Ep 57 | ADHD and Dyslexia: Empowering Lives, Breaking Barriers feat. Jacob Kelly

Jacob is my latest guest and we explore the power of representation, breaking barriers, and empowering lives. Here are some key takeaways from our conversation:

1️⃣ Representation Matters: Jacob highlights the importance of representation in prominent positions and the public eye. It's essential for individuals with ADHD and Dyslexia to see themselves reflected in various fields, as it can inspire and empower them to achieve their goals.

2️⃣ Managing Anger and Impulsivity: ADHD can come with challenges such as anger and impulsivity. Jacob shared his personal journey in managing these traits through sports and open communication. Understanding and explaining these struggles can foster understanding and resolve conflicts.

3️⃣ Challenging Stigma and Providing Support: Jacob is passionate about advocating for ADHD and Dyslexia, particularly in the context of parenting. He encourages open conversations, provides advice, and connects individuals with role models in various industries. It's crucial to challenge the stigma surrounding these conditions and provide the resources and support needed.

Listen to the episode for insightful discussions, personal experiences, and a fresh perspective on ADHD and Dyslexia. 

Follow me on Instagram: @EveryLPodcast for exclusive content

More about Jacob: 

Jacob is a mental health and neurodiversity advocate and shares his experiences of both on his Instagram page.

Jacob also hosts events and podcasts where he shares his life experiences of being an ADHD parent with lived experience of postal natal depression to educate, highlight and support those affected by neurodiversity and or Mental health.

Instagram handle? @: ADHDfatheruk X (aka Twtter) handle? @: ADHDfatheruk

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
Yeah, just any impulsive stuff. I always rememberat Christmas dinner, I'd be impulsive. Why
am I probably not getting a fight or just annoypeople? Not really thinking about that. And
I remember being told by multiple family members,oh, you've ruined Christmas, you've ruined
Christmas. But what they don't see is the memoryof whatever impulsive thing I did has gone,

(00:20):
but the shame and guilt of you've ruined Christmas,I still think of that at the age of 36.
Welcome ladies and gentlemen, I'm your host,Matt Brown and you're listening to the Every

(00:42):
L Podcast. Each episode we'll have a differentguest come on and talk about when life hangs
you in L, is it really a loss or is it somethingelse? Because not every L's a loss. So sit
back, relax and do what every guy do to getcomfortable as we get into this. Let's go!

(01:09):
Welcome everyone to another episode of EveryoPodcast. For every episode, we have a different
guest come on and talk about a situation wherethey've gone through something, they were hoping
or anticipated to go a certain way because theyplanned it to go that way, but then all of
a sudden life goes left instead of right andleft and feet in some sort of way. This is
something I believe is quite common with a lotof us where we've... planned our life to work

(01:31):
out. Like it could be a case of we've gone toschool, we've studied, we've gone to university,
got ourselves a holy put there. And next thingyou know, we're working a job that doesn't
require that degree. And then we've got a mountainfull of debt and our income is just not justifying
the investment we made. That's potentially anL for some folks. Other times it may not be
the case, but it's all about perspective andhow it impacts the individual personally. I'm

(01:55):
fortunate enough to be surrounded by a numberof amazing, incredible individuals. and this
guest is no exception. He is a fantastic individualwho I've known for a while now. We don't talk
as frequently as maybe I've spoken to otherfolks, but the work he does, how candid he
is, what he does, and it's just, the thing he'sgonna talk about is something that I personally

(02:17):
am invested in and would like to know more about,but I just love the fact that he's not shy
to talk about it. Some people would considerthis to be a bit of a stigma. something that
they don't wanna talk about for a number ofreasons, which I'm sure he'll touch on. But
I'm just so humbled and grateful that he isthe way he is, that he's so forthcoming with
it, he's so eloquent with it, and he's justwilling to help change the narrative around

(02:41):
this particular thing that he's so passionateabout and champions. But without going on for
too long, I have the fantastic Jacob, who'san amazing individual. Before I continue, I'm
gonna ask him to introduce himself, but whatI've recently been doing, and I will continue
doing, is because I'm mindful there are peoplethat are potentially visually impaired, I like
to not only introduce a person based on whattheir characteristics are in terms of what

(03:05):
they do and so forth like that, but also potentiallyjust give a very loose description of what
they look like, just so the listeners have anidea of who the individual is. So for instance,
I'm a black male, I'm six foot three, I'm hellaattractive. I'm saying that because I'm trying
to keep my wife on her toes if I'm on it foryou. But yeah, as ever you feel to describe
yourself, please share. Yeah, I'm Jacob. I'm5'10", white, slim build. I've got shades,

(03:37):
skinheads, and I'd say that's about me. Yeah,nice smile. People say I've got a nice smile,
nice eyes. You do indeed. And then do you wantme to do a little introduction about me? Yeah
man, please introduce yourself and what youdo. My name is Jacob Kelly, so I'm born and
bred Bristolian. My normal sort of day-to-dayjob, I work as a community mental health practitioner,

(03:59):
so I support people in the community that arestruggling with first episode psychosis. And
then I've got a couple of little other littleside hustles, so I work also on a mental health
mother and baby unit where I run a dad supportgroup. I work. a lot with the mums on the unit.
And then I've got a couple of other little things.I'll do some podcasts, I'll do some public

(04:23):
speech, speaking events and stuff like that.So I normally talk about my experiences of
post-natal depression after the birth of myson, and then also talk and share my experiences
of ADHD, which I was diagnosed aged 14. A bigpart of like what we're probably going to be
talking about a lot today is sort of about howI held on to a lot of that shame and guilt

(04:48):
and stigma and then from meeting other peoplethat have got lived experience that sort of
went and now I sort of live a life where I'mshaming guilt free because of from my ADHD
and post-natal depression. And yeah, I'm ina happy place. Probably the happiest I've been
in a long time. I was saying this to my wife,this is probably the happiest I think I've

(05:10):
ever been in my life. So yeah, and that's takena lot of hard. work and a lot of loss and a
lot of difficult experiences. So yeah, and that'swhat I suppose we're going to talk a lot about
today. And that's fantastic. And I'm so happythat she's here for it. Like the happiest you've
ever been. She's been a part of that. And thatis, yeah, that's incredible. So the first L

(05:35):
you said you wanted to talk about was ADHD.Now, I now let's see, can I remember what ADHD
stands for? Attentioned. deficit, hyper, no,I feel like I've lost it now. I'm falling off
a cliff now, Drax. Attention deficit hyperactivedisorder. Hyperactivity disorder. There we

(06:00):
go. Yeah, I did that because of hyperactivity.I was like, that's two words. I was like, no,
that's one. Yeah, so something like that. I'mlearning more and more as time progresses,
starting to feel that I show a lot of traitsof it. I know I do, but. Given my age, I am
not a priority. We've had this conversation.And you said you found out when you was 14,

(06:23):
which to some could be quite late. However,me being a grown adult as I am saying, that's
hella early, but I'm mindful that our culturesare slightly different. So I'm interested to
understand what your journey looked like, how.how you felt about that diagnosis and how that

(06:48):
impacted your identity. So please go back towhere you feel it's relevant to start and to
share what happened there. Yeah, so I remember,well see back then the knowledge on ADHD was
very little. Even the knowledge, so I was diagnoseda lot, probably about eight or nine with dyslexia.
Even the knowledge around dyslexia was poor.And that was, you know, I remember struggling

(07:14):
with reading and that was the focus on everything.Probably I had ADHD traits, but it was a margulina
in to this is dyslexia. So unable to sort ofconcentrate struggles with like my anger temper,
just completely unable to focus. And then very,you know, I went to a school that wasn't very

(07:36):
good. And I think if I would have stayed there.I don't think, I generally don't think it would
have been picked up just because there wasn'tmuch representation. There wasn't many young
children being diagnosed then. And it only sortof happened really because I moved schools
to a better school, but the Senco out of thatschool had just done training on ADHD. My mum's

(08:00):
best friend's son had just been diagnosed. Soshe was like, oh well. there she could see
it like black and white so she could see I wasvery similar to him and the stories that she
would hear from a friend were very similar toher experiences with me. So that like now so
thankful that I got my diagnosis at that ageand I've spoken to teachers since like primary

(08:26):
school teachers who taught me and they sentme some of my old reports that some of them
randomly some of them have kept and then one.did a statement and like there was stuff I
just couldn't remember. I didn't realise I wasone to one for most of my primary school years
and they were just like all the stuff they saidin the report was all symptoms of ADHD but

(08:47):
obviously back then even they would say youknow they just thought this was symptoms of
dyslexia and my sort of journey with ADHD didn'treally, there wasn't, it was very, once I was
on the medication so I was given medicationat 14 because I was so unable to concentrate
focus, like really live happy content life,you know, there's a lot of like arguments,

(09:13):
a lot of things I was unable to do. Once I startedon the meds things changed and like it was,
yeah, it was a game changer really for my out,my opportunities in life and sort of where
I would probably end up. I think generally ifI wouldn't have started on meds, my outcomes
and my career progression and you know, justoutcomes generally with kids or wife just wouldn't

(09:40):
be, I wouldn't be married, I wouldn't have twokids, I wouldn't have a job if you want for
medication. I know it's not for everyone butfor me as a young boy, like I just, one example
I remember doing my GCSEs and not taking mymeds and I got kicked out after ten minutes.
Next day I remember to take my meds and I stayedfor the whole two hours

(10:05):
But really, I think with ADHD, I hadn't really,I was content of taking the medication and
being told that was the fix. And I rememberbeing told when I got my diagnosis, they were
like, you'll be on meds for the rest of yourlife. This is a long lasting mental health
condition. And that's it basically. And I rememberjust thinking like, well, I don't feel like

(10:29):
I've got a mental health condition. I don'tfeel like I'm mentally unwell. They didn't
have such thing as neurodiversity then. So yourclasses, it was classes mental health condition.
All my visits would have to go to communitymental health buildings. So there was a lot
of shame, a lot of guilt and stigma. No oneknew, like a few, maybe a handful of classmates

(10:54):
knew. Obviously teachers knew, no, like a coupleof family members knew, but it's a real big
thing. I didn't talk about it. And that lastedup to the age of probably 25, even relationships
I had been in, didn't tell them I remember secretlytaking tablets on secret and that stigma was

(11:14):
rife because there was no such thing as ADHDrepresentation. There's no one I could look
at as a role model or to look up to and go,they're going through what I'm going through.
So it was real different. And then the changecame. There's a couple of things just luckily
in life. My wife was pregnant with my daughterand we were like, well, I'll look up what it's

(11:40):
like. There must be some books on dads withADHD and there was nothing. There was no books
about or parents talking about what it's liketo be a parent with ADHD. There was loads of
stuff about being a parent of children withADHD, but there's nothing. I remember just
thinking, this is terrible. This is useless.I'm just going in blind. And so I was like,

(12:00):
well, I don't want this feeling for anyone else.So I'll start writing little like top tips
for the first trimester, second trimester, thirdtrimester, and then start saying stuff on Twitter.
And then when my daughter was born, she wasthe first girl to be born in our family in
like 85 years. So I was like, oh, like I knowADHD can sometimes be prominent in the children.

(12:22):
I'll do some research. in ADHD in girls andit was just nothing there. This is like now,
in the world we live in now, it's like hugeADHD in girls. Back even six years ago, there
was nothing, no representation. There's a coupleof people online, but they're older. And so
I started doing more research and go, okay,there's loads of like inequality here for girls

(12:43):
in ADHD and started doing stuff. And then itjust happened like, I don't really know how,
but the ADHD service I was under, I also, they'reunder the same mental health trust that I work
for and they were like, oh, we're doing an ADHDevent, would you be up for doing a talk? I
was like, yeah, that's fine. And then I wentto the event and it was an ADHD sort of conference,

(13:08):
but it was attended by some like 200 ADHD peoplein Bristol. And that was really like the first
time I'd ever met an adult or anyone with ADHDknowingly. And so from going from no one...
to being in a room of 200, I was like, oh myGod. It was just like one of the best experiences
of my life. There's nothing that can describeit really. It's just like being with people

(13:31):
that are like you, that have been through thepain that you've been through and that you
can just talk about the horrible bits but thenlaugh about it because you've both been through
it. And that was the game changer. I was like,I like this feeling of knowing more people
with AHD so then started going and going. Yeah,it was a... It was a game changer really and

(13:51):
like a lot of the work I do now sort of on socialmedia, but not really advertised sort of behind
the scenes. I get a lot of messages from likeparents, particularly mums of children with
ADHD and they'll say, I don't know, my son'sgot ADHD, he's really struggling, what tips
would you recommend or what would you recommend?And one thing I've always tried to do if I

(14:14):
can, I'll say like, what do they like doing?And so for example, one. came to me, I think
a year ago. As she said, my son loves playingfootball. He's seven, he's in an academy, loves
playing football. And I thought, well, whenI was seven, I would have loved to have met
an ADHD footballer. I would have loved to seethat. At the time, there was no out, like publicly

(14:37):
ADHD professional footballers. So luckily Ihad some contacts and a few people asked around
and found one who hadn't come out. publiclybut wanted to help in some way so we chatted
and then that footballer had a chat with themum and sent some videos to the kids and And
then it went from that and that parent absolutelyloved that and found it so helpful I was like

(15:03):
let's do more of that. So there's we've doneit a few other times So we've got there's a
couple of people I've got in different industriesthat sometimes will do videos. So there's an
amazing professional boxer called Ben Whitakerwho is an Olympian, he did a video for a young
17 year old boy who was struggling with thatsort of identity of ADHD and the shame that

(15:25):
comes with it and sort of the sometimes feelinglike maybe like emasculated because you've
got ADHD so to hear an Olympic professionalboxer go I've got ADHD you know you can do
it we're the strong ones and all this it justsmashes all that stigma so that's something
I like doing it's I wouldn't say it's easy Andthe more and more I work with sort of ADHD

(15:49):
people in the public eye, I think the word hasgot around. So some people have come to me
and so there's someone I'm working with at themoment who I can't say too much, but they're
in the public eye and they play professionalsport and they represent their country in that
professional sport and they want to discloselike publicly about their ADHD. So I'm working

(16:14):
with them to support them. how they do it ina way that is comfortable for them. So that's
a lot of stuff I do with the ADHD, but a bigpart of it was the power of peer to peer experience
and meeting others that have been through thatADHD and then go, actually, that is really
normal. So like now, I would say like my, thepeople I follow on social media, I mainly only

(16:38):
follow people with lived experience of somesort of ADHD or depression or trauma. I don't
really follow celebrities unless there's a linkthere. So that means really like then I'm surrounded
by like all this every day I just see positivestories or just stories of hope or ADHD and

(17:01):
then it makes for me it's then changed my viewon representation and how important it is.
So that yeah that's a big part of the work Ido on ADHD is around that sort of stuff but
I think if I look back at little Jacob. backin the day, I think it was a lonely, you know,
unwelcoming, there was no love for ADHD, norepresentation. And I hold that sort of negative

(17:29):
traumatic experience quite close to me. Becauseif it wasn't for that, I wouldn't have ended
up sort of where I am now. So I wouldn't goback and change. I definitely wouldn't change
it. I wouldn't go back keenly. But I think becauseof those traumatic bits and like the moments
of just being a loner, sort of going throughchildhood, early adulthood. I think that's

(17:55):
made me sort of resilient to sort of where Iam now. I think that's interesting to hear
that, especially with the part. And I'm, I'mgoing to touch on something more recently that
you've said, and then go back to earlier stage,that's all right. So you mentioned about how.
being surrounded by so many people who had ADHD,how it just felt, it was nice to be around

(18:20):
people. I would assume, and please correct meif I'm wrong, it's similar to just having people
that just get it. Like when you go to a comedyshow and everyone in the room is just laughing
at the same joke, people just get it. Oh, doyou remember when you were younger and this
happened? Yeah, we're laughing because we allget it. And now, instead of you, Thinking reacting

(18:43):
having these traits that not everyone has Couldfeel isolating but all of a sudden the majority
of folks are like Yeah, that it wasn't evenI can I guess I get that but as a mouth no,
no That is a thing that is a bonafide thing.We 100% Yeah, that's a thing. That is what

(19:04):
we do and if he was lonely growing up and youfelt that way then this must have felt like
Where have you been all my life? Yeah, a hundredpercent like now. So last, well it must be
earlier this year I went to watch, so afterthe professional footballer we worked with,
we managed to find three others. So there'sfour, there's now five that I'm aware of, but

(19:29):
I know there's loads more. But so I did somework with four of them. One of them I'm just
about to start some work with, but I actuallywent to watch one of them play football professionally
and- It was like reverting to a child. I waslike, there's no, he wasn't playing for a team
I support. I had no real links to his team,but there's something about knowing it was,

(19:52):
yeah, it was mad. It was like, I was a child.I was like, that's my boy. Like every little
thing he was doing, I was watching and mesmerizedand I said, that is the power of representation.
That is the power of going someone, you know,I'd love to say people look at me and go, oh
yeah, it's like, but there's something aboutsomeone in prominent positions or in the public

(20:16):
eye that it just gets people a bit more. Soto see a professional footballer play, you
know, I know young Jacob would have loved that.And so it's something I love to do more. Like
I've gone to see a few professional sports peopleperform in their different fields. and I absolutely

(20:38):
love it. I love seeing them perform. I loveseeing, it just feels like, I don't know, maybe
because I'm in the ADHD community, I'm likean old hag, because most of them are quite
young, newly diagnosed. 20 years I've been diagnosed.So now I look at it probably a lot differently

(21:01):
than some of the younger ones or the peoplewith newer diagnosis. I see the power of more
now. like giving back to younger ADHD people,as well as like, you know, people my age, but
I think there's so much to be done for youngerADHD kids. So like when I'm seeing like, professionals
coming out sharing their experiences, I'm like,yeah, you know, I would have loved that as

(21:23):
a child. Like I was saying the other day, Iused to love wrestling, and I noticed that
so there's a brand called AEW in America. andtheir world champions got ADHD and did a promo
where he talked about his ADHD. And I was like,I would have been in tears as a 13 year old
boy seeing the world champion talking abouthis experiences of ADHD. And I know that brand,

(21:48):
like after I found him, I was like, oh, there'slike four others that have talked about their
experiences of ADHD. So just having different,in different fields. So like, when we talk
about represent... representation in all fieldsin all areas of race, sexuality, all these
different areas is so important but like sofor example ADHD I can't name I couldn't for

(22:15):
me I talked to a lot of people with ADHD I couldn'tname one black British ADHD male maybe one
but couldn't name any like un-famous or likepeople doing content. I just couldn't name
it and there's no representation for that becauseI know what I've looked for it. I've looked

(22:38):
to try and find more representation of mainlyBritish, black, male ADHDers and it's... and
so that stuff like for me I'm like you knowthat poor representation is still there. It
might not be there for white young boys. butfor young black boys growing up in England,

(23:00):
there's still no representation for ADHD. Inthe public eye, there's probably maybe two
people that can think of, two singers. And maybeLabyrinth, maybe, yeah, two or three, but not
enough.

(23:31):
I think there's a part of me that rememberswhat it was like for me and knowing actually
there's still a lot to be done. There's amazing,you know, there's other groups. I think there's
a charity called ADHD Babes and they are anamazing female only charity that work with
black and ethnic minority group and they arean amazing charity, do amazing groups for women.

(23:55):
But I even said to them, I was like, do youknow any males? And they were like, nope, there's
none. What is it about that we're strugglingwith that? I can have, I know culturally there's
some differences of like, I know faith comesinto a big part of it. I've spoken to a lot
of people from those groups and they're sayingwhen they were growing up, they were from religious

(24:17):
backgrounds. I know Labyrinth talks on the diaryof the CEO about his upbringing was a very
Christian faith religion. And so the idea ofADHD back then just wouldn't have been a thing.
And so that's very different to my upbringing.So there's still work to be done. But yeah,
that's a big part of why I do that. I thinkthat representation in all areas is so important.

(24:39):
I agree. And you're right, there's a lot ofdisparity in the representation in that area.
And it is important to have that at the forefront.Hence why I have different guests, male, women,
however they identify it from different placesall over the world, wherever I can, just because
I want people to feel less alone. With yourselfgrowing up and all that you was going through,

(25:05):
did your parents make you feel that having ADHDwas an issue? So I think when you become a
parent, you look back at the way you were aparent and go, that was good, that wasn't so
good. And you question certain things, like,oh, I wouldn't do that as a parent. Like now

(25:27):
it's hard for me because I know there was nothingfor them, like maybe the old book. So there's
certain things that they did not knowing thatprobably I wouldn't do as a parent now. So
like a big thing I would do would be impulsive.So a big thing would be like, I don't know,
yeah, just any impulsive stuff. I always rememberChristmas dinner, I'd be impulsive, why am

(25:50):
I probably not getting a fight or just annoypeople. Not really thinking about that. And
I remember being told by multiple family members,oh, you've ruined Christmas, you've ruined
Christmas. But what they don't see is the memoryof whatever impulsive thing I did has gone,
but the shame and guilt of you've ruined Christmas,I still think of that at the age of 36. So

(26:12):
like, and that is very common for ADHD children.Like they'll do something, not know what they've
done, be shouted at, and they hold on to that.Or sometimes they'll say hurtful things. calm
down after the meltdown and then they'll besort of grieving and going through that process
of trauma of, oh my God, I've just said to mydad, I hate you or you're ugly or you're fat

(26:34):
or all these things. They just because theysay it and at that time they're not showing
that emotion or ability to reason or understandwhat they're saying is hurtful. They will,
once they've calmed down or through their life,they will hold that. And this stuff I said,

(26:54):
that was horrendous. And I have to hold, like,it's like, the closest I can describe it is
like, you know when you go on a night out andyou get so drunk and then you're like, oh,
you've said something or you've done somethingand you have no control in it. That's what
it's like. But imagine doing that when we'readults, it's okay, because we're adults, we
understand actually, this is a process and wecan apologize. But going through that, like,

(27:18):
from the age of, say, seven up. we do that enough,it's gonna affect someone's wellbeing, self-esteem,
which definitely did with me. But yeah, theynever, like, never said, I can never remember
them being like, seeing it as an issue. It wasnever like sold as a superpower or anything

(27:39):
like that, but it was never sold as like, I'mdifferent. It was in, there was good bits and
bad bits. In some ways, like we just never reallymentioned it. And in some ways that helped.
looking back now, I don't know if I would dothat thing, but I've ended up pretty good compared
to the statistics where most ADHD men go, whichis the prison system. So I said this to my

(28:06):
dad the other day, we're talking about, actuallywe know the ending of this story is that actually
I ended up in a good situation, I'm married,I've got two kids, but yeah, there's certain
things that probably didn't help. But there'sthings that my mum instilled at nothing to
do with ADHD. It's just good parenting of likefighting for the rights of your child. So she

(28:29):
always, any stuff I was in trouble with formy impulsivity or dyslexia, mainly my impulsivity,
she always fought for me and always went theextra mile and like always was a fantastic
advocate for my ADHD behind the scenes. Andthat probably influenced me in the work I do
now in mental health. So I think that's likethe thing that I sometimes underestimate, like

(28:55):
what she probably did behind the scenes. Lessmy dad because my mum brought me up, but like
yeah, behind the scenes what she did of beingan advocate for me and it feeling pretty normal.
You know, I had two older brothers who probablyat times would make jokes about my AHD, but
it was never a big joke. It was never like arecurrent joke. It would be like very ugly

(29:17):
names. maybe three times in my life that theysaid something, which, you know, that was like
the lowest of lows. If you said something aboutmy ADHD, so it just wasn't said. And like now
that I can look back and be thankful of thatreally. I think my mom probably looks back
and thinks, could things be different? But realistically,the education just wasn't there. So I think

(29:42):
she did a great job really with limited resourcesand educational information available. How
did it feel when you're struggling to understandthe words or the letters that are placed in
front of you because of your dyslexia and thenyour attention span just isn't allowing you

(30:06):
to kind of, I don't want to say push through,but sort of hang around long enough to try
and get a handle on it? Yeah. I can imagineas an adult because... as an adult, it's frustrating
enough as it is. But as a child, I can onlyimagine how infuriating that could have been.
And then if you haven't got other adults thatare creating an environment where you're allowed

(30:31):
to have your outburst to be you and react theway you need to just to get it at your system.
How did that feel in those times if you canremember? Yeah, like, just like I said, Obviously
when you have kids you worry, oh God are theygonna have ADHD, dyslexia? You just have naturally
have those concerns. And I remember like beforemy kids were born, I said to my wife, like

(30:57):
I genuinely would rather any of my kids haveADHD than dyslexia. Because I, for me dyslexia
was so disabilitating, especially at schoolwhere everything was like that. You know, with
ADHD I had medication that really helped withmy impulsivity and my. my focus but there was
no tablet to take for dyslexia. So I rememberlike back then they were brutal like they would

(31:21):
say oh can you stand up in front of class andread this and I would just be like bright red
sweating. I hated it and like so now like evenlike I would say the medication I take it helps
but it doesn't take the full impulsivity awayor the if anything. I would say now my medication,

(31:42):
I've been on so long, they helped me impulsively,not so much with the distraction, little bits,
but not so much. So I've never been able tofinish a book, mainly because of dyslexia,
but also because of the ADHD. So like there'smoments in life where everyone's reading like
Harry Potter or certain books, and I just, I'vetried it, I lasted maybe like five or six pages.

(32:06):
And so there's certain things where. It's beenreally tricky, especially at school. That was
brutal, absolutely brutal. There's no quickerway of shaming the child than telling him to
read in front of everyone and he can't read.It's a very basic way of going, this guy's

(32:27):
stupid. And there's no sort of alternatives.Oh yeah, but he might be dyslexic, but most
architects are dyslexic. They didn't know thatthen, so they were just like, no, you're just
dumb. So yeah, it was brutal. And the mix ofADHD and dyslexia is not a nice mix. Like now

(32:48):
I'd say we've got technology to help. So likemost of my messages, I'll do voice note. I
can write and stuff like that, but it's so mucheasier to do voice notes or like I can, most
of the big texts at WordPress I'll copy andpaste and just put them into a file where it
will read it out to me. So. Luckily, technologyhas moved ahead, but back then, yeah, it was

(33:09):
hard. That's good. How, how did you navigatethose times when you felt, to use your words,
stupid, because you'd go bright red becauseof the lack of your inability to read and that
precious situation, did you react in a certainway? Did you become withdrawn? What? did that

(33:34):
look like? So mine was anger. Like the big thingwith ADHD is also like inequality. So like
if I've done something right that I feel isright and I'm being told it's wrong, that a
sense of justice is a big thing with ADHD. Likeit like if there's inequalities or a sense
of this justice, you can like even now I findit infuriating. It's something that really

(34:03):
doesn't work well with me. And so, which isprobably why I do so well in my job with being
a great advocate for my clients and sort ofputting myself in front of them to fly their
flag sometimes. But yeah, back then it was anger.I would just be like, oh piss off sir, and
like storm out in the classroom or like justget out. And my mom always said like. is wherever

(34:28):
you lose your temper, just apologize straightaway. Like you can't be a bit angry at someone
who's apologizing. So like, I'll be like, yeah,sorry, sorry. You know, there was no, like,
no, no care. I really didn't mean it at all.But like, um, I was lucky in some ways, I think
teachers, you know, I remember taking in BBguns into school and like doing like being

(34:52):
naughty. But I think deep down, they knew Iwas a good kid and they knew when they had
me on all on the side, I was caring, kind, butthere were certain things I just weren't able
to hold it together because I think with someteachers, it was 50-50, like some completely
got me and they got the best at me. Others didn'tget me or get ADHD or dyslexia. They got the

(35:16):
worst out of me. So I know because I've spoketo teachers since, there was sometimes conflict
between teachers of how we treat this boy because...Some would go, oh, he's a kind guy, he just
needs extra support. Others were like, no, he'sa naughty boy, he's disrespectful. So I remember
one of the girls at the school, she was like,her job in drama was to make the sets. And

(35:41):
one of the tech teachers, the DT tech, had ago at her, and he always had a go at her. So
I was like, she'd come in crying. I rememberbeing a 15-year-old boy, like, no, this is
bang out of order. And now I was like, whatthe hell was that? Going up to him like...
getting in his face and saying like, oh, ifyou want to pick on someone, pick on me. Like,
da da. And like, fully committing to this right,nah. He's made a little, like a young girl

(36:06):
cry. I'm gonna stick up for this girl to this37 year old man who could have easily snapped
me an ass. But like, for me, it was that like,that injustice of why would you do that? Why
would you, like, what's the benefit? And soyeah, anger was a big one. Now I would say
I manage my anger pretty well with getting myexcess, like doing sports, that gets a lot

(36:31):
of my anger out. Very, very rare, very rareI lose it. And what comes with when I lose
it is probably one stupid decision, so it mightbe punching a wall or something like that.
And then what is left is probably six monthsworth of shame and guilt of how did I let that

(36:51):
happen. And that's just very rare it happens.And the only way it gets better is me doing
education or research about ADHD and anger.But I think that's the bit that people don't
see. How a lot of ADHD artists will hold onto those feelings for a long time. A big thing
I used to do was like, I would say somethingimpulsively, probably something like inappropriate

(37:15):
or just stupid or like rude. And then... I'llbe thinking about it for weeks. Oh, I shouldn't
say that, I shouldn't say that, I shouldn'tsay that. And the only way it goes is if I
go up to a person and just go, this is why Isaid it, I struggle. And then once I explain
it, they go, okay. Okay. So I'm taking a lotaway from this and I'll find it very interesting,
but you've covered a lot of bases. What I wannaask you is, I know you said that if you went

(37:40):
back in time, you wouldn't change anything,stuff like that. That sound is what it is.
But assuming you could go back in time and everythingremained intact. When would you go back in
time to, if I said, go back to your darkesttime, your most challenging time where you
just felt like, I can't keep going, I'm sickand tired of all this drama and being treated

(38:04):
a certain way or feeling a certain way. Whenwas that? And what would you say to your younger
self to just encourage yourself to keep goingforward? within ADHD, I suppose it would be
like, probably like that early teens where I'mstarting to like, care about girls and sort

(38:25):
of like, care about like how girls see me orthat sort of puberty area, area around like,
yeah, how people see me because my self esteemwas poor. I was, I seemed confident and chatty
and loud and a lot of that was probably theADHD. But really, I was quite insecure, you

(38:46):
know, a lot of like stigma around like the tabletsand stuff like that. Oh, no one's going to...
I remember someone saying to me, a very closefriend of mine, he was like, look, there's
two Jacobs, one Jacob without ADHD and one Jacobwith ADHD. The girl's going to go with the
one without because no one's going to love aguy with ADHD, not knowing how brutal that

(39:08):
was. And I was like, oh shit, I'm screwed. Andso I'd go back to that point and just say to
him, look... Things end up well, you end up,you know, marrying like the one love of your
life. You end up having two beautiful kids.But also you end up meeting so many other people,

(39:30):
ADHD-ers. You get to work with professionalfootballers, sports people, musicians, and
they respect you, not just, like they respectyou for your ADHD, not for who you are or like
what you've achieved or any stuff like that.for you as your young ADHD self. Yeah, I'll

(39:52):
just turn that and just say, look, things, itwill come to a stage where your ADHD, you see
it as a positive. And I'm at a stage now where,you know, without my ADHD, I definitely wouldn't
be in the job I'm in. I wouldn't be as creative,passionate as I am. You know, I'm lucky my

(40:12):
ADHD sort of. thing I love. So everyone willhave a thing. So it could be football, could
be puzzles or whatever it is. Mine is helpingpeople. And that's what I get a lot of passion
from. And I'm very lucky that I get to do thatas a paid job. So it ticks all my dopamine
hits all my dopamine triggers. And so I'm ableto do like, I get quick dopamine hits, and

(40:40):
I get to do it as a job. Um, not everyone islucky enough to find that. So yeah, that's
what I tell them. Like it will end up well andyou are, you end up very happy with two cute
kids. That's true. That's positive. Do you thinkthat how old would you be at that time? Would
you say 15? Yeah. 14, 15. Okay. Do you think14 slash 15 year old Jacob would listen to

(41:06):
what you said? Cause you said it very eloquently.Yeah, I think you would. I think like back
then. I was desperate for older male role models.So this young boy that had ADHD that was a
family friend, he was the only representationI had. And he was a lovely guy from an amazing

(41:29):
family. And he sadly later passed away. Butyeah, I think I was desperate for a role model,
desperate for some sort of father figure. Olderrole model so I think he would have picked
my hand off to be honest That's fantastic. SoI guess it's case in point that representation

(41:51):
is important. So if we're gonna say Or not weif you're gonna say that wasn't an L as in
your ADHD What are you calling? That what ismy ADHD? Yeah, because some people might say
having ADHD is a loss But in this instance,from what you've described, you've gained so

(42:12):
much from it, that what you're now calling it.What is it? I would say it's an ability to
share something really special with a smallgroup of people. So like, only the real people
in my family get to see the real ADHD take up,the real like bonkersness that comes with it.

(42:39):
and that is extremely, you know, okay, my wifewill say that is extremely hard at times, but
when she gets to see little like sparks of thegood stuff, the gold dust that comes with ADHD,
the let's get in the back of the car, let'sjust get in the car and go to the circus for
the day, or let's go to the beach, or let youknow, I've spent six hours hyper focused and

(43:01):
made this amazing tree house for the kids. Ihaven't had a sip of water, or go into the
toilet for six hours, but I managed to do this.When they get to see those snippets of gold
dust, and they appreciate it, and love you forthat bit, but also love you for the Jacob who's
dancing at seven o'clock in the evening, afterthe kids go in their bed, and all that craziness.

(43:25):
Yeah, I think if you get someone that gets you,it's special.

(43:46):
That's good. Did you ever think that you wouldbe able to meet someone who could accept you
for who you are? No We've all of all of whatyou got going on. No, no like my genuine like
goals as a young child and like teenage earlyyears was like I remember being six 18 my first

(44:12):
sort of proper job. I was like right. I wantto be the youngest pub owner at 21 and my life
would be living in a pub for the rest of mylife, working in horrible shifts, never owning
my house or having a car or nothing. But thatwas a genuine, like, I actually dreamt, like,
I was like, I want that. That was a dream. Like,now I can't imagine anything worse. And like,

(44:34):
there was no, I always wanted kids. I was verypaternal from a very young age, but there's
no thoughts about ever going to have kids. Iwas like, nah, no one's going to. want kids
or like it just wasn't even on the idea of havingkids or owning a house or owning a car. Like

(44:55):
it just wasn't even on a car. So like to haveall those things, I'm like how is this even
possible? Like that I've sort of ended up nottoo bad from a working class poor kid who was
on free school dinners, you know, lived in poverty.to where I am now. Yeah, it's crazy. My brother

(45:19):
said to me, he's like, you're middle class now,you own your own house. I was like, that's
bonkers. I said, I'm not, I'm still workingclass at the core. But yeah, for me, it just
wasn't even the idea of marrying someone thatloved me for my ADHD. I remember we moved house
and I found a stack of books, of ADHD books.I was like, what the hell is this? And what

(45:43):
she had been doing is like learning about ADHDsecretly. I was like, no, this is the one now.
Someone that's willing to learn those. Like,and why one of the books was like how to organize
your house. If you live with somebody, it seemsso like certain ways, there's certain ways
like to help with class, so like most basicstuff of just like all the knives go here,

(46:05):
the forks go here. And like everywhere has aplace and they stay in those places. But the
fact that she had read that book. like pageto page and basically organise our house in
an ADHD friendly way without even telling me.I was like, yeah, this is a keeper for me.
That's lovely. That is, sounds super stupid,but years ago when my wife and I were dating

(46:27):
at the time, we were going out, I told her Iliked this movie, was it Scorpion King? And
everyone's probably thinking the one with therock in it. And it wasn't, it was a martial
arts film. Okay. But she went and got it forme on DVD. Yes, people, DVD, shut up. When
I got it from in DVD and now you're like, yeah,this wasn't serious because they're not they're
not just looking at a surface level They'vegone below the layers that are really into

(46:51):
you as an individual So I think that is absolutelypowerful now I'm very mindful of the second
or you want to talk about but that one to meis very close to my heart And if you're keen
to jump back on I'm happy to have you back onto talk about that at length because I have
Some unique questions. I'd like to ask aroundit But following on from this, actually, do

(47:12):
I get you buying that you're gonna come backon for another episode? Yeah, yeah, I'll definitely
come back. Everyone's heard now that you saidyou're gonna jump back on again, so no backseat.
With the fact that your now wife did all thatstuff, is there anything in particular you
felt that those in your circle of friends, familyand other, whatever, however you wanna describe

(47:39):
the circle itself? Is there anything you feelthat they could have done differently to been
more accommodating to your condition? Yeah,I think like, yeah, I only know about the books
that my wife had cause I found the books. Ithink. I know no one in my family did any reading.

(48:01):
Well, I wasn't aware of any other family doingany reading or education. I'm sure my mom probably
did some. But there's something about growingup wanting to know that, like knowing that,
like the story I say about my wife is nice becauseI find out. It's nice because I'm like, oh
gosh, she knows me. And so as a young kid, Iwould have liked to have known that they were

(48:22):
doing that research because then you're like,okay, they care about. me and they learn, they
want to learn, they want to know more aboutthis thing that I'm going through. At times
it felt like I was going through it on my ownand you know I remember going to appointments
on my own sometimes and like being still quiteyoung and yeah so like if I can go back I'll

(48:46):
just say look if you're doing that stuff lethim know because he wants to know that you're
and if you're not doing it maybe start doingit and let him know. So I know my dad didn't
do none of that. He didn't do no, even now,you know, if I say to him, what have, no, I've
been diagnosed with it for 20 years. If I say,what have I been diagnosed with? He'd be like,

(49:07):
ABCD? ABC, is it ABCDD? Yeah, he's never gone,what is it actually like going through it?
Is it debilitating? Is it, yeah, he never askedme any of those questions. And I don't know
if that's a generational thing or just. olderman thing of just being brought up of that
way of men don't talk about their emotions andfeelings or like yeah maybe I don't know you

(49:32):
just don't talk about it so yeah maybe I wouldhave wanted them to do a bit more research
or just reading stuff and let me know that they'redoing that. Question when the first job you've
got did you declare that you had ADHD? No, no,I remember, well, the first couple, like no

(49:55):
one knew. And then I worked in loads of pubs,clubs, no one knew. And then I can't remember
what I worked in a nursing home, which was aterrible nursing home, like awful. And I must've
like told one of the someone, I think I toldhim I had ADHD, then I have a clue what it
was. And maybe I slipped, or like, or just,I had to pick my meds up on the way. put me

(50:19):
in a locker or something like that. And thenback then they were controlled drugs and they
were like, you've brought controlled drugs ontoa nursing home and they should have been locked
away. Yeah, officially, possibly, but and thatwas a big thing. And so, and I was made to
feel like piece of shit. So I didn't tell, Idon't know when I went into mental health,
didn't tell them. It was only, I'd been workingin mental health maybe eight years on loads

(50:44):
of different units. I started a job and on theinterview, they had someone who had lived experience
with psychosis and he'd shared a bit about him.So it just naturally came out and they didn't
say nothing about it. And I was like, okay,this seems all right. And they literally didn't
make a thing of it. They were like, okay, cool.And then, because I wasn't asking for any reasonable

(51:07):
adjustments or anything then. And then becausethey were cool with it, my confidence grew
with it. And then like now I'd say everyonein my building knows. they know I've got ADHD
and that's because I've sent a lot of resourcesout, but that was because it was nurtured well.
But yeah, the first couple of ones, no way.Because I was still going, a lot of people,

(51:31):
the stigma is still pretty high in the community.If you're working in certain industries, you
will be treated differently if you say you gotADHD, unfortunately.
Is there any accommodations that are made foryou because of your ADHD? Yeah, I get away

(51:51):
with probably a little bit more. So like inthe workplace, so I always say like my ADHD
has to come out somewhere. So before I had kids,my ADHD would come out at home and at work
I was pretty sensible, in the office prettysensible, definitely with my clients, very
sensible. Now I've got kids, I've got to holdit together a bit more at home. So I'm sensible

(52:15):
at home within reason, sensible with my clients,but in the office, that's when it all comes
out, unfortunately. So there's certain thingsthat are just a bit more impulsive and I'm
better at managing it now. So it might be likegetting off the phone with someone, you know,
another practitioner, another colleague, maybe,who hasn't given me a good, like the conversations

(52:38):
not very well. Most people hang that up, butI would love. hang it up, fucking, a lot of
swearing sometimes. And they understand becausenine times out of 10, once it's calm down,
I'm like, sorry, so sorry, sorry. Yeah, so itdefinitely comes out. They're a bit more accommodating
with that and other things they're probablymore accommodating with. Like, but more, the

(53:03):
main thing is impulsivity around doing stuffbecause nine times out of, the good bit is
nine times out of 10, they know. I will cometo the conclusion myself, it just takes a little
bit of time and sometimes I'll be like veryjust frustrated at the system or certain things

(53:23):
and it might come out like that but nine timesat ten, nine times at ten it will be impulsive
stuff like yeah just stupid stuff like on aFriday afternoon we'll just be messing about
or yeah let's throw paper airplanes downstairsand like at the managers. office or knock out
ginger and stuff like that. Which unfortunatelyin mental health, the job is so strict, like

(53:47):
so stressful, that culture does come out anyway.So I'm quite lucky there's other person that
is in those offices that, you know, we are veryprofessional with our clients and very professional
with our staff. But sometimes if you've hada day of working in severe stressful traumatic
experiences, you just need sometimes to go,oh, let's just talk about some stupid jokes

(54:10):
or do something stupid. So when I worked onthe ward, we get away with hiding in cupboards
and stuff like that. And yeah, murder back then.Like now when you think of some of the stuff
we got up to is you couldn't get away with itnow. That's good. So interestingly enough,
you said something and I was like, Oh, wantto ask you a question about it. And it was

(54:32):
the fact that it came out that you had ADHDin your most recent employment and they just
kind of didn't make it a thing. What would yourather, and I'm aware this could change depending
on the situation, who you're speaking to andstuff like that, but would you rather someone
talk to you about your ADHD once they foundout, let's assume you've mentioned it in passing,

(54:57):
would you want them to then have a conversationaround it or would you rather them continue
and just acknowledge it, but don't make it anissue. Now I'm pretty open. I welcome any questions.
Nine times out of 10, people that are askingme questions are either got their own experiences
or a friend or a family member is affected byADHD. So they generally want to know like certain

(55:23):
things. It's very rare that someone asks youquestions because they don't have a link in
some way. They just don't ask me these questions.I think they're worried they're going to say
something like that's gonna upset me but Yeah,I'm pretty open to it now I'll always let people
ask me questions because sometimes I imaginesome people might not have met someone with

(55:49):
AHD so they might have heard some terrible rumoursor terrible ill-informed like facts that aren't
facts. So sometimes I like to let them knowlike what the truth is around certain things.
So a lot of the one thing I get a lot is, oh,it's from normally parents without like who

(56:10):
don't know anything about ADHD. They'll say,oh no, it's too young to diagnose a child with
ADHD when they're like five or six. It's tooyoung, we just got to let them. And I'm very
open. I say, look, the evidence shows the goldstandard is five to eight. the longer you leave
it after eight, the more negative impact ithas on that child's mental health outcomes.

(56:33):
We know that because that's what the facts andthe data shows. So you might feel it's too
young, but the data is telling us the longerwe're leaving it, this is having a massive
impact negatively on their mental health outcomes.So yeah, sometimes I let them know if they're
coming out with some rubbish or they've justheard the wrong. information and it might,

(56:56):
you know, I think some people have never beeninvolved in ADHD, the idea, you know, you hear,
oh yeah, eight year olds being medicated withADHD, five year olds being medicated with ADHD,
like, oh, that's too young, whatever, you know,see what it's like for that five year old.
You know, I was chatting to a parent today who'ssix year olds, just started medication, she

(57:21):
said like, he's like a different child in apositive way. Before he was just crying all
the time, unhappy, fighting, and now he's ableto like live and be happy. And she said, he's
so happy. He's got friends, he's at school,he's able to stay at school. You know, for
him medication has been a lifeline. You know,I know it's not the same for everyone else.

(57:44):
So I don't think those parents that have thenegative outlook see those stories. I think
they're used to seeing the negative ones. Appreciateit. Just love your honesty and I love how eloquent
you are in explaining such topics that a lotof people consider stigma. And I'm very fortunate

(58:06):
in the sense that I am just very inquisitive.I like to know more about what I don't know
so I can try and be more inclusive, be moremindful and try and help people. And for those
people that don't know, I suspect I probablyhave ADHD. I have no idea. I do feel that a
lot of the traits I hear about, I can relateto, but I have, I have the ability to relate

(58:28):
to a lot of things I hear anyway. So unfortunately,because of my age, it's not always as forthcoming
with, hmm, maybe you do have that it's kindof like I'm at the bottom of the weight impact
weight impact and I get that is weight in thisway and I get that. But I'm sharing this because
I was thinking, should I share this? But whyam I going to encourage other people to shine

(58:51):
a light on things that people are scared to,and then I'm not going to be open and honest
with you guys on here, cause that's just notfair. So I will hopefully with the help of
Jacob and other people find out if I've ADHDor if not that something else, because at some
point it felt like I was probably on the spectrumbecause I can get very lost in things I'm doing.
I can be hyper focused. I can go hours uponend without going to toilet. I can go hours

(59:16):
on end with just doing whatever it is. somepeople don't even know, there's times where
I've spoken to someone in an interview, likerecorded a session like this. And by the end
of that day, I've edited a whole episode, donea trailer, done all the everything for it.
And it doesn't burn me out. I enjoy it. Andbecause of my culture, it's never really been

(59:39):
looked at as a thing. It's not been consideredas a thing. And that's where I'd like to break
it. But right now, I don't know if I do. I'mjust saying I'm on this journey. And if anyone
wants to inquire to find out what my journeylooks like, feel free to reach out to me and
find out. You can probably find my Instagramto be fair, but overall, which is every podcast.

(01:00:01):
But other than that, I just want to be openand honest about that fact and say, I'm trying
to find out, and I've got three beautiful babieswho may have it. I don't know, but irrespective,
I'm happy to love on them and support them inwhatever way I can. And that just means by
paying attention to and trying to support them.Hopefully, if we're having conversations like

(01:00:22):
this, I'm learning more about what I can doto be more of an ally, to be more supportive,
not just make assumptions when there is factsand data and ongoing research in these areas.
I wanna thank you for everything you've said,everything you shared, and how something that
had a massive stigma over it, and still to thisday, kinda does, that you didn't allow it to

(01:00:46):
limit you. didn't allow it to hinder your abilityto achieve the things that were beyond your
wildest dreams. And that I think will hopefullygive people hope and just dare to dream, to
know that there is a chance that they couldlead a fulfilled life, whether that means they're

(01:01:09):
in a relationship, whether it means they havea job, whether it means that they're a professional
sports person. whether that means whatever itis to them. The fact that it is possible and
not just for people with ADHD, people with dyslexiaas well, just because you are wired a certain

(01:01:30):
way doesn't necessarily mean that's the onlything you're gonna achieve are this, this and
this. This is so much more than that. And Ijust find people are beautiful individuals.
I consider us as all. different pieces of ajigsaw puzzle. And sometimes we just, the reason
why we don't thrive as much as we could do,because we just don't know where we fit in.

(01:01:54):
And until we find out where we fit in, we'rejust not gonna be satisfied. And I just love
hearing what you've done. For the next two minutes,could I ask you to please selfishly and unapologetically
plug anything and everything you got going onand where people can find you if they wanna
learn more. And hopefully learn more about ADHD.Yeah, sure. So I'm on Instagram and Twitter.

(01:02:21):
So I'm at ADHDFarvaUK. Yeah, definitely. Ifyou've got any questions, messaging me on that,
hopefully the next sort of 12, eight months,I'm hoping to do a podcast series for self
with BBC about ADHD. So fingers crossed thatwill. come out. So yeah, there's a couple of

(01:02:43):
things I've got in the woodwork that will beout in the next couple of months. But yeah,
if you want to message me on Instagram, it'sprobably the best way. And there's a couple
other things on there. So yeah, message me onthere. So top guy, an amazing guy. And I'll
encourage every single person to reach out tohim. All his details and stuff will be in a

(01:03:04):
show notes. So feel free to reach out to whereverpossible. But I honestly, thank you for the
time today for jumping on and sharing what youdid. I wish I had more time to talk to you
about ADHD, but I think it's important thatyou shared a lot, but I think that because
you're so eloquent and so passionate about whatyou do, I think it would do you a disservice

(01:03:28):
by going over the top of what we share here.I would rather people to reach out to you and
to have that conversation and continue the conversationwith you amongst all the other amazing things
you do. because it is so important that we dotry and normalise this. Yeah, just to add,
I'll be quick. If there's adults listening thatare thinking they might have AHD, there's a

(01:03:55):
thing called Psychiatry UK in the UK. So mostNHS waiting lists about three or four years,
there's a thing called Psychiatry UK, whichis basically like a private service, but you
don't pay for it, they charge the NHS. They'rewaiting lists about six months. If you are,
the one thing I am telling everyone now, donot get a private diagnosis if you can. They're

(01:04:18):
just not worth the paper they're written onthese days. Not because the diagnoses are any
different. GPs have now decided not to recognisethem. So I know lots of people that are getting
private diagnosis go to the GP and say, oh,so we call it shared care. So it's where you
get private diagnosis and then the GP decidesto share that care So they will then provide

(01:04:41):
the prescriptions most GPs now are not agreeingto do that with private diagnosis is so I know
loads people that spent three grand on privateones and The GP will not prescribe so then
a private diet a private Prescription can beup to 200 pound per prescription Where my NHS
one that cost me what nine pound? So yeah PsychiatryUK, if you're an adult, go through that. It's

(01:05:07):
only available in the UK. 18 plus, it's a freeservice. And it's six months wait. So I would
definitely, and there's loads of videos on TikTok,YouTube about Psychiatry UK. Message me if
you want more information. I know friends andfamily that have gone through them. So yeah,

(01:05:27):
don't be put off by the NHS waiting list. Soin Bristol, our waiting list in NHS is five
to 10 years. Yeah, massive bonkers. So yeah,there are other options available that are
free as well. Happy days, much appreciated forsharing. Again, that'll be in the show notes.
Those of you that listened, hopefully you gotsomething from this, something positive, a

(01:05:50):
little bit of an insight into terms of the lifeof a person with ADHD and what it looks like.
Sometimes it's easy to forget that even thoughperson can be functioning at a high level,
it seems like they've got all the ducks in arow and everything can sound. But like Jacob
said, he needs a release. And sometimes we don'tacknowledge those releases as just that, a

(01:06:12):
release. He seems to release it in a healthyway. And because he's open about his condition,
people understand what he's doing, why he'sdoing it and take it no further than that.
My question then is to you as a listener. Areyou making people aware of why you do what
you do so that they understand you a littlebit better? Please don't be keeping things

(01:06:35):
to yourself. Don't get it wrong. Don't shareeverything with everybody because not everyone's
on your side like that. But try to be a littlebit more open so that people understand you
better and do not misunderstand you. But I sayall this to say that, nothing about a caterpillar
taste is going to be a butterfly. And I hopeyou look after yourself until the next episode.
Take care. you