HH: Ep. 8 - Scathing | DND404 - DND404 | Dungeons and Dragons Podcast

Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
Hello everybody, welcome to another session of the Hobeck
Humanitarians. I am your Dungeon master, Dan,
and join with me today are the other three monsters that I
believe I could beat in hand to hand combat, starting with a
yeah, yeah, yeah. Glitch.
Hello Glitch. Welcome.
Hi I'm glitch and I'm going to be playing calliope quill quiver
and I am pretty sure I could take out a mermaid or two in

(00:23):
combat that's. A hell yeah.
Nice. Yeah, yo, those memories don't
stand a chance. Right.
They can't run, they can't run after me, and then I'm gonna
give it over to Tony. Hello everybody.
My name is Tony. I'm playing somebody new today,
so if we're used to the old, well out with it because it's

(00:44):
same with the new. And a monster I could take in
hand to hand combat or any of those murderous dolls like
Chucky or, you know, puppet master, any of those.
I I punch every doll in the face.
What a silly concept that totally didn't frighten me for
an extended period my life. Do that as well and I believe
you could absolutely RIP apart some dolls.
Absolutely, absolutely. I drop kick Chucky in the face.

(01:06):
Give me the opportunity. What about you J Men?
I'm Jared and I'm going to be playing ECOM today and the
monster that I think I could take out, and I'm going to be a
little bit more specific from the movie Signs, those aliens.
I mean, you just water that. That's it.
Got it. Water.
Done, aliens. Specifically from signs the

(01:27):
Super. Soaker takes them out or.
The aliens from a World of Worlds.
We just sneeze on them. Yeah.
Right, Hello everybody. I am Dan again.
I'm your dungeon master and I think that I could beat up the
Pale Man, you know, because I'm not dumb enough to go in there

(01:48):
eating grapes that don't belong to me.
And if you don't eat nothing, it's just sitting there not
doing anything. So I would just take care of
that licky split. I got a Googling pale man.
What if there's cheese there? If there's cheese there, it's
going to be maybe a little harder for some people.
I think I could. Up the difficulty.

(02:10):
With the cheese if there's some snickerdoodles on my struggle.
This guy I. Could definitely scrap with this
dude. I'd eat his food and beat his
ass. If you've never seen Pan's
Labyrinth, one of the best. It's so good.
Foreign movies, if not movies ofall time.
I've actually never seen it. I just know that scene, but I've
never seen it. Go watch it Tony, you will love
it. But got something else?

(02:32):
No, I, I, I beat this guy up. But without further ado, you
know the deal. It is time for the rundown.
And today's rundown is going to be about the YouTube.
That's right, because on YouTubewe have definitely some more
videos up now, more than we've ever had before.
We're posting more because Tony and I've gotten to a pretty good

(02:54):
schedule now and it gives me more time to create videos.
So those are coming back. So go on YouTube and go check
out those fun videos and maybe, hopefully that'll maybe inspire
Tony to make a video or two. Totally have.
They're already up by the time this airs for sure.
And Jared, too, right? Yeah, yeah, Dan, where can they
find it? Yes, go on to YouTube.

(03:16):
You're going to type DND four O 4 in the search bar.
It should be one of the first things that comes up.
You type DND four O 4 podcast. Maybe I'll just put the link
down below. There's probably a link down
below that's probably easier, but I hope you go visit that
link. But until then, I hope you enjoy
another episode of Holbeck Humanitarians.
Hit it, Bard. O.

(03:41):
NOTD i.e. don't die. HULLBECK.
Let's go. Walking through the streets and
I'm feeling OK. Drunk with special guests and
I'm sure they'll be just fine. Hold back, humanitarians.
It's their time to shine. To shine.
That's right. Yeah, Browning orange leaf

(04:04):
detaches itself from a tree and floats elegantly down onto the
cobblestone streets of Holbeck. Wind blows softly through the
trees as green leaves turn into vibrant yellows, violets and
Reds. The autumn months are upon us
here in Holbeck and on this nippy, breezy day, the mayor can
be seen giving a speech to a small crowd of humanitarians and

(04:25):
onlookers. It is on this fine day that I
recognize a member of Juan Schonsen's Junior Reformers and
promote them to a true reformer position in great acts of

(04:45):
intelligence and bravery in the face of certain death.
This man stood up to the shattered ones.
I, Frederick Figlshenk, hereby acknowledge that Riggs.
Of the College of Valor. Is now a reformer?
What? Tony, please describe your

(05:08):
character as you walk onto the. Podium as I wave modestly,
smirking all around a little little foe of myself you see
before you, a half monkey half man with really, really, really
comically big ears. He's wearing brown leather
armor. He has a short sword at his side

(05:28):
and a a whole bindle of daggers.He's wearing leather armor.
He has brown hair. He looks more human than monkey.
You see that he could be have possibly been inflicted with
something, but his name is Riggs.
It's like, yes, thank you everybody.
I do appreciate your applause ofencouragement.
Yes, it is quite indeed a great feat to be here today.

(05:49):
And I do appreciate your applause.
It just gives me it just gives me more inspiration to to help
this faithful town and the town I now call home.
Woo, you deserve a rigs. Let's go.
Rigs, rigs, rigs, rigs. As everybody begins to cheer you
on, townsfolk clap as you finishyour speech and after shaking
hands and making small talk with, you know, some of the

(06:12):
higher rank officials, Juan Johnson pulls you aside.
Hey, come over here, Riggs. It's it's really great to have
you. You've been doing great work
here. Of course, Catherine, I'm I'm
glad to be a part of the team formally now.
Absolutely. And of course now that you're
part of the reformers, you get apartner, a partner in crime.
If he could say we don't commit crime, we don't commit crime.

(06:34):
Absolutely not. This is your new partner E com
Jared. Please describe your character
as you step forward. E com steps forward.
He is a wood elf monk, he's level 7.
He has dark hair. He has his normal monk get up
going on and he is very upset atwhat just happened with a very

(06:55):
frustrated look on his face. It's a pleasure to meet you E
com I can't wait to hit the streets and I really bring
justice to light here and I holdout my monkey palm to him to
shake his hand. I shake his hand and then
quickly look at Juan Johnson andjust like, OK, what's going on
here? You know how many times I've
saved this town? Yeah, of course.

(07:16):
You've done a great job. I pull up my badge.
What's up with this? Can we start talking about, you
know, promotions? At what point do I start getting
paid for this, by the way? Well, first of all, you do get
paid. You get paid.
Have you not been picking up your paycheck cut to a locker

(07:37):
with just like, stuffed with gold to the brim that hasn't
been checked in months? Where I live.
I didn't thought that was my mailbox.
It's been empty this whole time.No, you have a designated
locker. Listen, we'll talk about this
later. You 2 get acquainted Econ, maybe
you can show rigs around. He's a little newer than you,
but you have been here a bit longer.

(07:57):
Newer so I have more experience,which means he should show me
around. This is what you're trying to
say, right? Because he's he's higher up.
I have more experience. No, you're the same.
You're both performers. We're partners.
OK. I put my I put my arm around
around ECOM. I kind of put a little bit of my
weight on him. Really like trying to hold

(08:20):
myself up on his on his body. We're gonna become best pals.
I'm gonna have your back. You're gonna have mine.
It's gonna be a great time. Then after acquaintancing
yourself with your new partner, the mayor, well, it's up to you.
Excuse me, Phyllis Johnson. Great, great night we had last
night. Oh man, I barely remember it.
Anyways, I do have a small request.

(08:42):
There is a dispute between two of the town factioners that I
must attend to. If it wouldn't be so much to
ask, could you please show my niece around Holbeck?
That would be wonderful. And with that being said, he
steps aside to introduce you to Calliope Quilquither.

(09:03):
I believe you pronounce it GlitzMama.
Would you please describe your character?
How do you say this thing? What is it?
Calliope. Hello I.
Kawaii. Hang on, I gotta.
I gotta. Like sound it out.
Hang on, Cal. Calliope.
Calliope. Yes.

(09:24):
So Kelly, hopefully these two can show year round.
Oh my gosh. Hi guys, It's so nice to meet
you. I'm calliope this place is it's
it's there's it's really great. It's really great.
There's there's there's like a lot of of textures here.
This is great. It's so lovely to meet you.
Do you recognize me? Do you?

(09:44):
I'm so sorry. This must be weird for you to
meet a celebrity. I'm, I'm, I just have to say I'm
speechless. I'm so starstruck.
I just, I've never been in the presence of a celebrity before,
let alone guard duty, a possiblebodyguard, but.
Oh, so you have read my article?You may call me a bodyguide as I
we show you around town and I extend my hand for a handshake.
Oh, that's so lovely. That's so love.

(10:05):
It's so lovely to meet you. So you've read my articles, My
lifestyle column. History check.
No, no, you've never these columns.
Deception. Did you say I have?
Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Roll me Deception check against
Kelly's perception check. Wow, first.

(10:30):
Roll net 20. So.
I have read all of your articles.
I'm especially fond of the ones the way that you have 100 uses
for pears, apples and pineapplesIt is.
Oh. My gosh I love that one.
That one was like one of my favorite.
Was so close to my heart. You guessed perfectly ecom.
Did you know that it's so good for your pores?

(10:52):
It it does wonders really. It really helps exfoliate the
body, especially when you have alot of hair on you.
You really need to to to really let it grow through to get the
Sheen out. Ecom is just sweating at this
point is just like, so yeah, just absolutely sweating.
And it's taken one or two steps back and it's just like, what's

(11:17):
Watson? Are you like, I mean, is there
something else we could do? Like I'll go find a dragon.
I'll like. What else have we got?
I'm sure you'll get into troubleand you know you'll do what you
need to do today. You will be fine.
All right, Mayor, let's go figure out what's going on with
those factors, huh? Yes, of course, The factors,
right? And they meander off.

(11:38):
As they meander off I go, I lookat ecom and I give them like a
little drinking sign like they're.
Yeah. He shakes his head, finally.
Callie, did you roll a perception check?
No, I figured it was going to beless than a Nat one.
OK. Just for story stuff.
That is a 2. Yeah, you, you noticed that ECOM

(12:01):
is very nervous, but you don't know why he's nervous.
In fact, you start to kind of talk yourself up and you're
like, oh, he's probably nervous because he's around someone
super famous and so beautiful and elegant and he's never seen
someone like so exquisite. Very new to everyone.
She's going to give his hand like a little squeeze.

(12:24):
You come literally dies inside he.
Turns to stone for a second. Hits the ground.
So how this is going to work as you show her around town is
we're going to do 2 things. You're going to show her one of
your favorite food places and you're also going to show her
one of your favorite parks. We'll start with the food.
You all can decide together if you would like to go to Drippy

(12:46):
Pot Coffee or Calm Creature Cafe.
All right, let me show you guys.Drippy Pot has some of the best.
Come on, this way. We got teas, we got everything.
Definitely need to pick me up. Kelly Opie, please.
After you. Oh.
Thank you so much. And as you go in to Drippy Pot
Coffee, you see that it is a pretty humble coffee shop.
There may be 6 tables in here. They're all made of wood, but

(13:08):
they are trimmed with copper on the sides and they are stained
very nicely. And you do see a barista behind
the counter and just one helper that is, you know, helping out
with dishes and giving people their food and all that kind of
stuff. I would like to go up to the
counter and be like, give me thehardest stuff you got.

(13:28):
Oh, yes. Hi.
It's nice to see you come. As Caldwell greets you.
I hope you've been enjoying my coffee.
I'm glad to see her coming back.And it's a shame my best
customer's not here anymore. I miss your partner.
Where's he off to? You know that church to the
north with the dragon? He he got real upset about that
one blowing up last time, yes. Of course, that was pretty

(13:51):
tragic. I I mean if my cafe or to
explode, I don't know what I do.Yeah, yeah, same thing with him.
He, you know, he loves that thatold statue put a lot of money
into it. Sorry, is there a chance it
might explode? I mean, you just said that kind
of out out. Should I be concerned?
Oh no, of course not. On a small part of town here and

(14:12):
it's likely to explode. It it already had exploded like
your articles in the past. I don't even know what's
happening and I know that was a good one.
Well, you know what they say, coffee first.
Just a second. Well, I'll take a, I'll take
what E com is having. He seems to know the right stuff
to pick. So he does give you a menu to

(14:33):
peruse but he looks at E com Here are menus of course one for
the new folk. I haven't seen you 2 in here
before. Take a take a look just in case
and I'll give you an abyssal since you want something strong
and he gives you it's just a cupof like black coffee, nothing in
it, you know, just kind of meantto get you wired.
But this is, you know, it's compressed by magic.
They use some sort of magic to compress it and condense the the

(14:57):
coffee. Everybody you can buy an abyssal
coffee. There is something called
scorched, which is a coffee steamed with milk and magic.
There is something called goldenbrown.
You can get a golden brown, which is coffee blended with
butter and oil. There are muffins, Crescent
rolls. You can get corn, lemon or
banana muffins and egg sandwiches.

(15:19):
I'll take a golden brown, please.
All right, a golden brown for you.
Most people don't know that butter and oil can actually
create quite an exquisite taste.Oh, I bet.
And for the lady what? What will you have?
Do you? Have like a caramel ribbon
Fireball Frappuccino, no. A caramel ribbon.
What does ribbon? Know what?
I am so sorry, sweetie. You know what I'm just gonna

(15:41):
have? I'm gonna have what he's having.
That is great. That'll be great.
Thank you so much. Certainly, but if you want
something sweeter, I'd suggest the Scorched.
It's got steamed milk. Oh, let's do that one then.
That's so nice of you. Thank you all.
Right. And you see that he's a little
magical and he has this kind of like, almost like this long
metal straw that he flicks with magic and it steams up the milk.

(16:02):
And he goes about making your coffees.
The waitress comes over and she's like, hello, how are you?
Could I get your orders? Would you like something to eat
or are you just sticking with coffee today?
What kind of eggs is your egg sandwich?
We're talking Cogatrice eggs, We're talking.
Chicken eggs. We're talking.
Well, you can have duck eggs, you can have chicken eggs.
We don't do anything exquisite here when it comes to those.

(16:24):
We keep it in the duck and the chicken variety.
Let's take a duck egg. Duck egg sandwich.
OK, egg sandwich for you. Great.
And the lady? What for you?
I would like 2 chicken egg sandwiches.
All right, two chicken eggs. Actually make it 3.
I'm super hungry. Would you like a banana muffin?
They're new on the menu. That is such a good idea.

(16:46):
You were so wonderful. Yes, please.
Absolutely. It comes with this gold trimmed
plate that kind of matches the beautiful color of your hair.
What I say? Oh my gosh, look at this gold.
This is so cool. I love this place, it's so
authentic. And she hands you a banana
muffin and egg sandwiches and looks at you E com.

(17:08):
E com it's nice. To see you, you're looking well,
you're looking stronger than normal.
Yeah, yeah, real strong. Been a lot of fights recently.
She kind of like puts her hand on your shoulder.
Your shoulders are looking broader.
And he gets real, like just stiff and starts slinking away.
He's like, thanks and yeah, I'm good.

(17:30):
I'll just take another one of these copies and.
And the usual Crescent roll. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's great. I'll take it to go.
Yeah, you always seem to keep itsimple, but you always get the
job done. So I appreciate all the work you
do for us. Thanks.
Appreciate. She walks away and gets the
order. So anyways.
Riggs, you're going to roll me two D 20s, E com 2 D 20s and

(17:52):
Cali 4 D 20s is all the stuff you got.
We'll start with E com. 11 and a1511.
And a 15. Your coffee is fine.
Cool. You know, there's nothing.
That's what I wanted very special about it.
But it does a job in the same thing with your Crescent roll.
They they did an average job with it.
You know, a good job. Normal Riggs.
What'd you get? I got an 11 and an 18.

(18:13):
Oh so the coffee is fine? It's nothing special to you, but
the egg sandwich you got was prepared very well and you are
going to get double what you would normally get.
So you normally would roll 2D6 for some temp HP.
You're going to roll 4D6 with anegg sandwich with a Crescent
roll. Please roll me one D6 ECOM.

(18:36):
Can I re roll egg up? No more ones?
I got 1/2. Excuse me?
Wow. Not re roll what?
That's crazy bogus. Wow. 1D6 temp HP for the
Crescent roll ECOM and. You roll up five, we're going to

(18:57):
be so. I get 1D6.
Yeah, OK, so roll 1D6. And the egg sandwiches are going
to counteract and overwrite any of the temp HP you get, even
though we had a muffin and two egg sandwiches.
Just roll me. Oh wait.
First, tell me all the D20 rollsyou got.
An 18. A nine, A7 and A-17.
Yes, the coffee is scrumptious. You are like what kind of milk

(19:23):
did they use and what kind of magic did they use on this to
make it so sweet? And what happens with your
coffee that you got the scorchedFor the next 4 hours?
Normally you can use the dash action as a bonus action, but
now for the next 8 hours, you'llbe using the dash action as a
bonus action because you got such a good coffee.
And then the egg sandwiches, youdid roll good on the egg

(19:47):
sandwiches, so you'll also get the 4D6 temporary hit points and
then while you rolled those, theabyssal coffee.
By the way, E com, I don't know if it's going to help you out
too much, but it's concentrated coffee pressurized with magic.
For the next 4 hours, you have advantage.
Oh no, this will help you. Actually, you already have this.
You have advantage on initiativerolls.

(20:08):
Oh, OK, wait, I don't already have that you.
Don't already have that, and that's really good.
I got 1 temporary hit point and advantage on initiative rules.
Got it. Thank you.
Yes and Tony for your golden brown you have advantage for the
next 4 hours on any concentration check or until you
fail a concentration check. If you would fail it, you lose
the benefit and you take note, Callie of what's good, what's

(20:32):
not good as they give you your meals and you can maybe talk
amongst yourselves as you prepare to go to your next
location you. Guys, this coffee is amazing.
And I'm like just it's also the name of it for now, end leader.
As I continue to sit my golden brim.
I just I just get real obnoxious.

(20:53):
E com does a hide action after that.
Golivy just starts scribbling inher notebook.
And as you take notes and you talk amongst some of the guests
that come in and thank you for your service rigs and E com, you
get ready to go after eating andcleaning up and you head on to

(21:14):
your favorite park. The parks that you can go to
that you can decide together. You can go to Lantern Landing,
which is a lakeside park, or youcould go to Blossom Brook, which
is a park just on the outskirts,kind of tucked into the woods.
You seem like a guy of nature. What do you think is the most
beautiful park that whole back has to offer?
Oh well, the furthest one from the city is probably and I look

(21:35):
over to the side and they're both equal.
Are they both equally far? Yeah, they're equally far.
I would say it depends if you'rein touch with, you know, you
want to see some great flowers and floral Blossom Brook sounds
great or you know, Lantern Landing, it's pretty great.
I think it's up to you. 2 Rock paper scissors.

(21:57):
I was just going to say rock, paper, scissors.
All right, rock paper, scissors it is, and I go to play, but I
want to purposely lose. In in this we'll call it Bear
Hunter Ninja. Bear Hunter, Ninja.
If you want to purposefully lose, that's going to just be a
deception check just to see if she understands that you're
losing. That's not going to be difficult
to lose on purpose though. 22. Jesus.

(22:21):
So good full perception check and see if you know that he's
losing on purpose. That is another 2.
Again. Best of seven, you are good.
It's like I read your mind and Icould like just, I could see it
coming. I'm just, you know, I could
like, feel it. She's so smart, witty, a great

(22:42):
writer and a sciatic Oh my God, Oh my God, just like now, Oh my
God, it's Ecom. So, Callie, before you came
here, you did a little bit of research and you know, both of
these parks, it's up to you which one you want to go to.
You know that Blossom Brook has a flower garden and it is kind
of tucked into the woods. And you know that Lantern
Landing has fine carved stone, and it's this flat platform

(23:04):
overlooking the lake. Let's go to Lantern Landing.
Make your way to the South goingtowards the Lake Shore and
eventually hike your way up to aRidge that looks over the lake.
This is the lakeside ledge that has been flattened out with fine
stone walkways and benches. There are glowing crystal
lanterns around the park that attract glow bugs and some say

(23:25):
friendly spirits. This has the best view over the
lake stone gazebo with a drinking well.
Public apple trees and handmade streams can be seen flowing
through the park as kids race stick boats with their friends.
So you can just like, pick apples off the trees and eat
them. You can just like they're like
for anyone. You see a dad holding his kid up

(23:47):
to like pick one of the apples and the kids laughing.
You guys, you could just pick apples off the trees here and
like nobody cares. That's crazy.
And she runs over and starts just picking apples and shoving
them into her pockets. Some people do give you weird
looks because you're taking so many, but they're like OK.
Take as many as you like, it's free.
It's probably because I'm famous.
That's it. That's definitely it.

(24:10):
That's awesome. As you are kind of walking
around showing her the park, allthree, many of you will each
roll me AD 20. Just a flat D20.
I rolled a me. 4. 16. I'm going to roll AD 4 to see
who they go up to. All right, Hallie, this little
boy comes up to you, this littleelf boy, and he's like.
Excuse me, miss. And he's kind of tugging on your

(24:34):
pants. Oh my gosh.
Hi. Hi.
What can I do for you? Hi, will you play?
Would you play? And he kind of looks back at his
mom, who's like, go, go, would you play stick race with me?
Yes. 1000 times, yes. Yes, yes.
And you can tell us an awkward kid probably doesn't have a lot

(24:57):
of friends. So his moms encourage him to
just, you know, go around the park and and try and, you know,
just talk to people. He's like, OK, you make we make
there's there's stick piles in the center and we can make it.
We can make boats and we'll see which goes fastest down down the
the rivers. And it's kind of cute that he's
calling these little streams rivers, these little man made

(25:19):
streams. And what you're going to do
since you decided to say yes, isyou were going to roll me a
sleight of hand. Check to see how good your boat
is. 6 good with the the words. Maybe not so much at crafts.
This sad little stick boat. Yeah, what does your sad little
stick boat look like for those sticks?
There's like a bunch of little twigs just like sticking out at

(25:41):
all different directions and like, it's maybe not quite as
good as the small child's boat that he's probably pretty good
at. Just like how did they do like
that? Looks really cool.
OK, we're gonna put it here and I'm gonna say three on three.
We go and he counts you down 123and you let go and chase after

(26:03):
these boats with a kid. Since you didn't do great on
this line of hand check, you're just going to roll me one D20
and you're going to tell me whatyou get.
And it's just a luck check to see if your boat beats his boat.
I bet you 2 gold that she pulls us out right as I lean on ecom
this. Is another six or no?
Sorry, it's another four. That is another 4.
Another four as as you say this and then turn back.

(26:26):
Her boat's gone. ECOM.
You saw her boat sink about halfway to the finish line.
I'd take you on that bet. Man.
Oh, you're a betting man. You you can see further through
the future. I can Well, but it's a bet and I
said that Palmum 2 gold and whenI do that, I'm giving him biotic

(26:47):
inspiration. Nice.
What's your part of inspiration look like, Tony?
I say Palma to him. I look over and she like looks
at the gold and looks at me and I just kind of give him a wing
be like oh man this foresight talk about 5 sight am I right?
Just I just like kind of I just kind of like gassed him up a
little bit. As I slip him the money.
I take a bite of the apple. OK, thank you.

(27:08):
That was really fun. I'm gonna go home now, but maybe
I'll see you here again. We're so good at boats.
What is your name? Thank you.
Let's be best friends. My name's Poole.
He's like Paul, but like, like wool put together.
It's so nice to meet you Poole. Let's race boats again sometime.
Thank you. Bye.
Bye. And he leaves and you get a

(27:30):
heroic die die of inspiration hecan take with you as you play
boats. And you're now inspired by this
little child. What?
What does that mean? On your character sheet you'll
see the heroic inspiration in between your health and your
speed. Just click that and then it
means once on this day you get to re roll any die if you don't
like the role. As the kid walks away, ECOM just

(27:52):
feels like he wasn't prepared tosee all that.
An awkward kid all of a sudden overcoming his fears.
It resonated a little too much with him and he he has to turn
away. If a kid can do it, maybe.
I can do it. Maybe today's the day.
Maybe today's I'm going to, I'm going to not be awkward.

(28:14):
It's going to be great. And then as you turn around,
you're almost face to face with Cali as she's now back with you
guys. OK, today's not the day.
Today's not the day. Cali, you're so great with kids.
Oh, thank you. I kind of feel like it's just
because I really like, I like toplay with like, well, it's
apparently it's so much fun. It's so, it's so real.

(28:35):
It's so real. I guess I'm seeing how awkward E
com is around women at this point and I just like I'm like,
it is is it an ecom And I just like kind of nudge him over to
like interjected the conversation.
He he just has a dead stare and just nods his whole body.
I just can't imagine you having any enemies.

(28:56):
I, I mean, I hope not. I try to just, you know, spread
positivity around me and, and just kind of lift up all the
situations that I'm in. You know what they say?
You know, positivity is like butter.
It's very easy to spread. Oh.
My gosh, that is such a good saying.
And she starts writing it down. I'm putting you in the book with

(29:16):
my Nana because Nanobriowell always said something exactly
like that, and I'm definitely putting that right next to it.
Ecom's jealous about being in the book I want to be.
In the book. Ecom really wants to be in this
book. He starts thinking of phrases he
can say all throughout the day. I can't wait till we start
fighting something today. I have.

(29:38):
So many good phrases I. Have so many good fight phrases.
I think Kelly would be like, do you want an apple?
Are you OK? And like, hand him an apple.
Yeah, just toss it to me. I'll catch it.
And as she throws it, he misses.You forget that your body has to
move and you're still staring asit just hits your chest and
falls down as you meander, some more awkwardly than others, out

(30:03):
of the park. You find your way back through
the town and as the afternoon begins to come and it's kind of
getting closer to lunchtime, allof a sudden you hear a cry of
help as someone is yelling through the town.
Help help please somebody help me.

(30:24):
He comes Spritz into action. Where?
What? What's wrong?
Oh, come here, be quick, quick, quick.
He's on the move. He's on the move.
We have to see him in action. I'm coming, I'm coming.
I'm coming. I see her along like.
And as you move along, you see that some people are ignoring
this man. In fact, everyone is ignoring
this man who is thin in the face.

(30:44):
It's got some very fancy kind ofchic robes and is running
through the streets frantically looking for help.
Somebody please, anybody. Right here.
What? What's wrong?
What you got? Yes, Sir.
OK. You see, I've been travelling
for days and I finally made it to your humble town.

(31:05):
I heard. In fact, I know that there's an
abandoned house here with an item that can heal my dying
grandmother, but as I came into town, I was robbed.
Robbed. Broad daylight.

(31:27):
He's inconsolable. But wait, you know where the
this abandoned houses they couldsave we we worry about the
robbery later. Right, the houses, but it's it's
booby trapped in this magic and all the items I brought to get
in were stolen. One of them went to the north
and went towards the woods, one of them went to the east and

(31:50):
went towards the shops and the other went to the West.
I'm not sure where he went. I can't be anywhere.
He comes all of a sudden, like, wait a minute, I've been here
before. I just need you to find them,
please. And you can take this in any
order you want. But he's he tells you after you
console him and you kind of get the gist of what's going on,

(32:12):
that these bandits split up to try and get away and meet up
maybe somewhere else. And he tells you that they took
these items that he needs to getinto this abandoned place and
that there's this orb. There's this magical orb that'll
negate any bad magic when you goin there.
And there's this eyeglass that is key to discovering how to

(32:33):
safely maneuver around this place.
And then he also tells you there's a key to open the chest
that has this magical elixir that will save his grandmother.
Like are we in a rush to hit each one?
Like can we do each one separately?
You think you should move quickly, but you don't think
it's going to be too much of A rush.
You just need to know. You just know.
You should probably talk to the townsfolk when you get into the
western part of town. The eastern part of town, the

(32:54):
northern part of town. See what's going on.
OK. I was just kind of curious if it
was like a like we need to hurryand get these and split up or if
it's more of like we could go. No, you can all you can all go
together without worrying too much and everybody can give me a
history check. Dirty 20. 21 Hey. 79 ECOM This
sounds pretty wild, Rags and Calliope.

(33:15):
You know, from the research you did before coming to town
because you were looking up all the occult lore and all the
crazy things that happens in this humble little town.
You know, of this magic story that the parents tell, the kids
hear about this elixir of life that the great heroes of Holbeck
used to protect. It's one of the reasons they
created Holbeck to protect this elixir and that they think

(33:36):
there's one of the abandoned houses probably has it.
And Riggs, you know that this isa story commonly told here, and
you've been here for maybe abouta month, you know, and it's
something that's come up before,you know, when you're going out
drinking with some of the juniorreformers, getting to know them
at the Taverns. So wait, I'm not sure it's
actually real or not. It's just like the foundation

(33:57):
of. The yeah, you're not sure it's
real, but this guy definitely thinks it is.
I like to make an insight check on the guy, kind of checking for
alcohol. Really be like.
Listen, you don't need to like. Oh yeah, check for alcohol.
You just don't need to lie to me.
Oh sorry, I need to roll the insight check.
I'm doing insights. Now, no, there it is, my blunder
that's in that one. Oh.

(34:19):
You, I mean, you don't smell alcohol.
There's no alcohol in this guy. But he's very frantic and very
frazzled and crying and nearly unconcilable.
But better now. You guys have, now there are
people helping him. He's a little better.
He's kind of getting back on hisfeet.
So why don't you? OK.
Golden the droopy brew. Why don't you get yourself a
nice golden brown By the time you're done with that cup, we'll

(34:42):
retrieve those items for you andthen keep the situation and go
back with some good news. My name is Steve Harmon.
Steve Harmon. I will go, maybe get a drink and
calm down and I will meet you atthe Manor.
Okay, I'll meet you at the abandoned Manor.
And he gives you a location on the outskirts of town.
It's just one of the abandoned houses, you know, that is kind

(35:05):
of close to the lake. I hope you taking notes.
This is a real investigation. It will go great in one of your
letters. I am taking notes and her quilt
pops up next to her and she starts writing.
So that being said, which direction do you 3 want to
travel first? N to the forest.
West is the more elegant part oftown with the shops, and the
east is going to be a little more rundown, kind of like the

(35:26):
nautical district. If I know one thing I think we
should start and then I can I doa history check on the town to
see if there's more, if there's more crime in one section of the
of one of the towns. Yeah, you, you know, there's
going to be slightly more crime in the East.
All right. So ECOM, knowing that, I think
we start with the East East where usually the crime is.

(35:48):
Do some real time interrogation and I my fist, it's my palm.
And ECOM is on a mission. We're going east.
You head to the east and this place is a little more rundown.
You know, there's not as much upkeep.
Some of the statues are crumbling a little in this side
of town. It's kind of intertwined with

(36:10):
the nautical district from the South, so you get some of those
people here as well. And as you make it to the east,
everybody can give me perceptionchecks.
Cheesy. Easy. 15. 16-8 yeah, you're
taking notes on the structures and not really paying attention
to anything else. Here very busy writing.

(36:31):
Riggs, you notice someone shady looking left and right coming
out of a shop. I elbow E com and I give two
fingers to my eyes and points tothe shady fellow walking out of
the shop. Does he?
Does shady guys see us? Not yet.
And we sneak up and grab him. You could.
OK, I want to do that, so we give the guy a chat.
Are you all going at the same time or are you sending an ecom?

(36:53):
How you doing that? I I tell him I'm one with the
shadows. I got this.
All right, ECOM, give me a stealth roll.
A13 Not really with the shadows,but you know, it's daytime.
He's trying to. It's good enough as you I give.
Him the help action as I try to make some noise.
Wait, I have bardic inspiration.Again, it's good enough.

(37:17):
I. Just want to, you know, it's for
Ecom's, you know, mental. You can really succeed it, you
know. He really needs a win here.
Wait, use your bardic. Inspiration.
He doesn't need to use his bardic inspiration.
This guy's got terrible stats. Calliope is not paying attention
and she is writing in her book and may have walked into a
planter a few times. Look.
Handbound, that's. So.

(37:39):
Elegant as this guy begins to shift away and just as he's
about to run, you trip him and then immediately grab his hands
and kind of flip him over and high up his hands.
What are you doing to me? Who is that?
What? What's going on?
I come over and help. Get off of me.
I'm looking for an eyeglass, a crystal ball and a brass key.
And I got a feeling, you know about it.

(38:01):
And I get, I try to intimidate him.
Yeah. Give me an intimidation check
with advantage. It sounded way cool, but I don't
have really good take it out of five, I don't.
Draw with advantage. No, I got A8.
Look, he's not very good at it, OK?
He's trying. You want to use your bardic.
Yes, because I can hopefully A10.

(38:24):
Barely. He at first he's like, go after
yourself good. And then he sees Riggs.
He's like, all right, I sold it.What?
Who'd you sell to? So I just I just sold it in the
pawn shop, OK. In this building right here.
Wherever this place is, well. We're going to go buy back.
How much money did you make off that, Huh, Huh.
And I go to like, pad him up. I try to, like, look to see what

(38:45):
he has in his pocket. Oh, scumbag, huh?
It's. Cool.
Oh, why you think I can't just teleport my magic back on my
own? Please, you're not the magical
type. Give me a perception check or an
inside check I guess. Yeah, inside.
Check Dirty 20. Wow.
You beat him by like 2 he he's clearly lying that he can do

(39:06):
magic. Maybe magic tricks and I like
look in I pull out like a some stupid items that he has this
bug and some dust bunnies and doI find like his money bag.
Yeah, you find his money bag andthere's 50 gold in there.
The gold, huh? Well, I'm sorry, what item did
he sell? He didn't tell you yet.
What item is it? It's just some stupid.

(39:27):
Monocle. OK, I I don't need a freaking
monocle, OK? Well, maybe you should have held
on to it so you can see us coming, huh?
And I like lift them up and I try to like, handcuff them some
rope. Listen, you can have it back.
You just let me go. I just, I just need money.
We don't. Not a lot to eat around here.
It's a little hard making money these days.
Oh, you need something to eat? OK, well here I give you an
idea. I know when I've got E com I'm

(39:49):
sorry I won't. I promise I won't do it again.
For food, is he going to give itback to us?
He. Gave you the money back so you
have the money back. So we have the money, but we
just have to go get the glass. OK, so for food I go to call IP.
Is it call? Calliope.
Calliope you know those apples. Yeah, I was having right here.

(40:10):
I already have two I was going to give to him.
She's like shoves 2 and then like 3 more out of her pockets.
So like 5 apples all of a suddenin your arms?
You know there's a whole park where you can pluck these for
free. There is I know and we Does he
know about that? Does he know?
Because I. Should know about that.
And he kind of look glares at the the guy.

(40:31):
I listen, we got, I got one morequestion for you, all right?
You don't have to like me. Just don't lie to me.
You can't lie to justice. You got me.
OK. What?
There was a string of robberies and you fit the description for
one of them. I'm sure you have some
colleagues. You want to give me some
information on that? Yeah, one of them took the
crystal ball to the West and onewanted to go to his hideout in
the woods. Is there a specific reason that

(40:52):
you all the three of you split up or you just have different
homes, different hovels when rocks you crawl under?
We're just trying to make a living here.
I'm done with it though. I promise I'm done.
Yeah, I'm. Doing it like I want to see.
You with your insight check. You already know Riggs, that
he's a common thief. He's not anything special.

(41:13):
He's just like trying to do it. I just don't know.
If he's going to do it again. With your insight check, you
know he's not going to do it again.
He's like, shit, this is I'm notdoing this again.
A whole lot of man. Here's what I'm going to do for
you, OK? You give us some very important
information and that gets rewarded.
OK. OK, I'm going to write you a
ticket for some community service around town.
Lucky for you, they serve lunch.Wait for those that serve at

(41:33):
least six hours. For real, I've been I haven't
been able to get into those. That's actually a huge help.
That's what we're here to do. And I give like a winkle with
the calipede, like, like, look how helpful we are.
Wow, we're doing such a great job.
They tell us to come to you guys, but I it's hard believing
you sometimes, you know, I heardpeople like die with you guys,
like die like. Look at ecom.
I'm sorry. What?

(41:56):
Ecom is just looking what his brave it's.
Just a rumor. I know rumors are bad blah blah
blah blah blah. But.
Hey, you know what? You're free to go.
You know what? You've got all the information I
pushed. I got the receipt and his
yelling trails off as Econ brings him away.

(42:16):
Well, I think we got some good information.
That was weird that that guy said you guys a lot of people
die. That was super weird, right?
That was very strange. So I don't, I don't know what
he. Was so weird.
Is death commenting on humanitarians?
Hey, so you know what, I got themoney.
Let's let's go inside and totally change the subject.
You had inside and into Hemwick's hobbies Homestead, OH.

(42:41):
My God. When you walk into this pawn
shop of swords, you see that there are shelves everywhere
with odds and ends being overprotected behind magical
barriers. There's a short a short dwarven
woman with red hair, overalls and sit all over her face and
clothes. You can see her tinkering with
the hilt of some sort. Short sword.

(43:02):
I give the the money to Cal Cal.Let's just we can just go with
Cali from now on. I'm trying to be true to the
characters you. Know what she likes?
You. Guys.
So callie's like super chill. Oh, she's chill like that.
Why don't you take this one and I give her the the money to to

(43:26):
try to get back the eyeglass. All right, Callie will go up
too, and she is doing something with a short sword, is that
correct? Yeah, you see that she's got
like a couple eyeglasses, one over the other, magnifying what
she's doing, and she's doing some dwarven runes on the hilt.
Kelly's definitely going to justwalk up and be like, what you

(43:47):
doing? This is so cool.
This is so cool. You're very talented.
What is it? It is a cool.
Yeah. Yeah, it's cool.
It's cool. All right.
You guys want something from a shop here?
Oh, yes, actually. So there was this guy that's
trying to help his grandmother, and then these three thieves,
they like, they totally robbed him.

(44:08):
And one of them came here and brought in this eyeglass thing,
I guess. And like, we have to get that
back because, right, Right. Like he's got to save his
grandmother, right? So like, how can we just have
that back please? I've seen it.
I've seen the eyeglass been soldto me already.
Listen Hun, you, you look familiar.

(44:29):
You wouldn't happen to be related to any quill quivers,
would you? I am.
Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh.
Yes, they were vendors. Yeah, yeah.
I thought you only visited the important towns.
Well, so everybody just kind of assumes I'm a crazy cool

(44:50):
adventurer just like my parents.But honestly, like I am more
into getting to know the people and understanding like just
being a real person, you know, like just being real, Right,
right. And so so I'm just here visiting
and I'm just writing a little column.
I was had the opportunity to. Yes, I remember one of your
columns actually #187 Oh my gosh, Yeah, I'll never forget

(45:14):
that phrase. Oh my gosh, like.
Being gently suffocated by a dish rag blessed by a goblin is
how you described my shop back in Aramore.
I she looks back. I just give like an OK symbol
like nod slowly like. Becomes like nudging rigs, like
see, I told you this is the way we should have done this.

(45:36):
This is great. Well, I'll tell you what, that's
all in the past. I got my shop here now.
You are a bigger person, my friend.
So I'll tell you what, I'll sellit back to you.
I still got to make a profit. Give it to you for 100 gold
pieces. We could have it back.
Right over there. I'm meander over and I go
Prilla. I'm new to town.

(45:57):
My name is Ricks. I'm new.
I'm new with the whole black humanitarians here and.
I've seen you around Ricks, of course.
I've seen you around, but I never had the pleasure of, of,
of meeting with you and conversing with you.
Well, you see, we just we we that artifact was was
apprehended illegally and was stolen.
Now we can get into the semantics of stolen goods at

(46:19):
local pawn shops and. Sorry, I'm just so distracted.
Is this like a new power of yours?
Are are you like a in shape shift now?
I ain't seen you so hairy before.
You see, well, one of my recent missions I accidentally made two
Wizards very angry at me. There was a cursed object
involved, and a. Lot of.
Flying spells and magics and gems being crushed and cursed at

(46:42):
the same time and. I magic the end.
Result. But yes yes I working on it.
Working on my. OK.
All right. Yes.
Yes, yes. Well, you know by hold back
common law and Aramour common law that any illegal goods that
here at a pawn shop with proof needs to be turned over to
authorities whether you are reimbursed or not.

(47:02):
We luckily have your reimbursement right here and I
take out the bag of 50 gold pieces and slide it over.
We we just caught the thief and happy to return your money at no
loss to you. We need that as a part of a
greater. Investigation.
Yeah, actually must have been a different monocle.
I was thinking of me or my. Oh, that's, that's the one.
That's the one. And I must have.

(47:24):
A different one, but I tell you what, for 100 gold pieces, I'll
give you that random monocle behind the glass that I have no
idea where it came from. So you know how high with that
really unflattering review. And I'm so sorry.
I feel deeply sorry for that. I have thought about it and I
feel like I have learned from that experience.

(47:44):
I see. And I would really love if if I
could do another piece on this adorable shop.
Oh really. And like, I would really love
the chance to revisit my opinionof this place.
And honestly, I see there is helping us help this man would

(48:05):
just be a wonderful angle for meto.
See on the. Article.
Me with advantage. Give me a persuasion check
because you said you'd write heranother piece, which is a really
good piece of bait. So that was a 10.
And then you said with advantage, yeah.
Mm hmm. I'm waiting. 21.

(48:26):
Oh, there you go. Yeah, that's more than enough
all. Right.
I'll tell you what, you do that piece for me.
I I'll consider us even. You're right, you know, maybe
you could just give me what I paid for it and I'll be
reimbursed what I already gave away and you can have it back.
It's part of a crime scene afterall, so.
Crilla, you are a legend. A legend.

(48:48):
And like she's. Going to write in her book.
Legend Crilla. Dash.
Legend. That's right.
That's right. And she's kind of getting
excited and she goes over and kind of puts her hand like in a
circular motion. It creates a circle hole in the
cubby that's in her shelf. And she grabs A monocle.
All right, here you are. Here's your monocle.

(49:09):
I hand over the 50 gold in the bag.
I appreciate you Rick's hopefully hopefully figure out
that hairy situation. I'm sorry that's happening to
you and econ you single he. Did.
I'm good. You're good.
Yep, Yep it. Must not be your type huh?
I get you. I see you looking ugly eyes.

(49:31):
Had that shadow lady with all the witchcraft and window no.
No. Sneaking around and I.
I get it, I get it. We got to go.
It was great, Great seeing you got to go and he come, runs out
the door. Everybody can give me either an
investigation or an Arcana checkas you look at this monocle.

(49:52):
Either of them is great. 14. 11.It's a nine. 9 These are great
rules. Luckily one of ya knows what's
going on here. It's a monocle.
It's a monocle, Yeah. Riggs.
As you're kind of looking through, all of a sudden the
reflection catches your eye in astrange way, and then you kind

(50:14):
of put it up so you can kind of see the sun shining through and
you realize that there are little, almost frosted areas in
a specific line pattern, somewhat like a maze on the
monocle. Looks like someone etched the
Sunday's maze into the lens of this.
Maybe a map? It's like a map.
That's so cool. That is such a great idea.

(50:36):
Yes, and I put it to my A map for the fantasy.
Very fantasy. Let's see here.
Maybe we should look to the north and IA.
Beggar goes, it's great. Go peace.
I like this tower. You come.

(50:56):
I can see why you live here. It's splendid.
As he holds the hat to you as you walk by, it's.
Like a copper in it? Why not?
I hope. That rat.
Copper's good enough and you decide to go north.
I almost never have changed. It's so rare.
As you make your way to the north.

(51:16):
This is where the woods was. That's correct.
You head to the north in the direction that this thief told
you to go and make your way deepinto Brindle Nook woods
aswallowed by vines and fallen leaves says forgotten the shrine
to sillowing Weaver of Fates. The shrine is quiet.

(51:38):
Moss creeps across crumbled stone and you can see a glowing
brass key rests on an altar bowl.
But before it, it is guarded by a spirit, and in front of the
spirit you see a bloodied corpse.
Just on the ground, just like right there, yeah.

(52:00):
There's been and I look at Galliopi when I say this to try
to like hyper up a murder. My monkey fingers gone like.
Is it moving? Is it doing anything?
Is it? Just head at you.
Hello. I'm not really one of the
spiritual nature. Perhaps this is your Forte?

(52:21):
Don't worry. Yeah.
Oh, do I love spirits. Venture forward.
I walk forward a little bit and then stop before I get to the
stairs and say, so I need that key and I need it as soon as
possible. What's the what's with this guy?
And I point down to the. I see this one, it tried to

(52:48):
attack me in this location. Yeah, we mean you no harm.
I believe it. Oh OK cool.
So can we have that key? Taken quite a liking to this
key. Site the whole back humanitarian
rules and regulations about stolen goods.
I, I, I put my hand up like hangon shit.

(53:10):
The what's now? The Oh, so we bargain with
spirits, and we came with an offering.
Ah. Yes, I do like offerings.
No one comes here anymore so I got restless to say the least.

(53:35):
Normally I wouldn't attack someone so frivolous.
I would transport them to somewhere bizarre, but I've been
a bit fed up as of late. I'm so sorry you feel that way.
Oh my gosh. Yes, thank you.
It's nice to be acknowledged. Yeah, that.
Must really be annoying to have to stay.

(53:56):
Where do you have to stay? Like right here?
Yes, like right here all the time.
That's so boring. I am bound to this location as
people have forgotten about me. I my reach does not stretch as
far. But I tell you what, if you have
an offering to give me. Or perhaps, let's see, we could

(54:16):
OfferUp stories, something of regrets, of betrayal.
How about ECOM holds up the mysterious key that he got from
the girl in the spider cave? A key for a key.
Oh, a key for a key. Might I see it?
And these really long, thin, sharp fingers bend and unfold

(54:41):
out for the key. All right, so knowing what I
know about spirits, I can give it to the spirit, Yeah.
You can give it to the Spirit. OK, before I do, I give it kind
of like a little spit shine likein my pocket with trying to do a
little sleight of hand. Doing Grady gum.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I got that set.
Right here for you back. It's totally high.

(55:02):
Shoulder. I'm not fine anymore, hang on.
Kelly Opie Real quick. And I like kind of, I'm sorry,
what? What?
What? What race are you?
Kelly Opie? Oh, I'm high Elf.
Oh, so I'm looking up like, do you have anything to do defend
yourself with just in case? I don't think we're gonna get
into anything but maybe a crossbow perhaps, I mean.

(55:23):
I have this spirit. She like her spirit out from
behind like it's right here. I don't use it very often
though, honestly, because I, I've gotten the finger looking
to do lots of stuff like, but like, I mean I can like put it
away like cuz it's like sometimes I trip and fall on
things and like running with a spear is probably not a great
idea. And so I kind of just tend to

(55:45):
keep that back there. Ecom Here's the the comments
about Spears. It's very frustrating.
You are as wise as you are tall.And I like give her like a pat
on the shoulder or like on our upper back.
And I give her botic inspiration.
Side note, my Botic inspiration does extra things by the way,
just so you know. So it's AD 8.
Don't be the Valor. Yes, and instead of using it for

(56:08):
any ability check whatever, you can use it as a defense or
offense. So you can use your D8 to
increase your AC if you're aboutto be hit by something.
So you increase your AC by 1D8 or increase your attack and
damage. I mean, I'm sorry, increase your
damage by 1D8 if you want to useit offensively.
On top of the normal Bart stuff.Yes.

(56:28):
That's cool. A key for a key is most
intriguing. This one given with love.
A key to 1's home. Wow, Are you sure you want to
give this to me? Yeah, yeah.
Well, I accept, and this key is yours.

(56:49):
And then slowly, creepily, it extends its foot long fingers
towards you and places the key in front of you to grab.
Nice. Pick it up.
Go and pick it up and take a bigstep back guys.
I think we're good and I hold upthe key and I'm looking at the
the group. Ecom, please come back and visit

(57:14):
sometime. We can discuss the dead.
Oh, and the way of the world. OK, I do like the.
I do like talking about the dead.
It's pretty cool. Yes.
By now I didn't. Know I was going to meet a
friend today. That's pretty awesome.
I will come back too because I have so many stories and I can't
imagine being stuck at like us place a place like this for that

(57:35):
long. We will come back and we will
chat. Yes, girl, she she gives you a
wink and kind of fades away, invisible now.
Should we be worried about the dead body?
You know what? We don't got time.

(57:56):
It's fine. It's fine.
He'll, he'll be there by the time we get back.
Hey, look, listen. Not our monkeys, not our circus.
You know what I'm saying? It's a lot coming from you.
Excuse me? Walk away.
You make your way into the western part of town, the nicer
part of town, and there's a lot of hubbub here.
There are a lot of shops around,and at this point you are a

(58:18):
little uncertain what to do. You see a couple shops, a couple
food stands, you see a magic item cart, you see someone like
passing out little candies for kids, you see someone making
like that cotton candy stuff that you see people do for kids
and it's a bit lively here. What y'all doing?

(58:40):
Oh clap, he's being extra slow. Just like this is so cool.
We have to get some cotton candy.
You do see some leftover string lights from a recent festival
Callie. Do you guys have festivals here
too? It's almost like a whole city.
We do we. We had what was the last one
called? Lunar.
No. Fall Festival, No.

(59:01):
Forger's Feast. Forger's feast, that's what it
was. I even I'm sitting here looking
at my notes. I just missed that one.
Yeah, leaf dropping. I still don't understand how it
works and vine, but yeah, it is.It's it's cool.
Let's love a lovely place and you're such a good tour guide,
OK? Thanks.

(59:21):
So do we, we don't have any information to go off of here,
right? Like where the crystal ball is?
Yeah, need to find some leads. Riggs, maybe you take the lead
on this morning. As a junior reformer, you really
need to start exercising your your mind as well as your body.
Junior, did you? Did you were at my promotional?

(59:42):
Yeah, you know. I saw you in the front row.
I saw you. Until I see it, I don't believe
it. Well, listen, I went to a lot of
different schools and let me tell you something, the streets
have taught me more than any school kid.
And I look around and I'm looking for any buskers, traba
doors, some sitting barge tryingto earn some coin.

(01:00:03):
Yeah, you see several St. performers, so you can go up to
any one of them. We see one juggling, you see one
that is walking a tightrope thatdid get a sanctioned type rope
put up here. So he's allowed to do that and
you also see someone eating a sword.
I go to the juggler because they're most probably the most
keen and most observant because they're doing a lot with their
hands that they need to be on onthe.

(01:00:25):
Level Hey, and that's another one.
Didn't think I could do eight ofthose, did you?
No. And you did it so many times and
equally impressed every single one of them.
I see you all back here in 10 minutes, thank you very much.
As they go and drink some water from a canteen and kind of put

(01:00:45):
their stuff together for the next act.
I walk over and be like, hey listen buddy, great show.
I love the way you juggle those those.
Balls and threw a couple of fruit.
Pieces of fruit in there. Hey, the way you threw in that
dagger to slice the fruit mid juggle, right?
Fantastic. That's right, I call it the
Ninja Fruit routine. Pretty good, right?
I, I, I never heard of what a ninja is.

(01:01:06):
It sounds fantastic. However, I have AI have a
question for you if you don't mind me indulging me?
Indulging me While you were juggling, I'm sure you've seen a
number of people stopping and passing by.
Did you happen to notice anybodythat was maybe a little more
rude or a little more shady trying to avoid your show by
going through the crowd of people stopping to watch you?

(01:01:28):
No, sorry, can't say I did. I've been so busy with my axe I
barely get to see anything that's going on in the crowds
and anything around me. But I would say either talk to
any of the cart owners or perhaps the food stands.
They're a little more aware as they have more time on their
hands. I'll take your advice and I
appreciate your insights on this.
And thank you very much. Always good to meet one of the

(01:01:51):
whole back humanitarians. I saw your speech today
wonderful. And I'm very happy that you.
Are. It's sad that you're cursed, but
happy that even in your cursed form you still choose to fight
with us. Well, you know, it's, you know,
it's a, you know, steal shopper than words.
And I planned. Here's my steal for justice.

(01:02:13):
Good day then. And he goes back to.
His stuff, well, he was worth a hell of beans, but we have to go
check out one of the food carts over here.
He he said that maybe one of thefood shop owners or one of the
food cart vendors might have some more information because
he's just so busy. And I do air quotes.
Around that. Yeah, you go up to fruit stand.

(01:02:34):
Oh yeah. Hello.
Sir, yes. Macy's, good to see ya.
So you like some fruit today? Not right now.
I'm on the job. Maybe a pair actually, if you
could step on to the side. But I'm more I'm more interested
in fecing on some information. Perhaps cutting it for you?
If you've seen anyone shady comeby here lately.
Shady, shady, and for the lady, anything.

(01:02:55):
Oh, no, you know what? What do you have?
Do you have like something exotic?
Like I had some of those apples and they were great, but like.
We have these marble berries. Arbled.
Berry. They call them marble because
they look very dense when you bite into them.
They're quite soft and tangy. The marble berries are very

(01:03:16):
special to hold back, so I wouldsuggest some of those if you're
new here. Well, I have to get some of
those, don't I? Oh my gosh, I will take some.
Let me ask you, would you like that in a parfait or would you
like it on its own? On its own would.
Be great, I'll just nibble. Absolutely, please make it a
sample platter and he's been really nice and giving you some

(01:03:38):
free of charge samples a while of just some of the local fruits
anyways, yes and as he's passingit over to you and collecting
your coin, I, I did see a banditcome through here earlier.
Specifically abandoned. Interesting.
Yes, but they did drop something, drop something round.
And yes, the curiosity cart overthere, the owner of that cart

(01:04:01):
picked it up way earlier today. I don't know if he's done
anything with it, but that is where it was last.
I appreciate that and I appreciate the free samples and
it's precise enough that pair for me.
Take a bite of it. Well, we'll see you around.
And my buddy ECOM here is going to handle the build.
Thanks. And I come on, Kelly Opie, can I
quickly take her away and leave ECOM with the bill?

(01:04:22):
How dare you? One gold piece, please.
I'm writing this. I'm writing this off when we get
back to the. I ask you for a gold piece.
Fruit's not very expensive and you hand them a gold piece and
go on over to the curiosity cart.
He's a Vesper. Land I.

(01:04:44):
Am the. Wildest card owner.
Of this. Sad.
Hold back. How could I do you?
Which is. Oh my gosh, you are so
wonderful. Hello.
So we were just told by this guywho gave you this lovely plate
of fruit. Would you like some?
Because you could totally have abite.
Do you want some some of those? Barbie Barbies.

(01:05:06):
Yeah. We're so good.
My goodness. So he, we got these and then
we're we're here actually chasing a bandit like well.
Bandis, I saw one. Earlier.
Drops up the mighty. Fine, picked it up, put it back
with mustache. Yes, I did.
And then he sees the whole back Humanitarians.
It's like, yes, I did. Not.
Do that thing that I said that Idid.

(01:05:31):
Come on, come on, you know what we're here for.
That's it. Did I say that?
He did. He did, actually.
It's cool. We just really just want the
orb. All right, I got the orb I got

(01:05:52):
the orb here's a bit of trouble,though.
I'll give it back to you. I I I promise I will I respect
you guys, but my my storage caveis where I put it earlier today
because I thought it might be precious.
Clearly it is because you're here and it it's a bit overrun
by Pixies right now. Was it overrun by Pixies before

(01:06:16):
or after you placed the orb? Well, that's why I ran.
Away this morning because some Pixies came in and.
So I was like, I'm just. Not going to think about this
today. I don't.
I can't think about that today. I just got to sell stuff and so
I came here with my cart and I've got together my magic items
and then this lady came up to me.
And she was like, oh, I'm not going to pay 200 gold just for a
magic wand. And I was like.

(01:06:37):
Bitch, of course you. Are it's a magic fucking wand.
And then I went all around town shouting to this lady, you know,
making a bad name of her because.
Why the heck? Should she not pay for such a
magical item? And then this other guy came up
and was like, do you see? Sorry, sorry I get a little.

(01:06:59):
Where do you orbit is? Which direction is this kid?
We'll we'll go retrieve it. Oh, I'll just take it there,
follow me. And he snaps his fingers and his
cart folds up, and he puts his cart in his pocket.
All. Righty this way.
And he takes you to the West outside of town, kind of closer
to the entrance of town on the West leading towards Gilo and

(01:07:20):
all the other towns. And he brings you to a defunct
sewer that is now his storage area.
And he's like, all right, there she is.
Pretty beautiful, ain't it? What?
What are we looking at? What?
Do you mean it's in my storage area?
Guys, are we gonna? Is that?

(01:07:41):
Don't mind the smell, it's fine.Riggs, why don't you go take a
look? Well, you know, you know what
they say. I go where others don't and I
walk over and over and I go overto the storage area, into The

(01:08:02):
Cave. Again, used to be a sewer, so
just, you know, traverse it likeyou would and I'll.
Be out here. Because I don't do the fighting
stuff good. Luck.
I'm sure it's not much of a problem.
And you head on in to the storage tunnel and you're just
going to immediately roll me initiative as you see all these
Pixies flying about. And he was telling the truth.

(01:08:25):
So we're all in there, right? Yeah, you're all in there.
You'll see. At the bottom left is the
entrance of the tunnel we all entered.
Left. Secret tunnel.
I'm sorry, 10. 13. Got a nine?
These Pixies are gonna go 1st and the Pixies are going to do
nothing at first on the turn, but they all kind of get in the

(01:08:46):
stances and you can discern thatthey're kind of getting ready to
do mechanically dodge actions. They are looking at you,
wondering what you're about to do.
Cali, what are you doing as you look at all these Pixies and
they're looking at you and they're holding gems and they're
holding little crystals? That is a great question.
What am I going to? Do.

(01:09:07):
I think that she probably wouldn't attack right away
because gems and crystals and shiny Pixies, but she definitely
would be very protective of her new Fred's.
So I'm going to just try to lookvery serious and ready.
Magic Missile. So you can ready an action to
shoot a magic missile if any of these Pixies decides to attack

(01:09:28):
anyone. If they attack any one of the
party. Riggs, what are you doing?
I walk 30 feet forward as I approach the stairs.
Like fellas, fellas? One of the Pixies says, Is that
you? I don't think I think these
Pixies are more treading along the line of caution than anger
and hostility. Perhaps if we just announce
ourselves and let them know thatwe're just looking for something

(01:09:48):
specific and that will be on ourway.
I'm I'll show the letters through.
I mean, Pixies are tend to be kinder in nature.
History check to see if I actually know that I don't know.
I don't want to know if Pixies are nice or not.
Yeah, do a history check. 4. You are bullshitting the ever
living hell out of this. I don't know what whatever

(01:10:09):
you're saying is, what you thinkyou're saying so.
Pixies are normally nice, so I'mjust going to go ahead and walk
through and look for this magical or with no
repercussions. And I am a friend.
I am not an enemy. We are here to help.
Dear Pixies of the sewer storageunit are.
You making a persuasion check. Yes.
Make me a persuasion check. Yeah.

(01:10:31):
Lucky. I want to use Lucky.
I'm going to use Lucky because we advantage.
OK, cool. That's 25 all.
Right first. First one, are you offering
anything, maybe from your pockets, your pack to the Pixie?
Are you? What are you doing to persuade
them to leave? Pulled out, I take out a a

(01:10:53):
mirror, a hand mirror and I maybe use some sleight of hand
that's kind of like and I like flip it through my it's like a
hand mirror, like flip it through my fingers and I'm
trying. To either a performance or a
deception check for sure. Can I use sleight of hand?
I'll do deception. I'll do deception.
OK, 21. Yeah, this, this Pixie like hots

(01:11:14):
up, drops its crystal and grabs your mirror and makes this noise
and all the Pixies kind of startflying and buzzing and it goes
up to ECOM and like makes a faceand then runs away and they all
start flying out. What the shit was that?

(01:11:34):
That's a term of a demon. That's a term of a demon for a
Pixies. The beast.
They like you. You see all the Pixies fly out,
all of them. That ends combat, all right?
And then this guy comes back in.Well, I'll be That was pretty
good. That was pretty good.
They all, they're all gone, right?
Every single Pixie, I can assureyou now.

(01:11:54):
He's still standing there like, I'm not sure, I don't know.
Well, let's go ahead and show uswhere you put this crystal ball
so we can go ahead and get out of the stinky sewer.
Already follow me. I'm pretty sure I put it this
way. I put it down.
Yeah, I'm ready for. It now that way.
Sorry this way. I'm going to find my orb today.

(01:12:16):
I'm going to find my Listen, yougo.
From Hoodwinked I need you. Yeah.
No, not here. I'm going to.
Find my old today I'm going to find my.
What I'm going to find. My.

(01:12:40):
After he falls down the waterwayI'm going to, I'm going to find
my orb today. He comes up out of the water,
finally makes it to his little bedroom area and far less part
of this defunct tunnel. I put my orb right here.
All right, here you are. Yeah, you're sorry.

(01:13:00):
I got a little slimy. I lifted on a slug, but that orb
is now yours, recharged because it was stolen to begin with by a
bandit, which I know and I wouldnever.
I was. I was saving it to give to you
all. I just.
I forgot it was this orb you're Speaking of.
I I look at like the slime like yeah, that's but we, we always

(01:13:23):
appreciate the help and of course you do because you read
the whole back humanitarian rules, the guidelines with the.
City. Damn straight I did read that.
I wipe the orb on him to get thesnail grease off him.
Yes, and I do appreciate your help as I keep trying to wipe it
off. And now free magic wand for 200
gold pieces. I think I'm good.

(01:13:43):
I don't really invite magic intomy life, but well.
OK. Well, have a good one.
All right, y'all have a good day.
See you. OK.
Thank you. I'd really love to like get in
here and help you with this, like your whole vibe in here and
just kind of maybe like get sometubs to put stuff in.

(01:14:08):
As they say. The Feng shui, yes.
We need to leave right now. I feel like we're going to get a
tetanus. In here, it's not great and we
start pushing you. Don't want to sneak for tea.
I got tea. I got leaf tea.
I got this kind of tea. I got that kind of tea.
Oh, there's tea, guys, there's tea.
Nope. Nope.
Nope, it's not the tea. You kind of.

(01:14:29):
It's not the tea you want. Look at the water.
It'll make you feel great. You all exit The Cave, now with
all the three items that you needed.
Well, let's go ahead and head tothat abandoned house and see if
this looks just real and help the help the help that old
gentleman. You got to save his grandma.

(01:14:51):
Yeah, the grandmother we got to save the.
What? Great, we're helping your
grandmother. Yes.
Rob, you son of a bitch. You might be reading too much
into it, but you son of a bitch,I think I know we're not going
to be fooled again. You can't use your damn regular

(01:15:15):
magic now. No, no.
You make your way to the southern part of town and
through the nautical district, and with all your items in hand,
you are confident that you have everything you need.
And as you make your way to the abandoned location and push your
way through the brush, you see this long rotting wooden pier of
sorts leading to the old Manor. A lot of waves have eroded the

(01:15:38):
supports and all the support beams there and in front of you.
What should have been a pretty well put together manner has now
been blown into by something youdon't see the man that needed
help before. Anywhere things are awry and you
see these animated armor and an animated broom look your way as
you make your way across the pier, blocking your way to a

(01:16:01):
chest that you see across a tiled floor.
Because I think we're at the wrong house.
Did you, were you sure of where he was talking about?
Because this doesn't feel like, I mean, like he's not even here.
Oh yes, I I read the math upsidedown.
It's not 19, it's 61. I'm going.
To be honest that that's not normal.

(01:16:23):
What's going on here? And Ecom's a little confused
about the animated moving thingsthat are in front.
Something gets so dark here is astrange.
So is that like a whole back thing?
And roll for initiative as they attack you.
Why is there a looming cloud just over this place,
particularly 16? 23.

(01:16:43):
A6 She does not want to go in there.
She's not going in there, ECOM. You see that this animated armor
and this broom that is floating in the air, bloodied by
something in its straw immediately turn their attention
to you with the intention to attack.
What are you doing? Is the armor separate from the
broom? Yep, right.

(01:17:04):
They're they're not one together.
Like walking up to the armor, ECOM is just kind of squinted
eyed. And then as soon as he sees the
blood, he's like, wait a minute,huh?
And then he runs and hits it with a spear.
Hitting the broom. The broom with a 23 to heads.
Offer him a mirror. And 14 damage.

(01:17:29):
What do you what do you say is you hit this broom?
Evil spirits are here. Riggs and Cali, you see him
faint and attack towards the armor and then go and attack
this broom and the broom splinters into a billion pieces.
Gone. That's right.
That was a great attack. That was really good.
That was really, really. Showing dominance over a
household cleaning object. He like faked it, like the

(01:17:51):
broom. Never saw that coming.
Swept that broom. And you?
I put my spear at the armor. What is this natural self
spirit? As it vibrates with magic.
All right, he attacks. It is not a good sound. 25 to
hit and 11 damage. Nice as I hit it with my spirit,
felt real solid. So he goes in and hits it with

(01:18:13):
query of blows. It's a 23 to hit and a 23 to
hit. Both hit 13 damage and 13 damage
are. We sure we should be attacking
Home Decor. I feel like we need to give it a
chance to do you see? The spirits I play right now as
he's punching the the armor. As it goes up and lifts this
great sword to attack you, all of a sudden it crumbles as you

(01:18:37):
hit into all these perfect spotsand it falls into the sea, into
the lake rather. Begone.
Spirits wait. Oh, if it does, I get the
temporary hit points. Yeah, I mean, you can choose if
you want to keep the temporary hit points you got from the
bakery or those. I'm getting this one.
So I grabbed this whatever sole was off of that off of that

(01:18:57):
armor and absorb it. Get 10 and 10 temporary hit
points. Now you see this room at what
should have been corridors and inside rooms are now open to the
air, crumbled from the roof down.
You see two stairways going up to a second floor that is barely
surviving and this tiled floor in front of you in a chest in

(01:19:21):
the middle of this tiled floor. Just she's just like, that was
just really well done. That was really you definitely
showed that furniture who was boss.
Yeah, they're really glad he's on our side.
He comes still absorbing a soul and just looks really happy for
the first time today. Oh, sorry, so.

(01:19:41):
So like half the house is disintegrated, right?
Yeah. Like it's like all caved in the
chest. Is that?
Is the chest equally dilapidated?
No, the chest looks pristine. Guys, I don't, I don't trust
that chest. A perception check if you like.
O18-O. 1715. Yeah, you all know.
Immediately you see a quick shine of magic across the chest.

(01:20:04):
That must have been protecting it.
I drove my short store at it because now we're being, you
know, this danger afoot. And I start walking more
animalistic like like using my arm, a Walker, like three leg
use, like a three leg approach while holding my short sword in
my free hand. Yeah, give me a Constitution
saving throw as you walk onto the tiles of.
Course I mean anything for you Mr. DMI mean what, an 18 to

(01:20:29):
fight? Very nice.
As you get blown back about 30 feet back onto the dock, you are
going to take 2D6 force damage. That is 7 force damage.
And you see me glide down and I shake all the dust off my fur.

(01:20:53):
OK, OK. What did you do?
It was a party and it was a blast.
I just slowly, cautiously approach back onto the steps.
So this place is booby trapped. Ecom looks at Callie to see if
she wrote that one in her notebook and is is patiently

(01:21:15):
waiting and worried that that was a really good one.
So we have a of course of coursetiles, magical chest, creepy
house monocle. And I pull out the monocle and I
put it to my eye and I only haveone eye open.
I'm holding it between my cheek and my eyebrow, like holding it

(01:21:36):
down tight. Yes, you hold the monocle into
your eye and it shines this magical path on these tiles
before you that only you can see, the others cannot.
Guys, if only we had a map like on where we could go in this
house that was that was safe, then it would be like a lot
easier. I don't know.
All. I have is this key?

(01:21:58):
Oh. Riggs, what do you got let?
Me go first. We wouldn't want our guests to
be blown to smithereens. Oh please, I'm following your
lead and I take a step backwards.
I follow the map on my monocle. Yes, you follow the map and then
you get blown back again. Make me a constitutional
savings. Hey.

(01:22:21):
Ecom As he flies back, you feel a vibration in your pocket and
you pull out the orb and you seea pulsating.
Should IA. 19 Take one point of force damage.
That's right, minor inconvenience.
As you float back down. I give the orb to Cali.

(01:22:44):
Look, I think you're magical. What are you?
What are you picking up from this?
Oh. Man, my dog's barking off.
Well, it's round. Yes, it's.
Kind of cool feeling. As you pass it to Cali you feel
it vibrates slightly more as it goes in that direction.
What? What direction?
Because you handed it kind of tothe northeast towards the

(01:23:05):
stairs. As she takes it and then holds
it up in this direction like does it get more?
Oh, yeah. It's very much like a metal
detector. You know, as you're going up the
stairs, you're like kind of following where it's pulsating a
little harder and then vibratinga little more.
And then you find a pedestal in the center of the wooden
flooring up here. See, Briggs, sometimes you just

(01:23:27):
got to, you know, go with your instincts on this one.
You're absolutely right. You're absolutely right.
And everybody that went on to the flooring, please make me a
Dexterity saving throw. Wait, everyone.
Yeah cuz y'all you all just rushed on there.
Well. I was.
Following Cali. Well, you didn't have to Cali.
Did my monocle tell me you were safe to step on?

(01:23:50):
Me 13 do the monocle up here. 13Oh, I got a natural 20 Nice and
22. We all passed.
So you're going to take half of oh, nothing because you pass and
you're about to like step through the wood and you
realize, oh shit, this is rotting.
I had to watch my step. And then you all get on a better

(01:24:11):
path, make your way to the center unharmed, and you put
this crystal ball in the pedestal.
It's like. Can I like look at the pedestal
for make sure that they're well,I guess some would be the
reverse direction that I would be worried about is taking some
off something off the. Pedestal.

(01:24:31):
OK, yes, I'll put the orb on thepedestal and duck.
And the shockwave comes out, butnothing harmful.
And then you see this ripple effect below you.
As you see all this magic below goes away.
You see these magical walls thatwere invisible before now become
visible and then evaporate that were around the tiles, the room

(01:24:54):
with the tiles. Yeah.
Wait a minute, the monocle saw the invisible walls or no?
No, the monocle saw the padding.This magical padding that leads
to the chest. Gotcha.
It goes like a grid on the tiles, like a maze.
Gotcha. But the walls were up, So now we
need to rigs get back on the tile.

(01:25:16):
Let's go. Oh.
Wait, go ahead. Believe it.
Being the way you move the characters is so good.
Try it again, ECOM. While he's waiting for Riggs to
get out there, he takes one giant step backwards again.
Let's let an expert handle this.I go on to the.
I tap it with my sword, the correct tile.

(01:25:38):
Yes, the correct tile does nothing.
You step onto it and nothing happens in this force does not
push you back like it did before.
You make your way through this pathing and you follow the
pathing until all of a sudden make me a constitution saving
for a police. Whoa.
You're doing. Great, Riggs.
You're like so talented at this.I'm lucky, lucky, lucky.

(01:26:00):
I'm using Lucky lucky lucky. Of course you're going to fail
and you're going to take 7 points of lightning damage as
your monkey hair goes and you all see him as he steps on
something and you kind of fall back, kind of blackened an ash.
I don't think that was the rightone.

(01:26:21):
I love this hair for you though Riggs, it looks great.
And then Riggs, you look one more time.
Now that you've done everything,you look one more time at the
monocle and you realize that someone is tampered with his
monocle and you see man made etchings that are showing a
wrong padding. And then when you scrub it off
and you give it a good cleaning,you see those man made pieces go

(01:26:45):
away and you now have the correct way to get to the chest.
I don't like how you soften me, Mr. DM.
Don't like the? Softening that you're doing
right now. We'll talk about in the after
show why that'll happen. It's hilarious that you want to
do it because you always react great to this stuff.

(01:27:06):
And you make your way to the front and you're now at the
chess, all right? And Callie's back there with a
key. This thing is probably what we
trapped. It might have teeth and eat
meat. Ecom seeing a a trail of
scenarios in his head. He's like Kelly look, we got the
chest. It's pristine.
You have the. Key The Mage hand the key over

(01:27:29):
to rigs. It's a great idea.
That's a great idea. I would have done something like
that. Mage handed just like over.
To yeah, you take minimal lightning damage as you keep
tapping against the walls by accident or the areas that are
magically booby trapped and thenfinally get it all the way
through. I'm going to use the key to

(01:27:53):
unlock this chest and remain unharmed.
It is a feat like no other and Ishakily put the key towards the
chest. Yes, make me a investigation
check. What'd you find?
3. Yes, you don't know notice
anything special, but you do seethat there is a lock in the

(01:28:16):
front, there's a keyhole in the front and it's like hanging off
the chest. Well, this is the only one I
see, so I'll put the key in thisone and I put the key in the.
Lock. Yes, you put the key into the
lock and you're going to make mea Dexterity saving throw,
please, of. Course, I am only four.
That's good. That's really good.

(01:28:36):
You're ready for this one. Fucking backflip.
The handy Come on Apple, Like doyou want one?
I'm I'm you know what? In this moment with the popcorn.
You take 11 points What? You take 11 points of force
damage as this chest explodes. Reaction.
No reaction. Yeah, well when I take I went my

(01:29:00):
hidozy dodge. When I take damage, you can use
the reaction to reduce the damage by 1 + 6 + 3.
Hell yeah biscuits. I rolled A1.
This is stupid. Oh my Oh my God, it's the last
session all over again. I reduced.
It by 4. About 7.
And as this explosion occurs andyou get blown back, two people

(01:29:23):
arise from the shadows and look down.
Dang it, that was supposed to destroy Caliop.
Dag Nabitz, how did this happen?And you see the man before you,
Stave Harmon. Stave, how dare you?

(01:29:44):
We trusted you. We were trying to help your
Nana. I'm not stave, you idiot.
I'm thimble scourge. I'm a tailor.
Remember. We're back in Aramore.
It ruined my reputation. OK, I can see that you have some
big feelings right now, my friend, but we need to just take
a deep breath and settle down. And we're just, we're just going

(01:30:07):
to, it's going to be OK. I'm so sorry.
You know, I was a different person.
I've definitely learned from that situation.
You're right, it is going to be just fine and you see that the
owner of the odds and end shop, the dwarf, steps forward.
Oh my goodness. Ella, I thought we understood

(01:30:29):
each other. Understood each other maybe
fine, but I still want my revenge.
I'm poor now. I used to have such great odds
and end shop until you ruin my reputation with your bang
freaking column. How dare you?
And they raised their hands. I.
Drink a potion of greater healing.
Yep. Well, everybody take one action.

(01:30:53):
As you see, they're taking theiraction I.
Throw my potion of greater healing to Rick's.
And they create a magical barrier around the entire Manor,
blocking off any exit now. Is time to perish.
And we're all going to roll initiative.
It'd be fun. It's gonna be fun.
Not worried. Wait, man, roll initiative.
Again, Yeah, re roll initiative.The measly 2.

(01:31:16):
How hard could this be? Easy.
I mean, it's probably fine. 10 Igot a. 90 I got a 920.
Kelly, you see some haters standing in front of you, Yes.
They do. Bad mouthing your column.
What are you going to do as theylook on you from the second
floor? OK so for Quicken spell for the

(01:31:37):
house rules, is it first level spell or second level or can
trip that we use? Yeah, it can be a can trip.
It can be a spell. For me, it's anything as long as
it's something you cast. Oh, OK.
You can quicken it if it was an action.
It's now a bonus action if you're using that Quicken spell.
Can you do 2 spells together? Yes, for my home brew, I allow
that. OK, I know we don't in our main

(01:31:59):
campaign, but I yeah, I don't care.
If you want to use up your spellslots right away, that's on you.
If you want to use a blind spellslots you know.
Yeah, that's a good point. OK I would like to use Quicken
spell and cast disguise self to look like Prilla and Misty step

(01:32:20):
up next to her. Nice.
That's awesome. Hell yeah.
Oh, that's cool. You.
Yeah. You run forward, you miss, you
step in. When the mist clears, you now
look like Prilla and you will roll a deception check.
That's so cool. 17. Now 1 Oh no it's a 12 this dye

(01:32:44):
is getting old 2 got disappearedbut still fails so you you can
see that what did I name them again?
Not stave thimble Thimble scaring yes Thimble looks over
after the miss clears. What?
What's happened? What is this witchcraft?

(01:33:04):
No, no, she's duplicating. No, you're duplicating.
Wait, do I have two allies? Do I have an enemy?
This is wrong. And Perla obviously goes it's
me. Him, obviously.
It's obviously me over here. No, it's me.
It's me. I'm right here.
I'm right here. I can't believe you know.
Maybe not. She's like me.
But it's not me. I don't know what she is talking

(01:33:24):
about. And then what are you doing?
So you did the sky self and the misty step with Quicken spells.
So that's going to be everythingyou can do on your turn, right?
Yes. Oh, that's awesome.
As it goes to Thumble. I can't think about that right
now. I just can't.
OK, screw all of you and cast invisibility and goes invisible

(01:33:45):
and then it's going to move to Frank's turn.
I was gonna do something againsthim, but I can't see him.
I'm known to so the so I can walk anywhere now.
I'm free to move. Yeah.
Yeah, you're free to move. I'm.
Gonna take a couple steps towards the stairs.
Yeah. And then I'm going to take a
dodge action. OK.

(01:34:06):
Now we go to it. Yes, Perilla is going to go and
Perilla is going to use a good old fire bolt on rigs coming up
the stairs. Doesn't like that six to
completely miss you. Nice.
They're getting some daggers ready.
Perilla turns towards other Perilla and is getting very

(01:34:28):
upset out of the situation as ECOM decides what to do.
Do I know which ones which? Oh, yes, you you both make
perception checks. You just got to beat her.
Yeah, Perception against her deception.
So I got 12. So no, I don't know which one
switch. Actually, no, you both.

(01:34:49):
You both know now. Actually, because Prilla
attacked rings, Kelly would. Have done this.
OK. OK.
So you can probably discern fromthe situation and that the one
that shot is going to be the one.
I'll move forward 30 spaces up the stairs and or wait 50 spaces
up the stairs. So I'm like most the way up it
and then I'm going to use poisonspray from a distance.

(01:35:12):
How about that on the the Prillathat shot at Riggs?
Absolutely. And it's a 13 to hit.
Yeah, 13 is going to hit. It does 18 damage. 18 damage.
You already see that Prilla's looking pretty messed up.
Dang you. This is this.
Is bad thumble. Where'd you go, where'd you go?

(01:35:34):
And is there anything else you want to do on your turn?
And she's looking messed up. No, I'm good it.
Goes back to Callie's turn. I would like to cast
Prestidigitation at Riggs and have it look like I'm also
attacking. Wow.
Give me We'll keep the same deception check and we'll just

(01:35:55):
keep rolling for Thumbles reception.
All right, I'll tell you what happens later, but yeah, you
how? Dare you?
I would like to use a performance check to really eat
that bolt. Make it seem like it really
landed. Yeah, I'll roll a disadvantage
and. Oh.
The fiery blazes of a verdict that scorched my fur.

(01:36:17):
It burns with 1000 Suns. This is very barky.
I love it. And and that will be, yeah,
we'll say that's you. Prestigitation is an action.
So is there any bonus I actuallylike to do on your turn?
No, I'm just going to be like, Idon't know why you got hit.
Obviously it's her. She's just standing there, not

(01:36:39):
even defending herself. One of those fire bolts were
fake and clearly ineffective while this one burns.
Please hand me some ointment to go to singe.
Like pull my singe. Amazing as it goes to in Bulls
turn. Make a dint think.
That Oh yeah, they. Really ruined their first turn.

(01:37:01):
That was awesome. That was so cool.
I haven't seen them stammer thismuch in a real long time.
Out of invisibility as they are making attack rolls with a
vantage of course, because they are invisible.
Riggs you see Econ Halle, you all see Thimble reappear at the
back end of this. Almost like this porch that

(01:37:22):
comes out of the house opened onto the lake and they're going
to take an attack roll at each of you, one of them at Prilla
because your deception check wasgood enough and Riggs is really
good at performance. All right, the first one we're
going to do Riggs first. We'll just go left to right.

(01:37:44):
So Riggs that is a 25 to hit lucky disadvantage.
It'll just re roll. I guess it re rolled and got an
at 20 on you, but we'll say it'sjust a normal hit because it.
What for me? Yeah.
It's disadvantage. It just makes the tactical.
Advantage. No, but it had advantage, so it
evened. Oh, gotcha.
Yes. So we're going to say that Nat
20 is cancelled, but that previous we'll take the previous

(01:38:07):
hit. OK, that's fine.
So it's going to hit Perilla andthen E COM 21 shouldn't hit you
Riggs you take. Whoa, that's a lot of damage.
Riggs, you take 26 points of damage. 26 I'm going to use my

(01:38:28):
dodge on that to laugh a little bit.
Oh wait, wait a minute. I had AI had a dodge action.
Yeah, so take back your reaction.
I was just thinking, yeah, yeah,all right, I'm going to use my
Hidozi. My Hidozi reduced damage
ability. And so 3 + 4 seven Perilla
obliterated. Oh, done.

(01:38:49):
Dead. Dead.
Wow, I'm on the floor. That's right.
What does Cali say to this? I know where you are.
Cali. You can't fool me.
Your shop is terrible. Watch, watch, watch.
And E com you take. 12. OK, Yeah.

(01:39:12):
Yeah, hold really low on that 11212 points of force damage,
Psychic, sorry, Psychic damage as it moves back to I'm.
Going to go ahead and move 30 feet and out of my bindle of
daggers. I'm going to throw 2 daggers at
them. OK, I'm going to go ahead and
throw 2 daggers at them. 22 to hit and a 12.

(01:39:38):
Misses. So that first one's going to be
a 14 points of damage total. How?
We stop. As he complaints as you hit him
with a dagger. I use my free action to mock
them, but I do a little crying. Shut up E com what are you doing

(01:39:59):
with Prilla now going. Is Kelly still look like Prilla?
Yeah, and she said the shop thing.
OK, so E com. Definitely.
E com definitely is. He wasn't sure at first, but
then once Kelly said the shop, Little dig.
He's very sure now. Sigh of Relief turns down the

(01:40:20):
stairs and does a dash action tothimble.
Oh, you're a fast one. Dash action is my action right?
If you're not using your key points, you can do a bonus
action, right? I can do that, so I'll use a key
point to dash. I got you.
Hey, you know what? I'm trying to look it out for

(01:40:42):
you, man. Just look.
Just trying to figure this monk thing out.
OK, so then I'll use my spear todo the attack still.
Yeah. So 18 to hit.
It's nice. And 19 to hit, so 10 damage and
nine damage as I go sprinting inand do 2 jabs at thimble.
Come roughed up. Thimble's looking roughed up.

(01:41:03):
That is my turn. Cali, you look down at your
hater. How?
How far away am I? Pretty Dang far.
Yeah. 90 feet, we'll say, in total.
Oh, maps a little weird. It would take you 90 feet to get
there. I the rage is that I defeat I'm
in a cast chromatic orb. Oh.
Nice. Roll the.

(01:41:24):
Hit at level one or two. Let's do level 2.
Yeah, nice, Yeah. Oh great, I rolled.
You want to use your inspirationdie inspiration.
I do. I do re roll that.
I'm going to re roll that. It's good thing we have that
inspiration from the Little BoatRace, huh?
Yes. That's going to hit oh.

(01:41:44):
Baby that's going to hit, it's going to be bad for thimble.
It's a lot of ones. It's a lot of ones.
So that's 6. Total.
Oh, that's a shame. I was thimble's happy about
that. That was for you thimble.
Oh, click one more D8 because you did it.
You accidentally hit the level 1output.

(01:42:07):
Oh, OK, one more D8I. Was like, that's a little low.
7. Oh, there you go.
Looking bloodied. Looking bloodied everybody.
And she's going to go and stick her tongue out at him.
You're so disgusting. Are we?
And is that everything you're going to do on your turn?

(01:42:29):
So there's none of the like pattern that we have to follow
anymore, correct? No, that's all gone.
So I'm going to, I think you could do about what you could
hear from. Yeah.
And that is? It how dare all of you Missy
step as she steps away from E com.
We're a little too far there. Give me a SEC.

(01:42:49):
Get back here. And is going to also move 30
feet away. They are going to cast oh, what
are they going to do? I think they're going to cast
old person on E com. So E com you are going to make

(01:43:11):
me a Wisdom saving throw please.Friggin wisdom, right?
So I Nope, but I still have an inspiration from whatever we did
last. You also have my bardic
inspiration that you can add 1D8. 1D81-D. 8 So you're re
rolling that Yeah, an inspiration daddy.

(01:43:33):
So roll that D8 and. Oh my God, might as well.
Pray to the Raven Queen that. You.
Oh. OK, just to let's let's say this
out loud. So the first time I rolled, I
got a nine. Oh, that's.
Wrong. So I got a 6 + 3 which is 9.

(01:43:53):
The second time I rolled I got a4 + 3 which is 7 and then I
rolled AD 8. For my parting inspiration I got
a 1, so 8. My first row was still better.
Yes, you are now paralyzed. At the end of each of your
turns, you can make another Wisdom saving throw, and on a
success the spell ends. What do I have to beat?

(01:44:14):
You have to beat a 15. OK, cool, 14.
You got to be a 14. What is this?
Let me go. He's trying to wiggle, but he's
frozen. Riggs, what are you doing?
It's a good question. I'm going to, I'm going to try
to dupe them. What I'm going to do will be

(01:44:35):
like, well, it seems that you could fair up against my friends
here, but let's see how you do against something truly dubious.
And I take out my my deck of illusions.
Yes, I'm going to draw a card and see what I summoned to try
to scare the crap out of them. I'm going to roll D100 and we're
going to see what I summon. Yeah, you throw that card down.

(01:44:58):
59 That is a an iron golem. An iron golem OK.
Now call back by the way, that was what?
Yeah, that's cool. Or summoned from the ground in
this iron machinery like portal opens up as this mech of a golem

(01:45:23):
hoax over him. Yeah, make me a deception check.
Deception check Yeah 22. Very good.
What else are you doing on your turn?
That. That's it.
That's what I'm going to do. That's my action.
Econ Your turn goes by. Make me another check, a Wisdom
saving throw. 5. Callie, what are you doing?

(01:45:46):
I can't. Your friend is drafted.
This is so annoying. I'm going to cast fire Volt that
is a 17. It's going to use a reaction
called Instinctive Charm when a visible creature within 30 feet.
Oh wait, you're not within 30 feet.
Fuck. Never mind, it doesn't use a
reaction. Continue hitting this wizard.

(01:46:08):
I dupe myself. I've been duped.
A3. Ah, a three, are we?
Slight bird. Oh.
Stop it. Stop it.
I hate everything. About this just let me have my
revenge. You hold back humanitarians.
If confidence could fix everything, you'd still be a

(01:46:30):
mess. I'm.
Just going to like, doesn't it burn?
I mean, yes it does, but I don'tlike it.
As he shoots. Magic bolts, the one at the
Gollum, it shoots a magic bolt at the Gollum and we're just
going to roll to hit because that's just what it would do,
you know, and we would see what it would hit the world 12 at the

(01:46:53):
golem. But it does notice now it's an
illusion, so it's just going through.
Not if it doesn't hit, it uses. It can't do anything, but it
still has that of the block. Yeah, that's.
That's crazy. Yeah, yeah, if they believe
it's. Real it has it's that's so cool

(01:47:13):
there to like use, but it doesn't come again.
Misses. Yeah, and a 26, now 20 hits.
And. It realizes then, after
expending all of its bolts, thatit is not doing anything great.
It's like, this is bad, this is bad.
What? No, I've been duped.
I've been duped. Twice in one.
Day, you're so stupid. What would I golden be doing

(01:47:39):
here in this old house? You were here.
You sucked the house. I'm not.
Stupid and it's going to misty step with a bonus action onto
the chest that exploded in that area.
That's going to be its turn as used all of the tags on the
Aaron Golem. That was awesome.
Riggs, what are you doing now? I'm going to antagonize them and

(01:48:01):
I'm going to be like, for every dollar, for every spot thing you
said, I'd still be broke, you doofus.
Your shot failed because you're a terrible vendor.
And that's the antagonize ability.
So he has to make a Wisdom saving throw with DC-14.
Or what? But takes damage and something
else happens. On a failed save, the target
takes 4D4, fails embarrassment damage, I'll call it, and

(01:48:23):
immediately uses its reaction tomake a melee attack against
another creature of my choice. And the target can't make this
attack because of example, if someone's there, the target
instead has disadvantage on the next attack roll makes before
the start of my next turn. Let's do the damage real quick.
Yeah, he's going to take 15 points of embarrassment damage.

(01:48:43):
I'm liking that. I'm liking that at all.
That's what and I'm going to take more advantageous viewpoint
and just kind of move behind them about 10 feet away.
Can really bloodied as ecom continues crashing.
OK. Has this is concentration right?
They've been concentration, concentration.
Yes, they need to roll concentration.

(01:49:03):
Thank you. That was very right.
That was very, very right. Such a good.
Bird fails. Yeah, fails.
He comes out, breaks out. Boom, broken down.
Sprinting to get there. He's on a mission, literally. 50
feet away. Bonus action goes in for.

(01:49:24):
All all the attacks and the spear.
Awesome. Does 12.
He got a little too eager misseswith that one.
What? Then he gets on that 20 right
after it. Cuff his hands.
He's a wizard. Cuff his hands.
Wait, are we trying to restrain him?
I mean, we should, we should tryto arrest him, but more
importantly, if he can't use phalanges, then he can't carry

(01:49:46):
his spells, so. It's going to use a reaction.
What did I got on that 20? Yeah, I got.
So I got such a good thing to say too.
I got to. It's going to use Instinctive
Charm. When a visible creature within
30 feet of the enchanter makes atackle against it, the enchanter
forces the attacker attacker to make ADC 14 Wisdom saving throw,
which you will make with advantage because of your charm

(01:50:08):
stuff. On a fail save, the attacker
redirects the attack to the creature closest to it, which
would be race. 16. Passes.
So wait, do I get a net 20? This guy how?
Do you murder them gay? I run up to him.
OK, I run up to him. Not lethal, guys.
What's that? You're not lethal?
Oh, no. So Econ being so frustrated with

(01:50:31):
the cage, hearing the commotionsand see that Cali got one up on
him and then Rick's got one up on him.
He breaks out of the whole person, sprints across, misses
with his first attack, corrects with the second.
When it comes down with the spear before he does, he's like,
hey, do you know Owen? Who's?

(01:50:51):
Owen, you're Owen 3 and he goes.Dan knows what that's.
From Oh my God yeah. Big shout out to Man with Glass
for that one. Owen 3 Bang.

(01:51:14):
You slam your spear down into his chest.
The wind breaks the clouds. I look at Cali and I'm like.
Write that down. Write that down.
She uses me chance to clap and then writes it down.
Yes. I'm in the book.
I forgot what we were doing. Everybody give me a perception

(01:51:39):
check. 70 No Lucky, lucky, lucky.
No. 12 No 20 common Cali see this happening as as thimble is

(01:52:00):
going no, I was going to give myrevenge.
You look so stupid. You your your clothes are
hideous Cali. As he collapses onto the ground
you look around and you see a lot of the support beams.
All of a sudden you notice that there was magic holding up all

(01:52:20):
the support beams and you feel the ground begin to shake as the
whole manner begins to crumble around you and sink into itself.
Everybody will make me a Dexterity saving throw, please.
Guys, we gotta go. We gotta go. 18 You still have
your inspiration, Doc Callie. Sure you you do.

(01:52:42):
I thought I I used that. Oh.
That was your heroic inspiration.
You saw the. She did use that she did use.
Her I did use bardic though. The bardic Yeah.
Use a D8 or another D8 and add it to your Dexterity saving
throw. That's a 1.
So now I have 11. No, but I would like to.

(01:53:03):
Can I use tides of chaos? You can.
What does that do? I think read it.
Ted's Chaos. You can give yourself advantage
on one D20 test. Before you roll the D20, you
must cast a sorcerer's spell with a spell slot or finish a
long rest before you can use this feature again.
If you do cast a sorcerer's spell with a spell slot before
you finish long rest, you have to roll on the Wildcat.

(01:53:25):
So do I just re roll AD 20 or doI re roll the decks?
You just re roll the deck savingthrow. 18.
Roll me a just a regular D20 because I believe you are a wild
magic. 2. Two, and you're good.
You're good and Ecom Riggs. As you rush forward out of the

(01:53:47):
Manor, you see Cali come behind you really quickly.
But then with his last breath you see Thimble grab Cali with a
magical purple gauntlet. No you will not go anywhere as
you see the Manor begin to crumble around them and she
sinks deep into the Manor. Callie, what do you say as you

(01:54:11):
begin to seep into the sinkhole?Guys, guys, this is like not
what I saw happening here. This is not you guys.
You know, it's OK. Keep going, keep going.
It's like a far better thing I do now than I've ever done and
like it's a far better rest I goto now than I have ever known.

(01:54:34):
Just if there's a statue, make sure there's good lighting.
She's. Gone.
As she sinks into the abyss withthimble holding her into magic
Riggs E com you maybe reach out with a final flea as everything
crumbles and crashes into itself.
The dust settles and you see no remnants of anybody.

(01:55:00):
Well, I'm not telling the mayor and I start walking away.
That's where we'll end this episode.
I got to go make a golden brown.No.
No. Oh.

(01:55:20):
Man. Too good.
Too good. Oh my gosh, thank you so much.
By the way, Glitch for. Joining us yeah of.
Course thank you for having me guys.
It was so much fun that. Was a blast.
It was a blast. It was good, that was.
Another super fun episode. Oh my goodness.
Sure. I hope everybody enjoyed having
these guests on and have been enjoying these episodes and

(01:55:42):
Riggs, the new member of this party.
Yeah. Yeah, because Tony wanted to
play a new character. Yeah, Yeah.
Fun fact, I hate paladins so I didn't.
They got to be playing a paladinfor that.
Long Yes, it's probably the 56thtime you've heard Tony say that,
and it's very true every single time.
He. Says oh, sure.
No. I don't mind Paladins, but

(01:56:03):
they're still probably the last that I would want to play of
like, they're all good, they're all good, you know, they're all
good in their own ways, but you know, But with that being said,
glitch, if 30 seconds, we do this for everybody to shout out
something you're doing or maybe something someone else is doing,
30 seconds is yours. Start the show you'd like,

(01:56:24):
whatever you want. Ever you want.
There's this podcast that I listen to and it's called D&D
Border Four. And then you're like.
There's. Like so cool.
Yeah, you can't. Take.
That's good. Love those guys.

(01:56:46):
They're. Like really great.
It's super fun to listen to. I highly recommend that You guys
should go find them and check them out.
Is there something that's going on in your life?
Is there something you just wantto talk about?
Any shows? Yeah, I got any recommendations
for us? What should we be watching right
now? I don't know, I go through shows
really fast, actually. Oh yeah.

(01:57:06):
What's? The last show you watched?
I just watched Adolescence whichwas intense but very good.
I. Was thinking of starting that
one. And then I found recently right
before that severance, which is like, it's awesome.
I just. Saw everybody here loves
Severance except for me who hasn't watched it but will
probably love it when I watch it.
Shun. Yeah, they, they sucked me into

(01:57:26):
Apple TV with that one. I was like, right, so resisting.
And then I was like, but this one of those looked really good.
And then they got me. They got me.
Like oh, why am I forgetting thecoach show?
Ted Lasso. Ted Lasso.
Ted Lasso is like one that I would definitely want to watch
for sure on Apple. So like now, there's so much on

(01:57:47):
Apple that I want to wait. Dan, you haven't seen it.
I've seen season 1 of Ted Lasso.I haven't gotten through a lot.
Tony, you haven't seen it. Just started it today.
Today, why am I friends? With you guys.
I don't. Relax.
Do you eat 3 foods? How am I friends with you?
OK, right. It is the most heart warming
show. I've never watched a show and

(01:58:08):
felt better at the end of it than I did at the beginning.
Like, it's so good, yeah. OK, so everybody go watch
adolescence. So this was basically a sponsor
for Apple TV. Goodness.
Not. Sponsor DND for everyone.
If you want to. And I'm.
Listening. That's that's going to be it.

(01:58:29):
Follow us into patreon.com/GND four O 4 if you want to go watch
the after show with Glitch here.Almost said your real name
shouldn't say that. We're going to talk about what
she thought about the episode, what she liked me, what she
didn't like, and how she thoughtthese guys did as well.
So follow us over there. But until then, everybody give

(01:58:51):
your most sleigh. Goodbye, bye, goodbye.
I'm totally killing this. Bye later, bye.
Bye. All right, everybody, welcome
back to Drell's first annual Bodacious Boditorium

(01:59:11):
Bodybuilding contest. Try to say that five times fast
and I will be going over the contestants.
First we have the bloodshot Bandits.
The Dread. You've officially become a
silent icon in the posing practice room that Mere Rotini
did yesterday. Powerful, elegant and

(01:59:32):
terrifying. A couple new members actually
left the gym because they thought you were a rape that had
materialized. Can't wait to see what you bring
to the stage. Might not speak so your flexes
are loud Brandy woodburner whileeveryone else is trying to get
their micros right. You rolled in and asked if we

(01:59:53):
wanted red, white, or sparkling Brandy.
You're not competing, but you'remaking sure the post competition
celebrations are legendary and you're dead.
Lift and Dry rose tasting last night is already sold out and
the bench press brew. You dropped off surprisingly

(02:00:16):
drinkable after a set of curls. Bless you and your blessed
barrels, Craig Dawnbringer. There was a rumor going around
that you weren't entering the competition, but I've noticed a
sudden increase in protein shakes, mirror glances, and
subtle lunges during conversation.
Don't worry, I get it. I mean, I totally do the same

(02:00:37):
thing. You're going for the surprise
reveal strategy? Bold move.
Just know I'm on to you, Julius Kendrick.
Still technically on probation, but somehow I found your name on
the men's most theatrical entrance sign up sheet.
What do you know? Fine, you know what you're in.
If you want to descend from the ceiling on a robe swing, just

(02:01:00):
test it this time. Julius, we're still recovering
from the fog machine incident. Knock Mock Your cooking has
fueled half the competitors in this gym and possibly made the
other half weep tears of flavorful induced joy.
That new high protein spice Stewyou've been testing is either
game changer or a mild hallucinogen.

(02:01:22):
I'm not really sure yet. Regardless, you've earned the
title Master of the meal prep inmuscle growth.
Just maybe tone down the heat next batch.
We lost 3 lifters to spice induced vision loss yesterday.
Morgan Oldfield, while you haven't signed up, I've seen you

(02:01:42):
and your fox familiar running synchronized hill sprints behind
the gym. Either you're preparing for the
comp or for some sort of woodland ambush scenario.
Either way, I respect the hustleand so does your fox, for the
record, is now also maybe has better ABS than half the gym.

(02:02:05):
I'm just saying Artemis, you're not competing but you've taken
upon yourself to be the officialintimidation coach for the
competitors. Whispering he skips leg day to
people mid set for psychologicalwarfare.
Frankly, it's genius. Just don't say it to me ever

(02:02:27):
again. And I mean ever caloric night
breaker. I saw you working on your posing
transitions in the cardio room, shirtless, covered in glitter
and doing your finger guns between each flex.
Is it regulation? Absolutely not.
Is it unforgettable? Also yes.

(02:02:49):
Keep it mildly. Illegal.
And you've got a real shot. Next up is Sly.
Everyone's counting reps and you're counting exit routes.
You train like you're pulling off a heist, not a workout, and
somehow it's working. Your flex routines look like a
distraction tactic, and honestly, it's kind of genius.

(02:03:10):
Just don't swap the winner's medal for decoy again, K?
We're still looking for the real1 Sidgic College alumni David
Lachance. I've noticed you just standing
off stage during everyone's posing practice, sipping
smoothies and whispering critiques like some kind of
shredded theater director. Either compete or stop making

(02:03:34):
people question their life choices.
Mid flex, preferably both. Punk.
Your guitar bass worms are great, but the gym floor is not
your stage. That said, your last spread
power chords have a certain magic, and if you bring that
same energy to the posing room, you might just create a new

(02:03:54):
category. Most melodic muscle Mongo the
Yeti giant. You've begun circulating Flyers
titled Carbs Are Lies, Shred theBread.
While your anti gluten crusade is noted, we do need to remind
you that carbs are kind of important for you.

(02:04:15):
You know, lifting heavy things and all.
At least let the other competitors eat their bagels in
peace. Saying chaos.
The mysterious new supplement powder you've been handing out
backstage has been described as tasting like moonlight in
danger. If that's legal, I don't even
care, just save me a scoop. Also your private posing room

(02:04:39):
with fog lasers and ambient chatting very own brand chatruse
Vex Shade, the smallest gnome inthe gym with the biggest magical
flair have caught you using sorcery to amplify your lifts,
sometimes with unexpected side effects like turning kettle
bells into glowing frogs mid set, your arcana enhanced

(02:05:02):
workouts, or definitely turning heads.
Just try to keep the fireballs away from the treadmills.
Yeah? And Bray as heroes.
Mister Man with glass, charcoal darts and D&D Virgin Your team
routine rehearsals for the competition has turned into an
elaborate stage play, the fake swords, synchronized flexing,

(02:05:24):
and the villain monologue. I don't know how this will score
with the judges, but I already sold tickets.
Bjorn, any master of weapons, Toby Large and John Carroll.
You're still sneaking Mirror Noir into the gym as your team

(02:05:44):
nutritionist, You think? I can't tell?
That's him under the sunglasses,the fake bicep suit, and if I
see him backstage coaching again, we're going to be bumped
that band of one year. Also, that's a nice fake
mustache. Did he steal that from Menace,
Johnny Tarr, Avanox, Cypress, Daywind and Nico?

(02:06:07):
Team Pickleball has entered the group posing category under the
title Flex and Paddle. The use of pickleball paddles as
props Weirdly elegant. Just remember, if you drop 1
during your routine, it's an automatic point deduction unless
you can play it off with a powerful pose.

(02:06:28):
Drown TNU 2 Point O and Tim AKA Heart U3 are still in training
mode and it shows. I've seen the sweat, the
grunting and the chalk clouds and three man mirror prep talks.
Just remember this is a gym. Don't go too hard or I'll have

(02:06:49):
to enter the comp last minute just to remind people who built
this temple of glory. Well, that's it folks, that's
your contestants. Thanks again to everybody here
in the auditorium. Family keep lifting, flexing and
occasionally glowing unnatural energy.

(02:07:10):
The competition is coming. Stace wool drill out.

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HH: Ep. 8 - Scathing | DND404

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