June 19, 2024 • 16 mins
In this episode, I share my personal struggles with weight loss and how I realized that I was using my extra fluff as a way to hide from being visible and vulnerable. I talks about unwanted attention from men and others, and how I sabotaged her own progress whenever I got close to her goal weight. I then explains why focusing on the scale is not the answer, and why holistic health is the key to happiness and confidence. I invite you to join me on this journey of ditching the scale and focusing solely on your health. If you are ready to stop hiding behind your fluff and embrace holistic health, this episode is for you.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
>> Jolene (00:00):
Hey, guys, it's Jolene. Before we get started, did you know I
do group coaching every month that we take on two
powerful habits each week that become the cornerstone
of your health journey. And it works with every eating
style. Well, head on over to
holistichealthmadesimple.com.
abundant health to learn more. I had a
recent epiphany, and I figured if I'm feeling
(00:22):
this way, so many of you might be as well. And it
might just help you get over that hump and
reach the healthiest version of you. I hope you find
this episode useful. If you are
ready to break free from the scale, feel your best,
and reclaim your health, you're in the right place.
Welcome to holistic health made simple, where
ancestral wisdom and science collide. I'm
(00:45):
Jolene, your nutritional therapy practitioner, and
BFF on, this wild ride. Let's explore
the transformative power of a holistic mindset,
the untapped potential of your gut health, the
mysteries of metabolism, and the pillars of
lifelong wellness. Say bye bye. To the
frustration of yo yo dieting and the allure of quick
fixes and the maze of contradictory
(01:07):
advice. Are you ready to step into this
new chapter of your life and become your healthiest,
most amazing self? Grab some water,
pop in those headphones, and let's get started.
Hey. Hey, there. So
I've been doing some diving into my own
personal patterns when it comes to a health or weight loss
(01:28):
journey, as well as observing others.
Now, there's plenty of people out there that
go on a diet. They get healthy, they lose the weight,
they reach goal, they maintain it, and it's great.
And then there's the rest of us.
And I fall in this category. We get
two goal. We get half of the weight of goal.
(01:49):
We get three quarters of the weight of goal, and something
happens. We start self sabotaging.
You know, we say, oh, well, we're not disciplined enough.
We don't have enough willpower. And
then you've got all the Internet saying, well, it has nothing to do with
that. It's hormones, it's insulin, it's
leptin, it's this, it's that. And now, there's also
(02:10):
a group that fits in the category of what
I'm talking about today that just can't get
past a week or two. What
if it's not necessarily
hormones? Leptin,
ghrelin, insulin,
calories, discipline,
willpower. What
(02:30):
if it's so far out of
our comfort zone
to be seen that
it's easier to hide behind our, fluff?
There, I said it. I, for
one, have lost anywhere from
50 to 100 pounds
three times in my adult life. I have lost
(02:53):
lots of smaller increments of weight in between
all of that. The very first
time I lost a considerable amount of weight, I
was in my twenties, and I was single.
And it brought a lot of attention that I thought
I wanted until I didn't.
You see, when I was younger,
(03:13):
I got teased a lot. I developed really
young. My name is Jolene.
I developed really young. You see where I'm
going with this? I got teased and was called Dolly Parton
all the time. And I got a lot of
attention around, my body that
I wasn't aware
(03:34):
of how to deal with. I wasn't old enough
because back in the seventies, girls
didn't develop as young as I did. So I was
not prepared for the attention
surrounding my body. It wasn't like I
was sexually abused. And I know some people out there
were. And that takes it to a far
further step than even where I'm going. But
(03:58):
I didn't like the attention on my body.
I can pinpoint. That is when I always kept a
little extra fluff. Now, I was never
really obese through my childhood, but I wasn't
skinny. I had extra fluff. I hit it
well, but I still had the extra fluff. And we're gonna leave it at
that. But realizing
(04:19):
that time and time again
in my life,
I've fallen back on hiding
behind the fluff. Now
I'm now at a point in my life
where I can't hide
behind that fluff. I need to be
(04:40):
healthy. I have people depending on me
that I need to take care of. So
I am here today to say I
understand it's easier
not to be visible. There's a
lot about how I've lived my life
and not being visible. Being the quiet
(05:01):
one, being everybody's friend,
but also being very alone and not doing
a lot with these friends. Everybody liked me,
but I was the guy that hid in the corner. I was the
quiet one. I was just the sidekick,
which was fine. I don't regret it.
But now
(05:22):
is my time to
step out of my comfort
zone, to step out of
being invisible. I mean, funny story here.
My husband and I joke all the time that, when we're driving in my
car, we're literally invisible because people will cut us
off, turn in front of us like we're not even there.
(05:42):
And sometimes that's how I feel like I live my
life. And I want you to know
that I see you
struggling like I did and not knowing
why I couldn't stick to
anything. Now, I'm
not a psychologist, I am not a mental health
professional, but I am, a gen
(06:04):
xer. And I know how to stuff those feelings
aside. But the one thing I
refuse to do right now is not to face that
fear. Because if I fall,
pray and let that fear win.
I can't help you. And I have
the knowledge and the desire and the
empathy and the compassion because I've
(06:26):
lived it to help you through
the other side. Part of me
sharing this is that I
see too often the blame
of excess weight, being pushed on, being
lazy. your hormones are out of whack, you
can't count calories, you can't exercise, you can't
(06:46):
do this, you can't do that. I can't do this. That person's
not doing that. Whatever it is, we need to
stop. We need to
stop. And even more
importantly than stop with the blame
game, we
need to focus on, being the
healthiest version of ourselves
(07:08):
and stop looking at the outside
appearance as health. Because
like all of the blame, there are
many reasons why
we struggle to lose weight.
Besides the invisibility thing, there are
lots of health reasons. So
(07:29):
why not focus on getting
healthy and stop
focusing on that damn scale. There's lots of
reasons why we desire to lose
weight, why we want to be smaller.
However, if we're not healthy,
we're just going to end up right where we are today or
(07:50):
worse. And I know, I've
been there. And part of being healthy is
being aware
of why we do certain
things. Holistic health is
complete health, mind, body and soul
being in alignment.
Now, I can't do anything
(08:12):
about being teased as a kid.
I'm 53. I will be 54 pretty soon.
I can't do anything about that. But what
I can do is m live
in a way that my future self will
be proud, not in a way
that is a fearful because of my previous
(08:33):
self, the old self, the self
that anytime they were in a loving
relationship, or they thought they were
in a loving relationship and they gained a few pounds, the
boyfriend would make a comment or leave. And
that weight became the issue. And it was
easier to hide behind the
excess weight than truly
(08:56):
live as my best self. And I for
one want to be my best self.
I for one want to take
all of the health knowledge I have,
as well as all of the struggles I have had
in the past 53, almost 54
years, and help you through yours
(09:16):
and be a visible person.
Now, I'm not going to take you on
some sappy trauma, whatever
journey.
That's not my thing. My thing is for you
today is to look at
your patterns and figure out
why you hide behind your
fluff, why you struggle
(09:39):
so much to get over into
the healthy range. What is
it? Are you afraid? Afraid that your friends are going to walk away
from you because you don't want to eat all the junk food or drink
like they do? Figure it
out. And then
you can take a step, a tippy toe step, a
(09:59):
very little step outside of that comfort zone.
Maybe it's going out with your
girlfriends and not drinking one night,
just once, and see how it is. See how they
react. Tell them your health depends on
it. But do it small,
do it what's comfortable.
(10:19):
Take the steps that you are
comfortable taking that are outside
of your comfort zone. Now, that
might seem a, little bit weird to say. And you're
like, huh? Huh? What I mean
is, find a
small step in. You can make
that you're comfortable trying that's outside
(10:41):
of that comfort zone. That'll push you outside.
You see small changes,
small habits lead
to big changes in the end.
And you might just be surprised that those
people that you think might flee you from doing whatever
or that negative attention you got when you were
(11:02):
younger probably won't happen now.
We're not that person one. We're much
stronger to tell the people to shut up. And if you're
not, hang with me for a while and I will help you
through that. But y'all know as we start hitting our
fifties, our give a damn button starts getting,
like, stronger and stronger, where we just don't give a damn.
(11:22):
It's time to be your healthiest
self. You've lived in the shadows
way, way too long. And
as I'm recording this, I want you to know what
I am m saying is, as much for you as
it is for me, it's time
we all blossomed. It's time
(11:43):
we take our health seriously. Because with the food
we eat, our confidence increases. It's not
a physical thing. It's a mental thing. We are
giving our brain the food it
needs to be happy. As
you have more energy, you move more,
you start enjoying things
(12:03):
more. It's a process
that keeps going. So I
seriously would love for you to
join me on this journey of
ditching the scale and
focusing solely on complete
health. Your health. You
(12:24):
are worth it. And you are worth
shining. Shining through the
darkness and being that light to your
family, to your friends, to whoever
it is you want to be that light
for. I can tell you with
1000% confidence
that if you focus only
(12:45):
on the weight,
you, a, may never get healthy, and
b, you may never find that happiness
you're looking for. Your
physicality does not bring you
happiness. Finding things you love
to do and bring joy to
others brings you happiness.
(13:07):
If you have self confident issues now,
with a little bit of fluff, you're gonna have self
confidence in issues as a thin
person. Been there, done that,
own the t shirt. So, it's time.
We are midlifers and beyond.
Maybe you're not quite in midlife, but there is no
(13:27):
better time than today than to
work on your health
holistically. Holistic health, I used to think,
meant natural, doing things the
natural way. Well, I gotta tell you, holistic
health is whole health.
Mind, body, soul,
spirit, whatever you believe in. It
(13:50):
is a process where you are a
complete person at the end, where you are
completely present in your family, you are
completely present when you're by yourself. You are
completely present when you're with friends.
It has nothing to do with your physical
appearance. It has to do
solely with your health, your
(14:11):
mental health, your physical health,
and believing that you're part of, something
bigger than yourself.
I appreciate you listening. I
appreciate that you are on this journey with me,
and I would appreciate it even more
if you would link my arms and do it with me
(14:32):
each step.
So the first step today, your
homework is
look at your patterns, see
why you're more comfortable, even if
you're physically uncomfortable. We sometimes
are mentally more comfortable, a little fluffy,
and then say, I'm worth being
(14:52):
healthy. That's it. That's all I want you
to do. No changes, no nothing else.
Look at your patterns and then say
to yourself, I am worth being healthy.
You see, for those of us who use
fluff as a comfort, if we solely focus on
our health, we'll get to our end goal.
(15:13):
So I'm going to leave you with this, and you're going to hear
it from me more and more and more.
Health first. Don't worry about the
rest. Just focus on, being the healthiest
version of yourself.
On, that note, friends, I will see you next time.
Bye. Thanks for listening in today.
(15:33):
I hope you got some nuggets to take on your health journey.
Remember, this podcast is for educational and entertainment
purposes. No medical advice is being given by
listening to this podcast. You agree to the full disclaimer, which is linked
in the show notes. If you found this podcast helpful,
could you take 30 seconds and leave a review? Your
feedback means the world to me. And it helps others
discover my show. Once again, thank you for being part
(15:56):
of my community. Until next time, have a blessed day.
Hey, guys, it's Jolene. Before we get started, did you know I
do group coaching every month that we take on two
powerful habits each week that become the cornerstone
of your health journey. And it works with every eating
style. Well, head on over to
holistichealthmadesimple.com.
abundant health to learn more. I had a
recent epiphany, and I figured if I'm feeling
(00:22):
this way, so many of you might be as well. And it
might just help you get over that hump and
reach the healthiest version of you. I hope you find
this episode useful. If you are
ready to break free from the scale, feel your best,
and reclaim your health, you're in the right place.
Welcome to holistic health made simple, where
ancestral wisdom and science collide. I'm
(00:45):
Jolene, your nutritional therapy practitioner, and
BFF on, this wild ride. Let's explore
the transformative power of a holistic mindset,
the untapped potential of your gut health, the
mysteries of metabolism, and the pillars of
lifelong wellness. Say bye bye. To the
frustration of yo yo dieting and the allure of quick
fixes and the maze of contradictory
(01:07):
advice. Are you ready to step into this
new chapter of your life and become your healthiest,
most amazing self? Grab some water,
pop in those headphones, and let's get started.
Hey. Hey, there. So
I've been doing some diving into my own
personal patterns when it comes to a health or weight loss
(01:28):
journey, as well as observing others.
Now, there's plenty of people out there that
go on a diet. They get healthy, they lose the weight,
they reach goal, they maintain it, and it's great.
And then there's the rest of us.
And I fall in this category. We get
two goal. We get half of the weight of goal.
(01:49):
We get three quarters of the weight of goal, and something
happens. We start self sabotaging.
You know, we say, oh, well, we're not disciplined enough.
We don't have enough willpower. And
then you've got all the Internet saying, well, it has nothing to do with
that. It's hormones, it's insulin, it's
leptin, it's this, it's that. And now, there's also
(02:10):
a group that fits in the category of what
I'm talking about today that just can't get
past a week or two. What
if it's not necessarily
hormones? Leptin,
ghrelin, insulin,
calories, discipline,
willpower. What
(02:30):
if it's so far out of
our comfort zone
to be seen that
it's easier to hide behind our, fluff?
There, I said it. I, for
one, have lost anywhere from
50 to 100 pounds
three times in my adult life. I have lost
(02:53):
lots of smaller increments of weight in between
all of that. The very first
time I lost a considerable amount of weight, I
was in my twenties, and I was single.
And it brought a lot of attention that I thought
I wanted until I didn't.
You see, when I was younger,
(03:13):
I got teased a lot. I developed really
young. My name is Jolene.
I developed really young. You see where I'm
going with this? I got teased and was called Dolly Parton
all the time. And I got a lot of
attention around, my body that
I wasn't aware
(03:34):
of how to deal with. I wasn't old enough
because back in the seventies, girls
didn't develop as young as I did. So I was
not prepared for the attention
surrounding my body. It wasn't like I
was sexually abused. And I know some people out there
were. And that takes it to a far
further step than even where I'm going. But
(03:58):
I didn't like the attention on my body.
I can pinpoint. That is when I always kept a
little extra fluff. Now, I was never
really obese through my childhood, but I wasn't
skinny. I had extra fluff. I hit it
well, but I still had the extra fluff. And we're gonna leave it at
that. But realizing
(04:19):
that time and time again
in my life,
I've fallen back on hiding
behind the fluff. Now
I'm now at a point in my life
where I can't hide
behind that fluff. I need to be
(04:40):
healthy. I have people depending on me
that I need to take care of. So
I am here today to say I
understand it's easier
not to be visible. There's a
lot about how I've lived my life
and not being visible. Being the quiet
(05:01):
one, being everybody's friend,
but also being very alone and not doing
a lot with these friends. Everybody liked me,
but I was the guy that hid in the corner. I was the
quiet one. I was just the sidekick,
which was fine. I don't regret it.
But now
(05:22):
is my time to
step out of my comfort
zone, to step out of
being invisible. I mean, funny story here.
My husband and I joke all the time that, when we're driving in my
car, we're literally invisible because people will cut us
off, turn in front of us like we're not even there.
(05:42):
And sometimes that's how I feel like I live my
life. And I want you to know
that I see you
struggling like I did and not knowing
why I couldn't stick to
anything. Now, I'm
not a psychologist, I am not a mental health
professional, but I am, a gen
(06:04):
xer. And I know how to stuff those feelings
aside. But the one thing I
refuse to do right now is not to face that
fear. Because if I fall,
pray and let that fear win.
I can't help you. And I have
the knowledge and the desire and the
empathy and the compassion because I've
(06:26):
lived it to help you through
the other side. Part of me
sharing this is that I
see too often the blame
of excess weight, being pushed on, being
lazy. your hormones are out of whack, you
can't count calories, you can't exercise, you can't
(06:46):
do this, you can't do that. I can't do this. That person's
not doing that. Whatever it is, we need to
stop. We need to
stop. And even more
importantly than stop with the blame
game, we
need to focus on, being the
healthiest version of ourselves
(07:08):
and stop looking at the outside
appearance as health. Because
like all of the blame, there are
many reasons why
we struggle to lose weight.
Besides the invisibility thing, there are
lots of health reasons. So
(07:29):
why not focus on getting
healthy and stop
focusing on that damn scale. There's lots of
reasons why we desire to lose
weight, why we want to be smaller.
However, if we're not healthy,
we're just going to end up right where we are today or
(07:50):
worse. And I know, I've
been there. And part of being healthy is
being aware
of why we do certain
things. Holistic health is
complete health, mind, body and soul
being in alignment.
Now, I can't do anything
(08:12):
about being teased as a kid.
I'm 53. I will be 54 pretty soon.
I can't do anything about that. But what
I can do is m live
in a way that my future self will
be proud, not in a way
that is a fearful because of my previous
(08:33):
self, the old self, the self
that anytime they were in a loving
relationship, or they thought they were
in a loving relationship and they gained a few pounds, the
boyfriend would make a comment or leave. And
that weight became the issue. And it was
easier to hide behind the
excess weight than truly
(08:56):
live as my best self. And I for
one want to be my best self.
I for one want to take
all of the health knowledge I have,
as well as all of the struggles I have had
in the past 53, almost 54
years, and help you through yours
(09:16):
and be a visible person.
Now, I'm not going to take you on
some sappy trauma, whatever
journey.
That's not my thing. My thing is for you
today is to look at
your patterns and figure out
why you hide behind your
fluff, why you struggle
(09:39):
so much to get over into
the healthy range. What is
it? Are you afraid? Afraid that your friends are going to walk away
from you because you don't want to eat all the junk food or drink
like they do? Figure it
out. And then
you can take a step, a tippy toe step, a
(09:59):
very little step outside of that comfort zone.
Maybe it's going out with your
girlfriends and not drinking one night,
just once, and see how it is. See how they
react. Tell them your health depends on
it. But do it small,
do it what's comfortable.
(10:19):
Take the steps that you are
comfortable taking that are outside
of your comfort zone. Now, that
might seem a, little bit weird to say. And you're
like, huh? Huh? What I mean
is, find a
small step in. You can make
that you're comfortable trying that's outside
(10:41):
of that comfort zone. That'll push you outside.
You see small changes,
small habits lead
to big changes in the end.
And you might just be surprised that those
people that you think might flee you from doing whatever
or that negative attention you got when you were
(11:02):
younger probably won't happen now.
We're not that person one. We're much
stronger to tell the people to shut up. And if you're
not, hang with me for a while and I will help you
through that. But y'all know as we start hitting our
fifties, our give a damn button starts getting,
like, stronger and stronger, where we just don't give a damn.
(11:22):
It's time to be your healthiest
self. You've lived in the shadows
way, way too long. And
as I'm recording this, I want you to know what
I am m saying is, as much for you as
it is for me, it's time
we all blossomed. It's time
(11:43):
we take our health seriously. Because with the food
we eat, our confidence increases. It's not
a physical thing. It's a mental thing. We are
giving our brain the food it
needs to be happy. As
you have more energy, you move more,
you start enjoying things
(12:03):
more. It's a process
that keeps going. So I
seriously would love for you to
join me on this journey of
ditching the scale and
focusing solely on complete
health. Your health. You
(12:24):
are worth it. And you are worth
shining. Shining through the
darkness and being that light to your
family, to your friends, to whoever
it is you want to be that light
for. I can tell you with
1000% confidence
that if you focus only
(12:45):
on the weight,
you, a, may never get healthy, and
b, you may never find that happiness
you're looking for. Your
physicality does not bring you
happiness. Finding things you love
to do and bring joy to
others brings you happiness.
(13:07):
If you have self confident issues now,
with a little bit of fluff, you're gonna have self
confidence in issues as a thin
person. Been there, done that,
own the t shirt. So, it's time.
We are midlifers and beyond.
Maybe you're not quite in midlife, but there is no
(13:27):
better time than today than to
work on your health
holistically. Holistic health, I used to think,
meant natural, doing things the
natural way. Well, I gotta tell you, holistic
health is whole health.
Mind, body, soul,
spirit, whatever you believe in. It
(13:50):
is a process where you are a
complete person at the end, where you are
completely present in your family, you are
completely present when you're by yourself. You are
completely present when you're with friends.
It has nothing to do with your physical
appearance. It has to do
solely with your health, your
(14:11):
mental health, your physical health,
and believing that you're part of, something
bigger than yourself.
I appreciate you listening. I
appreciate that you are on this journey with me,
and I would appreciate it even more
if you would link my arms and do it with me
(14:32):
each step.
So the first step today, your
homework is
look at your patterns, see
why you're more comfortable, even if
you're physically uncomfortable. We sometimes
are mentally more comfortable, a little fluffy,
and then say, I'm worth being
(14:52):
healthy. That's it. That's all I want you
to do. No changes, no nothing else.
Look at your patterns and then say
to yourself, I am worth being healthy.
You see, for those of us who use
fluff as a comfort, if we solely focus on
our health, we'll get to our end goal.
(15:13):
So I'm going to leave you with this, and you're going to hear
it from me more and more and more.
Health first. Don't worry about the
rest. Just focus on, being the healthiest
version of yourself.
On, that note, friends, I will see you next time.
Bye. Thanks for listening in today.
(15:33):
I hope you got some nuggets to take on your health journey.
Remember, this podcast is for educational and entertainment
purposes. No medical advice is being given by
listening to this podcast. You agree to the full disclaimer, which is linked
in the show notes. If you found this podcast helpful,
could you take 30 seconds and leave a review? Your
feedback means the world to me. And it helps others
discover my show. Once again, thank you for being part
(15:56):
of my community. Until next time, have a blessed day.
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Does hearing about a true crime case always leave you scouring the internet for the truth behind the story? Dive into your next mystery with Crime Junkie. Every Monday, join your host Ashley Flowers as she unravels all the details of infamous and underreported true crime cases with her best friend Brit Prawat. From cold cases to missing persons and heroes in our community who seek justice, Crime Junkie is your destination for theories and stories you won’t hear anywhere else. Whether you're a seasoned true crime enthusiast or new to the genre, you'll find yourself on the edge of your seat awaiting a new episode every Monday. If you can never get enough true crime... Congratulations, you’ve found your people. Follow to join a community of Crime Junkies! Crime Junkie is presented by audiochuck Media Company.
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If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.