EP 253: Lights Off, Shirt On? Let's Talk About Sex! 5 Reasons Eating Disorders Block Intimacy + What Exactly to Do About It

Okay girlfriend, we're going there. We're talking about the thing nobody talks about when it comes to eating disorders: sex, intimacy, and what's happening (or NOT happening) in your bedroom.

If you've noticed your sex drive has disappeared, you're avoiding intimacy with your partner, you can't be present during sex because you're too busy worrying about what your body looks like, or your relationship is suffering and you don't know why - this episode is for you.

Host Lindsey Nichol gets incredibly vulnerable about her own experience with blocked intimacy during her eating disorder - how she was physically shut down, emotionally unavailable, and performing instead of experiencing. She shares the research-backed reasons why eating disorders completely sabotage intimacy (spoiler: your body is literally in survival mode), and gives you practical tools to address it.

This isn't just about emotional connection - we're talking about SEX. Physical intimacy. The bedroom. Your relationship with your spouse or partner. Because your eating disorder isn't just stealing your relationship with food and your body. It's stealing your relationship with your partner too.

In this episode, you'll learn:

• The 5 reasons why intimacy gets completely blocked when you have an eating disorder
• Why your libido has disappeared (hint: hormones, energy, survival mode)
• How body shame follows you into the bedroom
• Why you can't experience pleasure when you're disconnected from your body
• How to check your "intimacy temperature" and get honest about where you are
• Exactly what to say to your partner about what's going on
• Practical steps to start reconnecting

This is real talk. This is vulnerable. This is the conversation we need to have. So grab your favorite Tarjay journal and let's get into it.

Content Note: This episode discusses sexual intimacy and eating disorders openly. Best listened to in a private space.

In This Episode, You'll Hear:

Lindsey's Vulnerable Truth

• What intimacy looked like when she was in the thick of her eating disorder
• Being in a relationship while physically and emotionally shut down
• Not being present during sex - performing instead of experiencing
• Constantly worried about what her body looked like during intimacy
• Anxious thoughts: "Is my stomach flat enough? Can he feel certain parts? Should the lights be off? Should I keep my shirt on?"
• The realization: She wasn't experiencing intimacy, she was performing it

The Research Nobody Talks About

• Women with eating disorders experience significantly higher rates of sexual dysfunction
• Lower libido, avoidance of intimacy, relationship dissatisfaction are common
• We suffer in silence, fake it, avoid it, make excuses
• And our relationships suffer while we pretend everything is fine

The Question We're Answering Why is intimacy blocked when you struggle with an eating disorder? And what can you actually DO about it?

The 5 Reasons Why Intimacy Gets Blocked: Reason #1: Your Body is Literally Shutting Down

• When you restrict food,