And specifically, I'm thinking about the theology of the actor's body.
(36:19):
how to, like, what does the Bible say about the body and how we can harness the body asworship?
And then how does that then translate to how actors are able to use their bodies?
So I think it's just this concept of combining everything I'm interested in, which islike,
bodies, body image, worship, and the arts.
(36:42):
Yeah.
I don't know when that's coming, but that's what I'm thinking.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
No, yeah, it's good.
It's a seed of an idea that's just starting to work its way through.
No, that's great.
Nikki, where can people find you to connect with you like social media or websites?
And more importantly, where can people buy your book Healing from Bulimia and the TruthShall Say?
(37:07):
Yes, so there's a few different places.
On Instagram, I've just recently started a new page called the Surrendered RecoveryProject.
No, the Surrendered Recovery Project.
And on there, there's updates about the book and also just some inspirational thoughts andinsights around body image just to help people through recovery.
(37:28):
I have a YouTube channel called Artist Archives, or lowercase, two words.
And you can find me on there usually talking about whatever creative project I'm on next.
And I have a new, quite a small, but a new, it's very exciting, a podcast called TheArtist Theology, which I can send a link to as well, uh talking about the relationship
(37:50):
between art and faith, because they're my two favorite topics.
And in terms of finding the book, it is available to purchase on Amazon, wherever youlive, really.
Wonderful.
So I'll pop a link to um your new Instagram page on the episode show notes so people canconnect with you and find out more about you um that way.
(38:17):
That just leaves you to say thank you so much, Nikki.
Thank you for your time.
Thank you for coming and speaking about your faith, your life, and your journey as well.
It's been a joy speaking to you today.
Thank you.
Thank you so much for having me, I loved it.
I just want to give a really big thank you to the sponsors of today's episode.
This is the book God Whispers Our Life Changes by Michael and Delaine Selkeld.
(38:41):
That book is available now from their website, GodWhispersForLife.com.
Do go and check it out.
And thanks also to you for listening to this episode of the Christian Book Blurb podcast.
Don't forget we come out on the first and the 15th of every month, so it will only be ashort few weeks.
before I'm back again speaking with another Christian author all about their books, theirlife and their faith.
(39:05):
So to encourage you in your discipleship one book at a time.
So do join me then.
I look forward to having the pleasure of your company really soon.
Thank you.
Goodbye.
Thanks for listening to Christian Book Blurb with your host, Matt McChlery.
Do give it a like, give it a share and let your friends know all about it.
(39:27):
We do hope to see you again soon.
on another Christian Book Blob.
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