Enlarge Your Vocabulary

"Hurry! It’s Fred – he’s been hit in the eye with an expergefactor!" _ © The recording may not be altered or used for commercial gain without the express written permission of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jefferson. No individual or entity may clone, reproduce, or record any sound imitating the voice of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jefferson without his express consent or that of his authorised representatives. This includes al...

'He's beginning to see the light – he's having an expergefaction!' (Ready the chorus of angels!) _ © The recording may not be altered or used for commercial gain without the express written permission of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jefferson. No individual or entity may clone, reproduce, or record any sound imitating the voice of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jefferson without his express consent or that of his authorised repre...

His calvity glistened in the early morning sun! _ © The recording may not be altered or used for commercial gain without the express written permission of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jefferson. No individual or entity may clone, reproduce, or record any sound imitating the voice of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jefferson without his express consent or that of his authorised representatives. This includes all methods, such as AI...

Silva’s electric alacrity dispelled the team’s despondency! _ © The recording may not be altered or used for commercial gain without the express written permission of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jefferson. No individual or entity may clone, reproduce, or record any sound imitating the voice of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jefferson without his express consent or that of his authorised representatives. This includes all methods...

'Eric and Phyllis are coming to dinner tonight.' 'Oh goodie, more ice cream for us — I guess they’ll enjoy their spoonful of self-control!' (maniacal laughter!) _ © The recording may not be altered or used for commercial gain without the express written permission of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jefferson. No individual or entity may clone, reproduce, or record any sound imitating the voice of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jeffe...

Reading Elizabeth Barrett Browning (1806–1861) was a prominent English poet of the Victorian era, renowned for her eloquent and passionate poetry. Born in County Durham, she gained literary acclaim with her collection "Sonnets from the Portuguese," which expresses her deep love for fellow poet Robert Browning. Note: The reading was recorded with a faint vinyl effect in the background. __ © The recording may not be altered or used f...

Julia’s little face lit up in loving delight as she hugged Teddy tightly — after Nana J’s sedulous efforts and her unwavering sedulity lovingly restored ‘Teddy’ back to life with every careful stitch! __ © The recording may not be altered or used for commercial gain without the express written permission of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jefferson. No individual or entity may clone, reproduce, or record any sound imitating the voic...

‘Here comes Paul, but what on earth is that ginormous thing he has on a leash?’ ‘Oh, that’s his best friend, his ego. He likes to take it for walkies each day!’ _ © The recording may not be altered or used for commercial gain without the express written permission of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jefferson. No individual or entity may clone, reproduce, or record any sound imitating the voice of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jeffe...

‘Do you know Des?’ ‘Oh, sure! He’s gold — one of the more complacent people in the community.’ ‘Ah, I think you mean “complaisant” — he’s always eager and willing to help.’ _ © The recording may not be altered or used for commercial gain without the express written permission of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jefferson. No individual or entity may clone, reproduce, or record any sound imitating the voice of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy ...

‘Hey! Aunt Bea is on her way over, and she’s bringing bucketloads of sweets!’ _ © The recording may not be altered or used for commercial gain without the express written permission of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jefferson. No individual or entity may clone, reproduce, or record any sound imitating the voice of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jefferson without his express consent or that of his authorised representatives. This in...

Reading Andrew Barton 'Banjo' Paterson, CBE (17 February 1864 – 5 February 1941). Patterson wrote the poem in 1896. It was originally published on the 25 July 1896 edition of the Sydney Mail. Mulga Bill's Bicycle tells the hilarious story of Mulga Bill, who thinks he's much better at cycling than he turns out to be. Note: The reading was recorded with faint vinyl effect in the background. __ © The recording may not be altered or u...

Reading

The black dog finds a troubled sleeper.

‘To be or not to be’ is probably the most famous soliloquy. Here is a man, unable to sleep, sitting on the side of his bed in the dark of night, wrestling with even darker thoughts, and firmly in the grip of “that black dog”.

The reference to the “black dog” is in honour of Mark Twain, who referred to depression as “that black dog”. Note: The reading was recorded with a faint vinyl ef...

'And the Oscar goes to ... (drumroll, please) ... Lenny the Lugubrious!' __ © The recording may not be altered or used for commercial gain without the express written permission of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jefferson. No individual or entity may clone, reproduce, or record any sound imitating the voice of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jefferson without his express consent or that of his authorised representatives. This includ...

'Where's dilatory Dan?' 'Sleeping of course!' __ © The recording may not be altered or used for commercial gain without the express written permission of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jefferson. No individual or entity may clone, reproduce, or record any sound imitating the voice of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jefferson without his express consent or that of his authorised representatives. This includes all methods, such as AI ...

‘Juxtapose or juxtaposition? Grab the popcorn; a showdown is a-comin’ to town!’ _ © The recording may not be altered or used for commercial gain without the express written permission of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jefferson. No individual or entity may clone, reproduce, or record any sound imitating the voice of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jefferson without his express consent or that of his authorised representatives. This ...

'Mum, granddad's outside splashing around in the rain again!' 'Oh, that old pluviophile!' __ © The recording may not be altered or used for commercial gain without the express written permission of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jefferson. No individual or entity may clone, reproduce, or record any sound imitating the voice of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jefferson without his express consent or that of his authorised representat...

‘Henry, quick! Call Father Jones — the beach is full of people apricating in public like there’s no tomorrow!’ _ © The recording may not be altered or used for commercial gain without the express written permission of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jefferson. No individual or entity may clone, reproduce, or record any sound imitating the voice of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jefferson without his express consent or that of his au...

'I'm fine; I'm just in a desiderium state of mind today!' __ © The recording may not be altered or used for commercial gain without the express written permission of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jefferson. No individual or entity may clone, reproduce, or record any sound imitating the voice of Floydius-Maximus Jeremy Thomas Jefferson without his express consent or that of his authorised representatives. This includes all methods,...

Reading Andrew Barton 'Banjo' Paterson, CBE (17 February 1864 – 5 February 1941), was an Australian bush poet, journalist, and author widely considered one of Australia's greatest writers. He is noted for composing the internationally famous song "Waltzing Matilda."

Paterson wrote the poem from the perspective of a city dweller who once met Clancy, a shearer and drover, and now longs for Clancy's life. "Clancy of the Overflow" was ...